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#(really like what they’re doing it’s just hurting me personally)
strangemaleswaps · 1 day
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Strange Spellbook Swap
I've always wondered how couples stay together so long. My husband, Derek, and I had been married for 3 years now and while we get along great and support each other through everything, the sex had been pretty stale for awhile. Half the time he's not really in the mood and when he is, we usually just jerk off next to each other. I was getting tired of it and craved something more. But Derek was still so cute, him being a socially awkward nerd, and I was scared to tell him how I feel because he might cry.
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That afternoon, I was on my way to pick him up from work. We only had one car, but since both our jobs typically had the same shift, I always headed over to pick him up at his job at the library. I didn't actually have work today so I went a little earlier to look at some books. When I arrived, Derek noticed me and smiled real big.
“Hey! You're early!”
“Yeah, thought I'd browse a bit.”
“Ah ok. I just organized it all so you get to see my work!” He smiled again and continued helping customers in line.
I browsed through my favorite genre - fantasy. I always loved ones that involved magic, spells, and amazing worlds. I noticed one book that kinda stuck out a bit amongst the shelf. It was some kind of spellbook with a brown leather cover, and had a bit of dust on it, which seemed strange because the rest of the shelf was perfectly clean. I opened it up and found that it was indeed a spellbook. I wasn't the most superstitious person ever, but I did believe there was some kind of magical force out there that could do incredible things.
I flipped through the table of contents and noticed there was a category called “relationships”. I turned the pages to the section and saw a bunch of spells - ones to make someone fall in love with you, ones to get promoted at work, ones to impress your family, things like that. I was about to close the book when I found one page - how to spice up your sex life. That was just what I needed! Even if it didn't work, it couldn't hurt to try.
I walked over to the counter right as another guy started talking to Derek. He was a real muscular guy wearing a white shirt and tan hat. His pants left absolutely nothing to the imagination with the way they were tight fitting around his ass. A mustache covered his thick face, which complemented his bright green eyes. He was carrying a tote bag.
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“Hey can I help you?” He greeted the man with an eager attitude. “Need a book recommendation or anything?”
“Oh no I don't read.” The man spoke with a deep manly voice. “I mean, who has time to when you could be working out?” I could see the rare irritated look on Derek's face.
“Then…what do you need from the library?” He replied, much less eager than before.
“Just dropping off some books for the wife. We're going on vacation and they’re due tomorrow.” He took a couple books out of the tote bag.
“Allright. I can take them.” The man handed him the books and immediately turned around and left. Derek's smile returned when he saw me with a book in my hand.
“Hey! What'd you get?”
“It's a book of spells.”
“Of spells? Like real ones?”
“No way,” I laughed. “Just some dumb thing. Looks fun to read though.”
“Allright. Gotcha.” He checked me out and I sat down, waiting for him to finish the rest of the closing.
That evening after dinner I tried to seduce him but he wasn't having it once again.
“Sorry, work has me so exhausted you know?” I wish that I wanted to, but…well I just don't want to. Sorry.” I stood there defeated.
“Ok.” I let out an emotionless reply. As Derek brushed his teeth and got ready to head into bed, I flipped through the pages of the spellbook. I found the “spice up your sex life” spell and read the instructions. I needed to recite the incantation while looking at a picture of the two of us. I took out my phone, and scrolled through my gallery until I found the perfect picture. Then I started to recite the spell. Nothing happened. I tried again. Still nothing. At that point I was mad at him and now mad at the spellbook for wasting my time, so I headed into the bedroom. There I found Derek waiting for me.
“Hey…look I'm sorry. How about tomorrow morning we have some fun? I promise I'll go through with it!” Maybe the spell did work afterall! We both had a day off tomorrow so that was perfect. I was so excited that I could barely sleep.
The next morning I woke up to Derek nudging me awake. Excitedly, I turned over. But to my surprise, it wasn't him smiling at me, but a hairy guy with a mustache. He was giving me a sexy smile.
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“Hey…you ready?” He gave me a look of uncertainty and cleared his throat. I didn't even know what to say but I was so confused that there was total stranger in my bed, so I had to say something.
“Who are…you?” He frowned beneath his mustache.
“What do you mean? Oh no, am I having an allergic reaction somehow? That would explain my voice and why my eyesight is blurry even with my glasses on. It's me though! My face must be so puffy…oh god."
”Holy fuck. It's Derek! But this was far beyond an allergic reaction. He's an entirely different person! He pushed the covers off and was about to get out of bed, probably to take a look at himself in the mirror, when he glanced down at his body. This was definitely not normal. He was muscular, tan, and hairy - a stark contrast to what he normally looked like. He made a terrified face, which was a strange sight on such a macho guy.
