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[super-snert]

All I Can do is Give You Space

I told you I wanted to know the truth about how you’re feeling. the answer being complicated, all I can do is give you space in my mind. And for what little it helps, you have a mansion in my mind right now.

[super-snert]

Dropped Papers

You noticed I dropped my Exhibits while I was trying to find An exact phrase to reference And you judge me as disorganized I noticed you.Acting on a misperception I noticed compliments given unevenly and your silence on errors On one side I do not hold against that side the errors they made. I question the ones you choose to note. I did you notice how ableist you were. But I do not judge…

[super-snert]

Propping Up a Body

When one feels this awful It’s hard to remember If this  thought has scrolled a page before I cannot tell you how many times I have propped up a dead body with pills and hope and time. That body a puppet driven By commitment. by determination. by restlessness. by trauma. by fear. Self care is a lie And escape so that the world should not feel bad for pushing us. The workplace is one…

[super-snert]

Don't Let Me

Got me? I get me, Gripped tight enough to bruise. When I am wise-minded and rested I can tell the difference between trauma and determination. Most days I take medication for a sleep disorder. Fighting a battle on multiple fronts, I don’t know how, I pick myself up, My worst enemy is the enemy of my worst enemy, And don’t they say, The enemy of my enemy is my friend My worst enemy is…

[super-snert]

Black and White Done Under Blue Light

Success is ‘done.’ 35 years in, And I see, In a fleeting moment Away from the light, Why I am perpetully blue. An accomplishment only exists for me at its death Because during its life, I am fighting to breathe. Living in that mindless Doorstep of consciousness Blind in the name of survival Too pained and exhausted to be anything close to successful. I am looking at the roots Of my…

[super-snert]

Slither

Based on events of November 17, 2023, and reflections on disability living that resulted.

I remember that at one moment I remembered the women lingering around my connection she keeps meeting my gaze but my mind can’t find her. When she finally cracked and said “fall,” memory began to slither, a snake, dismembered just below the vital organs, I walk, still. and will fall again, and I wonder as I move, not for my fate. Would the minds resting on an able body, and resting…

[super-snert]

Sitting Across From A Ghost

All that comes to mind is, more. More presence in less space. The stereotypical desire of women I am told I am teaching my self over time to grow more acceptance confidence over fear determination over depression to put down these words feels false today rosey and naive and I have existed in this place before just waiting to be swallowed by these hallow concepts but, they lacked…

[super-snert]

May 17th 2019

Low income USA MAY 17, 2019 / LEAVE A COMMENT The quiet tenant who pays rent right on time each month known for her strolls rain, or shine, or snow, or 2 hours post colon removal. Rarely an enemy, often too much a friend deathly afraid of failure, starving to be more than what others see while lacking a mirror. Education sought. but like a jumping CD, the same questions repeat upon…

[super-snert]

Discovering June 10, 2019

originally written 5 years ago

All the things I want run heartlessly knowing my legs cannot follow the aggressive calls, from the stairwells, every closed door that weighs at least 5 lb, the bathrooms, the whole concept is cursed, kitchens are passively out to, at the very least, mortally wound. Everything screeches irritated, “Not welcome here.” not even segregated. Just not welcome like so many categories,…

[super-snert]

The Thoughts That Stop by.

I am wasting time that I could be using To relax, revive The spark of creativity at my fingertips Kidnapped and held hostage By overwhelm and exhaust. I am an organized person, Buried by my chaos of things, Of ambition, goals. Every minute is murdered. I’m not dying, I’m nonchalant. And while a promotion, I am not ready to lose momentum, After finally rebuilding my feet.

[super-snert]

[super-snert]

Performance Diversity

People want to pray for us, Saying that we matter, Playing “they matter.” When. If you look toward the skyline You will see The sterilized woman The institutionalized boy, The “retard” left to die Because it Took too many resources To care. But now because people prey And chant in the name of diversity Few changes have been made, We work just as hard as before, And somehow…

[super-snert]

Suspect Class

No state shall deprive any person of life, liberty, or property without due process of Law, Nor deny any person within its jurisdiction equal protection of the law But, who you are, Dictates who gets deference, And who is protected. And the cover says My disability, Dictates my Ability, Thus, The state can discriminate, If discrimination makes sense. But my disability has made…

[super-snert]

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[super-snert]

Constitutionality

In the Harvard case, the court decided that racism, in higher-ed, is dead. while less than half the students are people of color- a lot, lot less. but, racism, might as well say it is flatline dead. cold body, rotting corpse, dead. the majority says affirmative action promotes racial stereotypes and racism against those who are “advantaged by it” but, affirmative action is a band aid put…

[super-snert]

Seeing Shadows Again

Off behind me, But gaining steam From tears yet cried It will come, And yes, pass too, But the haunting of shadows, Memories, Shoots me every damn time, Old wounds open and weep like queens, Giddy with power over me I heed, Bow, And beg, Why does see you soon Hurt Like death, every time?

[super-snert]

It Isn't Toxic Waste, but It'll do

I made chilli, Not Nalle from a can, But an echo of Momma’s toxic waste masterpiece, However weak the sound. However weak the taste. I am slightly closer to her. And I know the missing will come, As much as I want to ignore death My chilli is close enough to make me cry I want to get it better, But toxic waste is an art, and art takes time. For now pure waste will do