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softlymellow · 17 days ago

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The Order Forgot Me First - Chapter 14

☆⁠ PAIRING : Anakin Skywalker x Reader

☆⁠ word count: 5.6k

☆⁠ story themes: lovers to enemies to eventually lovers

☆⁠ warnings: spoilers to SWTCW, some angst some fluff

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14

"When someone like Anakin shows up in the empty spaces of your life…you start filling in the blanks yourself."

Padme said nothing as they moved through the polished corridors, her heels echoing softly. Anakin’s steps required more effort, his boots heavier, like he was still somewhere else.

The walk was short but felt excruciatingly long.

They didn’t look at each other. But they moved in parallel.

Anakin fought the urge from trying to explain himself to Padme. His throat bobbed and his head hung low. He didn’t owe Padme anything. But he felt like he needed to clear things up.

“I wasn’t–”

“You don’t need to explain, Ani.” Padme cut him off gently, still not looking at him.

“I wasn’t going to apologise,” he said in a much quieter tone. “But, I wasn’t hiding anything either.”

Padme’s eyes flickered to her side, studying his sunken expression. The tension in his jaw, the exhaustion lining his features.

“I didn’t think you were,” she replied, “You’ve made it clear how you feel.”

It sounded a lot harsher than she intended, but she didn’t take it back. They turned a corner, passing a pair of clones that were stationed near her transport.

“You should know,” Anakin said, after a few paces. “She was worried.”

Padme lifted an eyebrow at this but allowed him to continue talking.

“In the medbay. She said something about…you and me. About how close we looked since she left.”

Padme’s head tilted. That caught her attention.

“She did?”

His voice dropped lower, less defensive, more raw. “She didn’t accuse me,” he added. “But she noticed. And I think it bothers her.”

Padme’s lips parted again.

“I…I didn’t realise she had seen it that way.”

Anakin gave her a slow nod, feeling something twist in his stomach. “Neither did I.” He rubbed his fingers absently.

He knew what came next. What should come next. The sensible thing. The right thing.

Padme did too. She dreaded it. Afraid of the solution he would give her. One that would force herself away from him, for the sake of his relationship. She didn’t want to hear it. She needed a resolution herself.

The words began to form, his throat felt like it was tightening.

“What if—”

“I should go.” Padme interrupted abruptly, turning to look towards jer transport ahead. Anakin froze mid step, his mouth left hanging and his words abandoned in the air.

Padme didn’t wait for him, her heels clicking and drowning out whatever he might say.

Anakin stood there, his eyes dark with something unreadable.

But for Padme?

The thought stuck in her mind. Quiet and unresolved.

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

The morning light bled through your thin blinds, turning your room into golds and shadows.

Your body ached, your ribs were still wrapped around in both bandages and the ghosts of Vale’s fingerprints. You groaned. The memory of his hands around you didn’t disappear overnight. Not that you had expected it to.

You sat up slowly, exhaling through clenched teeth as your body attempted to fight off your sleep. The bacta patches were warm and pulsing, still doing their job.

You stretched your arms over your head and sighed as they fell down on your lap. Your datapad blinked on the nightstand with a single line notification.

Picking it up, you thumbed it open out of habit and began to skim through your personal logs and assignments.

You scrolled through your tasks list but it was blanked. Furrowing your eyebrows, you switched between tabs trying to find it.

That high-priority mission from two days ago, the Deep-space scouting operation was gone. Just disappeared.

Not reassigned.

Not cancelled.

Erased.

You stared at the screen for a moment, frowning. There was no Council note or transfer of assignment.

You dropped your datapad away to take with you. It didn’t feel important. Not now. Someone else can deal with the other minefields.

You traded your clothes for some loose pants and a short sleeve grey compression shirt.

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

The Temple was quieter than usual today. Not dead but as if it was in between a few things.

Some soldiers laughed, their helmets under their arms. A few offered you a short “Commander,” as you passed, you nodded. You weren’t sure if they did it out of habit or genuine respect.

Once you reached the mess, it was mid cycle. There were rows of both Jedi but majority clones hunched over their ration trays. The hum of conversations and occasional clatter of utensils filled the space.

You hesitated at the entrance, grabbing a tray and moved to the serving line. You exhaled, your anxiety meeting you at a place that you had never experienced before. Ever since you came back, you avoided places like these. Often opting out for some take out and eating alone, this was different. It was just before lunch, soldiers wanting to eat before the rush, yet early enough it could be considered late breakfast.

“Been a while, Commander.” You looked up to the voice that belonged to the mess attendant, an older soldier. His armour was replaced with a simple kitchen tunic but his posture remained rigid.

“You want the usual?”

You glanced down at what was offered. A nut paste. Ration bread. And something green you didn’t want to question.

You nodded. “Yes, please.” The familiarity of his words settled strangely in your chest.

He worked quickly and scooped your portions onto your tray. “Good to see you back,” he added, handing it over. “We’ve lost a few good people,” he glanced up at you. You stared back at him, unsure of what to say. Giving him a force tightlipped smile, you replied back.

“Thanks,” and you took your food and moved to the booths near the window, overlooking Coruscant’s skyline. The city was alive. Air traffic never stops.

You dropped your tray down and sat, your fingers twitching absently near your spoon.

You would always spend your time eating here with Ahsoka. You were lighthearted, quick to speak with nearby soldiers, making jokes and such. But it seems the war killed that part of you.

You were alone now.

Holding the spoon in one hand, you scooped up the nut paste and brought it to your mouth. Your face instantly contoured in disgust. You had completely forgotten what it tasted like. Often just leaving it on your plate and eating the bread instead.

You brought your datapad out.

No messages.

You weren’t expecting any, but still.

A few minutes passed in silence. You forced yourself to eat. There were a few glances. Some that were quick, others like they were measuring.

It made sense, some have seen you since you came back. Others not.

Then—

“You just gonna sit there looking miserable all day?”

You looked up.

Fives stood in front of your table, tray in his hand and his brow raised with amusement. Kix was behind him, taking a bite of something suspicious-looking into his mouth.

“I’ve only been sitting for five minutes,” you muttered.

Fives chuckled and slid into the booth without warning, both him and Kix sitting across from you.

“How’s the shoulder?” Kix asked, eyeing you as you slowly took a bite out of the mystery green. Not bad. Warm.

You shrugged, swallowing the food down. “Not bad. Good enough to fake it.” You picked up another spoonful, “I get the feeling though the Temple medics care more about paperwork than pain thresholds.”

“They are,” Kix said flatly. “I helped train some. They log bruises like war crimes.”

You smirked a little, but didn’t reply back.

Fives tilted his head, “so? How’s it feel being back?”

You hesitated a little. It wasn’t all that great. Retrospectively there have been no positives since you came. A little fame? Maybe, yeah.

You played with your food a little before answering, poking at the nut paste. “I don’t know,” you admitted.

Five’s noticed the hesitation behind your voice. Your anxious fidgeting. He didn’t push any further. He nodded slowly and took a bite of his bread. “That’s fair.”

“And you guys?” You looked up at both of them.

“Other than standard galactic chaos? The usual.” Kix deadpanned.

“Oh and someone broke the showers on sublevel three,” Fives added. “Still an unsolved mystery.”

You snorted and rolled your eyes. The tension on your shoulders eased. There was a pause, long enough for you all to settle into something more comfortable. You stared out the window to Coruscant’s air traffic. Somewhere someone was dying. Somewhere, the war kept spinning.

Fives leaned back, watching you. Noticing the way your hair looked a different colour under the sun. He wasn’t trying to measure your recovery. Or your small scars that littered your skin. Something quieter.

“They got you back on rotation yet?”

Turning your gaze back to Fives, you cleared your throat. “I think so,” you said. “Nothing’s been confirmed.”

As if on cue, your datapad buzzed softly next to your tray.

You picked it up and swiped on the notification before you could think.

Kamino Medical Liaison Assignment – Commander L/n

Tipoca City, Kamino — Medical Level Pending confirmation.

Priority Tag: Observational Only

You stared at it.

“You good?” Kix asked.

You exhaled softly. “Yeah. Just got my assignment.”

“Kriff, that was fast,” Fives muttered. “Where to?”

“Kamino.”

Both their expressions shifted. And you knew what it meant. This isn't your field. Your role here was just to observe. Be on the sidelines.

Kix took a sip of caf. “Medical support, I’m guessing?”

You nodded. “Feels like they don’t know what to do with me,” you replied.

Kix’s tone softened, noticing your disheartened voice. “You’ll make a difference there. A real one.”

Fives nodded in agreement. “Yeah. And honestly? They could use someone like you on Kamino. They listen more when it’s not a Kaminoan.”

You looked down at your tray. It wasn’t what you wanted. But it was something. And maybe it was enough for now.

The silence said enough.

“For what it’s worth…I’m glad you’re back.” Fives added.

You glanced up at his reassuring smile.

Kix let out a quiet breath. “Yeah. And if you ever feel like stabbing someone, I can slip you a scalpel from the medbay.”

You huffed out a laugh. “Comforting,” you said dryly, they both chuckled.

The ache in your chest didn’t go away. But it did settle.

Before Fives could make his own smart comment, Kix stood up, glancing at his chrono. “Alright, I got to head back. Nice to see you, Commander.”

“Likewise,” you shot him a tight-lipped smile.

Fives sat and watched you quietly as Kix walked away.

There was a moment of silence as you accepted the mission and then picked up your spoon again, ready to absentmindedly nudge your food.

“You don’t have to pretend,” Fives’ gruff voice made you look up at him.

“Hm?”

“To be okay. To be back.”

You gave him a small smile. “I know..”

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Anakin leaned against the wall, his arms crossed and his eyes fixated on a datapad he hadn’t actually processed in twenty minutes. He kept rereading the same sentence again. Again. And again. And still he wasn’t making sense of anything.

It never stopped.

“You’re brooding again,” Obi-wan’s voice came behind him.

“I’m reading, Master.” Anakin shot back without looking up.

“You’re rereading the same report you send me three days ago.”

Anakin signed and let the datapad drop against his thigh and he turned his head to look at Obi-wan. He was stood near the entrance of the war room, his arms around his back, and he looked tired. Everyone looked tired these days.

“Didn’t realise I was being watched,” he shrugged.

“You make it very easy,” Obi-wan replied, stepping beside him.

“Good to know.”

They stood for a few moments, watching a few younglings pass by the window, holding a stack of training manuls.

“You could rest, you know,” Obi-wan said. “You’re not on rotation until tomorrow.”

“Resting doesn’t fix anything.”

“It’s not meant to fix anything. It’s meant to keep you alive long enough for you to try.”

He didn’t respond, but his jaw was tight and his eyes unfocused again.

“You’re not sleeping, are you?”

Another beat of silence.

“Do you ever stop keeping track?” Anakin asked, his voice flat.

“Excuse me?”

“Every death. Every mission that doesn’t go the way it was planned. Do you ever stop counting?

Obi-wan doesn’t reply right away. “Not really,” he admitted. “But I try to remember why we’re fighting.”

Anakin let out a humourless laugh. “And what if you’re not sure anymore?”

“You are sure,” He said firmly. “You just hate what it costs you.”

Anakin looked down at his hands. Once that had a black glove. The other was rough and had scarred skin.

Obi-wan stepped away, giving him space.

“I have another Council meeting. Try not to lose your mind in the next hour.”

“Sure. Put it on the pile.” Anakin muttered.

Obi-wan gave him one last look before retreating back.

Anakin stared out the window. It was only late afternoon but he hated this part of the day. The outside was harsh and golden but the sunlight pressed against the glass, warm and unrelenting. It caught on his face, the side of his neck and the strip of skin beneath his collar.

The Temple walls didn’t breathe much at this house. It was quiet and still. It had weight with things he didn’t want to remember. His skin felt itchy.

It came around this time of day. Where he would remember sitting on the cracked sunbaked steps as a boy, sweat drying on his back. His house was too hot to enter but the air outside tasted like dust and waiting for something. Like hope.

This tasted the same.

He hated this part of the day.

The sun shouldn’t make him feel like this.

His thoughts spiraled too easily.

His mother. Ahsoka. Y/n.

Every name he couldn’t say out loud but every connection he wasn’t allowed to keep. Every person who slipped out of his reach.

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

After the mess hall you had showered off the Temple’s humidity and returned to your room. You were not curled on your sleep couch, datapad propped against your knee. Half reading through post-battle debriefs, politics and whatever piqued your interest at this hour. Which was nothing. Your eyes moved but your brain didn’t.

