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sweetcherryharry · 12 days

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Begin Again — 03

Synopsis: Harry and Y/N had a secret relationship for almost two years, until they broke up. A year later, she shows up at one of his Love On Tour shows.

(masterlist)

“Your names, please.” Was the first thing the three girls —and a disguised Jeff— heard as soon as they crossed the ‘Staff Only’ door, where another two guards who were on the outside had opened the entrance towards them, recognizing Jeff and letting him in with his companions.

Jeff turned to look at Y/N, gesturing her to answer the guard requesting their names, “Y/N Y/L/N,” she replied, taking the lead from her group of friends.

She knew the routine, she had seen it before. When she accompanied Harry to his first Love on Tour leg in 2021, she never had the need to complete this process since she had a special badge that Harry gave her, letting all the guards know she was his guest and she could come in and out of backstage with no problem.

Yet, she had seen from time to time how the process was; when one of Harry’s family or close friends would attend the shows and they’d meet him backstage, she had the opportunity to see how the protocol to let someone in was.

The guard nodded, writing down her information on his clipboard and what she assumed was the date and time, “You’re whose guest?”

Before she could reply with Jeff’s name since he had been the one to retrieve her and bring her backstage —along with her friends—, someone beat her to it. “Harry Styles.”

Y/N faintly heard her friends’ quiet gasps leaving their lips right beside her, as they had registered Jeff saying that she was Harry’s guest. From the corner of her eye, she could see that both Maia and Natalie turned to look at each other with wide eyes, not really comprehending what was going on.

The guard simply scribbled down, and turned to look at her again, “Do you have any identification?”

Y/N quickly took her small bag in her hands and pulled out her wallet, where she had her ID. Without a word, she handed him the plastic card, feeling her palms getting sweaty.

He examined it carefully, before nodding and scribbling down a few more pieces of information; probably her ID number and birthday. After a few seconds, Y/N was handed her ID back and was given now a backstage pass along with it.

“Next, please,” The guard motioned for one of the trio to continue on the security process, and it was Maia who took the step forward. As the guard asked the same questions (except for whose guests they were), Y/N simply remained silent, looking at the long hallway ahead of them.

She couldn't help but think of the many memories with Harry; fooling and joking around in these backstage hallways.

Harry and Y/N couldn't help but feel giddy with excitement as they made their way down the dimly lit hallway backstage of the arena; Madison Square Garden.

It was the first of the four concerts he had in the arena for this tour, and they had been waiting for it for months. Harry was extremely nervous, while Y/N was extremely excited and happy for him.

As they walked, Harry suddenly grabbed Y/N by the hand and spun her around, causing her to stumble into him. "Heeyy!" she laughed, pushing him away playfully.

Harry grinned at her, his green eyes sparkling mischievously. "I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. You just look absolutely amazing in your tee,"

Y/N couldn’t help but roll her eyes, yet a warm flush crept up her cheeks as her smile grew. "You know I had to!" she said, trying to suppress a smile. She had seen a very funny tee on Etsy, and honestly, she couldn’t help but buy it for herself.

It was a black tee that said “Harry Styles’ GF (REAL)”, along with an edited picture of her boyfriend with pink hearts surrounding him.

It had been a surprise for him, and when it had finally arrived at their home and she showed it to him, he couldn’t help but find it amusing.

He said that she needed to wear it to one of his concerts, finding it would be quite funny that the fans had no idea that the tee was actually true. She was his secret girlfriend.

“Please tell me you’ll keep it all night.” Harry laughed, thinking about how amusing it will be to see his actual girlfriend in the crowd wearing that shirt.

Y/N decided to tease him, “All night?” She arched an eyebrow, and shrugged, feigning innocence. “Well, I guess I’ll wear it until tomorrow, no removing it all night, then.”

And as she was expecting, Harry was quick to catch on to what she was implying. She felt his warm hand push her against one of the white walls, quickly putting one of his hands behind her head (to protect it from the hard wall), and the other one on her hip bone, keeping her in place.

“Do you truly want to start this game?” His hand that rested on her hip bone started to trail up, bringing her tee up with it. He looked at her with a playful —yet lustful— look in his green eyes, enjoying himself quite much.

And as she was about to make her next move, a loud voice interrupted them, “Harry! Y/N! Before you continue whatever you think you are doing, let me remind you we have 20 minutes until Harry is on stage!”

