#[ ene i didn't think this tl;dr would be this long ;A;

[binomech]

in which @medusaesque and I ponder the Kim skill tree (under the cut because it's long, as usual) ft. en dehors (a psyche skill from her latest comic)

medusaesque: i was really proud of en dehors.. human interaction is a complicated dance but if you listen to the music learn the chirography and practice your moves MAYBE you can reach out and dance

binomech: yes yes yes

binomech: ponders. god i didn't realize you meant the ballet meaning

binomech: i don't know if you care about what my brain thought en dehors was mentioning but i concocted a whole string of bullshit as the philosopher in me is wont to do

medusaesque: do tell 👀

binomech: so en dehors is a legal term in french as well as many other things but. it's the term that is used to separate criminal charges for military officials -- the punishment is different whether the crime was comitted in the line of duty or as a civilian (en dehors de l'armée). it's also a concept in contemporary queer theory in francophone circles that lines with the theory of marginality which tl;dr is an utopian proposal talking about whether or not it is possible to live a full life in the margins of society and when does a margin stop being a margin. marginal both as in a footnote in a book margin and as an oppressed group of people. en dehors is a way to describe emotional detachment. en dehors is synonym with en coulisses, is what happens in the backstage, the dirty unrewarding work that no one ever will see unless they look for it. an exogamous marriage -- an union that happens outside of the socially expected bounds of the group, is also called mariage en dehors. the marriage that isn't approved by the church is also a mariage en dehors. en dehors, paumé, a vagabond who can't find a place that will take him in.

binomech: anyway.

binomech: it literally did not occur to me to think about the classical dance thing i was like Lost In The Sauce

medusaesque: WOW i knew the queer theory thing its part of why i chose it for kim (and of why i even know a classical ballet term lmao) but i did Not know the legal term! thats fascinating

medusaesque: goddamn

medusaesque: you made my thing much cooler

medusaesque: i just thought of kim living in the margins and the way he might approach venturing out of them and reaching out- calculated and measured but passionate like dance

binomech: it's very GOOD

binomech: i'm like wow... this reading... is so flavorful!!!

binomech: my approach was so devoid of warmth and i like that... idk how do i put this

binomech: en dehors position in ballet is precarious and precise much like kim's demeanor towards his existing is precarious and precise but like you said it is rewarded with the potential of a group dance

binomech: his composure and poise being the only chance to be part of the in-group

binomech: and also of course the marginality of a queer racialized experience at large but specifically the exhilarating bravery of dipping your toes into the main text

medusaesque: yeah!! thats how he literally dances but also how he navigates any other social situation

medusaesque: i imagine every time he puts his hand on harrys back or shoulder its an en dehors check

medusaesque: not too light, not too tight, definitely not too gay

binomech: man every time i think about this i'm like fully cognizant of my biases because i am white and i know race is crucial to kim's embodiment and exitence but all i can do is washed out analyses based on secondhand recountings of friends and theorists. so i focus way too much on queerness and disability

binomech: like the disability in text is so fucking blatant to me but it's like 3 lines so it could be easily dismissed and i'm scared of getting fanon-brained about it

binomech: so when conceptualizing skills i'm like. am i being true to canon kim. what would canon kim do bracelet

medusaesque: nah it's defiantly there

medusaesque: the disability i mean

binomech: like... yes he has a 7/10 shooting score (unbelievable that this is High to people) and he can drive and he can do fucking crosswords but I just... i think a lot about my own experiences and about how people normally conceputalize the spectrum of blindness and i pick a comically large hammer and squash the world

medusaesque: well first of all its really meaningful to find that kind of connection in fiction even if you arent 100% accurate to the source material and secondly kim canonically has really bad eyesight and it affects his relationship to vulnerability and lack of agency

medusaesque: so id say ur good

medusaesque: like dealing with being thought of an a spy, with fetishization, with the whole model minority thing..

binomech: yeah!!!

binomech: anyway yeah disclaimer of the bias that permeates these takes

binomech: a lot of people with visual impairments (moderate, severe or total sight loss) share this experience of the internal and external existence of the body being severed

binomech: something that i have experienced a lot, for example, is people telling me my face is overly expressive. something that a friend of mine who is fully blind since birth gets told a lot, is how stony faced she is.

binomech: they both have the same source: i struggle enough to see facial expressions on other people, to match them with a topic or tone of voice, as she does as well obviously. for me that has resulted in making my face move in what i can sort of glimpse from the motions and shapes of other's faces, to my friend it has resulted in her having been told how to move her face into smiles and frowns and gestures that are a mask to her and that do not come naturally

binomech: it's an act for the benefit of others and it's calculated

binomech: it's a very jarring feeling, to become aware of just how big the space between how you exist in the world and how others see you exist in the world is

binomech: and i think this is true for kim for disability reasons and for asian guy in a predominantly white environment reasons

binomech: and the moment you understand this gap is very traumatic

binomech: i think about kim's expressions being described as unreadable, subtle, sometimes not entirely matching his tone and i think about his face being the mask of composure to harry

binomech: there's also the precision that permeates all of his being: the orderly environments, the tailored clothes, even the color choices of his belongings

binomech: clutter is a hazard for bvi people on a practical level. having control over your appearance is a way to increase your chances at respect. all the important things must stand out because you Cannot lose them.

