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#<- just bc they're in a bar i think
barry-j-blupjeans · 1 year
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No one ever told Lucretia how hard it would be to get employees for your supposed-to-be-secret organization. Even harder with the fact that she couldn't even step around it like the Fantasy FBI could. All her opening lines sounded incredibly suspicious. Was she supposed to just walk up to someone and say "so you ever wanna capture those war-starting magic objects that you have no memory of?" She might actually be reported to the Fantasy FBI and that would put a bit of a dent in her "saving the world and stopping the Hunger" plan.
Instead, she had just been just kind of… going up to anyone who sort of seemed like a good fit and tried to make it sound as less shitty as possible without giving them a headache made entirely of Voidfish static. And it was working! Not as well as she'd want it to, of course, but she would take what she would get.
Maureen, obviously, had been there at the start. Lucretia couldn't exactly have a giant moon base without someone with enough money to build the giant moon base. Technically, technically, she was paying Maureen for it and she felt moderately bad about fucking up the economy with her transmuted gold coins (you pick up a thing or two about counterfeit currency when you're on the run from the apocalypse and also living with Taako and Lup), but not bad enough to stop doing it. Besides, the dang thing wasn't even up in the sky yet. Maybe she'd confess after, but it was too important to let out right now.
Then, she had Lucas, unfortunately. The side effect of working with Maureen. But she had other notable employees as well. Killian was probably her strongest asset right now, purely from her role as a Regulator and not a Reclaimer. Her Seekers were few and far between- she couldn't really hire anyone with too high of an intelligence stat, lest her whole plan be discovered. The few Seekers she did have were… well, they were working on it. The Reclaimers themselves… yeesh. It was hard to fill the role without losing too many to the Light's thrall. She didn't want to have a goddamn death trap as a job.
But right now, Lucretia wasn't looking for a Reclaimer, a Seeker, or even a Regulator. Today, she was looking for a bard.
A pathetic bard, if she could. There was only so much nonsense Lucretia could feed Fisher without going moderately to severely insane. The goal right now was to just find someone. No one that would be missed down planetside when they finally got up into the air, no one whose fans would be eagerly awaiting a new release. Just a plain ol' regular bard.
This was the fifth seedy bar Lucretia had visited in the past week. This time, it was in a little town called Water Way, just off the sword coast. The wind was howling when she arrived and it snapped the door shut behind her when she entered.
It was even more grim and disgusting than usual. A group of dwarfs was gathered at a booth, laughing and hollering jokes at each other. There was a couple in the corner engaging in some hanky-panky (that was the technical word for it, Lucretia was pretty sure). The unoccupied booths were still dirty from the last patrons. The barkeep raised a hand to greet her, still clutching a dirty dish rag.
"Here for a drink?" he called.
"Not at the moment, I'm afraid," Lucretia said. "I'm here for the, uhm. The open mic?"
"Just missed it," the barkeep said, lowering his rag. "Though, we've got another in two weeks' time, if you've got somethin' you're looking to perform-"
"Oh, I'm not- I wasn't planning on performing," Lucretia said. "Just listening. But if no one showed up-"
The door snapped open again. Lucretia thought it was just the wind for a second, until she turned and saw a young-ish half-elf in the doorway. He was much too dressed up for the occasion, with a fancy shirt and a poofy hat with a feather in it. He was dripping as if he had fallen into a lake on the way over. In one hand was a violin case. In the other, damp sheet music.
He seemed to realize that everyone was staring at him and shuffled a few feet further inside.
"Uhh," he said. He cleared his throat. "Did I, uhm, did I miss it?"
"I said to be here at six, didn't I?" the barkeep said, sounding faintly annoyed. "Can you tell time, Johann?"
"Uh, yeah," he said. "I just, uhm, got… sidetracked."
"You look like you fell in the ocean," the barkeep said.
"You're not- you're not super far off-"
"It doesn't matter where you were," the barkeep said. "It's nine now, anyhow. No more open mic."
"It's not like we're missin' much!" one of the dwarfs' hollered. Johann winced, and the barkeeper ignored the comment completely.
"But I wrote a good one this time," Johann said, holding up the soggy sheet music. Lucretia could see him blush in the dim light. "I- I can do it without the sheet music. I have it memorized."
"Two weeks," the barkeep said like they had had this conversation several times before. "Be on time. You want a cuppa?"
Johann looked torn for a second, but ultimately sludged up to the bar. He deposited his violin case on the counter and his soggy sheet music fell on top of it with a splat.
"Actually," Lucretia said, "I would like a drink."
"Atta girl," the barkeep said. Lucretia grimaced but went to sit anyway. She took the stool next to Johann, who was slumped over the bar. "What'd'you want?"
