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Sleepy Guy
Summary: Lando Norris cannot be left alone for longer than thirty seconds before he is fast asleep.
Requested / No

Instagram /
liked by: lando, maxfewtrell, carlossainz55, mclaren and 992,901 others
yn.ln: he's just a sleepy guy
username: hes so cute i love him
lando: oi you muppet who said you could post that
| yn.ln: ignore him guys hes just grumpy because he needs another nap
| lando: it was one time, i dont even nap that much
| maxfewtrell: mate you were in my house for less than five minutes last week before you fell asleep on my couch
| yn.ln: @/maxfewtrell please start sending pictures to me, thank you
| lando: dont you dare max
username: i love these two together
username: creep
Instagram /
liked by: lando, maxfewtrell, mclaren, charles_leclerc and 822,901 others
yn.ln: "it was one time" he said, "i dont even nap that much" he said. anyway heres lando napping at 1pm
username: this is the content we want
lando: stop posting pictures of me sleeping!!!
| yn.ln: no
username: dont let him stop you queen
username: iconic
Twitter /

Replies:
username: she is so funny😭
username: not her getting the grid involved
username: bestie why do you want pictures of him sleeping😭
| yn.ln: me and @/maxfewtrell are testing a theory
carlossainz55: texting you rn
| lando: you're dead to me
| carlossainz55: you are my best friend but she said i am legally obligated
lando: do NOT send my absolute numpty of a girlfriend pictures of me asleep
YN's Instagram Story /
Story replies:
maxfewtrell: where's the option of he was asleep before you hit post?
maxfewtrell: i give him less than 30 seconds
yn.ln: he was gone in 23
Story replies:
lando: i hate you
username: im in love with both of you
username: my parents omg
Instagram /
liked by: lando, carlossainz55, mclaren and 982,901 others
yn.ln: look who stayed awake long enough to take me out
lando: i love you 🧡
| lando: wait i take that back i just read the caption
| yn.ln: no take backs🥰
maxfewtrell: proud of you lando 💪🏻
username: lando is never living down the sleepy boy allegations
username: idk who im more jealous of
username: mom and dad are so hot
Instagram /
liked by: lando, maxfewtrell, mclaren and 992,901 others
yn.ln: this is @/lando. his hobbies include racing and being unconscious
maxfewtrell: perfectly summed him up
| yn.ln: right like there's literally nothing else to know about him
| lando: nothing except for the fact that im in love with the biggest idiot in the world
| lando: introducing you two was the worst mistake of my life
username: hes so dramatic
mclaren: as long as he stays awake to race he can nap away
username: i would LOVE to see her camera roll
Instagram:
liked by: lando, mclaren, maxfewtrell, oscarpiastri and 1,092,901 others
yn.ln: caught in the act 📸
lando: hiding your phone from you
| yn.ln: im just giving the people what they want
username: no but look how he looks at her
username: hes in love
username: i love how annoyed he acts in her comments but you cant deny that smile
YN's Instagram Story /
Story replies:
lando: he is dead to me
charles_leclerc: wow I thought I was your favourite
| yn.ln: send me pictures of the cute boy asleep and you will be
mclaren: WE WANT TO BE YOUR FAVOURITE
| yn.ln: admin, you know what to do
maxfewtrell: how are you actually getting them involved
| yn.ln: hey ive been around as long as lando, im a grid favourite!!
Instagram /
liked by: yn.ln, carlossainz55, maxfewtrell, mclaren and 2,792,901 others
lando: rip to carlando 💔
username: wait what happened?!?
username: they fell out?? omg
| username: no no they didnt carlos just sent a pic of lando sleeping to landos gf
| username: wait what??
| username: fr im so confused
| username: omg no you have to go to @/yn.ln's page rn its sooo good
| username: its basically a page dedicated to lando sleeping and a few pics of her when she remembers
carlossainz55: I love you lando please forgive me
| lando: you picked your side, suffer
Instagram /
liked by: mclaren, maxfewtrell, yn.ln, oscarpiastri and 2,792,901 others
lando: since my gf never posts nice pictures of me anymore, here's some from this month 🙄
username: LMAO HE HATES THIS
mclaren: our favourite couple
username: he rlly said i love her but shes annoying
yn.ln: god we're so hot, i love us
yn.ln: i love you
| lando: i love you too, even if you are annoying
Instagram /
liked by: mclaren, lando, maxfewtrell, oscarpiastri and 1,792,901 others
yn.ln: why yes this is a man sleeping on the floor of the paddock.
lando: you're not even here ?????
lando: tell me which one of them sent it
| oscarpiastri: 🤐🤐
| lando: YOU!?!? MY OWN TEAM MATE 😭
| lando: first carlando dies and now landoscar
| lando: the betrayals just keep coming
| yn.ln: it was a pleasure working with you, @/oscarpiastri
username: damn yn is just making friendships with everyone on the grid
| username: shes been around these guys ever since lando joined f1 they love her
Instagram /
liked by: lando, oscarpiastri, mclaren, maxfewtrell and 1,792,901 others
yn.ln: i mean...at least take the uniform off
username: hes so sleepy
lando: WHO WAS IN MY DRIVERS ROOM
| yn.ln: your mum sent me that one
| lando: YOU TURNED MY MUM AGAINST ME!??
| yn.ln: please we both know im her favourite
username: I feel like im reading their private texts
Instagram /
liked by: lando, mclaren, maxfewtrell, and 1,792,901 others
yn.ln: we have a date in thirty minutes, @/lando
username: ooo someones in trouble
username: did he wake up tho
username: the others have all been good fun but this one feels like a fight if he doesnt wake up
username: obsessed with the fact she looks that good and yet the first two slides are him asleep
| username: on brand really
maxfewtrell: I'll pick you up in half an hour, no need to waste the night
| lando: stay away
Story replies:
yn.ln: love you🧡
maxfewtrell: lucky mate you'd have been on the couch
| lando: tell me about it
Instagram /
liked by: lando, maxfewtrell, carlossainz55 and 1,792,901 others
yn.ln: i mean, it's a step up from sleeping in fireproofs but come on
username: bro was too tired
username: idk he looks comfy
username: still not the worst place hes slept
| yn.ln: fr sleeping with the luggage?? nothing to lando
lando: this is bullying
Instagram /
liked by: lando, mclaren, maxfewtrell, oscarpiastri, skysportsf1 and 2,792,901 others
yn.ln: how?? just?? how??
lando: who sent this one
| yn.ln this one was live on @/skysportsf1 baby
| skysportsf1: anything for you yn 🫡
| username: she even has sky sports on it omg
username: i fear for his safety in this one
lando: I wasn't even asleep here, I was just resting my eyes
| yn.ln: of course you were baby, that's why you stayed like that for twenty minutes until will woke you up
| blondie_wdj: shes right mate, you were snoring
Instagram /
liked by: lando, mclaren, maxfewtrell and 1,792,901 others
yn.ln: imagine looking this good after waking up from a nap 🥵 like what do you mean hes mine???
username: girlie is down bad today
username: she remembered he was hot
lando: still not great but ill take it because at least im awake
| yn.ln: still not great he says like he doesn't look like a fucking god
| username: oh we're being unhinged today i love it
lando: what do you mean "hes mine" like im not the lucky one but ok
Instagram /
liked by: lando, maxfewtrell, mclaren, maxverstappen1 and 2,392,901 others
yn.ln: why yes this is a man sleeping on the floor of the paddock. (part two)
lando: alright. who sent it?
maxverstappen1: sorry mate
lando: I expected better from you
username: i cant defend him anymore
username: i mean...he looks comfy but ??
yn.ln: i love this one
| lando: creep
Instagram /

liked by: lando, maxfewtrell, mclaren and 2,992,901 others
yn.ln: I swear I left for less than thirty seconds
username: hes so cute
username: lando come on man
username: my favourite thing about these are that the posts arent even spread that far apart
| username: real like shes not having to wait days or weeks, its just a daily occurrence
lando: ok in my defence im jet lagged
| yn.ln: and all the other times?
| lando: i....have nothing
Instagram /
liked by: mclaren, maxfewtell, lando, and 1,92,901 others
yn.ln: lando has never met a flat surface he can't sleep on
lando: im not even asking who sent them. the whole grid is dead to me
| yn.ln: he doesn't mean it guys, he just needs a nap 🧡
username: lmaooooo lando beefing with everyone
username: hes just sleepy
username: hes just jealous yn is everyones favourite
Instagram /
liked by: lando, maxfewtrell, mclaren, oscarpiastri, carlossainz55 and 3,982,901 others
yn.ln: my sleepy boy 🧡 happy birthday, my love. I was there when the first picture was taken years ago and I’m still here to take new pictures today, to create new memories with you, to experience life with you 🥰 I am so so in love with you and so proud of everything you have done since you were that little boy I met and knew I had to be friends with because he was going to be incredible! Even if you are the sleepiest person I know, I could think of nobody better to come home to every night, to laugh with as we scroll through my photo gallery, to argue with, to love more than I have ever loved. I cannot wait to keep growing with you, to watch as you succeed, to watch you thrive. I love you baby 🥰
lando: baby!!! I love you so much, more than words could ever say! I am so grateful that you want to be mine everyday, even if I fall asleep when you're mid rant. I love you baby, can't wait to celebrate with you for the rest of our lives
username: im far too single for this
username: the birthday post had to be of him asleep
username: they're so in love omg
Instagram /
liked by: mclaren, maxfewtell, yn.ln, and 4,92,901 others
lando: got you, you muppet
yn.ln: this is....honestly fair
username: a long time coming
username: theyre so cute omg
mclaren: our favourite sleepy couple
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reasons to (hate) love you || lhs
Saw this come up in my feed and I just knew I had to read it. I love that the genre is academic rivals to loves with class dynamics in the mix; which fits the entire theme of them being law students as that is often present in that environment as well! Anyways unto my thoughts :)
What I immediately love about the beginning is the way Hee talks about the system and the fact that is flawed and then pivots to the hypocrisy of it all and just tying it to the mc’s behaviour—it just shows how much he actually thinks about her because despite him not really caring about her presence, hes very attentive of her and plays it off with just her drawing attention.
I think too because the class dynamic is obvious its easier for Hee to lean in a bit more to thinking she is hypocritic because not only is it easy considering shes from an upper middle class but also because of the way she seems to carry about her self (i assume with confidence and a “i dont care” kind of attitude) would in fact make sense to irritate Hee and make him dislike her to the extent that he does.
He couldn't put it into words, but you triggered specific emotions in his brain — and the main one was agitation.
I love that he’s just agitated at her existence honestly. Also love that immediately from MC’s perspective, you can tell what her family dynamic is like just from her college options alone. Not only does it highlight an issue in a lot of cultures where this kind of behaviour is present (even if the family isnt necessarily well off) but given her family history it also shows the root of why some parents give their children limited choices in their career paths; their own battles with poverty and its their way of protecting their child from going through the same hardships even if it involves dismissing your clear talents or interests.
The way your hand handed your phone while you looked away irritated Heeseung deeply “Do you always have to be this petty?”
“What?” You asked confused as he finished putting his number into your phone “Can’t you interact for 5 minutes without being petty? Is it that hard?”
Im laughing it this because im just as confused like, where is she petty? She’s disinterested sure, but if she was truly petty i think she wouldnt have even talked to him in the first place.
“And isn’t your topic simple?” he approached you and looked into your eyes “You just want to do what’s convenient for you, as always.”
Honestly, I’d love to know whats exactly so convenient about this for her, i genuinely do not see it. Maybe its because I agree with her sentiments in just doing a more complicated/non-basic topic for the sake of it, so perhaps I am a bit biased but I dont get Hee’s point of view pertaining to it (love him still tho).
Loving the way Jay and Jake tease Hee about his interactions with MC from the way he seems more worried about her during exam season to the fact that she’s attractive and he admits it before brushing it off with ease that shes annoying is king of cute. I love that its just her social status is what irritates him the most which makes sense why all the arguments he starts with her feel baseless (at least imo)
I think its cute that mc is super accommodating to Hee seeing his clear exhaustion but hes so snappy about it.
“I’m sorry.” Heeseung opened his eyes slightly and looked at you in a way that you swore you almost saw some kind of affection “Don’t go, please.”
I just think from here and their conversation after is so cute because despite the clear animosity between them mc still cares for him and his wellbeing and gets him orange juice and everything :((( and the way he genuinely smiles at her?? Im so fucking soft man
I love mc making Hee’s nickname Lee Heestupid thats oddly cute. But whats even cuter is the way he messaged her to say thanks again and she asks if hes better :(
“We can talk about criminal accountability and the evolution of post-war human rights within international law.”
This is such a cool topic i cant lie. As a resident law hater, (for no other reason than it has too many words and uses the most complicated words in the english lexicon—native language btw) I am actually so intrigued by the entire law aspect of this fic because its so in depth and I appreciate that despite my distaste for it.