binomech: a bright orange jacket, a blue car and notebook, halogen square reflections to remind you who is safe and who isn't, who is a pothole and who is a tree shade

binomech: also if it is indeed severe hyperopia that he has, it does get worse with age

binomech: i suspect it's something more on top of that; i am nearsighted and have astigmatism but my actual disability comes from glaucoma, not from those, which are what i wear glasses for

binomech: anyway, it's really disheartening in general to have a degenerative condition but it's even worse when you base your personal value on how much of an asset you can be to the police

binomech: when i was a teenager i would study the visual clarity text charts so that i would score higher and they wouldn't tell my parents that my eyesight was getting worse because then i might not be allowed to do things i liked

binomech: i imagine a straight up adult kim lying to keep his license and the immense frustration of realizing that your best is a 7/10 when handling a gun

binomech: and knowing it's all downhill and the issue was never the words on a paper slip, that it DOES have consequences on your life and sense of self

medusaesque: god that really got me in your fic. kim and the way he tries to hold on to things that are slipping away

medusaesque: to be capable and power through. return from the sea. fight another day

binomech: shoutouts to the crushing weight of wanting to be a pilot for a commune that no longer exists, with an airforce that no longer exists, that wouldn't even take you in because you're a seolite crip

medusaesque: glory to the ghosts of us (or who we wanted to be)

binomech: howling

binomech: but yeah i do think Clinging is a big character trait of his

binomech: clinging while refusing to admit that's the only thing keeping him from falling off

binomech: again i think kim is both fully aware of how he's one misstep from his life falling apart and to some extent knows that it's a structural issue, but if it's a structural issue then it means he can't fight it alone, and you can't fight with others when the only thing you can trust is yourself

binomech: so he's got this stupid ass cognitive dissonance that has him listening to speedfreaks fm in a police issued vehicle when he should not even be allowed to drive

binomech: he plays with risk because a part of him knows that it's not a game

medusaesque: but he would never let anyone take away from him or even touch

binomech: EXACTLY

medusaesque: the thrill of danger.. from a man that the first thing you learn about him is that he would hurl himself in death's way for you

medusaesque: who outlived everyone

medusaesque: it's a dark game

binomech: not to bring quotes from other places but: "you will die for a cause, but you won't fight for one?"

binomech: kim doesn't realize he's not a sprinter, this is a fucking marathon

binomech: he seeks the thrill and the danger because going out in a blaze of glory is easy, having to apologize for all the wrong you've done and the principles you've betrayed is Hard

binomech: it's humiliating

binomech: and he won't be taken for a fool

binomech: he has a mask that is both keeping others from seeing him and him seeing himself

binomech: if his body isn't him, then he isn't lowvis, he isn't seolite, his body is a tool for justice through the RCM

binomech: and it's fucking hard, he sometimes feels the full extent of his humanity and limited individual power

binomech: so he sublimates his hopes and needs for the city that he loves. he's not a moralist but he still hopes to be a forget-me-not and a piece of the sky

binomech: an indistinguishable part of a whole

medusaesque: to be a part of anything

medusaesque: an unquestionable, necessary part

binomech: if a piece falls from the sky the sky just crumbles

binomech: he's necessary even if no-one notices

binomech: he has to be. otherwise, what is the point?

medusaesque: its all would be for nothing

medusaesque: people are more valuable than machines, it's always darkest before the dawn, sunrise parabellum, after the pale the world again, a blue forget me not a piece of the sky...mantra after mantra of this will eventually be worst it. there's belonging and worth at the end of this road

binomech: anyway all this meta was CONTEXT for skill talk -- i think that kim's mask is not a dramatic one but a folding screen, a blind (haha) to protect himself and to isolate himself. i think the ability to Spot the Beacon (both visually and emotionally) would also be very important. the flawlessly crafted cog in the machine. en dehors, as established. something full of desire that could be fulfilled if you reached out 5 centimeters to the left. dogged perseverance in the face of loss. thrillseeking.

binomech: honest to god give kim o&m aids i beg of you. he would hate a guide dog but. a fucking pocket magnifier. a light cane even if it's just for checking or social visibility (he would Despise it). a fucking psychic beam that tells harry to tell him minutiae about the world. anything

binomech: i feel like that is also a skill that i cannot conceptualize succintly - the awareness and fear of the unknown-to-you

binomech: be it the pale be it all these troves of information everyone else gets just by existing that could just pass you by i feel like that is also a skill that i cannot conceptualize succintly - the awareness and fear of the unknown-to-you

medusaesque: working together with volta do mar maybe?

binomech: absolutely

binomech: i think that volta as canonically physique tracks with my impression of kimskills

binomech: which is that they are uhhh

binomech: god anytime i try to say anything about kim it just turns into a 5 levels deep rabbithole context

medusaesque: the jacket descriptions fucking kiiled me

medusaesque: 'distant eneny of himself' howling....

binomech: in the constructed language toki pona, which is a language that is meant to be able to express everything in the world in an extremely limited amount of terms, there is a core word: selo

binomech: i promise i'm going somewhere with this bear with me

binomech: (quoting lipamanka's semantic space dictionary)

selo describes the outer layer of an object. It doesn't matter what the object is. For example, skin can be selo, and bark can be selo. This can get extended into the metaphorical. What are outer layers for? Usually, they protect that which is inside. perhaps an attempt to ignore bigotry could be described as a selo. But in doing so, you're framing it as an outer layer of your mind. selo for "protect" has a different vibe when compared with awen's protect meaning. With awen, a protection is an act of maintaining, perhaps from afar with no risk to yourself, but with selo, protection always puts something at risk, be it the skin of an apple, the walls of a castle, or the case of a guitar. selo don't always have to contain anything important, even though they usually do. Balloons are usually empty (save for air) and they can still be selo. In fact, a vaccum chamber's walls could be selo, even though they literally have nothing inside of the (save for "dark energy" or whatever don't @ me I'm not a physicist). As a verb, selo can mean "to surround fully," or "to become the outer layer of (something)." Some people use this for hugging, which is very fun.

binomech: selo, then, becomes: a shell. a protective layer. a barrier. a surface level understanding. a cover.

binomech: volta do mar as a physique skill AND as an associated trait to the jacket

binomech: your traitorous race. your traitorous job. your traitorous parents. your traitorous senses. distant enemy of yourself: seolite, communist, cripple, faggot.

binomech: and you wear it as armor

binomech: those will take the hit

medusaesque: GOD. thats so...

medusaesque: yeah

binomech: everyone associates it with the pale because of the canon references to volta and the voltas being poems and other artforms that can... filter the pale, as it were, to protect the mind

binomech: to put a net between the unknown horrors and the known horrors, to make the incomprehensible palatable to the mind

binomech: to make the harm from the Other match the harm from the Self

medusaesque: the kind of compartmentalizing kim excels at

[fuck-customers]

Pls tell me someone else has been through something similar.

