stuckinblack-widows-web - Tumblr blog

stuckinblack-widows-web · 6 months ago

Text

ask meee

70 horrible questions ... Fuck it

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?

366K notes · View notes

stuckinblack-widows-web · 7 months ago

Text

in the quiet of the dark

Soft! Natasha Romanoff x Girlfriend!Reader

wc~ 1.7k

a/n: i wrote this a very long time ago when i was struggling with my own mental health. i am getting better i think and this fanfic did help, so maybe it can help someone else

*not proofread*

cw: angst, self harm, fluff, hurt with comfort

Natasha Romanoff hummed a soft melody to herself as she pushed open the door to her cozy apartment, balancing a couple of shopping bags on one arm. The faint, soothing smell of lavender still lingered in the air, and a smile spread across her face since she knew that it meant her girlfriend had probably lit one of the favorite candles, creating a warm and inviting atmosphere. Having set the bags gently down on the floor, Natasha took a moment to stretch out her body, feeling the muscles sore from the day's demanding activities; still, her heart felt light and joyful at the thought of coming home to the comfort of her space and the company of her loved one.

The apartment was wrapped in a peaceful silence, that kind of still tranquility Natasha had grown to appreciate so much after so many years of turbulent moments and cacophonous noise. As she pulled off her boots with a soft thud, she padded silently along toward the bedroom, a smile growing larger and brighter as she caught sight of her girlfriend, gracefully sprawled across the bed in languid repose. The sun, working through the curtains, danced and played upon her placid and serene face while her chest rose and fell in the steady, soothing rhythm of deep sleep. Natasha paused for a moment, heart swelling with overwhelming affection and warmth for the woman she loved.

“You’re truly beautiful,” she murmured softly under her breath, carefully not wanting to disturb the peaceful tranquility that surrounded them.

She tiptoed closer, gently brushing a strand of errant hair from her girlfriend's face, not wanting to wake her. Natasha was tempted to lie down beside her and take a quiet nap but decided that would be better after freshening up. Taking one last look at the inviting bed, she glided into the en suite bathroom, closing the door behind her to renew herself. The cool tile beneath her feet was quite a change from the warm and cozy atmosphere of the apartment, and as she reached for a towel, Natasha found herself humming softly once more.

At that moment, she knew she was doing it.

A small, almost negligible speck of red was showing against the stark whiteness of the tile floor, positioned conspicuously near the sink area. Natasha furrowed her brow in concern as her instincts rapidly kicked into high gear, alerting her to the unusual sight. She followed the faint, crimson trail, her keen, observant eyes catching sight of yet another spot of red and then yet another one following it. A knot of unease twisted in her stomach as she finally arrived at the trash bin, where her gaze fell upon the alarming sight of a razor blade's edge ominously peeking out from beneath a crumpled tissue.

Her heart sank.

Natascha was now crouched beside the bin, her breath catching in her throat as the wave of emotions washed over her. Memories flooded back into her mind—painful memories of her past, filled with all the various mechanisms she had employed to cope, which finally scarred her soul with marks that would never go away. With a sense of trepidation, she reached out, fingers brushing lightly against the edge of the tissue, and in that moment, felt a deep connection. Deep down inside, she knew she need not dig any deeper into the contents of the bin to understand what it all meant.

Straightening up, Natasha took a moment to stare at her reflection in the mirror as a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions swirled through her mind. Her girlfriend had always been her safe haven, the source of comfort that was always there to help make the world less cold and uninviting. The very thought of her having to go through this sort of emotional agony alone was enough to make Natasha's chest ache with a heavy sense of empathy and concern.

She took a deep breath to calm herself down and slowly backed into the room. Her girlfriend was still asleep, peaceful, and that look on her face only made Natasha's heart swell in her chest. Natasha paused for just a fraction of a second before slowly sitting down gently on the edge of the bed. Her hand reached out to gently touch her girlfriend's arm with a soft, tender gesture.