But he never really stopped to look at you. Heeseung’s judgment was always clouded by his anger at what you represented.
Love this because despite seeing her (and admitting to her beauty) this emphasizes that he hasnt looked at her beyond the privileged girl he sees and ugh, something about this line just gets to me.
I love that he notices her clear discomfort in the guy approaching and goes as far as to get him to back off, which is not only respectful but super sweet because despite not liking her, he respects and understands shes a woman and idk, its just a cute scene to me. Super glad for their little bonding moment after, theyre actually so cute when they arent biting each other’s head off.
Girl friendships in fics will always make me happy so Im always appreciative to see Gaeul and the moments she has with the mc, shes such a sweet and darling side character honestly.
You were smiling as you watched something interesting a boy was showing you on his phone. He recognized the boy as Jungwon, the president of one of the clubs you were a part of.
The way my brain immediately went Aww. Jungwon has the ability to raise the motherly instincts in me and just ahh, this little interaction makes me happy. Also Hee being jealous is so hilarious to me even if he doesnt openly say it; hehe Jay picking up on it makes me giggle
I love that as certain things happen between them we see how their thoughts on each other transform—Hee becoming jealous and mc realizing how attractive his voice sounds. I love this.
“I guess I just wanted to talk to you directly about the subject.”
A line like this would drive me crazy honestly.
“Because I’m already in bed and I’m shirtless.” You froze, feeling your cheeks heat up at what he said and blamed yourself for imagining him shirtless calling you in the middle of the night.
AHHH?? That feels so flirtatious to me, screaming
At this point they feel more like friends because Hee coming to help her finish her Civil Law presentation is cute honestly, what the fuck
In any case, you had already come to the conclusion that despite your differences, you had finally managed to understand each other — to the point where you began to feel an undeniable and overwhelming attraction to him.
This had me so excited, more changes are about to begin
“Damn, what’s so important that made you distracted like that?” He teased you and you gave him an awkward smile.
'Your lips'
Oh my god, what if I scream??
Im so glad she delves more into her family dynamic, very subtly and I also enjoy Hee’s ability to pivot the topic a bit since he realized the sensitivity of the topic. Aksi Hee becoming more filtarious will be the death of me like
“Are you calling me cute?” Heeseung smirked, bringing his face closer to yours. “I’m talking about the room.” You replied, swallowing hard, opening your laptop.
“Well, that's a pity then.” You felt your cheeks burn and your body fizz at the suggestive tone of his comment.
What if I just combusted
He wanted something to happen and this wasn’t good.
I will pass out i swear (freaking out so bad)
Heeseung kissed you, gently pressing his lips against yours, sending a dose of pleasure through your body. He gave you a long peck and quickly pulled away to make sure that this was really happening.
Giggling because oh my god, its finally happening and its so sweet too jesus, Ill throw up
Not even his deepest thoughts could recreate the exultant feeling he felt when he finally kissed you.
I will pass out for real
BIT JAKE DISTURBING NOOOO😭😭😭😭
“You look beautiful.” He took your hand and gave it a soft kiss on your knuckles while piercing through you with his intense eyes.
Girl istg I cant take this what the ?!?!
He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. “What I mean is that I’m here admitting that I want you.” he spoke directly making your legs weak.
You are single-handedly writing lines to make me crazy
“You should see me when I'm not wearing it, then.” you whispered sensually before biting Heeseung's ear making his breath shaky as he squeezed your thighs tightly “Fuck — stop teasing me, baby.”
Dont know if I wanna be Hee or her in this moment christ.
Man, first jake now her dad; the universe is really going out of its way to stop them. To make it worse, her dad is there?? I feel sick.
And just like lightning strikes a tree and burns it, you realized the obvious truth: you were in love with Lee Heeseung and would accept the consequences that would come with that reality.
Oh my god, this is so fucking sweet what
I lovelovelove that the entire interaction has made him realize fully what she had to deal with and the fact that he apologies?? On my knees oh my god
If someone had told you at the beginning of the semester that you would now be dating Lee Heeseung and walking hand in hand around campus, you would have thought they were crazy and needed to be hospitalized. But here you were, walking with a wide smile and bright eyes, your hand intertwined with Heeseung's soft fingers.
Oh my god I giggled again, im so happy hehe
I love that despite the relationship with her dad still being kind of unclear, you can tell theres improvement with the way hes so neutral with her going to other offices, its progress and Im happy with it. At least she should be able to find herself in the world of law better I think :)
We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected for an internship position at our law firm. We look forward to receiving your answer as soon as possible. — Jung & Taylor Legal Advisors
Perhaps your and Heeseung's journey into the legal world was just in the beginning.
Oh my god the end. Im so glad I read this, genuinely soso glad, I loved ever moment of it from the play in the class dynamics, the complexity behind it (i truly appreciate the way mc’s dad got out of poverty making it much more complex), the way the relationship between hee and mc began with hee’s distaste being him viewing her so one note and just like “any other rich girl” and mc irritated with just the attitude she got from him. And just the way their relationship blossomed so sweetly. Ugh, again Im so glad I read this.
Ruby, you have truly enraptured me with your writing and you will definitely hear from me again hehe
Lee Heeseung — REASONS TO (HATE) LOVE YOU
Your makeup is always intact, your hair is perfectly brushed, your clothes are always well-ironed and tidy, and your admirable grades are always on top. Many in the law course envy how you seem so perfect, unlike Lee Heeseung, who thinks everything about you is completely irritating. On the other hand, you can't stand Heeseung's arrogance. The way he always acts so pretentiously gets on your nerves, however, when you are forced to do a project together, you'll discover that this tension between you is much more than just hatred.
PAIRING: — Law Students - Heeseung x Reader (f)
GENRE: Academic rivals to lovers - (lower middle class) heeseung x (upper middle class) reader, fluffy, smut (mdni), a bit of angst - if you squint, super suggestive, slowburn.
WARNINGS: - lots of heavy making out (two in a bedroom and one in a storage room), lots of skinship, dirty talking, mutual pining, heavy sexual tension, yearning Heeseung, foreplay, soft dom Heeseung, teasing, petnames (baby, princess, pretty), skin marking (f receiving), unprotected sex, cursing, a few mentions of difficult family dynamics, miscommunication at the beginning, bickering, jealousy, Heeseung is kinda mean in the beginning but he becomes a loser and a simp (sorry not sorry), mentions of alcohol, cursing, a very brief mention of a man touching reader's shoulder in a non consensual way. + IVE's gaeul is reader's best friend. [reblogs and comments are always welcome]
WC: 28k — masterlist - perm taglist (open)
— Author Note: Guys, I'm back after a few months <3 It's finallyyyy hereee, I know it's big (I don't know how to write little when I get excited lmaooo sorry!!!) but I can guarantee you that it's fun since I wanted the story to give off rom-com vibes!! There are some specific legal concepts, but nothing too complicated to understand (I hope). I know that each country has its own legal system, so I used my country's legal system as a guide. Even though I proofread, it might have some typos. Anyways, I hope you guys like it ♡ If there are any errors pls lmk!!!

Since the beginning of human existence and during the formation of societies, law has been present. The norms and principles that governed ancient social groups were an archaic type of representation of what is known today as law. With the reformulation of how these laws should be formed after numerous social revolutions, law is still evolving, being considered one of the tools that keep human beings under control.
For some, the law itself is something to be feared, for others, something to be admired or somehow foreign. However, when it comes to law school, opinions differ.
For many laypeople, law school is a distant world, something unattainable and bureaucratic, that only forged and trained minds can reach. After all, dealing with the daily problems of human beings, but also understanding their treacherous nature requires a lot of vocation.
For Lee Heeseung, law is fascinating.
He finds it amazing the possibility to reach deep into society and cause a stir with some well-founded arguments. For Heeseung, there was a kind of freedom in knowing how the legal system in his country worked that fascinated him intrinsically. Heeseung has always been curious, especially because he wanted to understand why so many injustices could not be easily resolved. What was stopping a country from truly delivering justice?
But despite being an idealist, Heeseung learned that people can be hypocritical, cold, fake and especially selfish when it comes to something that is about their own interests. And perhaps that is the main reason why the system is so flawed.
Personally, Heeseung can't stand hypocrisy and in his opinion, everything about you screamed 'hypocrisy'. From the way you dressed and carried yourself to the way you spoke – everything irritated him. Initially, he didn't have this curious aversion towards you. He didn't really care about your presence, despite noticing that you drew attention wherever you went.
The hypnotized looks around you and the sneaky approaches trying to create some kind of bond with you demonstrated a clear situation: you were from an important family, or your beauty was a factor that contributed to that. This type of approach was expected within the law school, which was full of people who only cared about other people's backgrounds.
However, Heeseung only confirmed his suspicions when your surname began to be whispered in the hallways. Y/N Park, the famous daughter of a renowned attorney with a giant office in the city center.
Heeseung laughed at the irony: Of course, you are just another privileged rich girl who is only in college as a rite of passage with a ready and perfect pass to a job already premeditated by your father.
There were many people like this in law school, but for some unknown reason you affected Heeseung differently. The way you presented yourself perfectly, without any flaws, almost theatrically bothered him.
But even though he knew you were the type of girl he wouldn't want to get close to, his disdain began to increase after a specific episode. It all started when you were in Criminology class and there was a free debate going on about the ‘Historical Development of Criminology' and what impact it had on law in the modern world.
You were explaining about the evolution of the concept of crime, and how Cesare Beccaria had contributed to the Classical School of Criminology, in which the concept of crime is based on what is in the law with a focus on restoring social order and the criminal justice system, given that the free and conscious choice of a delinquent to commit a crime affected not only the victim, but the entire society.
According to your train of thought, there are social factors that influence people to commit petty crimes and that would eventually be appreciated in other modern schools. But even with your impeccable contribution, Heeseung couldn't take you seriously when he saw you using an overpriced bag while criticizing the dry theory of the classical school.
Heeseung was no fool, he knew that life wasn't fair and there would be people in better financial situations than him. In fact, he had fought hard to get into a good university and study law, so he had a pride about his academic achievements, but there was something about you that drove him crazy. He couldn't put it into words, but you triggered specific emotions in his brain — and the main one was agitation.
So, for every argument you brought up, he inevitably countered with something new. What was supposed to be just a friendly debate between classmates turned into a heated argument between you and him.
“I agree, however, if you allow me to make a brief criticism, we know that even with social issues involved, the key point of free will and the delinquent’s conscious choice to commit a crime – an argument that came from the classical school – is taken into consideration today as well.” Heeseung countered, making you sigh for having cut off your train of thought.
“Of course, but it doesn’t change the fact that social issues have a great weight in this matter.” You leaned over the table and he chuckled “Yes, I agree that they do have an influence, but you must admit that even with all the influence in the world, we know that it's not that simple to understand the conscience of an individual who commits crimes.”
Even though he didn't say much, Heeseung saw how irritated you were: you seemed out of breath, your eyebrows were furrowed, and your gaze was fixed on him. And it was at that exact moment — when your eyes locked for a few seconds and he smirked — that he knew that irritating you would be his new entertainment.
For the first time in his life, he had seen you make an expression other than your serious one or the one with that meticulously adjusted smile you gave when you wanted to appear overly polite. Seeing how he pressed the specific buttons to irritate you was the new entertainment that was missing in Heeseung's college life, and it made him more elated than it should have been.
And this brief rivalry that was born unexpectedly in a debate, continued to extend to test scores, projects and final evaluations in the following semesters. Heeseung couldn't deny that you were very intelligent because he had lost 1st place in many situations, but that didn't discourage him and instead motivated him even more, because each perfect 100 that he achieved and threw in your face was absolutely satisfying.
So Heeseung's college life became hectic, as he was the famous student brave enough to face the "queen" of the course.
The one and only— Lee Heeseung —the reason for your extra study sessions, as you swore you would never let yourself lose to Heeseung in any aspect of academic life.
After all, nothing was better than the feeling of beating Heeseung at the very game he created.
☆
Your reflection in the bedroom mirror seemed to show that everything was in perfect order. Your hair was neat, your clothes were well-ironed, and the hydrated glow of your skin was even more noticeable that late afternoon. But in reality, you were distracted, reflecting on your past.
When you were in high school, your father gave you two options for college:
1) Med school or 2) Law school. That's it.
Unfortunately, you had no choice or desire of your own regarding your future, because according to your father, all that mattered was studying something with a “financial return”. In a way, you understood your father's vision, because he was a man who had suffered from poverty and hunger in the past, and became who he is with a lot of pain and sacrifice. However, the pressure and responsibility that came with being his daughter were very heavy.
A man who had been brutalized by the hard life he had led could not think of other realities in life. Your father didn’t believe in “talents” or “gifts” that couldn’t pay the bills. It didn't matter how good you were at some sport or art-related hobby. If it didn’t bring money home it shouldn’t be pursued – or worse, desired and dreamed of.