TL;DR: Paid for a strangers groceries. Got asked out by him through his friend. Denied coz Idk why he did that & uh... he was deff not femme presenting so not my preference (& I still feel bad about it lmao). 🥲 #rip

○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

I don't hate this customer, but I constantly wonder if anyone has had a shared experience like this so if you have, PLEASE leave it in the comments (or reblogs).

(*Shared experience as in... a stranger/customer asking you out for something you did for them while on the clock or something you showed them at work that's a work perk.)

When I was a cashier at the american grocery store "English en Español", I was in a low income area. I constantly had cis men hitting on me for no valid reason, as I'm not the socially accepted aesthetic for "attractive" (probably because it was a small town so there wasn't much selection & I live in cities so I dressed/acted differently than most? Idk. I'm a transman, pre-t & pre-surgery, but present as femme for safety reasons, espec in small towns). I often didn't notice until coworkers told me after they had left or until the man, himself, told me straight up. It was common enough that we had a signal bc apparently I suck at picking up on people hitting on me. NO ONE working that night signaled for this one, despite several of my coworkers seeing this.

So needless to say, I did NOT see this coming.

There was a guy with two girls checking out their groceries at my register. It was late at night, close to closing. When it came to the guys portion of the groceries, he split things up to afford everything. (I feel that lol.) His card declined on the last part. He was maybe $25ish(?) short (idr exact amount). He asked to take off a few things & I was like "Wait, wait." & jumped around & slid my own card & paid for his stuff. At that time (about a decade ago) my finances were mostly stable. I was doing what I could for anyone who needed it. It wasn't abnormal for me to pay for people whose groceries got declined by under $50 if I had it that month. I was stuck at a grocery store all day & people quite literally need food. It's the *least* I could do while financially stable, yknow? He wasn't someone I singled out... just someone else I managed to have the privilege of helping.

But this guy looked like he was both a) about to cry & b) incredibly embarrassed. He barely whispered thank you to me before grabbing everything & RUNNING out the door. His two friends thanked me profusely & followed him out *normally*. Lol.

I didn't have anyone else to check out coz it was almost 10pm at that point, so I was just vibing at my register. Maybe 5 whole minutes later (yes, THAT LONG) one of the girls the guy was with comes back in & runs up to my register.

I didn't say anything coz I was confused. Why is everyone running? Why does everyone have so much energy? Jeeze. 💀

She said, quickly & excitedly, "Remember the guy you just saw that you paid for his groceries?"

Me: "👁👄👁... yeah?"

Her: "Well, he wanted to know if you wanted to go out with him. Like, on a date."

Me, confused, not knowing what to say, stalling: "Uhhhhhhm."

In my mind, I'm thinking: 'Why would he want that? Because I paid for his groceries? Does he think I'm one of those dommes that gives money to their subs? Oh no. I'm a sub, not a dom! Maybe he just thinks I'm nice? Oh god, he's gonna find out I'm NOT nice if we date... but I really only like femme presenting people. How tf do I say that in a small town where I don't want that to get out? I don't know what's happening here, but-"

Me, without hesitation: "Sorry, but ...I like women?"

Her: "👁👄👁... Was that a question?"

Me: "...No?"

Her: "... 👁👄👁 ...Okay, I'll tell him. Thanks!"

Again, with the running. Running out the door. To the car. They looked about the same age as me. Early 20s. Like... where are they getting this ENERGY??? 😭

He NEVER came into the location I worked at again while I was there for 3 years lmao. The two girls did. Ik he lived in the area. This was before the time of grocery delivery. So uh... I feel awful lol.

I also feel awful because I never really say no to anyone in that context or break up with anyone. I always force *them* to say no or break up with me so that I don't have to do it. 😅 I'd never in a million years lead anyone on coz that's completely unfair, but I really just need the other person to do it & I couldn't in that situation so it still sits in the back of my mind like, "oh my god what have I done" kind of catastrophic thoughts spiraling from there. Meanwhile, he probably doesn't even remember I exist. 💀

So rip to me, I guess.

Please tell me someone else has had some kind of interaction where a stranger/customer has asked you out or tried to get with you based on something you did (or did for them) on the clock or a work perk you showed them/they saw. 😭 Pls make me feel less alone in this lmao.

Also make sure to give the follow up tea! Did you go out? Did it work? Are you married? ☕️ 🦊

When I was 19 I gave a lady a coupon for money off (I'm 50 I forget how much it was for.) and this lady tried to hook me up with her 13yo daughter. I dunno if that counts.