“What? What's happening? I-I…” He looked at me with worry in his eyes, and it was then that I realized WHY this was happening. It must've been the spell. I guess turning your boyfriend into a muscle hunk would definitely spice up our sex lives. But I couldn't leave him in the dark.
“I-I,” I started. “It was my fault. That spellbook I got, I used it on you. I didn't expect this though!”
It was then that I realized WHO he was. That guy we saw at the library yesterday. He somehow swapped bodies with him!
“What? What spell was it?”
“Spice up your sex life. I just…was getting bored. And you were never in the mood.”
“Oh…but it turned me into this?” He then rushed to the bathroom. I followed. He immediately recognized himself as soon as he looked into the mirror.
“Hey! I'm that guy from yesterday!? Why did it turn me into him?”
“I-I don't know! Maybe it picked someone from a recent memory?”
He gazed at himself in the mirror with an open mouth, and touched all around his face, pinching and feeling his mustache.He gazed down and admired his new muscles, feeling all around his pecs and the chest hair growing from them. He then turned around and stared at the mirror again, this time making a variety of expressions.
“What am I supposed to do? I can't stay like this!”
“I don't know! There must be something about a reverse spell in the book.” Flipping through the book, I once again found the page I needed. I read every word but didn't find anything about a reverse spell. Could he be stuck like this?
“Maybe if we see like a professional?”
“What, like a fortune teller witch lady or whatever?”
“Exactly.”
“Well. I do remember seeing something like that close to town. A psychic. Maybe they can help?”
“We could try.” I looked up fortune tellers and found Madam Cleo - Psychic. It was a short drive away. I was hoping we would find our answers there.
“I got it.”
“One problem,” Derek said doubtfully.
“What?” He stared down at himself and then answered.
“I don't think anything will fit me now…” I couldn't help but laugh out loud.“I think we can find something at least.”
We dug through the closet and eventually found the Lakers jersey that my uncle gifted me a few years back. I wasn't even into basketball and it was a few sizes too big, but at least it helped us in the end! Derek slipped it on and gazed at himself in the mirror. It fit pretty nicely.
“Not really my style…but it'll do for now.” He put his finger on his chin and then rubbed his head. He froze when he grazed the back of it.
“What’s wrong?”
“I'm…balding.” He turned around and tilted his head up to show me. He definitely had a bad case of male pattern baldness. I thought it was pretty hot, but he looked terrified.
“Hmm…well. That's something we can just fix with a hat. I walked into the bedroom, grabbed one of my hats, and put it on his head. It completed the look well.
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“I guess this'll work. Maybe.” I laughed again.
“You'll be fine.”
We got to the car, Derek struggling a bit to fit in the passenger seat with his new frame, and headed over to the fortune teller. It was a warehouse-like building, although much smaller. As we were about to walk in, someone else walked out. He was a young looking guy around my age, but at least 200 lbs heavier. He looked like he made absolutely no effort to control his weight.
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“Hey! That lady is awesome!” He said excitedly. “She told my fortune and said that I would lose weight very soon! I can't wait!” He then ran off, his gross looking belly jiggling up and down, and drove away.
I kinda felt bad for people like that, that actually believe that sort of thing…what am I saying? We're the ones going to a fortune teller for help. I just really hoped she was legit then.
We walked in and found that the interior was nicely decorated, completely different from the outside. Shiny wooden floors, a chandelier, and LED lights hanging from the walls. All of that surrounded a crystal ball in the center. Within a few seconds a woman dressed in a typical fortune teller outfit appeared from a curtain in the back.
“What does the future hold for you two today? Let's find out,” she said with an ominous tone to her voice.
“Actually we're not here to get our fortunes told. We need your help.”
“What do you mean? She asked, dropping the ominous tone.
“Well my husband here is a victim to a body swapping spell gone wrong.” I showed her the book, flipping to the page.
“Oh my,” she said with a concerned look on her face. “This is very powerful magic indeed.”
“But how do we reverse it?”
“I don't know for sure. But the victim should try to recite it instead.
“Victim? You mean Derek? How would that work?”
“Do not question why things are the way they are. Now go!” She said suddenly. With that, we hurried back home to recite the spell.
“Ok how do I do this now?” Derek asked.
“Just recite the spell, and focus on a picture of us.” He recited the incantation.
“Nothing happened…how was it last time?”
“Same as this time. I guess it took awhile to take effect. What should we do in the meantime?” He didn't reply, but instead stared at himself in the mirror.
“You know, now that this face actually has a brain behind it, it's actually kinda hot.” He then walked over to me and got real close. I'd never been intimidated by Derek before for obvious reasons, but this time I couldn't help but feel dominated by his brawny self.
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“The spell picked this guy because you thought he was so hot didn't it? That's gotta be it.” He said with a low voice.