Your mind couldn’t help but wander off to Anakin. What had happened that night. The way his head was so close to yours. His breath against yours.

The ping of your datapad interrupted your thoughts. It wasn’t the usual Temple alert note but a softer one.

You tapped the blinking corner and a new message slid across your screen.

Secure Direct Comm Link

Sender: Senator Padme Amidala

If you’re free tonight…I’d like to speak with you. Come to mine for dinner. Just us. No guards or formalities. Wear anything you’d like, please.

And then a second message appeared.

I owe you clarity.

You stared longer than you meant to. You weren’t sure how to feel about this. Before leaving, Padme and you weren’t exactly close. Yes, you would speak to her from time to time, but anything one on one was different.

But you stood anyway. Something you’d like? You walked over to your closet and skimmed past your uniforms, temple issued gear. And settled on black. Something that was you.

--- --- --- --- --- --- ---

The corridors to the apartment were quiet in the evening. You smoothed your outfit again, even though you had checked it multiple times in the mirror.

It was simple. A long sleeved black dress that hugged your thighs and then flared below your calves and had a square neckline that framed the top of your chest.

The door slid open before you could buzz.

“Y/n!” Padme said warmly, engulfing in your hug before letting you go equally as fast. “I’m glad you came.”

“It’s lovely to see you,” you said politely, stepping into her dimly lit apartment. I twas curated so guests could come even when they didn’t company.

The table was already set. Two plates and a few covered dishes still seaming.

“You look beautiful,” she said.

You softly smiled at her, “thank you. You look great as well.” Unsure of how to exactly compliment her.

She was dressed more simply than usual. An elegant cream wrap around dress but she still managed to make it look expensive. Her hair was pinned back and she had a green jweled necklace on.

“I hope this isn’t too strange,” she said. She then motioned to the table. “Please, sit. It;s just roast and steamed greens. Nothing fancy.”

“No! It’s great. Beats anything in the mess hall.” You joked, taking a seat across from her in the small table.

She lifted the covers from the dish and began plating both your plates quietly. You sat, unsure where to put your hands.

“How’s your side?”

You blinked. “Sorry?”

Padme gestured towards your ribs. “Is it healed yet?”

You nodded slowly, sometimes forgetting you were injured yourself. “It’s just bruises now. The bacta helps but…yeah.”

“Good.” She smiled softly, setting down your plate. “You didn’t show it that night.”

“I didn’t want to.”

Padme gave a quiet hum. “I wouldn’t have either.”

You picked up your fork and began pushing at pieces of green.

“Monian seemed…captivated.” Your eyes flicked up at her, your jaw tightened slightly, but you didn’t respond.

She didn’t push. Instead she leaned back and took a slow sip before glass before speaking again. “You’ve been through a lot since Dev. The temple. The injuries. Vale.” She began to pick up her fork and knife, gnawing at the piece of meat. “It’s a wonder how you’re still alive.”

“It doesn’t feel much of a comeback.” You muttered.

“It does to the people watching.”

She softened again. “You don’t have to talk about him, if you don’t want to.”

“Dev?”

“No,” she hesitated. “Anakin.”

You swallowed and shut up immediately. This was what she wanted to talk to you about. Anakin. You knew this was coming.

The silence stretched just a bit longer than usual.

“I wanted to speak with you sooner,” Padme said carefully. “But it never felt like the right time.”

“There wasn’t a right time.”

She nodded in agreement. “No. There wasn’t.”

She inhaled deeply as you took a sip of your wine. “I spoke to Anakin briefly. He mentioned something.” She hesitated. “About you being in the medbay… That you brought me up.”

Your heart panged.

“I think there may have been… some misunderstanding. Or at least it’s been weighing on you and I should have addressed it earlier.”

Her voice didn’t waver.

“About me. And Anakin.” She looked at you directly, her fork hovering in the air before bringing it to her mouth.

She chewed and swallowed, leaving you anxiously sitting there waiting for her to continue.

“After you left the Order…he broke down. I don’t think anyone but Obi-wan and I noticed. He was…angry, reckless. Hurt in ways he couldn’t say.”

You didn’t speak. Your food left abandoned on the plate.

“I listened. I was there. We had met when we were both only children. It made sense for him to confide in me.”

“You say that like I should thank you.”

Padme’s eyes flickered with something. “I’m not asking you to. I’m saying it because no one else will. And because you looked at me like I had taken something from you.”

“Why are you even telling me this?” You swallowed.

Her tone shifted to something quieter. “Because it’s easier to hate someone when you only have half the truth.” She met your eyes.

You stared for a long moment. “I’m a Jedi. Or…I was. We’re not even supposed to think about things like this. Relationships. Possession. Attachment. It’s forbidden.”

“I’m not suggesting anything,” Padme defensively said. “And neither was he.”

“Then why bring it up?” You asked.

She paused then took a slow breath. “I don’t want you to get this wrong idea. Obi-wan and I…We both tried. We weren’t trying to replace you.”

You stared at your plate again. It was going cold now. The roast untouched beside the greens.

“Replace me?” you repeated. “Padme. I left. There was no replacing. I wasn’t there to be missed.”

“That’s not true.”

You looked at her, dropping your diplomatic mask. “I was hurt too, you know? My whole life changed that day…And when I came back…It didn’t get any easier.”

“I know,” she set down her utensils. The silence felt heavier than anything she could have said.

“Anakin–he tried. Tried to reach you. He didn’t have many people he could trust, and after you left…”

Her words trailed off but you were still looking at her. Your eyes now burning.

“I thought I knew him better than anyone else,” you let out a humourless laugh. “And then I came back and it was…it was like I was intruding on something.”

A pause.

“I was always so careful,” she began. “Careful with everything. Until him.”

There it was.

You didn’t speak. Not yet.

How could you respond to that? To someone else’s version of your person? To the realisation that while you were gone, the possibility of someone else falling for him wasn’t unexpected.

“He came to me a lot. I thought…I thought I was helping.” She glanced down and swirled her wine in her glass without taking a sip.

“Perhaps part of me misread that closeness for something else.”

You blinked. “Misread it how?”

She had a small, self-deprecating smile. A little ashamed. “I thought maybe he felt something more. I didn’t act on it. But I felt it. Or I thought I did.”

She wasn’t lying. She looked embarrassed to even tell you this.

“Did he…”

Padme shook her head immediately. “He never crossed the lines between Jedi and Senator. Perhaps in friendship, yes. But he was there. All the time. When someone like Anakin shows up in the empty spaces of your life…you start filling in the blanks yourself.”

Suddenly clearing her throat, she began to take her fork and eat food from her plate. “You don’t have to believe me.” She said in between bites. “But I think he felt more for you than he’s ever let himself say.”

You didn’t move but something in your chest did. She must’ve noticed because she didn’t press you any further. Didn’t try to convince you.

You glanced down at your plate and then at her cityscape window. Coruscant was always beautiful at night.

“I didn’t know what to expect coming here,” you finally muttered. “Sitting down and talking to you.”

“I didn’t invite you to try and provoke you, honestly.” She said gently. “I just didn’t want you to believe I would do anything to hurt you.”

You nodded and began to eat your own food, not wanting it to go to waste,

“I honestly think he’s still trying to figure out if you’re real.” She said to which you snorted.

“I think he resents me,” you murmured.

“I think he resents himself.”

You glanced up at her once and then continued eating. Not wanting that last comment to ruin your appetite. Anakin meant everything to you. Just the thought that maybe, maybe he hated himself, made you feel sick.

After more eating and quiet talk, no longer about Anakin but rather how much or less the Order changed, she finally stood up.

She took your plates and began to clear them, you moved to help but she stopped you gently.

“I’ve got it. Thank you.” She said kindly. You watched her back. The posture of someone who felt things they should not, but working to amend them.

You smoothed out your dress.

“I never hated you, Padme.” You said honestly. “I’m glad that we had this talk, really.”

She looked over at you and gave you a small smile, her eyes bright. “I feel the same way, Y/n.”

You held her gaze for a moment before walking to the door, Padme escorting you out.

“Thank you for the dinner tonight. It was beautiful.” You stood out the corridor.

She shook her head, “My pleasure. I hope you have a safe trip home.”

You nodded and then bid your farewells. The city had begun to quieten down. By the time you reached your speeder, the night wind bit at your skin. You boarded the transport back to the Temple, the weight of the conversation still hanging in your chest.

--- --- --- --- --- --- ---

You finally turned into the final corridor towards your quarters, your footsteps soft against the polished hard floor. There was a deep blue that cast over the sleeping Temple. You were just as ready to fall asleep as everyone else.

As you rounded the corridor, you paused immediately in place.

Anakin.

Sitting outside your door.

His legs lie flat on the floor. Hands loose in his lap. His head leaning against the wall like he’d been waiting a while.

Your heart dropped to your stomach.

“What the hell,” you whispered harshly, walking over to him with a dumbfounded expression. “What are you doing here?”

He blinked slowly and stood up, almost sheepish. His hair was messier than usual and his tunic was wrinkled.

Stepping closer to him, your voice was hushed but sharp. “Are you out of your mind? If someone sees you—”

“No one’s going to see me,” he muttered. “Everyone’s asleep.”

“Yeah, well. We’re not.” You snapped back, glancing between both sides of the hallway. “You’re standing outside my room like a lunatic—what do you want?”

He looked at you, his dark eyes boring into yours.

“I needed to see you.”

You scoffed, “So you waited out here like a creep?”

“I tried knocking,” he shot you a small smirk, as if this was amusing.

You rolled your eyes and key’d your door open, stepping inside and Anakin following in. This didn’t feel good. This didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel like what it was before. When he would actually sneak into your room late at night. This felt blatantly wrong.

“I didn’t know when you’d be back.” His eyes began to trail down your figure. Memorising every little detail of your dress. The way it hugged your body. Your lace sleeves. The way it was simple but you simply being in it was enough to leave Anakin longing for more.

And then he snapped out of it. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked back up to your eyes. “Where were you? Why are you dressed like that?”

“Why do you care?” You tested.

His jaw flexed, just once, but hard enough to say everything he wasn’t saying.

“I went to go see Padme,” you said.

Anakin tilted his head, “Padme?”

“Mhm,” you hummed, stepping further back into your room while still facing him. But Anakin moved towards you at the same time.

“You told her what I said in the medbay? Really, Anakin.” You scoffed looking away from him.

He inhaled quietly. “I didn’t mean for her to bring it up to you.”

“But it still happened.” You looked back at him in disbelief. “Do you just talk about me to whoever’s around when I’m not there?”

His mouth opened slightly, and then closed again. He licked his lips.

“I didn’t mean for it to be like that," he muttered in a low voice.

“Totally, Anakin.” You bitterly laughed under your breath. “How embarrassing.”

“I was trying to explain. She could tell I was acting differently. I didn’t even say much.”

You didn’t say anything. You just pressed your lips together and looked away. Trying to ignore the way the Force felt like it was pulling you both in together. How just being in the same room as Anakin Skywalker made everything feel sharper.

“Whatever,” you muttered. “It’s done now.”

“Y/n.”

You looked over at him.

“I didn’t know you were going out tonight,” he said in a much softer tone.

You rubbed your face with your palm, feeling the day weighing down on you. “It wasn’t a secret.”

This made his jaw tick. He took one step closer, then another. You didn’t trust yourself to move.

“I didn’t know where you went, or who you were with…” He trailed off. He was close now. “I hated it.”

You blinked. “You’re not entitled to know anymore.”

“I know,” he murmured. “But I still hated it.”

His voice was lower now, more rough. You smelt the slightest trace of his cologne. Your eyes dipped down to his mouth before catching yourself.

He wouldn’t stop looking at you. You felt uneasy under his gaze. His dark eyes.

“Why are you here, Anakin?” You asked in a voice that was barely a whisper.

He hesitated. “I wanted to see you.”

Your chest burned.

“That’s not fair.”

“I know.”

You didn’t move but neither did. Maybe if you stood long enough something would break. Like a crash. An attack. Someone walking in.

But nothing.

It was so quiet.

You couldn’t distinguish the sound of your own breath between his.

You felt your heartbeat against your chest.

“Anakin…” you whispered, unsure if he heard you or not.

But he did.

His breath hitched and his eyes kept flickering between your mouth and above.

Your mouth.

Your eyes.

Your mouth.

Your eyes.

The air between you had gone heavy, charged. Like the Force itself was holding its own breath.

He then stepped closer. Just once.

A single step that brought him too close. Close enough that his chest brushed against yours and it felt hot to the touch.