"Cider," Johann said, with the emotion of a depressed seal.
"I'll take a cider, as well," Lucretia said. Johann glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. The barkeep nodded and set the rag over his shoulder, disappearing into the back room. The gaggle of dwarves chattered on across the room. Lucretia tapped her fingers against the bar. Eventually, she built up the confidence to say, "so you play the violin?"
"I'm not interested in a hookup, lady," Johann said.
"Oh, fuck no," Lucretia said. "Sorry- no. You're- gods, no."
"Uhm," Johann said. Okay, okay, okay, back on track Lucretia.
"I'm just- I'm trying to find a bard for an… organization I'm forming," Lucretia said, a little bit quieter. Secretive. Cool. Collected. Join my secret shitty moon organization, please? "I figured an open mic would be a good place to start, but I was a little too late, it seems. If you still wanted to perform, I wouldn't mind seeing what you can do."
"…you're choosing all the wrong words for convincing me this isn't a hookup," Johann said, squinting at her.
"It's not," Lucretia said shortly. "That- again, sorry, no thanks. Can I- how would you like to help save the world? Is that a better opener?"
"Cheesy, but a little better," Johann said. He sit up a little and his hat dripped water onto the bar. "Save the world how, though? I'm not gonna be joining some- some Fantasy Avengers shit, lady, I got stuff to do. You see these arms?" He held out his arm, which was dripping wet and skinny as a starved kitten. "I'm not exactly Iron Man over here, you can't expect me to be some kind of musical tank."
"Not at all," Lucretia said. She vaguely wondered if this is how Davenport felt, hiring her. No, that train of thought wasn't productive at all. She needed more gravitas. That would fix all her problems. "All I need you to do is write."
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shorthaltsjester · 9 months
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the mighty nein - critical role
this is a place where i don't feel alone. this is a place where i feel at home.
#also with softer vibes. i offer They#every silly little brainheart found family deserves a to build a home edit#the mighty nein maybe most of all. thats my family#also the lyrics deliciously well suited to m9.#when jester pulls that. stupid tarot card for fjord. home or traveler. and there's a carnival wagon. and veth says Thats Us! . them#i just think about . the tower is their home the xhorhouse is their home the lavish chateau is their home the balleater. the mistake.#the nein heroez. veth and yezas apartment. the dome. fjord and jesters living room floor.#a bar with a silly name on rumblecusp#also like. the song has stone and dust imagery. gardens and trees.#the inherent temporality of life and love and how that holds no bearing on how greatly people can love. im losin it okay.#ive been making this edit for days straight with my computer screaming at me for trying to shove 143 episodes of cr into a 2min20sec video.#crying becuase. theyre a family do you get it. they were nine lonely people and most of them had given up on seeing their own lives#as something that might be good. something that might make the world a better place. and in the end they're heroes.#and it doesn't matter if no one else knows because They know they're heroes. and they wouldn't've believed that was true when they met.#rattling the bars of my enclosure. to be loved is to be changed#posted on twitter and want to get in the habit of posting here too bc.#general reasons but also bc . i have noticed some of the ppl liking/sharing it are also ppl who shit on my ops by vaguing about my posts#which is in general whatever but does leave a funny taste in my mouth.#critical role#the mighty nein#cr2#caleb widogast#caduceus clay#jester lavorre#fjord#veth brenatto#yasha nydoorin#beauregard lionett#mollymauk tealeaf#my posts
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sorry sorry last time I'm talking about huskerdust tonight but does it fuck anyone else up knowing that Husk and Angel basically lived at the same time but were on opposite sides of the country. But also Husk went traveling. Like these two could have met while they were alive and wouldn't even know it. They didn't even know the other existed until they met at the hotel
Like I have. so many thoughts about this.
#hazbin hotel#Husk#Angel Dust#gods imagine how different things would have turned out for both of them if they'd met while alive#well I say that but they were deeper in their vices then than they are now so...... maybe they'd have made each other worse#or maybe they could have saved each other who knows#also just thinking about the idea of Husk and Angel meeting at a bar in New York back when they were alive#like not even knowing it was each other but having met and spent a night drinking in a bar together talking#maybe Angel was going around flirting for free drinks and Husk was waiting to board a ship to who knows where#and they're both neck deep in their own vices but Husk tries to give Angel some advice anyway (we dk if Husk's morals developed in Hell#when he lost his status or are remnants of his human life but I like to imagine he was a decent man who made a string of bad choices#we also don't know what kind of Overlord he was. for all we know the worst thing he did was bet souls so we dunno if he was cruel/immoral)#but Angel not heeding his advice bc who's gonna listen to an alcoholic amirite but he was fun to talk to and bought him drinks so#and them parting ways without even so much as learning the other's name. and all this happening just days before Angel dies#Husk doesn't even think about him again cuz he was just some dude at a bar and barely remembering bc it was ~20 years before he died#but Angel vividly remembering it bc it was one of the last memorable days leading up to his death#anyway thanks for listening to me ramble orz
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proton-wobbler · 7 months
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So no clue what the phenomenon is called, but I've got that thing of "whenever you hear noises you have to repeat them" thing that some ADHD people have. It's not an always thing for me, but I do it A Lot when I'm out birding. I'm no good at it, of course, as I have a human mouth and no syrinx (a bird's voicebox), but that doesn't stop the chickadees from thinking some kid-chickadee is singing really badly in their territory, as chickadees love to throw down.
