rawchae - Tumblr blog

rawchae · 21 days ago

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Hit Record.

Non-Idol!Bang Chan x Artist!Fem! Reader

Content: Fluff!, Tiny bit suggestive

Word Count: 5.1K

Author's Note: This one just came to me right as before I was sleeping so, I'm sorry for the mistakes. 😔

Summary: Christopher was only a simple man who wanted to hear his songs sung, but when his boss becomes the hindering force, sometimes, you have to take matters into your own hands to reach your dreams. That's when he meets you, the missing link in his artistry... and possibly his heart?

Content Warning: Profanities, suggestive content if I missed anything, please tell me!

"How many times do I have to say that this shit ain't gonna be bought by anyone of those fucking producers, huh?!" The sound of papers scattering and desk weights hitting the floor reverberate around the office. Despite the closed off style and seemingly otherworldly feel within those four walls, Bang Chan knew that everyone who was outside heard the deafening bellow.

He can't blame them, he isn't the first one to have been ridiculed like this anyway. It just so happens that the younger caught his boss at such an edge with the continuous events of the junior groups' debuts and everything that's going on the music industry, you know, usual business.

"You are on thin ice, Christopher," The older man scolds, a harsh and threatening point towards his direction with an icy glare lit the fear of the usually composed songwriter. "This shitty excuse of a song isn't doing you any good. I tell you to follow the correct formula, you do it!" The older man slams his fists on the desk after his statement, making the younger one flinch.

"But sir, the identity-" He is immediately cut off with a chortle.

"All that identity bullshit you're aiming for is gonna be your downfall. We have a brand and you being here is threatening it." He swipes his hair backwards before groaning frustratedly, "I got you here because you promised good work, I suggest sticking to it. Your dreams can fucking wait." He clicks his tongue, fixing his desk back frustratedly after his outburst.

"Don't just stand there looking all pathetic! Go back to work or don't bother working back here!"

"Look on the bright side, hyung. Least he didn't shatter your USB drive and tear up your notes." Changbin offers the slightest bit of comfort at a defeated lump he calls his friend, Chan, on the couch of their shared ampartment. The two of them, and one other guy named Jisung, had been renting the place for real cheap, it being the best deal with the work being offered to them at their current predicament anyway.

"That's not the point, Bin. This is the nth time I've been closed to getting fired, if this keeps up, I'm back to a freaking office job." His eyes drift around the room before sighing deeply.

"Lucky for you, I don't want that to happen, hyung. We'll find a way to get through this. If not with your boss, then your writing." Changbin says, resting a hand on his friend's shoulder with a soft smile.

Chris offers an unenthusiastic nod, Changbin's words seem awfully nice but it's not a solid action he needs to take at the moment. To be honest, Chris wasn't sure what he plans on doing. Changbin and Han don't seem put together in their setup but at least they had much more of a stable situation thanks to the artists they're writing for and the many others who were anticipating their scores and composition. Meanwhile Chris, despite starting so young at the industry, has somehow, never really made a mark with his own craft.

Chris believed in the "jack of all trades", hoping that one of the genres he'd make would spark interest, but with almost 100 songs unrecorded, only 2 were really officially put on his credits, and haven't been hitting much with the revenue he'd hoping it would enable.

The apartment door creaks open, snapping the two's heads towards the source, the figure behind it being their other roommate carrying what appears to be a large Domino's pizza.

"Changbin hyung told me, so, I thought it'd be nice we have something good for once."

Laughter and glasses clinking echoed the earlier gloomy atmosphere of the trio's apartment, now complete for the day, it felt the three could unwind after everything that had happened in their lives.

"And then he said, "You're on thin ice, Christopher!". I almost shit my pants, it was so fucking embarrassing and no one but us was even there!" Chris groans as he recalls earlier's events, running a hand through his face while the other two laughed at his state.

"I remember when we had to watch Young K hyung get scolded like that, he almost tore up his work if Sungjin hyung didn't hold his shoulder. I guess it comes to the most talented of people." Han shrugs before finishing the last piece of his slice. Changbin nods in agreement, a small laugh on his lips before sipping on his rootbeer. Chris sighs, slouching on his chair as he begins contemplating about his next move to either get noticed with his own work or follow the formula he was given to stay in the workplace.