His hand lifted slowly, cautiously. Like he was hesitating. Waiting for you to push him away like you always did. Waiting for you to yell at him again. But you didn’t. You couldn’t move, not with the way he was staring at you.

His fingers found your chin, tilting your face up towards his.

He leaned in. Closer. So slow it was unbearable.

His jaw was tense. His lips parted slightly. His eyes, dark and unreadable. But they began to flutter shut.

And then, finally.

His lips brushed against yours. A ghost of a touch. Barely there.

Like he was waiting. Waiting for you to pull back. To tell him this was wrong. But you didn’t.

And then.

His mouth pressed against yours.

It was soft. Softer than anything he’d ever done. Than any kiss you have shared in the past.

And you kissed him back, the tension shattering. It was slow. Like neither of you trusted it to be real.

His hand moved up to your cheek, his thumb skimming along your jawline. His other hand settled onto your waist, so carefully, so slowly. Terrified that you would disappear if he didn’t anchor himself onto you.

He tilted his head, enough to deepen the kiss. Your mouths moved together like it was instinct. It was slow and aching. A kiss that whispered I missed you if he couldn’t say it in words.

Your own hands moved too, fisting the fabric at his shoulders, pulling him in closer.

He pulled back for just a breaths distance.

Neither of you said a word.

His chest moved up and down. Both of your eyes were closed and neither of you moved away.

You didn’t say anything.

So he kissed you again.

Deeper this time. Still soft but hungrier. Like his restraint was slipping and he was starving.

He leaned over you, more urgently. Like everytime he pulled back, everytime your lips parted by only an inch, he couldn’t stop himself from coming back in. Like he was afraid he would never have this chance again.

His lips began to dip lower. Pressing another kiss just below your mouth. Then again, lower, at the curve of your jaw. And another at your neck. The sound of his lips on your skin was enough for you.

“Ani…” you murmured without thinking.

He paused for half a second but didn’t react, he just exhaled against your skin like he needed to hear it.

He finally pulled back, but only by inches. His hands still on your waist and his brown drawn. His eyes still flickering between yours and your mouth like he hasn’t had enough.

“You can’t do this,” his voice hoarse. “You can’t come back, kiss me like that, and leave me again.”

Your throat tightened. “I didn’t plan this.”

“But it happened.” He said. “And I can’t stop thinking about you. I haven’t. Not for a second.”

You swallowed, your eyes searching his desperate ones.

His voice dropped, “You can’t walk away from this again, not like nothing happened.”

His chest was rising like he was holding back everything else he wanted to say.

“I’m not,” you whispered. “But you need to go.” You stepped back carefully. Your hands leaving his body and his to yours. It pained him.

“You don’t mean that.”

“Anakin, please.”

He looked at you like you were killing him.

But without a word, with hope in his heart, he stepped back towards the door. You didn’t move. You didn’t bid him goodnight. You couldn’t. You couldn’t when you still felt his touch on you. His lips against yours.

And finally, he walked out, not with anger or regret. But with everything left unsaid.

A/n: guys... im so sorry istg like this took me agesss ive just been going through so much stuff rn im SRRY IF IT DIDNT MEET UR EXPECTATIONSSSS BUT IT HAPPENED i want to clarify series isnt over until rots until then more drama and stufff not done with the angst fully yet but guysssssss WAS THE KISS RUSHED PLZ SAY NO

also im going to respond to everyones comments on my last few posts thanks to literally everyone who was checking up on me its the sweetest thing ever and i never ever imagined people loved my writing to the point of waiting and thinking about it like daysss afterwars seriously its the sweetest

i really hope u guys liked this chapter, i have my final exam on monday so after that hopefully more regular posts!

Taglist: @endairachristensen26 @hayden-christensen-verse @ducks118 @seventeen-x @movingalongthekiwi @ssnapsaurus @caramelfondu @dayrin085 @devilslittlehelper @f1wh0recom @green-lxght @bettysgardenswift @heyitsbeeeb @user-3113s-blog @fandomhoe101 @veronaspencil @zudooms @hiphopdancer101universe @starfire21 @devotedlypaleluminary @miksxz @lacherrysouldy @lotushzl @biddycums @wandasblacknails @moonixlity @icanmeltanigloo @isntthatsweetiguessso @kiyotofish @balsalmic-vinegar @thereeallink @sylusisbae @queenanababy @ifonlyihadneverseenhim @lotushzl @guizhou09 @tvdelrey @lils-and-everything-else @gracielikegrapes @thatgoesinthere-misshapes @chris-continues

if u want to be added or removed lmk!

PLZ LMK WHAT U GUYS THINK this also wasnt proof read so like ignore the typos </3

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softlymellow · 17 days ago

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Hi queen I hate to ask since I'm sure probably 15 others have asked already but when is chapter 14 coming out 😔 Its literally my bedtime fic and I swear I can't sleep in peace wtout knowing what comes next 😭💔

TODAYYYY YALLLL I PROMISE WALLAH!!! IM SO SORRY IVE BEEN MIA BUT MY LAST EXAM IS MONDAY AND THEM IM FREE AND IM SO EXCITED TO WRITE!!!!!!!!!!!

and Im going to reply to EVERYONEEEE I literally appreciate everyone sm I love u allllll

Guys tonight means (I’m Australian 😭) approx maybe a little less than 5 ish hours

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softlymellow · 27 days ago

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Order forgot me first update

Yallll give me an like a few days before the next chapter exams r hitting me like crazy and I am currently going through a semi break/break up with my bf 😃😃🙁

I’ve been reading all ur lovely comments and stuff in my inbox I’ll get back to yall soon I’m just really sad and heartbroken rn I will probably project this into the next chapters sorry guys 😭 anyways I love u all thx for being so patient with me I love love u guys and the ppl who are always commenting and talking to me about my writing mwah

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softlymellow · 1 month ago

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The Order Forgot Me First - Chapter 13

☆⁠ PAIRING : Anakin Skywalker x Reader

☆⁠ word count: 5k !!!!??!?!?!?

☆⁠ story themes: lovers to enemies to eventually lovers

☆⁠ warnings: spoilers to SWTCW, some angst some fluff TW PHYSICAL/MILD SEXUAL HARRASSMENT

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14

"Jealousy in Jedi robes."

The conversation went on, politics and more politics. The senators spoke amongst themselves while you shifted weight between your feet. Anakin did the same, though he had a rather hard look on his face, his Adam's apple bobbing every minute or so. Padme, Bail and Monian seemed quite eager to discuss the political agendas of the night.

You stayed quiet, letting the words pass you through one ear and out the other. It wasn’t until you felt Monian shifting closer to you, his face leaned in.

“You don’t wear silence well,” he said, low enough that only you could hear.

You gave him a side glance. “It’s the only thing I’m allowed to do lately,” you snorted.

He chuckled softly, “they should let you speak more often.” He brought his glass up to his well trimmed beard. “I’m rather keen on your thoughts on the shifting trades.”

Across the circle, Anakin spoke. “You never struck me as someone who was interested in politics.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, looking at him as if you were back in the training arena. “That’s because you were never listening.”

The air tightened. Padme blinked, her shoulders still.

Monian had a rather bemused expression, “the way I see it, a Commander would know plenty about politics,” he said lightly. “The Jedi are a separate body from the Senate. Different ideologies”

Anakin turned to look down at Monian directly, him being much taller than the Senator. “Real Jedi don’t abandon their lifelong principles so easily,” he said in a low tone.

“I must be in rare company. Her every move, every breath, says more than half this room’s senators combined.” Vale turns to you, his mouth curling. “I admire honesty. Especially when worn so…effortlessly.”

You didn’t look away from Monian.

Anakin didn’t either.

His mouth barely twitched and his arms were crossed. You knew that look. It was the kind before he would snap. Before he did something reckless.

But he didn’t speak.

His silence spoke a thousand words.

And for now, you smiled.

It wasn’t only Anakin that was silent but rather Bail and Padme too. Monian’s compliment lingered in the air for far longer than needed —entirely too public.

Bail cleared his throat, “Senator Vale,” he began, his voice measured. “You have always had a way with… words.”

Monian chuckled, “is it a sin to speak the truth?”

Padme tilted her head. “Sometimes moderation is needed,” she said gently, her eyes flickering to you for a second.” Before Padme could continue, another woman came up to her —presumably another senator– and whispered something in her ear.

Taking the opportunity, you shifted your stance so that Monian’s presence was no longer suffocating. Anakin’s eyes followed every movement made, his eyes sharp.

Padme nodded, brushing her hands down her gown to smooth it out as the lady finished talking to her.

“It’s nearly time,” Padme said to the circle. “If you will excuse me I have to get ready to say my speech. I’ve been asked to make a keynote address.”

“Good luck, Padme.” Bail encouraged a politely smiling Padme. Padme, nodded her head to Bail, and then to Vale, and then to you. She then turned around with Anakin trailing behind her.

The group began to disperse their ways as the main event had begun. The lights had dimmed slightly, indicating the start of policy talks and the never ending diplomatic speeches.

Monian stood beside you at the bar, murmuring something to the bartender who placed two clear drinks down between you.

“They only serve these at Republic events. Can’t let the Senators get too drunk.” He shrugged. “Ruins the image.”

You gave him a faint smile, taking the drink in your hands and bringing it slowly to your mouth. The smell of steriliser hit you in an instant and it began to sting you while it made its way down your throat. Immediately, you pulled it away, a scowl on your face.

“How could you drink this?” You cleared your throat, your hand rubbing your neck in disgust.

“I quite like the burn.” He smiled into the rim of his drink.

“Or the aesthetic.”

“You wound me,” Monian said as his hand dramatically clenched his chest, then taking another sip.

You didn’t respond. To be honest, you didn’t have to. Monian would always fill the silence, refusing to let it hold.

Sure enough, his commlink chirped. Monian sighed, a hand through his slick back chestnut hair. “They want me back at the platform. Padme is speaking soon.” And then he took another sip. “They want the crowd photogenic, I suppose.”

You snorted, leaning against the counter. Monian set down his glass beside you and began to adjust his blazer.

“How do I look?”

“Overconfident.”

Monian shot you a smirk and then, he reached out to you. And his hand rubbed your forearm lightly.

“Don’t disappear.” And with that, he pulled away and was gone.

You were alone feeling the burn of his touch on you. You shifted uncomfortably, your back against the bar.

You watched as he disappeared into the sea of politicians that turned their heads, ready to listen to Padme speak.

His touch sat on your skin and you couldn’t wipe it off in public.

Voice’s began to quiet down and laughs died off as Padme’s voice filtered through the speakers — clear, calm and rehearsed. The hall’s lighting had dimmed down with Padme being the center of attention.

You barely heard her though. You didn’t belong here. Even in the dark you couldn’t miss the glances that some people gave you when they thought you weren’t looking.

You shifted your weight, turning to face the orange lit bar, ready to down the rest of your drink and tune out when a shoulder brushed yours.

You flinched. Expecting to see Vale again. The discomfort still there.

But it wasn’t him.

It was Anakin.

“Anakin,” you muttered, startled. “You scared me.”

Looking up at him made your stomach twist. His hair was slightly tousled, like he had run a hand through them one too many times. And his scar under his eye just caught the warm lighting to make him look more rough.

“I wasn’t trying to.” He spoke in a low tone.

You didn’t say anything, only turning so your back was again pressed against the bar. Both you and Anakin watched Padme in her grace and political shine speak.

Anakin’s jaw clenched.

“He’s bold,” he finally said, turning his head to look at you.

“Who?” You asked innocently.

“Vale.”

You let the silence stretch just so he could feel it.

“He talks to you like he knows you.”

You turned to meet his eyes.

“You’re not exactly in a position to be jealous,” you added softly.

“I’m not jealous.” He defended himself. The conversation between you two were quiet as Padme’s voice boomed across the hall, neither of you wanting to gain any attention.

You smiled into your glass. “Sure.”

Anakin’s robes brushed against your arm, sending a shiver to run down your spine.

“You shouldn’t let people like him touch you,” Anakin muttered. His eyes glanced down at your drink and then up at you. You felt the heat in his eyes. Like he was trying to decipher every one of your actions but failed to do so. If he looked at you long enough, maybe you’d crack. And it took every part of you to try and not.

You blinked once. “I wasn’t aware that it was any of your business.”

His jaw shifted. “I’m not saying that it is,” he looked away from you. “He gets real close for someone who only needs an escort.”

You scoffed and gave him a half laugh, setting your glass down behind you on the counter. “I could say the same thing about you, Skywalker.”

Anakin’s eyebrow rose at your tone. “What do you mean?”

“You haven’t left Padme’s side at all tonight.” You shrugged.

