#* call: 004-young forever.

[valorums]

YOUR MUSE’S MANY LAYERS

respond to the prompts with your muse in mind.

LAYER    001    :    THE    OUTSIDE.  

* NAME:   Shi’al Finis Valorum

* EYE COLOUR: Cerulean Blue

* HAIR STYLE  /  COLOUR:  Curls of golden sunshine that cascade in a waterfall down her back, extending beyond her shoulders.

* HEIGHT:   5′3″

* CLOTHING STYLE: During the twilight of the republic, Shi’al favors elegant attire with pastel color palettes and floral imagery. When Shi’al becomes PRESS SECRETARY, as mentioned in previous posts, her wardrobe mirrors Sidious’s own; she only dons black or red attire from the point of Order Sixty-Six onward.

* BEST PHYSICAL FEATURE:   A piercing gaze of cerulean blue, simultaneously so full of life that she becomes forever young and so haunted that one could easily ascertain that she has already lived a thousand lifetimes.

LAYER    002    :    THE    INSIDE.

* FEARS: Shi’al’s fears are numerous, but above all else reigns LONELINESS. Growing up in the world of the fine arts, where she told fairytales through ballet and opera, had a PROFOUND EFFECT on her psyche that resulted in the manifestation of this fear as an immense anxiety that she will never find true love. She knows that the fear is childish and she knows that romantic love isn’t the only form of love, but this fear still eats away at her for many years prior to the rise of the Empire.

* GUILTY PLEASURE:  Gossip. Shi’al is aware of the potential of gossip to be mean-spirited and cruel; however, she cannot help but keep her eyes and ears peeled for the latest gossip amongst the Coruscant elite. Eventually, her peers recognize her as someone who knows everything about everyone — if there’s something happening, she knows the full breadth of the situation. This is naturally a godsend during the Galactic Empire’s cutthroat rule, where it becomes every man for himself.

* BIGGEST PET PEEVE: False promises. If you make a promise to her, keep it.

* AMBITIONS FOR THE FUTURE: Prior to the rise of the Empire, Shi’al desperately wishes to achieve the EQUALITY and ABOLITION of enslavement that she has been working towards her whole life. However, after she defects from the Empire, she’ll settle for PEACE.

LAYER    003    :    THOUGHTS.

* FIRST THOUGHTS WAKING UP: The day ahead. Shi’al is a busy woman, and she must remain constantly aware of WHAT IS NEXT.

* WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT MOST:  Although much occupies her crowded thoughts, they are nevertheless dominated by DAYDREAMS. Sometimes, she is so swept up in the throes of a daydream that it seems as though she is in another world entirely. When she is not daydreaming, THE ARTS occupy her mind.

* WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT BEFORE BED: If she is not caught in the grasp of daydreams, then she will either review the day’s events — or ponder what lies ahead in her future.

* WHAT THEY THINK THEIR BEST QUALITY IS: She’s not sure.

LAYER    004    :    WHAT’S    BETTER?

* SINGLE OR GROUP DATES:   Single Dates — it’s a better way to get to know prospective partners.

* TO BE LOVED OR RESPECTED: Loved, because it is from love that respect can be borne.

* BEAUTY OR BRAINS:  Brains. Although Shi’al considers herself a connaisseur of beautiful souls, she is also aware that aesthetic appearance isn’t everything. More often than not, there is more to someone than the facade that they don in public. Nothing is as it seems.

* DOGS OR CATS: How dare you make her suffer from having to do such an impossible choice?

LAYER    005    :    DO    THEY…

* LIE:    House Valorum is a political powerhouse whose legacy stretches back a thousand years, and she grew up calling politicians her closest acquaintances. When this is coupled with the reality that she must LIE TO SURVIVE as a double agent for the Rebel Alliance, of course she lies.

* BELIEVE IN THEMSELVES:   It is complicated, for confidence is something that she falsely projects yet struggles to maintain.

* BELIEVE IN LOVE:   How could one such as herself not believe in love, when their very career consists of performing fairytales every night for a live audience? Shi’al is a wholehearted believer in true love, and she is also a gentle soul who loves most everyone she meets. After all, only a soul such as this would be able to forgive Darth Tyranus for his brutal torture. In her eyes, everyone deserves compassion and everyone is worthy of experiencing love.

* WANT SOMEONE: She has always yearned for a KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR to sweep her off her feet and give her a romance straight from the pages of a fairytale, so perhaps, the answer is yes.

LAYER    006    :    HAVE    THEY    EVER…

* BEEN ON STAGE:   As a BALLET DANCER and OPERA STAR, she will often joke that her entire life has been spent on stage. Thus, she has indeed been on stage, and considers the Coruscant Opera House a second home.

* CHANGED WHO THEY WERE TO FIT IN:  It was an UNFORTUNATE NECESSITY to survive in the political scene of the empire. If she had remained who she was before Emperor Palpatine’s reign, the vultures that she called her colleagues would’ve eaten her alive.

LAYER    007    :    FAVORITES.

* FAVOURITE COLOUR:  Blush Pink, Gold, Lavender, Crimson Red, Silver

* FAVOURITE ANIMAL:   Dove

* FAVOURITE BOOK:   Assuming that our world’s literature exists in the Star Wars universe, Shi’al would answer either Shakespeare’s Macbeth or Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice if asked this question.

* FAVOURITE GAME: Chess.

LAYER    008    :    AGE.

* DAY THEIR NEXT BIRTHDAY WILL BE:  May Sixteenth.

* HOW OLD WILL THEY BE:   Universe and Timeline Dependent.

LAYER    009  :   FINISH    THE    SENTENCE.

* I LOVE: Life itself. There are so many beautiful things to experience in our galaxy, don’t you think?

* I FEEL: Hunted. Every single day, the enemies that I have made are hunting me down, plotting somewhere to end my life. There is never a moment’s peace; I must always look over my shoulder to make sure that I am safe. This is the life I must lead — the only way to escape it is to be silent, and I must not ever allow myself to be SILENCED. Silence is compliance with oppression. I abhor oppression.

* I HIDE: Bitter envy of the romances that others experience. Envy does nothing but DESTROY, and I want to BUILD OTHERS UP rather than TEAR THEM DOWN. Still, it eats away at my heart. Sometimes, I must also hide just how POWERLESS I feel to enact meaningful change.

* I MISS: Blissful ignorance. If only I could go back in time to the wonderful days before I knew that my godfather was a MONSTER.

* I WISH: for freedom. I don’t want to be a puppet anymore — it makes me feel trapped.

TAGGED BY no one.

TAGGING @misfittcd (Lahani), @nieithryn (Calista), @k4ssa (Cassian), @stars-written (Nil-Rae), @frxncaise (Angélique), @wornkindness (Amelia), @mayxthexforce (Rajeev), @unwaivering (Seth), @vendettavalor (Aurelia), @divinehr (Priscilla), AND YOU.

[lukef]

〄☾— young forever

⌖ @kadeuxhyeonju​

the sun was starting to set when luke left work and begun his way home through the hearts territory. half of the sun was already hidden behind the horizon, but only the most residual trails of light peaked through the roofs and houses. it seemed to become a night full of stars. some patches of grey clouds covered the sky here and there, hiding the orangey and slightly violett tones - but he knew the faction would provide the light nature would keep for herself later that day through bars, clubs and the likes. even though the day would soon come to an end, the streets weren’t quiet at all. the contrary was happening, all movements seemed to concentrate outside of the buildings, not even pulling a line between those who were running errands and those who party. and between all those people, bars and clubs, one particular shop seemed to pull his interest. 

the vega gem, he had often passed the jewelry but never entered, not due to the lack of money, but rather because of the faction the shop was located in. luke stopped his bay dun, moucha, on the sidewalk and got off her back, before tying her cord at the intended ferrule on the wall of a house. “i’ll be right back.” he said, as if the horse could understand what he was saying. he crossed the street, removed a bit of dust from his work uniform and checked out the display windows for a few seconds. when he finally entered the jewelry, he was greeted by both silence and an elegant interior, something you would expect from the jewelry owned by a highranker, probably a facecard. the owner was nowhere to be seen, so he simply spent some time in front of the showcases, inspecting the jewelry displayed inside. a few of the things sparked his interest. fully lost in thought, the elementalist didn’t hear the approaching footsteps of the owner, only looking up when he sensed his figure in the corner of his eye.

he felt as if a wall made out of fire hit him, a wall of fire that sent sparks down his whole body. the sparks didn’t stop until they reached his toes - and they brought immediate nervousness over him. luke stopped right in his tracks. the face he looked into was a face he hadn’t seen in a few years, or rather decades. a face he could never forget - and it belonged to lee hyeonju. memories flooded his brain for a few seconds, memories of ivy and juju, sitting on a bench, laughing about a way younger luke. a way younger luke who was not so much in control of his powers, a younger luke who often burned down things and later on burned down plants, and someday ivy which wrapped around lanterns, ( he still heard ivy say ”not that you burn me down one day, lukey! be careful with those hot hands of yours!” ) before he finally burned down friendships. the second wave of memories hit him right after. and most of them were not happy at all. they contained shocked faces of parents, students; they contained tears and pain. and even though he had coped through the years, a wound was ripped open the second he opened his mouth.

“hyeonju. how have you been?”

[zodiacmac]

diamond in the rough | a tomgreg spotify mix.

a mix about longing for the wrong person and wanting to be more important to that person than you should ever be allowed to be. 

link within the title. tracklist and lyric selections below. 

001. hot & heavy | lucy dacus.

how could i deny a diamond in the rough? you let me in your world until you had enough. you knew that i wanted you to bend the rules. how did i believe i had a hold on you? you were always stronger than people suspected - underestimated and overprotected. 

002. solider heart | mara connor.

because in this life, i can see the years wearing in your eyes, like a tired tree that wilts under the moon. and you’re a sorry someone who takes a lover in your stride, bends and breaks them to suit your mood til you’re no longer satisfied. but i don’t need to fall apart - i’m the owner of a soldier heart. 

003. sick of spiraling | bachelor, jay som, palehound.

i thought, “if i can’t have my own back, how the fuck can i have your’s?” you are a braving light in a world so dark, and i’m sick of spiraling, and i need your touch to stop. 

004. romantic | mannequin pussy.

i get along with everyone i meet - i’m so sweet. you’re in a bad mood. every time you wake up with the bees. stop taking this shit out on me. 

005. and more | tanukichan.

you can call me if you want to, but there’s a price to pay. you can read into my silence better than the words i say. 

006. why do i always feel this way | pale honey. 

through the heaviest storms, i know i can carry the weight of your world if only you’d let me. was it all for her? then what about me? i will never learn - i can never compete. 

007. ben franklin | snail mail. 

live on, but nothing feels true. sometimes i hate her just for not being you. 

008. young enough | charly bliss.

i can’t protect you now if i couldn’t save you then. you were still just a kid - you’re a beautiful boy. 

009. 2 cool 2 care | anna burch.

from what i can see, reciprocity is boring, but i’m tired of unrequited love stories. you scare me with your indifference - i like you best when you’re a mess. 

010. conditions | squirrel flower. 

keep you guessing, i swear i won’t tell you. make you want me and then i’ll desert you. but it’s alright because you said you don’t need me. it’s alright because i kept it steady. don’t look at me like that, like you’ll kill me. i can outrun you and i’ll do it gracefully. 

011. soft stud | black belt eagle squad.

wondering if you want me. i know you’re taken. need you, want you. i know you’re taken. 

012. forever | pom pom squad.

it’s not my fault you think about me every time that you’re with her. why do you push me away when i know you wanna touch me? you’re only kidding yourself when you say that you don’t love me. 

013. power | katie von schleicher. 

i’m afraid she’s the other one you made. she has tremendous power. i want it - can i have it? do i have it yet?

014. red shoulder | squirrel flower. 

take. hit harder. feeling more. i don’t know what it is or isn’t anymore. you’re one for healing, but i’m still reeling from your last call.  

015. all this love | destroy boys. 

i want it so bad - all those things i used to have, but it was never quite right. all this love i have to give - no one wants to take it. i’m doing too much. 

016. laying on my floor | adult mom. 

and my dad says, “why do you always fight for love that always bites?” he only loved me when i looked away - my neck hurts from keeping it that way. 

017. point of no return | lola kirke.

you always know just what to feed me - just enough to keep me wanting more, more, more. i spend my time planting seeds of love for you to walk on. that’s why they don’t grow, grow, grow. 

018. i know it’s wrong | hurray for the riff raff. 

well, i take you out like i did before. i send you right to the nearest liquor store, and i tell you one thing [that] always made some sense: it’s never wrong to hop a fence. well, i know it’s wrong, but it feels right if i love you, babe, for all my life.  

019. trouble was for | thao. 

everybody needs sugar from your mouth - but i’ll take none for me. i was late - you’ve run out. come back, come back, because i got smart in the time it took to get this far. a fight so old, this body complains. i come back because the punches always hit the same. 

020. i bet you think about me | taylor swift.

now you’re out in the world, searching for your soul, scared not to be hip, scared to get old, chasing make-believe status. last time you felt free was when none of that shit mattered because you were with me.

