#*aware. Scouting: Bad Internationalism

[chicago-geniza]

Hey @horrid-little-pedant I can make you a Boy Scouts/international Scouting movement imperialism/colonialism/not-so-crypto-fascism syllabus if you’d like but for a first tantalizing taste here is:

Fig 1) Robert Baden-Powell, founder of the Boy Scouts and the Scouting movement, on the swastika symbol, from his 1917 sequel to the classic manual Scouting For Boys, entitled Young Knights of The Empire. Its companion book, for Girl Guides/Girl Scouts, authored by his sister Agnes, was called How Girls Can Help Build Up the Empire. The Baden-Powell family, prominent British military aristocrats, were instrumental in the British colonial expansion re: South Africa. Baden-Powell’s inspiration for the Boy Scouts was the Mafeking Cadet Corps, a group of child soldiers formed by Lord Edward Cecil shortly before the Siege of Mafeking that secured Robert’s place in annals of imperial military history. His niece Betty later became--I am choking and wheezing and coughing up a hairball getting this phrase out--Scoutmaster for the. Girl Guides of North Rhodesia. Do not even get me STARTED on, uh. The Peace Light of Bethlehem (tl;dr it’s a program inaugurated in Austria circa 1986 nominally to help ~handicapped children, but of course. In 2005. The International Commissioner of Austria symbolically passed the Peace Light to a delegation of Scouts and Guides from the Palestinian National Authority, comma, just after the Oslo Accords. And then in 2007 a delegation of Guides and Scouts from Austria, Germany, France, Jordan, Israel, and the PNA--by the way, all but Jordan and Israel are part of the Catholic international Scouting branch that generally, depending on region, ‘pledges allegiance’ to “[country], God, Church, and Christian Europe”--they symbolically lit the ~*~Peace Light together. In. Bethlehem. Scouting is the most fucked-up Bad Internationalism movement in the world.)

Fig 2) The Rodlo symbol was designed by a woman who was part of the Polish minority population in Germany, she went to a Sokol (also Scouting!!!) gymnasium, she got a scholarship to study with Wladyslaw Skyoczylas and other modernist naive folk-revival painters at the school of fine arts in Warsaw, she survived the war, she got into this bizarre movement of neo-pagan anti-clerical pan-Slavist ‘nationalism’ that confirms every single thing I said in my undergrad thesis, she wants to take these symbols back from Hitler and stress the uniqueness of the Polish-German border regions that are neither like, fashy Catholic nationalist Poland nor fashy-flavor Germany, unfortunately that’s not how history or visual semantics work. She says it’s ‘rod’ plus ‘godlo’ (pretend it’s a liquid l) but it’s rodnoverie, we know what you’re about, Joasia--or rather, if you have to give a paragraph-long disclaimer every time you present your lovingly-rendered symbol, you gotta just let it go once it reaches critical mass and recognize that that your defensive disclaimers come across as “my t-shirt is raising a lot of questions that are answered by the shirt.” Anyway. This Harcerstwo troupe named after...the Harcerstwo movement that became a WWII paramilitary and subsequently Catholic anticommunist movement adopted it as their symbol. They’re from a small town in the Katowice region and they are. Well. If you don’t want everyone to think you’re fascists then maybe don’t be a paramilitary organization with a Hitler Youth lite flag (if you put the Rodlo on the Polish flag...it’s...it scans as the swastika on the...they know! They’re not oblivious, they do 500 WWII memorial actions per year!). And don’t have your scouts swear fealty in military fatigues while doing the seig heil to the Slavic Hitlerjugend flag in the woods. Ya dig. Their website is like “why are our enrollments declining :(” 

idk man maybe your town’s teens want to smoke weed under the bridge and not be put through boot camp after school 

[carter-rome]

𝐏𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲.

Good personality traits:  Adaptable, Adventurous, Pensive and Courteous, Diplomatic, Curious, Generous, Nurturing, Sensual, Patient, Easygoing, Affectionate & Organised. Always in awe. 

Good personality traits:  Adaptable, Adventurous, Pensive and Courteous, Diplomatic, Curious, Generous, Nurturing, Sensual, Patient, Easygoing, Affectionate & Organised. Always in awe. 

Bad personality traits: Cynical, Materialistic, Prying, Rowdy, Superstitious, Mischievous, Impulsive, Workaholic yet also Self Indulgent at the same time. His sense of humor is akin to that of a 68 year old man’s kneecaps, loose and perhaps borderline broken.

Hobbies:  Cooking & Baking, Travelling, Cycling, Afternoon walks by the Han River, Sailing, Skiing, Watching Films, Scouting vintage stores for interesting finds. Dancing in the rain and taking naps during a thunderstorm. Listening to ambient music. 

Carter is most at ease when he’s in his own company, brainstorming new pastries and seasonal drinks. He finds it easier to breathe when nobody is around to claim assumptions about him. He peruses through life at his own pace, and has grown comfortable of being present with himself. As a result, Carter grew to be fiercely independent, and has a strong sense of self. He is a nomad, and views himself as something people encounter briefly, get accustomed to then tuck away as time goes on. It is reflected in his past relationships, each failed ending with their own nuance to tell.