Han notices the sudden change and jokts slightly, an idea striking in his head. Changbin notices the younger and scrunches his eyebrows questioning his movements with just his eyes. A telepathic communication, if that was possible for the duo, even. Chris was none the wiser, too busy in his own head finding means and inspiration to write what he was asked for.

Finding a client outside of the company was hard, finding a new company altogether was even harder.

"Hey, Hyung. By any chance do you still have any samples you could give me?" Han cuts through the silence and looks up at the eldest with Changbin wondering what was going to happen. Chris snaps back to reality and adjusts his posture at his youngest's query.

"Yeah, my portfolio's updated. Why do you ask?" Chris is at the edge of his seat, wondering what the younger one had in mind.

"Well, there's this pop artist of ours who wants to try out new genres on their upcoming full album. They write too, but had asked me if I can find more people to help with composition and engineering since the old one had just been laid off." He offers, scrolling through his phone about something Chris couldn't see.

"A pop artist? I mean, that's what I'm basically writing for—"

"Oh no, no." Han cuts him off immediately in a panic, "She DOESN't want more pop sounds in the album. Maybe RnBs or Ballads or Rock."

Chris' had gone through a few emotions before relief washed over at the suggested genres. "You had me scared there, I thought it was cancelled before it had even begun. But, I think I can do that, I don't have any current clients and my boss would probably love to hear if I'm part of a team, officially." Chris smiles, his dimples showing, eager to hear about the work he might finally be a part of.

"Perfect! Don't worry about your boss, I'll ask the manager to send a formal letter, and if needed, I'll even approach them myself."

"You really want to go back to his office?"

"Not in a million years, but for you, hyung, I'll try."

"All right, all right, this calls for a celebration, so why don't we head to the balcony and ACTUALLY get some beer?" Changbin bears witness to the exchange before finally inserting himself to offer the other two another chance to unwind.

It was there that Chris realized how lucky he was with Han and Changbin, age was a small, crossable barrier for them, however, their deep love and affection for each other was just evident with everything they did together and so on.

"Y/N? Your team is here to discuss about the songs." A kind, older figure taps you on the shoulder. Your head leaning on your hand, trying so hard not to fall asleep on the company cafeteria. You were trying your hardest to come up with more songs for the album, but none of them hitting the right way that would go well with your title track and album theme.

You turn back to see your manager, their concerned face looking at you as they offer a hand. "I love that you're trying to write, but you haven't had sleep for two days now. Deadline isn't until in 2 months and besides, I trust Han with finding composers for you."

"I'm sorry, Unnie... It's just that, I trusted Hyunjae so much, he gets the sound I'm looking for..." You whine just a bit, your hands covering your face, almost tearing up again.

"I know, but you used "trusted" for a reason. What he did to them cost him his job and his freedom, thankfully, and you're lucky he didn't have the guts to get you or anybody else." Your manager tried to offer comfort, but with the news about one of the people in the company, they had gotten him kicked out, lucky for you and also a sort of curse. Now, you're catching up to 4 songs that haven't been completed and another 5 songs without scores.

"GOD, Why are they such dicks!?" Y/N groaned frustratedly before immediately trying to calm down. "Well, I hope Han found someone overnight." You said with a hint of sarcasm. As you and your manager walked towards the studio, your feet seemed to have been more dragging about wanting to enter the room. You sigh heavily and compose yourself before turning the door knob and slowly pushing the door to get a peek inside.

Only having 3 people inside, Han, one of your managers' staff and a person you haven't met before. Personally, anyway. Christopher was the name that flashed in your head when you saw him, slightly doubting about the accuracy, but you know him thanks to the fact that he was been in the company for quite a while, maybe working with a different set of divisions, but anyway.

"Y/N! Manager noona! You guys are just in time. The others haven't arrived yet, but I did find you a new lyricist and sound engineer!" Han happily announced, presenting the slightly taller man beside him. Despite the duo lacking in the height department, which you were too, he had the aura of someone who could possibly loom over you if you stood next to him. He commanded the room, but didn't demand the attention. He was firm, but his small smile said otherwise.