021. honey | drugdealer and weyes blood. 

i know that you want to be seen and to be heard. oh, to be loved - it’s not a crime. money is the root of the game - what you stand to gain, but everybody’s gonna lose their heads. 

022. fourth of july | cold war kids. 

why’d you think i’m special if i’m only selfish? i’ll never forget what you gave up for me. what makes me so special? you think that i’m selfish. i’ll never forget what you gave up for me.

023. the adults are talking | the strokes.

don’t go there because you’ll never return. i know you think of me when you think of her, but then it don’t make sense when you’re trying hard to do the right thing (but without recompense). and then you did something wrong and you said it was great - and now you don’t know how you could ever complain.

024. diplomat’s son | vampire weekend.

it’s not right, but it’s now or never, and if i wait, could i ever forgive myself? if i ever had a chance, it’s now, then, but i never had the feeling i could offer that to you. to offer it to you would be cruel when all i want to do is use you.

[develation]

SCP AU

So @emeraldtrainer1 (Ao3), @writingforfunandbecauseboredom (Ao3), and DarkstarWolf53 (<-Dunno if they have Tumblr) did an SCP AU three-way Convo fic some months ago. I really enjoyed the outline and concept and asked if I could expand on it. With their permission and about a month of research into what the actual SCP Foundation is (and holy cow there is so much, no wonder people are all over this) I've finally managed to get a start on this. There is a decent amount of things that are different from their original Convo (via their permission) but it will basically follow the same storyline that they created. Please go check their Convo out, it's a very long and fun read with a lot of good fluff and Angst mixed in.

I will hopefully be drawing some of my designs soon but for now, writing seems to be the way to go. Here is a link to it on Ao3 -> https://archiveofourown.org/works/33213928/chapters/82464553

I'll also have it below in case you would like to read it on Tumblr instead.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Error: (The End Of All But Me.) There are too many unworldly traits that spiders have that I couldn't just not give to Error, so I've kind of combined their Puppetmaster concept to my design. He has 4 arms with clawed fingertips, his tail is prehensile and his jaw can split open. He has 5 tongues still, 2 of them are spear-like, and can shoot out and impale victims. The saliva produced under the tips of the barbs on the two tongues can liquidity a prey items insides so he can drink them up (still a clean freak, using the skin as a cup and drinking up any mess leaving a skin bag behind). His other three tongues are prehensile and can extend to an unknown length, they are barbed aswell but do not carry the venomous saliva. Strings wrap along his bones from his eye sockets, which he uses to create a nest atop the ceiling of his cell.

SCP-002's (Apollyon class) cell is a blank room (it ask for a TV later on) that goes up vertically 2 floors. The top half is required to be shrouded in darkness as it likes voids of either white or black. It has filled the darkness of its cell with a nest of strings that it spends all of its time in, even when feeding. It does not attempt to attack staff, when asked why it replied with, "Not yet." Personal have not been able to decipher what it means by that statement. In an interview via speakers and mics within containment cell, it was asked why SCP-002 stares off at seemingly nothing for extended periods of time and never touches the ground. Subject responded with, "Busy." When asked what it was busy doing- "Watching." When asked what it was watching- "The world. Everything." Due to this experience, it can be concluded that 002 can view any place in the world and perhaps beyond via "screens". These "screens" are unviewable to anyone but 002 and 001 as the latter SCP had called them so, hence their given name. SCP-002 has a strange relationship with SCP-001 and it can not be determined if 002 likes or dislikes 001.

Ink created Error on accident. In the beginning, Ink didn't know what he was doing, and the brutality of Earth's natural forces of destruction were uncontrollable. If he wanted to bring life to his chosen planet he needed a way to control the chaos. And so through the storm, a new force was born. And even if Ink didn't create it, he did wish for it.

Error is a ticking time bomb for extinction. He waits and watches until he decides it's time for a "spring cleaning" and starts his work. The Ordovician, Late Devonian, Permian, Triassic, and Cretaceous mass extinctions were all him. He deemed the human race ready for a "cleaning" a long time ago and Ink agreed with him, ready to see and make something new. But Nightmare threatened the both of them by stating that he would make the earth forever inhabitable and they would have to kill him before he stoped his rage. Nightmare fears that if another extinction event were to occur he'd lose his boys.

Ink: (God doesn't care about what's right or what's wrong. God just wants to watch interesting things happen.) His form is always changing, different traits from different animals and organisms he's created. Ink is basically Gaia. Born when Theia crashed into Earth around 4.5 billion years ago, he made everything that ever existed. Since he's made A LOT of organisms he has a ton of favorites and the traits from them are what mostly show up when he mutates. Sometimes it's Kaprosuchus with belonged snout and fangs. Sometimes it's Tylosaurus with its marine reptilian posterior. Sometimes it's Chital Deer and their antlers. More often than not though, his tail has consistently stated having bristle-like hair at the tip of it, which is basically his brush. The concept of paintbrushes is pretty new to him since the human race has been around for a short time compared to other species, so while he does have one, his tail is his broomie. If his next from doesn't have it then he just uses his hands and his blood.

Ink can't be contained. It's that simple, he just can't. He just sticks around because it's interesting and hilarious to see his creations so intelligent but so stupid. (remember how humans are still young in terms of Earth's age, so the fact that they're so smart... on a thought level that could almost match his own is so very interesting to see and watch. even if there ruining his planet.) The SCP foundation just has to let him do his thing and hope that he doesn't override 003's and 004's decision to not have an extinction event.

His cell is basically a mini-ecosystem, with all of his favorite organisms living within whether they are extinct or not. He loves his little sample of the world and it keeps him in his cell for a good amount of time so the foundation let him have it. If any of them even touch what is HIS without permission then he rips them apart and feeds them to the baby Rhamphorhynchus. Don't touch his babies.

...Cross though... he can touch his babies... and Dream... and maybe Error... That's it though!

SCP-001 (Apollyon Class) is a being older than all living things, despite his toddler-like mannerisms. Even more infuriating, within an interview, 001 openly admitted to being the cause of all SCP's and their anomalous effects. It stated that they were all just mistakes and/or experiments, testing the limits of their own abilities. 001's quoted response- "You don't get it do you? I made everything here! All of your little "SCP's" are just of my creation as all of you. Sure there all mistakes but, it just proves my point that it's time to start over again. A clean slate y'know? Pfft- wow you look mad! If it makes you feel any better, I don't like most of them either. They were cool at first but... it's like flicking black paint over a finished painting. Sure, you can try to get over it but eventually, it will just bother you so much that you just can't stand it! Well... I do kinda want some of them to stay... If I could just convince Ru..." -shows evidence to this conclusion. Termination trials were approved by the 05 Council, though have not been able to start since 001's creation of a barrier around its cell, preventing entry of anything that tries to pass.

[Note: Error, Dream, and Nightmare are not included in what Ink views as "mistakes". Y'know when you're trying something new and you don't know what you’re doing, yet it works somehow. That's them, happy accidents. Ink adores them.]

Ink finds the attempt of Termination trials on him to be absolutely hilarious. The fact that humanity's insecurity about their lifespan and control is so great that they'd try to KILL HIM. Amazing. He can't believe he's managed to make the simultaneously best and worst organism ever.

Dream: (When day breaks.)  Again he was accidentally created by Ink’s actions in an intense solar storm. The flare drifting over the earth in combination with Ink’s magic still working to bring life brought him to existence. Dream’s design is almost harpy-like, with beautiful golden, sun-like wings with a small feathery crest atop his skull. Two tail-like feathers sprout from the crest that can rise up and down depending on expression and mood. He also has bird feet and legs, and a tail.

Dream adores all life, his is the warmth and growth of the sun (original form being a ball of light and plasma that literally looks like a mini sun). He is basically like a piece of the sun on earth. His cell is kinda like Ink’s, only in the fact that there are just a couple of animal species. Some deer, birds, and insects mainly. Ink obviously just appeared in his cell one day and made it for him. While Dream could be considered to be a Safe SCP, his ability to damage or completely ruin the planet if inraged prevents that classification.

SCP-003 (Apollyon Class) has proven to be a relatively docile creature. It is elegant in nature (like that of a bird) and shows greater empathy towards all life in general. Unlike SCP’s 001, 002, and 004 who view it as more interesting and admirable, more like a pretty crystal than an actual being with its own consciousness. 003 can not be fully contained and has shown the ability to travel through light rays. Its aura has also shown to be some form of anesthesia, and exposure for prolonged periods causes victims to feel more at peace and calm. 003 does have the capability to travel through the “dreamscape”, what exactly that in tails is unknown.

Dream doesn’t agree with the extinction event thing because the Holocene period hasn’t lasted for nearly as long as it should. On the other hand, he does distaste humanity/monsterkind for all it has done to the planet. Even so, he feels like they deserve more of a chance.

Nightmare: (Does the Black Moon howl?)(Death) Complete with the theme of being Dreams opposite, Nightmare was born from a black moon and the combination of Ink’s magic bringing life to the earth. He isn’t an evil force or anything, just the night to the day. His design is pretty true to OG nightmare, although his legs and feet share the same digitigrade format. His tentacles are more ghostly than slimy and they drip upwards instead of towards the ground. His bones also have a ghost;y wisp to them, but it isn’t that noticeable. Instead of only having a turquoise glint in his magic, there are sparks of purple aswell. (His original form being a black sphere of what looks like smoke).

His cell is basically an entrance to a cave system that Ink had made for him. Inside is a galaxy of crystals and gemstones that glow and sparkle like the night sky. A small stream runs through, the light refracting off of the water, adding to the glow effect. It is a nice calm place for Nightmare to just chill in, his separate own little world.

Nightmare is kind of mysterious, in the realm of Error in which he likes to watch things happen. Just lurking in the shadows, a quiet observer. Though, he wasn’t as fascinated by life as the others. So to prevent his boredom Ink made him a present- Killer. Nightmare hated the little thing at first but it didn’t take too long to grow fond of the little guy. Not too long later Ink pronounced his joy in watching Nightmare sigh in frustration by sending 2 more bundles his way -Dust and Horror- and Nightmare had to threaten Ink to stop before any more joined the fray.

SCP-004 (Apollyon Class) is an entity whose intentions are completely unknown. A mysterious being that chooses to dwell in the cave system 001 made for it. The entity refuses to interact with personal unless in interview. And when it does respond, it does so in riddles and metaphors. It seemingly takes joy asking more questions than the interviewer, turning the conversation in its favor. On such question that has been repeated multiple times - “Does the Black Moon howl?” has puzzled personal. Though 004 states that if answered correctly and explained why, then it will share its secrets with that person and that person only.

004 proves to be uncontainable like its counterparts, able to travel through shadows. SCP’s 012, 032, and 024 seem to be “followers” of 004, and regularly go missing from their cells. Most likely 004’s doing.

[Ink created Killer, Dust, and Horror during the era where dinosaurs were still alive, so they have some traits from them.]

Killer: (War) Was created by Ink for Nightmare to keep him entertained. Killer was born as a baby in Ink’s very hands, a little skeleton with curved blades for hands and digitigrade legs and feet (and little quills on his back). Growing up under Nightmare’s care was an interesting experience, but he thought Kill’s everything he needed to know.

-[SCP-012, Keter]-

Killer is fast, very fast. And he enjoys killing things (what a surprise). He’s pretty much the same cocky boi as always. His more SCP side is that he doesn’t seem to ever feel pain and the black liquid that leaks through his eyes. That can be used as a type of venomous toxin to whatever he pleases.

Dust: (Pestilence) You know Epidexipteryx and Therizinosaurus? Those are Dust hands, long with even longer claws. He can also turn into literal dust, more of a phantom or wraith in nature. He can walk through walls, and turn others to dust and grow himself if he wishes.

He and Horror could be twins since Ink made them both at the same time. Holding his little creations in his arms as they wriggled and whined in confusion at suddenly being alive.

-[SCP-032, Keter]-

Dust is pretty quiet and tame. He has his episodes but he stays pretty much the same as bookwrym’s, writing’s, and Dark’s Dust.

Horror: (Famine) Since Horror is a vent crawler I based his design on that. Horror’s second set of arms are like a praying mantis with an extra joint, hands serrated blades almost like Killer’s. He used to sit in trees and wait for prey to walk underneath him, plucking them from the ground with his long arms and eating them alive.

Same thing when in vents, just waits over the openings and plucks a person off of the ground and into the vent (if personal don’t keep up with his feeding times)

-[SCP-024, Euclid]-

Other than his design Horror is pretty much the same as bookwyrm’s, writing’s, and Dark’s concept.

Outer: [SCP-044, Safe] His stardust makes him have luminescent galaxy and star patterns on his bones. He floats regularly without control over it and can sometimes make other objects float, in rare cases people, aswell. Ink made him a jacket where pieces of its hood and aglets float off like a sort of fluffy foam. The pieces orbit him like planets to a star before joining back, making a continuous cycle.

(And yes writingforFUN, he will still keep his anime sparkling eyelight’s).

