#...I am now out of energy because of how long this thing is | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

the-goo-goo-muck · 2 days

Text

NOW PLAYING

BREAKFAST, LUNCH, & DINNER

Starring: Choso Kamo, Kento Nanami, Kiyotaka Ijichi, Sukuna Ryomen, Toji Fushiguro

The JJK men tend to have a healthy appetite when it comes to you

Warnings! oral (f receiving), overstimulation, praise, face-sitting, fingering, male masturbation, ass-play, degradation

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Choso Kamo: Determined <3

Choso maybe does a little bit too much research. He’s heard that some women don’t necessarily like getting head as much as other things. He can’t fathom this because you sucking his dick is about the most pleasurable thing he can think of besides being stuffed inside your cunt. Regardless, he wants to do his very best to make sure this is as pleasurable for you as it is for him; he’s just so concerned he’ll do a bad job. & it makes no difference how much you assure him that “you don’t have to if you don’t want to, sweetie,” & that even if he does do a bad job, you won’t be upset. No, that only encourages him that he needs to make this as good as possible. So when he finally makes up his mind, he’ll let you know as straightforward as usual, probably a text that has you choking on your coffee at 10:00am: “I want to eat you out tonight Y/N.” Straight to the point, as usual. & of course you’re excited, but a swirl of nervousness begins coiling in your stomach. Last time he had his head between your thighs, he was there for hours.

He doesn’t like it when you talk, especially coherently, that means he’s not doing his job. “Faster? But when I go faster with my cock you cry. . .” “It feels good right, baby? Am I doing good?” “Shhh, s’okay, know you can cum for me again, pretty girl, don’t you wanna cum? I love it when you cum on my tongue, just for me.”

He tries to praise you, mimic the sweet things you say to him when you’re jerking him off or riding his cock, but he’s almost as fucked out as you are, & the praise never seems to sound as good spilling from his lips as it does from yours—at least, that’s what he thinks. But his soft spoken, sweet words cause your cunt to pulse against his tongue, so he tries for you anyways; tries anything, because if it gets you off, makes you feel even a fraction as good as you make him feel, he’s more than willing to do it!

He’s the type to eat you out until he loses track of time, cumming in his own pants once or twice, he doesn’t even need to put his cock in you. & it isn’t until you’re cross-eyed, sweaty, voice hoarse, & crying for him that he even considers stopping. “Did it feel good?” If you had any energy, you’d smack him upside the head.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Kento Nanami: Generous <3

If you were to ask Nanami what his favorite thing to do in bed was, it would be–hands-down, without a doubt, easily—eating you out. Of course, he’s a service top until the day he dies, but it’s more than that; he genuinely derives pleasure from making you feel good. After a long day of work, he comes home exhausted, bags under his eyes, muscles sore, & you’re thinking what you could do to make him feel better: a nice shower, a massage, & maybe—if he’d let you—sucking his dick. You’re pretty pleased with yourself about this little plan until you’ve got him in the bedroom, heading to the bathroom to turn on the shower & he’s tugging on your arm, pulling you down on the bed & wordlessly working off your pants.

“Kento? Don’t you wanna shower first?”

He shakes his head, “need to taste you, sweetheart, need it.”

He hooks his arms under your knees, pulling your legs up & over his broad shoulders, making himself comfortable, in for the long haul.

His favorite is when you’ve sat down on him, hands gripping the headboard, mindlessly grinding against his face, chasing your own pleasure, head empty. You feel bad sometimes, sitting on his face, or grinding your cunt against him, squeezing your thighs around his head, pulling his hair, but if anything, this adds to his enjoyment of it. He could sit with his head between your legs for as long as you’ll let him, & you always let him because he’s just so damn good at it; you don’t have to tell him what you want, what you need, because he already knows.

He sticks his tongue into your tight hole, relishing, moaning at the way it spasms around it, working a finger in alongside it, curling it up to that special spot that has you throwing your head back & whining his name. Sucking on your clit, almost meanly because he knows, he knows, how overstimulated you are, how it hurts so good.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Kiyotaka Ijichi: Desperate <3

“You-you taste so good, pretty girl, s’good, please, n-no, don’t gotta run from it,” he whines as you attempt to rock your hips up off the bed, obviously grinding his hips onto the bed, hoping you won’t notice. He’s just so eager, he needs you to cum against his face just one more time. He’s whining like a poor puppy when you pull on his hair. Pathetic moans fill the air, & you’re losing it because there’s no technique, no method to the madness, just pure, sheer, utter desperation. & he’s apologizing into your soaking cunt as he ruts into the bed through his orgasm, potentially gaining more pleasure from this than you. It was always so easy to make Kiyotaka feel good, just your moans of “more, more, so good, Kiyo” had him whining into your pussy, palming his sore dick through his boxers.