At first, it was a hard spill to swallow, but Carter seems to have developed some acceptance to the reality that to a lot of people, he is merely that, and maybe — maybe that was okay. However, on some days, the nagging idea comes back to remind him, and sometimes, it prods, sometimes, it floods the chamber that sits nicely in the cavity of his chest. Making it swell — too full that it almost threatens to burst. 

He wonders about meeting someone — people, keen enough to want to understand him for what he is like he constantly strives to do so with others.  He is most enraged when he disappoints himself. Carter directs most of his anger towards himself rather than others. He keeps this private, and comes with being strongly independent. 

He is someone that likes to test his limits, and he continuously challenges himself in the path to self improvement. He is acutely aware that mistakes and disappointments are a part of life, but at times, when he falls flat against the standards he sets himself, even though these moments are fleeting and shortly subside, he can be incredibly harsh to himself. 

Carter is tender-hearted and sentimental in some ways despite how he comes across at first glance. Upon first impressions, he seems superficial, but Carter is easily stirred by things, by people he meets and stories he hears on a daily basis, and uses them as muses. His philosophy is finding the beauty in the mundane, and expressing awe and love to it through food. Thus, Carter’s process when creating new desserts takes time because he is incredibly meticulous, and he is heavily motivated by his desire to inspire wonder and love in others through the senses. Perhaps this is his greatest vulnerability — his food, as he pours parts of him into the creations he fashions by his own hands. 

His dedication to his work garnered him a lot of attention and praise nationally, and internationally. In such a short span of time, New Java became a highly sought out cafe in Seoul because of its ever changing theme and special menu. Attracting a flurry of locals and tourists as well as celebrities. Carter is a growing figure within the pastry community, and has had a very successful start to his career.

Physical appearance: Weight: 70kg Height: 187cm (6’1) Eye color: Brown Skin tone: Tanned Distinguishing marks: N/A Predominant features: Prominent cheekbones and broad shoulders with sharp brows.  Hair color: Dark brown Voice: Warm Baritone Usual fashion of dress: Comfortable, Smart/Casual, Street/Sporty, Dark to Warm Neutral Colours Jewelry or accessories: Wears a necklace given to him by his parents when he left for Seoul at 18.

[btsarmystan]

There are some Youtubers just talking lies and misleading information all the time. They spread misleading things and lies about BTS members just for clout and clickbait. They even normalize the use of sensitive words towards the members especially to Jimin on their Youtube channels. It actually just accentuates the spread of malicious comments towards any of the BTS members. I knew that over the course of BTS' career, Jimin has always fought to achieve perfection on himself, be it performance or his body image. He has been striving to achieve skinny physique, particularly on the group's breakthrough music video "Blood, Sweat & Tears". Jimin wanted to look sharper and hotter on the music video so he would only eat a meal in 10 days. But he eventually stopped because it was detrimental to his health and he passed out during dance practice. Jin saw that and strongly advised him to stop that. We ARMYs definitely see the struggles, pain and stress behind Jimin himself.

However, lately, we have seen more malicious comments that are directed towards Jimin, making offensive and malicious jokes about his dieting routine and some other things, which are beyond disrespectful to the artist. I would not even mention it here. Thank you to Jimin.Bangtan on Facebook here to inform us ARMYs about the disinformation spread by some so-called influencers on social media. They ain't fans and supporters. They just want to grab that piece of pizza. They are doing that for money. We have to be aware that even though we always see the glorious and glamorous side of these Kpop megastars, but we never deeply understand and know what they have been going through inside themselves, off-camera or even before their rise of fame in real life. If you are a die-hard Kpop stan or a BTS stan, you would know how much anxiety, pain and stress in a certain degree that they have been enduring since their debut day. (In this situation, I mean for any Kpop groups, not just BTS.)There are lots of things hidden behind cameras that we would never know until they are revealed by other trust-worthy media or the artists themselves.

Hearing through the grapevine that Jimin actually have seen some of these malicious comments on social media, is actually really heartbreaking to see. I don't know how and what he reacted to that, but I would say that he would just simply brush them off and continue with his work. This is the reason why recently Big Hit has decided to take legal action for BTS and TXT regarding malicious comments to safeguard their own artists. I'm actually glad that Big Hit has taken such action because these kind of behaviors have just gotten out of hand lately. The members definitely have their dark sides. Remembering Jimin talking about his single 'Promise' being a pretty dark piece before the revamp of the song with RM is no shocking to me. I am saying this because I did lots of research on Kpop industry and the members themselves. The time that Jimin wrote the song was probably the time that the boys did not know whether they can still continue to work as a group together or disband. It was probably the time before 2015. It was before the time that they get "big" locally and internationally. It was the unknown time for them and for the group. Even if you get the chance to debut, you still have to make it and become famous & popular. That's the hardest part of it.

