#{we need an invention}

[fumifooms]

Firefly Wedding is so…

It’s so

It’s them. It’s "It’s just a firefly, they’re meant to die soon. Why should I care about the sick, or the poor?"

It’s "I was purposely trying to scare you and push you away to see how far you were willing to go with your act, how desperate you were to play with my feelings as if I was a fool, but it didn’t work."

It’s "I know you’re just using me but now I care. Please keep using me. I need you to need me."

It’s choosing to give her her freedom anyways. Because your love is no longer all about you, no longer selfish. Because this love isn’t just a shallow balm to soothe your complexes anymore.

It’s being betrayed, finally facing the lies and no longer pretending you both don’t know that this is a farce, but desperately wanting to keep it going anyways. It’s "I should hate you now. Why don’t I? Hey, tell me we’ll go through with the plan, tell me you’ll marry me after all. Otherwise, why am I still here? Why don’t I want to leave? You act like you don’t need me but I still need you."

Like that’s so revolutionary for a yandere story. The self-delusion is strong, denial that things have changed despite it being impossible to truly believe, BUT HE STAYS. It’s no longer selfish 😭😭

"I don’t care about you anymore, I won’t help you. Get yourself killed for all I care." <- Jumps to her rescue 3 milliseconds later when she almost falls down a ladder/roof. It happens twice. The ‘lying and trying to emotionally distance yourself from something to protect yourself and not get hurt’ defense mechanism is blatant and it’s failing really bad.

It’s "My sense of duty and goals to have accomplished something useful in my short life are making me do this, but I do want you to stay with me." The yandere stuff here gets turned on its head because what he says is empty where it matters and meaningful where it matters. It’s knowing that if Satoko asks him not to kill anyone he won’t, but knowing that he won’t give up on her no matter what, even if she’s unattainable, even if she’s sickly, even if she pushes him away like just before. It’s so thinly veiled for "I’m determined to see my goal through, but that’s not what I want. If you just so happen to take me away and I don’t try to run away hard enough then we can elope and be free. I want to have an excuse to leave with you. Please give up on marrying me. Please don’t. I want that, but I can’t."

It’s "If I didn’t burn brightly in my short firefly life, then what was the point?"

Except that burning brightly doesn’t have to mean making big achievements, or being useful to your family.

It can be living happily, living for the ones you love, fighting for them. It can be worth to risk it for things that actually matter to you.

It’s giving your heart to someone, figuratively and literally. To lend it to them even if it might get used or battered, for as long as it beats to use your body to protect them, even if you have to sacrifice yourself. A love that burns bright into a bonfire before they both turn to ashes. Unwise but wholehearted.

It’s despite even that, needing grandiose gestures to be able to trust that this is real. It’s needing external cues that prove it to feel safe in their love existing, other people to confirm that he’s not crazy, that this is happening and this is how they both feel. Their love has been fake, both being a warped love and being a lie, only being out of necessity or because the other was the only one willing to offer it to them, offering comfort, safety, support and care. And showing that they care is the most loving of all. It’s despite everything falling back into old habits that "Oh if she was miserably worried for me then that means she’s not indifferent to me! That’s good!" And then once again being taken aback by her, by her earnestness and by her will. Because oh, no, this goes deeper than that. She cares. It’s love.

It’s opening your heart up to love, and both being punished and rewarded for it.

But most of all it’s

And it being the most loving thing he’d ever heard

Firefly Wedding is so…

And yet it’s also

The complicated and hurtful nature of love and the joy and light it brings are two sides of the same coin, because that’s what inevitably happens when you care about something. But caring about a firefly isn’t a waste even however short lived it is, or how hard the loss will inevitably hit you. Isn’t their light just such a wonder to witness?

[brother-emperors]

The great general remained, and then saw a wonderful vision clearly shown him by the very God of the universe himself. In it he seemed to see the divine Meletius, chief of the church of the Antiochenes, investing him with an imperial robe, and covering his head with an imperial crown. The morning after the night in which he had seen the vision he told it to one of his intimate friends, who pointed out that the dream was plain and had nothing obscure or ambiguous about it.

Theodoret Ecclesiastical History 5.6

wahoo! Theodosius! so a repeating phrase in the gospel of Luke is 'do not be afraid,' but specifically: I'm most immediately referencing the annunciation of the shepherds (Luke 2:10) because I used this illustration for the last panel since it. sort of. connects to Valens, Theodosius' predecessor, who went from commoner to king at the will of his older brother. HOWEVER. because of that transformation. I cannot escape the 'do not be afraid' just a chapter before (Luke 1:30) that Gabriel gives to Mary because ascension to the imperial throne is an ugly, violent, and violating transformation. and. well.