What he lacks in skill, he makes up for in eagerness; eager is the perfect word for the way Kiyotaka eats you, tongue lying flat over & over on your slit, tongue slipping in & out of your puckering hole, thumb circling your clit constantly, overwhelming your poor cunt.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Sukuna Ryomen: Aloof <3

It was rare that Sukuna ate you out, not because he doesn’t like it, don’t get it twisted, but it’s so vulnerable of him, & he can’t fully control himself when he’s between your legs. He’s contrastingly gently, savoring every inch of you, alternating between sucking on your thighs, teasing you to no end, & assaulting your clit with his tongue & his fingers. He loves to have your hips in his hands, manhandling you how he wants, fingertips leaving bruises on your waist, growling when you whine out, “w-wait ‘Kuna, s’too much,” because “Isn’t this what you wanted in the first place?”

Maybe you had wanted this, but you hadn’t expected him to go on for so long. You couldn’t remember a time when you’d seen Sukuna have any form of patience, barely even prepping you before bullying his cocks into you, but here he was, taking his time with you, not even worried about his own pleasure, too enchanted by your honeyed pussy, just begging for him.

He’ll never tell you this, but his favorite time to eat you out is when you’re on your period; he’ll disguise it by saying that it makes your scent stronger, but really he just wants to ease your pain & make you feel better.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Toji Fushiguro: Rug Muncher <3

God, he’s an asshole. Don’t get it wrong, he loves eating that sweet cunt of yours, but he also loves nothing more than teasing you. He’s got you on your knees, upper body resting on the sheets, pressing the chastest of kisses on your thighs, your folds, hands slowly gripping your ass, spreading it open for him, swirling his tongue around your puckered hole just above your pussy, pushing a finger in even though he knows you’re cunt is aching for him. He’ll get there. . .eventually.

“Nghh—n-no, Toji, n-not there,” you whine, trying to pull away from his finger, but he just pushes it in deeper.

“Not there? Where d’ya want in then, princess?” & fuck it, he knows where you want it, but he just can’t get over how perfect you are like this: needy, desperate, unabashed. You’re not afraid to beg for what you want. But he doesn’t give you time to ask. “You sure you aren’t just pretending not to like it? ‘Cause your pussy clenches every time I put my finger in here.” He laughs meanly, but then he’s sticking his tongue in your pussy, licking fat stripes front to back, spitting on it, shaking his head all up in it. Toji likes it when you give him messy head, & so of course he likes to return the favor.

You’re reaching down to rub your clit while he’s taking his sweet time getting you off & then he’s swatting your hand away because you’re gonna take what he gives you or get nothing at all.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

no, your honor, i don't believe in writing ooc headcanons. . .

LOOKING FOR SOME MORE? MASTERLIST <3

LOOKING FOR SOMETHING SPECIFIC? ASK <3

322 notes · View notes

soaps-mohawk · 17 hours

Text

I'm so sorry to everyone that I freaked out with the last post, I was trying so hard not to 😭 I have that like instant fear as soon as I see "we need to talk" or something in the same vein. I always think it's something bad.

This isn't bad, at least depending on how your perspective I guess.

So...I'm having thoughts about CRCB in October. I planned out posting schedules for Kyletober and CRCB and my Patreon stuff and it's going to basically be a post every day, sometimes multiple in multiple places.

That's a lot.

So, I am set on doing Kyletober since all of the fics are already written, but I was planning on continuing CRCB during October as well. But...I think I need a little break from CRCB. It's been about eight months of posting almost every single week and it's been a lot. I'm struggling with chapters right now and with work it's vastly limiting the time I have to write and focus on things and I'm kind of burning out right now.

So, what I wanted to discuss was potentially putting CRCB on hold for October while I focus on Kyletober and everything involved with that. Trying to do both is a lot and I'm not sure I can handle all of it, plus life, plus work.

