#(oh yeah! lyrics are from beings by madeon)

[smile-files]

you have your way of looking at it. with the egg. and it's a great analogy!

thanks.

for me, though, i don't see an egg. i see... a chrysalis.

oh?

yeah... y'know, i wonder if caterpillars know how beautiful they'll become. and i wonder if that'd make metamorphosis any less scary.

hm.

well, at least for me, i know how beautiful i'll become. or... at least i'm told. everybody i've met has told me that i'll go on to live an incredibly happy, fulfilling, successful life. a beautiful life.

there's a reason for that, y'know!

well, golly! but that's not important. the point is that i'm a caterpillar on the verge of metamorphosis and everyone around me is telling me how beautiful i'm gonna be.

isn't that a good thing?

yeah, kinda. it's also really scary!

how?

well... i've done well so far in life. i've been relatively happy and fulfilled and successful. my life has been pretty beautiful so far.

mhm.

but y'know... i'm a four-leaf clover. how do i know that wasn't just... a fluke? a big lucky break? how do i know that once i exit that chrysalis i'll actually be as beautiful as everyone thinks i'll be?

hm...

i can't keep banking on that forever. and now, like everyone our age, i have to start making that chrysalis. i guess i'm just worried that my lucky streak will end and my life will go down the drain. no more beautiful butterfly.

...

what makes you think it's all luck?

well, i... well, you know it has some factor in this.

well, sure. but you've had control over your life too. and so have other people. you shouldn't call yourself "lucky" that i decided to be your friend - it was my decision based on my own thoughts and emotions. and the way you are, how nice you are to be around - that's based on your own thoughts and emotions.

i guess...

...

listen. i'm not going to say that every success you've had is one you've built from scratch. everyone starts with something - heck, you started with a lot! but that alone will never get you the whole way there. to like... genuine, meaningful success.

what about all those super rich people who're only rich because of their super rich parents? they started with a lot and they got the whole way there with just that.

yeah, they're successful, but you can't seriously tell me that their success is meaningful.

i suppose not.

you can't make friends with luck. even if literally every other good thing you've done is because of dumb luck... the fact that so many people love you and love to hang out with you is proof that you're a genuinely good person.

...

hey, i never said i wasn't a genuinely good person.

well it comes with the territory. i should know... and y'know, it is really hard to admit to yourself that you are a good person who deserves all of the success they have. but it's important. i think we all should say it more. so it... so it doesn't have to be something to admit. i don't think it should be a secret.

...

so...?

so what?

so spit it out, then, you goofball! say you're a good person.

well, i... well goodness, now i'm just proving my point.

say it!

only if you do!

fine.

...

i'm... i'm a good person.

...

me too.

hey, that doesn't count, you actually have to say the words.

what words?

"i'm a good person".

ha, you said it again!

...clover.

...

...

clover. i'm not going to force you to say that you're a good person. i'm not going to force you to believe in yourself or anything. but i want you to, because i want you to be happy.

...

...

and i want... i want you to want you to be happy. it shouldn't matter whether or not i want that.

...

...

you don't owe it to anyone else to live a good life... you owe it to yourself. and i know you don't believe me. don't tell me i'm lying because i know, trust me, i might as well be.

...

...fan...

and i guess sometimes you just have to tell that lie to yourself over and over and over again. i know it feels wrong to tell the world that you love the person you are because it feels like a lie. but you know everyone else already believes it. you just have to lie to yourself enough that you start to believe it too.

...heh, and just be delusional?

yeah. delusional. but by the time you believe it along with the rest of the world, you'll forget that it was ever a lie to begin with!

i suppose so.

...

...

...

...so, clover, do you think you'll turn into that beautiful butterfly?

no.

no?

i'll be a moth.

[lonelier-version-of-you]

Elf, spirit, poltergeist, Queen, Castle, Fairy and Unicorn

Elf: What are you proud of?

Hm. That’s a hard question to answer. I suppose I am proud of my writing - I like to think I have something of a way with words.

Spirit: Have you ever been in love?