Cross: [SCP-00X, Thaumiel] Was created by Dr. X to help contain and terminate Keter SCP’s. Being forced to kill his brother when he turned Keter, not completely in control of his actions. Dr. X’s “programing” making him see his brother no longer as such, just an object to be eliminated. When Cross became uncontrollable Dr. X put wiped his memory without the 05’s or administers permission and an MTF was sent after him that came back empty-handed. Cross was brought back soon enough and had his memory wiped.

They bring him back in as a staff member and that’s when the story kicks off, mostly following bookwyrm’s, writingforFUN, and Dark’s original outline/convo.

(I apologize for any typos)

[southernrays]

location: Fairvale + Jesup/Atlanta in flashbacks date: The second week of July 2020 + Ray’s entire life availability: closed solo tldr: Ray ponders his love life before-during-after the apocalypse cw for: transphobia, disclosure talks, transitioning, divorce, drugs (mentioned not used) and all of the general heart break affiliated with young love.

000.

Ray fell in love too easily.

It had always been a problem, really, but there was no real fix. Ray loved deeply, easily, and with his whole entire heart. He had done so since he was a kid, and he would probably always do so, apocalypse or not.

001.

His first crush had been on Brittany Walker when he was six years old. That was before he was Ray, before he was even Nate, but a crush was a crush.

Brittany was the most popular girl in their elementary school. Jesup was a small town that only grew smaller the older they got, and Ray was one of ten in his class. Brittany was classically pretty - blonde hair, blue eyes, a big smile, and kind eyes - but Ray knew it was more that that. He didn’t want to be Brittany’s friend, he wanted to be her best friend, and got jealous of everyone else. When the town got a new set of siblings, brother and sister, and Brittany started hanging out with them instead of him, Ray’s father noticed the frowns and sad looks at the dinner table.

“What’s wrong, champ?” David had asked, the nickname sticking from a t-ball championship streak of two years. Ray had pouted over the okra on his plate, and not just because it was slimy.

“Brittany has new friends and likes them better. But I like her more than anyone else on the playground.”

“Is that right now?” David had amusement in his eyes when he tried to keep a straight face, and Ray was old enough to see it. He was deceptively perceptive for his age and already a good people watcher at the bar. David knew that.

“I’m serious Dad. I’d marry her, like you and mom.”

Ray was still just six, though. He didn’t notice the tense of his father’s shoulder, the way he glanced over to make sure that his wife wasn’t in the room. He didn’t notice the frown lines on his face or how unhappy he had been for the last six years. He didn’t know that the divorce papers will be signed before their next Christmas, and it will be spent without Regina Turner. That all of his birthdays and holidays and life events would be without her, forever, very soon.

“That’s a whole lot of like, kiddo.”

“I mean it, Pa.”

“That’s alright champ. You can marry whoever you want to when you get older, alright? I’ll love you no matter what.”

“Alright dad,” little Ray had said with a wrinkle of his nose. “Don’t make it weird.”

David’s laugh had filled the kitchen, and Ray felt better about it all.

002.

Ray didn’t have a type growing up. The people he liked, he liked individually, not because they fit into a mold that checked off imaginary boxes. In high school his eyes turned towards a new girl in town that’s aesthetic screams southern gothic in an unironic way. Hailee wore her eye liner too thick, kept her music too loud, wore too much black and metal, and glared at everyone at Jesup’s only high school like their mere presence bothered her. Ray had no idea, in retrospect, why he was drawn to her, but he was. Ray was finally Nate by then, finally himself in his own skin and his own clothing and no one could take that from him. Not the busybodies of Jesup, not his mother’s stinging palm on his cheek, and not any pastor of a Church he wasn’t apart of, praying to a man he didn’t believe in. 

Ray was unapologetically himself, and maybe he was drawn to someone else like that, too.

Hailee avoided him like the plague, too, at first. She scoffed at his worn levis and dirty cowboy boots. She ignored Ray when the popular crowd stopped by his locker. Ray was popular, too, in spite of his transition and small town gossip. His father owned one of the only bars in town that made him cool, and a source of liquor for unage drinking and parties. Ray didn’t care much for that, but he did appreciate the socialization of it all.

“Hey, Hailee, wait up now,” Ray had called out, almost not recognizing his own voice after his second puberty. 

“What do you want, Nate?” Her eyes had narrowed, pretty and green despite the kohl surrounding them. 

“You to come to Nick’s party this weekend. What do ya say?” Ray rocked back on his heels, nervous of her answer. People in the hallway stopped to look at them, and Ray wondered what they saw. Was it the stubble on his chin, his recent growth spike, and the new squareness of his hips? Or was it the same kid that had been there since pre-school, unable to leave that old, uncomfortable skin behind.

“I’ll think about it.”

“Yeah? You do that, then. I can pick ya up on the bike if you want?” 

Her eyes flashed with something dangerous, then, and Ray knew he had hooked her. What kind of edgy girl could resist showing up to the party on the back of a sick motorcycle?

They find themselves in a closet, of all places, in the middle of the night. Ray tasted tequila on her lips when she slotted their hips together. He pushed back, pinning her against a wall as he slipped his tongue into her mouth. The groan she let out was sweet music to his ears and she melted like putty against his strong frame.

“Worth comin’ out for the party?” Ray asked against her lips. She bit his lip in retaliation before deepening the kiss. Ray’s hands wandered, fingers trailing the skin exposed by the black crop top she had decided to wear tonight. They separate when Ray needed to come up for air, harsh pants filling the small spaces of the closet.

“I didn’t expect it to be so good,” Hailee mumbled against his lips, and Ray can’t help but freeze.

“What? Kissin’ a redneck?” He tried to joke off, desperate for her to make some small town hick joke. Because Hailee was from Indianapolis. She was supposed to be edgy and alternative and beyond all of the small town gossip. She was different from the other people Ray had been taking hayrides with since the days of diapers. 

He expected more out of Hailee - maybe more than he should have, maybe more than what was fair - which is why the disappointment felt so much worse with her.

“No, you know...” A brief pause of hesitation and Ray prayed, dear God for her to say anything but what he thought she was going to say. “Kissing someone like you.”

Ray flinched back like someone had dropped a bucket of ice on him. His eyes sting for a brief second of embarrassment before the rage took over. He takes one deep breath, and then another. Man, testosterone was a potent thing, wasn’t it?

“I... I’ll see ya ‘round Hailey.”

“Wait - Nate - I didn’t ... I wasn’t trying to-”

Ray doesn’t hear the rest. He doesn’t need to.

003.

Dating Xavier was a mistake, plain and simple.

Ray was new to the area. He was finally free of his town, free of the stigma and the knowing looks, and the everything else that came with a town so small it felt like a fishbowl. Here, in Atlanta, he got to start over. He could be Nate from the beginning, without any need to pretend otherwise.

And Nate was a useless bisexual. Always had been.

Xavier was kind of a douchebag. He met Ray at a bar, of course, his band playing on the makeshift stage. Xavier was a drummer. He was so dang pretty, easy on the eyes, and kissed in a dirty, grungy sort of way that had it’s charms. He was nothing like Jesup kids; Xavier was spoiled, wild, a city boy through and through, and Ray craved the simplicity of it all.

Xavier (who went by X) was not a good guy and did drugs (most X) and got crossfaded out of his mind after shows. He stayed up crazy hours, usually high, and wrote all sorts of lyrics for his band. Their relationship, if you could call it that, was very brief and mostly physical.

“You should play guitar, babe, like for real, you know?” Xavier said, waking Ray up at five in the morning to tell him that.

“Why’s that, handsome?” Ray had answered, sleep still clogging his voice as he rolled over. It looked like X hadn’t been to sleep yet, which made sense considering the binge he had been on.

“It’d make you more edgy, right, like, you’d be hotter. Everyone’s hotter if they play guitar.”

“S’that why you’re a drummer?” Ray teased, but the fun nature of it went over Xavier’s head. He leveled a big scowl at Ray, and Ray sighed.

“No need to be mean, Nate.”

“Was just a joke, baby.” Ray opened up the covers of the bed, glancing at the clock again. Xavier’s pupils were so dilated that he couldn’t see his pretty brown eyes. “Come to bed soon?”

“You know I have to finish this song. We hit the road in three weeks for our tour.”

In that three weeks, Ray picked up a guitar and had his first lessons, broke up with Xavier, and never saw the guy again.

He was not more edgy, not in the slightest, but he did have a new guitar and a whole city to explore.

004.

Meeting Luci had been accidental in every way. He had picked up an extra shift at the bar that his manager forgot to write into the schedule, so when he showed up for it there was double staffing and no need for Ray to be there. Instead of spending a Friday night alone, at his apartment, he decided to stay. Ray nursed a couple of beers as the bar filled up and texted his friends to show up early.

The Drunken Crown was a sort of themed bar-slash-pub in Atlanta. It was smaller, which Ray appreciated, and had theme nights on the daily. A lot of the college kids from nearby spent their time there, and the average patron was generally on the younger side. On Fridays and Saturdays their theme rotated, and tonight’s was Historic Night. 

His friends arrived a bit later, dressed in Spartan battle gear. They did a couple rounds of shots before most of them took to the dance floor, leaving Ray laughing as he refused at the bar.

Ray had come dressed in an honest to goodness toga, including a gold spray-painted leaf crown and golden accessories. His time in the gym had definitely paid off as he was finally bulking up and gaining more definition in his shoulders. One or two girls had been orbiting around him, but Ray didn’t make any passes at anyone. He sipped on his beer, watching his coworkers make their rounds, and decided to people watch for the evening.

A group of flappers were tearing up the dance floor. Ray could see his buddy, Blake, drunkenly approaching them and attempting some dance moves that made him look ridiculous. Some guys in three piece suits were making out by the entrance. A group of hippies were eagerly chatting and mingling at the bar. Ray saw at least three girls who looked like some extras in a Nirvana video begging for some kind of song change from whatever was on the speakers.

Luci had been dressed up as an old writer, someone Ray knew the name of but couldn’t remember, not truly and definitely not any more, and kept all to herself in the very corner of the bar. She was sipping on some mixed drink and Ray’s eyes stopped on her. What was her story? The quiet girl, alone at the bar, barely hanging onto the fringes of all of the activity. 

He was intrigued, and he wanted to know.

A simple introduction was given. Ray prodded, trying to get a feel for the quiet girl, who opened up immediately when asked about her costume. Ray was no academic, but he appreciated the passion in her eyes when she spoke about something, voice louder than either one of them expected.

“I’m Nate, by the way. It’s nice to meet you.”

And it was. Luci was his opposite in so many ways. He hadn’t expected to see her again after that night, too shy to ask for her number and unsure if she was interested in giving it. His coworkers had given him hell for chickening out, and Ray just gave them a good-natured smile.

A week and a half later, Luci came in, dressed normally, while Ray was working. He spent the entire night neglecting his duties, trying to get a conversation out of her and working his own natural charm. And she came back the next week, and the week after, too. Soon Ray was brave enough to ask for her number. And she gave it to him.

Being with Luci was different. Their first date, Ray had taken her out of the city to a local dirt track. They went mudding in ATVs and Ray nearly fell off of his trying to impressive her halfway through. Luci’s eyes had been wide the entire time, soaking up the whole thing with a curiosity that Ray came to associate with her. One date turned into two, which turned into a whole series of exploring together. 

They took turns taking each other outside of their comfort zones. Ray taught Luci how to have fun the country way, with mudding and camping, and picnics in the bed of his truck as they watched the sun rise together. Luci surprised Ray with her deep thoughts, her sharp mind, and the push to better himself with her. She didn’t let him keep up his self-deprecation. They would have late night conversations, under the stars, all alone, wrapped up in each other.

She met his friends, his family, incorporated herself in his entire life.

Ray fell head over heels. And he told her so, earnest and eager and open to love. Open to a lifetime of learning and exploring with her. 

And she left him, at the edge of the cliff he was ready to jump off with no parachute, without so much as an explanation. And she took a part of him with her, whether she realized it or not, that never really came back.

005.

There were more. Some before Luci, some after. Each person was different - different backgrounds, ages, race, gender, personalities - but one thing always remained the same. Ray loved too hard, too much, too easily. Ray was open to the idea of commitment, and committed, too easily. 

 It didn’t matter who he was dating, he was the constant, he was the issue, and it hurt to admit.

Ray tried, and he loved, before-during-after the outbreak. And it went like this:

There was Rob, a brewmaster he met while at school. They dated for over a year, before graduation hit; Ray wanted to go to Atlanta and Rob wanted to go to family back in Miami.

“It’s like - you know - I really like you Nate. I like you a lot. But long distance? It never works. It’s better to end it now.”

There was Sage, a wild child trust fund girl that wanted to save the rainforest with Daddy’s money. She laughed when he asked her to be his girlfriend.

“That’s cute, you thought we were dating? It’s not that serious babe.”

There was Fi, a survivor in a camp Ray had stumbled across after leaving the Fort. She was the reason Ray stuck around for three weeks. They had had an awful fight before the camp was overrun, and she hadn’t made it out alive.

“You’re too soft, Ray. I’d chew up your sunshine and spit it out. I don’t want to see you again.”

There was Ronnie, the permanent student with four different bachelor degrees. He cheated on Ray with one of his roommates after six months of dating.