Gabriel’s Entrance and Biblical Violence in Luke’s Annunciation Narrative, Michael Pope

also in general. prophetic dreams and visions. horrifying. it never goes well for anyone.

⭐ places I’m at! bsky / pixiv / pillowfort /cohost / cara.app / tip jar!

[being-of-rain]

Something that really gives Doctor Who some cognitive dissonance is that it champions science, but it also, of course, loves to make sci-fi stories out of ideas in popular culture. Like conspiracy theories, cryptids, all the stuff you'd see on the X-Files. Lots of stuff that in our world goes against science, and is even dangerous or bigoted.

So the Doctor will be like "science leads," but also all of human history has been masterminded by extraterrestrials, psychic powers are real, magic is real, there's a species of lizard men who rode dinosaurs and now sleep beneath the earth, the loch ness monster is from outer space, every tenth planet ever invented is out there somewhere, aliens built the pyramids and Atlanteans built the sphinx.

[cozylittleartblog]

trying to figure out better watermarks is a nightmare actually. what am i, a stock photo website ?????

[strawberri-draws]

Doodles from This is how you lose the time war (read it for class and it was very good)

[electricpurrs]

if i could have one wish to make something from homestuck real i would 100% choose the sendificator. are you kidding if i had a little microwave sized device that can just automatically send things put in it from where i am to my friends houses i would abuse of that thing so much. sending all my mutuals a bit of my dinner

[dollypopup]

"Colin should have grovelled more!" "Penelope folded too easily"

I think statements like this typically come from people who like Penelope. . .but don't really understand her. And don't really understand just why she cares for Colin, and just why him groveling would not in any way bring her peace.

Penelope and Colin are kindred spirits in their loneliness, in season 3 more than any others. Penelope had lost her friendship with Eloise, and Colin didn't really have a close friend circle to begin with. Except with Pen. Pen was the person he could put the mask down for, could open up to, (in particular with their 'dreams' discussion) and that's why he couldn't even entertain the idea of giving up talking to her in Season 2. She is a vital part of his life, and holds so much significance and importance to him.

I imagine that's what made their silence over his travels especially painful for him. They spent such a long time talking after Season 1, and he even informs her that her letters were so encouraging, that it helped him heal something inside of himself. That if she could see him in a gentle way. . .so could he. (And he repays this, because he is honest to god out here acting and looking at her like she hung the moon in the sky). But without her presence in his life, he spiraled. Didn't feel confident in being who he is, and thus put on his persona more firmly. We know this because he wrote in his journal that "I want to be less needy, less insecure, while still maintaining the core of my vulnerability that makes me who I am". That he misses his family, that he misses home.

And we know, from the books, that Home? Home is Penelope. Penelope is his North Star, is his guiding force, and who I argue he feels he needs. In his very first scene, he looks toward her house, tries to find her in the window. When he does not, he returns to his family. In the outdoor gathering, he looks for her and finds her, eager to talk. He states aloud that he misses her, and I imagine he wrote it, too. Not hearing back from her over the course of his travels was surely something that hurt him, but he doesn't hold any ill will toward her for it, only wants to reconnect again. In fact, the one and only time he brings up how he misses her and that she didn't respond, she makes very clear the reason why: she heard what he said and it hurt her. And he's ashamed of it.

Colin hears her call him cruel, and instead of ruffling his feathers about it, instead of getting upset, instead of having a chip on his shoulder as I feel so many men would about it. . .he understands why she does so.

Penelope is a woman who has been largely treated poorly in her society. She feels unheard, she feels undesired, and in her circumstances, and I can't help but ask myself. . .has anyone ever truly apologized to Penelope for hurting her, before? Her mother? Her sisters? Eloise, likely, but. . .anyone else? And the way Colin did? Because of all the characters in the show, Colin? Colin knows how to apologize. He has a lot of practice in it. And very importantly: Colin, a man of privilege in his society, apologizes. . .predominately to women. To Marina, to his mother, and multiple times to Penelope.

Ultimately, Penelope wants to be heard, Penelope wants to be understood, Penelope wants to feel desired.