I was planning on not necessarily putting CRCB on hold, but doing more of a "whenever I can/am inspired" random posting chapters kind of like I did in the beginning when I first started writing the fic, in November/December because those are very busy months and I will be dead tired from work and just general life.

I think I might still do that for November/December and possibly into the new year since there's no way the fic will be finished even if I posted every week until the end of December.

BUT

That's something I'll think about and make a decision on later.

Right now, my thought is...would you hate me if I put CRCB on pause in October? IF I do, I promise I won't end Chapter 39 on a cliffhanger. I wasn't planning on it anyway, but I promise I won't end it on a cliffhanger if I decide not to post any chapters in October.

That way if I do put it on pause, then I can not focus on it for a bit and give my brain a refresh, and I can also focus all my energy on Kyletober.

So yeah, it's going to be a lot doing both at the same time, and honestly I'm ready for a little break from CRCB. It's been going for a long time and it's a lot of words to get out in a week. I've been super stressed lately and I'm just struggling a lot trying to get through chapters.

So yeah. That's basically the dilemma here and the discussion to be had. I know y'all will tell me it's my blog and I can do whatever I want, but I would like opinions on it. Are y'all okay with me putting CRCB on hold to focus on Kyletober? Then pick it back up for probably just whenever I can chapter updates for the rest of the year? In January things will calm down and I'll have more time to relax and write and maybe get close to finishing the story. Plus I know a lot of my readers will be busy the next three months with the holidays and vacations and family and school and all of that, so you won't have to worry about getting behind and having to catch up with a bunch of chapters.

So...let me know...

#I wish I could keep writing it every week #but I need a break #a little refresh one could call it #it might do all of us some good

144 notes · View notes

croissantlover24 · 2 days

Note

Solar angst where he has a panic attack after meeting Nexus again because he reminds him of his Moon?

(Yes yes YESSS)

Solar’s hands shivered. His nonexistent heart began to beat faster and faster, the sound suffocating his audio receptors. The oil within his eyes threatened to spill over. He could hear Nexus saying something in the background, but wasn’t really listening.

This was not how he had wanted things to go.

When Solar confronted his former brother, he thought he’d see some sort of explanation. Some sort of reason.

Not his Moon bubbling back all over again to torture him.

Of course, his Moon was dead. Solar had ensured that himself. However, with how Nexus was acting… it was like his brother was possessed by the ghost of his abuser.

Not a good combination.

“Aww, are you going to cry?” Nexus mocked, flexing his claws and exaggerating his tone.

“Shut up,” Solar hissed, holding back tears.

Nexus came closer.

“I’m not going to change,” he whispered lowly. “I have dark star power. That’s all I need. And soon, I’ll become a god.”

His laughter echoed across the empty halls like a distant wound Solar had long forgotten reopening.

“That may make me the villain of your story,” the lunar animatronic continued, “but I can handle that.”

His voice became colder than ice, frozen over from years of pretending to be someone he was not.

“However… can you?”

“Can’t you do anything right?” Moon had hissed at Solar, slamming his faceplate against the wall repeatedly. “Why are you STILL HERE? Where’s Sun? WHAT’D YOU DO TO MY BROTHER?”

Solar shook his head, pushing the memory back to the deep recesses of his mind. Now was not the time to compare how Nexus had become the person he swore not to be.

“Kneel,” said animatronic commanded, and Solar was suddenly shoved to the ground. He tried to stand, but a force far beyond his own kept him on the ground.

Nexus laughed. “How pathetic.”

“Shut. UP,” Solar hissed, pushing off of the ground and ramming into him. Nexus swiftly dodged, sending Solar barreling into the wall.

“Ugh,” the latter groaned, rubbing his head. Not the smartest decision.

“You’re as foolish as always,” Moon—no, Nexus—teased.

Solar would be lying if he said that he didn’t see the two as one and the same now.

He shook his head. Don’t think about that. DON’T DON’T DON’T—

Solar was slammed to the ground by his former brother yet again, purple magic floating around him.

“Keep your head down,” Nexus growled. “I’m going to make this very clear.”

He grabbed Solar’s faceplate, digging his claws into it and ripping some of the paint off.

“I am not Moon anymore. I am Nexus. Get that straight. Nexus, Nexus, Nexus.” Each time he said his own name, Eclipse—no, Solar (get out of that mindset, Solar)—was punched hard in the face.