-Rodney

[bentosandbox]

hoshi headcannons GIMMIE [pwease im starving]

woah how did you know i had some (more) bubbling in my head recently after reading the mh collab (not that she appears in it :( but…yato does) also perfect timing since hoshi module Y is about to drop just dropped on EN

read it NOW!!!!

ok so . shes basically like an old salaryman to me just look at that bow (salute emoji) and with all the salarymen traits that come with that like terrible work life balance(well they are all office workers so. all have this but shes like, THE salaryman you know) nomikai addict (kind of real) and a super yes-man except..nobody dares to even make her do something she wouldn't do herself, and not out of fear(well maybe a little for some) but out of respect (probably saved every officer at least once), and being a senior (since she's been with the lgd since day 0) she could technically treat people like they're beneath her (true) but instead she goes super formal-mode the gapmoe(?) is so endearing its like . suddenly thought of the mc from vinland saga whos like ^_^ im so harmless i wont harm anyone (havent not caught up with it for very long though idk if it's still like that)

she likes to (Module X spoilers I guess) idk roleplay being a pushover??? in that story she tl;dr comes to the rescue of a colleague who is like 'ty oni-sis but you should just leave me here 🥹 and she's like (tanks like a champ getting her ID card cracked in the process module.jpg) and goes 'haha sorry that request is a bit too hard why not i uhh help you apply for a bonus instead' it was here i was like ok hoshichen (in that order) is dead to me she would never yaoitop chen !!!!!!!!!!!!!! basically could be left.jpg but is right.png most of the time

she's old… but how old?? I guess touhou type of old…? the other two are like kids to her at times, maybe sometimes she does an old man act to get them to stop quarrelling like sitting at the window and with a coffee and reading something and telling them 'ok im just going to sit here until you two sort it out ok take your time' (they instantly stop)

her and chen: i think i mentioned this somewhere before but chen = wuxia protag hoshi = her mentor (in some capacities since technically wei was her [absent] mentor) she has all the qualities you would want except like in standard mentor fashion, a little conservative (i really do like this…flaw? because to be content with how the LGD operates, it makes you wonder how things were like before…)

her and swire… i like to think sometimes swire brings That Day up and hoshi is just ^_^ i see! and then after chen is gone maybe swire has some difficulty cleaning up the mess and at times takes out the badge to have a 'what would mysterious officer x do' moment and one time hoshi catches her doing that and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh omg forgot what i wanted to write here

her and lin: man…………….they didn't seem that hot in ch7 but man the potential interactions of an ex-underworld lackey and current underworld heir where is my food hg where are the ingredients i will cook the food myself but i need the ingredients to start with that one interaction was not enough

(quick spoiler warning for monhun collab) basically only the el gatos and rathalos got isekaid so the village is all higashinese and not like a MH village so you get sprinkles of higashi lore

i bring monhun collab up because yato and noir used to be an assassins but they quit da life and yato mentions 'killing your own kind', talks about her last hit she flaked out on but that that another assassin simply killed the mother and daughter duo she was supposed to kill so i was like damn what if hoshiguma also…?? (they are all oni and we all know she's ex-yakuza) or what if… she was the one that had to do yato's job, the hoshi/yato yaoi would be UNREAL but i dont think HG has the guts

also she and yato are ace because uhhhhhh i said so my rhodes my rules no joke i had wanted to do a hoshiguma dating sim for this year's april fools (with a bunch of other ops too but she would be the 'main' route even though there's no 'good' end) but then uhhh time issue anyway don't forget to set the LGD trio's voices to cantonese

[jess-moloney-malarkey]

There is a picture that proves that Jess has been stalking Jamie since 2015, she was behind Jamie and Matilda at a concert in 2015 she was looking at Jamie strangely if it's not a coincidence that Jess has been dating Jamie since 2021.

Jess followed Matilda on Instagram and she liked her posts and when Jamie and Matilda broked up, Jess unfollowed her and she was probably following Ruby on Instagram when she was dating Jamie and when they broked up in 2020, Jess unfollowed Ruby the same way she unfollowed Matilda because she was obsessed with Jamie, she was stalking him by following Matilda and Ruby on Instagram and Jess wasn't interested in Matilda and Ruby otherwise she would have continued following them both after their breakup with Jamie.

I was thinking, when exactly did Jess move to Los Angeles before Jamie, at the same time as Jamie and Ruby in 2019 or when she started dating Jamie, because if Jess moved to L A when she knew Jamie was installed, is that for me it is stalker behavior.

First Jess stalked MGK because she was obsessed with him and MGK probably refused to date with her and weirdly she started stalking Jamie from 2015 by following him because he looks like MGK (in my opinion), what she didn't have with MGK, she had with Jamie, she took advantage of the fact that he broke up with Ruby and she started getting closer to him on Instagram in 2020.

I had nothing against Jess when she started dating Jamie en 2021 but for almost 2 years she has been drawing attention to herself at conventions using Jamie and and he doesn't realize she is manipulating him to become famous through his success.

Oof I’m so sorry for how long this reply is gonna be. I’ll put a read more. But hear me out… (tl;dr for most of it, the gist is that we simply don’t know a lot of things for sure. That’s my main point. Have your opinion of how things might have gone, whatever, but understand that that may be vastly different than the reality of it all because we weren’t there.)

I know what photo you mean, but proves stalking? I don’t know about that. A single photo of Jamie and Jess at the same event does not effectively prove she has been stalking him since then. Possible? Sure. But I wouldn’t call it solid proof of that, especially when they’ve both been in the world of fashion for at least a decade. All it only really proves definitively is that they were attending the same event in 2015.

And how do you know when these unfollowings took place? Do you know if they were really right after a breakup, or if they were months/years later? If Jess was a nobody before Jamie, none of us were probably aware of her to keep tabs on her likes and follows. We wouldn’t be able to know. Again, not saying it’s impossible she unfollowed directly after the respective breakups, but without timestamps, we don’t know for sure. You even said yourself that she “probably” followed Ruby, but we don’t know that.

I think the last few paragraphs of yours are much more a personal feeling on things. From an objective view, she apparently worked with MGK in some capacity. Somewhere along the way, the relationship (to whatever degree it was, we do not know for sure) ended. That’s the facts, that’s what is definitively out there. We also don’t know for sure how or when exactly Jamie and Jess became close enough to begin dating. Your opinion is yours to have of course, but objectively, there’s a broad range of scenarios that could have taken place because we realistically have no idea what actually did.