And Colin checks every single one of those boxes. He informs he is not who he was before, and then he proves it to her. He hears that he hurt her, and he comments on it directly. An entire night apart, and he comes back to her 'Because I embarrass you' with 'I am most certainly not ashamed of you', replies to her 'I am a laughingstock' with 'you are clever, and warm, and I am proud to call you my good friend'. He hears her proclaim her own insecurities, and empathizes so deeply with her. He listens. He understands. He makes clear that he cares for her, and that she *is* desired. 'You lift my spirits' 'I seek you out at every social assembly'. That she helps him see the world in ways he loves, that he sees HER and how much she has cared for HIM, that she makes him feel appreciated, that he appreciates her, in turn.

And then? Then? He shows her. He tells her, and he shows her. His actions all throughout Season 3 reinforce this apology. He continues looking for her in every corner of every ballroom, he continues complimenting her, he laughs at her jokes and respects her boundaries, he is ever so gentle with her, he listens to her with an attentiveness that no one else has ever given her. To Lady Whistledown? Sure. But to Penelope? Who else in the entirety of that ton has listened to Penelope the way Colin has?

Absolutely no one.

Penelope Featherington ghosts Colin Bridgerton for months with no explanation, and Colin comes back wanting to reach out to her, and she finally tells him why.

And he apologizes. Because he listens. Really, truly listens. And really truly cares.

I need you to understand how rare that is, even nowadays, but especially back then. That Colin is the kind of man who can put his hurt to the side and realize he made a mistake, that he said something callous, and he adores her, and he can't lose her, and he has to see her and make it right.

Because that's why Penelope fell for Colin. Not because he's beautiful, not for his charm, not for his family. But for his heart. Because he shows her kindness in a world that so often disregards her. Because he seeks her out and tries to understand her, truly hears what she has to say and compliments her, says he's sorry and looks at things from her perspective.

Because he saw her when she was invisible.

Penelope Featherington, who grew up in a house that made cruel jabs at her, has Colin Bridgerton come to her and say he regrets what he said, and that he was wrong, and that he understands why she's mad at him. Penelope Featherington who has so rarely had much of anyone tell her that they're sorry for what they said about her, sits before Colin Bridgerton as he professes how much she means to him. That he cannot even spend a full day away from her knowing they're on bad terms with each other without making it right. That he sees how she is hurting and he has to in any way he can amend it. She is lonely, with no one really in her corner at the start of season 3, and she feels like she lost it all, and Colin comes to her and says 'no, I'm here and I appreciate you and you are special to me, please let me in and let me prove it'. Is it any wonder why after she shakes his hand, she stands in the sun, and she feels the warmth of it, she can smile? That she can breathe, again? That she can be truly content for the first time in the season?

Because Penelope Featherington does not want Colin to beg. She knows him. She knows the tender, full heart he hides behind the new cavalier persona. She knows the soft underbelly of Colin Bridgerton.

He never had to grovel. All he had to do was love her. Assuredly. Fervently. Loudly. Unapologetically.

And he does.

[partangel]

me 🤝 symbolically adopting the foster teens who participate in my study by coming just to chat with them outside foster home

[that-binchh]

i don’t care if this is unrealistic but one of lestats songs needs to open with a voicemail from louis. like imagine if a track starting with “i’m gonna take this hand here and wrap it around that SCRANWY neck of yours, just like you did our daughter. and i ain’t gonna stop till your eyes POP. and i’m gonna find a big ole BUTCHER KNIFE and chop your head off. then i’m gonna walk that head all the way to audubon park and imma feed it to the FUCKING lions and i’m gonna LAUGHHH *que psychotic cackling*” and then it transitions to the most athetically yearning, ‘you are the loml & i need you back rn ’ song on the album

[shinesurge]

can anybody hear me for the love of god

[foursaints]

Can we please hear your take on rosier twincest if youre into that i would inhale everything u write abt them

unfortunately i fundamentally don't see anything like that in the cards for the rosiers :(

to me, twincest is most thematically interesting when there's a push-pull between a pair's individual identities & their overriding Sameness (a great text for this is "Gothic Incest: Gender, Sexuality and Transgression" by Jenny Diplacidi (x) ) but the rosier twins' sameness is too complete for that conflict to exist. it wouldn't make sense because there is no tension; they are content to think of themselves as one person. you can't pine for yourself.

also like. i hesitate to make the rosiers overly transgressive. their codependence isn't exactly "normal", but their siblinghood is one of the most palatable things about them... it makes them easier to understand, which makes them easier for others to accept. their sibling bond is one of the few purely Good things in their lives, and i see it as redemptive for both of them..

essentially they are normal 100% of the time but the one person insane enough to get a tiny bit weird about it is bcj (💀). he met pandora, had the earth-shattering realization that There's Two Of Them, and then said absolutely nothing but a certain look came onto his face that caused reg to immediately go "YOU'RE FUCKING DISGUSTING" in the great hall.

