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Things That Are Attractive to Read About a Woman Doing...

⭒ Fixing her lipstick in the mirror without looking away from you, like she knows exactly where your eyes are and likes it.

⭒ Running her fingers through her hair after something messy, like she’s resetting herself, but somehow it makes you want to ruin her again.

⭒ Laughing with her head thrown back, completely unbothered, like nothing in the world could touch her unless she lets it.

⭒ Pulling her sleeves over her hands when she’s cold, then slipping her fingers into yours without asking.

⭒ Looking up at you from under her lashes like she’s debating whether you’re worth her time... and you want to earn it.

⭒ Sitting on a countertop, legs swinging, sipping something strong and looking at you like she’s already decided how this night ends.

⭒ Stretching with zero self-consciousness, back arched, shirt riding up, like she forgot you were watching, or didn’t care.

⭒ Standing way too close when she’s arguing with you, eyes locked, voice low, like the fight’s just foreplay.

⭒ Smudging mascara under her eyes after a long night, and somehow looking even hotter wrecked than she did going out.

⭒ Catching you staring and not looking away, just raising a brow like yeah?

⭒ Curling up in your hoodie and making it look criminally better than you ever did.

⭒ Putting on jewelry in the mirror, slow and focused, like each ring and clasp is armor, and she’s about to start a war.

⭒ Dancing alone, headphones in, eyes closed, completely lost in her own world, and you’d sell your soul to be let in.

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Things That Are Unfairly Attractive to Read About a Man Doing...

›› Speaking in that low, wreck-your-world kind of voice that hits somewhere deep in your chest, like a secret only your bones understand.

›› Leaning against a doorway like he’s daring the entire room to challenge him, and the wall’s just collateral damage.

›› Clenching his jaw when someone else makes you laugh, like he's trying not to admit he wants to be the only reason you ever do.

›› Saying “don’t look at me like that” while he’s looking at you like he's already undressing every layer of your soul.

›› Handing you his hoodie, and it smells like midnight and sin and that cologne that haunts your pillow for days after.

›› Touching you like you’re a story he’s been dying to read with his hands, slow and full of reverence, not rush.

›› Whispering something raw and stupidly honest at Midnight. like the dark won’t remember, but you always will.

›› Calling you out so calmly it slices deeper than yelling ever could, because he knows his silence echoes louder.

›› Snapping, just once, and the instant after, looking at you like he’d cut out his own tongue to take it back.

›› Knowing all your tells without asking, like your whole body speaks a language only he bothered to learn.

›› Letting you go even though it’s killing him, because love isn’t the same thing as holding on.

›› Saying “come here” with a voice that makes your knees forget how to hold you up, not a suggestion, not a plea.

›› Smiling for the first time and only at you, like you’re the sunrise after a century of war.

›› Resting his hand on the back of your neck like it's the most natural thing in the world, like you’re his anchor.

›› Standing behind you in the mirror and not saying a word, just watching like you’re the most dangerous, beautiful thing he’s ever survived.

›› Walking into a room and scanning for you first, every time, even when he swears he’s over it.

›› Laughing in that low, surprised way when you challenge him, like he forgot how much he likes the fight.

›› Saying your name like it’s both a prayer and a dare.

›› Looking wrecked in a way that makes you want to destroy whatever did that to him, or hold him so tight it never happens again.

›› Brushing his thumb over your lip mid-sentence, like he’s thinking about kissing you but hasn’t decided if it would ruin or save him.

›› Waiting until you walk away to fall apart, because he doesn’t want you to see that you’re his breaking point.

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So many modern detectives have tried to emulate Sherlock Holmes, and none of them have even come CLOSE to touching Benoit Blanc. That man is Holmes' true spiritual successor. He's a silly little guy. He's gay. He's a drama queen. He has impeccable fashion sense. He loves music. He works with the cops but refuses to work for them. His voice is both goofy and incredibly fun to listen to. He sucks at playing Clue and Among Us. He mopes in the bathtub for weeks when he doesn't have a case. He loves hanging out with The Girls but gets incredibly uncomfortable when women flirt with him. The only reason he can afford his gorgeous downtown apartment is because his husband works a real job.* The only thing he hates more than Rich Assholes are Stupid Rich Assholes. He solved a double (attempted triple) homicide and the thing that made him most upset was plagiarism. He supports women's rights and women's wrongs. He refuses to break the law himself but actively encourages his client to commit arson.

And, most importantly, he and Holmes would fucking love each other. If most of the modern day detectives inspired by Holmes ever met him, he would probably want to kill them with hammers, but he and Blanc would probably end up being penpals and sending each other newspaper clippings about crime or some shit. And I can absolutely envision a teenage Blanc reading the Holmes stories and being like, "Wait, being a silly little gay private detective is a viable career option? Well, I guess I've finally found my calling in life."