BTS has bought loads of positivity and encouragement to the world throughout their career, and especially during COVID, in this difficult time. How come people just can't do the same thing and share love to the members? Just one simple thing, love for one another, within the fandom itself, and to the artists as well. BTS stands for Bulletproof Boy Scouts. We all know that the members are so great at shaking off any hatreds, negative and malevolent comments or behaviors towards them. Their countless number of accolades and their achievements speak louder than those critics and negativities.

As the members always sings in their song, "We Are Bulletproof: The Eternal"

We are bullet-bullet-bulletproof

We faced the negative looks and did it

Bad memories, numerous trials

We bravely blocked them all, bulletproof

As we all know,

Life goes on, Let's live on.

Jimin,

you are perfect and you do deserve more, just shake those haters off your mind. I am sure you will be fine.

You are perfect. Stay gold, baby.

[thecomicsnexus]

NEW TEEN TITANS: DRUG ABUSE AWARENESS (KEEBLER/NSDA) 1983 BY MARV WOLFMAN, GEORGE PEREZ, ROSS ANDRU, DICK GIORDANO, ADRIENNE ROY, JOE GIELLA

SYNOPSIS

These are two of at least three drug abuse awareness specials that came out in 1983.

The first one involves Speedy (a rehabilitated drug addict), helping the Titans (with the help of the Robin look-alike, The Protector). They try to dismantle a drug dealing operation that is affecting the youth.

The second story is pretty much the same, but is more focused on regular kids.

THE PROTECTOR

That is not Nightwing, nor Robin. So who is the Protector? DC FANDOM answers...

Jason Hart was a student that went to a normal high school; he was a good student and good in sports. Everything was okay until the day that he discovered that his little cousin named Ted had tried drugs and apparently he was quickly becoming an addict.

Jason Hart would tell his family about this in an attempt to to get Ted off drugs. Although the family talked to Ted, he did not care about what they said.

Jason Hart remembered that his little cousin was obsessed with comic books, so he took a hero costume and the codename of the "Protector". Hart hoped that as a superhero Ted would listen to him and quit drugs.

However the Protector was forced to battle drug dealers to save his cousin. Soon after that, Nightwing learned about this incident and decided to make Jason Hart an honorary member of the Teen Titans due to his great sense of right and wrong and how he defended the innocents from the criminals. Nightwing didn't stop there though, he also decided to train Jason in terms of hand to hand combat to make him able to become a real superhero if he wanted.

So that is who he is, but why was he in this story and not Robin. Well, it turns out Batfamily characters were licensed to Nabisco. Because these comic boks were sponsored by three companies (Keebler, NSDA and IBM), they couldn’t use the character, and thus, The Protector was created (he was recently killed by Tom King in Heroes in Crisis, just in case you were wondering what happened to him).

CONTEXT

If you were around in the eighties you may remember the catchphrase “Just say no”. This was Nancy Reagan’s pet project, as Wikipedia enlightens us:

The campaign emerged from a substance abuse prevention program supported by the National Institutes of Health, pioneered in the 1970s by University of Houston Social Psychology Professor Richard I. Evans. Evans promoted a social inoculation model, which included teaching student skills to resist peer pressure and other social influences. The campaign involved University projects done by students across the nation. Jordan Zimmerman, then a student at USF, and later an advertising entrepreneur, won the campaign. The anti-drug movement was among the resistance skills recommended in response to low peer pressure, and Nancy Reagan's larger campaign proved to be a useful dissemination of this social inoculation strategy.

Nancy Reagan first became involved during a campaign trip in 1980 to Daytop Village, New York. She recalls feeling impressed by a need to educate the youth about drugs and drug abuse. Upon her husband's election to the presidency, she returned to Daytop Village and outlined how she wished to help educate the youth. She stated in 1981 that her best role would be to bring awareness about the dangers of drug abuse:

Understanding what drugs can do to your children, understanding peer pressure and understanding why they turn to drugs is ... the first step in solving the problem.

The "Just Say No" slogan was the creation of Robert Cox and David Cantor, advertising executives at the New York office of Needham, Harper & Steers/USA in the early 1980s.

In 1982, the phrase "Just Say No" first emerged when Nancy Reagan was visiting Longfellow Elementary School in Oakland, California. When asked by a schoolgirl what to do if she was offered drugs, the First Lady responded: "Just say no." Just Say No club organizations within schools and school-run anti-drug programs soon became common, in which young people were making pacts not to experiment with drugs.

When asked about her efforts in the campaign, Nancy Reagan said: "If you can save just one child, it's worth it." She traveled throughout the United States and several other nations, totaling over 250,000 miles (400,000 km). Nancy Reagan visited drug rehabilitation centers and abuse prevention programs; with the media attention that the first lady receives, she appeared on television talk shows, recorded public service announcements, and wrote guest articles. By the autumn of 1985, she had appeared on 23 talk shows, co-hosted an October 1983 episode of Good Morning America, and starred in a two-hour PBS documentary on drug abuse.