“That’s my job.”

“Exactly.”

Anakin stayed silent and met your eyes. “It’s different. I mean what I said,” he muttered.

“About what?”

“Padme. There’s nothing on.”

You tilted your head, “Right. That’s why you answered her comms mid convo with me. That’s why you’re guarding her alone tonight.”

“I answered because it was protocol,” Anakin’s stare tensed. “And I’m guarding her because I was assigned to it. I didn’t volunteer to do this.”

You didn’t answer. He stepped a little closer to you.

“But Monian?” He continued, his voice dropping low and rough again. “He chooses to touch you—talk to you like that.”

“...and we must not allow wartime to cloud our judgement and values of the Republic that we all serve…” Padme’s voice rang out again. You pursed your lips, your hand tighter around the glass.

“I think you’re smarter than that,” he said, his figure towering over you. “To fall for his act. He’s not just an overly annoying Senator but he’s interested in the way you look.” Anakin averted his gaze away, as if he was shy to say something like that.

Shaking your head, you brought one hand up to stop him from continuing. “Okay, Anakin, that's enough. I didn’t ask you to lecture me on how I should act.”

Anakin didn’t blink.

“And we’re not together,” you said, coldly. “Unless you want to debrief me on something mission-related, I suggest you keep walking.”

His mouth hung open as if he wanted to say something else–but he didn’t.

He knew you were right.

“...You could’ve said something earlier,” he said quietly. “Back in the medbay. If you didn’t want me around.”

“I didn’t say that,” you replied. “Just stop trying to act like you still—have this claim on me.” Your voice grew.

You picked up your glass, bringing it back to your lips. “Now, if you’ll excuse me. I think you’re better off tending to Senator Amidala.” Your gaze was locked onto Padme who began to descend from the stage, a roar of claps and cheers were made.

Anakin didn’t move.

He just stared at you.

Like he felt this ever growing desire to protect you and it ached him to see the way that you pushed him. No longer embracing his warmth like you did before.

Eventually, he turned away,

And walked back into the waves of cheering Senators.

He left like he had tension boiling under his skin. Your fingers curled tighter around the drink.

The applause began to fade and Senators began to shuffle around, Padme’s speech already dissolving into the night. It was all noise—the kind that would just pass through you.

You felt tired.

Maybe Anakin was just looking out for you but not after everything he has done. You didn’t know if you wanted to rekindle the relationship. It seemed that his methods to gain you back failed every single time. He wasn’t treating you like a friend anymore. He was just treating you as his enemy and now his pet.

You made a mental note to talk about this with Obi-wan.

The four of you were once inseparable —Ahsoka included. God you missed her. She would definitely be teasing you over being assigned a silly mission like this one.

And then footsteps broke your train of thought. Monian returned and slid beside you, a lopsided smile like he hadn’t just missed the verbal skirmish between you and Anakin. You fought the urge to groan and get away from him.

“Is he always that subtle?” He asked, watching the crowd.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you felt your stomach twist.

Monian leaned closer to you, “the Jedi.”

Your gaze flicked up to him. “You mean Skywalker?”

“If that’s what we’re calling him tonight.”

You sipped your drink, not wanting to respond.

“I always thought Jedi weren’t allowed to get…involved.” His tone changed to a more curious one. “That kind of closeness—it’s forbidden, isn’t it?”

You sharply turned to look at him. “He’s not involved.” You snapped.

“Could have fooled me.”

You sighed. Dreading the night and its problems. You just stared at the reflection of yourself in the glass.

“It’s not like that,” you said quietly.

“You didn’t deny it.”

Your jaw clenched.

“There is nothing, Senator Vale.”

��Doesn’t mean you don’t want him to be.”

You scoffed, your head moving in a sharp moment to look at him. “Really? You ask a lot of questions for a Senator.”

Monian shrugged. “I don’t pry, but I want to understand.”

You gave him a long look.

“You want to understand the Jedi Code?” You asked.

“No,” he said. “I want to understand you.”

Staying silent, you began to bite the inside of your cheeks. There was no room between you two and you wanted to escape far away from him, from Anakin and from this event.

“Then don’t ask about my personal life. I’m here on duty.” You managed to come up with.

There was a pause between you two. It wasn’t heavy, but present. It was a lot quieter in comparison to the rest of the room.

And suddenly, a droid came up to the both of you. He was metallic in colour and just taller than you, holding a tray of appetizers.

“Excuse me,” the droid gave a small bow. “Would you like to try? It’s Nuna cuts glazed in Chandrian sweet-rose syrup.”

“Oh! Don’t mind if I do.” Monian Vale took a serving for himself and eagerly placed it in his mouth.

As it touched the tip of his tongue and then into his mouth, he suddenly groaned loudly in delight.

“Mhmmm.” He chewed on the meat. “You have got to try it, Commander.”

You shook your head ‘no’ to both the droid and him.

“Very well,” the droid said before walking in.

“Wow.” He brought his fist to his mouth, gulping down the meat.

You stayed silent and watched ahead, Senators taking a plate of their own and piling it with their own choices of food. You never really had the privilege of eating such luxurious food as a Jedi. It was sort of part of their code. Delicacies often lead to greed and gluttony.

You straightened your back.

Then Monian, softer.

“It’s strange, isn’t it?” He said, his excitement for the food quietened down. “The things we don’t say. The things we pretend to not feel because it’s cleaner that way.”

You hummed in agreement.

“Since you’re not a Jedi anymore,” he continued, his voice lower. “What is stopping you? From anything you want.”

You couldn’t tell if he was genuinely asking, or if was still suggesting your relationship with Anakin, or if he was instituting the idea of you and a Senator.

You shuddered at the last thought.

“Who said I want anything?”

He smiled, slow and knowing. “Everyone wants something.”

“Okay, Senator…” You shifted away from him. “I think you’ve had too much to drink tonight.”

Monian then laughed, his fingers moving to scratch his beard. “I’ll be at the food table you sweet thing,” he said, stepping back. “If you need someone to talk to—who doesn’t wear a cloak.” Before you could respond, he brought his drink up high towards you and then walked away with a prideful smile.

You watched his back disappear once again in the crowds.

And finally you let yourself breathe. Not one that was relaxed. But rather the heavy, slow breath that hurts a little.

You stood still —straight— just as you had been trained, but your muscles felt weak.

Your eyes drifted to her again.

Padme.

Her gown shimmered as she moved. She had this sort of unmistakable Naboo elegance in every breath she took and every word she spoke. She belonged here. Her words held weight. She could smile and be heard.

You weren’t like that. You had scars. You were rough around the edges. You didn’t have a royal lineage that backed you.

And yet, it felt like he had chosen her. Or maybe he didn’t. Maybe it was the loneliness. She was just a shadow he clung to when you were away. But either way, she was there, and you weren’t.

You didn’t feel glamorous. You weren’t supposed to. You were just a weapon hidden in silk. The kind of girl people could admire from afar but never stayed for.

You used to think that being loved by Anakin meant being understood.

But now? You weren’t sure he saw you clearly at all.

At one point, while Anakin stood by Padme, his arms behind his back like a soldier, his eyes flicked in your direction. But that’s all it was.

Eventually, the crowds began to shift again. Speeches ended. Plate sand glasses clinked. Conversations began to run loosely as the alcohol would settle in.

The music from the band began to slowly die, some Senators would sing along with a few off-key lyrics. Some passionate diplomats were still discussing trade routes, their flame never letting out.

You had made a few loops around the hall since then, you needed action but you weren’t going to get any here. Perhaps in your benefit, mend-gel still applied onto your wounds. Monian had tried to pull you into more conversations, but you had politely declined every time.

You made your way to one of the arching balconies, your hands gripping the railing, the cold biting at your skin.

Speeders floated by like sparks in the dark night.

You inhaled. Exhaled.

And for a moment. You wondered what it would be like to just jump. Not to die. Or to fall. But to vanish.

To disappear into someone —or something— that was never claimed by the Order, by Dev or by him.

Senators began to drift out in pairs behind you, laughter echoing faintly down the hallway.

It was time to leave. You turned away from the balcony and made your way to the lift, pressing a button and the doors hissed open. You stepped inside along with a couple unknown Senators. The lift buzzed and you felt your weight drop as it began to fly downwards.

An individual beside you cleared their throat while another kept giggling to themselves quietly, probably too tipsy.

Once you finally descended, the lift opened and you stepped onto the ground. Making your way out, your eyes scanned the courtyard until you spotted Monian.

Monian’s eyes met you just as fast and you offered him a courteous nod.

“I’ll walk with you,” he said. “Wouldn’t want you to get ambushed by another senator.”

You gave him a tight smile. “I think I can handle myself, Senator Vale.”

He waved his hand in front of you, “Oh, I don’t doubt that.” He began to walk with exaggerated grace of someone trying very hard to not look drunk. But his left step had the slightest drag, giving him away. “Sometimes…It’s not about handling. But being seen.” He leaned in closer to you, his lips curled in amusement.

“Uh huh…” You nodded, not interested in his antics.

You both began to walk down the path, Senators outside chatting amongst themselves, others bidding goodbye and some calling for their taxis. Laughter was heard into muffled distance

That was when he did it.

His arm slipped around your waist.

Tightly.

Casual.

Confident.

Like it belonged there.

Your body froze but your legs kept walking. His arm felt cold yet it burned around your waist. You tried shifting away, subtly but polite.

It was still there.

You brought your hand up to your belt, pretending to brush it off. Hoping he’d take the hint.

He didn’t.

Instead, his grip tightened around you.

“You really should learn to accept compliments, Commander,” he murmured. “And attention. You’ve earned it…” His lips near your temple.

“Senator.” You warned, your left hand met his hand around your waist, pushing him away but he didn’t budge.

“You’re crossing a line.” You hissed. Your voice barely a whisper but your eyes burned.

You caught the attention of a passing politician –just for a second. A woman dressed in a red dress that sat above her knees. Her gaze lingered. A frown. And moved on past you.

“Am I?” He slurred. Too pleased with himself.

“Let me go.” You snapped, your voice dangerously low. Your heartbeat quickened as you felt his thumb brush against the fabric of your waist, your ribs still in pain and now aching from the pressure of hands.

“Don’t be like that,” he said quietly, he was so close to you that you could feel his breath reek of alcohol. “People are watching.”

“I know they are, which is exactly why you should let go.”

He leaned in again and whispered in your ear.

“I’m doing you a favour,” he breathed. “Perhaps people will stop seeing you as a Jedi or a soldier. But as a woman.” He said to you as if he was doing you a favour.

You wanted to take your blaster from your belt and point it at him. But all you could do was stand there— your fingers gripping his own and struggling as he began to push you back. You cursed as he began to use his other hand.

“Take your hands off of her.”

The voice was loud.

You knew it the second you heard it.

Without warning, Anakin snarled and pushed Monian back. He stumbled over his feet, his grip finally free from you.

Monian paused and regained his balance. “Ah. Predictable.” He brushed off his clothes as if Anakin’s touch was dirty. “Jealousy in Jedi robes,” he mocked.

You stepped away from Monian and drew closer to Anakin. Your body screamed with relief with the broken contact but your jaw stayed set. You weren’t going to let Monian think that he had gotten to you.

Anakin stayed silent, his deathly stare never leaving Monian.

Monian raised both his hands in mock surrender. “Easy. No harm done.”

Anakin stepped forward with you by his left and Monian straight away.

He was there, like a wall. Towering over both you and Vale.

Anakin then turned his head just slightly towards you but he didn’t look at you.

“Go wait by the corner.”

You didn’t move. Your hands were still shaky from what had just happened but our eyes moved between both Anakin and Monian. But the way he said it felt more like a command rather than a request.

You nodded and inhaled, stepping around Vale, keeping your back straight and your chin high. You didn’t look back but you felt it. The Force rippled like waves.

“Touchy for a Jedi,” Monian casually said.

As soon as you were out of sight and you couldn’t see him, Anakin moved. Fast.

One hand shot out and gripped Monian by his collar, shoving him back against the marble wall. Monian froze, his breath hitching. Anakin;s face was inches from his face, his teeth clenched.

“You think this is a joke?” He seethed, low and brutal. “You think you can put your hands on her and walk away with a smirk?”

Anakin’s cloak fell slightly from his shoulder while his other arm pressed hard against Monian’s chest.

“I should break your nose.” Anakin spat.

Monian swallowed and gave him a glare of his own. “And here I believed Jedi weren’t supposed to get emotional.”

Anakin’s expression didn’t shift.

