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N, beseeching whichever diety’s out there not to give him more trauma: No way, Jose! You know how many layers deep this agony cake is already? You want more? Sir, I am but a husk - as you can see, there’s not a molecule of serotonin, dopamine or endorphins in this lifeless body. There’s nothing left for you to take! You’ve created a robot raisin!
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*something that was messing w/ N’s regen is fixed, allowing him to heal his injuries*
N: Now I’m only scarred ✨emotionally!✨ 👉👉
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Random visitor: Wow, this place is depressing.
Lucifer: Yeah, well… when you’re constantly depressed, you don’t really notice!
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Cyn: Are Wii gonna have a problem?
Uzi: You’d best Switch up that attitude!
Alice: You’re playing a dangerous Game Boy.
Doll: Don’t Nintendo Sixty-Force me to use this.
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Lucifer: You wanna cut deep, huh? You wanna play dirty? Alright…
Lucifer: You’re. Not. Masculine.
Adam: *offended noise* You overrated little twink!
Lucifer: Hey- I am a twunk, alright? That is a combination- twink and hunk!
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Someone idk: What’s the hardest thing for you to say?
V: I’m wrong.
Uzi: I need help.
N: Worcestershire sauce.
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Spinel: What, y’think I’m funny? I’m a funny gem just cause I look like a clown? I suppose you think I shouldn’t have a scythe, either!
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Ragatha: Remember - more espresso, less depresso!
Gangle: *drinks coffee*
Gangle: I’m still depressed, but now I’m fast.
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Mammon: No- no, we have an understanding, and you do not break that!
Fizzarolli: …
Fizzarolli: I’m not you.
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V: Who are you?
Doll: You killed my parents.
V: …
V: Do you have the slightest idea how little that narrows it down?
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Random interrogator: Sit on that chair, we’re gonna interrogate you.
Uzi (whispering to N): Deny everything.
N: That’s not a chair!
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To any suicidal followers I may have: This is a sign to not kill yourself. You are loved and the world is special because you are in it. Keep holding on.
Reblog this when it’s on your dash. You will save someone’s life.
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Kidnapper: Serial Designation N, we have your significant other.
N: I… don’t have a significant other?
Kidnapper: Then who keeps yelling at us to bite her?
N: Oh Robo-God, you have Uzi-
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Seth: You’re horrible! Y- you’re an irredeemable monster!
Graulas: Ohh, oh, what took you so long, idiot?
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Ambrosius: Hold on, I’m gonna make sure Nimona is okay.
Ambrosius *calling over*: HEY NIMONA ARE YOU OKAAAAYYY
Nimona: Yeah.
Ambrosius: Are you sure?
Nimona: Yeah.
Ambrosius: I’m leaving, but I’ll be back!
Nimona: Okay.
Ambrosius: Do you need anything?
Nimona: No?
Ambrosius: …
Ambrosius: What season is that?
Nimona: 3.
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DBBQ ENA: Finally, after all these years, ENA has a gun!
Shepherd: ENA! You’re not supposed to have a gun!
DBBQ ENA: I can do what I want, cat lady!
Shepherd: Taski! It looks like ENA has gotten a gun.
Shepherd: Listen, Taski, it’s not safe to go alone; this is… a gun.
DBBQ ENA: I’ll shoot your family!
Shepherd: There’s only one thing to do now-
Narrator: She pulls out a gun too-
Shepherd: If Dream BBQ ENA’s got a f***ing gun, so will I!
Narrator: And then they just have a shoot-out in the middle of the street- *breaks down laughing*
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