The campaign and the phrase "Just Say No" made their way into popular American culture when TV shows like Diff'rent Strokes and Punky Brewster produced episodes centered on the campaign. In 1983, Nancy Reagan appeared as herself in the television programs Dynasty and Diff'rent Strokes to garner support for the anti-drug campaign. She participated in a 1985 rock music video "Stop the Madness" as well. La Toya Jackson became spokesperson for the campaign in 1987 and recorded a song titled "Just Say No" with British hit producers Stock/Aitken/Waterman.

In 1985, Nancy Reagan expanded the campaign internationally. She invited the First Ladies of thirty various nations to the White House in Washington, D.C. for a conference entitled the "First Ladies Conference on Drug Abuse". She later became the first First Lady invited to address the United Nations.

She enlisted the help of the Girl Scouts of the United States of America, Kiwanis Club International, and the National Federation of Parents for a Drug-Free Youth to promote the cause; the Kiwanis put up over 2000 billboards with Nancy Reagan's likeness and the slogan. Over 5000 Just Say No clubs were founded in schools and youth organizations in the United States and abroad. Many clubs and organizations remain in operation around the country, where they aim to educate children and teenagers about the effects of drugs.

Just Say No crossed over to the United Kingdom in the 1980s, where it was popularized by the BBC's 1986 "Drugwatch" campaign, which revolved around a heroin-addiction storyline in the popular children's TV drama serial Grange Hill. The cast's cover of the original U.S. campaign song, with an added rap, reached the UK top ten. The death of Anna Wood in Sydney, Australia and British teen Leah Betts from Essex in the mid-1990s sparked a media firestorm across both the UK and Australia over the use of illegal drugs. Wood's parents even released her school photograph on a badge with the saying "Just say no to drugs" placed on it to warn society on the dangers of illicit drug use. The photograph was widely circulated in the media. A photo of Betts in a coma in her hospital bed was also circulated in British media. Both teenagers died due to water intoxication as they drank too much water after ingesting ecstasy.

Nancy Reagan's related efforts increased public awareness of drug use, but a direct relationship between reduced drug use and the Just Say No campaign cannot be established. Although the use and abuse of illegal recreational drugs significantly declined during the Reagan presidency, this may be a spurious correlation: a 2009 analysis of 20 controlled studies on enrollment in one of the most popular "Just Say No" programs, DARE, showed no effect on drug use.

The campaign did draw some criticism. Nancy Reagan's approach to promoting drug awareness was labeled simplistic by critics who argued that the solution was reduced to a catch phrase. In fact, two studies suggested that enrollees in DARE-like programs were actually more likely to use alcohol and cigarettes. Critics have also suggested that inflamed fears from "Just Say No" exacerbated mass incarceration and prevented youth from receiving accurate information about dealing with drug abuse. Critics also think that "Just Say No" contributed towards the well seasoned stigma about people who use drugs being labelled as "bad", and the stigma toward those people who are addicted to drugs being labelled as making a cognizant amoral choice to engage in drug use.

REVIEW

I know there are at least three specials, not numbered, and there also seem to be an alternate cover to the second special (the one here has a label that says DC COMICS over the original text (American Soft Drink Industry). This makes me think that it was reprinted.

Of the three I only got to read the first two, but I understand they lose quality as you keep reading them.

The first special is actually good for what it is. The Protector is a bit distracting, but having Speedy there added some legitimacy to the story. I do not think the story is better than the Green Lantern story where he was revealed an addict (even if the solution is a bit magical over there).

The second special is probably where they lost readers. The Titans are almost not there as the story is centered around the Protector’s cousin. It is a better example of peer pressure, but there are just too many bursts of information, sometimes in the unlikeliest moments.

I also feel that, at least in these two episodes, there is little mention of addiction being a lifetime sickness. They do talk about psychological dependency, but it is a bit vague why.

The first one is also drawn by George Perez. That is a big plus in my book, even if the other artist is Ross Andru.

On the second special it feels like Wolfman was trying to make sure certain bits of information were there even if they stopped the action. And in the first special there is too much repetition (some facts are duplicated during the confessionals and during the story).

But, if you compare this to the Famine relief books... these are much better. And to think they happened two years before those. Of course, there is one small difference: these books were sponsored and didn’t need the gimmick of having as many superstars in it as possible. And I suspect that may be the main reason why it doesn’t completely suck.

I give these books a score of 7

[lilydodge]

What are some good/bad portrayals of foster care in movies or tv?

This is part of a series for Foster Care Awareness Month, where I answer questions submitted via facebook or tumblr about my work as a therapeutic foster parent. Ask your own question here!

It’s honestly hard to come up with “good examples” - it’s really common to see foster care and adoption, as well as related issues like CPS and child abuse, used as punchlines. I wince now when a TV show has a one-liner about a character “having their kids taken away” that’s mocking or punches down - and it’s more common than you’d think. We’re coming around to realizing that certain types of humor, like racist and sexist humor, isn’t okay - but vulnerable youth are still not recognized as a marginalized group to be taken seriously. (For example, The Office and Silicon Valley both use a character’s traumatic childhood, including references to foster care, as a running gag.)

