sarocasm

[sarocasm]

cool aspec safe space, hey btw just checking, are aroallos allowed to talk about their experiences openly in here or will you cry and throw up and run away

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can a minor identify as aroallo or is that wrong

no, nobody feels sexual attraction until the arbitrary age at which their government decides a citizen is old enough to make their own medical and financial decisions

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I do not understand why, when I talk about sexual relationships or wanting to have non-romantic sex in general, people feel the need to respond with stuff like "as long as you don’t lead people on / trick them, you’re fine", "as long as you’re open about what you want, it’s okay", or even "as long as you don’t force people to have sex with you, you’re fine."

No one would respond to a person talking about wanting a romantic relationship with "well as long you don’t abuse your partner, you’re fine" because no one would just immediately jump to that assumption.

But hearing me talk about sexual relationships and immediately thinking I might want to trick and abuse, even rape people, and need to be reminded that that is wrong, is somehow seen as normal? Why?

Just. Maybe don’t say stuff like that? Of course everything said is true. I’m aware raping people is wrong, I don’t need to be constantly reminded of the fact that people see me as a rapist-in-waiting for being AroAllo, or as a whore who leads the poor alloros who just want to have a romantic relationship on and tricks them into having non-romantic sex with me (because obviously no one would have sex with me if I were open about my intentions).

Why do people feel the need to say these things every time sex (and especially non-romantic sex) is mentioned? Why do people assume the worst possible things, to then say "well as long as you’re not a horrible piece of shit, you’re fine ig"?

Or am I just reading too much into it? Am I overreacting?

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omg cute couples post! tbh the monogamy thing would never work for me or my partner but this is cute. honestly monogamy is just like NOT something i could ever do but that's great. i hope you're both happy! personally because of MY boundaries i'd cave my own fucking skull in before trying monogamy but that's sooooo cute for you different strokes for different folks ❤️ i mean i've just had such bad experiences with monogamy that the idea disgusts and upsets me but it's so great that you only fuck each other i think that's beautiful, love is love ❤️ your relationship is just as valid as a poly one even if it upsets and frightens me, i'm glad you're somehow able to feel loved like that ❤️

[sarocasm]

Total aces: 55

Total aros: 36 1/2 (counting the Shadowhunters one as 1/2 due to the show un-aroing the character)

Confirmed aces: 41

Confirmed aros: 21 1/2

Aroaces: 35 1/2

Alloaros: 1

Alloaces (& possibly non-SAM aces): 19 1/2

List/ Collage with A-Spec Characters: canon confirmed, and popular headcanons

Colours:

Canon confirmed: blue

popular headcanon/ speculation: orange

Alastor, Hazbin Hotel: ace, aro

Senku Ishigami, Dr. Stone: ace, aro

Vi Moradi, Star Wars: ace, aro

Victor Vale, Vicious: ace, biromantic

Spongebob: ace

Kirby: ace, aro, non-binary

the Knight, Hollow Knight: agender, ace, aro

Todd Chavez, BoJack Horseman: ace

Georgia Warr, Loveless: ace, aro, aego?

Jughead Jones, Archie: ace

Doomguy/ Dooomslayer: ace

Seiji Maki, Bloom into you: ace, aro, aegoromantic?