When he wanted to talk to you about something specific, he would always call you to his personal office. The same office that you found terrifying because it was so impersonal. The dark gray walls, the low lighting, and the plain furniture, without any memorabilia, photos, or any kind of decoration that would indicate any personality trait — everything gave off a cold, indifferent, distant air.
Since work had consumed his life, you knew you had to take advantage of these minutes of interaction with your father. He would often sit there, typing and reading cases on the computer, with his attention 100% focused on the screen that must have contained sensitive information (that was what your curious mind used to believe).
“You understand, right sweetie? I only want the best for you.” Your father would often take your hand and squeeze it gently as wrinkles crept into the corners of his eyes with the small smile he gave you “Yes, father. I understand.” You would respond like a perfect little doll who obeyed without questioning his ideas.
But even though you’d done everything your father had told you to do up until now, you knew that this wasn't the path you wanted to follow forever.
You wanted options. Options for what to do with your future that didn’t involve working in your father’s office. This expectation that everyone around you has that you will become the next face of your father's office is like a weight that you have to carry, but you’ve already decided that your path will be different.
But no one besides your best friend knows about it.
Luckily, you had always liked law, so you had delved deeper into the careers you could pursue over time. The prosecutor's office seemed interesting, after all, criminal law is a passion of yours. Unlike your father, who liked corporate and civil law, which is why he had all kinds of demands in his office.
However, you could try to become an attorney at another firm and gain experience in another area of law. There were certainly many options for you to explore, and fortunately there was still time for you to figure out what you really wanted to do, and the next steps to take.
As you wandered through thoughts about your future, your best friend and roommate, Gaeul, snapped you out of your prolonged reverie.
“Are you going out?” she was holding a bag of potato chips when she appeared at your bedroom door “I’m going to another extra study session.” You gave her a delicate smile and picked up your bag before heading towards Gaeul who looked at you suspiciously “Again?”
“Sure, why not?” Gaeul sighed “You know you don’t have to do all of this to beat Heeseung.” she followed you through the small dorm “You’re already too good, I don’t understand this rivalry between you two.”
“Gaeul, it’s much more than rivalry.” You took out your keys to open the front door “It’s a matter of honor! I can’t lose to that prick.”
“Yeah, yeah. Sure...” she laughed before taking another bite of the potato chip “Have fun babe!” You blew an air kiss that made Gaeul make a funny face “I will!”
☆
The library was quiet, with the perfect atmosphere for a late afternoon study session. This time of day was always your favorite, the sun setting through the window and the tranquility of the place made the environment completely cozy, even if you had to read something grueling.
You were reading the work of a famous criminal law scholar when your peace was interrupted by the soft tapping of fingers on the table in front of you. “Busy?” Heeseung’s unmistakable ironic voice made you take a deep breath, trying not to get irritated by his mocking manner.
One of the rules you strictly follow is that you won’t interact with Lee Heeseung unless it is absolutely necessary. Even though you are a calm and reserved person, the slightest interaction with Heeseung somehow stresses you out.
“Can’t you see I’m obviously studying?” Heeseung felt the vein in his neck throb in irritation and clicked his tongue when he saw how you didn’t even look at his face to answer him.
“Well, I think you need to see this.” he placed the paper in front of your eyes. Reluctantly you placed the book on the table and held the sheet up, looking at the contents of what was there “What is this?” You asked in disbelief as you saw your name paired next to Heeseung’s under a title that said ‘international law project’.
“Are you surprised?” You turned to Heeseung with wide eyes “As you can see, we are partners in Mrs. Jung’s project.” for the first time that day, all of your focus faded in a matter of seconds.
'No. No. No. This couldn't be happening. Me and Lee Heeseung together? In a project?'
“What do you mean? How the hell did this happen?” Heeseung took the liberty of sitting next to you. He leaned back in his chair and ran his hand through his hair “I don’t know either. Earlier I was leaving an extracurricular activity when Jay called me to look at the bulletin board because the pairings for the new project in the international law class had been announced.”
You stopped for a moment and began to remember that in the last international law class, Mrs. Jung had said that there would be a new project for that semester and that she didn't like to draw pairs, so she would choose the pairs herself.
And with the immense luck you had, she decided that the partner who would suit you best would be Lee Heeseung, out of the entire class.
“When I got close to the mural, Jay was staring at me with a hilarious face.” Heeseung gave a clearly frustrated sigh as he ran his hand over his face “I just didn’t expect it to be because of this.”
“This has to be a mistake.” It couldn’t be true. You couldn’t believe this was happening.
“Unfortunately, it’s true, and there’s nothing you can do about it.” Your eyebrows furrowed at Heeseung, who seemed too resigned for your liking “I’m not going to do this project with you, I– we have to talk to the teacher.”
Heeseung gave you a wry laugh “You can try talking to her, but it won’t work.” he picked up the paper from the table and analyzed the names again as if to confirm that it was real “The seniors already told me that Mrs. Jung is strict and doesn’t make exceptions. She never changes her plan.”
Your stomach began to feel heavy with the anxiety that was building up. You also heard these rumors from a senior who had given you tips about the worst teachers she had to deal with.
“I don’t care, I’ll talk to her.”
“Do whatever you want, I warned you.” Heeseung gave you one last pitiful look and got up from his chair “Are you going to leave like that? We need to talk about this.” he looked at you and shrugged his shoulders putting his hands in his coat pockets “The teacher isn’t here right now, we’ll look into this tomorrow.”
If there was something about Heeseung that really stressed you out, it was his attitude like he knew everything and had everything under control. As if he was better than everyone else.
“But we need to align what should be said!” You countered and Heeseung sighed, running his thumb and index finger over his furrowed eyebrows “God, you’re so annoying.”
Your breath stopped for a moment. How could Lee Heeseung have the audacity to call you annoying? Him of all people? The most insufferable person of all?
“What did you say?!” You stood up from your chair “Say that again!”
He smirked and took a step closer to you “You’re annoying.” Your blood was boiling as his face was just above yours “Everything about you irritates me.”
“Look who’s talking.” You scoffed and pointed at Heeseung with your index finger “You’re completely unbearable and you want to talk about me?”
Heeseung's jaw clenched, and you smirked, seeing how he was also clearly irritated by your response "Heeseung, I'm gonna be honest with you. I think you're just an arrogant prick, and I have no interest in working with you." You gave him a false smile while he frowned.
"Well, I feel the same." he said through gritted teeth and walked away "We'll sort this out tomorrow."
"Great." You took the paper and put it inside your book and closed it. Your desire to study had completely disappeared, and now you needed to think about how to talk to Mrs. Jung, because no way in hell you are going to pair up with Heeseung.
No way.
☆
The international law class was lasting longer than usual that Wednesday.
Your legs were shaking as anxiety corroded your entire body. Heeseung looked calm, his head resting on his right hand as he sat a few chairs in front of you. He had no idea of the storm that was happening inside you.
You had to convince the teacher that she needed to choose another partner for you. Anyone would do, even the slowest human being you could handle, except Lee Heeseung. Not him. Doing a project with him would be extremely stressful. You even felt a pang in your head when you imagined the stupid arguments you would have over simple things.
The truth is that initially you didn't care much for Heeseung, but you started to notice that since the beginning of college he did everything he could to talk back to you. He could never agree with you 100%, no matter the topic. So over time you started to nurture these feelings of rivalry and irritation towards him.
It was unbearable how he acted as if he was better than you and tried to prove it at all costs. That's why you made the decision to never let him surpass you, even in simple college activities. You would beat Lee Heeseung, even if it cost you a few more hours of studying.
However, now with this shared project this would certainly be a problem.
When class ended and the students left one by one, Heeseung calmly put his materials in his bag, as if he knew that his stoicism would irritate you. Mrs. Jung was sitting in her chair as she finished organizing some papers when you slowly approached.
“Uh, excuse me, Mrs. Jung. Can I have a few words with you?” Your soft voice drew the teacher’s attention away from her papers, who smiled back at you “Oh, miss Park, of course. How can I help you?”
You bit your lower lip hesitantly as the teacher looked at you carefully “It’s about the recent international law project; I saw that it’s going to be in pairs.” the teacher’s smile widened “Yes, I think it will be a great project for you.” she stood up from her chair holding the sheets “Is there a problem?”
“Actually, there is.” You were hoping internally that your nervousness wouldn’t show too much “I noticed that you chose Heeseung to be my partner, but since we’re not very close, I don’t think it’ll work out.” the teacher’s eyes seemed attentive to you “Then I’d like to ask about the possibility of changing partners.”
Mrs. Jung gave you a small sigh before offering you a gentle smile “Unfortunately, that won’t be possible, miss Park. Since I’ve already separated all the pairs, they’ve already started their research. Besides, it would be problematic to disrupt this entire system because of a request.” You started to feel despair set in your bones “I understand, Mrs. Jung, but it really will be difficult to work with Hees–”
“Miss Park, I chose Heeseung to be your partner because I think you two would be a great pair.” she interrupted you, leaving you speechless “What do you mean?”
The teacher seemed to think for a moment “I think you are a good match. You bring out the best in each other, and I think you will do a fabulous job with this research.”
Heeseung had arrived at exactly this time and stood frozen beside you.
“But—” You were cut off again by the teacher “The pairings will not be changed and this is final, miss Park. Okay?”
“Alright… Thank you for listening to me, Mrs. Jung.” she smiled before grabbing her bag “You’re welcome. I’m looking forward to seeing what you guys come up with.”
Heeseung watched you from the corner of his eye as the teacher left first. You were paralyzed as if a lightning had struck you.
“I told you she wouldn’t change her mind.” he broke the silence and you grimaced in pain.
“Oh, shut up.” You left first trying to accept the idea that you would have to put up with Heeseung as your partner for the rest of the semester.

Heeseung was having an internal debate as he waited for class to end. He didn't know whether he should talk to you and decide to start this research right away or wait for you to say something.
He had sat a few chairs behind you and saw how focused you seemed in class. For the first time this semester, he couldn't pay attention to what was being taught. How was he going to work with the girl he couldn't stand? And worse: for an entire semester? Not even in his worst dreams did he imagine something like this would happen.
As he pondered what to do, Jake glared at him with the corner of his eye “Dude, you’re making a scary face.”
Heeseung looked away and ran his hand through his dark hair “Sorry, I was distracted.”
“Distracted?” Jake smirked “You looked like a creepy staring at her.” Heeseung sighed “I have to do the international law project with her.”
Jake put his hand over his mouth to contain the laugh that was threatening to escape “Oh man, you’re screwed.”
“I know.” Heeseung leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, trying to calm himself “I need to talk to her.”
“Good luck.” Jake gave him a side smile and shook his head as Heeseung remained with his eyes closed.
When class ended, Heeseung gathered all the courage he had and walked towards you. You also looked haggard. Although your clothes were perfect and your hair was as shiny as ever, the circles under your eyes showed your tiredness as you put your materials in your bag.
A small smile began to form on Heeseung’s face, but he held it back. He couldn’t laugh at your face when he knew that he also had to accept the reality that you would have to put up with each other for the next few months.
“Hey.” that was all Heeseung could say as he watched you approach him “Hi.” Your dry response made the atmosphere heavy.
“I need your phone number to schedule the meetings about our project.” he was trying to be civil, no one could complain about that.
You sighed, showing your clear lack of interest in any conversation with him “Okay.”
Heeseung was really holding back his sharp mouth, but you weren't making it easy.
The way your hand handed your phone while you looked away irritated Heeseung deeply “Do you always have to be this petty?”
“What?” You asked confused as he finished putting his number into your phone “Can’t you interact for 5 minutes without being petty? Is it that hard?”
In your mind you couldn't believe what you were hearing. Lee Heeseung wanting to lecture you about pettiness?
“What the hell are you talking about? You’re the one who can’t go 5 minutes without criticizing anything I do.” Heeseung bit his lower lip, trying to hold his tongue. He was already upset, and you weren’t helping.
“Probably because you don’t make it easier?” he sighed and ran his fingertips over his temples, trying to regain his former calm state “You know what, forget about it. Have you saved my number?” his patience was running out, and so was yours.
“Yes, unfortunately.” You whispered the last part, which didn’t go unnoticed by Heeseung.
“See you after class.” he put his phone in his pocket and his backpack on his right shoulder.
You just nodded and left first.
'Yeah, this is really going to be difficult.' Heeseung thought before leaving the room with his mind messed up by the simple interaction you two had.
☆
The library was relatively crowded, but since you previously arranged with Heeseung, you managed to arrive together at the same time.
“Well, look at that. Lee Heeseung isn’t late, I'm surprised.” You teased as you sat down and took your laptop out of your bag.
“Tsk.” Heeseung clicked his tongue as he placed his notebooks on the table “Of course. The sooner we start, the sooner I can leave.” he replied, thinking about how he wanted this torture to end once and for all.
“Finally you said something I agree with.” You retorted as you opened a blank Word document and began sorting through your materials.
Heeseung had already noticed that you liked everything organized. Your materials were always organized in the same way: pens, laptop and a notebook lined up.
