shoutoutparadize

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It's my 8 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

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I feel like im a looser

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Hi

I just want to stay alone and dont wanna interact with anybody.

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Hi

Hi myself

I know right now the only one who understands me the most is myself

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Hi

Hi its me again, why im so much in doubtful right now... how are you my self?

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Hi

Hey this is still post from 13’th april 2020 and i just remember

If i die, i want my body to be cremation because i know that nobody will come to visit me anyway i dont have relatives

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13 April 2020

Malam Malam hari ini aku merasa semua berat, entah dari aspek apapun itu rasanya aku ingin berlari keluar meninggalkan segala masalah yang ada. Ketika orang lain bilang lari dari masalah itu bukan hal yang baik, better kita menyelesaikan masalah. Tapi untuk seseorang yang memang sedang diambang batas dan sudah tidak tahu lagi, kiasan diatas tadi apa artinya? Layaknya menggapai bayangan yang terlihat tetapi tidak tersentuh, nyata tetapi tidak selalu ada disaat gelap, selalu berdampingan tapi tidak memiliki makna. Aku rindu akan kebebasan, aku rindu hal hal aneh yang biasa aku lakukan sendiri, aku rindu menari sendiri dikala bosan dan penat, aku rindu diriku yang dulu. Kenapa semua tiba tiba terasa berat, kemana aku ? Aku ada dimana ? Bagaimana aku? Aku yang mana? Aku mengapa? Kegundahan dan kegelisahan yang dirasa rasanya bukan hal yang bisa diselesaikan secepat itu. Tenang.. aku hanya butuh ketenangan... entah sampai kapan tapi aku ingin ketenangan.

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i know it from you, thank you :)

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Today

Hey

Today and yesterday never be the same day, there always a new moment in each second of life. We never expect whats gonna wait us ahead. The night before this day i realized that i still remember the song, the old song i ever love to heard before. i realized how much i really deeply in love with the song that i heard it repeated. Did you know that i still listening to this song in silence though i have a lot of playlist wait for me to play it. i need to make all of this clear no matter what, i cant move to the next song if i didnt listen it until the end without skip the song. Can i fix this ? can i go back ? can i turn back the time and tell you that i still want something to hear ? How long i did this ? How long i face this condition without telling anyone the truth ? i just know 1 thing... That when i fall in love with 1 song, i’ll listening to the song, got into the song and sing a long the song.

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Good Evening, the lost word already back and told that it wants to be the part of our song again. A few year ago the word left the song because it told that the song dont really matched up with the song. Song just keep with it’s line without the word. But the day already change and everything went flies so fast... the word cant find any song which match with it. Now the song see’s that the word come back and told that it wants to be the part of the song again, but we’ll see.. the song already fill up the lost word with another word. Then the word told that it want to stay wait for the song needs the word again although the song already told the word that it wont be happen for the second time.

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When there's no sounds anymore..

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percaya yang layaknya memegang angan maksud tidak tabu tuk menggapai tapi sulit tuk menadah yang terjatuh.

ShoutOutParadize

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Hati tak paham datangnya kasih, tapi mengapa ia paham kasih yang hilang?

ShoutOutParadize

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Beauty will gone when getting older, riches will never carried by our death, and hating peoples will never solve any problems. Well, do you still thinking that a shortly ego will bring you to joy ? I hope no.

ShoutOutParadize

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we almost became something. and you almost loved me and i almost loved you. we almost made it, but almost isn’t enough. i guess they were right when they said that almost was the saddest word in the world because you were my almost and now you’re gone and i don’t know what to do with myself.

(via unwrittenphrases)

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He may still love you. He probably does. He probably doesn’t know what he wants. He probably still thinks about you all the time. But that isn’t what matters. What matters is what he’s doing about it, and what he’s doing about it is nothing. And if he’s doing nothing, you most certainly shouldn’t do anything. You need someone who goes out of their way to make it obvious that they want you in their life.

Quotes from The Love Whisperer (via thelovewhisperer)

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Hi guys, welcome back to my blog.. Now already 9.37 pm here in my country btw dont forget to have your dinner all 👻 This night i just want to share about my fav. Song which i was so often listening to this music.. Uhmmm... Btw this music come from South Korean #yuhuu although i didnt know whats the meaning of this song before i search for the meaning 😂 but the instrument really catch my heart guyss 😍😘 but dont worry, i'll show you the meaning of this songs. Source : https://www.musixmatch.com/lyrics/박보람-Park-Boram/거짓말이라도-해줘요-Please-Say-Something-Even-Though-It-Is-a-Lie Lyrics for 거짓말이라도 해줘요 Please Say Something, Even Though It Is a Lie by 박보람 이런 게 사랑인 건가요 그대란 사람 내게 두근거리게 한 줄도 모르고 그저 감기에 걸려 이렇게 열이 나고 아파서 밤새 뒤척인 줄 알았죠 나 그대가 옮긴 사랑 때문에 잠 못 들고 있죠 어떡하죠 거짓말이라도 해줘요 그대도 나를 사랑한다고 심장이 뛰는 게 이러다 큰일 나죠 어떻게든 해주세요 나 그대가 없는 하루 때문에 몰래 울고 있죠 어떡하죠 거짓말이라도 해줘요 조금만 기다리면 된다고 오늘이 지나고 내일이면 내 곁에 다시 돌아와 준다고 우리 같은 곳을 보면서 믿지 못 할 사랑을 해봐요 이대로 내 곁에 있어요 그대도 나 없으면 안되죠 잠시 멀어져도 한발 더 멀어져도 우리는 만날 수밖에 그대는 또 다른 나라서 English Source : https://popgasa.com/2016/08/03/park-bo-ram-please-say-something-even-though-it-is-a-lie-거짓말이라도-해줘요-w-ost/ Is this what love is? I didn’t even know that It was you who made my heart pound I thought I had a fever because of a cold I thought I tossed and turned all night because I was sick Because of the love that you gave me I can’t even fall asleep, what do I do? Tell me, even if it’s a lie That you love me too My heart is racing too much Something’s gonna happen Please do something Because of my days without you I am secretly crying, what do I do? Tell me, even if it’s a lie That I just need to wait a little more That when today passes and tomorrow comes That you’ll come back to me Let’s look at the same place And have an unbelievable love Stay by my side like this You can’t go on without me either Even if we’re apart for a moment Even if we get one step farther away We have no choice but to meet Because you’re a different me OKAYS THATS ALL FROM ME FOR THIS NIGHT GUYYSSSS Hope you all like this 😊