I also wouldn’t say she has been drawing attention to herself at conventions. Fans go up to her, fans approach her and ask for photos. She hangs around her partner who is working there because that’s her partner, it’s not weird. She doesn’t have to wait back at the hotel or avoid him, you know? Going to EVERY con is a lot but hey, we don’t know what conversations they have had about her attending them all.

And in my opinion, if she was using him to gain fame and success, she really ought to have aimed higher than Jamie. He’s popular yeah, but if she were REALLY after all that for herself, and was this narcissistic gold digger type, wouldn’t she hop around to whichever hot new thing there is in Hollywood, like someone who is in higher demand?

[riddlerosehearts]

🐍 oh my god i had no clue there was a way around the character limit, thanks tumblr for being inconsistent across platforms 💀

Nico was my fave when reading the original series as well! Though I did end up latching onto Leo more when HoO came out, I still always have a soft spot for Nico.

Funny you say that about Jamil, I just saw some super awful takes abt him recently (again) that just made me feel like people are reading a completely different story, though part of that can be blamed on how the EN translation changed some stuff that kind of completely change the context of his situation.. honestly, given what you wrote abt Annabeth I think Jamil would also fit in Athena cabin - he's smart, capable, cunning and a strategist, plus he already has the gray eyes. He'd likely be the head of the cabin too.

I agree! Lots of people have pointed out there's a lack of Leo & Nico interaction in canon despite their similarities and I think that's such a shame, while I don't ship it romantically I really wish there could've been a friendship between them. I wish there was more emphasis on platonic relationships in general in HoO, so many things could've been explored further but we didn't get to :(

Nico being allergic to cats despite liking them is actually so adorable, I'm totally accepting that headcanon now. He tries to hold Grim then starts sneezing uncontrollably.

Me too! I'm usually reluctant to share my thoughts in case anyone reads it and thinks "there's no way you actually think that/that's stupid", but I'm really glad I can share with you and chat about ideas because it's so nice hearing what someone else thinks. Along with that I have made PJO OCs that I have been faaar too shy about showing people, but I they're precious to me and maybe I will post them one day...

Leo just using latest shows as bg noise would fit so well and be so funny lol, he'll know a few things here and there about whatever's going on but be completely wrong about some things that die-hard fans get mad at and give him a long lecture about the series that he barely retains because he didn't expect it. And Leo having fire hair can be uh, just a terrible accident where he lit his own hair on fire, for my "i just want to see it one time" convenience.

Now for a fun question, how do you think Leo & Nico would wear the NRC uniforms or dorm uniforms? Like how Idia never wears the blazer, Jamil wears a hoodie etc - how would they prefer to dress?

tumblr is such an inconsistent, buggy mess it's ridiculous sometimes. recently i discovered that i had blocked someone whose url i recognized but who i didn't ever remember blocking and don't know why i would've, so i unblocked them immediately but i was just like?? how did that even happen?? could've been a mistake on my part but i also wouldn't be surprised if it was a glitch 😭

i latched on so hard to nico as a kid because i was an edgy emo kid who really related to him ADKJGHDK. so of course as an edgy emo bisexual teenager i started loving him even more when house of hades came out. but like i said before, leo is easily my favorite of all the new characters from HoO! i have some criticisms of HoO as a whole but i like leo so much that i used to want to be a hephaestus kid mainly so he'd be my brother (and before that, i wanted to be a hades kid for reasons that are probably pretty obvious LOL).

oof, yeah, i do play twst EN and... okay, i was going to go off on a whole tangent here about jamil and kalim and how the localization watered down their entire fascinatingly tragic dynamic but it got so long that i realized it could practically be its own post. so i removed it and expanded it into its own post. it's here if you'd like to read it, but tl;dr is i agree with you completely lol. jamil is one of the most misunderstood and mischaracterized boys in the fandom and i think the changes EN made definitely have something to do with that, which frustrates me immensely because outside of certain choices made with both scarabia and pomefiore i tend to really enjoy the localization. the way they translate idia's dialogue is comedic gold.

anyway, though, i was also thinking athena might make sense for him! and i know i previously said riddle could be head counselor of the athena cabin, but i can totally see it for jamil too. although, i wonder, how would it affect things if kalim was also present at CHB? would jamil still need to keep his head down, make sure not to outdo him at anything, and reject any sort of position of authority so kalim wouldn't look bad? would he give the head counselor position to someone else (not kalim, i don't think they'd be in the same cabin) if it was offered to him? which reminds me, another idea i had is that i think it could be interesting if jamil was the son of a minor god while kalim was the son of an olympian, possibly giving jamil even more reason to resent him. or it could even be the other way around (say kalim's parent is a minor god and jamil's is an olympian, so jamil is more powerful than kalim but has to act like he isn't) too.

personally i do think romantic leo/nico is cute and it's a ship that i have a lot of nostalgia for since i read a ton of fics for it way back in the day lol, but i'm not shipping them in this twst AU! i'm a multishipper who loves nico and will together too and i really just wish leo and nico had gotten to be friends in canon. i strongly agree with you that HoO should've focused more on platonic relationships, and i actually basically said all of this recently in a post here!

okay, it would actually be hilarious if nico was still allergic to grim despite grim's constant insistence that he isn't a cat. and nico being like, well, i'm allergic to cats and i don't think it's the ghosts that are making me sneeze, sooo. and now i'm also thinking about nico coming at grim like idia in his labwear groovy askjdghd.

i feel like in general i'm so bad at explaining my ideas and i get worried about not making any sense lol! but at some point in the last few years i just sort of started saying fuck it, if i have something that i really wanna post on my blog i'll go ahead and post it and if someone thinks it's stupid then they don't have to follow me. i bet your PJO OCs are great, and you shouldn't be afraid to share them!