Nexus was still going easy on him.

He grinned maniacally, the thing spread far too wide. “I’m glad we’ve come to an understanding.”

He disappeared.

And that’s when the panic attack formed.

Solar’s airways felt tight, as if they had rusted over and filled with dust. Each breath didn’t seem enough, like he needed more more more air and—he wasn’t getting enough of it. He was suffocating, a victim of his own mind. Nervous energy jittered through him, convincing him of hallucinations that weren’t there.

“You’re pathetic.”

“You’re the reason Sun is gone.”

“I’m going to kill you.”

Was it his Moon or Nexus saying those things? Solar suddenly couldn’t remember.

He collapsed against the wall, gripping his head tightly as his heart raced and his mind reeled.

Sleep was… a far away dream for Solar that night.

#pastry writes #pastry answers #sun and moon show #the sun and moon show #sams #tsams

22 notes · View notes

bloopitynoot · 3 days

Text

Reading SVSSS: Chapter 15

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

It's chapter 15! Time to figure out what happened to SQQ in the latest cliff hangar.

Today no tea- but I did have a blackberry cider that was very tasty.

I also did impulse buy a baby's-first-fountain pen to get into my little writing flow and add to the ambiance of my note taking journey. So, pls ignore the worse-than-usual writing; I am learning to write with it.

let's goooooo!

Well, SQQ appears to be in a coffin? p29

fuck, i'm already smudging the ink with my new pen. The lefty curse of it all. IDK how much of this is going to be legible later. RIP

okay... but how long has he been in here? MXTX is describing everything as dusty as hell. p30 (resolved as I read further- not very long LOL)

and he has his original body! That's exciting! Who did it though?? p30

LOL SQQ has 0 chance with this "advanced level plot" p31. He is totally fucked for sure.

These 'blind corpses' sound like a walking horror show. I would be so scared omg. I don't know how far the animated series got- but if this is animated that would look cool as fuck. p32

okay! they're fueled by breath! that's really neat though! pp33-34 Scary, but cool.

I would die immediately in this situation. When the thing (blind corpses) that are already horrible and unbeatable are scared of something else -> absolutely no hope in surviving. p35

ah, it is our little snake-man. I had a suspicion this was related to him and Luo Binghe's dad. He probably took SQQ's corpse too and brought it here. p35

OMG LOL Luo Binghe's dad is awful, but also feels like a troll AND is serving dad jokes. Re: thinking back to when SQQ knocked on the coffin and he answered from inside LOOOL. p36

Listen. Can we just take a moment to appreciate the absolute DILF that is Luo Binghe's father? I am a whole lesbian but that character art cannot objectively argued as anything else. p37

and now SQQ is going on about Tianlang-jun having BDE (not those exact words but I mean when you say he's working that coffin like it's a Paris fashion week runway and Luo binghe - the man you are obsessed with- could NEVER, it says something.). p38

That fucking power move too! SQQ: seems you've waited a while to meet me, why don't you come out of there and do so. Tianlang-jun: *bats eyes* okay but only if you hold my hand and work for it p39

SQQ has this habit of getting kidnapped "for his own good" but no one ever tells him why it's good for him XD this entire situation is so annoying. Tianlang-jun did this all so that he could get him away from the sects he wanted to destroy. p43

OMG scratch that. He also wants to use him as bait to snatch his sons body as his own. p45.

aside: I'm going to have to organize these notes later- I'm not catching the nuance in the hand written notes LOL my brain is processing faster than my hand (you will notice that the last 2 points here do not match my hand written notes because they were a hot mess).

What an entrance Luo Binghe! p47

Yes SQQ! You rescue your man from his dad (RE: holding Zhuzhi lang hostage) p51

holy shit. Zhuzhi lang is WILD - he really was about to just die instead of be a hostage LOL p52 I want to know what his character motivation is. He's giving the same blind trust energy as The Core Melting Hand in MDZS. Both just so loyal to a fault/their own demise. Do we learn more? or is this it? (genuine question- don't tell me WHAT we learn, just yes/no if we learn more).