You'd think you would fear him, but you could only stare and eye him in awe with how he radiated himself in the room.

"This is Christopher Bang. He's from Division C1. Wrote a smoking formal letter to his boss and he was set and ready." Han bragged, pumping his fists like a kid with enthusiasm surging through him.

"You guys can call me Chan, it's my tag, but Chris is also fine." He offered a handshake towards you two and you couldn't help but notice the man's build. You didn't want to stare for too long, but that was a little late when your manager nudged you on the side, popping your imagination bubble just in time to listen to Han.

"We have a few sample here with us we'd love for you to here and the lyrics sheet for some of the scores you're still filling up." Han says, asking both of them to sit down as Chris immediately got to work, your manager sits on the couch beside his staff as you were asked to sit in between the two. Han started explaining all the technicals, hooking up the music to the board and everything while Chris was watching and anticipating behind you with his hands clasped together.

"Just so you know, all of these are written and demonstrated by Chan hyung himself." Han wiggled his eyebrows teasingly as your eyes shifted towards Chris with a sweet smile. From there, Chris thought that the anxiety of an artist like you hearing his songs would be the reason to wrack his nerves, but, with the way your smile comforted him in such a situation, there was probably no reason for him to worry. His heart beating fast was no pressure from the songs, but more of how pretty you looked when you smiled towards him.

Night fell and the last pieces of the today's last song was recorded and readied. At least 9 out of 15 songs for the album were finished, the rest had edits to be made before final approval, Han and the rest were just eager to get it done. You were too, considering that the Chris and Han were adamant to give the best results, had been the kindest during recording sessions to aid you and your singing.

Other trainings had to been in the following days and your next recording wouldn't be until in 4 days.

"Miss? Any final edits you'd like to make before we put this in the folders?" Chris turns his swivel chair towards you, your manager had entrusted you to Han and Chris as they had other scheduling matters to complete. "Can I hear the layering for 'XO?' I feel like I went to high here and not enough here." You pointed out on the monitor. Chris nodded, fixing the sounds and layering of your voice and the instrumental before lettng the track play once more.

"I love that! Thank you! Also, it's Y/N, you don't have to be so formal, Chan-ssi."

"You say that, but you just called me, mister." The eldest one pouts, earning laughter from both you and Han. The younger man stands up, groaning and moaning about his strained muscles. "Well, I'm gonna head out. I'll finish the track later at dawn, I just wanna nap for a bit." Han admits, slinging his bag on his shoulder.

"Okay, I'll finish these tracks first then head back." Chris notifies the younger, concern washing over Y/N.

"Are you sure? You don't have to finish both all at once. You might not get much sleep." You say looking at Chan worriedly. He reciprocates the concern with a gummy smile, "I'm fine, I work best at night anyway."

Han bids his goodbye to the both of you, closing the door behind him, leaving the two of you in slight awkward silence. The only thing reflecting in the walls is Chris' mouse clicking and your slight humming.

"You should get some rest, Y/N-ssi." Chris cuts the silence. Deep down, he didn't really want you to leave, but that would be a bit selfish and stalker-y of him.

"I'm fine. I want to listen to the drafts anyway." You say im earnest, sittiny beside him with your legs crossed, watching him work.

Chris wasn't sure what was happening, but the silence of the room felt deafening more than he opted for. His peripheral vision would catch you eyeing the soundboard and he wanted nothing more than to talk about it more and more. His heart was back to its fast thumping it almost felt unhealthy. He shifts in his seat to keep himself at bay, worried that if given the chance, he'd fuck it all up if it means getting to know the Jeong Y/N.

"I'm surprised you agreed to do this, Chan-ssi." Chris slowed down his work to look at you. Your face looking up at him, which he hadn't anticipated would be closer towards his. His heart raced in his chest with the way you stared at him, (He should get that checked.)

"H-Huh?"

"Well, I mean... I'm no big artist and you seem to know a lot about all of this. You've written so many songs, so I thought that you wouldn't want anyone lesser than Beyoncé to write for." You shrugged, earning a chuckle from the man.

"Bold of you to assume Beyoncé would even want me." He murmured. You giggled at his reply then crossed your arms.