HMMM oh man, i'm nowhere near as creative as i wish i was when it comes to fashion because i'm bad at visualizing how things go together lol. but my first thought is that nico canonically insists on wearing his worn out old aviator jacket everywhere up until it literally gets torn to shreds. and then in TOA he buys a black leather bomber jacket and starts wearing that everywhere instead. so i think he'd insist on wearing his bomber jacket over his school uniform like idia does with his hoodie! he'd wear a black shirt instead of a white one, like vil does, and i could see him wearing the vest but i don't think he'd bother with the tie, blazer, or gloves. he'd also wear black converse and maybe he could add some more of his Emo Kid flair by wearing a cool studded belt or attaching chains to his pants or something, i think that'd be fun.

for leo, i would love to hear if you have a different idea than what i say because i'm not as sure about how i think he dresses! but i get the vibe that his main consideration is comfort and how well he'll be able to work in something, like he doesn't necessarily dress badly but he's very casual and doesn't wanna put a ton of time or thought into his clothing. so i could see him maybe wearing the gloves and blazer, but not bothering to put on the vest or tie or button his shirt up at the top, and just grabbing a pair of work boots for shoes.

[ermuellert]

what are your honest opinions on julian draxler's career?

personally i thought he was genuinely going to be a big star because he was this young wonderkid at schalke who won the world cup as a 20 year old (he didn't do much though to be fair) but it never really turned out that way ... he's not done terribly per se, he is playing for psg, living that sweet life en france, and somehow still getting callups to the german national team but i am just kind of sad that he never reached the full potential that he had ... i thought he would be the captain of the "new" germany generation, one of the leaders, but now he barely gets to play ... i am kind of extra worked up about his case because he seems like a nice and sweet person as well ... anyways maybe i just have a bad track record of predicting career trajectories, all the youngsters i thought would succeed haven't (yet), at one point i believed that julian weigl and max meyer would also be world beaters and here we are ... i don't know what it is, probably a mix of injuries, bad luck, and maybe just not working hard enough ... long long sigh

anyways if you read all that you're an absolute superstar because i really went and wrote an essay oops ... i look forward to your live blogging tomorrow as it is always entertaining ... lots of love xxx

i hope u know that deep down.... like. Deep Down... i am always always always craving to talk about julian...... like trust me... i promise essays on monsieur draxler are always welcome here because i used to write that much about him and sometimes still think that much about him too...

objectively speaking, i think he is doing alright! pretty good by a lot of standards probably, for most of the reasons u listed. he’s getting paid obscene amounts (probably more than he deserves at this moment in time), has a seemingly great personal life, and as u said, still getting his national team callups. 

my personal thoughts, on the other hand, are... well....... not really of the same sentiment. i already know i’m gonna write up an even longer essay so let me just tuck the rest of this ramble under a cut for the sake of my followers lmao

honestly for me... thinking about julian is kind of depressing. if you feel worked up about him, just know that i relate. he seems very happy where he is in his life at the moment and so of course i’m happy for him too but compared to the potential it seemed he had... it’s just a bit sad. mostly because it isn’t as though he’s an excellent player hindered by injuries (e.g. reus) or anything really beyond his control - i think a lot of what’s so disappointing about his career trajectory is really just to do with him and him only.

yes, his failed transfer to juve back when he was at schalke wasn’t his fault but to move to wolfsburg? i know hindsight is 20/20 but i almost wish he’d just stayed at schalke. the drama he got into while he was at wolfsburg really did not do any good for his image, putting aside the fact that he was putting in average (even inconsistent) performances for the team. at schalke, maybe he could’ve had more time to develop within a team he grew up in and just use his time there to work and work hard. (there’s something i want to say about mentality here but i’ll bring that up later)

then, when his transfer to psg was announced, i felt like that was some beacon of hope although honestly, i think anything compared to wolfsburg could’ve looked that way to me at the time lmao keeping up with that club just for him (and partly andré schürrle) was fucking painful my god

at psg he was off to a decent start and things were starting to look up! wasn’t starting every single match but he was playing fairly well and made quick friends with his new teammates (u know who lol) etc. but then of course any sort of rhythm/momentum he gained was totally thrown off by mbappé’s and neymar’s arrivals which i think were both only around half a year after his transfer. 

and so basically since then, he’s been “competing” for a spot with ney, kylian, and di maría.

(ok reading that back i realize that whole recap of his career was not really necessary or at least. making it as lengthy as i did wasn’t but. i’m too lazy to go back and reword everything so bear with me lmao)

taking all that into account, i think yes, to some extent, he has some excuse for the stagnation of his career. he’s had his injuries and he’s been played out of position for large portions of time.

but i think what really frustrates me about him is that as a fan who’s loved him for years it’s really sad to see that what’s holding him back is not necessarily a lack of ability but just that he doesn’t have the sort of drive i wish he did. it’s been on display in his performances before - he can be lazy and invisible - but i think what’s worse is how that translates off the pitch. he’s just never really seemed to fight for a spot in the starting eleven. and if the rumors are true (as they do seem so) the parisian nightlife has not been doing him very good lmao

not only that though but i think he just doesn’t care as much about football as he does about ... image? money? i don’t know. i don’t know what the word i’m looking for is. i don’t think julian is a superficial sort of person and i’m not saying ambition is a bad thing at all, but when he couldn’t go from schalke to juventus (and that failed transfer was riding, presumably, a lot on his wonderboy status at schalke), he followed the money to wolfsburg. put in performances that understandably received criticism at wolfsburg, then very publicly made a whole thing out of wanting to leave and not being able to. then followed the money to psg where he just ... vibes on the bench. well, at least up until this season. but even then, if it weren’t for all the covid cases and red cards, i don’t know if he would be playing as much as he has. 