“I was bored, Nate. I’m not ready to just settle down, dude. You’re smothering me.”

There was Destiny, a small town, kindred girl he found in Atlanta not too long after Xavier. She had looked at him in the worst way when Ray had come out to her.

“I’m - I’m not - That’s not what God would want for you, you know?”

There was Jenny, a financial advisor that Ray had met through the bar and mutual friends. She had always been so carefree, maybe too carefree, maybe just too free in general.

“Oh Darlin’, I don’t think so. We’re not exactly endgame, are we?”

It didn’t matter who, when, where they were. Ray wasn’t worth keeping around - that was the universally proven fact. It was one he had to stomach his entire life, and well, it sucked, but Ray was not one to stay down. He washed off the mud, dusted off his boots, and got back up again.

000. +

Ray tried not to play the self pity card. It just wasn’t his style. But with the outbreak, losing his family, and trying to re-invent himself yet again? A relationship was the last thing he wanted or needed. Fairvale was a clean break, it was (mostly) mess free. He could be whoever he wanted or needed. He could start over, again. He could protect himself and his heart.

Love mucked all of that up. It always had.

So when he caught himself - again, Ray, really? - people watching with his eyes settling on one person, he ignored it. When he felt that small flip-flop in his belly at their smile, he pushed it down. When his day would brighten at the familiar face of a kind-of-regular-that-showed up, Ray decided he would not have a crush again, thank you very much, and make things uneven. 

He could not afford to give up his heart any more than he already had. He couldn’t afford to be let down, disregarded, by someone again.

[vivaciousoceans]

Between Birth and Death Part 1

Word count: 1, 004

Summary: Takes place towards the end of season 6, and it navigates how Emily recovered physically and mentally, from Doyle’s attack. 

A/N: I was so nervous about posting this because it’s so different from everything I’ve ever written. I’m not sure how many parts there will be, but I do have a clear outline of where I want to take this story.

Warnings: Talks of death and dying

Ernest Hemingway once said that “dying is a very simple thing. I’ve looked at death, and really I know. If I should have died it would have been very easy for me. Quite the easiest thing I ever did.”

Some people think dying is difficult, but you knew better, you knew how easy, it was. Dying is sort of like being born in reverse, as you die, your senses start fading out, one by one. First it was your sight, the world gradually got fuzzy, blurry, to the point where you couldn’t make out the features of the man leaning over you, begging you to hold on. And then there was the searing pain in your torso, slowly fading away until it was nothing but a dull throb. By this time your mind is starting to fog, but you still have a semblance of understanding what exactly is happening. You’re dying, your body is shutting down.

For a while you tried to fight. Repeating a mantra in your head. Keep your eyes open, Emily. Keep breathing, Emily. Don’t die, Emily. But you were so tired and so cold. What’s the harm in just resting your eyes? Just for a moment, but that moment pulled you into eternal darkness.

Luckily for you, you wake up. You don’t know how long you’ve been out and you’re terrified, but you can hear, you can hear the familiar whirring and beeping of hospital machines signaling that you’re alive. You’re alive. You relish in that fact, you relish in the pain, and there is so much pain. Your body feels as though you’ve been sawed in half, your face is on fire, and it feels like you’ve pulled every muscle in your body, but you’re alive.

When you open your eyes, you almost weep from joy, because you can see the fluorescent, hospital lights, and sure your vision takes a little adjusting, but you can see light again. Of course you don’t have time to focus on the lights when you hear someone’s footsteps walking towards you. Your body automatically freeze’s, your pulse quickens, and you inhale a little softer, a little deeper. As you inhale you immediately recognize that scent, jasmine and vanilla, and you can’t help the lone tear that slowly slides down your cheek, the saltiness stinging the laceration on your face. You never expected to smell that sweet, overbearing scent again, you never expected to see her again, but here she is.

You want to scream, tell her how sorry you are, tell all of them how sorry you are, but there’s a tube lodged in your throat, so you struggle to lift your hand, reaching out to her. She grabs it, gently, running her fingers over you knuckles, before interlacing her fingers with yours. “Emily…” You can tell that she’s been crying, her voice is raw and shaky, her eyes are red, swollen with shed tears. You want to tell her that it’s okay, that you’re fine, you survived, and that everythings okay now, but by the look on her face you can tell that somethings wrong, and you’re immediately filled with dread.

You, Emily Lauren Prentiss, born October 12th, 1975, are legally dead. Even though Hotch and JJ have just explained it to you, you still can’t seem to grasp the reality of it, but it’s really quite simple, and it’s totally reasonable, but whenever you think about it, you can’t help but to go back to that place. That dark place that leaves a cold, chill in your bones, that makes you chest heave as you struggle to take in air.

Suddenly your hospital bed feels too small, and the walls are closing in on you. You don’t even notice that you’re having a panic attack, until Hotch orders JJ to find a nurse while he coaches you through a breathing exercise. In..1…2..3…4…5, out 6..7…8..9…10. By the time the nurse arrives, you’ve calmed down, but you can feel that darkness looming behind you, just waiting for the next chance to swallow you whole.

Because of your elevated heart rate, the nurse decides visiting time is over. JJ and Hotch briefly say their goodbyes, and as soon as they’re gone, you feel that darkness looming over you. They’re your only tie to the real world, the only thing that reminds you that you’re alive, that you survived, that you won. Luckily for you, the nurse has given you a sedative, and before you know it you’re drifting off into a serene sleep.

When you dream, you don’t dream of darkness. You dream of a hill and a girl. She’s young, six or maybe seven, and she’s on top of the hill. She has flowing dark hair, and a pure smile, a smile full of light. She’s dancing in the sun, you want to stay there forever, just to watch her dance, but you feel drawn to her, like she’s waiting, beckoning you to come towards her. So you walk towards her, your lips turning up into a smile, the sun warm on your face. As you walk the hill gets steeper and steeper, and when you reach the top, the little girl is gone, and so is the sun, and so is the light. You search everywhere, calling for her, but you know the darkness has swallowed her whole.

When you wake, you wake with a start, air rushing into your lungs quickly causing you to wheeze. The tube clogging your airways makes it impossible for you to catch your breath. Luckily for you, your nurse was just making her rounds. She lays you flat on your back, coaxing you into a stable breathing cycle. When you’ve calmed down, she looks at you with a smile, and it reminds of that little girl in your dreams, which reminds you of Penelope. A beacon of light in this cruel, cruel world. When you see her, if you see her again, you vow to tell her exactly what she is to you.

[eusage]

        task one: questionnaire.

                                              & fantasy is hardly an escape from reality;                                                            it's a way of understanding it. 

001. how did your muse find out about being a demigod, and how did they react? 

it is one thing to be told that your mother is a literal goddess, and another to actually believe said words--especially when the speaker of them is not exactly the most trustworthy of sources. 

from the very day sage took his first breath he has been told that he’s special; that his mother is the goddess of witchcraft and magic; that he is “ a fucking wizard! ”. his father has never made a point of hiding his mother from him, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that sage has always believed him. if not for the fact that the man was a complete stoner, then there was still a strong possibility that he had been too absorbed in his fantasy books to have a warped perception of reality (at least sage could still partially relate to that much). 

of course, there have been a couple of incidents that left him to reconsider the chances of his father telling him the truth. his peculiar love for plants and herbs; the fact that he would generally feel far more energized during the night; but most of all, the time where he accidentally set a classmate’s clothes on fire for spouting nonsense about his father. unexplainably, he then managed to pass it off as though it had been set ablaze by a candle next to him (that had not even been lit, but they somehow believed them anyway. it later occurred to him that it must have been the mist).

yet it wasn’t until hecate finally showed herself to him many years later that he finally accepted his father’s words as the truth.

002. how does your muse’s mortal family feel about them being a demigod? 

the fact that his father claimed him to be a wizard and even called him sage to take a jab at his heritage.. no more words are needed to describe his sentiment on the matter. eugene (his father) has always held hecate in high regard as well, and was actually the one who tried to convince sage of his powers. perhaps if sage had tried to look past his father’s reputation of being a drug addict who made zero sense, he would have figured it all out a bit sooner. nothing is more poisonous to a child’s mind than the nasty words the kids on the playground feed to you. he might have pretended that their accusations didn’t get through to him; but what was he supposed to do at barely 7 years of age? 

even then, after sage had finally accepted the truth of his heritage, his father has always been his biggest supporter. if possible, he was perhaps even more excited about the magic his son was able to cast than sage had ever been himself. whenever eugene was sober enough to pay attention, he’d spend time by his side to look after him and aid him however well he could (and in return, sage would sometimes pretend as if he truly did need the help, just so he could spend more time with his father).

003. when did they get claimed by their godly parent? 

barely eleven years of age, his world is turned upside down when he finds his father passed out cold on the kitchen floor. it’s fear that has the adrenaline rushing through his young body at the time; the anxiety that puts him into autopilot. check pulse. call 911. cover him with a blanket. there is nothing on his mind but survival; it’s almost as if he has done this before. but he hasn’t, and the cool exterior is nothing but a facade that he keeps on because he knows that he’ll come crashing when he drops it. 

but he doesn’t have to stay strong forever. by the time they allow him inside his father’s hospital room, the emotions finally come pouring out. there’s barely any time for him to catch his breath between sobbing and hiccuping. puffy red eyes and wet sleeves that reveal what he’s been wiping his tears with. it’s the first time he realises the severity of his father’s drug addiction. 

it is also the first time hecate ever shows herself to him. without introduction, she simply seats herself next to him on the concrete floor of the building, arms pulling her son in to soothe him and ease his pain. with her motherly presence, but also with a slight touch of magic. there is nothing but comforting words that she whispers to him while she gently brushes his hair. it doesn’t take long before sage finds himself asleep in her arms, his breathing finally evening out again. their first meeting might have been unorthodox, but at least she’d been there when he needed her most. 

a week later, she shows herself again. although she non-verbally claimed sage as her son already in the hospital, this time she returns to spend the entire day with him. hecate is sweet and patient; but she is also a mother, and very protective of her children. the goddess tells him all he needs to know about surviving as a demigod, and how to practice his skills best. she tells him to protect himself and to never let his guard down. to look out for himself only. she also tells himself that his father is a brilliant man, but to not count on him to save his life. he’s gotta do that himself.

of course, she says, she will always be there when he needs her. all he needs to do is ask. 

004. did they attend a camp? 

sage never attended any demigod camp prior to attending eonia. he did, however, recreate his own miniature demigod camp of sorts back in new york city. 

way back in 2010, when his father’s drug addiction took a turn for the worst, sage had no other option but to leave him behind and seek shelter for himself. on the down side, the young demigod had a bank account with just about fifty dollars in it; barely enough to provide himself with some food for the weeks to come, and definitely not enough to find a comfortable place to reside in. on the pro side: thanks to hecate, he was able to keep himself warm and grant himself protection from the outside world and monsters. that way, sage managed to live on his own for a while, turning an empty building into a safe haven of sorts. 

it didn’t take long until he’d run into other demigods and invite them to stay with him for the time being. not only would it stop him from being so lonely, it also gave them the chance to practice their abilities and grow stronger together. they became almost like a small family, and although it technically was not a demigod camp, it certainly shared some of the same aspects of one. 

005. was your muse ever sent on any quests? 

because sage has never been to any demigod camp, he has also never been sent on any quests. not that he feels as if he’s been missing out. frankly speaking, quests never seemed like his type of thing. he’d much rather be working behind the scenes; if he did go on quests, he’d most likely be focusing solely on protecting the others. 

006. what’s their relationship with their godly parent?  

sage has nothing but admiration for his mother, regardless of how little she has been in his life. in troubled times, hecate has always been there for him. perhaps not always in person, but asking was all sage ever needed to do to reach her. in fact, she is also the goddess he prays to when asking for protection or favors. 

having a deity for a parent will never be the same as having a mortal parent. it is simply impossible for them to constantly be around in their children’s life. sage understands that much, and so he is at peace with not being able to see his mother as often as regular kids. would he wish to see her more? sure. he’d love to spend more time with her and just have some coffee or talk about anything that is not demigod related. but hecate has still been a constant factor in his life more than most other gods have been to their children, and for that he is ever so grateful. 

if anything, hecate has always helped him get a better understanding of his powers. she guided him through the beginning stages of spell casting and helped him get a better understanding of the mist. weren’t it for her, he probably wouldn’t have half the control over his powers as he does now. 

007. your muse’s favorite part about being a demigod? 

the magic! truly, if he had been able to choose a demigod parent of his own, it still would have been hecate. when it comes to magic, there are infinite possibilities of utilising it and sage absolutely loves discovering all of them. he could spend his entire life practicing magic and never grow bored of it. what else is to be expected from someone who practically lives in fantasy books? this demigod doesn’t even need drugs to lose touch with reality, all he needs is his books, magic, and sleepless nights. 

other than that, the fact that his powers are one of the strongest sources of protecting other demigods is one of his favorite aspects. he’d love to continue doing what he’s done in new york for all those years; provide a safe shelter to other wayward demigods and allow them to learn from one another. 