“Well, do you have any ideas or suggestions on what we can do?” Heeseung was a little surprised by your question, after all, he expected you to decide everything at once and create a big fight if he disagreed.
“I think this subject is too extensive, we can’t do a generic theme.” You nodded as you stared at the laptop screen “That makes sense. I think we should dive deeper into some specific subjects.”
“I usually research and read about the subject superficially before diving into complicated concepts.” Heeseung showed the sheet of paper from his notebook that had some sketches of past summaries he had done in other subjects.
“International law is a pain because if we read about everything, we’ll waste a lot of time.” You commented, scratching your head, feeling frustrated “Let’s choose some subjects we like and see which ones are the best.”
“Fine.” Heeseung just wanted to get it over with.
For the next 10 minutes you were in complete silence. As if it was a silent mutual agreement that you would only speak if it was absolutely necessary.
Interestingly, the discomfort was bearable. Was it strange that you were sitting side by side without saying anything? Yes, but at least when you didn't say anything, you didn't fight, and that was enough for the moment.
“These are my suggestions.” You looked at the list Heeseung had made, but one suggestion in particular caught your eye.
“Post-war law?” You tilted your head to the side “It’s too generic and complicated, we need to think about it.” Heeseung sighed “How can this be too generic? It’s literally about the law after wars.”
You mockingly laughed “Exactly. What kind of wars are you talking about? Because we can’t talk about every war in existence.” Heeseung felt a stab of anger in his head.
“So, what are your suggestions, genius?” Heeseung’s pejorative tone wasn’t enough to make you lose your patience, so you turned the laptop screen to show your contribution.
“We can talk about certain differences in the legal system in some countries and filter out only the most interesting ones.” Heeseung snorted and pointed at your laptop screen “That’s as generic as my suggestion!”
“Of course not!” clearly the discussion would not end there “We can only choose a few countries.”
“And we could talk about a few wars, for example the most famous ones? Like World War I or World War II?” his ironic tone gave you the creeps, in a bad way.
“It’s still a very simple theme, we should do something more elaborated.” You turned your laptop screen towards you and Heeseung took a deep breath.
“And isn’t your topic simple?” he approached you and looked into your eyes “You just want to do what’s convenient for you, as always.”
“What do you mean by that?” The tone of your voice clearly showed that you were now very mad. How could Heeseung make a single task so difficult?
“Forget it, you wouldn’t understand.” he whispered, clearly irritated.
Another 10 minutes of complete silence. Neither you nor Heeseung wanted to say anything else. It was clear that this would be a difficult task, but you tried to be rational and calm down.
What was at stake here was your grade, your academic record, and your future. You couldn't let Heeseung be an obstacle in your path.
“Look, let’s get one thing straight.” You turned to Heeseung who gave you a lazy look “It’s clear we don’t like each other.”
“Hm.” Heeseung nodded and waved his hands in the air as if he wanted you to get to the point quickly.
“But I don’t care about that. What I really care about is my grades, so if I have to do this damn project with you, I’ll do it.” Heeseung kept looking at you, waiting for you to finish “So, if you put your childishness aside for a moment and really help me, we’ll be able to finish this today.”
You were clearly nervous and out of patience.
“Then, can you please cooperate with me?” Heeseung somehow felt a bit remorseful, thinking that perhaps he had overreacted with the way you seemed to beg for the two of you to end this quickly.
“Okay, we clearly can’t reach a consensus, so let’s use another method.” he pulled his chair closer to you “What are you doing?”
“What do you like?” his bright, dark eyes stared into yours with intensity “What are you most comfortable with in international law?”
“I like the criminal part.” You whispered a little shyly as he got closer to you “Good.” Heeseung began to write in his notebook “I like the human rights part, especially the Post-World War II issue.”
You watched as he outlined the topics you both liked.
“Let’s research these themes and at the next meeting we’ll decide what to do.” he said and leaned back in his chair, looking at you.
“Okay. This might work.” You nodded, thinking it might be a good idea.
“It’ll work.” There it was. The tone of absolute certainty in Heeseung’s voice that usually irritated you, but this time you were satisfied that you had managed to reach a consensus.
“Okay, I’ll start now.” You stood up and headed towards some books in the international law section of the library, while Heeseung decided to research on the internet.
The rest of the meeting you were silent, researching the topics, but this time it wasn't awkward or heavy. You were just two students focusing on what you needed to do.
And that was enough for now.

“So, how is your international law project going?” Jay brought up the topic while he, Jake, and Heeseung were gathered in the campus cafeteria.
“Don’t remind me of that.” he sighed as he sipped on a soda “We managed to have a fight before the first meeting.”
“Damn, you guys are too complicated.” Jake commented with a smile “Luckily my partner on the project is Jay.” he fist bumped Jay.
“You guys are lucky. We’re trying to be civil, but sometimes it’s unavoidable not to get angry.” Jay narrowed his eyes as he studied his friend trying to understand why Heeseung seemed so reactive to you “You guys should see the way she acts. It’s like she does this on purpose to irritate me!”
“Can you believe the Mrs. Jung said she put us together because she thought we were a good match?” Heeseung gave a wry smile while Jake and Jay looked at each other with a knowing look and mocking smiles “She said I brought out the best in her, some shit like that.”
“Well, I somewhat agree.” Jay countered Heeseung “Since you two started interacting, you’ve become more dedicated to your studies.”
“Real, brother. You worry more about her than yourself when exam week comes.” Jake blurted out, and Jay laughed, making Heeseung stunned by his friend's confession.
“I can’t believe I’m hearing this.” Heeseung sighed “I don’t care about her. I just like being the best in the class! That’s all.”
Jay smirked and put his arm around his friend's shoulder “Sure, sure… but you can't deny she's hot.”
Heeseung stood frozen in place at what Jay had said. He wasn't blind, he knew you were a beautiful woman, but that didn't change the fact that you were annoying to him.
“None of that changes the fact that she’s annoying.” Heeseung looked away as Jake and Jay chuckled.
“In my opinion, I think you lowkey admire her, but you can’t admit it and that’s why you act like that.” Jake teased Heeseung who was stunned “Just admit you’re into her man, it’s okay.” Jay said and Jake snickered “Huh? You guys are crazy.” he got up from his chair and decided to leave while Jay and Jake laughed.
“C'mon Heeseung! Don't run away like that!” Jake and Jay stood up and decided to follow him while Heeseung went ahead.
So what if you were pretty and attractive? That didn't change anything.
You were still the rich girl he couldn't stand.
☆
After a few days of research, you and Heeseung decided to have a meeting to decide on the final theme for your project.
It was already 16:24 in the afternoon and he still hadn't arrived, which was strange because Heeseung was always on time. Being late for more than 20 minutes wasn't like him.
Before you could text him, Heeseung hurried into the library. He was more casual than ever, wearing a dark gray sweater and a beanie, and you noticed that he was pale with slightly red cheeks and nose.
“Sorry for the delay, something’s got in the way.” he sounded haggard and strangely tired. His voice was hoarser than usual and you could tell he wasn’t doing very well.
“Are you okay?” You asked worriedly. Even though he was annoying, he clearly didn’t look okay “If you’re not okay, we can postpone it and–”
“I'm fine.” he cut you off in a harsh tone “Let's get this over with.” You stared at him in disbelief at the way he was acting.
“Wow.” You spoke ironically and didn’t hold back “Heeseung, what the hell is wrong with you?”
He closed his eyes temporarily, trying not to say anything. As if any noise would hurt like hell inside his head.
“I was just worried because you’re clearly not okay. If you want to be a jerk, then you can be by yourself.” You got up from the chair trying to leave and Heeseung grabbed your wrist “Let go of me.” You looked at his hand around your wrist and felt tortured by how soft and large his hand was compared to yours.
“I’m sorry.” Heeseung opened his eyes slightly and looked at you in a way that you swore you almost saw some kind of affection “Don’t go, please.”
You swallowed hard and sat back down on the chair, seeing how regretful Heeseung looked. “I didn’t mean to be rude, it’s just…” he sighed as if he didn’t want to admit his weakness “The truth is, I caught a cold and I’m not feeling very well, but I didn’t want to postpone our meeting.”
“Heeseung, you’re sick! We can do this in a few days, we still have time.” You looked at Heeseung with pity, who coughed a little “You need to recover, come on.”
He let go of your wrist, turning his gaze to you, who stood up again “But what about choosing the theme for our project?” he clearly seemed worried about the project, and you sighed.
“You’re not in a position to study, you need to prioritize your health.” Heeseung watched you grab your bag “We’ll decide that after you recover.”
Heeseung just nodded. At that moment he didn't want to argue or study, he just wanted his bed and sleep for the next 10 hours straight.
“Come on, I’ll accompany you.” You waited for Heeseung to leave first and followed him, after all, how could you trust a guy who was clearly sick.
Before he could leave campus, you bought a warm drink from a vending machine that was right next to the door.
“Here.” You handed the can to Heeseung “It’s good for you, it’s orange juice so it must have vitamin C.”
“Okay, thanks mom.” he replied and your eyes widened at his audacity “Hey!”
“I was joking, silly.” Heeseung gave you a smirk that disconcerted you.
It was the first time he had ever genuinely smiled at you. It wasn't a mocking smile or a fake smile after he said the most passive-aggressive thing possible. He was actually giving you a genuine, real smile.
And you definitely didn't want to admit that he had a very beautiful smile.
“Well, uh… anyways, take your medicine and recover. We’ll reschedule the meeting.” he looked down at the hot drink and gave you another smile before looking back at you. “Okay, see you later.” He – shockingly – kindly said “Thank you.” his gaze was fixed on yours, and for some reason, it made you feel embarrassed.
“It’s nothing.” You looked away “See you later.”
He gave you one last smile before leaving first. As you watched him walk away you began to wonder what kind of man Lee Heeseung was, who insisted on going to your meeting even though he was sick.
☆
You were choosing a movie to watch with Gaeul when your phone vibrated. Gaeul was putting the freshly popped popcorn in the bowl when you saw on your phone that surprisingly Heeseung had texted you.
[Lee Heestupid] — Hey
[Lee Heestupid] — Just wanted to say thank you for the orange juice.
21:46 pm
You smiled a little, seeing that he had the courage to send you a message about something that isn’t your project.
[You] — It's nothing. Are you feeling better?
21:48 pm
[Lee Heestupid] — Yeah, I'm way better now.
[Lee Heestupid] — If you're free, let's meet tomorrow for our project.
21:51 pm
[You] — Sure, it works for me.
21:52 pm
[Lee Heestupid] — Great
[Lee Heestupid] — See you then
21:53pm
[You] — See you.
21:53pm
“Who are you talking to?” Gaeul asked suspiciously as she approached your couch “I was just rescheduling the project meeting with Heeseung.” You locked your phone and tapped the fabric of the couch next to you indicating that you wanted her to sit there.
She stopped in her tracks and gave you a mischievous smile, looking at you. “I can’t believe you were smiling like that while you were texting Heeseung.” You rolled your eyes at Gaeul's suggestive tone “What do you mean? I was normal.” You looked away to the TV “Nuh-uh.” She was clearly enjoying the whole thing “I think you’re starting to like him after all this time.”
“Girl, you’re crazy.” You sighed thinking about Gaeul’s fertile mind and she sat next to you hugging your arm “Come on, admit that you changed your conception of him. Even if it’s just a little.”
You paused for a moment and thought “He’s still insufferable, but this time he was polite.” Gaeul chuckled, taking a handful of popcorn. “Oh, this is going to be interesting.”
“Babe, let’s just watch the movie.” You changed the subject and Gaeul was laughing beside you “Okaaaay.”
☆
As much as you didn't want to admit it, the atmosphere between you and Heeseung had certainly changed a bit. It was noticeable that although his thoughtless sarcasm hadn't changed, you two fought less about your project. Heeseung's posture was still as confident as ever, but a part of you had gotten used to this eccentric trait of his. Maybe he was naturally like this in any area of his life, or maybe he was forced to be like this.
“While I was recovering, I thought about how to combine our interests in our project.” Heeseung looked much better. His face had a healthy glow, his lips were pinker and, curiously, you noticed how his nose was perfectly shaped. Did he always have this insane profile?
“What’s your suggestion?” You asked, adjusting your seat, trying to dispel the strange thoughts that were distracting you “We can talk about criminal accountability and the evolution of post-war human rights within international law.”
You thought for a moment “That might work.” The smile that formed on your face didn’t go unnoticed by Heeseung who was taken aback “It’s just going to be harder than expected, since it’s a topic that we’re going to have to delve into in depth so we can’t leave any gaps.”
“I accept the challenge.” He smirked while looking into your eyes “And what about you? Are you scared?” You rolled your eyes, seeing how he never misses an opportunity to tease you.
“Of course not.” You snorted “You know I never run away from a challenge. After all, I’m the best in the class.” Heeseung’s eyebrow twitched slightly at your insinuation “Actually, we’re tied and you know it.”