I don’t know. There are people I have loved, certainly, and people I have had romantic feelings for. I’m not sure I’d say I’ve been in love, though.

I mean, I feel like being in love requires a deeper connection than just having romantic interest in someone, and I find it rather difficult to disentangle romantic feelings from strong platonic ones. So - point is, there are two people I might say I was actually in love with.

And I was really quite young, 8-10, when I knew the first one, so to say I was in love with her feels odd, but it was about as close as one gets at that age, I suppose. I mean, I considered trying to re-establish contact after our friendship ended by sending her a Taylor Swift breakup song (If This Was A Movie, if anyone’s curious) and comparing us to various romantic relationships in media. And I STILL thought “yes, this romantic song and these romantic pairings perfectly describe how I feel about her, but she’s just my Good Platonic Friend” lmfao. Even after I figured out I liked girls, it took me a while to figure out I’d liked that particular girl, lol.

The second one… you know how that turned out. I’ll just say that we were, um, definitely very close. I had very powerful feelings for her but I can’t say, even now, that I know what they were. Coming to grips with what her true intentions were hasn’t helped matters. :/

I’ve never been in a proper romantic relationship though.

Poltergeist: Favourite song lyric?

I have a lot. Just a few of them:

“But don’t you think that I’m a runner / I’ll be coming with my guns up, shootin’ at the moon to bring the sun up” - Nonsense, Madeon

“I know I’m not the center of the universe / but you keep spinning ‘round me just the same” - Heavy, Linkin Park

“I drive fast and I rumble the hardest / I don’t feel alive if I ain’t in the fight” - Hurricane (Johnnie’s Theme), Lord Huron

“I’ve been a teacher and a student of hurt / I’ve kept my word, for whatever that’s worth / never been last, but I’ve never been first / oh, I may not be the best, but I’m far from the worst” - Trouble, Avicii

“I feel like I’m falling, but I’m trying to fly / where does all the good go?” - Miracle, CHVRCHES

Queen: Age?

*points at bio* 16.

Castle: What is something that not a lot of people know about you?

I don’t know that there is much, lol, I like to pretend I’m Deep and Mysterious but I’m actually a massive oversharer.

Oh wait, hang on! I can speak French at about an A2 level. I don’t think many people know that one.

Fairy: What is something that you get excited about?

People showing me basic human kindness.

Also: Good autistic rep, music, space - or cool science stuff in general really, analysing media through a queer lens, and of course soap operas (when they’re actually good).

Unicorn: Who do you look up to?

Greta Thunberg - I really admire her. Seeing an autistic person my age be such a successful activist helping to make real change, and not letting her detractors and their ableist harassment get her down… it’s very inspiring, much as I generally hate to use that word in regard to disabled people.

Tim Bergling (better known as Avicii) - He was an incredibly talented musician with an incredibly generous heart. He gave a lot of his money to charity, and when he got the opportunity to direct one of his own music videos, he used it to raise awareness of human trafficking victims. And despite getting so famous, he never let it get to his head. He just seemed like a really lovely person and I admire him a lot.

Pete Wentz - Honestly, I look up to him because he gives me hope. Because he’s really struggled with mental illness in the past, even attempted suicide once, so much of his life has been so messy and difficult. But… he’s persisted. He’s made it to 40, he’s a famous musician running a record label. And he’s been very open about his mental illness, even the less ‘pretty’ symptoms, and so many of his songs are proudly dedicated to ‘lost kids’, people who experience the world more intensely than others, and it makes me feel like maybe I’m okay, maybe the way I am is okay and maybe I can get through things and just - god I love him so much.

Laura Jane Grace - She’s a badass anarchist and awesome musician who’s proudly trans, what’s not to like? Also it’s just really nice to see an older trans person… out there… existing. Because there are so few role models out there for young trans people to look up to, and that combined with the suicide rates being so high can make it feel really hopeless. So yeah, seeing a trans adult out there achieving things means a lot to me.

[thiscatastrophe]

Taisei, honey. Baby boy. Tallboi supreme, best of friends. My birthday twin. Sweetheart. The moped knight for the eel prince.