“Y-yeah. I admit it. He seemed dumb at the library but hey, he was a hunk.”
“And now I'm that hunk.” He started feeling all around his body again. He then glanced at his dick and began to stroke it. I knew exactly where this was going and I was all for it.
“Well then Mr. Muscle Hunk, why don't you show off that body a bit more?”
“I'd like nothing more…but I'm gonna go shower first. Who knows where this guy's been?”
“Yeah good idea. I'll be in the room.”
I was so excited! This was gonna be the hottest thing ever! I headed toward the closet to find something sexy to put on. Suddenly I felt a bit dizzy. I noticed my skin seemed to be glowing somehow. Within seconds it turned ghostly white, and then became so bright, it hurt to look at. Why was I glowing? It seemed to be just my body though, nothing was happening to my clothes. As quickly as it came, the glowing stopped and the dizziness returned. I didn't have time to see what happened, because as soon as the glow stopped I lost my balance and fell onto the nearby chair.
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My clothes felt incredibly tight, but it wasn't long before I realized why. I was fat! My shirt didn't even fit over my large belly. My pants must've popped a button as my gut hung over them. I tried to get up but the weight of my gut kept pushing me backwards. How do fat guys even do this?
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When I finally got up and onto my feet, I rushed to the mirror, my hanging belly flopping up and down. My face looked familiar…oh shit. I was that guy we saw at the fortune teller's! Did the spell do this? How did this happen?!
I heard the shower stop, meaning Derek was going to meet me here any minute now. I couldn't believe the hottest night of my life was about to be ruined! Why did this have to happen?
The door opened and there he was, standing there in a pair of briefs. They were always a little big on him, but with his new body, they were pretty tight. It looked like he shaved his head too. He stared at me, at first he looked shocked but then his expression changed. Was that a look of lust?
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“So the spell did something to you too?”
“Yeah…look at me! I'm a mess!” I jiggled my flabby moobs to prove my point.
“Well…”
“Well?”
“It's not so bad.”
“What? What do you mean?”
“I mean…well you know how you said I look hot like this? And that the spell probably made me like this for that reason?”
“Yeah. What are you getting at…wait.”
“Mhm.” He mumbled with a sexy smirk.
“Y-you think I'm hot like this?!" He got real close and started making out with me. It was the most intense make out session I'd ever had. The feeling of his thick mustache rubbing against my face was a sensation I would've never expected could feel so good.
“Does that answer your question?”
“Yep,” I said with a smirk.
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firelightmlpoc · 23 hours
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Hey, just wanted to say good on you for standing up against the completely batshit accusations that have been thrown around the fandom lately. I cannot fathom how anyone believed those screenshots for even a second. I doubt you’ll get an answer, since the harassers are stuck in an echo chamber of validating their actions and will likely just stick their heads in the sand and pretend they can’t hear you. It sucks ass, but seeing that there are at least some people who will publicly question this bullshit is refreshing.
Of course. There’s a reason ‘innocent until proven guilty’ is something that’s supposed to be a baseline for an accusation of actions that have caused harm. After all, if someone makes a false accusation that then is treated as true, then another innocent person gets harmed, & then the waters get muddied for any other accusations thereafter.
After all, if someone lied about harm done & then makes another accusation, who’s to say that accusation isn’t just another lie? Something-something, ‘boy who cried wolf’. Then it also makes any other accusations in the nearby vicinity seem lest trustworthy because people don’t want to be wrong again.
Some people solely jumped on this hate-train specifically because it was against Pansear Doodles, & wouldn’t have interacted with this accusation at all if it didn’t center around someone they didn’t already dislike.
You want proof? Easy.
Look at the accounts saying ‘I always knew that Pansear was bad! Good to get proven right…’ and then look at their accounts. Almost always, they’ve been bashing Pansear (and other artists who do shipping of Slugcats & other similar art) because they just didn’t like the topic. And, instead of just acknowledging that they don’t like that content & moving on, they internalize that dislike & then try to find a reason to attach said dislike to the author. Then, they look for anything the author did wrong (be it true or not) & suddenly cry out:
‘I was right all along for hating this person!!!’
There’s an account that replied to my earlier post which REALLY clearly shows this in action.
@hourglass-meadow .
This reply is what they said.
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An ask they responded to directly about Pansear. (Long-winded, yadayada.)
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Their response:
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And their first response to seeing Pansear gone.
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Now, you know how many posts they made about Pansear potentially being a problem? None, except for the ArtiHunter comic, which has nothing actually ’problematic’ within. What about an ‘I hope the victim can find peace…’? Nonexistent.
These people don’t care if these allegations are true or not.
They don’t care who else gets hurt in this mess, as long as it isn’t someone in their circle.