so tl;dr: i love julian a lot still and he’s still the same sweet dorky fuckboi-ish guy i’ve been a fan of since the start and i’m happy that he’s happy! the tragic irony is that what makes him happy - collecting checks while being a bench player - is also what depresses me quite a bit about him. he has his flashes of brilliance every once in a while where you can see that 17-year-old schalke wonderboy in him, so you know that hype from long ago wasn’t all a waste and that somewhere in there is a very talented, perhaps starworthy footballer. but he isn’t. not because he can’t but because he doesn’t really care to. and not in a dismissive sense i don’t think. i don’t think he thinks “ah who cares about being the best player in the world fuck that” but moreso in the sense of “ah i think i’m doing alright! that’s good enough for me.” and that sort of mentality is what places him (or at least, contributes to his position being) a tier below his peers who have proven themselves (e.g. kimmich, although that also brings up the whole “can that sort of fighter/die-on-the-pitch type mentality be taught or must it be inherent” kind of thing so let’s move on before i write an essay within this essay) at the end of the day i know not every footballer is in this sport simply for the sake of playing it, but from time to time thinking about him fills me with a lot of nostalgia and yes a tinge of disappointment because i can’t help but think of what could’ve been (i.e. what would’ve happened if he’d stayed at schalke? stayed there for good or stayed for a season or two more, developed even more hype, strengthened his abilities. had a successful transfer to a good, solid club and continued to hone his abilities, etc).

ok. now i’m done. i’m so sorry for putting u through all that and skimming this back i sound SO dramatic lmao but man i’ve been through like six-ish years of following his career so fuck it oh well

also if u wanna know how much i still care, know that after the “draxler to leeds united” rumors first dropped, i wrestled with my impulse control every single day for a week trying to stop myself from dming him on insta saying “i love you but get ur ass to leeds or i will kidnap u and get u there myself your football career is killing me but i love you and just want the best for u have a nice day xx”

[acahyeri-blog]

→ introductions ! ☆

➣  [ ‘ wipes off sweat after following the masterlist ] woo! that was a workout! with that out of the way, it’s time to finally give my proper greetings to the great muns behind the wonderful muses of academykrp!! this is kitty, and this is my first time venturing out of mf/panfandom rp, and i think my friends made the right decision to drag me here to get started (=´∇｀=) i’m not too good with intros like these, but please do like this post so i could slide in your ims (or slide into mine). 

to get us started, click here and here for hyeri’s profile and essay! i also put a tl;dr, some little plots, and wanted relationships under the cut! please do check it out! ฅ(＾・ω・＾ฅ)

[ TL;DR ] 

hyeri is a 95-line junior taking a double major in political science and public administration, all in the name of taking over the world in the near future! she’s very serious about this, and has a twenty-step life-plan to help her achieve it (and with her skills, maybe she really can!)

she’s the daughter of two cosmetic industry giants--her mother owns riverlilee--a world-famous make-up and skin care line (which she models for, sometimes!) while her father is an internationally acclaimed cosmetic surgeon, whose consultation rates go above six figure won prices.

her IQ is over two hundred, and is a member of mensa

even with this, her father doesn’t believe she could be a rightful heir to their industry (spoiler: he’s sexist) and sends her to marriage meetings almost every other week, much to her chagrin.

she topped the CSAT with a near perfect score. she made a speech during the university’s opening ceremony and implied that everybody was inferior to her (”you can work hard and study hard--a great thing!--but you will never be up to my level. but that’s okay! i promise to be a benevolent leader once i’m elected into office. you’ll be in good hands with a genius like me!) you can already guess how the people reacted.

she was offered slots in harvard, along many other known ivy league universities, but declined in favor of bidulgi (she has her reasons!)

she’s jeonghan’s beard fake girlfriend, and have been dating for a total of six years (and counting). she has also known mingyu, chungha ever since middle school, and is cousins with lee jihoon. 

she lives in a three-bedroom, loft-style hotel suite with seola

personality wise, she appears ditzy and self-absored (and she is), but it all changes once she starts talking about the constitution, debating theoretical concepts, or solving high-level mathematical problems in record time. think legally blonde, except she’s a brunette!

hyeri genuinely thinks she’s better than everybody else (there is some truth to that) and has a hard time making friends because of her condescending personality. still, she’s a good kid deep down; her superior intellect just left a few holes in her emotional and social development. 

despite this, she’s still a bad drunk, and becomes touchy, giggly, and prone to stripping to her designer lingerie once intoxicated.=

in summary, hyeri is an over-the-top, larger-than-life, bunny-ears supergenius with genuine plans for world domination, and is gearing up to be the most extra world overlord to ever walk this earth.

[ WANTED RELATIONSHIPS ] 

freshmen who she pays to do mundane errands, like sprinkling flower petals in her path or blowing wind into her hair as she walks to class. these freshmen are either infatuated with her, or just want some extra cash. it’s open to all courses and all genders!

every queen needs a secretary, and hyeri is no exception. this one is a lowerclassman who helps our future world overlord with her hectic schedule, and makes sure she has a cup of her favorite sweet potato latte (soymilk, please) every morning. preferably female, please!

there are very few people who can match her intellect, so when hyeri meets a muse who can keep up with her rapid fire brain, she couldn’t help but feel a little threatened. and now, hands on her waist and high-heeled feet apart, she has publicly declared your muse as her lifelong rival. both an honor and a burden, really. open to all courses and genders!

a benevolent future overlord like hyeri also makes it a point to assist underclassmen and steer them to the right path, so she picks a hoobae from her course to groom. this means access to her well-written notes, free study tips, and even shopping sessions (or drinking!) when she feels like it. political science majors only, all genders!

kids are cruel, and hyeri has been betrayed by a supposed bestfriend when she was five years old, hence her distrust for “plebes”. but lo, their paths cross once more in bidulgi. will it lead to much needed forgiveness, or will you have her heel stuck in your thigh? open to all majors, preferably a junior, and required to be a female. 

everyone wants the benefit of being friends with a rich kid like hyeri, who spends money on her close friends like it was nothing. but do you really like her? or are you just there to get a taste of her fame? 

you’ve known she’s haughty, you’ve known she’s not available (but really, you don’t believe it’s true love), and you’ve known she has the tendency to step on plebes like she was made for it. still, that doesn’t stop you from falling head over heels in infatuation with the future queen, and you’re doing everything to get her to look your way. but really, all it gives hyeri is some slight annoyance and a lot of amusement. are you up for the challenge of a persistent suitor? any major, preferably male. 