The problem is when you repeat a Barred Owl song (because ohmygod their song is amazing!) and the male of the pair thinks you sound juuuuuuuuust enough like an owl that he decides to scope your location. The amount of impulse control you gain when faced with the fact an owl would gladly smack the back of your head for singing terribly is incredible.
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jarrodsbowen · 24 days
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do you reckon people hate watch west ham...
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septembersghost · 2 years
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Nom Kinnear King
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willowser · 11 months
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honestly if i had a bigger brain, i would write an entire android shouto fic
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musicalchaos07 · 1 month
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nancy & mike or el & joyce?
Em, I invite you to my home for a nice sleepover and this is how you repay me??? (It's Nancy & Mike full stop. So sorry to mother-daughter of all time)
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itstheheebiejeebies · 2 months
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okay so funny thing i've noticed
Buck always sits on the left in the plane, always. it even gets mentioned multiple times
but when he's with just Bucky? He's almost always on his right (stage right style, his left to bucky's right side)
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mattodore · 5 months
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probably the most important tests i've taken for mattodore 🧑‍💻
#theo's on the left and matthias is on the right btw... though i think you can tell that just based on the percentage bars 😭#matthias fr just likes everything. love my little hedonist <333#river dipping#theodore doe#matthias evanoff#echthroi#oc extras#uh.....#nsft#...??? idk they're words on a screen but just in case#the 41% non-monogamist vs. 81%... lol#idk if i mentioned this before but while mattodore are monogamist they do still have sex with other people together#but bc of how jealous theo is the threesomes they have have a general no-touch rule wrt matthias#like he's entirely off limits to their third. theo is very strict abt this too... he'll be immediately taken out of a scene#if a hand even grazes matthias's skin... which is funny considering they mostly have threesomes with women anyway bc of his jealousy#and yet he still reacts poorly. like theo knows matthias is gay it's just that he's jealous in a completely irrational way#matthias likes it tho <3 it pleases him like nothing else to watch theo snap at someone not to touch him. like he's rock solid every time 🤷#guy whose jealousy meter is always at zero vs. guy whose jealous meter is always at a hundred... incredible dynamic imo#anyway......... i edited two other screenshots too but they're just for me <3 and i think i'm getting tired now#so i'm going to try to sleep. i'm counting on this jerma stream to keep my brain busy until i pass out.#if that doesn't work then i'll be scooping out my brain w/ a spoon as an alternative
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a-partofthemob · 2 years
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very important question but also kinda not to me its very important so, how does an esper teleport
what do they think when they teleport, they meaning shimazaki bc hes the only teleporter in mob psycho 100. at first i thought like, do they visualize the place in an image sense and remembered shimazaki's blind, so does he think of where he wants to go? like to a person or specific place? does he need to think of something specific?
funnier thing, if shimazaki's first experience in teleportation was an accident, how confused would he have been. like hes just walking arnd going about his day and thinks, "man I really wanna go to the park" or something and suddenly he walks into the monkey bars
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fiendishartist2 · 1 month
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guys what if i want to make my own apollo justice game.