"People would love to have you! Especially me!" You blurt out of the blue, not realizing how it might have sounded towards the other. A blush creeps on your face at the realization.

"I mean, to have you work with them!" You clarified, but Chris had other plans. His ears turned a shade of red as he awkwardly laughed about the statement. You looked so cute either way his heart was about to explode.

"One day, you'll see me in one of her credits, "The Married Women, Produced and Written by Chan,"..." He said, swiping one of his hands in the air. You laughed at the sheer stupidity of the choke, but somehow, it made the room feel lighter, the uneasiness and awkwardness from earlier had lifted as you shared more about each other, the conversation shifting from Beyoncé to Rock bands to Video Games, and so on, until the clock reflected 2 AM.

Chris was still going strong, just cold water and a can of half a Redbull by his side. Meanwhile you, the ever so talkative from earlier had crashed in the couch with a thin cardigan as cover. Chris had known about the current situation, and had eyed you since earlier about your condition. He wasn't a fool not to notice the baggy eyes and the sluggish speaking when midnight struck. Chris was on the last song, but his mind was on you. For one, he didn't want you to wake up just yet, opting to surprise you with the songs being finished, the other, looking at your sleeping figured somehow made him just as peaceful, knowing how you were getting the rest you needed.

Weird. He had only spent a few hours with you, but he worried like he's known you for a lifetime. He is caught off guard when the studio door creaks open and in came a familiar figure.

"Hyung? You're back here again?" Han groggily asked as he stepped in, yet to notice the sleeping figure on the couch.

Chris turned around fully, putting an index finger on his lips and pointing towards your sleeping figure. Han's eyes went wide at your presence, meaning you had never left as well.

"Did you two just not leave the room?"

"We did. To buy Redbull at the cafeteria."

Han facepalmed at his answer, grabbing a swivel and sitting down next to Chris. This causes you to stir awake. You blink the tiredness away and notice two figures now present at the room, you shift to sit upright and adjust your vision.

"Han? You're back? What time is it anyway?" You asked, rubbing your eyes tiredly and yawning.

"It's already 2 AM. You should head back to your dorm, you have a schedule later." Han points as he turns around to face you.

"Is Chan-ssi done with the songs?" You asked, standing up and wobbling toward the duo.

Han nudges Chris' side and smiled widely, "I'm gonna take over. Hyung will walk back with you." Chris choke on his Redbull, coughing at the sudden mention of his name.

"M-Me?" He manages to wheeze in between the coughing fit. You look at him and try to offer comfort, but Chris stops you and his small "I'm fine's" was his indication.

"Yes, Binnie-hyung told me to come get you, we can finish the other songs before the next recording, we have 2 songs left, you have the others in the team, we can manage." Han speaks quickly, pushing Chris slightly out of his seat to which the older has no choice but to oblige.

Chris awkwardly chuckles as a blush creeps at the embarrassing moment as he begins to pack up. You smile and nod, fixing up your own stuff. You don't mind spending a few more minutes with Chris anyway.

After cleaning up, Han waves goodbye, not before whispering something towards Chris which earns him a pinch on the arm. The younger screamed in pain and surrender as he pouted towards the older. You giggled at their interaction before saying goodbye and good night to the other before heading out.

The walk to the elevator felt short, and for a while, you wished it had been longer. The elevator dings, the double doors opening as you two step inside and press the ground floor button. You grab your hat and hair tie and slinging your cardigan back on again. Chris only side eyes you and smiles softly to himself, despite the words from Han earlier echoing in his head. It was so stupid but it made his whole body shudder and heat up.

"My dorm is nearby, but I still need to be cautious." You say, wearing your black mask as additional cover.

"The more you wear stuff to cover your face, the more you look small." Chris quips at you, he earns a playful punch on the arm from you.

"That's so mean!"

"What? It's cute!" He blurts out, earning a wide-eyed stare from you this time. Chris registers his words and he looks away quickly, covering his mouth. "I-I mean, you look cute!"

That helped his situation, sure.

You purse your lips, fighting back a giggle as you both grow flustered at each other. Chris leans on the wall with his forehead, murmuring his words as he tries to gain control.

"What I meant to say was—"

"I think you're cute too." You say, not letting him anyway.