"Hey, my love," Natasha said softly, her voice still calm and composed, though a storm was raging inside her. "Could you please wake up?"

Her girlfriend began to stir from her slumber, slowly blinking her eyes open in a dazed manner. “Nat?” she mumbled softly, her voice thick and heavy with the remnants of sleep. “You’re back home?”

"Yes, it's true, I'm home, "Natasha responded. Natasha was smiling gently, and her voice was even gentle, though beneath the tenderness of her smile lay a thin layer of worry. She waited patiently to give the girlfriend time to fully home her vision to assure this was where she was keeping her focus. "Do you think we could possibly talk for just a brief moment?"

Her girlfriend frowned slightly and sat up. "What's wrong?"

Natasha reached out and took her hands, gently, into her own with a delicate touch. "I… I saw something weird in the bathroom," she began, choosing her words carefully, her voice a fragile balance of softness and resolve. "There was some blood there. And a razor, too."

Her girlfriend's eyes widened in shock, face flushing a rosy shade as a mixture of embarrassment and fear flooded her face. She tried to pull her hands away from Natasha, but Natasha still held her with a light grip, not releasing.

"Hey," Natasha said, her voice calm and comforting in its tone. "It's all right. I want you to know I'm not mad at you at all, and I certainly am not judging you. I just.I really do want to understand what's going through that mind of yours. Will you talk to me, please?

Tears were starting to gather and form in her girlfriend's eyes, glistening as they threatened to spill over, and she looked away instinctively, her shoulders hunching down in a manner that seemed to indicate that she was attempting to make herself appear smaller, almost as if she wished she could just disappear. Natasha's heart almost broke at the sight of her girlfriend so distressed yet, in that moment, remained patient and calm, using her thumbs gently to brush soothing circles on her girlfriend's hands in a gesture calming and reassuring.

"I didn't want you to know," her girlfriend finally whispered, her voice trembling with emotion and vulnerability. "It's stupid, I know it is, and I fully recognize that. But sometimes… sometimes it feels like the only way to cope with everything that's happening around us."

She nodded to indicate her understanding, her expression a fusion of softness and gravity. "It's not stupid," she said with great conviction, her voice very firm. "Pain. it's just the way it is—a slippery little devil that gets us feeling trapped inside its infinite cycle. And sometimes, trying to get out of it, we do things that, at the moment, perhaps are not the best choice in respect to our well-being. I understand precisely where you're coming from.".

Her girlfriend's eyes lifted to meet hers, filled with a sense of question and seeking. "You really do?"

Natasha's gaze, which had been intense and focused, slowly softened as she allowed another layer of her emotions to show. She shifted one of her hands, letting it move from its resting place to trace the thin scar that marked her own wrist. "I do," she said, her voice level but full of earnestness. "I've been there, in that very hard place. And I know how hard it is to open up and talk about it. But you don't have to go through this struggle all by yourself. Not when I'm right here by your side, ready to support you."

The tears welled up and overflowed at that moment, cascading down her cheeks, and her girlfriend let out a shaky sob that echoed the deep pain she was feeling. Instinctively, Natasha wrapped her arms around her, pulling her close in a gesture of comfort while she softly cried.

Not a word was spoken, nor did she try to offer empty words of reassurance that might have been an insincere gesture at that moment. Instead, she just held her tightly, her hands gently moving up and down her back in a rhythmic fashion, trying to convey all the love and support in her heart. As her girlfriend's heart-wrenching sobs finally subsided into a succession of small, quiet sniffles, Natasha took a moment to pull back a little, allowing herself the chance to look deep into her eyes.

"We can sort this out together," she said softly and reassuringly, her voice filled with warmth and compassion. "There's no shame at all in asking for help, and I want you to know that I'll be with you every step of this way. Okay? Her girlfriend nodded slowly and uncertainly, her hands holding onto Natasha's shirt tightly, as if she was filled to overflowing with a deep fear of having to let her go. "Okay," she whispered softly, barely above a murmur. Natasha smiled tenderly and leaned in for a soft kiss against her forehead, her voice full of soft conviction.