They just want to see a ‘bad guy’ who is someone they don’t like get punished.
They want to claim their righteousness for all the world to see, as they cast judgement; a lynching in the court of public opinion.
And all of this targeting, IF this is fake, is more-or-less because people didn’t like seeing Pansear & others making /shipping/ art.
Because they saw someone else making something that THEY deemed ‘weird.’
There’s something to be said about the current political climate here, be it the Puritanical aspect of eliminating anything ’other’, ‘weird’, or ‘disgusting’ from sight no matter how innocuous/harmless it is;
the ‘Guilty until Proven Innocent’ mindset going around that makes actual victims more liable to not out their abuser out of concern for what will happen to their abuser (As, statistically speaking, abusers tend to be someone close to the abused, before abuse starts.)
Or even just the fact that people are simply emboldened to be as shitty as possible while they believe they’re anonymous online, because they’re of the mindset that they’re immune to consequences because they aren’t being directly known by these internet people in-person.
Don’t believe me? Look at every account celebrating Pansear’s self-eviction from the Rainworld community. Look at their actions & words from before this accusation. And then check what I said again. Cross reference this shit. See that the majority don’t care if there was a victim, much less if the potential victim is ok now or not; they just wanted someone they didn’t like, for one arbitrary reason or another, gone.
Cruelty was the point of many people’s actions against Pansear here, & by jove did they get what they wanted.
Remember folks! Remember this well:
No matter how much you align with leopards-that-eat-people’s-faces, the leopards won’t think twice about your face being next on their dinner plate.
That’s enough words from me for the time being, however.
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vigilskeep · 2 days
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i’m going to make a couple speculations about veilguard and put them under the cut here rather than just tagging for spoilers, because they’re based on some of the most spoilery details we have so far, which are only in a couple videos or mentioned by a couple people in a way that says to me they maybe weren’t really part of what was supposed to be shared. so just only open it if you’ve been watching absolutely everything
1. i’ve seen a couple of people (please don’t ask me to find them i’ve completely lost track of what i heard where) mention a decision at or near the end of act 1 where you have to choose between two cities (to save?). given the locations we’ve seen, it’s likely to be a choice between minrathous or treviso. i’ve also seen neve, who loves minrathous more than anything, with an apparently approval-based status that makes her bond-with-you progress slower, makes her completely unable to use supportive spells, and makes her damage spells stronger. do you see where i’m going with this
2. caterina gives us the mission to go get lucanis, but when we return to treviso with him, we’re told she’s been killed in a venatori attack. this is an insane character, with such presence and threat, to show and then suddenly kill off-screen. there’s a few directions they could take this. firstly, there’s no body so maybe she’s alive and the venatori took her for something the same way they took lucanis. secondly, there’s no body so maybe she’s faking her death for, uhhh, some reason. and thirdly, hey, does anyone else think it’s kind of crazy that caterina gets taken out as soon as we come back with the potential person she might name as heir instead of illario? wild timing, right? i’m just saying i would support whoever might or might not have had intense personal motivation to make that happen, and also to then cover it up by, say, blaming the woman lucanis already wants to kill, and then insisting they also be there when that woman is killed, possibly to further cover up what they did. and is in this scene wearing a green belt sash. and whose name rhymes with jillario
3. in videos people keep visually hovering over the decision to trust in varric’s plan to talk down solas or to dissuade him, while they’re talking about how much choices actually matter. we know that it’s possible for him to get stabbed with the dagger and be laid up in the lighthouse “hurt”, but i wonder if that’s only one variation, and we’re actually going to have a real impact there on how much damage is done?
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grendil2 · 15 hours
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Oh and by the way “sex kitten programming” is a fucked up techie term dropped by multiple people. I didn’t make it up or something.
It started with posts from anons claiming to have worked in tech but were inexplicably pushed out. These were posts from now long-eradicated forums and later discords. But discords are constantly eradicated to prevent cohesion among white Christians or the construction of archives and the spreading of knowledge, obviously.
Anyway “Sex kitten programming” (🤮) as a term probably no longer gets used because it’s been mutated into something else, or perhaps it got lumped in with a more generalized term. Maybe it’s just “programming” now, since there are now so many kinds. But one thing everyone remembers is that the term was sort of used a bit by people, and would have been swiftly forgotten, but then every Fed in the fucking world started using it suddenly.
Feds actually use the term from time to time, to this day, as their “grain of truth” in an otherwise lie-filled disinformation posts. To give the lies more validity. Or something? Obviously because the term is so icky, one can’t help but be driven by one’s own cruelty and ignorance into thinking the guy who used the term (me lol) made it up himself and is possibly some sort of creepy psycho? So maybe that’s the purpose of using it so often. But no, it is (or was) a real, actual term.