That was so smart to hit the anti-theft measures in the tomb p53

aaaaaaaand he snatched the wrong person on the escape. well, that's fantastic. p54

I am loving the traps in this mausoleum though! The face with the magma and then the various rooms. I want to know if this exists as a D&D dungeon crawl/anyone has made one, I think it would be so fun. p59

omg. I don't think that Luo Binghe realizes/knows that that was his own father and cousin. that's so terrible. Truly Luo Binghe was treated so fucking badly literally his entire life. His dad does not even give a shit. Honestly probably only had him for this situation - needing a new body. p61

:((((( Our boy, Luo Binghe is in a bad way rn. gah! so many cliff hangers. p63

MXTX Cliffhangar Lord

And now I have to wait until tomorrow to see if baby Luo Binghe makes it. I'm sure SQQ is going to do something about it but dang, he is not well.

#bloopitynoot reads svsss #svsss spoilers #mxtx svsss #svsss #scum villian self saving system #scum villain #we have left the mushroom bod officially #RIP SQQ's mushroom body

28 notes · View notes

dykrophone · 5 months

Text

life went forward and the world moved on but I never got over among us (2018)

#but no one:(( will play it:(( with me:((#i miss amogus with my ex best friend and all her friends #she was just like me fr she loved introducing all her friends to each other its another reason i loved her so much #and why i struggled so much when my high school best friend started making friends outside of me who didnt like me #one of them even gave me this long ass lecture on KAVYA YOU DONT NEED TO BE FRIENDS WITH ALL YOUR FRIENDS' FRIENDS YOU KNOW #oh and you cAnt jUst Ask pEoPle tO bE yOuR fRiEnd (jokes on her we're friends now. kind of ive been ghosting her for a while but not the po #Int 💀)#and look i learned that. sort of. but i still struggle with it sometimes #like at least with my best friends i always wanted to know about and be involved with everyone in their lives you know #which ive realized now is not practical #but im still this hopeless romantic who wants to be friends with all my friends friends and all my friends to be friends #even if i barely have the energy for it anymore. i guess losing her drilled that in #also another thing i realized is. its good to keep your friends separate sometimes because if the chain breaks you dont lose a whole system #which wasnt even a point of consideration for me back then because like i said. hopeless romantic. why would we ever fall out #but yeah it was hard having to accept that sometimes the whole world doesnt want to be friends. and people are allowed to dislike each othe #shocking i know #anyway what am i even talking about how did i get here #liveblogging.pdf

21 notes · View notes

cuteniaarts · 6 months

Text

Behold, my latest and most enamouring new obsession:

Malina, Lady of the Chief of the Northern Water Tribe. As if Red Lotus child OCs weren’t niche enough

#my art #artists on tumblr #the legend of korra #lok malina #still feel like that’s too vague of a tag but I can’t come up with anything better for now #and yeah. she has completely stolen by heart and I don’t know how to feel about that #don’t think I ever was this attracted to my own art before #to be fair the design isn’t mine. it’s very heavily based on something nina drew back in 2021 #because I did not have the energy or creativity to come up with my own thing #but the art is all mine and I genuinely adore it. super proud of myself which is a rare occurrence #anyways. kat and I spent three days digging this niche lower and lower and now have a he #*hell of a lot of lore about this basically nonexistent character #for lore about a lady from the North Pole a lot of it is rather hot… to the point my cheeks are burning non stop #I would say I’d let her do anything she wants to me but in my very specific aroace-adjacent case it’s more like #I’d let her tell me to do anything she wants to her #if that makes any sense and I have not completely lost my goddamn mind yet #okay. enough yapping. back to the art itself #lazy background because I suck at those and am not currently attempting to learn them. I’ll probably do that over the summer #about time anyway. my characters have been placed against an off-white background for far. far too long #this is the first piece in just over a year that isn’t tagged with sotrl. which is kinda weird tbh #I’ve been drawing my OCs almost exclusively for nearly 5 years so it is genuinely surprise I’m branching out #*surprising #less branching out and more diving from one hole into another but y’know #anyway. in my personal and very correct opinion she turned out absolutely gorgeous #her servants are way too lucky and unalaq is way too much of an idiot. no offence to vaatu but he could never beat out this #and I also have Kat’s personal and very correct opinion to back up my own. two against the void. once again we’re winning #I wanna draw her a lot more bc she has completely possessed my brain. I just wish character interactions were easier to draw 😭#I’ll figure it out. just need to fight my visualisation issues for a proper idea. brb #okay I’m almost at the tag limit so. in summary:#she 🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵

8 notes · View notes

wowbright · 1 year

Text

Ugh why lately do I keep remembering traumatic events from my childhood that explain so much?