“Fine, maybe you’re right.” You sighed “But it doesn’t change the fact that we’ll have to work hard with this topic.” Heeseung gave an airy laugh through his nose seeing how excited you were “Indeed, but at least we were able to officially set the theme of our project.”
“Now we need to define the next steps.” You stretched your arms and Heeseung couldn’t help but see part of your waist when your shirt rose slightly “I guess that’s a good idea, because we also have to study for that civil law presentation in three weeks.” He looked away to the screen of his laptop.
You widened your eyes and turned to Heeseung “Oh my God, I thought it would be in a month!” Opening your tablet's calendar you came across the date marked on a Tuesday in three weeks “I was so worried about our project that I lost track of time.”
“You're welcome.” Heeseung said without looking at you as he researched the subjects he needed to study for your project “It seems like I’m taking up too much of your mind for you to forget a presentation.” He snickered and you grimaced.
“Ugh, you wish.” You sighed as you typed on your laptop causing Heeseung to give you an enigmatic smile.
Yeah. As you thought, Lee Heeseung was still a pain in the ass.

Miraculously, after weeks of not going out, Heeseung was at a party. Contrary to what many people think, Heeseung doesn't go out to many parties. Since he has a scholarship to take care of, his main focus is on studying. However, when he has some free time, he allows himself the luxury of enjoying some kind of fun.
Today was no different as Jake managed to convince him that he needed to clear his head after being sick.
Since part of the international law project was well underway and he had made progress on his civil law assignment, he allowed himself to relax for a few hours at that random party on a Friday. Jake and Jay seemed more lively, taking advantage of the opportunity to play beer pong with boys from other courses.
Heeseung had been drinking for a while now, but nothing seemed very interesting. The music was great, but he was still feeling tired from working twice as hard during the week, so he decided to sit on an old couch that was empty. As he slowly drank, he began to analyze his surroundings, and noticed that he was surrounded by couples or people who were there with the aim of flirting and hooking up with someone.
Personally, Heeseung didn't have many girlfriends. He had gone on a few dates, talked to a few girls, and even had a serious girlfriend for a year and a few months during high school, but nothing had lasted that long. Life hadn't been easy for Heeseung's family, so all he could think about was how he needed to help out at home with the money from tiring part-time jobs and how to pay for his upcoming college expenses.
Love was a distant topic for Heeseung.
Most of the time he was worried about his future and the reality he wanted to improve. That's why love and relationships were foreign subjects on his mind. Jake used to say that he needed to relax a bit and at least try to meet someone during college, but he was too busy.
Too busy studying, working and self-improving but mainly busy thinking about you.
The amount of times you wandered through his mind seemed unhealthy. It was as if you were always there unconsciously, terrorizing the corners of Heeseung's mind. Like a presence he couldn't get rid of, like you were a sticker glued in the album of his thoughts.
He always swore he didn't care much about your appearance, but his breath caught for a moment when from afar he saw you with a short black skirt and a brown turtleneck blouse clinging to your torso. Heeseung felt his body sober up in an instant and he leaned over his knees so he could confirm his suspicion.
That shiny hair and that unique smile were unmistakable in his eyes. Yes, it was you.
Heeseung swallowed hard and felt strange for not being able to take his eyes off you. “Sure, sure… but you can't deny she's hot.” Jay's sentence from that day kept echoing in Heeseung's mind as he tried to convince himself that this was no big deal.
You've always been beautiful. No, you're always impeccable. As if you never had a bad day, you're always well-tied up, wearing a sweet perfume, unbeatable, gorgeous... stunning. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing. In a way, your determination to always show your best version is impressive, especially in the world of law where Heeseung knows how much appearances matter.
But he never really stopped to look at you. Heeseung’s judgment was always clouded by his anger at what you represented. At the spoiled, privileged girl who would never experience what it was like to suffer from not having enough money for leisure or having every penny counted to pay the bills.
Your existence was almost an affront to him—even though you had never done anything to him.
But even though he knew all of this. Even though he had convinced himself that you were his rival, his eyes couldn't take their eyes off your figure. Maybe it was the alcohol in his system, or the fatigue, but your legs seemed even more toned under the dark blue light of the place.
He swallowed hard, seeing how your eyes seemed to sparkle as you talked to a girl beside you that he assumed it was your best friend. Have you always had an outfit that adorned your waist flawlessly like that?
'It's okay, I can admire a beautiful woman.' Heeseung argued in his own mind as if he needed to justify himself for the thoughts he was having at that moment.
Thoughts of how hauntingly attractive you are.
Heeseung bent the cup he was holding a little from squeezing it so hard and ran his hand over his face. He was wondering if he should talk to you or just let it go. Even if he decided to go to you, what would he say? 'Hi, good to see you project partner.'? Absolutely not. That would be too pathetic of him.
After a few seconds of struggling, he decided to stay still. It could have been really awkward if he tried to say something out of the blue. Besides, you were with your friend, so he decided he wouldn't bother you.
However, as if life was playing tricks on Heeseung, he saw a weird man approaching you. A guy he had seen before at the party, and who was clearly not feeling well after drinking way past his limits. From afar Heeseung watched with his eyes as the clueless guy approached and tried to say something to you, which showed instant discomfort.
When the guy dared to touch your shoulder, Heeseung stood up at the same time, feeling his blood boil. You had a frown on your face and were obviously saying no. Even with the loud music, he could tell that you weren't enjoying that approach by the gestures you were making as you got away from the guy.
As he couldn't contain himself, Heeseung stomped towards him and pushed the guy back hard with his forearm. In a single movement he hugged your waist and pulled you towards him, slamming your back into his chest.
“Hey! Are you stupid? She said no!” Heeseung spoke harshly and you turned your face to him, shocked by the situation “Get the hell out of here, son of a bitch!”
“Ahh shi–” before the guy could finish his sentence Heeseung pushed him hard and the guy staggered back while cursing some swear words. The people around started staring at the guy who was clearly drunk and out of his mind.
“Let’s get out of here.” He whispered in your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. You just nodded and turned around with Heeseung as the other guy walked away aimlessly, bumping into other people.
As Heeseung led you through the crowd, your heart was racing. In less than 10 minutes of partying, Gaeul had gone to the bathroom, a drunk man disturbed you, Heeseung had saved you and now had his arm behind your back and his right hand firmly gripped on your waist while the other made room for you to pass.
It was almost like a scene from a movie where the security guard makes room for the protagonist to pass without touching anyone.
Your mind was spiraling when you arrived at the backyard near the kitchen that didn't have many people and had a bench for you to sit on. Heeseung let go of you and closed the kitchen door behind him seeing how shocked you looked at everything that happened.
“Are you okay?” Heeseung’s gentle tone made you finally look at him that night.
Your breath hitched and your mouth hung open seeing that he was wearing a white tank top showing his collarbone, a silver chain over it, an open dark gray jacket and dark jeans.
“Yes...” You felt your cheeks heat up as you noticed how his intense dark eyes didn’t look away from yours “Thank you, Heeseung.” You shyly mumbled feeling your stomach stir as he sighed, running his hand through his hair which was slightly messy, showing a bit of his forehead.
Even if you wanted to deny it, it would be an obvious lie, because clearly Lee Heeseung was so hot that you were at a loss for words.
“Are you sure you’re okay? I can get you a water or something.” He looked genuinely concerned and didn't know what to do to make you feel better, but you smiled gently. “It’s okay, really.” You sighed in relief “You really helped me out back there. Thank you.”
“It’s nothing, as a man it’s what I should do.” He sat down next to you “That guy is an idiot; I should’ve kicked his ass.” You laughed and propped your face on the back of your hand looking at Heeseung “It would have been great entertainment, but you don’t need to harm yourself because of a drunk idiot.”
Heeseung allowed himself to relax after what happened “I guess you’re right… but what really matters is that you’re okay.”
“I am, thanks to you who saved me.” Heeseung gave an almost imperceptible smile, slightly embarrassed by the tone of your voice, but he calmed down when he saw how you looked fine and out of danger. You continued to observe Heeseung's face thinking how curious it was how different he looked when he genuinely smiled.
Heeseung's smile is splendid, like the perfect complement to his handsome profile.
He turned to you and suddenly you felt aware of his gaze.
“To be honest, I was surprised to see you here.” Heeseung confessed “I don’t remember seeing you at the parties I went to.”
He noticed how you gave a weak smile and looked up at the starry sky “It’s because I’ve only been to a few parties since I came to college.”
“Because of studies?” He asked and you nodded “That’s all I care about honestly.”
He gave an empathetic side smile “I know how it is… I can’t fail my grades.”
“You gotta be on top of the class, don’t you?” You teased him with your sarcastic tone and he rolled his eyes smiling “It’s not just that.”
“So, what’s the reason?” You turned and asked him, feeling curious, as he looked at you for a few brief seconds.
Heeseung hesitated for a moment as he didn't know what your stance would be towards his answer, but a part of him wanted to be honest.
“It’s because I need to keep my scholarship.” He confessed and looked at you hesitantly, expecting some kind of exaggerated reaction. Maybe a joke, disdain or humiliation, but he was surprised by your bright face.
“A scholarship?! Wow, that’s impressive!” You were surprised and your face showed it “I had no idea you were a scholarship holder, that’s amazing! Only the best students get a scholarship in our course.”
Heeseung was stunned by your reaction. Maybe he had misjudged you for expecting the worst, but your relationship wasn't the best, so he didn't know what to expect.
"I mean, it's not that impressive. I just worked my ass off to get this scholarship, so yeah... I need to keep it.” Heeseung scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. He didn’t know how to react to being praised, especially a compliment coming from you. His rival.
For Heeseung, the feeling of receiving recognition from someone who doesn't like him very much is more real and impactful than anyone else. Especially because you have all the weapons to criticize him, so receiving a praise from you hits different.
“It’s just the truth.” You moved a little closer to Heeseung, adjusting your skirt, making him glance at your smooth thighs “You know, I just realized something.”
Heeseung’s eyes rose and met yours again “What?”
“I think this is the first time we’ve talked about something that doesn’t have to do with our project.” You laughed and he noticed the gloss you were wearing. Your lips were shining in a mesmerizing way.
“You’re right…” He smiled “I mean, you haven’t cursed at me yet, so I say it’s an improvement.”
“Huh?” You dramatically let out a breath of air and pointed at him. “Heeseung, drop the act. You’re the one who always provokes me and starts bickering.”
Without letting go of eye contact, he brought his face closer to yours and you suddenly felt butterflies in your stomach “You’re not innocent either, you’re always teasing me.” He whispered, making you snort and look away.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Heeseung laughed and you noticed how warm the sound of his laugh was “Yeah, let’s pretend you don’t know.”
You were surprised. He seemed different that night, as if he wasn't the Heeseung you knew. The rival you felt so much despise for.
Beneath that serene air he looked like just a normal college boy. And you liked that — but you wouldn’t admit it to him.
“I need a drink.” You suddenly commented and he looked at you “Me too.” Heeseung got up from the bench and stood in front of you “Let’s go inside, the party isn’t over yet.”
“I know and Gaeul must be worried about me.” You stood up sighing thinking about how you’ll have to find your best friend in the middle of the crowd.
“Ladies first.” Heeseung opened the kitchen door and made room for you to go in first.
You rolled your eyes with a smile and walked through the door with your arms crossed “Who would have thought… Lee Heeseung is such a gentleman.”
Heeseung smiled and whispered as you stood beside him “There are still many things about me that you don’t know.”
Heeseung's deep voice was like sweet poison that seemed to penetrate your skin with ease. You swallowed hard, feeling your body heat up slightly, and just walked in without saying anything.
Normally you hated losing any kind of argument with Heeseung, but tonight you would let it slide.
As the night unfolded and you entered the venue together again, Gaeul watched the interaction from afar with a satisfied smile on her face.
Heeseung and you together? Without fighting? You guys would definitely talk about it later.
☆
“Okay girl, spill.” Gaeul leaned against the doorway of your room as you changed the sheets on your bed “What the hell happened between you and Heeseung?”
“What do you mean?” You pretended not to understand her insinuation as you finished fluffing the pillows so you could lie down.
“You know what I'm talking about.” Gaeul came in and sat on your bed, looking at you with that look she only did when she wanted to tease you “I saw you and Heeseung interacting at the party.”
“And what about it?” Gaeul sighed at your stubbornness “I thanked him for helping me with a drunk idiot there who tried to hit on me.”
“What do you mean? Did something happen?” Your best friend looked at you worriedly and you sat down next to her “It was nothing big. When you went to the bathroom a guy was completely wasted and tried to hit on me, but Heeseung helped me.”
Gaeul put her hands over her mouth in shock and her eyebrows furrowed “Babeee, I didn’t know! I’m sorry I left you alone, I never imagined something like this would happen.” She touched your hand and you smiled.
“It’s okay Gaeul, I’m fine.” You squeezed your best friend’s hand, and she smiled sweetly.