[fumifooms]

"Toshiro’s love for Falin is fake and impure! He only started liking her after something about her intrigued him and hooked him in, and only then started wanting to know her better and finding out he loved everything else about her too!" Buddy I have something to tell you that you won’t like about how falling in love typically goes…

[crescentfool]

happy valentine’s day! 💛💙

[asparklethatisblue]

last week I saw a bat fluttering around my neighbourhood, which is amazing cause my vision sucks and I have astigmatism which makes it especially hard to see things near light sources (i see lights super blurry so obviously small black objects in the dark near a light source are harder to see)

and yesterday I was walking to the store, determined to try and spot a bat where I’d seen one before. And!!! One flew right past me super fast quite a bit away! Also I did see TWO bats flying around together where I’d seen the very first one a bit ago! They were so fast I could barely see them, but it was definitely two, and maybe they were doing some sort of courtship behaviour? I don’t know that much about it, but it’s definitely mating season. So I was stood in the most unlit part of a pathway, trying not to cry cause I was so happy. I wish I had a recorder to hear their songs, because males do sing to woo their mates, but the cheapest recorder i’ve seen is 200£ or so. I’m 90% sure it’s pipistrelles of some kind, because they fly extremely fast and acrobatic, and are really common in the UK. Just based on speed and location that’s the most likely species, but there’s more than one kind of pipistrelle. It’s cool though, because it’s one thing to know on paper what sort of environment bats enjoy, and what it looks like in real life. The bats I expected to see are in the most tree dense part of this entire area, the one that flew by me was more or less out in the open by a very well lit street! They don’t have areal predators at night, and it was past sundown, so maybe it is fine? I did read that very bright streetlights disturb then. But then again in America there’s bats that straight up live in the middle of a big city!

anyway. I think whatever caused the mental breakdown the other day is quieting down and I’m just happy there’s bats here! I doubt my landlord would let me put up a bat box, but that’s ok, I know there’s a few around here and even though I can’t volunteer to help with bats in general (i need a car, the region doesn’t have reliable enough public transport) I can still see them!!

[miodiodavinci]

im being so so brave but also i am gripping you by the shoulders and leaning in and letting you know i am so tired of being brave

[revvethasmythh]

it's been weeks and i'm still so compelled by the background storyline of hawke going to weisshaupt after here lies the abyss. like. it makes no damn sense. maybe if hawke has a living sibling who is a grey warden, you can twist the logic of it, but i did not have that and also hawke said she wanted to make sure corypheus died and neither staying in the fade NOR going to weisshaupt really accomplishes this goal. like there is NO reason for hawke to be up at weisshaupt, this is not in her lane, this is not her business, her skin is NOT clear, her crops are NOT watered. the wardens are not the responsibility of your Just Some Guy from Kirkwall who has potentially zero connections to the wardens at all except for that one time they super causally tried to use her as a blood sacrifice (maybe she and the first warden can laugh about it some day, but somehow i doubt it!).

BUT. but. the mental imagine of hawke going there and then her sibling (if alive) and her love interest ALSO going there, just to meet up with her, makes it so bonkers funny i don't even care if it doesn't make sense. wtf do you mean hawke family reunion relationship drama in the austere home of the wardens where they all show up and then the entire leadership of the wardens suddenly implodes as civil war breaks out and then their asses get STUCK there. wtf do you mean hawke inadvertently sticks her ass in the middle of yet another civil war while simultaneously having to patch things up with her LI and deal with a sibling dynamic at the same time. hawke can't catch a fucking break istg. it's just her, her sibling, and her LI as their own little three person party while some truly WILD shit goes down and the epilogues are all ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ about what happens other than like two lines that put the most insane images into my head. there's a sped-up video of this going down in my mind with the benny hill theme playing in the background. why does varric talk like hawke is still at weisshaupt during trespasser, which takes place two entire years after hawke was meant to go there to give a basic report and then dip. how is this THE most hawke thing to ever happen and we're just. told nothing more about it except that varric got One™️ message from her via an entire smuggling syndicate that essentially says "damn, shits crazy here" and that he assumes hawke will walk away from the building while it's exploding sometime in the near future because apparently the conflict there is not yet resolved. again, this is TWO YEARS LATER. like trespasser is fun and all but truly can we revisit wtf this was all about because WHAT