“Get angry and make threats.” Monian added, his words clinging to the only thing he had left. “I could report this. Chosen one or not, you land a hand on a Senator and the Council won’t be able to save you.”

Anakin’s grip tightened, his knuckles turning white underneath his gloves. “Report with what?” He hissed. “Your drink-stained shirt? Your slurred words? Or maybe–” his gaze flicked to the corner of his eyes “---the three Senators watching us now? The same ones who watched you touch her.”

Anakin didn’t budge his grip, just like how Monian didn’t let go of yours.

“They look concerned,” a bead of sweat finally slid down by Monian’s temple.

“Good.” He said. “I can answer to the Council once I’m done. Can you say the same for what you just did?”

Silence.

Anakin let his words hang in the air as Monian continued to struggle against him.

Then, Anakin abruptly let go, his hands fell back to his side and he stepped back. Monian clutched his shirt like he could straighten it and his pride at once. Anakin didn’t say another word. Not wanting to spend another second with trash like him.

He turned around and began to speed walk in your direction. To the only thing that had tethered him to the Temple in years.

You.

Anakin turned a corner and found you there standing alone by a window. The moons of Coruscant casting a night glow on your face. One of your hands continuously rubbed your forehead in anxiety.

Your eyes snapped up as you looked at Anakin.

“Did he do anything else before I got there?”

You exhaled and Anakin took a few more steps towards you, his eyes scanning your distraught face. “You shouldn’t have caused a scene.”

“Answer me.” His voice had more weight.

You tilted your head down. “I handled it.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

You finally looked up at him, your arms tight at your sides. “What do you want me to say, Anakin? That you were right? That I was too stubborn to admit it?”

He stepped closer.

“I want to know if he did anything more.”

Your throat tightened, tears pricking at your eyes. “Why does it matter?”

His jaw clenched and fire burned in his eyes. “Because if he did–” He stopped himself from continuing.

“You would’ve killed him?”

He didn’t answer.

Because you both knew the truth.

His jaw twitched and his hands stayed clutched at your side. He was fighting himself.

Finally–

“If he had touched you again,” Anakin began, his voice low. “I wouldn’t have just embarrassed him.” Your lips parted to say something but you couldn’t. It was the truth. It was his honest truth and you knew he meant it.

You turned away, your arms brought up to your chest as you looked over at the city. The lights all blend into one.

“You can’t keep doing this,” you said quietly.

“Doing what?”

You sighed, “thank you, Anakin. Truely. But… Showing up like this–” your hand waved. “--Acting like you get to—” you stumbled over your words. “Like I belong to you still.”

Anakin took another step closer to you, enough to begin to feel his warmth.

“I don’t think you belong to me,” he said. “But I won’t let anyone treat you like you’re their property.”

Your heart thudded in your chest.

“I can take care of myself,” you whispered.

“I know that,” he said. “Believe me, Y/n. I do. But I’m not going to stop trying to protect you because you don’t want me to care.”

You breath caught.

“You shouldn’t care.” You murmured.

Anakin took another step closer to you, too close now. You fully turned to face him and was met with a look of concern in his eyes.

“I can’t.” His voice barely above a whisper. So soft that it felt dangerous.

The silence was deafening. It was both heavy and tense. Mixed with emotions you couldn’t ignore.

Your mouth opened but nothing came out.

His eyes stayed on yours, unblinking and sharp.

You couldn’t speak. Not when his hand was so close to your waist, like Anakin had to physically restrain himself from wanting to pull you close and burn the air between you.

But he didn’t. Because even now, he knew how close was too close.

And still…he moved. But barely.

Just a tilt of his head. A shift forward.

You weren’t breathing anymore. But you felt his warm exhale brushing on the corners of your mouth.

The space between you two had narrowed to only inches. It was close. Not close enough.

Anakin’s gaze flicked down —once— to your lips and then back up.

“You’re not shaking,” he said, his voice low. “Not like before.”

“Just barely,” you managed to breathe out.

It broke something in his face and mouth fell open like he might say your name but he didn’t.

“Tell me you don’t want me here,” he said, his voice hoarse. “Say it, and I’ll go.”

It wasn’t a demand. It was a plea.

You blinked at him. No words came out. They couldn’t. You wanted to but you couldn’t lie. Your body craved him, missed him. So you didn’t say anything.

His breath grew soft against your lips, both your bodies tethered to the floor. Neither of you moved forward. Not back either.

Your head didn’t dare move unless he did first. And Anakin did the same. As if both of you were testing the currents.

Then—

A quiet shift of the force.

A whisper of silk.

“General Skywalker.”

Anakin flinched and his breath hitched just slightly.

You turned to look at the voice. Padme stood, poised and unreadable. Her hands were clasped in front of her gown and her posture was too straight. Her eyes took in everything. Everything.

“Senator,” Anakin cleared his throat, stepping back half a step, as if he was caught in the middle of something forbidden. To which he was.

Padme’s gaze flickered to yours for a second and then back to Anakin.

“Forgive the interruption,” she said, “but the Chancellor’s office is requesting a report on this evening’s security presence. I was informed you were both still on assignment.”

Still on assignment.

Right.

Anakin’s jaw was tight, “understood.” He didn’t look at you and not at Padme either. His gaze was directed at the floor.

Padme nodded. “I’ll walk with General Skywalker.”

His breath hitched, barely. Anakin looked over to you. His eyes searched yours like he was waiting for you to stop him.

But you didn’t.

Your throat tightened.

And then—

“I’ll see you around,” he said softly. Like he wanted to promise you but didn’t know if he had the capacity to keep it.

Then, quieter, almost to himself, “...Goodnight."

Like nothing had happened.

He stepped back, he was forcing himself to. He didn’t want to leave but his own duty was pulling him away.

And he began to walk away, not before he glanced back at you, just once. His silhouette retreated into the night, Padme’s dress and his own robes brushed softly against each other.

You stood there alone.

What had just happened stung your skin and your soul.

It still burnt.

A/N: THIS WAS LONGGG YALLLLL i hope u guys like it as always hehe also when i put a gif of aotc anakin i hope it doesnt confuse u guys its set in the clone wars 💔this whole padme thing will be explained dw guys plz mwa

And not proof read guys there’s probably some mistakes 💔

LMK WHAT YALL THINK!

if u want to be added or removed lmk! Pls if u want me to be untagged u can msg me privately don’t be shy I feel like a lot of the earlier tags had no idea the series would be this long 😭😭😭

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softlymellow · 1 month ago

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queen is she going to get hurt again 😔😔 (😝)

HEHE im about to post so sadly you're going to have to wait and see MWAH MWAH

#anon asks #LOVE YA

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softlymellow · 1 month ago

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WAIT what if reader went and became a sith along with anakin😩I'd die a peaceful women rather than seeing anakins tragic end again💔💔

HAHAHAHAHHAH alternative ending maybe 💔💔💔💔anakins ending unfortunately makes for perfect angst im crying maybe ill make multiple endings one where they live happy the other where he turns to the dark side and one where she joins him LOL

#anon asks

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softlymellow · 1 month ago

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good luck on your exams!! you got this!!

AHHH thank u so much mwah mwah ill let u know how it goes after it passes 😚😚😚😚

#i love u #so cute #anon asks

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softlymellow · 1 month ago

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j so yk m so ready for the new chapter queen. HIT ME LIKE A TRUCK !

ITS DONE BAEEEE HEHEHHEE I WAS WAITING FOR THIS ONE 🤭🤭🤭

#my fav anon #anon asks #teehee

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softlymellow · 1 month ago

Text

The Order Forgot Me First - Chapter 12

☆⁠ PAIRING : Anakin Skywalker x Reader

☆⁠ word count: 4.4k

☆⁠ story themes: lovers to enemies to eventually lovers

☆⁠ warnings: spoilers to swtcw, angstttt and a bit of fluff !!!!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

"I don't need you to fix anything."

It had been two days since you and Anakin spoke.

You were bored out of your mind. The medics constantly insisted that you stayed to ensure you were ‘healthy��. They also suggested that you should make yourself useful and regularly move your body to speed up the process.

And that was exactly what you were doing.

You got up from your bed and took a stroll around the room. Your body still felt a little sore but it was nothing you hadn’t experienced before. You were so ready to leave and get back out there.

Lifting your arms over your head, you yawned, feeling your back stretch. You then sighed in relief as they fell down.

And then the door hissed open.

Two medics stepped inside, one of them holding a datapad, looking stern yet bored, the other looked quite eager to see you. Though neither of them looked surprised that you were awake.

“Morning, Commander!” The eager one said, a smile on his face. “You look quite well.”

You plopped onto the bed, your hands panting down your hair, trying to get rid of all the flyaways whilst avoiding the bandages. “Yeah well, I kind of want to get out of here as fast as possible.”

“Today might be that day,” the other spoke in a gruff voice.

“Finally,” you huffed out playfully.

“We do have to do some check ups before you leave.”

You nodded, ready for them to approach you.

Both medics walked around you gently, scanning your vitals and cross checking your charts with their datapad.

One of them began to unwrap the bandage on your head, wincing as it was still sore.

“Bruising has gone down.”

“Her reflexes have improved.”

“Her upper torso is set to heal at a steady rate.”

One of the medics held your left arm, wiping it down with an alcohol swab. And without warning, they pulled out a syringe from the pack wrapped around their waist. With no hesitation or concern, they injected it inside you.

“Ouch!” You flinched, wanting to pull away but just as fast as it was inserted, it had already left.

“You could have warned me.” You grumbled.

“You’ll live,” the kinder one said as he watched the other throw away the injection in a nearby trash can.

You didn’t smile.

“On a brighter note, Master Kenobi will be on his way to escort you out.”

“Oh. So, I’m cleared then?” Your eyebrows lifted, happily.

He nodded, tapping a few things into his datapad. “Yeah-” He sighed. “-I don’t see any reason why you would stay any longer.”

As if on cue, the doors hissed open to reveal Obi-wan in his Jedi robes, a pleased look on his face.

“Y/n. You’re looking a lot better.” He had a smile growing on his face. One of his arms was propped up on his hips and the other was holding a brown leather bag.

“Everyone keeps saying that,” you tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear, “Did I look that bad before?”

Obi-wan huffed out a laugh, “You should be more grateful, you know.” Obi-wan nodded his head to the medics who stood by you. “You are lucky to even be alive.”

You awkwardly smiled.

“I trust she is well enough to leave?” Obi-wan directed his attention to the pair.

“She’s all yours,” the rather mean looking one said. As if you were such a nuisance to him.

“Just try not to do anything too physically straining for now. Your body still needs rest.” The other spoke in a much softer tone.

You shot him a small smile, “thank you.”

Both medics nodded and finished up their business quietly before leaving you and Kenobi together.

You exhaled slowly, “So much for helping the ‘Republic’.” You scoffed at your own self. “I can’t even do a mission with just a blaster without almost dying.”

Obi-wan raised an eyebrow at this, “You are much stronger than you think, Y/n.”

“It’s nothing like with Dev.” You shook your head dismissively. “We weren’t in a war,” your palms flattened out your medical robes, trying to get rid of the creases. “We just did stupid bounties every day.”

“So two ex-Jedi did nothing Jedi related?” Obi-wan joked.

Rolling your eyes, “I used to argue with him a lot about the fact that he had no idea what it was like fighting in the Clone wars.”

“I feel like him,” you snorted. “I can’t even remember how to fight.”

“Whether you like it or not, you were the one to recognise his force signature during the battle.” Obi-wan countered, hating the way you spoke down on yourself.

“That was just luck.”

“That was the Force guiding you.” Obi-wan said. “Something only a force sensitive individual can feel. Someone like a Jedi.”

You stayed quiet, nibbling on your lip anxiously.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you realised you hadn’t even asked about Master Bulq. “Master Bulq? What happened to him?” You queried.

Obi-wan ran his right hand running through his auburn hair. “He is detained for now.” Sighing, he continued. “Master Sora Bulq was a…complicated case.”

“He has been seduced by the dark side.” He revealed. “Connections to Count Dooku and us. It only explains how he found us there.”

You stayed silent, taking it all in.

“Its scary isn’t it?” You said, deep in thought.

Obi-wan raised an eyebrow, confused by what you meant. Noticing this, you continued.

“People turning to the dark side. People we once trusted.”

“It is indeed.” Obi-wan agreed, humming.

“I just can’t help but wonder who’s next.” You mumbled, looking down at your hands.

Obi-wan remained quiet. He didn’t like wondering about the what if’s, he was always present. Present in the moment.

“Come on,” he said, walking towards you. “Can you walk on your own?” He offered you his free arm to get up.

