#{ TED

[thefvrious]

@sleazeballtm said -> "Hidge," Ted says it lazily, turning his head from where he sits-- bottle of beer in hand and other lifting to brush through his dark locks, "Do you have any idea what it's like to be this attractive? Like, don't get me wrong, you're a good looking guy-- but you're not getting any younger. Neither am I, but I'm definitely still in my prime, ya know?"

Henry is pulled from his reverie — having been lost in memories of the good ole days — he turns his head to look curiously at Ted, nose crinkling just slightly. “You’ve got an ego on you, don’t you?” He asks, cocking a curious brow before a smile is pulling at his lips. For some reason, Ted’s antics are endearing. “And what does that make me? Decay and rot?”

[dorkustm]

@sleazeballtm : "it's okay to take it out on a first date, just to see how she likes the look."

whenever pete seeks advice, his much older-- like, basically forty-- brother is who he relies more often than not. keep in mind that he doesn't have many role models in his life, and it kinda makes sense. but it's a hit and a miss. and in this case, he thinks for a fraction of a second that he's missed something in their conversation. his eyebrows lift and a snort escapes him because there's one thing that pops into mind, but his brow quickly furrows because on second thought, that's gross, and that's probably not what ted's talking about. his mind is in the gutter, and pete's 'better' than that.

"... i'm sorry, it's okay to take what out on a first date?"

[slautertm]

👫

this is something that is SO important to me but out of everyone in the spankoffski family, steph is the most nervous to meet ted. regardless of if pete has just talked a lot about ted or explicitly has told her how much his big bro means to him, the pressure is ON and even after first meeting ted she continues to put it on herself to keep up the hopefully good impression. and will even as she spends more time at the spankoffski's has some minor worries about it for the rest of time, even as time passes.

regardless of the verse, steph always gives ted a bottle of something from her ( aka her dad's ) liquor cabinet both as part of holiday gifts as well as whenever she stays with ted and emma as just a thank you ( though post nerdy prudes bonus it's probably more expensive nice shit because oh does she have a lot of it and is trying not to let herself overindulge in drinking it even if she wants to so ted is given BOTTLES of expensive ass hard liquor ). when she finally moves out and can't do that she does in fact just get him time and time again different things she knows to be good chasers- tonic water. fucking grenadine. sodas. juice. whatever until she turns 21.

in verses in which she stays with ted and emma long term, for whatever reason, i do think steph opens up to ted a lot about what her own house was like and her family life ( which as we know is pretty much non-existent ) during the wildest times--- but there's always an attempt to course correct with a "and this is why i'm thanking you for letting me stay and would like to either pay rent or get groceries or something" and then a joke to deflect but she does outright say a lot of her shit to him. so i'm sorry now tedward.

the minute temma gets their Dog or has kids you know who is the FIRST PERSON to offer babysitting or dog sitting? it's steph. is she confident in her skills with Child? no. but she would love to even give emma and ted a break for a second so they can do fun like a date or something? absolutely. and she actually in a great aunt and babysitter. and i have said it once and will say it again, but seeing temma with their kid makes steph have a moment of oh wait. maybe i want to be a mom one day.

bonus number five because i am so late on this : ted is steph's go to person to call in most time. car broke down? call ted. in the hospital? call ted. and etc. yes. she does text pete and emma ( or call pete depending on if it's something she needs to explain so to not cause Anxiety ) but ted more often than not is her first go to call or reach out.

[witchw00d-a]

since brom had moved to hatchetfield, he had quickly found a little morning routine for himself. he'd wake up, make out with his wife ( go a little further, if she so chose to bless him ), shower, and before he'd head down to hatchetfield high school where he was teaching gym and coaching baseball, he'd stop downtown at beanie's. he liked sugary seasonal drinks, okay?

he watched as the guy in front of him delivered a line that had brom's eyebrows shooting up and gaze darting to the barista for her reaction in case he needed to step in. but despite the cutting remark she shot back at him, he couldn't help but notice the smirk she bit back when she moved to make his drink.