#gpoy #actually cptsd #I'm not talking about recovered memories #just things I haven't thought about in ages #and am for the first time (after a few decades) fully realizing they are fucked up #what say you not everyone's childhood was like that? whoa #also hilarious because I have known for a long time that I had a difficult childhood #how am I still discovering new layers to it #or rather new layers and how it has affected the way I relate to the world #so I mean in some ways it's good #I have had therapists who tell me it's not necessarily productive to what's the reasons why I do things #and I think that's true to some extent #because searching for them doesn't mean you'll find them & you can spend expend lots of energy searching that you could spend doing sth else #but when they just kind of appear out of nowhere and slap you in the face #it's a great opportunity to examine them and their relationship to today and go #oh fuck you mean I don't do this maladaptive thing for no reason!#I do it for a very good reason #and now I understand how it was once adaptive and helpful #and understanding that puts me in a better position to let go of it and figure out better ways to adapt to current challenges

17 notes · View notes

kxllerblond · 1 year

Text

Happy Tuesday everyone, I will now be unloading unsolicited opinions about the RPC.

People take 'This is a hobby!!' way too far to the point you are not taking into account other real people also exist and are only thinking about yourself and it can come across as scummy and self-absorbed and a lot of people use the 'just a hobby!' to excuse this shitty behavior and an inability to communicate with other hobby enjoyers like adults.

No one should get mad at people for dropping threads or not being active, but it's also super shitty to just ghost people and go 'teehee just a hobby so you aren't allowed to be upset!'. Like, yeah, you have limited time and a real life but so does?? everyone else on here?? It's super not cool to just invalidate people who are upset their limited time is, in their view, being wasted.

Obviously, I'm not defending people that don't just unfollow or block and move on and who get passive aggro about it all. And I'm also not calling out the people that don't do much but are like PRESENT to some degree even if it's just ooc shitposting.

I mainly mean the people I see who refuse to do threads, to answer asks, to communicate when stuff is being dropped to some degree, to participate and be social in any capacity and then get kinda pissy when no one wants to send them shit anymore. Like you are entitled to exist and participate in this hobby as you see fit....but it is a social hobby. You HAVE to give to get and if people pin you as someone who only takes, they're going to stop giving. None of us have little meow meows that are so interesting that we can just expect people to frolic to them and gush about them and shower them with interaction without some sort of reciprocation.

And, frankly, I don't think there's room to complain when that happens. You can't have your cake and eat it too in this scenario. You can 'this is just a hobby!' your way through things how you like, but you also have to realize the consequences of that and you can't be upset when they come down on you and your blog.

#like I KNOW there are ppl here i am chill with who do not interact with me as often as before because i am a notorious thread dropper #and not everyone can do that short thread. drop. new thread. drop. manner of rapid rping #and thats FINE. i accept that consequence.#and there are ppl im chill with who i dont send memes to much anymore because they never answer them or never return the favor #doesnt mean im mad about it doesnt mean i fault them for it. ppl have lives. but that the consequence and it involves me redirecting my tim #and energy to send memes to ppl who DO engage in return etc #there's just been this sudden surge in like....entitlement ive noticed. and it's just sort of co-opd what used to be a message #directed at ppl that were being demanded to reply to things the same day etc like it was a legit /good/ message #now you cant even like unfollow someone without them being like ITS JUST A HOBBY HOW DARE YOU UNFOLLOW hostility because someone is choosin #to take their business elsewhere so to speak so they can have fun with this hOBBY. its so...weird ykno #we dont owe anyone anything but a lot of ppl forget the second half of that which is #yeah but other people dont owe us anything in turn either #cw long post #cw negativity #well i mean only if you see urself in this post i guess OOP. otherwise man idk #dont get pissed at ppl for not hobbying to ur speed or standards #but also dont be surprised to learn ppl are different and have different paces and shit and WILL move on #if theyre not getting enjoyment out of the pace you're hobbying at #ur not entitled to their attention just like they're not entitled to urs ykno

15 notes · View notes

orcelito · 2 months

Text

ok i am actually so very angry and there's literally nothing i can do to fix it. life keeps going on. she might even be happy. and fuck dude, i'll make sure im happy too, i was a fully developed person before she was in my life and i'll continue to be one without her. but God Damn, the fact that she can just do something so blatantly awful and unfair to me and then run off without any actual repercussions is just so fucking rankling to me.

like perhaps she feels guilty. she said she did when it was all going down. but it was just something she "needed to do". so obviously she didn't feel guilty enough or she wouldnt have done it like that lmaoooo

i really did deserve to have a good solid yell at her. but unfortunately, by the time i did see her in person i just wanted her out of my fucking life. so. no yelling was done, unfortunately.