[ POSSIBLE PLOTS ] 

you’re sleepy af from pulling an all nighter and was walking aimlessly along the university roads when a speeding car almost ran you over. you almost wanted to ask the driver to try again, but hyeri looks beyond worried when she parks to check if you’re okay. “world overlords can’t have criminal records, so you have to come to the clinic with me”

you know bidulgi is filled with celebrities and high-ranking people, but you still weren’t expecting to see riverlilee’s spokesmodel lee hyeri in the same bathroom as you. what would you do?

as a part of a well-known family, you’ve been invited to a marriage meeting for the lee heiress. what you didn’t expect is that the beautiful girl in your talks with your parents is the condescending genius from university. would you stay to watch how this would go, and maybe lead to discover that the ditzy queen has more depth than she puts out? 

you were quietly walking along the streets of seoul when you spot hyeri hiding behind a standee and she gets the scare of her life when you ask what she’s doing. apparently, her dad set her up to another marriage meeting and the man turned out to smell worse than an onion patch. she then gets an idea to get you help her out of the sticky situation and you’re now swept on a day-long adventure in seoul, hiding from her many bodyguards until the clock strikes twelve (or maybe, beyond?)

get the resident genius as a tutor! 

one of her hobbies is destroying other budding lawyers in mock-court, and you’re picked to be a member of her team for this week’s round.

hyeri is a bad drunk, and is always in a tight situation if she’s not flanked by jeonghan or mingyu. there’s a lot of ways this night could go. 

all of these plots could be picked more than once, and i am absolutely up for brainstorming if nothing here fits!! i hope to have a lot of fun here with my dear extra baby! please take care of me and this baby queen!

xoxo

kitty

[shay-is-freezing-blog]

Thinking about my muse, "Z".

well, I've been trying to expand the idea of my muse, or character, as a part of some sort of AU. And, well- I got a pretty solid base down.

NOTE: The character that goes by the name "Z" will change quite a bit. Their personality might zig-zig at times, and so may their design for whatever I post. That is because this is a blossoming idea- I have literally been thinking about it for two days (no joke, I didn't sleep last night) and I'm pretty satisfied with the current results. I'll probably change it up again in the future tho, so...

Zemminao!Tale: (ZMATale for short I guess..)

YO BTW if I ever turn this into a comic this will totally have spoilers on it.

i don't have a very good grasp on the world yet, because I've been working on the main characters.

Essentially- this WAS a totally normal universe- that is, until the hacker "0M1" (Omi) came into the picture. 0M1 doesn't know where they came from, or how they got into ZMA. They do, however, hold a disturbing amount of knowledge on the universe, and many others. The story would start when "The Human" (who 0M1 refers to as file{M4iN) meets 0M1.

0M1 talks briefly with M4iN, and soon afterwards, loses control of their corrupted body. M4iN doesn't understand what happened, and continues as usual.

GENO ROUTE

next reset:

When M4iN meets flowey, something odd happens. Toriel doesn't save her- instead, right before M4iN dies from Flowey's "friendliness pellets", Flowey reverses his attack, panicked, and accidentally hits himself with a pellet. He passes out for no apparent reason, and a blurry figure appears behind him.

"He's lost his EMPATHY. Please don't be hard on him, {fM}." The figure picks up Flowey and carries him away. The fight ends and where Flowey had been, there is a patch of bright red leaves in a heart shape.

M4iN continues as normal

GENO ROUTE

next reset:

M4iN continues as normal until the Undyne fight. However, this was previously a GENO route- and during the Undyne the Undying Fight, M4iN just runs away. When M4iN finally loses Undyne, they look back. Undyne, of course, has collapsed in the heat. They wonder, for a second, if they should do something. They pour water on Undyne's head.

Another blurry figure appears behind them, speaking softly. They spin around and watch the short apparition.

"Please.." It whispers. "{i4}, have some COMPASSION..." It fades. There is a box of colorful band-aids on the floor. Continue run as normal.

NEUTRAL- spared monsters: Undyne, Mettaton, and all guard dogs after hotlands

next reset:

pacifist run.

during Toriel boss fight:'

A shadowy figure taller than papyrus glides around behind Toriel.

"Oh, {li}, have a little SYMPATHY. The woman's let several children die.. And she regrets it, terribly." The voice snickers. "Though you've hurt her before. Right?" After M4iN spares Toriel, they find that they are crying.

later, before next restart: A white mask clatters onto the floor. "{eN}, if I could, I'd be amused.. You can tell it's a game already, huh? What if you.. Shook it up a little, next time? Watching you being all nice gets boring. What about... Only killing the {boss} entities? Or maybe only the cannon fodder? You choose. I want to see if I feel something."

and that's basically how you meet the quadruple!

lol they so dumbly vaugue. But I'm not saying anything... Unless I get somebody telling me to elaborate.

TL;DR:

Hacker gets split into four parts- Compassion, Empathy, Sympathy, and Determination.

The Human meets all four parts during several resets, each talking to them.

The determination "shard" is similar to Flowey- No morals, or emotions.

lets get this clear: My headcanon Flowey is not missing EMOTIONS, he is missing the ability to attach emotions to others. AKA, Empathy, Sympathy, or Compassion. He can feel happy, satisfied, triumphant, sad, annoyed, angry- his positive emotions weren't taken away, and neither were his negative ones. He is just incapable of CARING.

Anyways.. Sorry for the long post! Bye!