It basically means using content recommendations to push little white girls into increasingly perverted sexual stuff until they leave the gene pool. Yes they do incel-programming type stuff to white girls, and starting as early as they get a phone and the camera sees their white skin. The goal is, naturally, to “cut off the children of the goyim” as the Skeksis have been instructed to do by God.
The content, well curated for a decade (by now I assume) and driven by psychology and AI, gradually warps the child’s perception of men and the world. They go especially hard on this during puberty. Content is gradually introduced into the feed. News stories, sob stories, historical villains, cartoon Characters. All made up, all designed to leverage a white Girl’s perception of men, until she’s a childless incel.
You’ve met white girl victims of this everywhere, and few are unscathed, really only golem freemartin white girls escape it. (The AI flags allies.)
The content gradually lowers the innocent girl into an utterly psychotic world view, which is often seen and accepted as a joke in their teenage years, but then grows all too real as they grow up. Their personality is permanently shifted by it against their will or ability to remember how it all started. This is how it works really, time and exposure.
In the face of their curated, warped reality they either become fujoshis longing for normal white kindness (warped into homosexuality) or adapt to the false world pragmatically and become whores. Spiritually hurting themselves. Onlyfans and dancing for old white boomers and brown men (metrics show that this is the case.) This path is very, very, bitterly common. More common than you might think. This is also the most common type of corruption that leads them to racemix. I should clarify that I hate this world and I want God to save the little white mice but he just doesn’t seem to care.
There’s also the third option, rage against the false world and become vicious radfems (this is where their hatred truly comes from), who are also often TERFs and would be wife material if they understood the depth and complexity of what the Skeksis have inflicted on them. I say wife material because in the face of this inescapable process, the radfem path is the most righteous by a mile. If real men really acted like they did in their false world, radfems would be the last white women with Christian values. That’s just true!!!! Also they’re the only ones who seem to hate evil.
Anyway Zuckerberg started Facebook for pervy shit, do you really think that the people who wanted to use phones to brainwash people wouldn’t start by being creeps? Do you really think it never occurred to them that they could use it to brainwash white girls into becoming sex slaves? (Or at least spiritually destroyed and afraid to reproduce? Or afraid of any relationship?) There are Skeksis-directed big-budget 80s movies with this plot line, they were excited about it! They still are! Surely the process is improving!
No wonder the feds freaked out. The older supervisor probably saw all the posts about it: “Hey I recognize that term, that’s what we used to call it back in my day! Quick, spread the term around next to false information to discredit it! Hurry!”
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vincentpriceofficial · 2 months
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I’m so far away from wanting Louis and Lestat to get back together I’m just really compelled by the situation of them like, needing one another because their daughter is dead and there’s only one other person in the world who can share that grief with them, but also knowing they cannot be together for very good reasons (they tried again and again for years and it never worked; Lestat is not a safe person)
And then also unfortunately they make each other more horny than anyone has ever been in the history of human sentience. Like the rest of the above situation would be conceivably something you could navigate but unfortunately they will always want to fuck each other so so so so so so bad
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heartual · 1 month
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had such a good experience with surgery today i can’t even fully explain
#🍄.txt#i’m so happy that fuck ass doctor referred me to another doctor in the building because he was so nice and attentive#taking the time to explain things to me and make sure i was good#even said oh well if ur really uncomfortable we can always go to the operating room! :)#when the other doctor treated me like a nuisance the whole time and like some dumb child#well if you can’t sit still they’re going to have to put you under elsewhere 🙄#I DIDNT EVEN FUCKING KNOW THEY COULD DO THAT IN THE BUILDING? SHE MADE IT SEEM LIKE I WAS INCONVENIENCING HER THE WHOLE TIME#i was asking a bunch of questions because knowing makes me feel less nervous and he answered everything so clearly even when my mom was#asking questions too#recommending me different medications to keep this from happening again etc etc etc#so fucking bare minimum for a doctor but it was so nice seriously i wish i could thank him again for making it a more#comfortable experience#he put numbing shots on the inside AND outside of my lid just in case we needed to go from the outside this time#and while it hurt obviously it was so much better than the single shot she gave me the first time three weeks ago#she told me this would be a much more extensive surgery and here i am with my eyelid barely swollen 😐#i could barely see with it open three weeks ago immediately after because it hurt too much and was so swollen#what the fuck how do you have such contrasting experiences with two people who literally work together in the same building#anyway bad doctor experiences are always so fucking bad but when you have a really good experience it just feels crazy and insane#like wow thank u for treating me like a person#did i mention i actually left with care instructions this time written out. and the medicine recommendations on a physical piece of paper#i didn’t even get that after surgery with her how is that not below bare minimum#like this actually surprised me. jesus christ