This was the hardest fanmix I made so far. Stop making my life difficult, Tai.

Details under the cut. Please enjoy this mix, but check my notes because I considered a LOT of different pieces (so much so that I might make an extended list to collect them!)

CWs: profanity (mine and in the music), some sexual content, minor drug/alcohol references, Macklemore.

1. Hellogoodbye - All time Lows [Zombies! Aliens! Vampires! Dinosaurs!]

“Hey, Tweet, why’s there no Muscles in this mix? Where’s ‘Sweaty?’“ Where’s my dick, hypothetical reader? Fight me. ... When I started the first mix, I told myself I’d stay away from the songs that Mad picked herself as image songs. For Yuudai, it meant no “Kids” or “Somebody that I Used to Know.” For Tai? That cuts out Muscles and, arguably, Passion Pit, a group that she mentioned offhand was basically perfect for him. It’s also one of my all-time favorite groups. Whoops. Initially I wanted to bend my rule juuuust enough to include “Cuddle Fuddle,” but while I was researching some of the songs in the middle of the mix, I noticed that I’d need to replace two songs anyway because they just didn’t fit as well as I thought they would (Kero Kero Bonito’s “Flamingo” and Tokyo Police Club’s “Your English is Good”). So why not keep myself to my original rules and cut “Cuddle Fuddle?” That put me in a pretty tight spot, so I actually dug into my old CD collection looking for inspiration. I passed up all the 2005 party jams on my aunt’s old Christmas gift mix and found... Hellogoodbye! One of their earliest albums, and one of the first CDs I bought back when that was a big deal to me (and CDs were still a thing that people regularly bought). It took me back to mid-high school, when I was a giddier person and I spent my days mucking about with my friends, trying new and creative ways of making ourselves look like fools. That pre-2010 lighthearted nonsense made me think of Tai, so I selected a song that seemed to have fitting lyrics for him (E.g. hideously optimistic) and called it a day. Whew.

2. Ludo - Girls on Trampolines [Ludo]

Another song from my high school years, when I had more energy and everything was a little more exciting. This one was actually a little hard to find, so I apologize for the audio quality--I couldn’t really find an unrestricted YT version with better sound. For me, this song is incredibly imaginative and detailed. It sounds like one of my weirder friends from my youth, catching me up on a long and hilarious (but in a “you kind of had to be there” way) story. Taisei, bless his heart, seems like the kind of guy who would spend a lot of time and emotional energy telling you a long, involved story about a party excursion gone wrong. Also, there were girls on trampolines! Tai likes ladies. Ladies are good. Tai’s got good taste in life.

3. Anamanaguchi - MEOW [Endless Fantasy]

Anamanaguchi returns! I had to pick a counterpart piece to the Jiro mix’s “Pastel Flags,” and I wanted something with a similar energy, but a little more manic instead of steady and driving. “MEOW” is one of those all-over-the-place songs where you’re just kind of along for the colorful, fantastic ride, and by the end you’re a little exhausted but also pretty stoked. What just happened? Taisei happened. Upbeat chiptunes, I think, were a good way to capture his energy and excitement in the same way that low-fi chillout helped pin down Jiro’s anxious, observant nature.

4. Macklemore and Ryan Lewis - Downtown [This Unruly Mess I’ve Made]

Shh. I know, it’s another white rapper. I know he’s problematic. But come on! He has the only dope song about mopeds in the known universe! Besides, the scope of this song is really impressive, and it feels like just the theatrical bullshit Taisei could jam with. It’s catchy and happy and it’s the single coolest song about mopeds ever.

5. Grouplove - Tongue Tied [Never Trust a Happy Song]

When I use music to plan out stories, I always have this playing for sudden-falling-in-love scenes. The beginning is just so magical to me; it sounds exactly like the moment when your heart does flips and it dawns on you. Oh. That’s what that feeling is. Besides that, the whole song is very sweet and tender in a kind of over-the-top, too much energy way. It’s an audio version of a big, fumbling child trying to handle suddenly being in love.

6. Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran - Everything Has Changed [Red]

And this is the aftermath. You had the fall-in-love moment, and now your whole day’s kind of in shambles, but the good kind. This one fulfills the ballad requirement. But wait! It’s not sad? We’re getting to the bittersweet part. Be patient.

7. Bruno Mars - That’s What I Like [24K Magic]

Taisei is 50% legs, 50% pure cash. He’s always willing to pay for his friends, and Mad’s hinted that he showers his girlfriends in affection (and gifts, presumably). He’s got the money to be a fantastic gifter, especially for his age range and social standing. Who’s to say he doesn’t fantasize about spoiling his lovers?

8. Frank Turner - If Ever I Stray [England Keep My Bones]

This is where the Taisei mix gets bitersweet. I have a theory that Tai has an underlying depressive issue--it seems like sadness comes pretty easily to him, even though he tends to be very positive and happy. In the scene in his office, Jiro and Genkei did their best to keep him in good spirits, and he trusted them to help him back to his happier self. My theory is that relying on the people he cares about is an explicitly-stated coping mechanism that Taisei uses to stay healthy. He needs people around him to hold him up, and he knows that isn’t a bad thing--he loves having people he can rely on. And sometimes, relying on them means trusting them to snap him back to reality when he gets overwhelmed. Keep trusting your pals, Tai.

This list ended up being really pop heavy! I think it was said somewhere that Tai is probably a pophead? So I guess it fits.

Here are the honorable mentions that didn’t quite make it:

Passion Pit - Cuddle Fuddle

Kero Kero Bonito - Flamingo

Tokyo Police Club - Your English is Good

Does It Offend You, Yeah? - Let’s Make Out

Group Tamashii - I Want to Buy You Some Juice

Basement Jaxx - Where’s Your Head At

OK GO - I Won’t Let You Down

Madeon - OK

[alairia]

1-100 pleeeease :)

eSpotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify

is your room messy or clean? clean I can’t really stand messy rooms

what color are your eyes? green!

do you like your name? why? it’s alright, it’s just my aunt’s name with an extra n (Adrianna is my name btw)

what is your relationship status? single 

describe your personality in 3 words or less: shy, nerd, and compassionate

what color hair do you have? plum!

what kind of car do you drive? color? don’t have a car but I would totally love a Jeep

where do you shop? Forever 21 sometimes, rue 21, and online shops

how would you describe your style? very plain a graphic t-shirt jeans and sneakers pretty much but rare times I do dress up “nice”

favorite social media account? Tumblr or Twitter, been getting into Pinterest more

what size bed do you have? Queen!

any siblings? one older sister and one younger brother

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? Colorado or Washington for the simple reason I LOVEEE the cold weather

favorite snapchat filter? the one that makes your eyes and lips really huge 

favorite makeup brand(s)? NYX, wet n wild, and covergirl

how many times a week do you shower? about 3/4 

favorite tv show? Law and Order 

shoe size? 9

how tall are you? I’m 5′4

sandals or sneakers? sneakers sandals normally hurt my feet

do you go to the gym? I work out from home since I have an in home gym

describe your dream date? I’m pretty easy to go on dates with probably going to a shelter seeing a movie then some dinner something like that

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? $40

what color socks are you wearing? none

how many pillows do you sleep with? 3

do you have a job? what do you do? yes I’m the family bum ;3; 

how many friends do you have? OH DEAR, i have 1 REALLY close friend (tori ily) then just 8 friends I talk to online a lot and none irl :-(

whats the worst thing you have ever done? probably steal an egg when I was like 8

whats your favorite candle scent? i currently have this mango salsa candle that smell soooo amazing

3 favorite boy names? Noah, Henry, and Michael

3 favorite girl names? Valerie, Raven, and Savannah

favorite actor? Cole Sprouse

favorite actress? Gal Gadot

who is your celebrity crush? Cole Sprouse

favorite movie? Interstellar

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? not as often, my favorite book would have to be of mice and men by john steinbeck

money or brains? brains

do you have a nickname? what is it? Adri short for Adrianna

how many times have you been to the hospital? oh gosh plenty of times probably 10/15 maybe more

top 10 favorite songs? welcome to the jungle by guns n roses, passionfruit by drake, location by khalid, rollin by calvin harris, future, khalid, fake happy by paramore, told you so by paramore, oui by jeremih, we belong together by ritchie valens, pixel empire by madeon, and shelter by porter robinson and madeon

do you take any medications daily? nope

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) dry

what is your biggest fear? i have this weird fear of being snipped for some reason? 