“Sooo, you were saying Heeseung saved you?” She looked at you with a teasing face and you laughed “He helped me, like a good human being, okay?”
“Girl, there’s no point in hiding it. I know something has changed between you two.” She seemed 100% convinced and you just rolled your eyes “You’re very creative Gaeul.”
“Come on, don’t tell me you didn’t feel anything different after he saved you.” She approached you, watching you ponder her question for a moment.
In fact, since that event and the brief conversation in the backyard, you started to see Heeseung in a different light. Not to mention how much more attractive he seemed.
“Okay, maybe he’s not that bad.” You confessed and Gaeul’s eyes widened, and her mouth opened in shock.
“Oh. My. God. You totally like Lee Heeseung!!!!” Gaeul stood up excitedly and you made a face “And don’t try to deny it! Your eyes don’t lie! You’re falling for your rival!”
You chuckled and shook your head “Gaeul, I don’t like him, I just think he’s improved as a person… that’s all.”
Before leaving your room, she turned and looked at you with affection and a sweet smile on her lips “Okay, you can keep denying it. But just know that when you are ready to admit your feelings, I’ll be here for you.”
You sighed knowing that Gaeul wouldn't change her mind about this.
But you couldn't help but feel that strange feeling deep in your chest when you remembered how he had held your waist tightly and protected you. The way his eyebrows were furrowed showing the anger he was feeling against that idiot on your behalf. How protective he was at that moment…
His strong hands, along with the bright smile he gave you and how his dark hair seemed to fall perfectly over his forehead.
Okay, you can admit that Lee Heeseung is attractive, but that doesn't mean you like him.
Right?

Heeseung was walking down the halls while Jay was talking about some random basketball topic when he saw your beautiful figure from afar grabbing his attention. You were stunning, as always, but you looked different.
You were smiling as you watched something interesting a boy was showing you on his phone. He recognized the boy as Jungwon, the president of one of the clubs you were a part of. Heeseung couldn't help but feel awkward about the scene. You looked so comfortable and relaxed as you talked to the boy who was undeniably handsome and put together.
A wave of sour feelings flooded Heeseung's chest. His throat tightened, and he swallowed hard, trying not to make it too obvious how much he was staring at you. Heeseung, who had always had this chill aura, felt insanely bothered when he saw how excited the boy seemed while he was making you smile so easily.
It was nothing special. Even he could make you smile if he wanted to, there was nothing special about this guy.
“Hey man, are you listening?” Jay asked and Heeseung looked away trying to ignore the dissatisfaction bubbling inside him “Sorry, can you repeat?” He ran his hand through his hair and Jay sighed “Dude, if you’re going to be jealous of her, please be more discreet, you look like a creepy staring at her like that.” Heeseung dumbfounded stared at his friend “I don’t know what you’re talking about, and I’m certainly not jealous.”
“Give me a break man, you were practically staring at the girl.” Jay gave a smirk and Heeseung kept walking trying to resist the urge to look back and see your smile one last time “I'm fine. Let's go.” Jay shook his head and continued walking alongside Heeseung who remained silent for the rest of the way.
He wasn't jealous, was he?
☆
Civil Law was fun until you had to do a detailed essay and slides on dispossession in your bedroom on a Wednesday night. It was already past 11pm and you were still halfway through the paper. Your presentation was due next week, and you were still going over the details of the requirements for reinstatement of possession.
Being a perfectionist was a characteristic of yours that hindered you more than it helped you most of the time. You wanted your work to be perfect and meticulous to the point of not leaving any room for questions. The problem was that this cost you precious nights that you could have been having fun and enjoying life like a young university student.
You were stretching your arms when you were surprised by the sound of your phone ringing on the table. Your heart skipped a beat when you saw Heeseung's name on the screen. What was he doing? He had never called you before.
'Is this an emergency?' You instantly thought and worriedly answered the phone.
“Hello? Heeseung?” The hesitation in your voice was clear “Hm—” Heeseung’s deep voice and breathing suddenly startled you “Yeah, it’s me. Sorry for calling you so late.”
“It’s okay. Did something happen?” Your heart was suddenly racing, and you couldn’t explain why. His laughter on the other end warmed your ear “No silly, I wanted to talk about our project.” The way his voice sounded deeper over the phone made you swallow hard and cross your legs instinctively.
This was pathetic. How could you feel nervous about a phone conversation? And worst of all — with Heeseung?
“Oh, right.” You gave an awkward chuckle “What is it?” It was like you could feel his smile through his breathing on the phone call.
“I was just thinking… maybe it would be interesting to talk about criminal liability for crimes committed during the Second World War with the creation of the Nuremberg Tribunal.” Heeseung said in a calm and soft voice. As if he was flirting, but you knew that couldn’t be possible. He had no reason to flirt with you “Ah, you mean the International Military Tribunal?”
“Exactly.” Was his voice always this sexy? “I think it would be a good topic, and I know you like the criminal side of things, so it could be interesting for us to address this.” Your stomach turned as you realized that Heeseung had paid attention to what you had said weeks ago and thought of this idea based on your personal taste.
“I think that’s a great idea!” You gave him an excited smile as if he could see it “I think it would be wonderful to include this part.”
“Yeah.” He laughed in a way that made you feel like a little girl interacting with her crush “I’m glad you liked it, we can work on that at our next meeting.”
God, you were hating yourself mentally. How could you let yourself be affected and have impure thoughts while Heeseung was talking about the Nuremberg Tribunal?
“Sure!” Was all you could manage to say before he interrupted you “Speaking of which, are you free in the afternoon on Friday? We can start right away.”
“Wait, I’ll check my schedule.” He laughed at your answer and said playfully “Of course you have a schedule.” You usually can’t stand it when Heeseung answers you sarcastically, but this time it was different. It was like he was teasing you, but not with the intention of irritating you, but just joking with you. “I’m an organized person, of course I’ll schedule my appointments in advance.”
“Alright, Miss Organized. Are you free?” You could hardly believe that you were having a friendly conversation with Heeseung over the phone “Yes, we can schedule it at our usual time.”
“Great, it's a date then.” The way he said it was normal, you know that, but the butterflies that invaded your stomach made you feel like a loser. He wasn't asking you out on a date, it was just the work meeting you always had, but you couldn't stay calm like before.
“Uh– Heeseung can I ask you something?” You gathered the courage to continue the conversation “Sure. What is it?” He seemed curious and you bit your lower lip trying to get the courage to ask what was eating you up inside “Why did you call me? You could have texted me…”
Your anxiety reached its peak when he was silent for about 5 seconds and all you could hear was his breathing “I guess I just wanted to talk to you directly about the subject.” He broke the silence and you let out an ironic chuckle “Woah?! I never thought I would hear those words from Lee Heeseung.” Unbeknownst to you on the other end of the line Heeseung had slightly pink cheeks while he had his hand over his eyes “Seriously, this topic is quite detailed so I wanted to get my point across as easily as possible, and over text it would be a hassle.”
“And why didn’t you Facetimed me?” You argued as you jumped onto your fluffy bed “I can’t.” He replied seriously and you hugged your pillow “Why not?”
Heeseung stopped for a second and laughed through his nose, which you could hear through the phone “Because I’m already in bed and I’m shirtless.” You froze, feeling your cheeks heat up at what he said and blamed yourself for imagining him shirtless calling you in the middle of the night “So… it would be a little complicated for me to have to get up, put on a shirt and turn on the lights just to say that.”
“I see… that makes sense.” You swallowed, feeling like an idiot for not knowing how to react with this bombastic information. Shirtless Lee Heeseung calling you at night is something you never expected to happen to you.
'I hope he doesn't think I'm weird.'
“And you? What are you doing up so late?” He asked and you laughed seeing how you needed to turn off your laptop and organize your materials “I was doing my civil law essay.”
“Yeah, this essay is really tiring. It took me a long time to research my topic, but you’ll finish it soon.” He said with that usual confidence with absolute certainty that you would kill the subject “Well, unfortunately I had the misfortune of getting the subject of dispossession, so it's more complicated than it seems.”
“Damn, dispossession is full of details.” He sighed, feeling his eyes grow heavy “My topic is about inheritance law. Heirs and shit like that.” You laughed, noticing how his voice was getting slightly choked with sleep “Are you sleepy?”
“Hmhum.” He nodded even though he knew you wouldn’t see it “I’m tired, I had a lot of work today.” Your legs were swinging in the air as you listened to Heeseung “Well then, I guess it’s time for you to sleep.”
He laughed and agreed “Yeah, you're right. Good night, Y/N.” His sleepy voice tickled your ear and you smirked “Good night, Heeseung.”
With one click he hung up the call and you buried your face in the pillow, giving a liberating scream after the unexpected call.
'Damn it, Lee Heeseung, what did you do to me?'
☆
Despite your good mood, this civil law essay was taking up a lot of your free time and it was tiring you out. You had been reviewing your paper and making slides for your presentation for 3 hours straight.
The civil law professor was known to be strict and detail-oriented, so you wanted everything to be perfect. As you were finishing your slides to clear your mind, your phone vibrated and you felt your body freeze when you saw that Heeseung had sent you a message.
[Lee Heeseung] — Hey
[Lee Heeseung] — Are you busy?
16:47 pm
Your heart jumped into your throat and with slightly trembling hands you picked up your phone and quickly thought about what to say.
[You] — Kinda.
[You] — Finishing the slides for my Civil Law presentation.
16:48 pm
While you were trying to calm down, Heeseung was already answering you at the speed of light.
[Lee Heeseung] — Oh.
[Lee Heeseung] — Want some help?
16:48 pm
The smile that appeared on your face was automatic. How could such a simple message affect you so much?
[You] — Really?
[You] — I mean, it would be nice if it doesn't bother you though
16:49 pm
[Lee Heeseung] — Yeah, it doesn't bother me.
[Lee Heeseung] — Where are you now?
16:49 pm
You took a deep breath, feeling your stomach churn at the excited feelings that were rising from the tone of his messages.
[You] — I'm at the library rn
16:49 pm
[Lee Heeseung] — Alright
[Lee Heeseung] — I'll be there in a few
16:50 pm
[You] — Okay
16:50 pm
Your hands went straight to the front camera of your phone to see how you looked. You started to despair because you hadn't done a more elaborate makeup that afternoon, but you didn't expect to see Heeseung.
Luckily, you had some blush and a reddish gloss in your bag. You touched up your makeup and checked your teeth for any signs of something between them but smiled in relief when you saw that they were perfect.
You adjusted your posture, your blouse, and ran your hand through the strands of your hair to comb them carefully. After feeling that you were minimally tidy, you tried to focus on your slides before Heeseung arrived.
Within 10 minutes Heeseung was already walking past the library door looking for you. When he found you, your eyes met in a second and he smiled. Your anxiety increased considerably as you watched Heeseung walk towards you. With each step he took, you were afraid that your face would show how anxious you were.
It was insane how Lee Heeseung could look so hot wearing a simple black shirt and dark jeans.
“Hey.” He pulled out the chair next to you and sat down while keeping his gaze on yours “It's been a while.”
“Yeah…” You let out the air you were holding “I've been busy with this essay and presentation.”
“I see.” he smiled and leaned forward "What do you need? I'm here to help you."
You hated yourself for not being able to look at Heeseung for so long, so you looked away to your laptop screen.
“I just need to review a few points.” You showed the summary of what you were going to present and the main points “Everything is ready, so I’m editing the slides now because I feel like I need to improve the design of them.”
Heeseung had spent so long without hearing your voice that he was almost grateful to hear you talk so much, even if it was about a stupid presentation.
“If you want, I can show you what I do on my slides.” He moved his chair closer to yours and looked at you. “Okay.” You nodded and made him comfortable so he could do whatever he wanted.
Heeseung placed his left arm behind your chair and brought his face closer to yours coincidentally as he pulled his laptop closer to him.
You felt your heart race when you smelled Heeseung's perfume. That mixed scent of chamomile shampoo married perfectly with his woody scent. It was a soft, punctual and addictive blend. A perfect masculine scent that caught your attention.
“Do you still use PowerPoint?” He mockingly smiled and you raised an eyebrow at him “What’s wrong with it?”
“Nothing, but I personally think it’s hard to work with.” he opened a website in his browser “Try this site, it has easy designs for quick slides.”
“Okay.” You were trying to focus on what he was saying, but his face was distracting you.
His forehead was more exposed than before. His hair was parted in the middle so you could see how perfectly defined his eyebrows were.
How had you not noticed before how handsome he was?
“Look… you can put these dots in a different font so that they are more readable and don’t clutter the view of the slide.” he leaned in closer and spoke close to your ear, making you swallow hard “See?”
“Yes.” You replied, trying to ignore how much Heeseung’s velvety voice tickled your ear.
“Your slides are excellent, they just need some polishing.” Heeseung’s voice was gentle and he seemed focused on the task at hand. A warm feeling filled your heart at the brief compliment he gave you.