"Good, because you're too important to me, to let you go through this difficult time alone." They sat there for what felt like a very long time, the silent heft of the discussion looming in the air between them, creating an ambiance present but not overwhelming or choking them.

For the first time in what felt like ages, her girlfriend could perceive a small spark of hope budding inside of her, that maybe, just maybe, there was a way that things could get better and would. And Natasha? She was the one who wisely and carefully decided to be the solid rock her girlfriend so badly needed at this time, just as she had played that role for her many times before.

Together they would meet and ride out the impending stormy weather—one cautious step at a time—making sure they stayed strong and united.

#natasha romanoff x you #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #self h@rm #fluff #angst with a happy ending #angst

250 notes · View notes

stuckinblack-widows-web · 7 months ago

Text

where she lets go

Soft! Natasha Romanoff x Girlfriend!Reader

wc~ 1.2k

a/n: my first fanfic!! this probably sucks and is definitely not proofread bc it is currency 23:30 and i am so tired. i am so happy that i finished this, and really hope someone out there in this big universe likes it!!

*not proofread*

cw: non really, pure fluff, maybe the smallest bit of angst (sorta?)

Natasha Romanoff stumbled through the door of the apartment she shared with a big sigh, utterly exhausted. The mission was a bitch: endless hours of surveillance, a break-in where everything went wrong, and an edge-of-your-seat escape. She dropped her duffel bag by the door and kicked her boots off with a very audible exhalation, and then the light, lovely smells of lavender and vanilla swirled around her in familiar, comforting embrace.

"Nat?" a soft voice called from the living room.

Natasha couldn't help but smile a little tiredly as she looked over. There was her girlfriend, all snuggled up in this huge sweater that Natasha totally knew was hers. Her hair was a bit messy, and she cradled a hot mug in her hands. Just seeing her like that made Natasha's heart feel all warm and fuzzy.

"Hey," Natasha said, her voice all scratchy from being tired. She propped herself up against the doorframe, looking chill and relaxed in a way she hardly ever did outside of this place. "I'm back."

She sat the mug on the coffee table and hurried across the room. She threw her arms around Natasha's middle, yanking her close with an affectionate hug. Natasha just sort of melted into it, burying her face into her girlfriend's shoulder, breathing in the nice smell of her shampoo.

"You look super tired," her girlfriend said gently, playing with Natasha's hair. "How rough was it?"

Natasha shook her head some, but her nose remained buried in her sweater. "It's done. That's all that counts."

She didn't press for details. She knew better than anyone that Natasha would share when she was ready, and sometimes, she just needed the silence and the proximity to heal from the weight of her missions. She steered Natasha gently to the couch, easing her down onto the cushions.

"Hold on. I'll get you some tea."

Natasha wanted to argue, like seriously insist she didn’t want anything, but the words just kinda got stuck in her throat. The couch looked super comfy, and her girlfriend’s touch felt like pure magic to her tired soul. So, she just nodded and let her head sink back into the cushions as her eyes slowly shut.

When she got back, she saw Natasha all slouched on the couch, half-sprawled out and her head kinda tilted weird. Though she looked super tired, there was this softness about her, a vulnerability her girlfriend totally knew was just for her. She set the tea on the table and knelt beside Natasha, tucking a strand of red hair behind her ear.

"Come on," her girlfriend coaxed gently. "Let's get you into bed.

Natsha let out a groan but gave in and got pulled up to her feet. Her girlfriend wrapped an arm around her waist to help keep her steady as they headed to the bedroom. Natasha's steps were all slow and heavy, totally lacking her usual cat-like grace because she was just so tired.