Monkey D. Luffy, One Piece: ace, aro

Connor Hawke, DC Comics: ace, alloromantic

Perry the platypus: ace, aro

Kusuo Saiki, Disastrous life of Saiki K.: ace, aro

Yelena Belova, Marvel: ace, aro

Izaya Orihara, Durara: ace, aro

Daryl Dixon, the Walking Dead: ace

Keyleth, Critical Role: demisexual

Neil Josten, Foxhole Court: demisexual, demiromantic

Isaac Henderson, Heartstopper: ace, aro

Vernestra Rwoh, Star Wars: ace, aro

Light Yagami, Death Note: ace, aro

Caduceus Clay, Critical Role: ace, aro

Murderbot, Murderbot Diaries: ace, aro, genderless

Jonathan "Jon" Simms, Magnus Archives: ace, biromantic

Shouto Todoroki, Boku no Hero Academia: ace, aro

Lilith Clawthorne, Owl House: ace, aro

Bill Cypher, Gravity Falls: ace, aro, agender

Ezperanza "Spooner" Cruz, Legends of Tomorrow: ace

Nadia Van Dyne/ the Wasp, Marvel: ace, aro, quoiromantic

Peridot, Stephen Universe: ace, aro

Gwenpool, Marvel: ace, aro

Frieren: ace, aro/ aspec

Joffrey Baratheon, Game of Thrones: ace, aro

Sherlock Holmes, Arthur Conan Doyle: ace, aro

Lord Varys, Game of Thrones: ace, aro

Reyna Avila Ramirez-Arellano, Percy Jackson: ace, aro

Son Goku, Dragonball: ace

10th Doctor, Doctor Who (David Tennant): ace, panromantic

11th Doctor, Doctor Who (Matt Smith): ace

Sakuko Kodama, Koisenu Futari: ace, aro

Satoru Takahashi, Koisenu Futari: ace, aro

Felicity Montague, Lady's guide to petticoats and piracy: ace, aro

Jasnah Kholin, Stormlight Archive: ace, heteroromantic

Loth, Priory of the Orange Tree: grey-ace

Tané, Priory of the Orange Tree: ace, aro

Adèle, Baker Thief: demisexual, bi

Claire/ Claude, Baker Thief: aro (aroallo!), genderfluid

Sandry, Circle of Magic: ace

Ling Chan, the Diviners: ace, lesbian

Nancy Whitman, Every Heart a Doorway: ace, alloromantic

Kel, Protector of the Small: ace, aro

Natalie, Natural History of Dragons: ace, aro

Raphael Santiago, Shadowhunters: Cassandra Clare: ace, aro (In the show only ace)

Please note that I took most of my information from online, and I didn't personally read/ watch everything, so there may be some mistakes. Also, some of the not-canon characters are very likely aspec, but just not confirmed. And especially if they say/ do really obviously aro/ ace stuff, I wasn't sure if it's enough to put them in the "confirmed" category. (e.g. Saiki literally said he isn't attracted to anyone regardless of gender, and never wants to be in a relationship. But there are still people who doubt his aroace-ness. (And at this point I don't see how it could be anything but aphobia, to deny the mere possibility of him being aroace so vehemently lol.) ) Also: Sadly, I couldn't find good aro-allo characters except Claire/ Claude from "baker thief". There is tons of good a-spec representation in that book (also more side characters that I didn't mention here), but I couldn't really find any fan-art. So then I just slapped the entire book cover on the collage.

[sarocasm]

Bot hunt? Just scroll past the bot spam! Queer tags get misused all the time, you don't gotta make such a drama about it. It's just a tumblr tag. Don't you have any real problems to deal with??

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"Oh you're alloromantic? But what if you meet someone one day who puts you off romance forever? I think you should put your life on hold just in case that happens."

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Imagine if people couldn't talk about lesbians without constantly bringing up gay men as well. It's never just lesbians, it's always "lesbians/gay men".

There are basically no resources discussing lesbianism as its own thing, lesbians are always paired with gay men. In fact, resources for and about gay men overshadow lesbian resources to the point where it's pretty much impossible to learn about lesbians without first researching gay men. How many lesbians never find out they're lesbians bc they don't have any reason to look up info on gay men?

All the events, organizations, meet-ups etc are "lesbians & gay men" events. Some organizations that provide resources for lesbians & gay men even only have gay men in their name. Why would they need equal visibility in the name? Anyway, historically this organization was only for and by gay men, lesbians should be glad they're being included at all.

The lesbian tag is mostly filled with "lesbians / gay men" posts too, of course. And even just posts about gay men that are tagged as "lesbian" only bc people always tag both.

Lesbians are expected to celebrate every win for gay men as if it were their own while getting barely any recognition themselves. If they get fed up, it's clearly because they hate gay men and are dividing the community and anyway what happened to solidarity?!

"Lesbian / gay man" culture is mainly just gay men culture. Nobody outside of small lesbian-centric circles even seems to know about eating out jokes, much less any other bits of "lesbian culture". Lesbians are expected to relate to dick-sucking jokes instead, to feel seen and included when gay male culture is referenced. If they point out that those jokes and references are not for or about them, they get lectured about how some lesbians do suck dick, you're just being transphobic.

Anyway, would that be messed up or what?

[sarocasm]

Friendly reminder that it's okay to be alloromantic allosexual!! There's nothing wrong with wanting both sex and romance, as long as you clearly communicate this!! If two (or more!) people talk about their needs and decide that they're okay with their sex not being strictly non-romantic, then that's fine and it isn't anyone else's business!! As long as they talk it through first and find that everyone involved is cool with the idea of romance, they aren't harming anyone!! Yeah, if you lead people on and act like it's gonna be no romo and then spring romance on them, that's a dick move, but if you make sure to tell them that you want romance on top of the sex and they still agree, then that's okay!! Some people do want that!!

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She's not "alloromantic", she's just obsessive and clingy and wants a special fancy word to justify it 🙄

Stop making up all these stupid concepts, she's not "experiencing romantic attraction" or whatever, and that's not a "crush", it's called anxious attachment style. Women are more into clasically "romantic" things and are thus often cupioromantic or bellusromantic. There's no need to make up a new type of attraction over this, "alloromantic" is literally just "I'm romance favourable, but in an extra special way"