One good example I’ve seen is the movie Hunt for the Wilderpeople. Not because it’s “realistic” - it glosses over a lot of the bureaucratic reality of the foster care system - but it’s not a documentary, so that’s not a criticism. At its heart, it captures some really powerful truths about foster care. The fact that youth are often placed with foster parents who don’t entirely understand their complex needs; the fact that all foster youth are individuals who need and deserve to be understood and loved for who they are; the way that youth in care can be quite “old” and quite “young” for their age simultaneously; the fact that bonds between youth and adults are critically important but often don’t look like we expect. 

There are two moments in that film that really ring true to my experiences with foster care. Early in the movie, the social worker is telling the potential foster parents about Ricky, the young teen in foster care. She calls him “a real bad egg,” and lists some of his “behaviors.” While she’s talking, her voice is overlaid with video of the actual “behaviors.” She says “loitering,” and he’s just standing outside. She says “kicking stuff,” and he’s absentmindedly kicking at garbage on the street. Things like that. You can actually see this bit in the trailer. And this is SO TRUE. Youth in care are so pathologized and criminalized, their behavior is judged through a very negative lens, and they’re often blamed, shamed, punished, or even arrested for behavior that was understandable, provoked, necessary for survival, or just something minor that another youth would be supported through. 

Later in the movie, Ricky spouts off some very insightful “psycho-babble” in response to another character, despite the fact that he’s never displayed much interest or skills in therapeutic dialogue. These youth are often shuttled through lots of treatment programs, interventions, and even institutions, and they learn the lingo incredibly well. They’re very familiar with the ins and outs of the family law system, they will identify “maladaptive coping mechanisms” in the same deadpan they point out a poster for a movie they want to see, and they can tell you which juvenile facilities in the area serve the best pizza. Their experience leads to a sort of precociousness about the entire world of trauma treatment and foster care. 

It’s not technically about foster care, but I’d like to plug an honorable mention for Steven Universe, which does a great job depicting non-traditional families and parent/child relationships that don’t involve the parent living with or raising the child. Conflicts arise between the people raising Steven and his dad, and we see that everyone wants the best for Steven and is just working out their own issues. We also see Steven missing his mom without this changing or challenging his love for the people who are raising him, and we see Steven worrying about presenting his non-traditional family to a more traditional family. It also has an amazing portrayal of anxiety and mindfulness (Here Comes A Thought), and of the multifaceted impacts of trauma (in particular, Lapis’s storyline, as well as Pearl’s). 

Two shows that stand out in my mind as being terrible in this regard are Brooklyn-99 and Superstore. Now, I love Brooklyn-99, and in fact have watched it with one of my youth, who really relates to the main character - it deals with father/son trauma and complex families really well -  and he responds incredibly well to the show’s warmth and humanity. It’s been an amazing way for us to bond, and I consider the show a good tool in my “therapeutic parent” toolbox. But whenever it veers into this territory specifically, it fails. 

Brooklyn-99 does a lot of great work when talking about race, gender, gun violence, and other issues - but it whiffs every single time foster care, adoption, or child abuse is mentioned. The show makes light of child sexual abuse (mostly in veiled references to a boy scout camp leader or something like that), and a prison storyline made numerous jokes about a child predator. Charles Boyle adopts internationally, and the episode that centers around his son’s family of origin is a cringe-inducing 22 minutes of Problematic International Adoption Tropes. (Modern Family doesn’t do great with this as well, but its jokes are typically more ‘tone deaf’ than ‘offensive.’)

In Superstore, one of the main characters, Glenn, is an evangelical Christian who fosters, and the show addresses that in multiple episodes. Terribly. At one point, Glenn expresses interest in adopting an infant, referring to his foster youth as being like “dinged up” used cars. Another episode makes light of the fact that some of his foster youth are in jail, and also includes an example of “attachment therapy” where Glenn publicly shames the child, ignores him, and snaps at him. I was frankly amazed that there was someone out there who managed to know enough about “attachment therapy” to include it in an episode about foster youth, but not enough to try and represent it appropriately.

Those are the ones that come to mind right now. I haven’t seen Shazam, which I know centers on foster youth, but one of my youth did see it, and he enjoyed it. I also know that This Is Us and Parenthood tackle foster parenting, but I don’t tend to watch that sort of TV. I didn’t see Instant Family because one of the foster parenting groups I’m in was helping former foster youth organize a boycott of the movie. And very few foster parents who I respect like the movie The Blind Side. 

[melvinfellerstuff]

Melvin Feller MA Discusses Reasons Why Ants Can Set Better Goals Then We Can

Melvin Feller MA Discusses Reasons Why Ants Can Set Better Goals Then We Can

According to Melvin Feller most, entrepreneurs do not like to set like to goals.  Melvin Feller suggests that a smarter move would be to learn why ants have a better philosophy than the majority of us do.

 Reasons Why Ants Are Better Goal Setters than We Are!