#speculation nation #the duality of being a deeply resentful and angry person. and being a person that Tries to be mature and peaceful.#like im not gonna actually Do shit even tho i keep wanting to message her just to yell at her some more again #it's like there's a beast in me that keeps yelling for retribution. she wronged me in such a disrespectful and humiliating way #and yet she just gets to walk away like it was nothing? live her life like it was nothing?#be in 'love' with her new 'soulmate' after cutting me off like a rotten limb?#i feel so DEEPLY angry. i want to spit vitriol and fire. i want to dig my claws into her bones. make her really FEEL how i feel.#i want to wander into her dreams and make her experience what i felt. every miserable second of silence.#the humiliation of admitting you might be falling in love only to be told you were never loved at all.#and i want to knee her in the gut and spit in her face and really make her regret ever fucking wronging me #but unfortunately im a stupid fucking pacifist so all the aggression and anger and violence has no FUCKING outlet #ive been. trying to not think about it too much. ive been trying to just live my life. because i dont want her to run my life.#but the anger keeps catching up to me. filtering in when i dont expect it. endless constant fucking thoughts coming back to me #on and on and on and on i live and i eat and i read and i game and i hate and i hate and i hate and i hate and i hate and i HATE AND I HATE #the greatest injustice is that i cannot make her truly feel every single ounce of my resentment and anger #it's so overwhelming i think i could choke on it. and she gets to live her FUCKING happy little life with her stupid fucking 'soulmate'#i hope it collapses around her and she loses her too so she's single and alone and miserable and regretting all of her fucking impulsivenes #she deserves to have it fail after what she did to me. and all i can really do is hope that karma has its fucking kiss for her.#if only curses were real. what i wouldnt give to put some energy into that karmic payback lmfao.#ok . ok ok ok ok love and peace on planet earth. i am shifting out of vitriolic little shit mode.#just had to let some of the steam out. im still angry but i am going to go back to not thinking about it.#i think i should go on a nice long bike ride tomorrow. to decompress and work some of the steam out.#it's something that she can never take from me. something that is so wholly mine. fuck that stupid bitch and fuck her new girlfriend too #...............................ok NOW im shifting out of vitriolic mode. lol #negative/#WAHOOOOOO i am certainly not taking this breakup well. but i dont think anyone would be lmfao.#all things considered i think im doing a pretty great job at handling this breakup.#bc at least im only recounting unrealistic threats and fantasies on my tumblr dot com instead of messaging Any of this to her.#i may kinda want her to read it so that she knows anyways. but i wont message her directly. bc i am Trying to be at least a little mature.#complaining on my tumblr dot com so i dont message my ex with more vitriol. gotta cope Somehow.

4 notes · View notes

iguessitsjustme · 7 months

Text

I have regrets

#do not go into the mdl comment section #i should know better and yet #i have seen some truly horrifying things this night #and i know it's for a show that i am not a fan of #but my concerns are about how casually racist and lowkey homophobic some of the comments are #without any self awareness about it at all #saw someone say that the writing sucks but that's fine because you can't expect good writing out of thailand because it's a small market #and i'm just like pARDON me??? there is AMAZING writing coming out of thailand #just because you watch shit shows doesn't mean they're all shit what in the absolute shit is that?#if i was feeling feistier i would call them out on it #but i used up all of my fight earlier at work because [redacted] department sucks and i hope they get told off #for screwing over me and my coworker who doesn't seem as annoyed as i am but now i have no energy #but that's some shit to just casually say you won't ever expect good writing out of thailand #when uwma and bed friend and triage and 1000 stars and so many more exist #and that's just bl so what the fuck are you going to write off an ENTIRE country saying they can't write? absolutely the fuck not #i hope that person stubs their toe and then right when it starts to feel a bit better they stub it again #i hope their pens always have barely any ink so they have to struggle to write anything #i hope they never get to have wonderfully delicious thai food ever again #and they can only ever eat midwestern casseroles that are more jello than anything else #oh these tags are long oops i guess i'll end my rant here