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danielnelsen · 1 month
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things aren’t going well with peach. while i think my dad’s very right to be concerned that she hasn’t eaten anything in nearly 60 hours (obviously i am too), im becoming increasingly concerned that she hasn’t slept at all in around 36 hours and prior to that she was under anaesthetic, which isn’t exactly restful, so it’s closer to 48 hrs
like dad took her back to the vet today and we’ve got injections for her painkillers now because she’s not eating, and also injections for fluids (because she doesn’t drink; she only gets water from her food), so the not eating is Bad but also kinda under management, but if she doesn’t sleep soon i’m extremely worried. dad was like ‘if she doesn’t eat by tomorrow afternoon we’ll take her back because the injections will run out’ but like. if she doesn’t sleep tonight we have GOT to take her back first thing in the morning so they can sedate her or something
#her pain doesn’t seem to be too bad now that she’s got pain relief so idk what’s stopping her from sleeping#she won’t even lie down unless i’m sitting next to her. she just sits there staring out the window#her pupils are also taking up her entire eyes and have been all day#that’ll be a side effect of the medication and maybe the lack of sleep? but it won’t be making her feel any better#she can probably barely see at this point#like imagine you’ve been awake for 2 days after surgery and you’re in a lot of pain and haven’t eaten since before surgery#and are also on strong painkillers. and you also have no idea what’s wrong with you or why everyone’s doing things that hurt you#bruh your brain would be COOKED. there’s no way she has any idea what’s going on rn but she’s clearly feeling terrible#personal#like i think she’ll be ok in the long-term but she’s gotta somehow get through all these immediate issues#last time something like this happened she stopped drinking and never started again#not eating or sleeping don’t have workarounds as simple as putting water in her food#it really doesn’t help that there’s so much other shit going on rn#i’m doing a whole bunch of stuff with my phone and computer that’s taking a lot of work#but also my sister’s going on a long overseas trip that she’s leaving for tomorrow#so the combo of dad and sister coming and going constantly and also like 6 random deliveries for tech stuff in the last 2 days—#has the dogs really wound up. so georgie’s been howling at absolutely everything#and it’s rainy so my clothes aren’t trying and they’re hanging on a rack hooked on the hallway door so the door can’t close#which puts one less door between my room and the dogs so they’re waking me up every time anything happens#and i sleep during the day so that’s ALL THE TIME. i’ve had like 8 hrs of sleep between the last two afternoons#my sister always has so much random life stuff she wants to talk about and was getting really annoyed that i wasn’t very receptive#like ‘im about to go away for 3 months’ sorry i know its a big thing but i can’t just reschedule peach’s medical emergency
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spooky-dice · 8 months
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“fhjy is not sad” some of us are lonely and in tuition deficit!!!!!!!!!!!!
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libidinous-weeb · 8 months
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no, i think i get it now
through no fault of his own, gojo was so busy becoming “the strongest” that he didn’t realize he wasn’t there for geto when geto needed it the most.
when geto said “are you gojo satoru because you’re the strongest? or are you the strongest because you’re gojo satoru?” he was intentially trying to hurt gojo. the context and the subtext is important.
gojo was BORN to be the strongest, whether he wanted to be or not. some people are born with blue eyes, some with brown. and some people are born the strongest. that’s what gojo’s strength is like to himself. it’s a part of him, but it’s not who he is. when he was friends with geto, they were close despite that fact. it’s one of the first times someone stood side by side with gojo and didn’t really care if he was the strongest or not.
throughout his life, everyone else hates gojo for something he didn’t ask for. something that he can’t change or give up but something that he was born as. they all stare at him like some kind of circus freak, either in disgust, or in awe.
and geto just says “it’s because you’re too strong.” but they BOTH know that’s a lie. what geto is actually saying is “i’ve decided that you aren’t gojo satoru, the person i’ve loved and lost and fought with side by side anymore. i’ve decided i don’t want you in my life anymore. i’m saying the words that hurt you the most, because i hate you.”
and gojo is angry because his best friend, someone he loves, has just decided to have nothing to do with gojo anymore. it was like a sudden break up because he didn’t give a reason. he gave his reason for leaving jujutsu society but not why he didn’t tell gojo any of it.
tldr: gojo is asking “why didn’t you rely on me? aren’t we friends? why did you choose to go through this all on your own? why didn’t you tell me anything? i thought we were friends!”
and geto is saying “i hate you, just like everyone else. you’re the strongest. you’re not my friend. you’re barely even human. you wouldn’t understand.”