 Ants follow proven instruction. When scout ants find food, they spray a pheromone and hightail it back to the nest. The pheromone makes a trail that leads back to the food. Worker Ants at the nest do not argue that there is a better way back to the food they just follow the trail.

  A human, though, will see a proven path to success and try to change it. They will think they see shortcuts and take those instead of the proven path.

 I read a report recently the success rate with franchises was higher if the owner did not have a high IQ. Why? Because the franchisees who were smart usually veer off the proven path. They change the working formula and in doing so mess up their own success.

 If you watch a scout ant, once he finds food he runs back to the nest, sometimes he gets excited and zigzags a little, he might even make a circle. When the other ants follow the trail do they say, “Hey we’re going in a circle? Let’s take this shortcut?” No! They follow the proven path back to the food. The result? Everyone gets the food.

 Ants are determined. If you tell, an ant there is food over a hill but there are five trees down blocking the path, does the ant think twice? No, an ant will climb a house 1000 times its size if it has to make its journey.

  This makes a person feel bad for putting down a manual because it has too many pages doesn’t it. Just think of the number of people who quit because the path is “too difficult,” too hard to follow. I face that a lot with the people I mentor on business marketing and setup.

“Melvin Feller, that book is 1800 pages long, you mean I have to know all of that?” They ask.

 What would an ant say? Would an ant ever say, “You know, now that you mention it, you’re right. I never thought about it that way. It is too hard. We might as well put that big book away and work at McDonalds.”

 Ants see defeat as only temporary. Every fall, as most dwellers do, I go to battle with ants coming into our house from the cold. In addition, although I love ant attitude, my archenemy is the ant. So I must exterminate. I have a service that sprays; I also throw out ant stop powder and use borax bait to kill off the colony.

 After a week or two, they are all gone. They have been defeated. Nevertheless, not so fast! What happens the next year? They come back in the same numbers!

 Is it not strange that they would come back? They lost. Why would an ant set 1 foot, let alone six tiny ant feet in my house? Because they see defeat as only temporary. They know eventually they will win. Truth is I know it too. One day, I will be gone, but generations of ants will still be back – until one day – possibly 2000 years from now, my house will be demolished and the ants will live here freely.

 Ants Collaborate better than Wall Street Executives. As I touched on before, when ants search for food, they set up markers along the way, letting other ants know where the food is. If the food happens to be an insect or grub, this trail is a call to action, they work together to conquer the bug or insect and then drag it back to the nest.

 Humans have the ability to collaborate as well. However, most do not do it very well. We are all out searching for our version of food, be it happiness, be it money, or health. Yet how many  people do we actively collaborate with daily? How many other people do you actively work on your goals with? One? Ten?

 An ant does not want to hear you are not collaborating with anyone. He would think you are crazy. He would say you are doing it the hard way.

 Napoleon Hill called collaboration the Mastermind formula. It is true. Two brains are better than one, three brains are better than 2. None of us knows it all. Yet, if we sit down together and give perspectives, we can help each other get what we want.

 An ant will not waste any time following the path that says “lots of food here!” Of course, he has to trust his comrades. However, that is what collaboration is all about. Learning different perspectives and forming relationships that profit all parties. It cannot be a 1-0 relationship. It has to be a 1 to 1 or 2-2 or 3 to 3 relationship where everyone’s needs are met.

 Ants defend what they have and expand it. Has anyone out there had the pleasure of stepping on a fire anthill barefooted? If you have made this mistake, you have seen firsthand how an ant will defend its colony. However, not only do they defend it. They are constantly expanding it. Both above and below ground, they build, build, and build.

  If the wind or a boot knocks over their house, they build it right back and continue expanding it.

 Yet, when it comes to humans, defending our homes in the form of insurance, paint and weatherproofing can feel like a major inconvenience. In addition, what about expanding your home? Making it better? What an inconvenience! Who wants to build a deck or add on a sunroom? That is too much work!

 Ants never let personalities get in the way. Now granted, Bob the ant may be a raging jerk at home, or perhaps he plays the ant equivalent to video games once the kids are in bed. But when Bob gets to work in the morning he’s all business.

  You never see Bob the ant wasting precious time gossiping about Mary the ant or the queen who passed you over for the Formica sanguine promotion. No, ants may well have their own personalities, but they leave that at home.

   One ant does not purposefully stab another in the back just to get ahead. Another ant does not steal food from the rest to hoard it all to himself.

 Ants adopt at a primal level the old saying “There’s a time for work and a time for play.” They never get the two confused. When they are at work, they work; non-stop until it’s time for rest, then they rest.

 Ants never spend their whole paycheck. Ants are acutely aware that a storm is coming; winter is on the horizon or the possibility of a lawn mower in the area. That is not to be negative, in every life a little rain must fall. To think you will never have a setback is dumb. We all have setbacks.

 Ants, know they will have setbacks too. So what do they do? They prepare for them. They do not simply find enough food for one week and then eat it all until the next week. No, they eat some and save some. Yet, something like 30% of the American population lives paycheck to paycheck!