“I’m fine, Obi.” You waved your hands in front of you, a small smile creeping up your face. “You’ve helped me enough.”

Obi-wan cleared his throat, his shoulders stiffened and his lips pursed. His expression shifted.

“What’s wrong?” You asked curiously, your eyes squinting.

“Have you spoken to Anakin by any chance?”

You were taken back by his question.

Anakin?

“Anakin?” You said out loud.

“He has been…quite moody.” Obi-wan grumbled. “Not that it is too out of character.”

Not really sure what to say, your mouth fell open for a second too long. “He…he did come visit me like two days ago…”

“Visit?” Obi-wan’s eyebrow rose, as if it had been a shock.

“Yeah, I woke up beside him.”

Obi-wan hummed, his hand stroking his beard as he thought quietly.

“What’s wrong?” You asked, watching him curiously.

“There are great many things weighing on him,” he said carefully, “things outside of this war. He’s stopped sleeping again.”

Your throat tightened and you felt guilt settling in your stomach.

“I didn’t mean to make things worse…”

Obi-wan tilted his head, studying you. “You may not have. But-” his voice softened, “-he cares about you. Perhaps more than a Jedi should. Attachment like that…” He trailed off.

“It can cloud everything. Judgement. Duty. Purpose.”

You blinked. “You sound like Master Windu.”

Obi-wan’s mouth quirked, “I hope not.”

Then Obi-wan’s back straightened and he had more of a pleased look as he really looked at you. “Better yet, I have brought you a change of clothes.” He handed the long forgotten satchel towards you.

You took it from his hands and felt your clothes weighing it down. “You went through my closet?” You snorted.

“Something like that.”

“I should report you for that,” you joked, placing it on the bed.

Obi-wan held himself back from rolling his eyes, you and Anakin will always be the death of him.

“We’ll talk more later.” You nodded in response.

“And, Y/n.” He added quietly, like he was a friend and not a general. “Don’t wait too long to decide what you want. Before this war decides for you.”

He then gave you a tightlipped smile before leaving the room. The doors hissed shut and his words were left hanging in the air.

For some reason, the knot in your stomach felt heavier than your wounds.

--- --- --- --- --- --- ---

You collapsed onto your bed and let the silence stretch.

The Coruscant skyline had begun to dim. Casting your room in orange and red hues. Traffic patterns blinked across the sky, all heading somewhere.

Home, perhaps.

You were exhausted. Not that you had done much today. Other than leaving the med bay, your day was spent in the meditation room. Trying so hard to shake off what Obi-wan had said to you.

About Anakin’s attachment.

About your role in this war.

You were so utterly and completely lost.

Out of habit, you reached for your datapad, half tucked underneath your pillow.

Boot-up.

Ping.

Accepted.

You flipped through daily entries. Reports you had missed. Missions that had gone and sent out while you were unconscious and stuck in that godforsaken room.

As you tapped on the tab for your personally assigned missions, there were two waiting in the hotbar for you to accept.

Senate Dinner Assignment – Commander L/n

Diplomatic presence required. Attire: Formal. Status: Pending Confirmation.

Assigned Sector Escort: Monian Vale.

A Senate dinner? An escort?

Your eyebrows furrowed as you realised it would be for tomorrow. It made sense. They would not assign you heavy combat duties this early.

You hummed and tapped ‘Accept’. It might be fun? Who knows.

And then your eyes drifted down.

A single line item. Flagged for yourself.

Deep-space scouting operation – Commander L/n

Outer Rim Survey Route. Arkanis Sector. Pending confirmation.

Priority Tag: Class Delta

Now this one was a heavy combat duty. This was more important than a silly Senate dinner.

Your thumb hovered over it for a second. It wasn’t immediate. It will be by the end of this week. But it was yours.

You hadn’t been briefed on it but you were assigned to it.

You sat there for a moment, your eyes rereading it over and over again. Your name was stamped on it. And it felt good.

This was something you were useful at. It was more than just a mission. It showed that they cared about you even after being injured. That they didn’t think you were dead weight.

Without another moment, you tapped the ‘Accept’ command and locked in your name.

--- --- --- --- --- --- ---

You lied there restlessly. Your body itching to move and all you wanted it to do was sleep. You couldn’t though. It was like it wanted to make up for all of the days lost from training and fighting.

You groaned, sitting up. Your palms running down your face in annoyance. You couldn’t shake off your meeting with Anakin, his apology to you. It made you want to rip out your hair.

Getting up from the bed, you slipped into your robes and rolled your neck, wanting to relieve the tension. You needed water and you needed air.

And that’s what you did.

You made your way quietly through the halls and then outside towards the training grounds where there was a water dispensary. No one would be there at this hour.

The dispensary was hidden behind some pillars, a little further than the actual grounds but close enough where padawans would gleefully jog to quench their thirst.

You pressed on the silver button and water began to shoot out from the drinking taps. You brought your mouth close to the bubbler and felt water rush down your throat, the cool sensation almost making you sigh in relief.

After a couple seconds, you let go of the button, just as fast, the water stopped. Stepping back a couple steps, you wiped away any remaining droplets around your mouth with the front of your sleeve.

You let yourself relish in the fresh air, cool winds blowing your hair ever so lightly. It was soothing. Ever so quiet. You watched the plants swaying side to side in a gentle manner.

Closing your eyes, you let yourself be in the moment.

Panting. The whirr of a saber.

It was the smallest sound. So small you would have completely missed it had you not closed your eyes and focused.

Your eyebrows furrowed as the sounds continued. You made small steps towards it. It came from the training ground. Each step you took, it grew louder. The unmistakable sharp and heavy breathing.

Rounding the corner, you leaned against the cool stone pillar, curiosity taking you in. Quietly, you peeked your head and watched.

Anakin was there, utterly alone at the center of the floor. He was sparring with the Republic issued training sabers, the same ones padawans would use to train at a lower risk. His movements were precise, angry.

His hair stuck to his forehead and sweat dripped down his chiselled jaw, his chest rising and lowering with heavy breaths.

Your heartbeat quickened as you placed one hand against the stone to anchor yourself. You were frozen in place, watching the saber move effortlessly.

“You just gonna stand there?” His voice cuts the silence, low and tired. Anakin doesn’t look your way, instead he draws his saber down by his side, spinning it.

Your jaw clenched as you slowly stepped into view, your arms wrapped around you defensively.

“I was just leaving.”

Anakin then moves to meet your gaze, something inside of you throbbed under his intense eyes searching your own for something you weren’t sure you could give him anymore. “You don’t have to.”

You hesitate. “It’s late,” you murmured.

“Then why are you here?” Anakin challenged you gently, his voice quiet. You hated this feeling. This push and pull. It wasn’t intentional. It was like the Force wanted you to see him. Like it was drawing you to him. Like whatever happened now was necessary and had meaning.

You glance away, pulling your arms closer to you and exhaling softly. “Couldn’t sleep.”

Anakin’s eyes softened as he watched your withdrawn behaviour.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, his voice etched with concern.

You nodded your head and shrugged, “alright.”

“You want to spar?”

You held back a scoff. If this was his way of trying to fix things between you two, it was stupid. There was a look in his eyes, like careful hope.

Your shoulders slumped, “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” your voice distant.

“I won’t push,” he softly says, stepping closer to you. “Just thought it might help.”

“Help who?” You tried to restrain your bitterness. “Me or you?”

He hesitates, allowing your words to sting him. “Maybe both.”

Anakin moved and retried behind him, pulling out another training saber from a rack. He began to walk towards you and then held it out, the hilt facing you like a peace offering.

You stare at it, and then up at the hopeful look on Anakin’s face, and then back down. Your fingers hesitated before finally —reluctantly— you took it.

Your grip on the saber was stiff. You hadn’t played with a saber in far too long. Yet it all felt familiar. You stepped into the middle of the training grounds, your heart hammering. Anakin circled around you carefully, watching you in caution. You fell into your stance automatically, your muscles easing into routine.

Anakin then charged at you, his saber clashing yours with measured strikes. Your movements were guarded, uncertain even. But you grew increasingly irritated as you began to step back, Anakin’s strikes strong. Your breath mingles with him as each of you let out an exhale.

“You’re not bad for not training your saber skills in a while.” He teased.

You furrowed your eyebrows, offended that he would say something like that and joke like everything was okay.

“Who says I haven’t?”

Switching positions, you began to offensively aim to hit him. There was something deeper than just fighting with Anakin. It felt like something more. Like an unspoken apology hidden that was hidden in the footwork. Like he allowed you to hit him simply because he regretted the pain he had caused you. Every block felt like a what-if.

But then, your saber flickered.

You freeze as it short-circuited, sparks crackling from the hilt mid-swing. You felt sudden jolts of pain course through your fingers, the burn sent you reeling in your hand back slightly.

“Shit-” You cursed, the saber dropping through your hand on instinct.

Anakin’s reaction was instinct, closing the distance between you two at an almost instant. His hands reached out for yours, his palm hovering under your hand and the other floating above your wrist, waiting.

“Let me see,” he says, low. You don’t move away or give your hand to him. You just watched and winced in pain.

He gently takes your forearm, his thumb brushing over the edge of your sleeve and his eyes scanning your hands, looking for danger. His touch against you felt like fire and it wasn’t something you were used to.

You pried your hand back, “I’m fine,” you murmured.

“It’s still damaged. Let me—”

“No.” You snapped sharply, your voice full of hurt. “I don’t need you to fix anything.”

He stills. His eyes searching yours. Hurt flashes across his guarded expression. “Let me help you.”

“I shouldn’t have even sparred with you.” The words came out much harsher than intended. You looked down at the saber, wanting to avoid his gaze.

Anakin followed your eyes and knelt down to pick up the lightsaber. As he was coming back up, his wrist comm buzzed sharply, breaking the silence.

You both glance towards his wrist automatically. You felt your stomach do flips as you read the name clearly flash in the dim light.

Incoming Call: Padme Amidala. Secure line.

Your heart dropped and you noticed the way Anakin hesitated. A movement of guilt and uncertainty. He glances up at you, apology in his eyes before accepting the call.

“Padme?”

Her voice slips in through the comms, gentle and warm. “Anakin, sorry to call you so late. Am I interrupting something?”

“No,” he answered quietly, his eyes flickering to you for a second. “It’s fine.”

You audibly scoffed, shaking your head in disbelief as you rubbed your injured hand. You felt cold now. Stepping back slowly as Padme continued.

“I have just gotten word about a Senate dinner tomorrow night,” she says, her voice formal yet tender. “The Chancellor has requested additional security. I thought you may have heard already but Y/n and yourself will be there. It says I would be appointed a Jedi guardian. I suppose it’s you?”

He nods slowly, watching the way your figure began to every so slowly and slightly retreat back. “I haven’t heard yet.”

Anakin was assigned as well?

“Well, I suppose you’re stuck with me again.” Her laugh crackled through the comms.

His voice is quieter this time, “Wouldn’t call it that.”

Anakin’s gaze met yours, heavily apologetic, absolutely hating and dreading the fact that he was having this call with you in the same space. You couldn’t hold it anymore, bitterness boiling in your chest.

“You should finish that,” you said softly, your voice completely neutral. “I can manage.”

Anakin shook his head, stepped forward, lowering his comms for a moment while Padme was still on the other line. “Wait—” he begins softly, the buzzed out saber still in his other hand.

“Stay. Let’s just—”

“Goodnight, Anakin.” You swallowed the ache in your throat. You turned away without waiting for another word from him. Not getting the chance to see the hurt that clouded his eyes. You made a beeline straight to your room, your robes flowing as you speedily walked down the dark hall.

Anakin sighed, his back of his palm wiping away the sweat on his forehead. The only thing left was the broken saber and Padme’s voice drifting from his comms.

“...I’ll send over the itinerary. It shouldn’t be too long —just a few hours of political theatre. You’ll survive.”

Anakin doesn’t reply right away, he just stares at the spot where you stood.

“...Yeah,” he finally says. “I always do.”

--- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Your nervously adjusted your gloves, your fingers almost shaking from the coolness of the night. You stepped towards a window of an empty room. Looking at your reflection, you patted down your hair.

You brought your fingers up to your lips as you fixed up the makeup you had on. It wasn't much, but it definitely was more that you would put on daily.

You inhaled deeply as you stepped back from the window, your attention shifting to the entrance where Senators gracefully walked in.

There was no turning back now. You walked in the building.

The corridor of the reception hall was everything you had expected it to be. It had golden archways and detailing all over. It was flawless.

