red-depressive - Tumblr blog

[red-depressive]

A lot of the positive mental health posts talk about how you have survived [x] and are still here proving you can make it further. This ignores the distinct possibility that mental illness or you yourself might have placed you in a terrible situation or screwed up your life.

That's where I am, in a personal hell at least partially created by myself.

[red-depressive]

“I want to sleep all day and night (i.e., not live but not quite die)…”

— Anne Sexton - From A Self-Portrait In Letters

[red-depressive]

[red-depressive]

[red-depressive]

suffocation, crystal castles c. 2010

[red-depressive]

Just once, I wish that when I woke up, I would not dread everything I am.....

[red-depressive]

CLOUDY AS LIKE YOUR MIND

[red-depressive]

The thoughts in my head are too loud I want them to stop I don't want to think anymore

[red-depressive]

[red-depressive]

kinda wanna scream. kinda wanna cry. kinda wanna sleep. kinda just wanna disappear

[red-depressive]

I’m tired of wishing I was dead.

[red-depressive]

I wish....

I wish I were better....

I wish I were better than I am....

[red-depressive]

When you've lost what you thought was yourself and now you don't know who you are....

[red-depressive]

Please just let me sleep my life away....

I don't want to live another day....

[red-depressive]

I’m so tired. I’m completely drained and can never be filled up again. I just want to go to sleep forever.

[red-depressive]

I don’t wanna live but I also don’t want to die. All I wanna do is self destruct and make myself suffer , but I also want to find comfort and joy in this life.

[red-depressive]

This weird feeling comes around again. The guilt and shame of being alive. The discomfort of living.