They both turned to look at Harry Lambert, who had an annoyed —yet amused— expression on his face. Y/N couldn’t help but feel like a deer in headlights, caught in her little mischief, as her cheeks turned pink.

On the other hand, Harry couldn’t help but laugh, letting his girlfriend free from his hold on her against the wall, and now opting to take her hand in his.

Without another word, the fashion stylist chuckled and shook his head, before turning on his heel and walking towards Harry’s backstage room, letting them know that he'll be waiting.

Harry turned to Y/N, a huge smile on his face. "I love you,"

She couldn’t help but smile widely at him, too, “I love you even more”

A hand on her shoulder brought Y/N back to reality, away from her daydream. She turned to look at both of her friends, who were now ready to continue on, their backstage badges hanging from their necks, just like Y/N had hers.

“Let’s go,” Jeff said, now directing the girls toward the hallway. He fell onto the front of the group, leaving the trio a few meters back from him to give them privacy, while also directing them towards Harry’s backstage room or wherever they were supposed to meet up.

It seemed that Maia and Natalie both took this opportunity to question their friend, extremely confused and uncertain of what the hell was going on. One minute they were enjoying Harry Styles’ concert, and the next, they were preparing to meet him backstage. All because apparently, their friend knows him.

“How?!” Maia whispered-yelled at her, her eyebrows shooting up.

Y/N could feel her heart beating rapidly in her chest for two reasons. One, because she was extremely nervous to admit the truth to them, and two, because with each step they took, it was a step closer to seeing Harry face-to-face for the first time since their breakup.

“Funny story,” she chuckled, letting out a sigh, “Remember I told you about an ex-boyfriend called Harry?”

Natalie lightly slapped her mouth in surprise, while Maia remained silent, her eyes wide. “So you’re telling me that your ex-boyfriend Harry… the one that you dated for almost two fucking years… is fucking Harry Styles?!”

Without knowing what to say, Y/N simply nodded.

“Oh my god… oh my god…” Natalie continued, shaking her head in disbelief. “So basically… when he stared at you during the concert while he sang ‘Love Of My Life’… it was because he saw his ex-girlfriend in the crowd?!”

And again, Y/N simply nodded.

“I can’t believe this, oh my god…” Natalie continued to ramble, “WAIT! So Harry’s House is about you?”

Y/N shrugged, not really knowing what to say. She was almost sure most of the album (or all of it) was about her, many things in the lyrics resonating with her and their relationship, yet she didn’t have 100% confirmation.

After a few seconds of silence and following Jeff around, Maia spoke up, quietly, “Have you talked to him since you broke up?”

“No, it’s the first time I’ll see him in almost a year.” Y/N shook her head, before letting out a deep breath, and quickly glanced at her two friends, “I’m so, so sorry I didn’t tell you before… I promise I’ll tell you everything later tonight, okay?”

Noticing the guilt Y/N was feeling, knowing that Y/N felt bad for not telling them the entire truth, both Maia and Natalie hugged her from each side. Natalie was the first to comfort her, “Y/N… you don’t owe us an explanation, it’s okay. We’re just surprised, it’s all. It’s not every day that one of your best friend’s ex turns out to be a huge pop star.”

That made Y/N chuckle, and before she could continue on, Maia spoke up, “We love you, and we’re here for you.”

“I love you guys so much,” Y/N smiled, and wrapped each of her arms around their friends, giving them a squeeze. “And please, enjoy meeting him, don’t be biased. Harry’s a lovely and sweet guy, and I know that you’re both extremely excited to meet him. He’s Harry Styles after all.”

Natalie laughed, “And this is why I love you!”

As the atmosphere between the girls lightened up, making Y/N feel much better knowing that her friends supported her, their steps became slower as they noticed Jeff slowed down, too. He paused at one of the doors and turned to look at the three girls.

“Ready?” Jeff said to the girls, but he only looked at Y/N, wanting her reassurance. The girl nodded, trying to give him a light-hearted smile.

The man turned towards the door and knocked a few times, before opening the door. “Please, come in.”

Maia was the first to walk in, Natalie following her, leaving Y/N at the back. Before she could cross the door’s threshold after her friends, Jeff quickly leaned against her, “Thank you for accepting, you have no idea how much he’s missed you.” he murmured in her ear, before letting her go through.