  Instead of saving a bit out of each check, people spend it all. You can almost hear them say, “If something bad happens, I’ll deal with it then.” Again, not to be negative, but setbacks will happen. Accidents happen, winters come, floods take out houses, businesses downsize. You do not have to dwell upon these facts, but you need to prepare yourself for them in case they do happen. If they do not occur, then hey! You have got extra in your savings account.

  Ants would never think to blow it all in a week’s time. They scrimp and save for the tougher times.

 Ants expect more from themselves than should be possible. Have you ever seen an ant carrying a leaf or a stick 20 times its size? Sometimes you can catch two or three of them carrying a caterpillar and it looks like the caterpillar is floating on air.

  Why would an ant ever believe that it is possible to carry so much? Well one reason is ants brains are not so big, but the other is they are born without negative limits.

 Humans, as a whole, give in to mental limits all the time. We do not lift 10 times our weight because we either believe we cannot or never made it a focus.

 I read in Men’s health last week that some bodybuilders are bench-pressing over 1000 pounds. That is an incredible feat isn’t it? However, one reason these people can do that is they did not limit themselves to 100, 200 or even 500 pounds.

 We have examples all around us of people who have severe handicaps, or who come from poor or abusive backgrounds, yet are able to “overcome” and achieve their life dreams.

 How is that possible?

  One reason is they do not believe the limits in their physical makeup or background and upbringing. They expect more from themselves than should be possible. They know they are better than to set the ceiling so low.

  Ants remain focused until they succeed. Have you ever seen an ant who is building its anthill suddenly stop what he is doing and then buy a lottery ticket? No, of course not! Why? Because ants stay focused on what they are doing until they succeed.

 When ants are working, they do not take sudden detours. They do not quit halfway through playing World of Warcraft. They pick up one rock, carry it where it needs to go and place it there. He picks up the next rock and does the same, and so on until he finishes his work.

 If you can focus like an ant on your progress, brick by brick, stone by stone, you can’t help but be successful.

 Ants never give up. The typical human is easily discouraged. For some people not all it takes is one “any” and that’s the end. If he is working on a goal and you say “no” that is usually the end. He will take that as the final word and stop trying. Isn’t that sad? If you said no to an ant, he would simply find another way. You can step on them, spray poison, burn them with magnifying glasses but still they never give up.

Never give up!

  Melvin Feller is known as “The Entrepreneur’s Mentor” because Melvin walks his talk. Melvin Feller has been there and done that and more importantly, Melvin Feller knows how to transfer the skill set for success.  This is main reason that he has been the sought after coach to hundreds of small business owners, entrepreneurs, Realtors, real estate investors and service professional internationally. Melvin Feller’s main talent is to show you how the step by step process to build and enjoy a successful 6-figure plus business while having a balanced life.  Melvin Feller maintains offices in Texas and Oklahoma.  

Melvin Feller MA is in Texas and in Oklahoma. Melvin Feller founded Melvin Feller Business Group in the 1970s to help individuals and organizations achieve their specific Victory. Victory as defined by the individual or organization are achieving strategic objectives, exceeding goals, getting results or desired outcomes. He has extensive experience assisting businesses achieve top and bottom line results. He has broad practical experience creating WINNERS in many organizations and industries. He has hands-on experience in executive leadership, operations, logistics, sales, program management, organizational development, training, and customer service. He has coached teams to achieve results in strategic planning, business development, organizational design, sales, and customer response and business process improvement. He has prepared and presented many workshops nationally and internationally.

[beyondthefloor]