how many kids do you want? probably 1 or 2

whats your go to hair style? I normally leave it down since my hair is short but at times i put it up in a ponytail, bun, or braid it

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) quite a large house

who is your role model? my mom

what was the last compliment you received? from my best friend tori about how she’s glad I put up with her 

what was the last text you sent? it was to my friend Jared

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? like 6

what is your dream car? a Jeep

opinion on smoking? I’m normally not a fan of it but if you do it then that’s alright you do you

do you go to college? nope a senior in high school

what is your dream job?probably a successful twitch streamer 

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? suburbs

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? yes of course I do

do you have freckles? yes 

do you smile for pictures? some of them i do or just a weird faces I can make up on the spot

how many pictures do you have on your phone? 183

have you ever peed in the woods? yes lol 

do you still watch cartoons? yeah sometimes I do

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? ooo McDonalds probably 

Favorite dipping sauce? ketchup, I’m a very plain person 

what do you wear to bed? depends, if it’s really hot nothing on and if it’s cold just my underwear and a hoodie

have you ever won a spelling bee? yes 

what are your hobbies? playing video games, digital art, watching anime, cooking and baking

can you draw? i can draw but not that good

do you play an instrument? I used to play the trombone 

what was the last concert you saw? Iron Maiden

tea or coffee? tea

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? starbucks

do you want to get married? yes eventually

what is your crush’s first and last initial? JM

are you going to change your last name when you get married? not quite sure

what color looks best on you? dark colors blacks, greys, and blues

do you miss anyone right now? yeah my best friend tori

do you sleep with your door open or closed? closed

do you believe in ghosts? yes!

what is your biggest pet peeve? when people leave their apps running when they aren’t using it 

last person you called` my mom

favorite ice cream flavor? cookies and cream or neapolitan

regular oreos or golden oreos? regular 

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? rainbow

what shirt are you wearing? a tie dye blue shirt with a cat on it that says hug life

what is your phone background? a bunch of corgis

are you outgoing or shy? shy but with time I’m really outgoing

do you like it when people play with your hair? yesss i love it

do you like your neighbors? yeah I do

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? yes both when i wake up and sleep

have you ever been high? nope 

have you ever been drunk? not really 

last thing you ate? eggs and bacon

favorite lyrics right now? “you’re mine and we belong together, yes we belong together for eternity” 

summer or winter? winter

day or night? night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? milk

favorite month? November since it’s the month of my birthday

what is your zodiac sign? Scorpio

who was the last person you cried in front of? my best friend tori

[skymade]

on blog playlist.

   I feel like I talk about them a lot, but I put a lot of time, thought, and energy into my blog playlists – purely for my own enjoyment! I like them being there, I like listening to them. Music is important to me, and giving my kids “OfficialTM” music is just… fun. The overall feel and all lyrics of the song must be perfectly accurate to the character to be included. ( Therefore, there’s usually a lot of other music that’s on the cusp that’s denied entry, so to speak. )

     Willow’s blog playlist comes from a variety of genres, but they’re mostly upbeat, dance-y music. It is definitely in chronological order. 

Living in Another World by Neon Trees “They’ve been telling me to come of age, I’ve been going through an awkward phase  They’ve been trying hard to wake me up, singing stuff that never gets me off  Don’t mind me, I’m living in another world!  Don’t mind me, I’m living in another world!” 

   We start off with the Neon Trees, spelling what it’s like for Willow as a teen, to be in her own little world, consistently. It has a whimsical, sort of “soft angst” feel that completely resonates with my poor angel. 

The City by Madeon  “There is a place in the distance,  A place that I’ve been dreaming of  Time and space don’t exist and  We can dance like there’s no tomorrow  There is a place! Oh, time and space...!” 