You breathed in the subtle floral scent from Meiloorun blossom diffusers. There was a live Bith jazz trio that played soft notes in the corner. Droids were moving all around serving senators with hover trays containing appetizers.

Twi’lek senators had beaded veils. Ambassadors floated around. Chancellor Palpatine was seated at the center, draped in a crimson robe and sipping on something from a smooth chalice.

You needed to find Monian Vale. Feeling small in the hall, you walked alongside the outskirts, trying not to bump into the senators chatting —trying to get votes— and the very few other Jedi guardians.

A few of them glanced at you with a knowing look. You had passed two senators whispering.

“Isn’t she the Jedi who went rogue?” One asked.

“I thought she was dead.” The other replied back.

Trying your best to ignore them, your eyes kept scanning the room and your fingers kept fidgeting on their own, feeling self conscious. This was not an environment you were used to.

You locked onto a woman in deep blue regal Naboo silk. It was Padme. Her hair was styled up with golden chains threaded through and her earrings bared her Royal Crest. She looked beautiful.

You felt underdressed. Your hair was braided down and you wore a sleek black body suit but a corset-style armoured vest that had subtle gold veining. Your highwaisted pants were tucked into your boots and you had your blaster clipped at the side.

Looking over besides Padme, was Anakin. He had black formal Jedi robes and gloves to match. It fit him perfectly. Everything about him was sleek and sharp and it fit his frame exceptionally well.

“Y/n.”

You whipped your head around, the voice calm and familiar.

It was Bail Organa. He was dressed in a navy cloak and tunic. His expression was warm.

“I’d heard you were back. Wasn’t sure I believed it.”

You offered him a polite smile and a nod. “I wasn’t sure either,” you joked.

“You’re still carrying yourself like a Jedi.” He smiled faintly.

“Only when it helps.”

His expression shifted to a more curious one, “And tonight? Does it help?”

“We’ll see,” you gave him a hint of a smirk.

Bail laughed and stepped closer. Clearing his throat before speaking in a lower voice, “they sent you alone?”

You scanned the room and your eyes once again settled on Anakin and Padme. “Apparently I’m not the only exception.” You nodded your head subtly towards their direction.

Bail followed your gaze and hummed. “She must’ve requested him personally. It’s not uncommon. Especially not with her.” His voice was neutral.

You let that settle in your stomach as your eyes lingered for half a breath longer. “Have you seen Monian Vale?” You turned back to look at Bail.

Bail huffed once. “He’s been circling around Senators since he has arrived.”

“I’m assigned to him for the evening.”

“Then Force help you,” Bail said, smiling.

As if on cue, a voice came from behind you. Loud enough to draw attention.

“Ah, Commander L/n.” They said, measured.

You turned to see Senator Monian Vale striding towards you, a drink in hand, a smile tucked perfectly behind political precision. He was dressed in brown with subtle crimson detailing.

He looked every bit the Republic that he pretended not to be.

“Senator Organa,” he greeted with a nod. “Stealing my shadow already?”

Bail politely chuckled, “She’s here by order of the Senate and Council. Not to represent your ego.”

“Is there a difference?” He grinned.

Monian turned to look at you fully, his gaze moving down your outfit and body in ways that you almost felt violated.

“I have to say,” he added, his voice low. “The Temple never did you justice. I have only seen you in your standard Jedi robes. This look…suits you.”

You raised an eyebrow, unsure of whether to feel offended or flattered.

“Is that your diplomatic opening line?”

“Only when it works.” He smiled again.

You didn’t return the smile.

Bail stepped in, sensing your discomfort. “Commander L/n is here to keep you and others safe. Not entertained.”

Monian shrugged, taking a sip from his wine which looked like Toniray. A glowing teal drink from Alderaan. “Security comes in many forms. I find wit to be an effective shield.”

“And if anything happens, let’s hope your words can deflect blaster fire.” You said flatly.

Monian hummed, swirling the drink in his hand. “I see the war didn’t dull you.”

“The war has done more things than just that.”

His brow rose in amused approval. “I do love when Jedi develop personality.”

You wanted to correct him and say you weren’t a Jedi but you could not be bothered. It seems every Senator in this building indulged themselves in gossip and rumours.

Bail gave you a subtle look, as if he was asking you if you were okay. Glancing at him, you reverted your attention fully to Senator Vale.

“I assume we will be doing the usual parade around senators tonight?” You asked, disregarding what he had just said.

“Of course,” he lifted his glass slightly. “Wouldn’t want anyone to forget which side they’re on.”

Your mouth fell open to reply but you were interrupted by two approaching figures.

“Commander,” Padme’s voice came about as she approached you. “It is quite nice to see you on duty tonight.”

Your eyes flickered towards Anakin, his attention already focused on you. Ignoring the pang in your heart, you quickly looked back at Padme.

“Surprise assignment.” You nodded.

“Seems the Chancellor's office is full of surprises lately,” she said with a soft smile. “We had only been informed about this event a few days ago. Perhaps to reel in last minute voters.”

You forced a polite smile, both your hands clasped behind your back. Monian sipped his drink, his eyes moving between you and Anakin like he felt something was coming.

Like tonight would be a long night.

A/n: SORRY FOR SUCHHHH A LATE CHAPTERRR!!!! i hope u guys like it i lowk need some of yall thoughts ok so when it comes rots and order 66 and stuff i know how i wanna play it out but until then i might follow the clone wars episodes leading up to it with drama ofc like how does that sound? cuz thats like the only way i could think of how to lead it to order 66 eventually

lowk had writers block and then i have exams in a week so was quite stuck </3 and one more thing do u guys like me doing longer chapters like this one but it might be a bit late or shorter more frequent chps?

LET ME KNOW WHAT YALL THINK ! <3

Omg random side note and rant I have had this itchhh to write a one shot of like padawan obiwan x reader and he’s like sad about his relationship with qui gon UGHHHH

if u want to be added or removed lmk!

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softlymellow · 1 month ago

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What’s ur dni list btw? I wanna follow and didn’t see a list but I wanted to make sure this isn’t an mdni blog lmao

HEYY BOSS I DONT HAVE ONE!!! i feel like most of my fics aren't bad in terms of age maturity and i havent written anything smutty (yet?) so if i do i will def do a disclaimer and stuff and i dont mind anyone who views or reads my page :))) ITS CHILL HERE!!!! IM GLAD UR LIKING THE SERIES BTW !!! MWAH

#anon asks #the order forgot me first

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softlymellow · 2 months ago

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OH IM SO READY QUEEN DROP THAT HOT SEXY ANGSTY CHAPTER ‼️😝

DONEEEE HEHEE ENJOYY BABE🤭

#anon asks #teehee

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softlymellow · 2 months ago

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The Order Forgot Me First - Chapter 11

☆⁠ PAIRING : Anakin Skywalker x Reader

☆⁠ word count: 3.6k

☆⁠ story themes: lovers to enemies to eventually lovers

☆⁠ warnings: spoilers to swtcw, angstttt and a bit of fluff !!!!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

"He finally understood just how badly he had lost you."

Your helmet hung loosely under your arm, your boots scraping against the cruiser's floor, fidgeting. Clones began to move around you in practised order as their voices blended in with the hum of the engine.

You tried to shake off what Anakin had done to you. But you couldn’t ignore the pang in your heart.

As you waited for the LAAT gunship to depart, you couldn’t miss the way you saw Rex shifting closer to you, inch by inch.

Until he cleared his throat.

“You holding up okay, General?” he asked cautiously.

You blinked and offered him a tight smile. “I’m not a general,” you softly said, adjusting your gloves.

Rex rubbed the back of his neck, a sheepish smile on his face. “You could’ve fooled me.” He said, in an attempt to make you feel better.

You offered a humorless laugh. “I’m just here to help.”

“And you’re doing more than that,” Rex said gratefully.

Across the deck, Anakin shifted.

There was a subtle roll of his shoulders, his head tilting ever so slightly as if he was pretending to study the map and not eavesdrop onto your conversation. You caught it without meaning to.

And just as fast as you noticed, you dropped your gaze. Focus on the mission. That’s all you had right now.

--- --- --- --- --- ---

Eventually, the gunship roared as it broke the dry clouds of Saleucami, red dirt and dust flying as you descended.

You stood in the troop bay, your blaster slung across your chest and your palms sweaty. It would be a lie to admit that you’re not nervous. You had fought in battles worse than this but not without your lightsaber. It wasn’t even clipped to your belt right now.

You were a soldier now. Just like the clones. No Jedi robes, no cloak. INstead, you had armour padded fabric and tactical plates. As soon as the ship touched down, you moved.

Cody’s voice cracked through the comms.

“Rex, sweep through the pass. L/n, take the ridge and get eyes on the southern basin. There could be droids underground.”

“Copy that,” you muttered.

Once the hatch opened, the hot air hit you like a furnace. It hadn’t since you and Dev were there. Still the same dry clay pit.

Anakin wasn’t paired with you, of course he wasn’t. He hadn’t looked at you once. He with some of his own troops from the 501st, and you with some of his.

Dogma and Kix were by your back, “Keep low,” you whispered. “There might be thermal signatures by the rocks. Last time I was here, there were big cave pockets that tunnel out.”

Kix gave a low whistle, “guess you’ve been here more than us.”

You shrugged, crouching near some scorched stones and you raised your macrobinoculars. There was movement, subtly but there was movement.

“Something’s moving,” you said, marking it. “West quadrant. Might be droids.” You pulled out your rifle.

And then a separatist droid stumbled into view, sparking, dragging one leg.

You shot it clean through the processor.

And then more.

And more.

The first shots rang out faster than expected.

“L/n, cut off the canyon mouth!” Cody barked through the comms.

“Already on it,” You said with clenched teeth.

Blaster bolts sliced through the air around you. Droids were swarming.

Dogma rolled beside you, “Ridge is clear!”

You turned sharply to look and then a B2 battle droid breached through the rocks and opened fire.

Immediately, you and Dogma turned to duck under a stone, blaster bolts leaving marks on said rock.

You waited a couple seconds for the droid to automatically reload its bullets. As soon as you had the chance, you peered over and fired once –twice– at the centre of the droid. It collapsed onto the ground, dust flying as he fell.

Dogma turned to you, “I-thanks, Commander.” You nodded at him.

And then there was a flash of blue that tore through the smoke beside you.

Anakin.

It was hard to miss him, his saber blazing and his own armour now dusted red. His broad shoulders flexed with every movement. He effortlessly and confidently cut down droids in brutal strokes.

He moved by instinct. Memory. Muscle. He deflected bullets like they were nothing and his saber kept swinging and spinning its own rhythmic dance.

You couldn’t help but pause to watch. You hadn’t seen him fight like this since before Dev. And even then, you were beside him, not watching from the sidelines.

He had a careless kind of confident look on his face. His presence burned and it was impossible to not feel it.

A stray bullet flew past your head, your ears rang as you duck. It immediately broke you out of your trance, and without thinking, you covered his flank.

You continued this until the last droids began to fall. The tunnel network began to collapse itself under repeated pressure. You had watched both Anakin and Obi-wan sweep through the perimeter.

Everything was quiet now. Rex moved past you, his shoulders brushing yours slightly. “Good work, Commander.” He said casually, trying to keep it normal.

You shot him a small smile and a nod, “thanks.”

Cody knelt beside one of the wounded and talked quietly with him.

You swung your blaster across your back. You still felt exposed. Your belt felt empty. Weightless.

Cody then came up to you, his eyes measured but respectful. “I heard that the supply unit will move through this pass tomorrow now.” He nodded to you. “This mission’s a success.”

Sighing, you rubbed your eyes tiredly. “Good job, guys.” Your boots sunk in the hot Saleucami sand, leaving footprints behind.

And then a crackle came in through the comms.

“Everyone regroup at Point Bravo. Perimeter clear.” Anakin’s voice came out.

Rex and the rest of the clones marched towards the rally point. Everyone’s tired. The hot air only makes it worse. Your feet dragged behind you and every minute that passed you would try to stifle a yawn.

You could not wait to get out of this dreadful planet and scrub yourself clean.

Obi-wan and Anakin were ahead now, chatting with Cody and Rex about the mission. You followed maybe ten paces behind them. Close enough that you could hear their boots shovelling against the ground but far enough that you would be forgotten.

“I assume we will have the brief the Senate after this,” Obi-wan said, trying to lighten the weight, his hand running through his hair.

Anakin nodded, “Padme was already pressing for details on the blockade before we left Coruscant.”

You felt yourself stiffen at the mention of Padme.

And then you felt something so small. Something nudging your sides. Something pulling you back. You stopped walking and your boot dragged along the sand.