If red was a person, right now, it would be Christopher Bang. He stared into space, the words registering in his head, and maybe, just maybe, he didn't mishear. Gibberish was the best Chris could speak right now, and you, well, you might as well jump to whatever floor was available right now to get out of this situation.

The elevator ride took forever, and the silence felt heavy. It didn't seem like it was awkward, but no one was speaking anything, neither one wanted to say anything.

Chris nibbled his lower lip, anxiety creeping in, he wanted to say something, but he also didn't want to say anything. Meanwhile your fingers found each other interesting, it felt as if nothing could possibly make this ride worse. Until you heard a certain someone suck in his breath.

"I think..." He started speaking, "I think you're really cool, Y/N. I didn't want to sound like a creep when you first stepped in the room, but, you're so much fun to be around with." He spoke, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. You noticed his arm flexed at that action, and you suddenly wished you didn't (actually you did want to see it, you just can't focus as much now.)

"I mean, we don't have to do anything just yet, being a friend of yours is already worth it in itself." He smiled, his dimples showing...

Wait, he has dimples?! Why haven't you noticed that?

"Are you cool with that?" He asked, offering a hand towards you.

It's the same way when he offered his hand earlier to shake when you first met, it was more lax though, offering something more casual. You never thought that this was on your bingo card for the year, but here it is.

The worst thing is, you could have said anything better, but instead chose to say,

"S-Sure!" And you kinda regretted it, wishing you had said more.

Something changed in those months you continued working for the album, your photoshoots were more inspired and your rehearsals were easier. Was it because your "good friend" Chris was there to visit you. His reasons differed from 'talking to you about the outro song' and 'if you wanted to get more Redbull and get Han in on it.'

At that point, your manager didn't even need to question him, all she asked was being cautious about actions. Which wasn't hard, despite butterflies blooming in your stomach more and more, you and Chris had a fantastic dynamic without crossing boundaries. Maybe a bit with all his visits, but even Han joins him so, what's the harm in that?

Two months came by and your album was in its releasing phase, pictures and promotions had been lined up after months of hard work with the writing team, and you know it's still not over. Even with Han working on his next client, he managed to find time to see you, Chris, on the other hand, had never once missed an event, even if it was just through his phone.

You and Chris were practically inseparable by this point, but, something, and you know exactly what that is, lingers in you about the relationship you have with the guy.

Your manager approached you with a polite smile as you're getting cleared for the day after your final filming day. Given that the release is in 3 weeks, you're thankful your manager is able to give you space to yourself before release day and promotions officially begin, which was the most hectic time for you.

Chris, just outside the venue like he always was, had been waiting for you to finish. He basically has a hall pass to enter the shoot, but he doesn't abuse it. At this point, everyone, from your division at least, knows him, even if he was just called, the songwriter from Division C1.

"I'm starting to think you like picking me up from work, Mr. Bang." You tease as his figure approaches you, opting to help carry your stuff as people from the venue begin to head out as well.

"You know me so well, Ms. Jeong." He replies with a smirk. Handing him the bigger and sling the other on your shoulder, you start storytelling about everything that had happened on set, an eager Chris happy to listen to everything, taking little notes in his head for details he'd love to remember.

On a normal drive, he would drop you off in your dorm, with both of you usually cloaked with baggy clothes to become unidentifiable, and on some days, he invites you to his apartment, sometimes with his roommate/s being there, sometimes just the two of you. Today, it was the latter. Having both Han and Changbin gone for the evening freed the both of you, him mostly, from any teasing about whatever was going on betwee you and Chris.

"Make yourself at home, Y/N-ie." He invites you in, the door swung open as the smell of cinnamon wafted through the air. You're used to smelling this whenever you were around since Chris had learned you loved the scent of cinnamon, you were never sure how he found out, maybe one of your many, many conversations, but you didn't mind, you were hoping that the other boys didn't mind the smell each time.

You flop on the couch, looking around, somehow, the more you visited here, the more the place got radiant. Maybe it was Han's, Changbin's, or Chris' doing in adding more furnishing to make the place more cozy, but it was definitely working.

