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[swingsetsky]

genuinely neurotypicals confuse me so much. or, at least, allistics. like??? hello?? what is going on inside ur brains

people will literally like accuse me of of being manipulative for saying something about how its nice to be understood by someone who has the same neurodivergency as me

[swingsetsky]

I think I've found the easiest way to get through academic texts is to just read them when you're on call with friends. I was dreading reading my like, 11+ demonolatry books until I got on call with friends, because then you can share the weird or cool shit in it and it makes it honestly a fun experience. if you can't call just text a friend the weird/cool shit. it makes it bearable and you have some kind of motivation to do it. I'm still not done with said 11+ books but I got through a good deal of them.

[swingsetsky]

Here's the ADHD Checklist! I finally made it, it's originally from this post. But I've put it in a more easy to read manner.

Requested by: @partykeet I hope this helps!

If you don't know if you have ADHD or not but have an inkling you might, these are important questions to consider when self diagnosing and researching into the disorder!

Executive Dysfunction

Do you struggle with getting things done?

Do you mean to do it and you don’t?

Do you feel overwhelmed by trying to do it?

Do you forget to do it?

Do you feel like you can’t for whatever reason?

Emotional Dysregulation

Are you often told you’re overemotional?

Are you told you overreact?

Do you feel like you can’t control your emotions?

Do you often go from one emotion to the next?

Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)

Do you react strongly without meaning to?

Do you get really depressed after wearing yourself out?

Do you feel awful after someone’s criticized you?

Do you often spiral when something goes wrong?

Do you feel like you can perk back up when that person asks you what’s wrong?

Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome

Do you have a hard time waking up?

Do you have a hard time going to bed?

Do you have very vivid dreams?

Are you aggressive and irritable when someone wakes you up (for like, school)?

Do you struggle keeping a consistent sleep schedule over vacation or summer break, even on the weekends?

Inattention(Dissociation) and Hyperfocus

Do you often zone out?

Do you daydream?

Do you get disinterested often?

Do you feel like you can multitask (listen to music and read at the same time)?

Do you get so absorbed in something that when you return to reality, hours have passed by?

Hyperfixation and Emotional Hyperarousal

Do you have “obsessions” or things that feel incredibly pleasurable/taste good when you interact with them?

Do you have a loud mind that runs a thousand miles a minute?

Do you feel overwhelmed or stressed out by your mind?

Do you overthink or overanalyze things?

Is your head really foggy or thoughts blurry?

Working Memory, Inattention and Object Permanence

Do you seem to have memory problems?

Like you cant remember something someone told you to do (homework, chores)?

Or you easily lose things, having it just been there?

Do you forget that things exist after having them put away?

Do you forget important things like birthdays, dates and numbers, but remember other “trivial” things?

Do you have a hard time remembering the past or your childhood?

Stimulation and Stimming

Does listening to music help you get things done?

Do you need to watch something while you’re eating and get distracted if you don’t?

Do you feel dissociated or distracted when you can’t listen to music or have your phone out?

Do you constantly fidget, shake your legs, play with parts of things?

Do you feel like if you try to stop fidgeting, you’ll feel an urge to do it more?

Do you have a million phone games?

Do you feel like some games aren’t enough to play on their own but some are too much that you can’t focus on anything else?

"Money Blindness" and Impulsivity

Do you have trouble with money when given control over it?

Do you spend money on things other people find pointless or useless?

Do you have trouble with microtransactions?

Do you feel like when you buy something that you’ll have enough money left for things you need?

Are you often broke? Especially if you claimed that you would save money?

Do you often feel like the consequences of buying something aren't that serious?

Time Blindness

Do you have a hard time keeping track of time?

Do you feel like you’re often late to things?

If not, do you have anxiety, and often panic about the time?

Do you often have a hard time keeping a schedule?

Do people say you have poor time management skills, but no matter what you do, you can’t fix it?

Habits, Executive Dysfunction and Disorganization

Do you have poor hygiene?

Do you struggle to remember to brush your teeth?

Is it hard taking a bath/shower? If so, does it take a long time to get into the bath or shower?

If left to your own devices do you wear the same outfit for days?

Do you often look disheveled despite trying to be organized and clean?

Do you often rub off makeup or have messy hair?

Do you try to be organized but no matter what, you can’t?

Boundaries, RSD, and Volume Control

Do you struggle with boundaries?

Do you have a hard time controlling your volume (either too loud or too quiet)?

Do you feel like you’ve ruined everything when someone tells you that you did something wrong?

Do you think you’ve offended people when you haven't?

Do you have a hard time judging reality correctly (like you think you’ve offended or hurt someone and you feel awful but it didn’t bother them that much)?

Disclaimer: Don't say someone who self diagnoses is faking. If you relate to these questions and symptoms, you definitely are not faking. ADHD is a disability that is incredibly hard to manage. People who have it don't like it as they have likely struggled all their life. Being undiagnosed and unmedicated is damaging and traumatizing. Be kind to people, especially if they don't have access to medical help.

[swingsetsky]

Red, Yellow, Green Days

I find most of my favorite ADHD tips on tiktok, tbh. This one not excluded.

With depression and ADHD, I can almost never anticipate what kind of day I will have. On my worst days it is a struggle to do basic care tasks. On the other end of the spectrum the days are manic, where I am capable of superhuman feats. The unpredictable swing makes routines almost impossible to keep up.