5 notes · View notes

seilon · 9 months

Text

you know im realizing now. with the exception of a few resident psychiatrists, ive had like. no good experiences with mental health professionals

#most recent occurance is eating my brain alive right now because I feel just so. degraded and offended by how she chose to evaluate me #I won’t get into it because it will make me spiral even more and get angrier and more overwhelmed but tldr she didn’t acknowledge #anything I said about my symptoms both out loud and via written test. chose to ignore or dismiss anything that came from me #as if I couldn’t be trusted to recount my own experiences and feelings. also did not take into account that I am an adult and thus have Had #to learn to mask and shit so while she brushed off So Much Shit because i seemed (in the three hours she met/saw me)#functional Enough. that’s only becuaee I put in a Lot of effort every day to do so. and that effort does not last forever #and of course because. like I said I’m an adult. I’ve been yelled at I’ve been punished I’ve been put through courses and #through the ringer of Society in general to the point where I mimic Normal Person Behavior at least somewhat decently when im prepared to do #so. she treated me like a child and didn’t acknowledge most of my major issues. ignored me when I said I don’t avoid social situations out #of fear/anxiety I avoid them because it takes a lot of energy for me to mask and try and read people and act accordingly #and in her report suggested generalized anxiety. part of the reason I was there is because anxiety HASNT ever properly described my #avoidant behavior.#and just. yeah I said I wouldn’t get into it but here we are. this always happens #it’s just eating at me because I keep realizing more and more things she just fucking disregarded. literally wrote that I ‘listed many #relevant symptoms’ and kept it at that. did not actually give those symptoms any validity. basically just implied I was listing things #just. becuase?#some shit was just blatantly wrong like claiming that I have a variety of interests when I told her outright that I can only be interested #in one specific interest at a time- example being the entirety of last year being only interested in One (1) video game. and this is to such #an extent that it’s difficult to make and maintain friendships because I have no interest in anything else but that One Thing for however #long and won’t care about other things people try to get me into in order to have something in common with me or whatever or just. yeah.#issues.#she didn’t acknowledge the issues I have with low empathy or overstimulation. didn’t acknowledge my history of taking things literally to #such an extent that it has caused problems with people. didn’t acknowledge anything that was self-reported and not being displayed in that #moment right in front of her eyes. it’s just. really really disappointing and. yeah degrading honestly #especially because it took months upon MONTHS to get this fucking appointment #and to just be not listened to and dismissed.#anyway. yeah I’ve also just only ever had really shallow relationships with therapists (at best)#and have never felt helped by them or like they ever put in much effort to try to Get to me so to speak. only my psychiatrists have #been open minded and Listened to me. but they were always residents so they’d leave in a year or so. I don’t have one at this point.#kibumblabs

5 notes · View notes

hxlcyon · 1 year

Text

hi guys i am so stressed watch me dive into honkai

#haha what IF #when im extremely stressed i consume media mindlessly #when i am not and i cognizantly eat media is when im alive and i love u #aka if i have energy i give things the proper attention i think they deserve #if not? then i just eat it and im done with it forever.#insight into the ammy world i suppose #anyway i have three finals due today and i just finished one but i have three left HAHAHAHA #86 helped me in the studying part #and that's a series i WANT to stay in #but i finished the anime caught up to the hiatus/cancelled manga #so now i am left to buy the light novels which. ill... do over the summer when i have money #so for now? since this is on the rise? honkai time i guess #though i should finish and catch up to path to nowhere #because i dont know what the FUCK is happening in star rail #i like a lot of the motifs though so i would like to know #uhm. you think id get back into twst soon uhm. im sorry #i WILL its just. eueueueu... let me finish my school year off so i cand rown in twst #anyway. time to figure out how it starts??? its long damn

9 notes · View notes

momochiiee-reblogs · 10 months

Text

Being screamed at for things that aren't my fault seems to be a norm in this house

There's cookware scattered an dirty? Guess who gets blamed for it? The exact one that almost never has spoons for cooking in the first place

I live cleaning the trail after me so they won't have any reason to scream at me, but my brother leaves absolute messes behind him and the screams are for me

Fuck off