You noticed on the coffee table Chris' laptop, you don't pay much attention to it, since you don't like snooping that much, but the blinking kind of always attracts you to press it, but you resist, especially when Chris comes to the living room with cups of warm tea.

"Thanks. I would say I want iced coffee, but Unnie would throw me to Mars if I broke rest." You said, sighing at the memory the first time you did it. Chris chuckles as he sits next to you, taking a sip of his own.

"Yeah, I get that, we mostly request other artists to do the same thing before recording sessions." He shrugs, "But you know, sometimes it can't be helped."

"Have you gotten any new clients with Division C1?" You ask out of the blue, your hands cupping the mug as you take a long sip, waiting for his answer.

Chris gives a polite smile before setting his drink down. "I guess Hannie didn't tell you, but I asked for a division and department transfer." He said, leaning on the backrest of the couch.

"I thought that C1 would help me grow as a composer, ya know? But uh, turns out the Division head hired me so he can use me as face value since he has consistently had a number of complaints, only reason why he wasn't getting fired was because he had backup in HR." Chris told nonchalantly, for some reason.

You listened, mouth agape, never expecting these things to be happening behind everything, kind of feeling bad about it the more you think about the events.

"So, had a little help from your manager and get hooked with a double agent, basically, in HR to release the complaints that were "pushed aside" to the Executives, basically." He shrugs, his hands supporting his head, "You can say I was a lowkey Karen, but if no one was going to tell them, he'd basically run the division scott-free. They're looking managers within the division to promote as Division head, and I'm planning a department transfer to talents."

You look at him confused, "You want to train idols and other upcoming artists?" You asked with an eyebrow raised. His nod was enthusiastic, the smile evident on his lips.

"I've been here for so long, I have professional training in vocals, it'd be nice to help kids know about their talents." He replies. His eyes find yours eventually, a gummier smile forming in his face making you giggle a bit.

"What about your songwriting?" You asked rather genuinely, head tilted in slight confusion.

"You don't have to worry about that, my songwriting is still pretty much active. I'm just waiting for your boss to approve my transfer to Division AE3 and I'm basically all yours!" Maybe you misheard him on the last part, but the thought that you and Chris might actually be working together more often was a daydream come true.

"So what you're saying, Mr. Bang is... you're mine?" You playfully bite back at his teasing, there are moments where statements like these, especially made by THE Christopher Bang himself are intentional, and he knows he's playing with fire once you're in the mood to taunt back.

Even after knowing these things about you, he still feels the heat creeping up from his chest and manifesting in his ears in shades of beet red. You always chuckle at his antics and words since he could never formulate the same amount of teasing back again to create banter.

Nevertheless, it was nice to know that you had someone like Christopher by your side, maybe in times like these you don't need to put such a heavy responsibility on what you two shoulde be. You both know you're practically in love, fanfiction has told you it's a friends to lovers, and maybe, that's just what you need, a nice quiet moment with someone whom you share peace with.

"Hey, Y/N? Can I... show you something?"

Hi! It's Cece! This fic happened because of a weird daydream I had, but I hadn't expected it would be this long! If you've made it this far, thank you so much for reading!

Until the next!

Consider following for more upcoming stories! Masterlist will be up soon! Thank you so much!

#fiction #stray kids fanfic #stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids bang chan #bang chan #straykids #fluff #skz x reader #skz fluff #skz imagines

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rawchae · 4 months ago

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The Ghosts of Us.

Non-Idol!Lee Know/Fem!Reader (ft. Non Idol!Hyunjin)

Content: Angst (Hurt/No Comfort), Very Minimal Fluff

Word Count: 1.8k

Author's Note: I don't know, it's been on my mind, I wanted to get it out for a bit and hurt my heart.

Summary: What defines your relationship with a person when 15 years of it couldn't save what once was?

Content Warning: Someone gets burnt (by accident), nothing else that I can think of.

What defines a relationship with someone when 15 years of memories are so easily disposed?

Every year of the past recounted plights of pain, hurt, laughter, tears, and rage, but why was it so easy for you to suddenly forget them all?

'Did you truly love him at all?'

That was the thought that lingered in Minho's mind as he stared at your figure in the distance. Hands interlocked with one of his dearest friends, Hyunjin. Your eyes gleamed with the same happiness he usually saw whenever you looked at Minho before.