“I just want to get this over with.” You sighed “I’m tired and I want to sleep.” Heeseung chuckled and looked at you “You’ll be fine.” Your gaze met his and his eyes gently fixed on your mouth.
Crazy thoughts ran through his mind as he roamed his gaze over your mouth and eyes.
“Thank you for helping me.” You whispered and Heeseung smirked “Of course. I'm your partner after all.”
He looked away from your laptop screen, trying to control himself. You both were in a public space, but he was there to help you, so he would control himself for now.
“What else do you need?” He asked looking at the rest of his slides “I'm all yours today.”
You bit your lips trying not to smile too much at the way he said it.
“We can move forward with our project after I finish my slides.” You suggested and he glanced at you with an amused face “If you have time, of course.”
“Sure.” he smiled and scratched the back of his neck “I have all the time in the world.”
You smiled and decided that it would be perfect to work in something with Heeseung on that peaceful afternoon.
And suddenly you realized that Heeseung's presence had become comfortable to you.
☆
The day was cloudy, with an atmosphere that made you feel lazy and do not want to study at all. However, contrary to the statistics, you were dressed up with your hair brushed, a light pink button-up blouse, a gray ruffled skirt and lots of perfume.
You knew you were dressing up more than usual for a simple work date with Heeseung, but you couldn't help it.
It was as if your body moved on its own when it came to seeing Heeseung.
Without you realizing it, your personal opinion of him gradually changed. Lee Heeseung was extremely complex. At first, he seemed like a jerk who did everything he could to irritate you, but suddenly he showed a different side with his actions. He could actually be an interesting and nice guy when he talked to you like a normal human being and didn't argue for no reason.
He was smart too. Not that you didn't know that before, but the way he was punctual, organized and focused on what he wanted was your type. You couldn't stand people who didn't keep their commitments, and surprisingly Heeseung never missed a meeting you made — to the point of him going to one of your meetings even when he was sick.
It was impossible to ignore the signs that yes, Lee Heeseung could be a nice guy, but that you couldn't see it because you couldn't stand each other for some inexplicable reason.
However, you knew it wasn’t totally your fault for your previously bad relationship. You started to feel a bit resentful ever since he started picking on you. Your theory was that maybe he felt threatened by your academic performance, or maybe there was something more to it. After all, he was now keen to work well with you and didn't care if you also got top marks.
Maybe you misjudged him, or you spent too much time not liking each other for such superficial reasons that you didn't give yourself a chance to get to know each other better.
In any case, you had already come to the conclusion that despite your differences, you had finally managed to understand each other — to the point where you began to feel an undeniable and overwhelming attraction to him.
As you looked at your reflection in the mirror you felt slightly embarrassed. Deep down, it was embarrassing to admit that you were feeling so shaken by Heeseung, the guy you swore you couldn't stand, but so many things had happened that you couldn't deny your forbidden feelings.
And you had already decided that this would stay in your mind and that was fine. It was okay to feel a slight attraction to a man, even if that man was Lee Heeseung.
The difficult part was not showing what you felt when he seemed to be staring at you so deeply whenever you were together. Or when he smiled in a way that made your legs feel weak.
You grabbed your things and left the apartment, trying to distract your mind from those deep thoughts. Today would be a good day, especially since your work was progressing nicely and it was one less thing to worry about.
On your way to the library you decided to buy some juice from a vending machine and came across Heeseung in front of the machine. Suddenly you felt a strange chill in your stomach and tried to give a soft smile to him — one that didn't look forced.
Heeseung turned around and saw you approaching. He looked up and down before giving a smirk that warmed your body. “Hey, came to buy a drink too?” Heeseung kept looking at you intently as he grabbed his soda.
“Yeah, I think we had the same idea.” You awkwardly laughed as he pulled away slightly, grabbing a juice as well “You can't kick your soda addiction, huh?”
“You know caffeine is a must before studying.” He laughingly replied as he opened the can and handed you the orange juice you liked the most “For you.”
Automatically your eyes opened in surprise and you felt your heart warm at Heeseung's sudden action. “What?! Are you serious?”
“Yeah. I can buy some juice for my project partner.” You took the juice feeling your cheeks warm by his action “Thank you…” you replied giving a small smile that didn’t go unnoticed by Heeseung.
“So, are you done with your civil law essay?” he asked, leading the way to the library. His company was no longer strange, and you had to admit that you were really enjoying talking and spending time with him.
“Yeah, but I struggled to finish it all. I was tired of reading about property invasion.” Heeseung laughed and took a sip of his soda “I know how it is. I’ve read so many cases about wills that I don’t want to hear about it any time soon.”
As Heeseung told you about an interesting story he had seen on social media, you analyzed his profile. The way he smiled without realizing it when he told you something he was interested in made you lose focus on the subject.
The way his lips moved was as if they were inviting you. They looked silky, soft and shiny. You barely realized you were staring when he turned slightly to look at you and smiled, waiting for you to answer what he asked. “Sorry, what did you say?” he sighed and smiled ironically “You weren’t listening to me, were you?” You felt your face burn with embarrassment “Sorry, I got distracted for a moment.”
“Damn, what’s so important that made you distracted like that?” He teased you and you gave him an awkward smile.
'Your lips'
“Nothing much, just worried about some things.” Heeseung narrowed his eyes, analyzing you. He knew it was nothing like that, but he wasn’t going to pressure you to talk.
“Okay…” He took one last sip of his soda before throwing it in the trash. From afar, the library door was wide open, revealing that on that afternoon, the flow of students was way bigger than on other days.
When you finally entered the library and found the place completely packed, you felt defeated. There were practically no free tables for you to work at.
“What the hell? Why is the library so crowded?” You whispered and Heeseung scratched the back of his neck “I have no idea, maybe it’s because of upcoming exams?”
You tried to think about something, but nothing came to mind. “Well, I think it’s going to be impossible for us to do our work here.” You said seeing how there was no free space and Heeseung sighed trying to think of a solution.
“What are we going to do now?” You asked, turning to Heeseung, waiting for some suggestion.
Suddenly an idea popped into Heeseung's mind, but it was a dangerous idea and he didn't know if you would accept it.
You bit your lower lip, feeling anxiety hit you with the thoughts that were coming into your mind as you saw how deeply he seemed to be thinking. “I have an idea.” You noticed his cautious tone, as if he wasn’t sure what he was going to say.
“What is it?” He turned to face you fully and you noticed how tall he was. Your insides were churning as he tightened his grip on the strap of his black backpack. There were plenty of places near college that you could go to study, but it might be more difficult and complicated.
“We can go to a nearby cafe, or somewhere else that’s quiet, like my room.” You felt the air catch in your throat and he pursed his lips without taking his eyes off your figure “You can choose whatever’s most comfortable for you.”
You bit your lower lip quickly thinking about his suggestion “But we can go somewhere else if you want.” He reinforced the other option, feeling embarrassed by the sudden suggestion he made.
“No, it’s fine.” You replied almost instantly as you ran your hand through your hair “If your room is quiet and has enough space, then it’s fine.”
“Are you sure?” He didn’t want to pressure you into doing anything you didn’t want to do, so he decided to ask again to confirm “Yeah… the most important thing right now is going to a quiet place to work.”
“Alright, I’ll show you the way.”
You and Heeseung always spent time together, so being alone in his room wouldn't be a big deal.
That's what you were trying to convince yourselves.
☆
There is nothing as unexpected as feelings. This is a fact that Heeseung knows. He understands that human beings are endowed with emotions, thoughts and decisions. Yes, human beings are complex by nature and it is possible for them to evolve and change their thoughts and beliefs over time.
But even knowing all this, he couldn't understand why you were messing with him so much.
He had already rationally decided that he would not get too involved with you. You would do this project and each of you would go on with your lives as normal. However, lately Heeseung realized that his rationality wasn't connected to the things he felt whenever he saw you.
Suddenly he started to feel strange butterflies in his stomach when you smiled at him. The way you spoke was no longer so annoying and he started to find some of your jokes funny.
And the most worrying part was that he no longer felt stressed at the thought of working with you. A part of him was already used to your presence and not only that — he felt excited at the idea of seeing you.
You who didn't used to talk much before, now are sending articles, posts and messages about work and things related to law. Including funny and random things. Someone from outside would say that you seem like friends. Talking, laughing and being seen walking down the hallway together when you meet from time to time.
He knew he no longer felt the same anger as before, but he didn't understand what kind of relationship you had. You weren't really friends, but there was clearly an inexplicable chemistry between you, a kind of invisible tension that was created whenever your eyes met for a few seconds.
It was obvious that you had changed with him. In Heeseung's old vision, you were rude, inconvenient, and completely annoying.
Now you're nice, kind, and helpful whenever he asks you anything. But what scares Heeseung the most is the undeniable attraction he's feeling for you. He's always considered himself a man of values and respect, but his eyes can't help but wander to the curve of your neck when your hair is loosely tied back.
It was impossible not to notice your torso being hugged perfectly by your pink long-sleeved blouse, the smell of your sweet perfume and your shiny mouth; and ever since the party he couldn't stop thinking about your waist and how it felt between his fingers.
It was becoming mental torture to see your mouth almost every day and think about how soft it must be but not being able to do anything about it. It was scary how he seemed to not think straight when it came to you, but what was even scarier was that you agreed to go study in his room.
Even though he was the one who had suggested studying in his room, the fact that you accepted was surprisingly exciting. Yes, you would study as usual, but this time you would be at his desk and in his environment. It was inevitable not to feel nervous about the situation.
He tried to talk about anything random on the way and you even laughed a few times, but both of you were clearly tense. Maybe you just needed to start studying and this would pass.
Heeseung stopped at the door of his dorm, opening it slightly, feeling aware of your presence there. He entered first and took off his shoes, making room for you to pass. “Come in.”
You smiled and left your shoes at the door, feeling slightly shy as you entered his place “Thank you.”
The place was simple, tidy, and decorated differently than you’d expect. Even though he has an eccentric personality, there wasn’t much decor. Heeseung and his roommate were surprisingly minimalists, except for a few pizza boxes on the kitchen counter that Heeseung picked up to throw in the trash. “Don’t mind the mess, Jake and I had pizza yesterday and we passed out after we ate it.”
You chuckled looking at your surroundings “It’s okay, everyone has those days.”
He gave you a side smile, guiding you to the door of his room. Surprisingly, the dorm was bigger than you expected, seeing as he still managed to have a room just for himself.
“This is my room.” He walked into his room, making space for you to observe everything while he grabbed another chair so you could sit at his table.
“It’s really cool.” You felt like you were entering a forbidden and very exclusive place. You never imagined that you would get the chance to see Lee Heeseung’s room. The decor was peculiar, with a framed basketball player’s jersey on the wall and minimalist posters about sports and music.
Interestingly, he liked rock music. You noticed after seeing that he had a few music CDs together on the table, giving it a sophisticated and personal air. You smiled when you saw that there was a photo of him as a child with his parents on the nightstand next to his bed.
But surprisingly, what shocked you the most was seeing the amount of books he had in the place. Yes, Lee Heeseung really liked reading, and especially doctrines of law from the library.
Obviously, he worked hard to be one of the best on the course along with you, but seeing this reality up close was even more impressive.
His bed was tidy, but the books scattered on top of it gave the final touch to what truly meant to be in Heeseung's environment.
“You have a lot of books.” You commented when you saw Heeseung placing the other chair next to his at the table and he mischievously smiled “Of course I do. I want to be an attorney, so I need to read a lot.”
“Attorney?” You raised an eyebrow. “I think it’s cool if you want to follow that path… You’d probably enjoy talking to my dad.” You spoke softly at the last part, but Heeseung heard it anyway.
He noticed that the way you spoke insinuated that you didn't want to follow that path and curiously, as if your father was a distant figure for you.
“Don’t you want to be an attorney?” Heeseung asked you, seeing you going towards his desk and sitting down with a serious expression. “To be honest, I don't know… it’s not my dream.”
He sat down next to you and came closer, trying to make you comfortable. “Do you have an idea of what you want to do?”
“Maybe a prosecutor?” You confessed and smiled shyly. It was the first time you had talked about this dream with anyone other than Gaeul. “It’s still a distant idea, I guess I’ll become an attorney first. That’s what everyone expects of me anyway.”
“Everyone?” He asked gently. “It’s complicated.” You sighed and he realized it was still a sensitive subject that you might not want to explain, and he wasn’t going to pressure you into doing so. He also had things to deal with that he didn’t open up about easily.
“Well, regardless of what you choose, I know you’ll do well.” He commented as he placed his notebooks and laptop on the table. “You’re the only one who’s managed to beat me sometimes, and I know very well that not just anyone can defeat me easily.”
You gave Heeseung a smile, realizing he was trying to cheer you up in his own way. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
He smiled and watched you placing your materials on the table, noticing the post-it notes with legal concepts on the wall in front of the table.
“Your room is… interesting.” You commented as you analyzed all the mnemonics and tips he had written on a post-it that was almost falling on the table. “Are you trying to start a fight?” Heeseung looked at you suspiciously and you laughed.