Enter the Red, Yellow, Green day plan. Say my goal is to practice better hygiene before bed. This is a daily routine that I usually struggle with. But with this method I set up three standards based on what kind of day I am having:

On Green days: I wash my face with face cleanser, use my medicated cream, maybe use a face mask, and moisturize. I may even apply medicated patches to bad pimples on my face.

On Yellow days: I wash my face with cleanser and use moisturizer.

On Red Days: I splash my face with water.

Having these three different benchmarks allows me to keep up the routine no matter what kind of day I’m having. Rather than feeling discouraged because I can’t do the green day routine (or even the yellow day routine) every day, I can do something everyday. And that is enough.

I’ve seen a lot of variations on this online. Some people use flashcards to plan out their day and mark them as critical (get done even on a red day), medium (for yellow days when you can do the critical tasks and the medium tasks), and low priority (the extras that can be added on top of all the other for green days).

Have grace for yourself and use systems that work for you!

[swingsetsky]

Anxiety Culture is feeling like theirs a barrier between you and the rest of the world and needing constant inviting over and hello's to feel like your wanted

Yeah I get that. A lot of times I need that reassurance of being invited over before I feel sure I can be social/myself. I’m sorry you feel like that, it sucks people have to deal with it.

[swingsetsky]

Way too often. 😞

[swingsetsky]

[swingsetsky]

A thought- since ADHD brains often learn to rely on URGENCY to complete very important tasks since adrenaline is more reliable than dopamine for us, I wonder if that's why we see such a high comorbidity with anxiety.

Anxiety makes our adrenaline response overactive, more prone to the fight or flight triggers that we learn to rely on to complete important tasks. Maybe it's not that we're just scatterbrained and high strung- our brain is just eager to reach for adrenaline because it knows dopamine is thin on the ground.

🤷‍♀️ Just a thought. Because yeah, treating my ADHD has absolutely made me less anxious overall.

[swingsetsky]

[swingsetsky]

Anxiety culture is not just accepting clear and repeated invites to be someone's friend or be in their group because something in your brain wants to ruin it, I'm sorry

It’s alright anon. Anxiety can be really tough with that, I hope it ends up getting better for you, so you can accept these invites with said friends/groups. /gen

[swingsetsky]

Anxiety culture is desperately wanting to be an outgoing person who can talk to anyone and go anywhere and make friends but the closest you ever get is asking random questions on tumblr anon

Introducing the outgoing friend, the friend that does all the outgoing for you and themself /j

But in all seriousness, I highly relate to that statement. It’s really hard to be able to make friends sometimes, I completely get it. I always enjoy anonymous questions, so come here any time you like :) /gen /srs

[swingsetsky]

Once you learn that you’re autistic, it can feel like you’re becoming more autistic than you were. This often contributes to imposter syndrome, and feeling like you’re faking having autism. That you’re only acting autistic because you think you have autism, when really you’re just putting on some act. 

The truth, however, is that you’re most likely just autistic. You’ve learned more about autism, so now you’re noticing all these “new” autistic behaviors that have been happening subconsciously. And if those behaviors are actually new? You’re still just autistic. A lot of times when people learn about autism, they give themselves more leeway to be autistic. They let themselves stim more, they let themselves act in ways that feel more natural. A lot of times this leads to discovering a whole new set of behaviors that you haven’t had before because they had been suppressed for so long.

It’s important to not gaslight yourself during this process. Sometimes you have to take a step back and see if this is you just noticing more because you know what to look for, or if this is maybe you noticing more because you’re not suppressing everything anymore. Imposter syndrome isn’t fun to deal with, so it’s important to try and be gentle, kind, patient, and open-minded with yourself while it’s happening. 

[swingsetsky]

Y'all fellow neurodivergents ever get the Happy Shivers? Like a fullbody shiver that makes your arms/legs (or chest) tingle and you just wanna laugh or jump up and down and move cause your body is celebrating your happiness? Sometimes this happens to me while I'm reading fanfiction, or watching a show I like, or I hear a song I haven't heard in a while--and I feel like an excited toddler that's spinning in circles and clapping and laughing cause all the happy needs to come out somehow.

[swingsetsky]

[swingsetsky]

with adhd, if it's out of sight I forget it exists. also sometimes if it's within sight I forget it exists. honestly it's a miracle I remember my own name

[swingsetsky]

Does all sensory overload feel like pain?

It does for me some times but not usually in my ears (most of my sensory issues are to do with hearing)

If it’s painful at all it’ll be like tension in my head or arms

But other times I just feel really angry or overwhelmed/anxious

Sometimes I just feel like a lot of nervous energy and then feel really exhausted afterwards

No, it's not always literal pain. Exhaustion, emotional regulation issues and alexithymia can affect how overload is experienced.

Ways sensory overload can be experienced:

A "full sensation" in the head, like pressure has built up.

Irritability or anger

Random physical sensations, seemingly unattached to a direct emotion, such as itching, skin prickling, restlessness etc

Physical pain such as headaches, stomach aches etc

Sadness, exhaustion or a "depressed" feeling that is unattached to any physical sensation.

[swingsetsky]

What life is really like for ADHDers:

Constantly feeling like you don't belong anywhere

Never feeling like you are good enough

Constantly being misunderstood and judged

Feeling chronically overwhelmed and exhausted

Not being able to keep up with your peers and feeling like a failure

Not being able to physically relax

Wanting to be productive but being stuck in ADHD paralysis