So, once they were in the bedroom, her girlfriend helped Natasha out of her jacket and totally winced when she saw some fresh bruises popping up on her skin. She really had to hold back the urge to fuss over it, knowing Natasha wouldn't be into that at the moment. Instead, she just focused on getting her comfy. She tossed Natasha one of her favorite oversized shirts to sleep in and then turned away to give her some space.

"You don't have to." Natasha began, her voice muffling as she pulled the shirt over her head. She swayed a little, and her girlfriend was immediately by her side, steadying her with gentle hands.

"Hey, Nat, let me take care of you," her girlfriend said softly, peering straight into Natasha's eyes. "You always take care of everyone else. Let me do this."

Natasha blinked, her green eyes looking all tired and a bit glassy, maybe from exhaustion or something else—like gratitude or this quiet kind of love that was hard to put into words. She nodded, letting her girlfriend lead her to the bed. With a sigh, she dropped down onto the mattress, her body sinking right into the soft sheets.

Her girlfriend climbed in beside her, pulling the blankets over them both. She opened her arms like, "Come here," and Natasha didn't think twice. She cuddled into her girlfriend's side, her head resting on her chest, clasping the fabric of her sweater like it was the only thing keeping her afloat.

"You're safe," her girlfriend murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of Natasha's head. Her fingers traced soothing patterns along Natasha's back, the rhythmic motion lulling her closer to sleep. "I've got you.

Natashas' breathing calmed down, and the tension in her body started to fade away. For the first time in what seemed ages, she finally allowed herself to relax—to be open, to trust that someone else could keep her together when she felt like she was falling apart.

"Thanks," Natasha whispered, her voice barely audible. She gripped her girlfriend's sweater a little tighter, as if she was trying to ground herself in this moment with this person who made her feel whole.

Her girlfriend didn't say a word, and quite honestly, she didn't need to. She just pulled Natasha in tighter, showing her love and comfort with every soft touch and quiet breath. And as the night went on, Natasha slowly fell into a nice, peaceful sleep, wrapped up in the arms of someone who felt like her safe place.

A few hours later, Natasha stirred, her body instinctively seeking the warmth beside her. She blinked slowly, feeling all groggy but still with it enough to notice her girlfriend's chest moving up and down under her cheek. The room was pretty quiet, except for the gentle hum of the heater and the occasional rustle of the sheets.

"Hey, you awake?" her girlfriend asked, sounding all sleepy as she ran her fingers through Natasha's hair.

"Barely," Natasha said, sounding all sleepy. She snuggled in closer, her arm slinging over her girlfriend's waist. "This is nice."

Her girlfriend let out a little laugh. "Totally, it is." She leaned in to give Natasha a kiss on the temple. "How are you holding up?"

Natasha considered the question, her mind flashing back to the mission and the adrenaline-fueled chaos of the last few days. But here, in this moment, none of it seemed to matter.

"Way better," she admitted. "I feel like I just really needed this."

"Good," her girlfriend said, sounding all gentle yet strong. "Because you totally deserve it, Nat. You need to rest and feel safe. You don't have to handle everything by yourself." Natasha's throat tightened at the words, a wave of emotion threatening to overwhelm her. She wasn't used to this—to being cared for so openly and without expectation. It scared her sometimes, the depth of what she felt for her girlfriend, but it also grounded her in a way she hadn't thought possible.

"I don't know what I'd do without you," Natasha said softly, her fingers grasping the fabric of her girlfriend's sweater. Her girlfriend smiled, working her fingers through Natasha's hair soothingly.

"Good thing you don't have to find out." Natasha let out a soft giggle, muffled against her girlfriend's chest. She felt just a little bit lighter, as if some invisible weight had finally been lifted off her shoulders. For the first time in ages, she really let herself relax and trust that someone else could help with the load she carried alone.

As sleep took over her again, Natasha's last thought before dozing off was a pretty simple one, but it made her heart feel all warm and happy: Home wasn't just a place; it was a person. And within her girlfriend's arms she, at last found what felt like home.

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x y/n #pure fluff

319 notes · View notes