Y/N simply gave him another smile, appreciating the words, before walking through the entrance, holding her breath.

The familiar music of Fleetwood Mac sounded through her ears as it was playing through the room, along with lots of voices engaged in conversation. She was quick to notice where she was; at the “Love Band’s Living Room” (as Sarah loved to call it). It was the room where the band always was in arenas, enjoying themselves before and after concerts, having a snack and a few laughs.

No matter which part of the world they were in, the band always found a room backstage in every arena to make it their own. And no matter what, the room always consisted of a few couches, music playing loudly through the speakers, and a big table with snacks and drinks.

When Harry and Y/N were together during Love on Tour 2021, they would sometimes join them before or after some concerts, and honestly, she’d have the best time chatting with everyone there.

Some things never change.

“Y/N!” Before Y/N could look around, she was being squeezed into a pair of arms. “I can’t believe you’re here! I missed you!”

She was quick to recognize the feminine voice; Sarah.

Sarah was the drummer of the band, and was also one of Y/N’s closest friends, as they would hang out often in the past. They’d go on double dates, they’d enjoy girls' time together, and even Y/N would babysit Mitch and Sarah’s baby quite often.

They never lost contact, even when Harry and she broke up. They’d text from time to time, keeping up with each other’s lives, and always saying that they should meet up someday when the tour was over.

“Sarah!” Y/N exclaimed happily, hugging the drummer back. With all of her nerves about seeing Harry again backstage, she had never considered that maybe she would see the band, too. “I missed you too!”

The two girls broke apart, a smile decorating both of their faces. “I saw you at the beginning of the show, and I couldn’t believe it was you,” Sarah said, making her chuckle.

“I still insist that you should be the leader of the band,” Y/N said playfully, remembering one of the inside jokes that they always had back then.

But what she wasn’t expecting was for someone else to reply to her.

“I think I’m starting to agree with you,” A very, very familiar voice said to her right, and as Y/N turned her head, she felt her heart skip a beat as she looked into Harry’s green eyes.

Harry stood right in front of her, a smile on his lips as she looked at her. Y/N couldn't help but notice how handsome Harry looked, with his charming smile and brown curls decorating his face. He was no longer wearing his concert outfit, instead, he wore a simple white shirt and jeans, along with his vans.

For a moment, they just stood there, lost in their own thoughts as they admired each other.

Finally, Y/N spoke up, a smile on her lips, too. "Hi, Harry."

sorry it took so long! my schedule is crazy but finally, here is pt3 to 'begin again' :)

*it's not edited, i'm sorry if it has any mistakes lol

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sweetcherryharry · 2 months

Text

Begin Again — 02

Synopsis: Harry and Y/N had a secret relationship for almost two years, until they broke up. A year later, she shows up at one of his Love On Tour shows.

(masterlist)

Y/N wasn’t sure what her best option was. She had three running through her mind, trying to decide in just a few seconds what the best possible outcome could be.

One, she could simply act as if she had never read that message. After all, she never opened his texts, she just read them through her notifications on her phone’s lock screen. She could simply reply in half an hour that she didn’t see them on time and that she was already close to her home, and that the show was amazing.

This way, she’d simply avoid what she dreaded the most; the awkward conversation about how they’ve been.

Two, she could simply stay in the pit and follow what he told her; wait for a bodyguard to retrieve her to get her backstage. It wouldn’t be the first time, but the difference was that this time, she wasn’t alone, and they weren’t dating anymore. She’d need to tell both Maia and Natalie about the little huge secret she kept.

They didn’t know anything about it because Y/N had become close friends with them until the pandemic ended and life returned to normal —going back to classes on January 2022— and by that time, she had recently ended things with Harry.

They had broken up in December 2021 and throughout that semester (August-December), she had been traveling with him on his North America tour, meaning she decided to take all of her classes online, even though some of them were already offered to be on campus with a facemask on.

But then, after the breakup, she came back to the California campus for her final semester, ready to graduate in the summer, which she did. There was where she became a very close friend to Maia and Natalie, so technically, she never lied to them about it.

She had mentioned months ago that she had an ex-boyfriend, and how they dated for almost two years before things got complicated and broke up. And yes, she had told them his name was Harry, but that was about it.

She wasn’t sure how her friends would react if the Harry she had told them about was nonetheless, Harry fucking Styles.

