shieldthys0ul

[shieldthys0ul]

War has taken everything from us in Gaza our home, safety, and peace. My baby Ronza, just 4 months old, is suffering from malnutrition in the hospital, while her brother Yamen battles painful sores. The hospital lacks the resources to treat them.

We are living in a nightmare with no water, food, or safety. Please, we need your help. Donate if you can, or share this post. Every action could save my children's lives. 💔

Thank you for your kindness and for being our hope. 🌹

Donate to this important cause or share to others to spread the word! From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.

[shieldthys0ul]

me in a nutshell

I confuse people. i have a happy personality and a sad soul. i'm bold but shy. i love deeply but sometimes i feel heartless. i'm healing and hurting at the same time. i'm dedicated to growth, but i self sabotage

[shieldthys0ul]

Be patient with yourself <3

“Be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.”

— Max Ehrmann; Desiderata

[shieldthys0ul]

Talk Talk - shieldthys0ul

it's ironic how the girls that talk behind each other's back

become friends the next month,

the gossip picks apart the person into a collage of their differences

she says she feels bad for me, so concerned, although,

I don't want your pity

or any perception of me that you have.

they tell me to talk more but what's the use if they won't listen

I stare, I mumble, I stutter

I forget my thoughts, I trail on,

my opinions can fit yours.

I can use your words in place of my individuality,

let me in, let me talk.

[shieldthys0ul]

A Change - shieldthysoul

You don't yearn for the change like I do

You're crowded in the smoke-filled air, but I want no pollution

You're afraid to try new things, sticking to one direction

same 'ol same 'ol is so boring to me

Why don't you want to paint all the colors like me?

Your sense of style is only bound to one

This party of two is a torture for one

If it makes you so happy, why are you complaining to me?

You speak so soft indoors why do you feel the need to shout nothings

I think I need a change of pace, some new friends, better clothes

I'm not your cure but I could be the remedy

You are like a friend to me

but you slither like my worst enemy.

[shieldthys0ul]

beabadoobee the woman you are.

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[shieldthys0ul]

you by shieldthysoul

Sometimes I think God punished me with a father I hate. Stuck under his clutch like his new pair of Nikes. I'm in my bedroom, the bathroom but no place is safe from his wrath.

His anger is what petrified his anger is what hides. Yet many of my homes have suffered his rampage.

I want to be better than him but he comes out in me when I'm mad. When he lifts his voice and stares I must hide my silent stare my hollowed screams by the narcissist ruining my dreams, mental and physical.

I cannot exist in a world where teenage girls are diminished to baseless sluts.

I curse in my writing, hidden from the man, yes the man that hates so much more than he loves. All my memories are filled with bad days and the memory of my cherished happinesses have but canceled out by an angry man who cannot let the breeze guide. After marriage is then that man will no longer hide.

I'll be able to prove and state and shape my terrors into art cherished by masses bound by no race or gender.

You want the truth but you don't want the truth. You want to learn the bad for better understanding but why must I prove bad is bad if all bad is bad.

The last time I was truly happy with all the things in my life... was a long long time ago.

Before I noticed I'll never have a voice of my own besides the art I give. How I give to others do so much of me and receive little and little as the time goes as I'm to blame for their distance.

You don't want me; you want the idea of me with you, going to fun events, making memories sharing secrets, having a bond. But you can't force love because love at its fullest is unconditional and if you can see a life without the existence of the thing that brought you love, you don't need it. You may want it but it doesn't want you back.

I stopped using exclamation marks because all my words hold emphasis, shock and attention.

All my phrases should be cherished like the bees pollenating followers in heaven's meadows.

A religion can guide a family to forgiveness and hope; at least my family is not dysfunctional confused betraying sad and ungrateful.

To cherish me was your one assignment that you failed as you failed to halt the action in you to reflect and find peace in yourself before subjecting others to confusion and betrayal by your hands.

How the story writes itself when it's true that the liars approach you in the night.

He fills me with so much fright yet I believe a shine will appear the water will become clearer and I'll be an adult with a huge house and a stable income from a stable career that cherishes me. Something you failed to do.

My every tear draws me back to the ocean and moon that guide me follow me drift me lift me.

Although two can put up a facade; I learned that from the two of you.

How the sun will shine brighter once my words hold so much meaning to another harmed soul, quiet speaker, money seeker, heart reaper, who truly understands you need struggle to force you find you.

[shieldthys0ul]

5 posts!

[shieldthys0ul]

All of our friends chose you. While the thought is emotionally draining, I won’t miss your immaturity and lack of accountability.

Continue to make jokes that I popularized but you now claim as your own.

Continue to steal from me.

Continue to shield your emotions.

Continue to isolate me.

Your continuation will pull you further down because that group chat you perceive as support is only a hollow shell that gives you momentary jokes. Yet you still laugh and joke about idiotic topics. Are you really happy? Or is it just a high that you take through the day to distract yourself from the night ponders of your loss of me.

[shieldthys0ul]

nature is gorgeous 🍃✨

[shieldthys0ul]

She said communication is key while keeping secrets from me. Stay truthful

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[shieldthys0ul]