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Me, trumpeting the 1980 version of Pride and Prejudice while everyone else is busy fighting over 1995 and 2005. (I mean, 1980 had a Lady Catherine who was the right age! The amazing Judy Parfitt! Go off with your fights, I'll be over here with my old DVD collection.)

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Sometimes I think about the time I told my family that for Mother's Day, I was going to sit on the couch and not do anything for anyone. They were going to wait on me and I was going to relax and not worry about having to get anything done, just enjoy being taken care of. And then I was hit with one of the worst migraines I'd had in years and was left flat on the couch, unable to do anything for anyone. Absolute monkey paw nonsense right there.

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That's it. The full paperback cover for Miss Percy's Travel Guide (to Welsh Moors and Feral Dragons) (Miss Percy #2) now exists. And I love it.

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All sales are final...

I didn’t expect to see him on my doorstep.

“All sales are final,” I said, shutting the door before he could speak.

“Wait!” He shoved a booted foot in the gap, the oak slab crushing his toes. “I only want to talk.”

I opened the door, releasing his foot back to him.

“Moira.”

I shook my head. “You gave up permission to call me that.”

He sighed. “Miss Delaney.”

“Better.”

“The potion…”

“... is fake,” I interrupted him. “I told you. Some herbs and spices. A dash of honey to make it go down smoothly. At the most, it might cure your bad breath.”

“It wasn’t for me.” He lowered his chin. “She wanted it, thought it might strengthen our love.”

“She’s a fool.”

“Well...”

“You’re a fool,” I added. “Go home. Back to your lovely house and lovely girl and all the riches she’s brought you.”

“Moira,” he repeated. “I’m sorry.”

My hand went to the latch. “Go home, Finn.”

“I should’ve never left you,” he whispered. “But I couldn’t stand to be poor anymore, to toil and slog my way through life.”

I nodded along with his words. “And I gave you nothing,” I said. “Except everything I had.”

“You mix concoctions.” His lip curled upwards. “You’ve no real power, no skill with charms. And I was to work my fingers to the bone, for both of us?”

“You’re right.” I looked down, a study in penitence. “I’ve no skill with charms.”

“Moira, I—”

A whisper from my lips, and he diminished. A plop on the doorstep, and there he sat, all soft black feathers and pointed beak and two small wings.

“No skill with charms at all.” I scooped up the bird. “But this is a transformation spell. And if you were smart, you would’ve learned to tell the difference.”

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antiques roadshow guests will really say the most chilling sentences on live television and not realize they're creating 3 sentence horror stories.

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every time you get out of bed when you’re on your period the government should give you 6500€

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Well, I guess I’m back on Tumblr due to the uncertainty surrounding Twitter. Hoping to build a community of readers and friends.

A bit about me: I write dark fantasy and I also do cover art and book design for self-published authors. I also post horrendous memes.

Oh. I assume people like FREE BOOK.

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Me and "The Fonz" at premiere of Goncharov (1973) at Grauman's Chinese Theatre.

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Clawing my way through the writing of this book, one paragraph at a time.

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Maggie Rizer de vestido de Alexander McQueen para Givenchy, alta costura primavera verão 1998,com estampa de escama de peixe e cauda. Foto do Steven Meisel para a Vogue americana de abril de 98.

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I will do anything to avoid writing and chores.

Like learn to embroider and make bookmarks.

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Twitter is dying and mastodon scares me so you should buy my cozy fantasy book, Miss Percy's Pocket Guide to the Care and Feeding of British Dragons, about a 40yo spinster who loves cake. Also there is found family and a local vicar with whom our MC may or may not fall in love.

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my favorite art style is "woman who is absolutely done with this dude's crap"

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Incorrect Lord of the Rings Quotes

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Dreams of birds and tea, and magic😌✨

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Unless I can agonize over a profile song like I did on MySpace, I'm not dragging my middle-aged butt to ANOTHER social media site.

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this is so funny i