And finally, her third option would be to tell her friends that she’ll make her way home later and that they should start getting ahead. What excuse was she going to tell them? She had no idea. And honestly… she knew that neither Maia nor Natalie would want to leave her alone, so this option was almost impossible.

“Are you okay?” Natalie interrupted her thoughts, and that’s when Y/N noticed she had been stuck in her tracks, staring at her screen while she tried to figure out what she should do. “You’ve been standing there for about a minute looking at your phone.”

Maia and Natalie were both looking at her with concern, and for a moment, Y/N felt somehow bad that she was ruining their good moods with her own worries. Minutes earlier, they were thrilled, ranting about the show nonstop, and now, it seemed like the mood between the trio died a little.

Y/N was highly expressive with her facial features, which was both a curse and a blessing, and for that, she knew she couldn’t lie about how she was feeling. But, that didn’t mean she couldn’t say a tiny white lie to lift their concerns.

“Yeah, nothing to worry about,” She shrugged their concerns off, plastering a smile on her lips, “I just got a reminder of something work-related, a few things I need to get done before Monday.”

Maia groaned, “I don’t even want to talk about work right now, I miss being a university student, and simply pushing all the work for Sunday night.” Her comment made the girls laugh, remembering the stress they’d feel trying to complete a whole long assignment in just three hours.

“Stressful times,” Natalie commented with a chuckle, before checking the hour on her own phone, “It’s almost eleven, do you guys want to crash over at my apartment, or do you want to go out?”

And that’s when Y/N decided which was her best option, to leave right now with her friends and act like Harry never asked her to stay back to meet with her backstage. Her past relationship would remain a secret, and she wouldn’t have to explain everything to her friends.

Later in the night, she’ll simply reply that she didn’t see it in time and that the show was amazing.

“Even though I’m just 23, I’m tired already. So much jumping, dancing, and screaming.” Maia replied, to which Y/N agreed. “I’d love to crash at your place and just order some takeout.”

“Perfect,” Natalie replied, and hooked both of her arms with her friends, “Shall we?”

As the three girls resumed their way to the exit of the pit —which was already more on the empty side— they talked about the number of feathers that decorated the floor. It was crazy, really, the number of colors that fans brought to each show.

Y/N loved it.

“Wait!” Maia stopped the girls, and turned to look at them with a grin, “let’s record a quick Tiktok! The one where you stand in the pit with a straight face, and the song Static plays up, and you’re like ‘the concert ended, what now?’”

But before Y/N could say that she wasn’t sure about it, due to the fact that she wanted to leave the place as soon as possible and avoid the bodyguard who’ll come to retrieve her in a few minutes, Maia was already pulling both girls to the barricade alongside her.

In the blink of an eye, Maia had already handed her phone to a random fan who was standing nearby, and the three girls stood side by side. Y/N was wearing her green and black outfit, while Maia wore pink and Natalie yellow.

“Three… two… one!” The girl who was recording them announced to them that the Tiktok was now recording, and the three girls remained serious, their eyes locked on the camera as the girl recording took a few steps back, just like the trend. “Done! I loved it.”

“Thank you so much!” Y/N replied, taking Maia’s phone in her hands. She was beginning to feel nervous, the quicker they left, the less probability there was that she would be approached. The girl simply smiled at her, mumbling a ‘you’re welcome’ and went with her friend, leaving the trio behind.

Y/N handed Maia her phone, and the short-haired girl was quick to post it, typing a quick caption and adding the harrystyles and lotnight5 hashtags, along with tagging Natalie’s and Y/N’s users.

“Okay, now let’s go!”

And as the trio started to take steps away from the barricade, Y/N let out a deliberately quiet exhale, relief filling her body a few seconds later as she finally crossed the exit doors from the pit and unto the outside of the Kia Forum.

But, that relief she felt for those few seconds didn’t last long.

As the girls started to make their way unto the hallway that led to the parking lot, the girl in the green outfit felt a gentle, yet sturdy hand on her shoulder, making her turn around to look for the owner of the extremity, who was now looking for her attention.

Y/N swore she felt her heart falling to her feet as she saw who was now in front of her. It wasn’t a regular bodyguard or another fan that had stopped her —no— it was none other than Jeff, Harry’s manager and someone she had many conversations with (both pleasant and non-pleasant) in the past. He was a friend to her, but he was still Harry’s manager, and he needed to take some decisions from time to time that she didn’t like.