Dear Parent,

Dear Parent,

Your kid joined a high level, nationally competitive program. You had to sign a fucking 16 page membership manual and commitment contract in order to even get the kid to participate - and you just signed that motherfucker without reading it, didn’t you? It’s okay, I’ll give you the crash course: Why yes, I do look young to be a coach. In fact, I am young. Shut the fuck up about that and look at my results. I’m 100% more qualified to be your kids coach than you are at doing whatever you do for a living. I bet you didn’t compete internationally and gain relative fame in human resources, Karen. How many national championships has your accounting department won under your direction, Steve? None? Weird. I bet you can’t even motivate them to clean out the coffee pot at the end of the day. You don’t know shit about what makes a good coach. I don’t want to hear your idea. You literally have no fucking idea what you’re talking about. Don’t email me your suggestion for new team apparel or for a fun new training exercise for us to do. This isn’t girl scouts where the moms can participate as troop leaders and pretend they have superior knowledge about birdseed or some shit. You’re wasting my time. You know why I don’t work with children? Because I hate children. You might enjoy this weird “my kid is a teenager but also just a BABY” thing because you have an undiagnosed mental problem, but some of us are trying to teach your teenager fundamental adult life skills. You can cling to a photo album at home or something - stop getting in my fucking way. When I say the student has to email me if they can’t be at rehearsal, I mean the student. That’s the one who’s younger and attends high school. When I send them a disciplinary email for the sake of record keeping and CC you so everyone is on the same page, the last line ALWAYS says “[Name], I’m CCing your parents on this email so we’re all on the same page, but please be aware that this is your responsibility entirely.” Responding telling your kid you’re going to “get through this together” is both insane and counterproductive. YOUR KID DOESN’T NEED YOU TO HELP THEM “GET THROUGH” THIS BECAUSE THERE IS NOTHING TO GET THROUGH. They broke a rule and I called them out - this is called accountability. And so help me if you express it’s not their fault. Yes, it fucking is. You’re making them worse at being a person and therefore you are a shitty fucking parent. Competitions are not family time. You don’t get to come into our team space. This isn’t dance moms. I will have you removed. If your kid comes home and complains that I was “mean” or I “made them do PT” or I “said they didn’t do it right” I need you to really think about that for a fucking second before you hop on your keyboard to type me an 8 paragraph email about how upset your darling is. Your freshman is probably really bad at things. You literally pay money to this program so that they can be better at things. Did you think that would happen through magic? I know they did because they’re fourteen and they have no idea what’s happening until next year but DID YOU GENUINELY THINK your young teenager with no experience was just going to be infallible? Have you ever been outside your home? I’m assuming so, so this shouldn’t be a hard concept for you to understand. If I told your kid to stop being a little bitch, sure thing, send me an email. Report me, whatever the fuck you do in that situation. If I told your kid they need to have a better push up posture and then called them out for not applying the correction GUESS WHAT. THAT’S MY LITERAL JOB. You’re emailing me to tell me that I did my job, and somehow you’re complaining about it. The calendar is accessible to you in six different ways. Jesus fucking christ stop asking me about the calendar. I’m not just going to randomly change it and be like SURPRISE WHOLE NEW CALENDAR TO SHAKE THINGS UP because that’s insane and I am not the insane one in our relationship. Stop teaching your kid to make excuses. When they’re with me their sore toe or whatever the fuck isn’t a huge deal because no one turns it into a deal at all. When they come back and freak out because their “broken toe” is “in so much pain” I know it’s you who did that. If you keep your kid home from practice because they have allergies but they went to school that day you are actually satan. If you bring them to the doctor because they have a bruise or twisted ankle you are lucky to have such nice health insurance. I teach these people classes in understanding and taking care of their bodies with a focus on care for injuries and stretching. They’re fucking fine. Let them get a bump without calling the mayor. I don’t work for you, nor do I work for your kid. Who the fuck put that idea in your head? I will remove you immediately from any event if I hear you spout bigotry, and I will ask you to not return until you can control your mouth. God help you if that bigotry is directed towards one of my students. Idk who you’re regularly communicating with that you think you can send me the same copy/pasted email asking me a question every hour on the hour until I answer you, but that’s not the way things work outside of your head. I don’t sit at my computer waiting for you to ask me the location of the next show (which is on your calendar you never look at because you’re a dirty microwave of a human being). If you describe coaching on this level as a “fun light hobby” I immediately hate you more than anything in the entire world. While you’re sitting on your fucking ass at home watching the Bachelor and old Tiger Woods interviews (oh yeah I know about that, your kid talks about you) I’m training teenagers to be mentally and physically prepared to compete and win. I’m out of the house doing 14 hour workdays so your kid can have enough evening rehearsal time during the week, I give up my Saturdays, and I spend my “free time” planning. I have to answer your goddamn emails. The health, safety, success, and a significant portion of the growth of these teenagers comes from my influence and the program I run. It’s not some casual picnic I’m showing up to that we can laugh about together. If I have a stellar relationship with your offspring, BE HAPPY THERE’S AN ADULT IN THEIR LIFE THEY CAN TRUST. I cannot count the number of times I’ve had a kid crying in my office because they couldn’t handle a situation on their own but didn’t want to talk to their parent about it for whatever reason. I’m not running some popularity contest here. I want your kid to be their best - even when it has nothing to do with me or my team. Try it sometime. Also, as an addition to this one, STOP BEING SHITTY. Your homosexual child knows you’re avoiding them because you know they’re going to come out soon. Your 18 year old is scared to have safe sex because she thinks you will literally harm her physically if you catch her with condoms. Your stepdaughter got into a fistfight because she’s frustrated that you drug test her every morning despite the fact that she’s never done drugs. Finally, you’re welcome. You’re welcome for the hours upon hours of hard labor that go into making sure your kid has somewhere they feel challenged and successful and comfortable. You’re welcome for talking to your kid like they’re a human being, respecting them, and asking for nothing but their attendance and honest attempts during rehearsal. You’re welcome for giving them their college recommendation letters, making sure they get into national honor society, making sure they have scholarships and accolades to mention on their applications, and for being their reference for their first jobs. You’re welcome for teaching them how to go to an interview, how to handle stress, how to address physical and mental ailments, and how to act professional in public. You’re welcome for fucking loving them, protecting them, teaching them, wiping their tears, and waking up every day trying to do right by them. You’re fucking welcome. Love, Coach