Eyes sparkling like stars in the sky. He could trace a map of a constellation with how much they gleamed at Hyunjin. But then again, that's all he can do. Reminisce at the fact that your gaze was no longer in his direction, no longer did they widen or glimmer because of him or his voice, touch, presence... anything.

He's nonchalant as he notices you slide your free hand on Hyunjin's shoulder. The man turns his head towards you immediately, his other hand placed atop yours as you two conversed away into your own little world. Minho noticed your lips move but could not form any coherent words from it. Hyunjin squeezes your palm and a soft smile is etched on his lips, he lifts your hand to kiss the knuckles, once, twice, and maybe just an extra one to make you giggle.

Minho knew you were ticklish almost head to toe. But he neither spoke that to Hyunjin or anyone else, he thought those were tiny facts he would get to keep for himself. He also thought about how it irritates him that someone else shared the knowledge about how you liked your coffee in the morning or whenever you were just simply ordering in a cafe, even the fact that he shares the knowledge with Hyunjin that you don't like polyester because it makes you itch sometimes.

Minho hated the fact that Hyunjin knew your favorite color, favorite food, favorite trip destination, favorite animal and all the mundane things you both used to share.

15 years encapsulated all the good, the bad, the beautiful, and the toxic of your relationship with Minho.

At age 12, you would get to meet a tall, brunet, feline-loving boy because of a small argument over an eraser during class. You never really understood him and his weird antics. But he was so endearing and secretly a kind-hearted lad. By that time, despite your constant bickering, you are accustomed to him and your days with the boy, it was part of life to have Minho and you to him.

By 17, you were already checking out colleges and the degrees you'd apply to. Minho had been eyeing culinary arts, and you're right by him, just... in the architecture building, that is. He had been so supportive of your dream that he almost forgot to check his college acceptance letters when it had arrive, anticipating yours heavily.

You both managed to get your chosen degrees, while you were slowly turning into the young adults the two of you never thought you would become. You still had your youthful hearts, of course, never missing a beat of each other's drum. Minho decides to join the college's dance team where he would become quite known for, meeting a few people you became close to as well.

Despite the popularity Minho was garnering, he only had eyes for you, which had resulted in you two starting to date mid-college, the tension thicker than both of you had realized as you grew up. It seemed like forever was in the horizon. Graduating with honors in your batch, planning a whole life ahead, even getting so close as to living together in a cute apartment after the graduation just in the city.

But...

Something was haunting him, and Minho had a harder and harder time brushing it off. One day, he noticed how things started to diverge, you and Minho already had different plans in life. Minho had a much more stable career now, wanting to settle down after job-searching and switching for years. He had garnered enough experiences to be guaranteed as head chef in a well-known restaurant. Meanwhile, you weren't there, yet. The world was in an unfinished blueprint for you, measurements were wonky and nothing was in its place. You wanted to see more of it and graph it all out.

And because of that, the gap between grew wider... and wider... you were next to each other in bed at night, probably even cuddled so close in a tight embrace, but you felt like oceans apart. His head raced with the thought of a kid, maybe two, a nice house, and adding one more cat into his soon-to-be bigger family. You were thinking of Sweden, or UK, maybe even a nice apartment in Finland, with the thought of being able to travel the world and check it all out with an adventurous spirit.

From those distances, arguments started to boil. There was only one person stirring the pot, but each spill still caused enough waste, maybe even a few burns if mishandled.

"Minho! This is such a huge opportunity! We can go live in Amsterdam for a few months then shift to Venice. Can you imagine city or town-hopping and getting to know so many places, and yeah, I get that it's so far away from your kitchen, but maybe we can work something out? What do you think?"

Minho gripped the ladel tighter. Stirring the stew in the pot as his mind fogged with too many things.

"If they need you, they most likely have the branch in the cities! We can map it out and work with what we have—" A metal object clanks onto the stove-top, Minho's almost nonchalant reaction as his skin burned with hot stew spilled on his bare hand and a bit on his legs.

"Baby! Are you okay? Hey, tell me what's going on..." You say, rushing to his side, turning off the burner as you navigate the injuries, helping him wash his hands to rid of the hot stew on his skin, and cleaning up the slight mess on his shirt and pants.