#i need to write a prequel to aa4 pls pls pls pls pls#okay get this: so phoenix isnt disbarred yet and he doesnt have trucy. hes still taking and winning cases#one day he gets a call from edgeworth and hes all like ''wright i need your assistance'' and hes like what for and edgeworth goes#''ive been given the most ridiculous case and i think youre the only man in law who can take care of it''#so phoenix bikes his ass to the detention center and boom. child behind bars#and phoenix is like ??? hey kid what are doing here. and this kid is the most surly mfer on the planet like you couldnt get-#-a word out of him if you tried. hes kinda giving phoenix the stink eye too but hes just the littlest guy on earth#and phoenix feels bad for him so he tries to get a rundown of the case (maybe edgeworth gave him an autopsy report or smth beforehand)#but get this. the kid still wont speak. he hasnt even moved a muscle. and after some prodding you find out this little dude-#-doesnt speak english (i dont love aa6 but i think apollos tragic backstory can be interesting so we're going w that but taking it seriousl#anyways so maya is like omg this kid is speaking khurainese but hers is kinda broken bc shes not from the mainland and only knows it-#-from like prayers#so you only get bits and pieces of the kids testimony. plus he still doesnt wanna talk bc ''dhurk told me not to talk to you''#so you start following the new lead but you ask too many questions and apollos like oh shit i said too much and wont talk to you anymore#but now you have two leads: khur'ain and a man named ''dhurk'' plus the fact that this is kid might be new to america since-#-he cant speak english but is smack dab in the middle of california. its all v curious and phoenix wants to get to the bottom of it#for the rest of the case i feel like it would go in the direction of ''we dont know exactly whats up w this dhurk guy or where this kid-#-came from but we do get him acquitted and phoenix is able to save him from the dark path he was heading towards'' thus steering apollo-#-in the direction of law and giving him a wayyyy better reason than aa6 gave him <3#i kind of like the interlinked nature of ace attorney's storytelling. like everything leads into smth else and everyone is impacted-#-by another person before they even become properly entangled w each other's lives#like how mia faced dahlia years before she met phoenix but dahlia was the one to connect them#or how trucy gave phoenix the diary paper but she's also the one who ropes apollo into the waa. even before they know they're siblings#or how lamoire left apollo and trucy as children and when they reunite as adults they cant recognise each other but they all find each-#-other anyways#i could go on but i think this could be cool yknow esp bc i think the most interesting thing about apollo's aa6 backstory is his life-#-post dhurk. like where did he stay? was he a foster kid? was he put into the system? how did that affect him? what kind of ppl took him in#i just wanna know how that whole thing would have effected him bc like when yiu think about it how did he even get to america?? his dad's#-considered a terrorist. idk man i think its interesting and apollo and dhurks interactions are one of the only good parts of aa6
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spicypussywave · 4 months
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I just thought about how Sailom’s first time was with Kanghan and it made me cry 😭
i'll give you another reason to cry, it was kang's first time too. they're each other's first everything. and (probably) last too.
#dr#anon#asks#naomivents#anon you sent me at night but now it's morning and i'm crying thank you <3#i don't think the kang who was crushing on pimfah ever got laid lmao#sailom really got the only guy he ever wanted effortlessly#king shit good for him#ngl i'm not a fan of the marrying your first and only relationship as a concept#not against it. i just don't prefer that#it's a me thing lol#But. if these two don't end up marrying i will be shocked#the way these two are rn. i don't see any other possibilities#they're teens they make Stupid decisions#but i feel like they're mature enough to understand each other?#kang can get obsessive (in ways that can be seen as red flag irl) and that will grow the more they are together#and i feel like sailom will start being vocal or atleast leave hints on how much he Likes that#look i don't have much to go on with other than stalker kang#“my kinda ex is stalking me bc he wants me back uwu” <- sailom#and! ballroom dance at bar#never forget. kang getting in trouble to save their friend turned him on#sailom clearly liked those mf insane as well#they know what the other wants and that's gonna grow the more They grow yk?#i feel like sailom likes the insane actions bc he knows that's one way of kang expressing his care for him. and he is right lbh#and he's a little insane too so there's that#and that's why i feel like no matter what they have to go through. they're gonna do it together#or apart but still end up together. like ep 10#this is the kangsailom in my head lmao not sure how much of this is made up by me but yeah#i didn't know i had these many thoughts so appreciate the ask tho i dont think this is what you wanted 😭
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joanthangroff · 5 months
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why didn't bar and len become engaged in the gcau :(
hm, i don't really see it for them
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francy-sketches · 2 years
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damn hotd kinda slapped ngl
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viiridiangreen · 6 months
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also i turned 26 today and it was mostly just like. A Thursday. Got to work from home tho if i had to come into the office on my birthday i would've.............. prolly not done anything drastic but i wouldn't have liked that at all lol
pros: we ordered some Special Cookies (if u haven't tried alfajores u r Missing Out), hung out w partner, & their family sent nice messages. finally dipped my toes into franchise mode in planet zoo (so not following a set Theme but starting my own park from scratch with a Likely Overambitious habitat for Spectacled Caimans with an underwater viewing gallery. it's gonna be rad if i can avoid running out of money hhhh. i'll post pics when i've added foliage / rockwork / the actual critters lol) & we're about to do this week's destiny story update thing rn.
cons: my family was A Bit Weird abt it esp my aunt on my mom's side like she typed a whole thing in whatsapp which started with "I think about you almost every day" and then she deleted it when i didn't look at it within a few hours haha.
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