   This song echoes a lot of the previous song’s feelings -- but rather than believing she’s living in another world, she’s wishing she was. It comes right after her mother and Winter disappear ( I had what I wanted -- it went away so fast. ), and begins her pining for being among the stars. 

Fly Away by Lenny Kravitz “Let's go and see the stars The Milky Way, Or even Mars Where it could just be ours Let's fade into the sun Let your spirit fly Where we are one Just for a little fun Oh oh, oh yeah! I want to get away I want to fly away Yeah yeah yeah!”

   More pining to get off of this sky-forsaken planet, and imagining what it would be like to just fly away from everything. This music is very indicative of her style at the time, as well. 

I Don’t Care by Fallout Boy “Erase myself and let go, Start it over again in Mexico These friends, they don't love you They just love the hotel suites! Now I don't care what you think, As long as it's about me The best of us can find happiness, in misery!”

   This rock song appears as Willow starts dating a lot of people that hold no affection for her. They don’t care about her, just about her status, just about the fact that she’s another lay. But that’s okay, because she’s still finding happiness in this misery, and she doesn’t care what they think -- as long as it’s about her.  

I Just Wanna Run by The Downton Friction “I just wanna run  I’m out here all alone  I try to call your house  Can’t reach you on the phone I gather up my nerve  I’m packing up my bag  It’s more than you deserve  Don’t treat me like a drag!  I’m feeling like I keep on talking, I’m repeating, Myself my words lost all meaning  I keep talking, I repeat myself  I just wanna run! Hide it away Run because they’re chasing me down I just wanna run Throw it away Run before they’re finding me out I just wanna run!” 

   But you know? No. Even if she has relationships here, fuck this. She wants to leave Amyr. She’s done with these people abusing her. She’s sick of being treated like shit. She’s getting out of here, before they can stop her. 

Watch Me by Icon for Hire “I am not afraid to fall You can watch me lose it all I'll get it wrong, 'til I get it right At least I'm making scenes in the meantime!” 

   So, here she is. She’s leaving. Watch Her! :) This song is very clearly directed to those that Willow feels like don’t do anything, don’t reach out and force themselves to achieve their dreams. ... A little bit at Tallow, because she’s finding him at this point. Also, as an aside? I love the titles leading up here. I don’t care; I just wanna run... watch me! 

Message Man by 21 Pilots  “The loser hides behind A mask of my disguise And who I am today Is worse than other times You don't know what I've done I'm wanted and on the run I'm wanted and on the run So I'm taking this moment to live in the future.” 

   And this is where she leaves Amyr. She’s wanted and on the run, finally, now that she’s off, with Tallow! She’s free! Wanted, on the run, but free! 

Weak by AJR “One sip? Bad for me One hit? Bad for me One kiss? Bad for me But I give in so easily! And no, thank you!  Is how it should've gone I should stay strong... But I'm weak, and what's wrong with that? Boy, oh boy, I love it when I fall for that! I'm weak, and what's wrong with that? Boy, oh boy, I love it when I fall for that!” 

   Willow only feels the barest, slightest of regret at loving her ‘habits’ now that Tallow so vehemently opposes them, and though she’s “trying”... skies, who cares? She’s weak, and what’s wrong with that! This begins introducing, as well, the electropop genre that more or less follows us throughout the rest of the playlist. 

One of the Drunks by Panic! at the Disco  “Never dry Every day you're thirsty Bourbon high Sip until you're tipsy Night's young Searching for a feeling  Big fun Dancing with the demons, oh, Holy Spirit, Holy Spirit Grips you like a pistol, Wet the whistle, wet the whistle Abyss of ice crystals Every weekend with your friends Every weekday when it ends Damn it's all good... I guess. ... This is what it feels like when you become one of the drunks! This is what it feels like when you become one of the drunks! Searching for a new high, high as the sun, uncomfortably numb This is what it feels like when you become one of the drunks Welcome to the club!”    