008. your muse’s least favorite part about being a demigod? 

there is not much that sage doesn’t like about being a demigod, but if he had to pick something, it would probably be the lack of a parental figure in his life. perhaps with more of a motherly presence in his life, he’d better understand himself as a person. when it comes to all things demigod and magic, sage has a pretty good understanding of it all. when it comes to himself and his feelings, however, he wonders if having a more consistent adult presence in his life would have made things different. maybe he wouldn’t be so insistent to please everyone all the time; maybe he wouldn’t start crying over every little thing; and maybe he wouldn’t walk off every time he clashes with someone rather than facing them (or sometimes even use the mist to control their thoughts and feelings).

009. what’s your muse’s weapon and battle proficiency? 

battlefield related skills? what are those? sage is practically clueless when it comes to physical combat, and so he prefers not to engage in it. however, throughout the years he’s spent looking after younger demigods, it’s been stressing him out that he has no ways of defending himself should it ever come down to it. unfair as it is, his powers do not work as well during the day, and dismissing physical combat and/or defense entirely is a luxury that he cannot afford. 

his weapon of choice would always be his wand; engraved with latin enchantments all over. he doesn’t necessarily need it when casting protective spells, but if he were to go on the offense and attack monsters, he’d still use it for maximum effect. he usually opts to make use of a knife during his battle classes, however. it feels less like a weapon to directly attack an opponent, and more somewhat of a defensive attribute. and, to be fair, if he were to wield a sword.. only the gods would know of the catastrophes that could follow.

[dvlwthn]

“  we’re  one  with  the  sea  .  ”

Is that NOAH CENTINEO? No, that’s just ATLAS LAVEAU. They were born on 09/05/96 and are a MERMAID living in Northknot Town. They work as a SWIM INSTRUCTOR at Good Vibrations Gym. Some say they're PROTECTIVE and INTELLIGENT, but I’ve heard others say they're EMOTIONAL and BLUNT. When you think of HIM, don’t you think of SUNSHINE AFTER RAIN, OCEANS SO BLUE YOU CAN’T LOOK AWAY, LOYALTY SO STRONG IT CAN’T BE BROEKN?

A E S T H E T I C

swimming  to  the  bottom  of  the  ocean  .  peace  in  the  silence  .  the  sound  of  clicking  from  a  keyboard  .  mind  always  wondering  .  leaving  words  of  poetry  behind  everywhere  .  carrying  a  notebook  around  for  no  one  to  see  .  stopping  in  the  middle  of  something  to  write  something  down  .  unbreakable  loyalty  .  kind  smiles  ,  forgiving  nature  .

Q U O T E S

“  you  must  always  remember  this  :  have  courage  ,  and  be  kind .  you  have  more  kindness  in  your  little  finger  than  most  people  possess  in  their  whole  body  .  and  it  has  power  .  more  than  you  know  .  ”   –  brittany candau. “  i  see  myself  forever  and  ever  as  the  ridiculous  [ person ]  ,  the  lonely  soul  ,  the  wanderer  ,  the  restless  frustrated  artist  ,  the  person  in  love  [  with  love  ]  ,  always  in  search  of  the  absolute  ,  always  seeking  the  unattainable  .  ”   –  henry miller. “  i’m  with  you  in  rockland  . . .  where  we  are  great  writers  on  the  same  dreadful  typewriter  .  ”   –  allen ginsberg .

M U S I C    P L A Y E R

“   and  i  can't  sleep  .  i'm  up  at  night  ,  you're  in  my  ear  and  i'm  alright  .  i’m  trying  not  to  put  it  on  the  line  .  and  i  am  so  tired  of  losing  sleep  .  i  just  want  to  keep  you  around  .  you  make  me  feel  alright  .  you  make  me  feel  alright  .  you  make  me  feel  like  everything  is  gonna  be  just  fine  .  ”   just fine by spookyghostboy. “   je  veux  de  l'amour  ,  de  la  joie  ,  de  la  bonne  humeur  .  ce  n'est  pas  votre  argent  qui  fera  mon  bonheur  .  moi  je  veux  crever  la  main  sur  le  cœur  .  allons  ensemble  ,  découvrir  ma  liberté  .  oubliez  donc  tous  vos  clichés  bienvenue  dans  ma  réalité  .  ”   je veux by zaz. “   sometimes  there's  bullshit  that  don't  work  now  .  we  all  got  our  stories  but  please  tell  me  what  there  is  to  complain  about  .  when  you're  happy  like  a  fool  ,  let  it  take  you  over  .  when  everything  is  out  ,  you  gotta  take  it  in  .  oh  ,  this  has  gotta  be  the  good  life  .  ”   good life by onerepublic.

P E R S O N A L I T Y

+ intelligent, protective, and kind

- sometimes too optimists, blunt, and emotional

atlas has been through a lot of hurt. however, unlike most people he hasn’t let it change him. people take his kindness as a weakness but he see’s it as a strength... that he won’t let anyone change him no matter how cruel they can be. he wants to believe that people aren’t all bad, sometimes he tries a little too hard to believe that. but he isn’t naive either when it came to what he expected from other people. the man isn’t oblivious, he just likes to try to have hope. to not expect the worst from people until they give him no other choice to. sometimes, he also can’t help himself and is a little blunt. he never does it to be rude or hurt anyone’s feelings... it’s just he is protective and will call someone out on something in order to protect them. also the little pretentious writer in him sometimes makes him unable to stop himself from just saying certain things as they are. 

H E A D C A N O N S

001. atlas henrik laveau never knew his father, not that he ever cared about that. the boy was a huge mama’s boy. his mother was the strongest person he knew. growing up with only his mother, and his two step sisters. . . atlas grew up seeing the strength in women and couldn’t be prouder of his family.  002. however, being the only boy, atlas did always want a little brother. and he found that in a young boy whose family lived near his. it started with him just being asked to watch the young boy (eric) but eventually turned into him adoring the kid like his little brother. his family and friends all know how atlas saw the young boy and welcomed him themselves as well. 003. atlas prided himself on learning as much as he could on anything and everything. about his world under the sea and the world above. human, vampires, werewolves, witches, etc. he wanted to be ready for when he moved to the land above, it was always part of his plan. plus, he wanted to help his hybrid best friend as much as he could. 004. when he was younger, atlas’ favourite thing had always been writing and telling stories. he was always a creative person and enjoyed sharing all of his ideas. due to this, atlas was known for always thinking outside the box. 005. he ended up going through a hard time when eric was killed. it had been a day that he was asked to go watch the young boy, but he couldn’t do it. so eric’s parents moved their day around and stayed with him. atlas had finished his day early was was going to go surprise the boy and maybe offer to help out so the parents could do whatever else they could. however, when he arrived, he found the entire family had been murdered. atlas took it really hard and blamed himself. he even stopped talking for a couple of months. he spoke to NO ONE and the only person who could get some type of reaction out of him had been his best friend. 006. at the right age, atlas wasted no time in getting his ring so he could travel above land. he didn’t make the move just yet, cause he wasn’t fully ready to leave his family. but mars and him traded off on who was visiting who. he loved the land and wishes his family felt the same, but they loved the ocean too much. so he stayed for awhile longer before eventually making the move all together. though he does visit his family still. family is everything to the man. 007. he’s currently working at the gym as a swim  instructor, but he only does that while working on his book. everything is looking well for him, he already has publishers who want to work with him. he just needs to make a choice and small changes to his book that he feels he didn’t write correctly. he’s very excited about what’s to come.

C O N N E C T I O N S

BEST FRIEND. these two grew up together and have always been close. they’ve always seen each other as family and don’t keep secrets from one another. atlas knows he can tell mars anything and never be judged, just like she can do with him.   [ TAKEN ; marcelline ]

CLOSE FRIENDS. these would be the people he goes to that isn’t mars. probably someone who is a little more like him. at least in the sense where they are more kind and forgiving compared to most of the people in town. they could meet when atlas got to town and kind of just hit it off. or just sometime since he’s been around and just grew close kinda quickly. i just want him to have a couple of people he’s really close with.   [ 1/2 (could be down for three) ; tabitha ]

CO-WORKER. ever hear of a work wife/husband? that’s what this person is to atlas. they are very close and are always there to help each other. their other co-workers tease them about acting like a married couple at work, but it really is just a platonic friendship.   [ OPEN ; xx ]

EX GIRLFRIEND. i would really love one of those obvious jealous exes who broke up with their boyfriend due to him being so close to their best (girl) friend. so this person, whom atlas loved so much, really didn’t like how close atlas was to mars and grew tired of people making assumptions about him and mars. it eventually got to the point of them telling atlas to pick between them and his best friend. they didn’t realise how much atlas actually LOVED them. now, however, atlas can’t see them the same and they act very bitter toward each other.   [ OPEN ; xx ]

CRUSH. someone atlas has a bit of a crush on. they don’t need to return the feelings. this is just someone he really admires but never acts on his feelings because he doesn’t want to ruin their friend ship. *bonus points though if they do return his feelings and they are thinking the same way he is. that they are worried about ruining the friendship too.   [ OPEN ; xx ]

EX BOYFRIEND. they were friends first and things kind of just happened. it was one of those relationships that just made sense. however, after a few months, this person decided they just wanted to be friends. while it hurt atlas, he understood and agreed. yet since then, the two are just awkward around each other. atlas still has a soft spot for this person and wishes they could actually be friends again.   [ OPEN ; xx ] 

DISLIKE. atlas tried to get along with everyone, he really does. but this person just DOESN’T like him and atlas isn’t too upset about it. they rub him the wrong way anyways. or maybe it’s vice versa. . . atlas can’t stand them? they rub him the wrong way and he just CAN’T see past it.   [ OPEN ; xx ]

[herculeanlabors]

The Valley of Youth // cnf [004]

I was ten when I met twelve-year-old Andy in the valley of my youth. He was the happy kid; with his bright smiles, his chipped tooth, and eyes as radiant as a thousand suns. However, he was also a sickly kid, always coughing and tired. I didn’t mind, I had a friend. In no time, he became my closest friend, my confidante. We could spend hours with each other without ever growing tired, and the world could pass by without either of us noticing. He came at a time in my childhood that was at its darkest and stayed in my heart ever since. That’s the thing about sanctuaries; they come when you least expect them and they stay with you forever.

Everything changed when his uncle died of lung cancer in September 2016. His uncle had always been his cornerstone, and he looked up to him for all his life. He was fifteen, and god knows how terrible being fifteen is while you grieve. In the valley of our youth, it was then that he dove head-first into using substances to ease the pain of grieving. With that and the fact that he was never far from being sick, I was terrified. Here was the one constant thing in my life and he had changed in the blink of an eye. Ravaged by desolation and suppressing grief, all that was left was a stranger that yelled at me whenever I tried to seek help for him. The valley only grew deeper then.

I never wanted to lose him. He was the first kind thing that existed in what felt like eons. I felt safe with him, and I felt found. Oh, to be lost in the valley of my youth and to be found by someone who asks nothing of you, but to be okay.

He was diagnosed with what the doctors called as Small Cell Lung Cancer four months later. I was naive then. I didn’t know then that it was one of the most brutal forms of the illness. Imagine a swimming pool filled with gasoline and hypothetical match lit deep within it. Now imagine the pool was your lungs and the match was the cancer. Instant and deadly, almost assuredly spreading beyond the confines of the organ. He cracked his first smile back then. A fake one, of course. “Come on. If Hazel Grace could live with it, I could too,” he said then. I knew him too well at this point and I could almost see the shock and fear seeping through. I remember that day so clearly; the room, his mother whispering hushed appellations to an exhausted doctor, and the regrets burning in his honeyed eyes.

I used to see him as an unmovable figure in my life. He could have walked with the gods, his youth spilling out of him like a thousand suns. He was golden. Almost like the son of Apollo and the best of gods and men. Only he wasn’t. He was human. And I felt the bile in my stomach while watching him change into just another dying man.

He started treatment and radiation three weeks later. We all know how it goes, and I desperately want to tell you he took it like a champion. Woe to the lost hair, the will to live beaten down by angry attacks of chemotherapy and radiation. He didn’t tell me much during those days. He always came back to the room sleeping. A small reprieve, I suppose, for everyone. We wouldn’t have to see how much it was hurting him. 

He told me how it was sometime later. It’s like a dozen men with fists just pummeling down on you like a meteor shower. Like your bones are made of glass. Like a never-ending fever. That’s how it was in the valley of youth, no sunlight came to destroy the darkness. But despite all that, he fought for two more years.

The worst came in December of 2018. It was almost the holidays. I went to a theme park with friends from school. It was there that I received news that sweet Andy couldn’t breathe on his own anymore.

It was hard seeing someone battle for their life while hooked up to a thousand machines. It was even harder knowing you loved that person, and that you would’ve given anything for them to live. By that time, the cancer had spread beyond his lungs. They reached his liver, his bones, and probably his brain.

I had my last conversation with him around ten in the evening just as I was about to go home and cry myself to sleep. He had managed to calm down and his mother told me he wanted to speak with me. Two years. Two years of believing that day wouldn’t come. I felt betrayed. By god, by the doctors, by him. I was the age he was when the whole ordeal began, and he was leaving me.