" ahh, see, " he chimed in with a light chuckle, leaning in and gently bumping @sleazeballtm's bicep with the back of his hand. " my wife still talks to me like this, but i somehow landed her three years ago. i saw her try not to grin, so i think there's a chance, dude. "

[ratkiing]

✨ 👉👈

send ✨ or ( ‘SPARKLE’ ) and i’ll tell you at least one thing i like most about you, your blog, your portrayal, or your muse. / @sleazeballtm / accepting !!

bre ... you are an absolute delight. your writing blows me away every single time. i love how passionate you are for every single muse you write. not only in your replies, but in your ooc/headcanon posts about your muses. you've put so much through and effort into every single character you write, and it shows in everything you do. also you are just so so funny !! it really is so fun chatting with you ooc, and reading your ooc posts on the dash. you have been so kind and lovely to me, and you always end up making me smile.

[thefvrious]

@sleazeballtm wanted henry hidgens

"I don't need you to understand, I just need you to help me." Henry says, looking at Ted with an almost pleading expression. It's too much, he knows, to expect Ted to just go with it, to roll up his sleeves and dig right in. That's just not who Spankoffski is, and Henry is prepared for the onslaught of questions and commentary he's about to receive. Or, at least he thinks he is. "Think you can manage that?"

[dorkustm]

@sleazeballtm , rip brother [ TEXT ] : the kid is mine [ TEXT ] : she told me an hour ago { SEVERAL MINUTES LATER } [ TEXT ] : oh shit [ TEXT ] : i didn't realize i was texting you that was meant for my buddy bill [ TEXT ] : let's just pretend i didn't say a fucking thing

[ text : ted ] OH MY GOD? [ text : ted ] TED?? [ text : ted ] WHO DID YOU KNOCK UP??

[slautertm]

@sleazeballtm : [ text ] : hey can we talk? [ text ] : i need you to break up with pete. no questions asked. [ text ] : thanks in advanced

[ text : tedodore ] : uhhhhhhh [ text : tedodore ] : no? [ text : tedodore ] : i mean yeah we can talk but like no questions asked when you ask me to break up with my longest and happiest relationship? not gonna happen. [ text : tedodore ] U N S E N T : did i do something wrong? [ text : tedodore ] : did he say something to you about wanting to break up or ????????

[no1psychic]

sometimes my mouth likes to move faster than my brain. i just kind of talk when i think of the words before really processing what's coming out of my mouth. i think that this is one of those times, because @sleazeballtm is telling me "that's not what i'm going for" and it actually makes me pause for a few seconds. my head tilts to the side, eyes narrowing as i focus on ted's face.

"wait ... really?" and the question's genuine, hand raising so my index finger can tap on my chin. "you could've fooled me. you've got the porn 'stache and the general vibe of 'hey everyone i'm really funny but deep down i'm tortured by demons'." i'm not aware of how rude that could come across. part of the reason why i'm saying it is because i'm kind of the same. "what are you going for then? wholesome businessman? because i think you kinda missed the mark."

[clickedbait]

this blog is going to becoming super low activity for a little bit. i'll be in and out to do this or that, but right now? i need to limit myself and just do what makes me happy. for the time being you can find me on the following blogs:

@likezoink - shaggy r.ogers solo blog (high activity) @sleazeballtm - ted sp.ankoffski solo blog (high activity) @hatchetswung - hatchet.field multi muse (low - med activity) @groovyufos - original and canon plucked characters based in a stand alone universe. (low - med activity)

[hatchetsfield-arch]

me reading through ted x emma threads before bed:

@sleazeballtm @beaniestm

[dorkustm]

@sleazeballtm : "this was the ONE thing i told you not to do."

well, actually... the one thing that he'd been told not to do had been implied. not explicitly stated. 'suck up to the alpha, little bro!' pete hadn't appreciated the piece of advice at the time, but then again, he'd been the one that stood up to his bully and ended up with a black eye because of it. so, maybe he should've sucked up to jagerman after all. he didn't want to hear it, though. an irritated huff leaves him as he pushes past his older brother, walking into the kitchen so that he can retrieve an ice pack and try to reduce the swelling as much as possible before he has to go to school the next day. fuck him.

"please, ted, tell me how much of an idiot i am. kick me while i'm down. i haven't had enough of that today."