   All regret is gone -- Willow is excited to be one of the drunks. Night’s young! She’s drinking, partying with people on different planets! She’s doing everything she’s ever wanted! Damn, it’s all good! ... I... ... guess... 

Young and Menace by Fallout Boy “And I lived so much life, lived so much life I think that God is gonna have to kill me twice Kill me twice like my name was Nikki Sixx I woke up in my shoes again but somewhere you exist, singing, Oops, I Did it again, I Forgot what I was losing my mind about I only wrote this down to MAKE YOU PRESS REWIND AND SEND A MESSAGE, I WAS YOUNG, AND A MENACE!”

   Of course, Willow’s always been young and a menace, but the more she Travels, and the more danger she gets into, the more she starts messing up. And the happier she is about that. She’s not giving any of this up, no sirree. 

Dancing’s Not a Crime by Panic! at the Disco “I’m a moonwalker! I’m like MJ up in the clouds  I know it sounds awkward I’m filthy as charged, filthy as charged You’re a sweet talker  But darlin’, what’chu gonna say now? The midnight marauders  The higher never come down, never come down You can’t take me anywhere, anywhere You can’t take me anywhere, anywhere I’m still uninvited, I’m still gonna light it I’m going insane and I don’t care!  Whatever they tell you,  Dancing, dancing, dancing’s not a crime  Unless you do it without me.” 

   One of the quintessential Willow songs -- Dancing’s Not a Crime. Every line in here speaks to her a little too well. My little partier is truly, genuinely starting to enjoy herself out here, and fully grow into who she’s going to be in the future. 

Sober by Lorde  “Oh God, I'm clean out of air, in my lungs It's all gone Played it so nonchalant It's time we danced with the truth Move along with the truth We're sleeping through all the days I'm acting like I don't see, Every ribbon you used to tie yourself to me.” 

   This song comes around the time that Mila becomes a more permanent fixture in Willow’s life. At some points, this song is directed at Mila, Tallow, and Riddon. The but what will we do when we’re sober? line spells Willow’s terror of the high of Traveling and excitement crashing. What will she do when Mila captures them and grounds her back to Earth?

But It’s Better If You Do by Panic! at the Disco  “And isn't this, exactly where you'd like me? I'm exactly where you'd like me, you know Praying for love in a lap dance And paying in naivety Woah! But I’m Afraid That I Well, I may have faked it.” 

   This is completely after Tallow leaves and Mila abuses her, and is completely directed at the two of them. She’s alone, now, searching people, places, things out -- praying for love, and paying in naivety. All of it, actually. They’ve taken all of it with them. 

Hypnotized by A Lion Named Roar  “I stand and watch you take your potion Are you feeling something, Something you came to forget? And I know you hate this double vision Still the life that you're living They hide in your silhouette Yeah, I got my games and my vices, And I feel a little self righteous, Usually I'm never like this.”

   This song is really... completely just directed at Willow, and how she can make other people hypnotized with her -- usually with the idea of her -- and just... really how she’d look to other people, in this horrible hole that she’s in after she loses Mila and Tallow. 

Don’t Threaten Me With a Good Time by Panic! at the Disco “Champagne, cocaine, gasoline And most things in between I roam the city in a shopping cart A pack of camels and a smoke alarm This night is heating up Raise hell and turn it up Saying, "If you go out you might pass out in a drain pipe" Oh yeah! Don't threaten me with a good time It's a hell of a feeling though, It's a hell of a feeling though! Alright, alright! It's a hell of a feeling though, It's a hell of a feeling though! What are these footprints? ... They don't look very human-like Now I wish that I could find my clothes...”

   And... hilariously, this is her horrible life from her perspective. Its beginning repeating alright, alright is sort of her brushing herself off, focusing on continuing her life and her partying... even after all of this shit she’s been subjected to. 

Cut the Kid by Madeon 

   We end with another Madeon song -- this one with no feature, so basically instrumental. The cut words are reminiscent of Willow attempting to speak coherent words Ever, and really loops this playlist to a close. Some of the more instrumental moments give the song an almost... sad or pained quality, honestly, so it’s perfect to close up here with it. In pain, but still her!

   And that’s a wrap!