“Shine on,” he said. “You shine on.”

He died later that night. At 2:57 AM. His father called sometime around then and I knew. I knew before I ever answered. I’m always so surprised with the swiftness and suddenness of death. You exist for a moment, then you are gone forever. All your hopes, your dreams, your pains; all that you are returning to dust.

He left at the young age of seventeen. Right now, I’m just as old as he was when he went through as much pain and suffering. It’s been almost two years and I miss him everyday. It’s hard, having spent so much of your life with someone to the point that they feel like a sibling you never had, only to have fate snatch them away from you.

Nobody at school knew him. And instead of grieving, I poured my heart and soul out into the academics until I had nothing left to give. I grieved later on, at the dawn of my time in Senior High School.

That’s how things were here in the valley of my youth. It was like nothing had changed. But deep within me, I knew. Nothing would ever be the same.

[candiheart]

(( hc 004 / ??? ))

Noemi Wilson wasn’t the best mom. Carrie doesn’t talk about that part, but it’s clear when you look back to when she was little that it’s very much the case. Her mother’s parents though took care of Carrie a lot when she was young, after her mother left. Her father Trevor was so busy, going on tour and all that, so he left the young girl in a place he thought would be better than a bus and a million hotels, in the hands of her grandparents about half the year. 

She was 10 years old when her mother was completely out of her life, when the phone calls and visits were clearly done forever, and frankly, it was the worst era of Carrie’s life. She couldn’t let that show though... She may not be sure why her dad’s got his therapist on speed dial, but that’s been going on long before this happened, and she knows for a fact he doesn’t want to see his baby girl broken to pieces. That would be too much for their fragile little family. 

So Carrie worked harder than she ever had before, she threw herself deeper into her work in the music program, started what would become Dirty Candy, stopped talking to Julie as much. Julie’s mom and her dad were close back in the day, hence her friendship with the girl, but jealousy ran deep. Gosh that girl had everything Carrie never could have, that loving family that eats dinner together every single night... Carrie never ever had that, even the illusion was gone long, long ago, and now it was never going to happen. 

So while she struggled and got so much deeper into her sadness, she still fought to keep her chair in the music program in their school district, and she did keep it. She proved that she’d earned her spot that her daddy didn’t “buy it” like so many people liked to say. It hurt that Julie’s new best friend liked to gossip about her, about her dad’s money especially. But she had Kayla, she had Dirty Candy, and she had the music program. Plus, she had her dad, at least sometimes. 

When Julie's mom passed, Carrie couldn’t help but get angrier and angrier as a whole year passed and Julie got to keep her spot in the program despite not touching the piano keys or singing a single note. Carrie fought for her life in a school full of kids who didn’t think she deserved to be there, thought she was all pocketbook and no talent. They began to accept her more as Dirty Candy got bigger, but the snide comments, things like Julie’s best friend of all people calling her a Demon, they got to her. 

She’s jealous, she’s always been jealous. The overconfidence, it’s always been a front, Julie of all people ought to know that, but maybe their friendship had been more surface level. Who knows really, all Carrie knows is that while Julie had everyone’s sympathy, and got special treatment, she got picked at in whispers by her classmates, the people who her dad always told her should adore her. She was Trevor’s little star in the making, and gosh did Carrie want her dad to give her attention, for him to be proud of her finally... But no, no she wasn’t enough yet, maybe someday she’ll make him see her. 

[ddudumemes]

K-12 SENTENCE STARTERS

(( collection of ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY TWO sentence starters taken from MELANIE MARTINEZ’S second studio album ‘ K-12 ’ . ))

001. WHEELS  ON  THE  BUS  . ‘  it’s  cold  outside  .  ’ ‘  there  are  two  boys  yelling  behind  me  .  ’ ‘  i’m  terrified  .  ’ ‘  i’m  trying  to  ignore  it  .  ’ ‘  it’s  fucking  boring  .  ’ ‘  i’m  saying  nothing  .  ’ ‘  no  one’s  watching  us  .  ’ ‘  don’t  give  a  fuck  .  ’ ‘  puff  ,  puff  ,  and  pass  it  .  ’ ‘  don’t  be  a  dick  .  ’ ‘  i  hate  him  .  ’

002.  CLASS  FIGHT  . ‘  the  teacher  wasn’t  looking  .  ’ ‘  i  fell  in  love  with  him  ,  but  he  wasn’t  in  my  life  .  ’ ‘  mommy  ,  why  do  i  feel  sad  ??  ’ ‘  should  i  give  him  away  or  feel  this  bad  ??  ’ ‘  don’t  you  choke  .  ’ ‘  daddy  chimed  in  “  go  for  the  throat  .  ”  .  ’  ‘  go  for  the  throat  .  ’ ‘  her  face  was  fucked  up  .  ’ ‘  my  hands  were  bloody  .  ’ ‘  my  one  true  love  called  me  a  monster  .  ’

003.  THE  PRINCIPAL  . ‘  always  peeping  ,  fucking  creeping  .  ’ ‘  what  if  i  had  told  your  mother  her  son  was  a  cruel  motherfucker  ??  ’ ‘  it’s  not  just  me  ,  it’s  everybody  who  thinks  that  you’re  fucking  ugly  .  ’ ‘  forced  to  follow  the  leader  .  ’ ‘  i’ve  tried  to  make  you  listen  ,  but  you  won’t  ,  it’s  your  way  ,  right  ??  ’ ‘  shooting  at  the  angels  while  claiming  you’re  the  good  guy  .  ’ ‘  all  you  want  is  cash  and  hype  .  ’ ‘  fuck  our  dreams  .  ’ ‘  that’s  not  right  .  ’ ‘  oh  ,  where’s  the  principle  ??  ’ ‘  you’re  fixated  and  elated  .  ’ ‘  fuck  all  of  your  rules  and  guidelines  .  ’ ‘  can’t  you  see  that  we’re  all  hurting  ??  ’ ‘  excuse  me  ,  how  much  are  you  earning  ??  ’ ‘  you  don’t  know  the  pain  that  you  are  causing  .  ’ ‘  your  actions  hurt  .  so  do  your  words  .  ’ ‘  the  more  you  try  to  fuck  us  over  we  will  be  there  yelling  at  your  front  door  .  ’

004.  SHOW  &  TELL  . ‘  you  pull  me  by  my  hair  ,  so  i  don’t  go  nowhere  .  ’ ‘  tell  me  you  love  me  ,  but  you  treat  me  like  i’m  never  there  .  ’ ‘  you  say  the  cruelest  words  ,  and  yes  ,  they  break  my  heart  .  ’ ‘  i’m  over  here  working  my  ass  off  .  ’ ‘  why  is  it  so  hard  to  see  ,  if  cut  myself  i  would  bleed  ??  ’ ‘  i’m  just  like  you  ,  you’re  like  me  .  ’ ‘  imperfect  ,  and  human  ,  are  we  .  ’ ‘  i’m  on  display  for  all  you  fuckers  to  see  .  ’ ‘  buy  and  sell  me  ,  baby  .  ’ ‘  i’m  a  product  to  society  .  ’ ‘  art  don’t  sell  ,  unless  you’ve  fucked  every  authority  .  ’ ‘  you  beg  and  cry  for  more  ,  and  yet  i’m  on  the  floor  .  ’ ‘  there  are  strangers  taking  pictures  of  me  when  i  ask  “  no  more  !!  ”  .  ’ ‘  it’s  really  hard  for  me  to  say  just  how  i  feel  .  ’ ‘  i’m  scared  that  i’ll  get  thrown  away  .  ’ ‘  why  can’t  you  fucking  hear  me  ?!  ’ ‘  are  you  listening  yet  ??  ’   

005.  NURSE’S  OFFICE  . ‘  don’t  punch  me  .  ’ ‘  just  let  me  go  .  ’ ‘  i’m  coughing  ,  i’m  bleeding  .  ’ ‘  they  hate  me  .  ’ ‘  i’m  faking  all  of  this  so  they  take  me  home  .  ’ ‘  i’m  tired  of  wishing  i  was  ditching  .  ’ ‘  can  i  sit  right  there  ??  ’ ‘  this  bitch  behind  me  is  cutting  my  hair  .  ’ ‘  i  faked  up  a  seizure  and  left  then  and  there  .  ’ 

006.  DRAMA  CLUB  . ‘  everyone’s  so  soft  ,  everyone’s  so  sensitive  .  ’ ‘  do  i  offend  you  ??  you’re  hanging  on  my  sentences  .  ’ ‘  i’ma  take  a  bow  so  you  can  kiss  my  ass  .  ’ ‘  i  never  signed  up  for  your  drama  .  ’ ‘  they  try  to  feed  you  lines  that  you  have  to  memorize  .  ’ ‘  do  you  even  have  a  brain  ??  ’ ‘  you’re  faking  all  your  pain  .  ’ ‘  you’re  bleeding  on  a  stage  .  ’ ‘  i  don’t  wanna  be  an  actress  living  by  a  script  .  ’ ‘  i  don’t  give  a  shit  .  ’ ‘  you’re  over-analysing  every  word  i  say  .  ’ ‘  i  think  it’s  pretty  boring  .  ’ 

007.  STRAWBERRY  SHORTCAKE  . ‘  feeling  unsure  of  my  naked  body  .  ’ ‘  wondering  why  i  don’t  look  like  barbie  .  ’ ‘  they  say  boys  like  girls  with  a  tiny  waist  .  ’ ‘  my  mama’s  preaching  to  make  sure  i’m  pure  .  ’ ‘  i  never  really  cared  about  this  shit  before  .  ’ ‘  got  boys  acting  like  they  ain’t  seen  skin  before  .  ’ ‘  got  sent  home  to  change  because  my  skirt  is  too  short  .  ’ ‘  it’s  my  fault  .  ’ ‘  it’s  my  bad  ,  no  one  told  them  not  to  grab  .  ’ ‘  it’s  how  i  look  and  not  what  i  think  .  ’

008.  LUNCHBOX  FRIENDS  . ‘  hey  girl  ,  will  you  sit  with  me  ??  ’ ‘  we  can  be  friends  if  you  wanna  be  .  but  only  ‘til  the  clock  hits  three  .  ’ ‘  after  lunch  we  can  walk  to  class  .  ’ ‘  they  all  want  a  bite  of  me  .  ’ ‘  they  gossip  about  hoes  that  they  don’t  know  ...  they  talk  shit  though  .  ’ ‘  i  don’t  want  no  lunchbox  friends  .  ’ ‘  i  want  someone  who  understands  .  ’ ‘  come  to  my  house  ,  let’s  die  together  .  ’ ‘  friendship  that  will  last  forever  .  ’ ‘  people  have  high  expectations  of  me  .  ’ ‘  wanna  be  my  best  friend  ,  then  judge  me  if  i  smoke  a  little  weed  .  ’

009.  ORANGE  JUICE  . ‘  you’re  screaming  at  the  mirror  .  ’ ‘  fooling  those  around  of  your  bulimia  .  ’ ‘  you  turn  oranges  to  orange  juice  .  ’ ‘  your  body  is  imperfectly  perfect  .  ’ ‘  everyone  wants  what  the  other  one’s  working  .  ’ ‘  please  say  that  you  won’t  continue  .  ’ ‘  the  way  you  look  is  not  an  issue  .  ’ ‘  i  wish  i  could  give  you  my  set  of  eyes  .  ’ ‘  i  wish  i  could  tell  you  that  you’re  fine  ,  but  you  would  find  that  disconcerting  .  ’

010.  DETENTION  . ‘  i’m  not  a  bad  guy  .  ’ ‘  please  don’t  be  mad  if  i  don’t  smile  back  .  ’ ‘  if  i  fuck  up  my  words  ,  don’t  think  i’m  absurd  ,  alright  ??  ’ ‘  i’m  physically  exhausted  .  ’ ‘  you  write  me  up  and  say  it’s  love  .  ’ ‘  baby  ,  can  you  meet  me  tonight  ??  ’ ‘  i  can  feel  your  blood  pressure  rise  ,  fuck  this  tension  .  ’ ‘  let  me  crawl  into  your  mind  .  ’ ‘  pretending  everything’s  alright  is  detention  .  ’ ‘  the  teachers  don’t  care  about  me  .  ’ ‘  they  let  them  do  whatever  they  want  to  me  .  ’ ‘  i  wanna  go  home  .  ’

011.  TEACHER’S  PET  . ‘  caught  the  teacher  giving  his  eyes  to  a  student  .  ’ ‘  it’s  for  all  the  right  reasons  .  ’ ‘  don’t  call  me  crazy  .  ’ ‘  you  love  me  ,  but  you  won’t  come  save  me  .  ’ ‘  if  i’m  so  special  ,  why  am  i  secret  ??  ’ ‘  do  you  regret  the  things  we  shared  that  i’ll  never  forget  ??  ’ ‘  i  know  i’m  young  ,  but  my  mind  is  well  beyond  my  years  .  ’ ‘  fuck  you  ,  don’t  you  leave  me  here  !!  ’ ‘  you  liar  .  ’ ‘  you  don’t  own  me  ,  do  you  ??  i  bet  you  think  you  do  .  well  ,  you  don’t  .  ’