He wore a facemask that covered half of his face, and to disguise himself, he wore a Kia Forum Staff vest, just like the people around the place who worked at the arena. Obviously, he wasn’t dumb enough to come out to the hallways of the Kia Forum with nothing hiding who he truly was, since he knew he’d be surrounded by fans who would recognize him.

“Y/N?” He asked lowly, trying not to raise suspicion or catch fans’ attention.

“Hey Jeff,” Y/N exclaimed, using a low voice too, putting on a forced smile on her lips. It wasn’t that she wasn’t happy to see him, she used to get along really well with him, but the circumstances were the ones that she didn’t like much. “How you’ve been?”

She knew that there was no escaping now; she’ll face her ex-boyfriend after one of his concerts.

Great.

“I’ve been doing really well, thank you,” Jeff replied and pulled her in for a friendly hug, which she reciprocated. He hadn’t seen her in quite a while, the last time had been almost a year ago when Harry and Y/N had broken up. “How about you?”

She could see the concern in his brown eyes, knowing that his question didn’t mean just how she had been feeling lately, but how has she been ever since the breakup.

“Doing much better now.” She replies honestly, making him nod. “What about you? How is everyone?”

Jeff smiled, and even though she couldn’t see his lips, she could see the way his face changed behind the face mask, “Glenne and I have been great, now almost two years since we got married, time flies.”

Glenne was Jeff’s wife, and Y/N loved the woman. The four of them would hang out from time to time, and even though there was a slight age difference between the two women, they got along really well.

“It truly does, I still remember those few days before your wedding when both Glenne and you couldn’t stop rambling about your special day.” As Y/N said those words, she couldn’t help but feel a bittersweet sensation.

She had attended Jeff and Glenn's wedding back on January 2021 and she had been Harry’s official partner to it, yet it was almost like she hadn’t been. Instead of standing by his boyfriend’s side during the ceremony and holding hands with him, she had been on the opposite side of the place, standing alone as Harry held hands with Olivia.

When the ceremony had ended and everyone moved to the party, her boyfriend finally spent the rest of the night with her. Since it had been in a private location, there were no more public appearances that needed to be done, and Olivia had finally gone home.

It was until the party then that Harry was by her side all the time, dancing and singing, constantly telling her how much he loved her.

Y/N had enjoyed that night so much, yet at the same time, she hadn’t.

“Yeah, I remember.” Jeff chuckled, and after a few seconds of comfortable silence, he glanced towards a door a few meters away that said ‘Staff Only’, where two guards were standing, checking that nobody tried to sneak in backstage. “He told me to look for you to get you backstage…”

She felt her nerves increase, knowing that it was all getting very real now. “I know.”

“If you don’t want to meet him, I’ll tell him that I didn’t find you.” He gave her a way to back out of this, knowing that the ex-couple hadn’t seen each other in a very long time, and the last time they had, it had been filled with pure heartbreak and tears. “I’m still your friend.”

She let out a deep breath, weighing down her options.

And as she did, she felt a hand squeeze her arm lightly, making her remember that she wasn’t alone. Talking to Jeff had filled her mind with memories of the countless days they had spent joking around on tour.

Y/N turned to look at the two worried and confused faces of Maia and Natalie, slightly turning her back to Jeff.

“You okay?” Maia mouthed to her, not wanting to cause a scene if her friend didn’t actually know this man or wanted to converse with him.

She nodded, “Yeah, he’s a good old friend.” Y/N gave them a reassuring smile.

Natalie quickly glanced at him above Y/N’s shoulder, and smiled playfully, “If he has access to backstage, tell him to get us Harry’s autograph, and we’ll pay him!” She jokingly (which wasn’t much of a joke) whispered to her.

Y/N stayed silent for a few seconds, knowing that there was a small, deep part of her that would hate herself if she let this opportunity pass. Even though she was scared to talk to him, to see him again after everything, she knew that she’d regret not doing it.

Besides, her close friends deserved the truth about her so-called ex.

“Yeah, about that…” Y/N turned to look at Jeff, and gave him a quick nod, telling him in a simple gesture her final answer, before turning to look at her two friends. “You’re about to meet him.”

sorry it took so long! but finally, here is pt2 to 'begin again' :)

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