Something was here. Something was wrong.

Biting your lip, you looked back at the craters formed during the battle. And then you turned your head towards the group that are now increasingly further away from you.

“I’m gonna quickly check something out,” you called out to Rex steadily, who now turned to look at you.

The squad slowed down and Obi-wan’s head lifted to look at you warily. Anakin straightened himself too, his hand instinctively brushed against his lightsaber, his eyebrows furrowed.

He didn’t say anything and lips tightened. His body shifted and his boots ever so slightly moved —as if he wanted to go after you.

Without a second thought, you turned your back on them and headed back to the ruins. Towards the force disturbance.

Your blaster was raised and ready for anything that came. Your eyes squinted as you moved towards the left, behind some of the destruction, out of sight from the rest.

You moved some more, allowing the Force to guide you. Further.

It was like walking through a storm where you couldn’t see, you could just feel. Feel that something was wrong.

Your heart was pounding against your chest and then—

Whrrrrrp

A hum of a lightsaber sliced out from the ruins and aimed for your head. You barely ducked as the crimson blade slashed the air where you had just been.

“Arrgh!” You hit the ground hard on instinct, rolling through dust and dirt.

And immediately you began to fire your blaster aimlessly, hoping that while you fell you landed a shot. The shots were deflected with little to no effort as the saber spinned through the smoke.

The attacker stepped into view, their body cloaked, but their face…

Master Sora Bulq.

Like he was twisted by the darkside.

Sora’s blade readied to hit you but you fired again.

One shot.

Two shots.

Three shots.

Four shots.

And without fail, each shot was deflected with casual precision. Without warning, he struck down onto you. You dove sideways, your shoulder slamming into a rock and you shrieked in pain.

You twisted, wanting to kick out his lightsaber from his hands without getting your arms impaled but he was faster, meaner. The hilt of his lightsaber slammed in your ribs sending you sprawling out on the floor, knocking the breath out of you.

You rolled and your blaster fell out of your hands, your hands scrambling through the dirt.

Pain flared sharply underneath your armour as you tried to get away from the crimson of the lightsaber.

Without a second thought, Master Bulq reached out with his hands and pushed you. The force flinging your body towards a boulder. Your head slammed against the rough surface.

Thud

You couldn’t scream in pain. Your voice hoarse and all air escaping from your lungs.

Your ears began to ring and the desert began to tilt. Light burst as your eyes rolled to the back of your head for a moment. You slumped. Gasping. The taste of blood in your mouth. And then something wet dripping down your forehead.

Your fingers scraped uselessly at the ground, wanting to push but you couldn’t. They had barely moved.

Your vision blurred and the force kept screaming at you. Your eyes fluttered, trying to keep them open.

Then there was a violent shift in the force. A snap. A fit of rage.

Without warning, two figures emerged from the dust with beams of light swinging with them. Anakin dove in, throwing his saber down with full force.

You couldn’t move and your ribs screamed in pain. Your mouth agape as you try to take in small breaths, your head lulling to the side.

Hits and more hits.

You couldn’t make out anything anymore.

Their figures were blurry and you couldn’t hear anything past the ringing in your skull. You tried your hardest to stay awake, your body falling in and out of consciousness in lapse.

There were clashes and screams of laser on laser. Obi-wan threw his own arm up, pulling Bulq to the floor. His lightsaber fell from his hands and his body slumped. Anakin surged through, his saber raised to finish it.

Something muffled. Like they were talking. Or screaming. You couldn’t hear anymore but Anakin was pulled back by Obi-wan.

You couldn’t feel your shoulders or your arms. It was all numb. You fell out of consciousness. And then fell in. And out. And in.

A figure rushed to your side, the weight of their feet made a crunchy sound on the ground.

“Hey — hey.” Their voice, closer than expected. Rougher.

He tried to lift you up without hurting you any further but you fell limp and tired. Your body fell forward and collapsed immediately onto his chest.

Anakin’s.

His strong arms immediately wrapped around you before you fell past him. You tried to speak but your mouth fell open. The goddamn ringing wouldn’t go away and everything felt tipsy and blurry.

“Got you,” he muttered, so soft that it could have just said it to reassure himself.

You let him carry you, lifting your body effortlessly and so tightly that he was scared you would slip past his hands. That you would leave him.

Anakin’s breaths came fast.

His eyes darted across your bruised lips and the trickle of blood that fell down your forehead. His gloved hands cradled the back of your head. Your skin was burning and your armour was streaked with dirt and ash.

“Y/n,” He said louder now, watching the way your eyes were looking at him but not seeing him. “Stay with me.” His throat was closing up and he could feel his eyes beginning to sting.

“Anakin!” Obi-wan called out. “We need to move her to the med-bay now-”

“She’s not breathing right.” Anakin’s voice shook.. His own chest heaving and stray strands of hair fell onto his face.

“She–she…her head…and..her ribs,” Anakin struggled to find the right words.

“We will lose her if we don’t move now.”

He couldn’t lose you. Not like he lost his mother. You were right here in his arms and he wouldn’t let you go away.

Anakin moved fast, faster than he had ever did before.

The hum of the ship faded into static. You weren’t sure what had happened. When the medics had begun to work on you, the cold bacta gel against your ribs. Or when Anakin had finally let go.

If he did at all.

The world blurred. And you found yourself being pulled in. Pulled into a flicker.

A moment straight from the force.

--- --- --- --- --- ---

You were seventeen again.

Right before the war had begun and you were just two padawans

Smiling into your pillow late at night. The temple humming with cool ambience.

Anakin had snuck into your quarters, again. You felt his hands combing through your hair, so gently. Sometimes he would braid little pieces, and they would fall out during missions.

You moved until your forehead pressed against his collarbone, your lips ghosting just above his skin.

“I wish we could be together. For real.” Your voice came out, barely a whisper.

“We are for real,” he murmured, fingers still threading through your locks.

“Mhmm,” you hummed, planting a kiss on his neck. Anakin felt a smile growing on his face, his fingers now moved to tuck the hair behind your ear. He then leaned forward, and kissed your temple once.

You didn’t say anything, pulling back enough just to see his eyes. His amber eyes that scanned your face in love, taking in every feature of yours, his fingers caressing the parts he just gazed at.

You missed this. Missed him.

Your body twitched.

And then your monitor spiked.

--- --- --- --- --- ---

Eyes fluttering open against the blinding medbay lights, you groaned quietly. You felt your scalp tingling and your sore limbs on the bed.

There were bandages wrapped around your torso and some on your head. Your armour was gone and you were in a medical robe. It was hard to ignore just how useless you felt.

Your first mission back and you were already injured on the bed. You couldn’t blame yourself, really. You had a blaster and he had a lightsaber.

Beside you, on the chair, was Anakin. His chair was far too close than you liked. You were less than an arm's reach away from him. His clenched hands were wrapped around his body, his eyes closed with a tired but hard expression on his face.

You didn’t know what to say, if you should call out to him or ignore him.

But the force had other plans. It shifted the air in the room, causing Anakin to cautiously open his eyes, his gaze meeting yours.

Anakin’s mouth fell slightly agape, surprised that you had woken up. He cleared his throat, wanting to find the right words to say.

“I…” His voice came out low.

“How are you feeling?” He came up with.

You didn’t know what to say. There was a right between you and Anakin. Ever since the meeting, it had only gotten worse and the last person you wanted to wake up to was him.

“Fine.” You hoarsely said. Your voice clearly hasn’t been used for however long it was you were in here.

Anakin nodded, inhaling deeply to calm him down.

“You had a pretty bad concussion.” He revealed, “If he had pushed you any harder…you might not have made it.”

You stayed silent, letting the words settle in the room. Your hands absently minded rubbed the bandages, feeling the fabric in between your fingers.

“You were out for a day...Mast-” He cut himself off. “-Sora has already been handled by the council.”

You still said nothing. You didn’t want Anakin to be one to explain these things to you. You wanted Obi-wan maybe, or no one. Just not Anakin.

Anakin felt the tension in the room and gulped, his Adam's apple bobbing.

And then finally, like he was debating against it, he spoke up again.

“I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”

The words hung in the air, his voice rough and apologetic. Seeing you on the floor, your body exhausted and on the brink of death. Seeing someone's lightsaber aimed at you to kill you. It changed something inside of him. He wouldn't lose you like his mother. As he waited in the medbay for you to wake, he swore he wouldn't let himself get angry again at you. He swore he would apologise and try to fix your relationship with him.

He shifted awkwardly, his boots scuffing against the tiles.

“Back at the briefing,” his voice lowered. “I’m sorry, Y/n. I was hurt. I was angry and I didn’t mean to-”

“Angry about what?” You scoffed, a look of disbelief on your face. “You were the one who came arguing with me at the temple.”

Anakin was taken back by the sharpness in your voice.

“Dev told me.” His eyebrows furrowed.

You shook your head confused. “Told you what?”

“He told me that you listened to my messages.” Anakin said. “For the entire year.”

You flinched.

“And you didn’t respond.” Anakin’s voice grew louder but he tried to maintain his composure.

You laughed in disbelief, tears began to prick your eyes. He had no idea. He really had no faith in you that he believed you would not answer him. That you didn’t care.

“You really think I didn’t try?” Your voice broke, water began to visibly well up in your eyes that Anakin felt his stomach twist in guilt.

“I was trying, Anakin. The stupid device broke and I couldn’t relay any messages back.” Your voice cracked.

“Y/n…”

Your chest was screaming in protest under the bandages as you felt your back straighten, but you ignored it.

“You keep doing this, Anakin!” You said, your voice rising. “Over and over!” Tears began to stream down your face, blurring your vision. You couldn’t take it anymore. Even after all the shit you have been through, he had no faith. Even while you were in the med bay bed, there was no comfort. Nothing.

Anakin felt your words hit him harder than any wound he had taken in battle. He watched your body tremble under pure exhaustion and betrayal.

“Y/n, please.” Anakin extended his hand, trying to reach out to you but you jerked back like his touch was fire. And that broke something inside of him. He had hurt you to the point where you wouldn’t even let him touch you.

“And Padme?”

“Padme?” Anakin furrowed his eyebrows.

“You think it doesn’t hurt me when I see you close to her?” Your voice broke. “I used to come to you when we were together,” You pointed a finger at him. “I told you I was scared. I told you she liked you!”

Anakin’s mouth parted, stunned. “There’s nothing going on between me and Padme.” His voice was fast, not defensive but scared. Like he needed to say it before you could turn away.

You blinked. You didn’t trust him like you used to.

“You think I would’ve came running to you the second you fell?” Anakin’s throat began to close up. “I would have left your side as soon as I knew you were safe in the medbay. I would have left for the mission briefing like I was supposed to.”

He swallowed.

“It was always you.”

And then quieter.

“It’s still you.”

You weren’t crying about your injuries or the battle. You were crying because of him. Because of what he had done to you. And he hated watching you unfold like this in front of him.

Tears began to sting his own eyes —fast and hot.

“I didn’t know,” he whispered. “I didn’t know you tried—”

“I did everything I could,” you sobbed. “I was so alone, Anakin.” Your voice cracked.

“And all i wanted —all i wanted— was for you to believe in me when I came back.” You choked out, the palm of your hands aggressively trying to wipe away the tears that wouldn’t stop falling.

“I’m sorry, Y/n.” He looked down in guilt, his hair falling above his eyes, hiding them.

“I know I went too far! It’s just that–” his hands clenched, “-just something inside me — snapped.”

You shook your head, slow and exhausted. “Sometimes I don’t know who’s in there.”

“But Y/n—”

“I-I just…can’t do this anymore, Anakin.” You couldn’t stop crying now, your hands trembling.

Anakin pressed both his hands to his face and dragged them down. His chest rose and fell in ragged breaths. His mistakes crushing him from the inside.

“I’ll fix this,” he said. “I swear to the Force, I’ll fix it.”

“I don’t want you to fix this,” You gasped in another sob. “I just wanted you there.” You wanted him to help you, support you and comfort you all those times the Council spoke to you like you were nothing.

You didn’t want him to ignore you and in anger and rage.

“I’m sorry, Y/n. For all of it.”

Anakin didn’t speak again. He didn’t have anything else to say. He stood up to leave, his hands shaking and his heartbroken.

He finally understood just how badly he had lost you.

A/n: SRRY IT WAS A LITTLE LATE ive just been stuck with Uni labs all week </3 ALSOOO I REACHED 2K FOLLOWERS thxs so much yall im loving this little community on here genuinely i get so happy reading all ur asks and comments.

if u want to be added or removed lmk!

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