012.  HIGH  SCHOOL  SWEETHEARTS  . ‘  can  we  just  be  honest  ??  ’ ‘  these  are  the  requirements  if  you  think  you  can  be  my  one  and  only  true  love  .  ’ ‘  you  must  promise  to  love  me  .  ’ ‘  if  you  fuck  me  over  i  will  rip  your  fucking  face  apart  .  ’ ‘  you  must  accept  that  i’m  a  little  out  of  my  mind  .  ’ ‘  give  me  passion  .  ’ ‘  if  you  can’t  handle  a  heart  like  mine  ,  don’t  waste  your  time  with  me  .  ’ ‘  high  school  sweethearts  line  up  .  ’ ‘  you  can’t  be  scared  to  show  me  off  and  hold  my  hand  .  ’ ‘  if  you  can’t  put  in  work  i  don’t  know  what  you  think  this  fucking  is  .  ’ ‘  if  you  cheat  you  will  die  .  ’ ‘  could  you  hold  me  through  the  night  ??  ’ ‘  could  you  be  my  first  time  ??  ’ ‘  don’t  be  a  waste  of  my  time  .  ’

013.  RECESS  . ‘  i  was  too  young  to  see  the  truth  .  ’ ‘  too  naive  to  even  care  .  ’ ‘  people  gonna  say  “  if  you  need  a  break  someone’ll  take  your  place  ”  .  ’ ‘  people  gonna  try  to  tell  you  you’re  fine  ,  with  dollars  in  their  eyes  .  ’ ‘  don’t  let  them  fuck  you  ,  honey  .  ’ ‘  don’t  let  them  hurt  you  ,  baby  .  ’ ‘  i  should  be  happy  but  i  can’t  get  out  my  bed  .  ’ ‘  stressing  about  the  voices  screamin’  inside  my  head  .  ’ ‘  where  has  my  time  gone  ??  and  my  mind  gone  ??  ’ ‘  i  can’t  find  euphoria  .  ’

[vldchaewon]

a playlist consisting of  8  tracks that remind me of chaewon.   (  listen here + plus one bonus track because spotify doesn’t have track 7  )

track 001: rainbow kitten surprise, painkillers.

“living just comes with a bit of heartache, heartache comes with a bit of young faith faith stays young ‘til your heart gets broken, hope grows up to become someday i’ll never hurt no one and no one will ever hurt me, i believe, i believe, i believe faith plays dumb ‘til the doubts all leave.”

chaewon has always been laughably optimistic. a lot of people misunderstand her as being naive, and she’ll never correct them; she doesn’t think naive is a bad thing to be, anyway. the truth is that she’s just as uncertain as everyone else, but she’s found that the best way to silence her self-doubt is to fake confidence until it becomes real. you could say that she has too much faith in the universe, but sometimes, faith is exactly what you need to become who you want to be.

track 002: lauv, billy.

“to all the people that were mean, he just channeled your energy. and hey, look who’s laughing now, he said thank you for your doubts. and to the people that believed, he just channeled your energy.”

chaewon definitely wasn’t destined to become an idol. she was a clumsy, awkward kid without an ounce of coordination, and when she first started dancing, she was laughed at endlessly — even by her family. everyone tried to gently turn her away from performing, but she pretended that she didn’t know what they were doing and used their laughter as motivation to get better. to make sure that no one would ever have a reason to laugh at her again.

track 003: onlychild, lost.

“together we will never be lost, keep running and we’ll never be caught. and once you get the feeling, don’t stop, together we will never be lost.”

chaewon is the type of person who lives in the moment and takes every risk, regardless of the probability of failure. she believes that the only way to get what she wants out of life is to run towards it without fear — this applies to anything from her bigger goals like becoming an idol to the smaller ones, like just having a good day. she tries to encourage those around her to have the same outlook.

track 004: sleeping at last, body.

“there’s magic in our bones, a north star in our soul that remembers our way home. god, it’s easy to forget that there’s magic in all of this.”

all things considered, chaewon views life as a very beautiful experience. she’s able to find something positive in even the worst circumstances ( even if it’s a reach ), and that optimism helps her to enjoy every moment while it lasts. she’s constantly reminding herself of what a blessing it is so be alive, to be here, to have the opportunities that she has. she’s the only one living life through her eyes, and to her, that’s magical.

track 005: lorde, team.

“we live in cities you’ll never see on screen; not very pretty, but we sure know how to run things. living in ruins of a palace within my dreams and you know, we’re on each other’s team.”

as much as chaewon truly does want to be an idol, she can’t deny how difficult the process is. it takes a toll on even the strongest people, and she’s sure that it will only be harder when she debuts and everyone’s watching even more than they already are. but she doesn’t let the bad things crush her spirits — she’s excited for her future and where it will take not only her, but the other members of lark, too. they’re a team, and as long as she’s with them, she’s confident that she’ll be okay.

track 006: ajr, 100 bad days.

“100 bad days made 100 good stories, 100 good stories make me interesting at parties. no, i ain’t scared of you, no, i ain’t scared of you no more.”

a lot of bad ( ahem —— embarrassing ) things happen to chaewon, but she wouldn’t change any of it. to live a life with no obstacles can hardly be called living, and even if something gets her down in the moment, she can usually look back on it and laugh, or at least be happy that it’s a thing of the past. at this point, she’ll gladly tell life to do its worst.

track 007: alec benjamin, on your speakers.

“tell me you won’t forget. remember the night we met, rewind like an old cassette and i’ll be the song that’s on your speakers, playing for you, you, you.” 

everything about chaewon’s life before she became a trainee was inglorious, and in my ways, her life still is. there’s nothing that she’s ever wanted so much as to become someone she can be proud of, someone who can cause the best kind of scene and leave things different than they were before she found them. she’s ready to take on the world, but at the same time, she’s afraid of leaving behind who she was and even who she will be. she never wants things to end, but she knows everything has to, sooner or later, so she only hopes to leave such a mark on people that the memories will remain forever.

track 008: this wild life, catie rae.

“you’ve always been just what i’m missing, but never ever knew. you’ve always earned just what you’re given, never handed to you. you’ll always be my best decision, my one and only truth. you’ll always be my heartbeat, my rhythm, it’s always been you.”

this is a love song, BUT i think it depicts how chaewon feels about lark very well. she’s always wanted to be a performer, but she probably wouldn’t still be so passionate about it if she wasn’t grouped with girls whom she loves to the end of the earth. she always seemed confident & like she knew where she was headed, but chaewon didn’t know what she was walking into when she joined summit media. but she found something better than she ever could’ve hoped for with the girls; her loyalty will always lie with lark.

[ethanhes]

ANYTHING an ethan dolan fanmix; 

 001. erase me - kid cudi/kanye west 002. paradise - bazzi 003. the less i know the better - tame impala 004. the night is still young - nicki minaj 005. just what i am - kid cudi/king chip 006. better now - post malone 007. fluorescent adolescent - arctic monkeys 008. the funeral - band of horses 009. girls like me - will joseph cook 010. your shirt - chelsea cutler 011. hard times - paramore 012. join the club - hockey dad 013. viva la vida - coldplay 014. anything - catfish and the bottlemen 015. there's a reason why (i never returned your calls) - blossoms 016. hold back your love - white lies 017. drive all night - joan 018. desecration smile - red hot chili peppers 019. forever - lewis crepaldi 020. valentine - 5sos 021. why can't we be friends? - the academic 022. mission - catfish and the bottlemen 023. make me proud - drake/nicki minaj 024. 7 - catfish and the bottlemen 025. wake up call - nothing but thieves 026. please - the night café 027. happiness - rex orange county 028. mardy bum - arctic monkeys 029. cryin' - aerosmith 

 listen on spotify

[laylabahiti]

HSHQTASK005: A REFLECTION 

i originally posted this task in march 2017, so almost 3 years ago (wow). i already regret looking at this old one lmao

001. name / age / pronouns

2017: xee / twenty / she, her 2020: xee / twenty-three / she, her — fun fact, mine and evy’s bdays are 2 days apart #taurussquad

002. which character(s) do you play?

2017: my complicated af beaN layla. idek what’s going on with her at this point. 2020: i’m screaming i can’t believe i thought 2017 layla was complicated. i had no idea what was to come. i picked up biel not long after that. also had katalina aka brucey’s wifey n i miss her. juliana is a fairly recent addition and, i’m about to spill the beans, a glücksburg is coming.

003. nationality / ethnicity / timezone

2017: american / lots of white european and the other half o’ me is ashkenazi jewish / right now i’m back and forth between pst and mst. homeland is mst though. 2020: obvs nothing has changed except no more back and forth with timezones. strictly mst now.

004. tell us a bit about your  home state.

2017: it’s the first day of spring and we almost reached 100 degrees F :’) we don’t really have autumn or spring here tho. it’s either hot as balls summer or frozen. no in between. like, as soon as temps get below 70 F people break out their jackets. 2020: welcome to the desert, “it’s a dry heat”

005.  favourite color / fruit / season

2017: green / honeydew melon / spring 2020: still green and all its shades / tbh idk how i chose a fave fruit bc i raaarely eat it but bananas and watermelon too / “spring”

006. favourite books + writer whose writing style you admire the most

2017: this isn’t a fair question smh. i have too many titles and names going through my head at once to answer this. 2020: still no fave so i’m just gonna answer this with what i’m currently reading. it’s called suffer strong and it popped up on my insta feed last week (big brother is listening and they know i’m a stressed mf) cheese moment: i admire all ur writing styles :~)

007. what kinda music do you listen to + any fave bands / musicians

2017: listen to a lil bit of everything. these ‘favorite’ questions are difficult for me to answer 2020: same answer tho i grew up listening to the eagles so they hold a special place in my heart n soul. i get to go see them in a couple months (hopefully w my dad) and i’m v excited

008. what are you doing for a living / what are you studying?

2017: lmAO well rn i work in the kitchen of a gas station (sah classy). 2020: went from working in the store to working in corporate *finger guns* apparently i never said what i was studying but i was still in school then. justice studies with a minor in military leadership and certifications in human rights and socio-legal studies. then i studied astrophysics with minors in cyber intel + security and math for a semester, but i didn’t want any more debt ajskdf

009. what’s your dream occupation?

2017: IDK but it has to involve happiness and a nice salary. i have to feed my zoo somehow. 2020: what r dreams lmao

010. relationship status

2017: single then. single now. single forever. 2020: every time i think about putting myself out there, something happens. i don’t have time to date atm

011. coffee, tea or hot chocolate?

2017: it depends on the weather. if it’s cold i’ll have hot chocolate. i usually drink tea at meals whenever though. 2020: i blame my work for all the coffee i drink now, but still all of the above. 

012. dream holiday destination?

2017: santorini 2020: honestmeme....where the hell did i pull santorini from. idk i was supposed to go to iceland for study abroad last year but yknow i withdrew from the university. i still wanna go tho

013. the thing you’re most proud about yourself

2017: not afraid to stand up for myself + others 2020: young me made it sound noble but honestly i’ll put ppl in their place, i don’t have patience anymore jakdas. but tbh right now i guess it’s my perseverance? life has been shitty for a few months but u gotta keep on truckin’

014. tell us a bit about your family!

2017: goD they’re nuts. i’m the middle child out of all my siblings but the youngest on my dad’s side. large age gaps are common, like half my sisters are old enough to be my mom. lots of grand babies and great grand babies. when we’re all together (like this past weekend) it’s ….wild. communication is v poor too. i only have one brother out of my eight siblings, and all those siblings are only half-related to me. at 5′5 i’m one of the tallest in the fam which says a lot. 2020: they’re still nuts n i don’t speak to my mother anymore. i should probs add that my parents have been divorced since i was a few months old so she hasn’t been in the pic for a while. even when she had custody of me jaksldf find me ron howard i’ll give him the rights to my life story

015. how long have you known your closest friend?

2017: three years. 2020: we’re going on 6 years jaksdf i’ll be maid of honor in her wedding this year. i also have another friend that i failed to mention last time but we’ve been close for 9 years (jfc)

016. superpower you’d like to have?

2017: invisibility 2020: mind reading so i know who’s Fake jaklsdjf

017. celebrity you’d like to meet?

2017: john stamos ?? idk i never really thought about it. i’ve met michael phelps though!! 2020: ig i’ll stick with stamos?? ooh or steve carrell or jennifer aniston. 

018. guilty pleasures

2017: chocolate and french fries. i love love love french fries. 2020: now my guilty pleasure is dr. pepper bc i cut it out of my diet.

019. pet peeves

2017: mouth noises (misophonia). people talking over each other and not listeninG. lowkey people leaving the toilet seat up or leaving toilet paper in the toilet like…just flush again. 2020: i really went off on tp huh?? another pet peeve is people committing to something then backing out/flaking without a heads up

020. do you have any hobbies?

2017: sports !!! i’m a grade a heaux for sports. tennis, archery, golf. anything that doesn’t require lots of muscle ya feel. one of my ~hobbies~ i guess is organizing things. i have multiple planners and use them all daily. 2020: i miss how sporty n active i was jkasdf this is my hobby.