and geto’s saying that because gojo was practicing and training and getting stronger and wasn’t there when geto needed him to be there. and it wasn’t gojo’s fault, he was doing what he was supposed to be doing. gojo wanted to be there but geto chose to shut him out
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odetolovers · 9 months
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it is absolutely wild the way i’ve allowed people to treat me
#every year i write an end of year recap i’ve been doing it since 2019#this year So much happened but one of the big things was breaking up with my ex#and it genuinely blows my mind how badly i was treated and the fact i stayed as long as i did#year and a half of clownery when i knew after 4 months i’d been sold a lie 😭#i feel so bad for past me because girlie you didnt deserve that!! nobody does!!!#it’s helped me sm in my current relationship because i know what it’s like to be the collateral for someone’s self hatred#it’s motivated me to heal and develop self esteem so i dont do that to my wonderful partner#they have really shown me what love is and let me tell you! it’s nothing i experienced with my ex!#mind blowing mind boggling i am never letting Anyone treat me that appallingly ever again#literally crazy i wish her a lot of healing and growth cos goddamn how are you terrified of being a bad person yet treat people like you#treated me. no wayyyy no way#i so believe in that thing of what people are most scared of they’re most likely to do#goddamn! 2023 man. wild time#valentina talks#i definitely made many a mistake which is why im not really like. Angry at her because i understand and i’ve had to change a lot and grow a#lot too. i think everyone just is perpetually making mistakes and growing and that’s okay. but it doesn’t mean the people you hurt need to#forgive you or think your actions were okay#just yeesh. i’m glad it’s over and i moved on
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seilon · 1 year
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kinda wild how you can have almost every aspect of your life deeply intertwined with someone else for years and then have all of that thrown in your face when that person decides none of it meant anything and, in fact, was toxic and purge-worthy
#hahahaha it’s been a bad day#and I am spiraling and all around not having a good time#I keep looking at the bulletin board in my room that used to make me so happy to look at because of all the good memories on it and the#reminder of there being people who care about me and now it just sorta. does the opposite#most of it just makes me feel. dread.#he’s in almost every picture and 80% of the people in the pictures in general I don’t talk to anymore for one reason or another#mostly people who just drifted away because I’m absolutely terrible at staying in touch with people#like not in a quirky way. like actually actively ruins relationships for no reason level bas#but some of them are people who purposefully don’t talk to me anymore#found out recently about one of these people. it’s someone I’d been friends with for like 15 years. purposefully blocked me#I believe because of whatever bullshit my ex has told her. she never asked me about anything so whatever she knows is#heavily biased and probably warped#because I don’t have anyone advocating for me. lol#even my close friends- the extremely few I have- are ‘neutral’ on it. which. im gonna be honest hurts me quite a bit. I have no one who#truly condemns him for the way he’s handled (lack thereof) all this and bolstered all my trust issues in the process and has made me#constantly critical of my own intentions because I can never trust that what I do or say is manipulative or ‘unhealthy’ anymore and I don’t#think I’m an all around good person on top of that because of my low empathy and all that and etc etc etc. it’s really fucked me up#but yeah anyway. yeah. they’re still on good terms with him more or less (though not as close as I am but that’s partly just due to me being#physically close rather than in another city). and it honestly hurts me that they could actively be centrists here#like I. just. really don’t trust anyone anymore. how the fuck could I#uh. anyway. im not sure if i want to take the board down all together or just take off almost all the photos on it#not sure what’s more depressing#cause they’re both pretty bad lol. almost all my major good memories from the past five years have included my ex so they’re basically all#tainted and unpleasant to look back on now. really just wasted five years of my life for this#another reason I’m constantly contemplating my own intentions these days is because I have a lot of thoughts and urges that I’d never do but#that are. related to purposefully hurting others or myself physically or emotionally or both. like. every part of me wants to deck my ex in#the face but obviously I’d never do that. but even just the compulsion feels like a justification of his narrative/view of me as a person#like haha maybe I am a shitty toxic abusive manipulative bastard. maybe I do just deserve to be alone where I can’t hurt or think about#hurting anyone. it’d definitely be better all-around if I didn’t fucking exist. burden lifted. but you know.#not sure how im like this but also egotistical and self centered but alas here we are. anyway I’ll delete this soon sorry
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blueish-bird · 1 year
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burnout is sapping my hyperfixation of creative energy, but not to worry! I’m still thinking about Aki and Angel an incredibly abnormal amount
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cross-d-a · 19 hours
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Tales from My Bookstore:
*thump thump thump!!!*
Me: *turns around and sees a tiny girl no more than 2 feet tall carrying a picture book*
Girl’s mother: Honey, why are you running?
Little girl: I’m trying to read!
Girl’s mother: It’s not safe to run around here, baby. You might run into someone if you aren’t looking.
Little girl: I’m not- Well! It’s fine! I’m not running into anyone!
Girl’s mother: You haven’t run into anyone yet! *pauses* Why do you need to run to read?
Little girl: Because it’s HARD!!