[slautertm]

"You can't predict what's going to happen," @sleazeballtm ,Ted's voice is numb, low and deadpanned, "The first few times are going to be awful, you aren't going to remember anything. You're going to wake up in places you don't recognize and in a state that may scare you, but it gets easier. The changing... the becoming it." He licks his lips and lets out a shaky breath, "I can't help you with those first few times... just, stay away from populated places and don't... don't go anywhere on a full moon night that isn't the woods."

well this is certainly the very last thing she expected to come out of meeting pete's family.

so much of steph wants to backtrack, deny, what she knows is obvious to the both of them but she also knows that there's no way in fuck she'd be able to swing that, not what it's so obvious to the both of them what the other is. the only other person who she had had something of a conversation with about this was her dad, her dad that knew she was going to become something but in his fear let her to the house as he made home in a hotel out of town till she 'figured it out on her own'. she didn't know where to start and now, she's finally getting answers and advice, someone understands but something in her recoils from it, and part of her thinks she knows why.

there’s a part of her that still isn’t quite sure why she’s letting herself get close to anyone. there’s part of her that is terrified that her selfishness in actively continuing to get closer to pete to maybe being something after realizing how she had no one would end in her hurting pete. that fear grows as she listens to ted now. there’s no hiding it on her face either, eyes widening and hand fidgeting with the tear in her jeans, all the while trying to avoid eye contact with ted.

adding to the ever growing pit in her stomach, even before this, one of steph’s biggest fears had been a lack of control. even when she got beyond wasted, she still managed to maintain something of a clear mind. she wants to be cocky and challenge him, say there’s no way in fuck she will be like that, but his certainty scares her into silence for a moment longer.

“ what can help me? there’s gotta be something, right? ” her eyes raise, trying keep calm, collected, but those eyes betray her—- she’s scared. it shows. “ how can i make sure i stay in the woods? won’t i run out? what if i- “ hurt someone- she doesn’t breathe that it into existence. it’s written on her face, though.

“ does it hurt? ” she already thinks she knows the answer, but she's trying not to appear afraid, weak, so she's trying to ask questions for the hell of it. desperate as hell and hating it more than anything.

[bakshiis]

i literally jack off after every single therapy session.

i'm used to unhinged bullshit coming from ted's mouth at this point. for some reason he had decided to latch onto me as a conversation buddy when he had started working at mq regardless of how many times i have informed him that i'm not looking to make friends at work. apparently boundaries are a concept that escapes the coder, which is why i find him in my office trying to make idle conversation. i was thankful that david was in meetings all day, leaving me with an office to myself. maybe the universe was punishing me for getting my hopes up.

"god, ted." i say with a groan, snatching one of the stress balls of my desk. i toss it in the air a few times, keeping my focus on anything but him. "you realize if i told carol what you were talking to me about right now, you'd get written up." my eyes finally meet his, and i raise my brow. "you might get off on talking about feelings but i do not. in fact, i'm not interested in this conversation at all! so you can leave. now."

@sleazeballtm

[badstepsmoving]

i am in the prime of my life. @ mac

my brow raises skeptically at the others statement. i sigh, shaking my head from side to side before taking a long sip of my beer. "dude, there's no way you're in the prime of your life." my nose scrunches up a bit as i speak, moving to grab another beer and slide it across the bar top to ted. "hate to break it to ya bro, but your prime had to have been like ten years ago." i pause, eyes running up and down the others frame. "you're like way too old to be in your prime. now, take me for example." my arms raise and i flex my biceps, showing off all the mass i've cultivated over the last few years. and yeah, i'm pretty sure i'm older than ted but look at me! this is the body of a man who's in his prime. "see? look how badass i am. i'm afraid that ..." my hand gestures towards him, and i let out a sigh. "... you just don't have that vibe about you, man. if anything you're like washed up or somethin'."

@sleazeballtm

[salvatoraes-moved]

spell out your url using characters you love from any media. then, tag as many people as there are letters in your url (or however many you'd like!) inspired by the song titles dashboard game.

steve harrington , stranger things

ambrose spellman, chilling adventures of sabrina

lottie matthews, yellowjackets

veronica lodge, archie comics / riverdale

allison argent, teen wolf

ted mosby, how i met your mother

obi - wan kenobi, star wars

rachel green, friends

amy march, little women

emily, the corpse bride

stiles stilinski, teen wolf

tagged : @wiredsmile <3 tagging : @forbaes , @klaeus , @prayertorn , @neptunc , @gunsmiths , @jeditrash , @enremoto , @neverafters , @bibliphale , @viikingwitch , @asryr , @murkyhazed , @beaniestm , @sleazeballtm , @ripjulie & you !