"I don't... I don't know how to work like this anymore..." Minho murmurs, pulling himself away as he takes a step back, gaze focusing on you as you stare back at him with wide eyes.

"Wh-What do you mean...?" Your voice comes out small, almost shaky, not wanting what might come next.

"Let's break up." Minho says straightforward, his hands tapping on the countertop as he feels the sting of the burns on his skin. You're confused, taking a step back and bumping right on the marbled counter, you try to understand what could have possibly sparked this whole thing, but Minho had already turned on his heels and made way for himself to pack up and go.

You stand in the already humid kitchen with no thoughts in your head forming but all the tears you tucked away falling. They feel so hot on your cheeks, you're not sure how much you've wanted to tear up like that, and for a moment, you thought this was just a tired Minho speaking.

But when eight years passed after the incident and Minho nowhere nearly made the effort to make conversation with you again in any possible way, you thought, 15 years seemed like a lot for some person. Suddenly, the numbers blurred, forming a fog and a shadow of a man. Luckily, within those eight years of hoping, you found Hwang Hyunjin, an amazing painter and a fellow architect with whom you shared more interests with than you thought.

Your four years, and counting, with Hyunjin was ultimately way better than the 15 years you kept hidden. You have someone who cares deeply about you, someone who's not afraid to speak about his emotions, and you know exactly what you two need in the relationship. So when your friends decided to hang out and organizing some sort of pre-reunion event, you notice the man staring at you with almost uncertain and deeply depressed eyes.

You nudge closer to Hyunjin who happily accepts the warmth, gently touching and squeezing your hand as he attentively replies to the conversation then turns to look at you for your wellbeing.

You notice the other man's stare after a small talk with Hyunjin and accidentally lock eyes at the moment your boyfriend looked. Your eyes go wide at him, but shrink back down to an almost half-lidded and uninterested stare, you know his name, Minho, and you remember that face. That's it.

You don't feel anything as he looks at you, his eyes light up so slightly at the little bit of hope you try to set in his mind when he notices you shift in your position, but then look away as if nothing had happened and went to entertaining another colleague.

That was the turning point. The glimmer of hope was crushed into smallerpieces, despite expecting that reaction from you after everything.

Suddenly, Minho realized how much of this was his fault, he had broken up with the girl who was more than willing to care for him and notice every little detail. He misses the way you lit up when he only started to make beef wellington and you were the first one to always taste the batches he would make on a random day of the week, he barely has the energy to cook it anymore. He hates how he's no longer updated about what you're watching or what music you're listening to because you loved using the audio setup to blast music in the apartment and have random dance parties in the evening.

He wasn't sure who was truly selfish all those years ago.

To Minho, the decision to break up wasn't bad, how he handled it was. His decision to never pick up your calls and ignore your messages was the shitty aftermath, and this is the price he pays for it.

To you, never noticing how Minho had sacrificed so much was your regret. You never wanted to hurt him that way or disregard his dreams. You wanted to apologize even if it was a little late, but you don't want to chase him anymore if his stubborness was your barrier now.

You both had to accept the fact that 15 years loomed only in the shape of photographs stored in albums inside huge boxes or tucked in drawers neither of you opened. 15 years may have haunted you years ago, but Minho's only noticing the signs now. He forgets that this time, you had finished with grieving what once was for you two, and Minho had to watch you get your life back together while he slowly realizes he had never grieved on your relationship.

Oceans became galaxies-wide, and you were okay with that, but not Minho. To him, you are still part of the ghosts of his past.

Hi! It's Cece! If you made it until here, congratulations! You've read one of my first fanfics. I don't know why I wrote angst as my first, but I love angst stories. This was inspired by, I think, while listening to break up songs.

I cannot give you an exact playlist, but I think the biggest inspo would be Rhys Lewis' No Right To Love You, because, well, just listen to the song. Consider following for more upcoming stories! Masterlist will be up soon! Thank you so much!

#fiction #stray kids #stray kids fanfic #stray kids minho #skz lee know #skz x reader #lee know x reader #lee know x y/n #angst #angst no comfort #I don't know what I wrote

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