Anyway I love the Benoit Blanc movies and I hope they make a million of them

*confirmed by Rian Johnson

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my father just looked me in the eyes and said “it’s a dog eat dog world out here and i’ve got a Milkbone up my ass” cheers man i’ve legitimately never heard that one before

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A "Guy" sentence right here

Shout out to "enunciate" for being one of those words that forces you to do itself.

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*benoit blanc voice* now that is just amazing, mister kira, but you seem to be a lot less bright then i musta thought... we're only broadcasting this program to the kanto region of japan.

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jokes to make after failure that aren’t self-deprecating:

I’m the best to ever do it

Nobody saw that (best if said loudly)

No one’s ever done it like me

I could be President/they should make me President

Behold, a mere fraction of my power!

The public wants to be me soooooo bad

I’m an expert in (thing you just failed at)

How could this have happened to god’s favorite princess?

Nothing ibuprofen and a glass of water cant fix

I’m being sabotaged

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dare i say lasko moore

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You've been "trapped" in a "VR" game for years, learnt magic, had a family, etc. But now they've "rescued" you from it all. Waking up on the hospital bed you reflexively cast a shield. Which works.

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Here’s a video so you can hear the water and the thrushes. I took it for you because you couldn’t be there. <3

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Reblog to give prev the power to write their fanfiction

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I can't believe I've never posted about my listener OCs here.

I can't draw so... picrew to the rescue! (My babies and their tales under the cut)

Morgan "Mo" (Sugarboo)

Whole crazy backstory to get into in a later post. They are nonbinary and don't like to associate themself to any specified gender. They present as a vibe. Only discovered a knack for baking after moving to Willowbrook and getting bored one sleepless night, and the rest was history. 🍬

Pronouns: They/them Age: 27

Luke (Sunflower)

Luke and Mo knew each other before Mo ran away and settled in Willowbrook. Luke suffers from amnesia and has lost most memories of who he was up to a few years ago, which happened to be the last time he ever saw Mo. He is a transgender man who works as a city ER nurse. One floral gift to his co-worker (platonic work wife) began his happily ever after with Finn🌻

Pronouns:He/Him. Age: 26

Daphne (Rook)

Daphne's dream in life was to work in the legal department for some company inside a big glassy office in the city, but it was by a complete accident that she ended up in Auron's company. 💻

Pronouns: She/her Age: 32

Cassie (Casper)

Cassie is a transgender woman who came out sometime after she moved away. Choosing the name in honor of Charlie's nickname for her when they were teens, she was worried skateboarding might give her some dysphoria as it has been her favorite activity pre-transition, but after joining a woman's skateboard club and making friends with other female athletes, she picked it up and even got better. After moving back to the city sector and reuniting with Charlie, the two realized that they're odd hormone-fueled teenage attraction had grown to full-blown love as adults. 🛹

Pronouns: She/They Age: 28

Emmit (Faust's Listener)

Just a permanently exhausted coffeeshop barista who now has a bratty self-important streamer with emotional baggage to deal with. They honestly adore Faust and constantly threaten to "crack that twink's back like a glow stick" but are happy just to watch him act like an awkward little asshole before reigning him in. 🔮

Pronouns: They/he/she. Age: 27

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I listen to Guy's playlist when I can't sleep at night and giggle my way to Dreamland, but with some of the early and pre-relationship audios...I'm not entirely convinced that Kayla wasn't just a newborn vampire who was bitter because she was abandoned by her maker. Living with these two obnoxiously in love roommates because maybe she'd been kind-of-friends with one of them pre-turn. She was constantly bitching because she was fighting through her bloodlust and her new mortality, and watching these two unintentionally flaunt their humanities, and when they finally all parted ways, maybe she searched for other vampiric auras and stumbled upon Wonderworld.

Maybe I'm entirely wrong, but I want to hold this headcanon close.

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dear @ lasko

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Happy World Goth Day

As a goth myself I drew the boys in different goth styles

Auron- Vampire Goth

Faust- Mall Goth

Finn- Faerie Goth

Seth☺- Trad Goth

Alphonse- Pastel Goth

Charlie- Punk Goth

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Do you guys think when Seth and Alphonse were younger they talked about graduating together? Do you think they talked about being those old couples who withstand the hardships of time? About being the couple who were childhood sweethearts,the couple who saw the other and said "yeah they're the one".

But then Seth ran away, That would be Alphonse's first heartbreak.

When Seth came back to take Alphonse with him they would talk about getting out together...they talked about moving far out in the city away from the life they used to live and the life of crime they live in now...

When Alphonse needed to go home but Seth wouldn't let him that was his Second heartbreak.

When he met boo he felt alive again. He felt like a part of himself is back..he felt partly whole(Seth will always feel like a missing piece). He would talk to boo about his childhood (the happier parts of it and some the parts that didn't have Seth. It's cruel..like his erasing Seth from his life but he can't bear the feeling of remembering the happy days where Seth was still..Seth and not who he became now.) Alphonse and boo would talk about their future (and every time it would keep Alphonse awake at night realizing that he'll never have the future he dreamed about with Seth. Now he's talking about the future he always wanted not to Seth but to boo and it stings every time).