021. where would you like to live in the future?

2017: i would looooooove to live in san diego but i’ll probs be stuck in the desert drylands. 2020: tbh i was looking into memphis homes bc it’s cheap compared to here but i don’t really care where i end up. just want a place of my own yknow

022. tell us a story about a thing that recently happened to you! it can be a funny, scary, sad story, your pick!

2017: redacted bc it was college angst lmao and not pretty 2020: i found out this morning that my cell phone # is somehow linked to some random guy a few miles away and idk how to fix it online. got some texts today and yesterday this one guy called me 6 times back to back while i was on the phone with someone else. i guess that’s another pet peeve of mine, pls leave a message if it’s important jaklsdf

[joannaofportugal]

JOANNA DE BRAGANZA / / CHALLENGE 004 

eleven tests completed & eleven explainations wrote out. 

SOUL TYPE TEST | the sage

A Sage soul is one whose role in life is collective expression, communicating big ideas with as many as possible. Natural extraverts, playful expression is fundamental to the Sage’s nature, though they are more adept at entertaining an audience than in coming up with original ideas. They are born attention-seekers, very much at home in front of an audience, taking centre stage. The bigger the audience the better, but any audience will do. The natural goal of any Sage is to express the highs and lows of life for all to see, sharing lifes lessons in an appealing way to create shared understanding. All soul types can manifest positively or negatively in any given moment, as the individual chooses. When manifesting negatively, Sages lapse into ORATION, i.e. hogging the spotlight, loving the sound of their own voice. The positive manifestation is COMMUNICATION, being on the same wavelength as the audience. Famous Sages include Mae West, Oscar Wilde, Bill Clinton, Jim Carrey

NOTE: reading through the soul type was very on-par with joanna’s very person, i would class her as a YOUNG SAGE who chases fame as nowdays celebraties do. she hogs the spotlight, the loves the sound of her own voice - what else could she be? 

MBTI TEST : entp-a ( the debater )

The Debater personality type is the ultimate devil’s advocate, thriving on the process of shredding arguments and beliefs and letting the ribbons drift in the wind for all to see. Debaters don’t do this because they are trying to achieve some deeper purpose or strategic goal, but for the simple reason that it’s fun. No one loves the process of mental sparring more than Debaters, as it gives them a chance to exercise their effortlessly quick wit, broad accumulated knowledge base, and capacity for connecting disparate ideas to prove their points.

NOTE: i was surprised, i thought her mbti would come out as something a little more dramatic rather than chasing knowledge or logic in it’s most intense form. i’m not too agreeing with the result, but maybe i can use this information to strengthen her person - and i like the ‘devil’s advocate’ side to it. 

CREEPIEST THING ABOUT YOU TEST: your possessiveness is really uncomfortable

It’s obvious to everyone around you that you feel the need to keep everything just the way you like it, and that insistence often borders on obsession. Your persistence, materialism, and sentimentality can prevent you from ever letting things go, and the more you care about them, the more stubbornly you defend your right to own them forever. Sorry to say, but there are some things, like memories and loved ones, you simply can’t own, and trying to stake your claim over them just makes you seem unbalanced and creepy. It probably wouldn’t hurt to quit being such a hoarder, too - none of your guests enjoy trying to find a seat in a room piled high with reminders of everything you refuse to let die.

NOTE: this is quite onbrand but wouldn’t be the creepiest thing to me when it comes to joanna - though she is posessive i don’t agree that it’s overwhelmingly disgusting.. i’d say it’s her rudest, or need to be right all the time.

TEMPERAMENTS TEST: sanguine 23/24 choleric 18/24 melancholic 05/24 phlegmatic 05/24

Your temperament is sanguine. The sanguine temperament is fundamentally spontaneous and pleasure-seeking; sanguine people are sociable and charismatic. They tend to enjoy social gatherings, making new friends and tend to be boisterous. They are usually quite creative and often daydream. However, some alone time is crucial for those of this temperament. Sanguine can also mean sensitive, compassionate and thoughtful. Sanguine personalities generally struggle with following tasks all the way through, are chronically late, and tend to be forgetful and sometimes a little sarcastic. Often, when they pursue a new hobby, they lose interest as soon as it ceases to be engaging or fun. They are very much people persons. They are talkative and not shy. Sanguines generally have an almost shameless nature, certain that what they are doing is right. They have no lack of confidence.

NOTE: this is a much easier answer for me to digest, though joanna isn’t evil she certaily has a rudness that can come across as evil to some people - or perhaps she truly is just a bully. and the last quote, ‘they havae no last of confidence’ is right on the target! though of course, as a young girl there may be bouts of insecurity.. which may evolve into humility or down-right foolery. 

LAWFUL ALIGNMENT TEST: chaotic neutral

A chaotic neutral character follows his whims. He is an individualist first and last. He values his own liberty but doesn't strive to protect others' freedom. He avoids authority, resents restrictions, and challenges traditions. A chaotic neutral character does not intentionally disrupt organizations as part of a campaign of anarchy. To do so, he would have to be motivated either by good (and a desire to liberate others) or evil (and a desire to make those different from himself suffer). A chaotic neutral character may be unpredictable, but his behavior is not totally random. He is not as likely to jump off a bridge as to cross it.

NOTE: in terms of alignment i think this is the safest option to describe joanna, she is no hero but she is no villain either.. she looks out for herself more than anthing else, though most choices come at random and at various paces.

GREEK DIETY TEST: poseidon

He was god of the Sea and other waters; of earthquakes; and of horses. In pre-Olympian Bronze Age Greece, he was venerated as a chief deity at Pylos and Thebes. Poseidon was protector of seafarers, and of many Hellenic cities and colonies. He is noble and powerful, and is recognized as a figure of leadership.

NOTE: like what happened when i took the same quiz for marius, i lost my first results. my first was aphrodite, which i didn’t necessarily agree with - then came poseidon. i’m happier with this result because poseidon was such a crass and awful man who made hell a lot worse than hades ever could’ve - he killed many whilst at sea, and in my opinion, was one of the most powerful gods of greek mythology. 

ENNEAGRAM TEST: type 7 / 7w8 ( the enthusiast )

People of this personality type are essentially concerned that their lives be an exciting adventure. Sevens are future oriented, restless people who are generally convinced that something better is just around the corner. They are quick thinkers who have a great deal of energy and who make lots of plans. They tend to be extroverted, multi-talented, creative and open minded. They are enthusiasts who enjoy the pleasures of the senses and who don't believe in any form of self-denial.

NOTE: she is certainly a pleasure seeker and planner for distraction and i think this is the closest i’d get to describing joanna though i wouldn’t call her creative due to the fact that she has little skill to anything!

SEXUALITY TEST: 40% heterosexual 30% bisexual 20% asexual 10% homosexual

this needs no description though i will write that of course she hasn’t had sex with anyone yet due to her position? it would be wrong for her to do that as a princess and thus has not experimented with anyone either than taking a few kisses from princes and noblemen. also, she has yet to be awoken to the sense that being attracted to girls is normal, so this quiz is entirely random to the point that it’s made for modern day human beings, not ones from 1455. 

POKEMON TEST: flying type

The Flying type is all about the self. You possess traits that are often sought-after: Confidence, self-respect, and bravery radiate from your being. You are a very self-aware individual, and that knowledge can be employed to great use both alone and socially. Remember, however, to not get too big of a head, Flying-type: Your confidence is good, but empathy is better. Often, you may find yourself at the whimsy of society. You are honorable, but also constantly worried about your self-image remaining pristine. If you allow yourself to become too wrapped up in what others think of you, you may become too flighty and scattered for your own good. Remember to relax, and let your spirit soar!

NOTE: though i find it hard to relate joanna to a pokemon the description is pretty good and i can fit joanna into it - though i’d rather see her as a spoilt and messy jigglypuff. 

TEA TYPE: hibiscus tea

You’re a *lot*. But that’s not a bad thing! You’re unafraid to take up space and make your voice heard. You love being the center of attention and are willing to cause a scene to swivel the spotlight toward you. You’ve got a sharp tongue (you’ve probably been called sassy at least once in your life) and you can use that for good or evil. Your tartness might not be for everyone, but those who get you love your larger-than-life presence.

NOTE: once again it’s pretty lose to joanna’s character and i particaly like the line ‘your tartness might not be for everyone’ 

BIG FIVE PERSONALITY: 

of course i wasn’t going to pay for this quiz so i only have a little information to share: OPENNESS 52% CONSIENTIOUSNESS 10% EXTRAVERSION 100% AGREEABLENESS 21% NEUROTICISM 33%

NOTE: extraversion is a funny one, and i really like the look of this type of quiz but alas i’m poor and i’m not gonna spend money on a made up character! 

and as i did with marius i ended up making a birth chat for her, who was born 29th may, 1438 at 17:39am. 

[durifmdarchived]

[ spotify link ! ]

where it’s sweet is part two to duri’s summer playlist. in the summer, he chooses songs that are a lot more upbeat over the songs that he chooses to listen in the colder months; which are more healing than these upbeat ones. he’s always felt like summer should be really fun, a time to really get yourself moving. a little bit of a pep in your step as the sun beats down upon your face in the city where it’s sweet. these are more of his summer song choices. 

001. bounce back ⏤ little mix.         ↳ he say that i'm the girl up in his dreams (dreams.) hot boy, better give me what I need (what I need.) wear me on his body like a throwback (throwback) and he better not move when i throw it back (throw it back.) baby, keep me wetter than a bayou (bayou) if you don't, I'ma walk right by you (baby, touch me, tease me, keep it easy.) 002. boogie up ⏤ wjsn.        ↳ how will we do it? it's simple. try it! like this hey! Shake that boogie up! shake shake that boogie up! do not think. shake it off. a little more exciting. turn it up. make it party boom make it party boom boom. 003. cool for the summer ⏤ demi lovato.        ↳ ooh ooh, take me down into your paradise. don't be scared 'cause i'm your body type just something that we wanna try 'cause you and i,  we're cool for the summer. 004. super bass ⏤ nicki minaj.       ↳ this one is for the boys with the booming system. top down, ac with the cooler system. when he come up in the club, he be blazin' up. got stacks on deck like he savin' up and he ill, he real, he might gotta deal. he pop bottles and he got the right kind of build. he cold, he dope, he might sell coke. he always in the air, but he never fly coach. he a motherfuckin' trip, trip, sailor of the ship, ship. 005. teenage dream ⏤ katy perry.      ↳ before you met me i was alright but things were kinda heavy. you brought me to life. now every february you'll be my valentine, valentine. let's go all the way tonight. no regrets, just love. we can dance until we die. you and i, we'll be young forever. 006. wave ⏤ ateez.      ↳ cheers, cheers under the hot sun right now. go away, go away throw away all hesitation, throw away all hesitation. think, think, think we’ve already overcome so much. remember, remember, remember time keeps passing. 007. can’t help myself ⏤ eric nam ft loco maverick kwon ft ??.      ↳ wanna be with you, you tonight, yeah. no more playin’ cool, cool, you and i. drench my thirsty heart all right, breathe air into me, my life. without you, there’s no meaning. accept me, let me love you. 008. that summer (second story) ⏤ infinite decipher.     ↳ do you remember that night? the day we met? even though I was drenched and running , because I was with you, I liked it. up in the blindingly shiny sky, all the stars were pouring on you (so you.) i saw only you, at that time I was drenched in you.  009. summer kiss ⏤ clc 7rophy.     ↳ like the ocean, like the sky. like the ocean, like the sky. do you remember the sound of the waves? the summer night we spent holding hands? we looked at the stars in the sky and promised that we’ll never change. 010. love u ⏤ chungha.     ↳  wanna fall into your deep brown eyes. i wanna place it in me secretly. (i really want it) i’m not afraid anymore. in my heart, you’re not a friend. you know this, you feel the same. it’s too early to call this a start yet. so come closer, come closer. 011. snapping ⏤ chungha.    ↳ on your way home, drop me off. lightly, take it off push me away before the night is over. snapping snapping, trying to close my eyes. snapping snapping, throwing away my tired heart with twisted movements. even if i steal you for a moment. snapping snapping I’ll let you go. 012. replay ⏤ iyaz.    ↳  na na na na everyday it's like my ipod's stuck on replay, replay-ay-ay-ay. shawty's like a melody in my head that i can't keep out.  got me singin' like na na na na everyday. it's like my ipod's stuck on replay, replay. 013. you’re the best ⏤ mamamoo.    ↳ hey you, guy with the pretty smile. youuuu ahhhh, you are a man that makes me go crazy.  you steal looks with your body and face. hey mr you, guy with handsome thoughts. youuuu ahhhh,  i’m confused because of you. please someone stop me. 014. love bomb ⏤ fromis_9.     ↳ like this, like this your heart yeah. i aim at it, i aim at it p-p-p-p-pow. nice what’s so hard about it? commit to it, ha ha ha yeah. all night it’s a p-p-partyIn your unusual dream (woo.) right when you meet me it explodes boom. something different, feels like zoom zoom zoom.