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sharkieboi · 2 months
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broke person life hack win! convinced my grandma to buy me a bookshelf for my birthday so that I don’t have to spend the money myself!
#shhh sharkie#she texted me to send me a gift card but then was so insistent on sending me a physical thing as well#and i’ve been putting off buying a bookshelf cause a) broke af and b) don’t have a car to transport one from a physical store#i made it work with the ikea thing but that’s all in all a lot of money to burn and i wouldn’t be able to afford doing that for a while#but all my books are just in this sad pyramid on the floor and i want them on my shelves dammit#and she asked! and i was like fuck it. you know what I really need that I can’t afford right now? a nice bookshelf.#I know she and my grandpa have plenty of money to spend and spending it on their grandkids is their favorite thing to do#fuck it. yeah nonna can you buy me a nice bookshelf for my new-ish apartment?#it will be arriving next week!#especially since I didn’t get any cards or gifts from my immediate family.#birthdays are always very depressing for me but it hurt a lot this year that i’m like finally in the best mental place i’ve been in a while#and i’m trying so much harder to keep connections with my family and friends and mostly succeeding!!!!!#but my parents didn’t even send me a card.#which they do every year. i know cause I keep them. i have a special folder and everything.#i think i’ve just fucked up our relationship to the point I can’t fix it and it makes me sad and so mad at myself.#they fucked it up first but if it was important to me i should have tried harder to fix it.#and even if it’s like. they did send something but i have a mail/package thief so i don’t know that they sent anything.#they’re going to assume me not texting them a thank you is me being ungrateful and bad at communicating#not that something didn’t get delivered#so I won’t know until I see them in person next and that would only be if they brought it up#AND if they bring it up it’s going to be in disappointment and anger yknow?#so anyway tldr if Nonna is willing to buy me a nice bookshelf for my birthday because i’m broke and asked nicely i’ll fucking take it#she’s the only one who asked if I wanted something for my birthday#and i’m trying to be better about accepting the help i’m offered#and asking for help with bigger and inconvenient things#thanks Nonna can’t wait for the shelves
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vote-loki · 3 months
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Didn’t get any sleep last night because I had a migraine and I was still awake when my wife got up for work, which is fine. Except they lost their wallet and I was trying to help look and offering suggestions to where it may be even though my head hurts so horribly bad and they just kept getting more frustrated, because they couldn’t find it, not with me, and being mean and now I’m upset
Like bro I haven’t slept all night after an eight hour shift and I’m in severe pain can you please be nice to me for five seconds while I’m trying to help you
#personal vent#I’m lowkey trying to convince my wife to go to therapy for anger issues because they’re genuinely very snippy and mean to me quite often#when they’re slightly annoyed at anything and it’s starting to become actually detrimental to me#like Saturday we had made plans to go to my grandmas and sit in my inflatable pool all day because it was hot and we were both off#but they forgot and instead played Minecraft all morning and at 2 when I finally convinced them to go over they spent the entire time we#were over there mad. they refused the shoes I was wearing despite burning their feet because they were so pissed off id asked for their help#using the airpump. they didn’t bring a swimsuit so they couldn’t sit with me at all#the shoes I was offering them were actually their shoes I was wearing and I said ‘you can have my shoes’ meaning the ones on my feet not#ones that I owned and they snapped ‘actually they’re my fucking shoes’ at me#they also get extremely mad if I tell them#that something they’re doing has hurt my feelings even if I’m bringing it up just to discuss because I’m trying to communicate healthily#with them and they get so defensive that I’m#not sure if I’m being overdramatic or if they’re genuinely being mean to me anymore#again this is painting our relationship in a really bad light but I have no one in my real life I can talk to about this stuff#and I genuinely think they just don’t know how to handle or process their anger and frustration at other things and I am often the nearest#person to them so it often gets taken out on me. but it’s really really not fair to me and I’m starting to get so burnt out by it#like go to fucking therapy and learn healthy ways to process your anger/take criticism on your actions or I’m gonna blow us both up#lol#also as I was typing these tags they called me and told me their wallet was in their bag. a place I suggested they look like ten times.#and a place they got very mad at me for suggesting. what if I screamed.
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void-tiger · 4 months
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Still trying to come to terms with the intensity of how much I miss you just. Doesn’t make sense. At all. Feels like a bone break in my chest that I’m gritting my teeth through and still trying to keep myself distracted.
…right. July.
Except it’s still going to be someplace that has me on-edge at best. And I still just don’t get it with you not coming here if you seem so happy to see or hear from me.
Guess I’ll see how things really are in July. But if you’re worried about unequal reciprocation…c’mon. This one is. Just. Why not?? Once a month, once every two months? On your own or with your family? Or…y’all invite us over on an evening or something? I digress…
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