“No, I just think this room suits you.” You grinned “It’s cute.”
“Are you calling me cute?” Heeseung smirked, bringing his face closer to yours. “I’m talking about the room.” You replied, swallowing hard, opening your laptop.
“Well, that's a pity then.” You felt your cheeks burn and your body fizz at the suggestive tone of his comment.
Maybe you were seeing things, but it looked a lot like Lee Heeseung was flirting with you right now.
“So, before we start,” He continued to look at you while you tried to pretend that you weren’t feeling weak with his presence so close “I’m going to the kitchen to drink some water. Do you want something to drink?” He asked and you shook your head “No, I’ll drink the juice you gave me later.”
He gave a little smile of pride seeing that you actually accepted the juice he bought for you.
“Alright then, I’ll be right back.” Heeseung nodded and stood up as you tried to calm down.
'It's okay, he was just teasing me. I just need to calm down and focus on my studies.' You thought as you tried to convince yourself that the tension in the air was just some kind of illusion and not the harsh reality.
☆
Heeseung was in the kitchen getting a glass of water trying to understand the situation he was in. You were there, in his room, with your beauty shining like the morning breeze.
It felt like a dream. At first he didn't even know how to explain why he suggested it, but his intrusive thoughts were faster, shockingly you had accepted. In a way, you were there to study like you always do in the library, but this time he was feeling strange.
He wanted something to happen and this wasn’t good.
Because it meant that Heeseung had finally accepted his feelings of attraction towards you and was considering doing something about it.
He took a deep breath and decided to control himself for the sake of your project. However, as much as he tried to focus on his studies, the moment he walked past his bedroom door and saw you sitting cross-legged, your hair loose showing your neck, and the way you were biting the tip of your pen while focused on your laptop screen, all his common sense went straight out the window.
“So, can we start?” Heeseung asked, swallowing hard and scratching the back of his neck, feeling nervous. “Sure, where do you want to start?” You asked, looking at him with the sexiest eyes he swore he had ever seen in his life. “We can read the article you suggested.”
“Alright.” He smiled seeing how excited you seemed about the project. “By the way, I saw your CDs and posters.” You changed the subject as he opened the file on his computer “You’re quite… eclectic.” He chuckled and turned to you “Why? Did you think I only listened to one type of music?”
You shook your head and gave him a side smile. “I thought you were more into the classics.”
“I like a little bit of everything, you know? I can appreciate different types of art.” He noticed the way your skirt seemed to have ridden up the moment you adjusted yourself in your chair.
“I’m surprised.” He looked away, trying to control his thoughts. But it was hard when you looked like a goddess next to him. “Every day I discover something new about you.”
“Well, I told you that there are a lot of things about me that you don’t know.” He replied as he locked gazes with you. Heeseung definitely had a unique charm.
“Fair enough.” You replied and he gave you that smile that made your legs lose strength. “I think I made too many assumptions about you.” You confessed, leaning against the table and he brought his face closer to yours “Yeah? Maybe you should get to know me better then.”
You felt your body catch fire at the way he whispered an octave lower than normal and smirked “Yeah, maybe I should.”
Heeseung felt his face and ears heat up at the way you were looking at him.
He knew something had changed between you and the tension was so intense you could cut it with a knife.
His eyes dropped to your exposed neck. Your sweet scent was intoxicating the air and the necklace you were wearing was shinier than usual. It adorned your collarbone magnificently.
Did you have to look this good for a measly study date?
He didn't know if he could cross that invisible line between you, so he slowly approached you, lowering his gaze to your mouth. Since he was sitting on your left side, his right hand went up to your face and tucked a single strand of your hair behind your ear.
You felt a shiver run through your body as his fingertips lightly touched your ear.
His face moved closer to yours agonizingly slowly, and you felt his sweet minty breath fan your face.
Heeseung instinctively wet his lower lip with his tongue and you felt your breath catch as he lowered his right hand to the corner of your neck, touching you gently.
Your eyes locked into Heeseung's intense, dark eyes, and you felt your body fizz at the way he was staring at you. It was intense, serious, deep, as if he wanted to convey a message that only you would understand. You didn't need to say anything. The way you looked at each other was the answer to the unspoken question that floated implicitly in the air.
The desire you both feel is mutual.
He moved closer and pulled your neck towards him, pressing the spot with his long fingers. You closed your eyes when you felt his mouth brush against yours as if he was testing your reactions.
Heeseung kissed you, gently pressing his lips against yours, sending a dose of pleasure through your body. He gave you a long peck and quickly pulled away to make sure that this was really happening.
He was kissing you. This is real.
He smiled over your lips and kissed you again, with more intensity, making you pull him by the collar. Heeseung's left hand landed on your left thigh, squeezing the skin there and you felt your stomach churn.
Heeseung bit your lower lip and you moaned, making him feel a wave of pride invade his body. Your arms wrapped around his neck, while your hands went straight to his soft hair.
All you wanted to feel was the soft strands of his gorgeous hair between your fingers and you finally knew what that felt like. Heeseung groaned into your mouth as you pulled his hair and scratched the back of his neck with your nails.
Heeseung felt like he had ascended to heaven as he felt your soft lips moving over his. You were like water on a dry day that he couldn't get enough of.
Not even his deepest thoughts could recreate the exultant feeling he felt when he finally kissed you. He was thirsty and wanted more. As much as he tried to hold it in, his deep desire was stronger and he happily gave in to its sweet taste.
You separated for a brief second to catch your breath and he licked your lower lip making you open your mouth slightly sighing as he deepened the kiss with his tongue.
The kiss that started soft was now intense, passionate and more desperate. You ran your hands down Heeseung's neck until they stopped on his chest. Heeseung intertwined his right hand in your hair while his left rested on your lower back.
Heeseung kissed you intensely, as if he couldn't stop. You lost track of time as you let yourself be numbed by the feeling of Heeseung's tongue exploring your mouth.
He sucked on your bottom lip before attacking your neck with longing open-mouthed kisses. “You're so beautiful.” He whispered against the skin of your neck as he brushed it with his lips making you press your thighs together and sigh in pleasure “So fucking beautiful.”
You held onto Heeseung’s hair and his left shoulder as he got closer “Heeseung.” You whispered but were interrupted by his mouth kissing the column of your neck with desire.
“You drive me crazy.” He whispered in your ear making you roll your eyes back and moan embarrassingly. Heeseung felt his pants tighten at the reactions and sounds you made.
His left hand went to the buttons of your pink blouse with slight desperation. He was panting and you were spaced out with so many things happening at the same time.
You knew you wanted Heeseung, but you didn't know it would be this intense.
“Fuck” He trailed kisses from your throat to your collarbone, allowing the scent of your perfume to sweetly intoxicate his senses “It’s hard to contain myself when you’re like this.” He whispered over your mouth, kissing you again.
You couldn't form a coherent sentence. Your heart was racing, your breathing was short, and even though you were sitting down, you felt all the strength in your legs evaporate.
His hands went to your thighs, smoothing them up under your skirt. You reached out to take off the denim jacket he was wearing and he smirked over your mouth.
"So eager, huh?” he teased you and you sighed, frowning “Look who's talking.” You whispered wryly trying not to be embarrassed at how breathless and needy you sounded.
“Thought you liked it when I teased you, babe.” Heeseung’s sensual tone as he took off his coat made you lose the last of your breath. His shoulders looked even bigger up close.
“Just shut up and kiss me.” You whispered and pulled Heeseung by the collar of his shirt, making him give you several kisses and smile on your lips “So bossy…”
The way Heeseung's mouth seemed to fit perfectly into yours was impressive.
Heeseung's hands went under your shirt, squeezing the bare skin of your waist, giving you goosebumps and making you moan into Heeseung's mouth.
He was relentless. Heeseung's mouth devoured you with fervor and desperation, leaving you breathless. You held onto the hem of Heeseung's shirt as he pulled away slightly, turning his head for a moment.
“What’s wrong?” You asked, feeling your entire body tremble.
“Wait.” Heeseung reluctantly moved away a little more, hearing noises from outside “Do you hear that?” He turned to the door and you breathlessly tried to focus on what he was saying.
Until you noticed – the sound of keys moving near the principal door latch. You adjusted your skirt down and buttoned the first few buttons of your blouse that Heeseung had unbuttoned.
Suddenly you were paralyzed and stared at each other when you heard the key opening the main door in the room.
“Man, I'm dead, I want to sleep the rest of the afternoon.” Jake spoke loudly and you and Heeseung quickly separated from each other as he tried to fix his hair and appear as natural as possible.
You adjusted your seats as if you were studying your computer screen intently.
“Heeseung, are you there?” Jake knocked on his friend’s bedroom door and opened it at once “I need to tell you what happened to me at the coffee shop—” Jake’s eyes widened and he froze when he saw that you were in Heeseung’s room.
Heeseung glared at him with a menacing look. That look that implicitly said 'get the hell out of here'.
“I’m kind of busy right now, Jake.” He said through gritted teeth and his friend gave an awkward smile and scratched his head “Oh sorry to disturb you guys. I didn’t know you were studying … but it’s good to see you y/n.” He greeted you and you nodded politely “Hi.” Your voice came out soft and thin with fright.
“Well then, we’ll talk later.” Jake said to Heeseung with a teasing look making Heeseung want to kill him at that moment.
He closed the door to Heeseung's room and you were left in absolute, awkward silence.
Your heart was racing and your breath was still coming in short gasps. What the hell had happened?
“Sorry, I forgot Jake could come back earlier today.” Heeseung sighed as he ran his hand over his face, trying not to feel embarrassed by the awkward situation you both found yourselves in.
“It’s okay.” You gave a small laugh through your nose “We can try studying now… if you want.” Heeseung looked at you and mischievously smiled “Honestly, I don’t know if I’m in the mood to study right now.” He confessed looking into your eyes, hitting you like an electrifying lightning bolt.
You nodded and smiled, feeling your insides stir at Heeseung’s gentle tone “Yeah, me too.”
So, in silent agreement, you decided to organize the table and put away the materials. Even though the tension was still there, Jake cut the mood, so all that was left was the weird tension and the end of this unsuccessful study session.
After you packed your things, Heeseung walked you to the door and looked at you apologetically “Are you sure you don’t want me to walk you back?”
“No, it’s okay.” You smiled and felt embarrassed remembering what happened moments before trying to calm your heart.
“Okay.” He leaned against the side of the door, crossing his arms and smiling at you “We’ll schedule the next meeting later.” He whispered as he tried to contain a smile with his teeth biting his own lip.
You nodded and slowly turned around “Bye, Heeseung.” He gave you that shy smile that only he knew how to do “Bye, y/n.”
After he closed the door and you walked out into the hallway, all you could think about was what had happened that afternoon.
You kissed. No, you had made out intensely and passionately, but the scariest thing is to think of what would have happened if Jake hadn't interrupted you.
And the worst part is that you wanted more.

Heeseung was still awake, staring at his ceiling as he remembered what had happened that afternoon.
After you left, Jake tried to talk to Heeseung but he went off to clear his head — which clearly didn't work out very well. Even though he tried to occupy himself and do other things he was still numb to the feeling of your mouth on his.
Heeseung couldn't sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, you appeared in his mind. He couldn't forget the feel of your soft skin under his fingers, your bright, pleading eyes, and how soft your mouth was.
He ran his hand over his face trying to control himself, but he couldn't help but feel hot when he remembered your kiss. He had taken the risk of kissing you, but he didn't expect your response to be as intense as his.
Heeseung couldn't pinpoint when everything changed, because 3 months ago he couldn't stand you, but now he couldn't wait to see you.
He picked up his phone and saw that it was almost 1 am and he couldn't get you out of his head. Your scent was tattooed on his mind and he knew he wanted to smell it again.
Heeseung wanted to see you, touch you, kiss you again.
But a doubt hovered over his mind: what about you? What did you want? Do you regret it? Or did you also like it and want more?
Heeseung knew there was no way to guess that now, but he would do whatever it took to find out.
☆
It's been 3 days since you and Heeseung were in complete silence.
After what had happened in his room, you were still in shock. But the fact that you and he didn't talk anymore was worrying and it irritated you.
You guys made out in his room and he couldn't send you at least a good morning text? Or anything else? How would you communicate and behave when you had to meet for your project after this?
Deep down, you didn’t know whether you regretted it or not. You don’t want to mess up your – finally – good relationship, but at the same time, you want to kiss him again. You don't know how this will impact the two of you, but you know you don't want to get ghosted by Heeseung or get weird by it.
Like a mature adult, you tried to occupy your mind with your civil law presentation, but the worst part was that nothing could get the vision of Heeseung out of your head. The words he whispered and how he kissed you like he’s been longing for it for a long time… it was too much.
The day of the presentation had already arrived, and even though you were confident in your knowledge, you were afraid to see Heeseung again.
You don't know how to behave or what to say when you see him. You could barely translate the things you were feeling at that moment when he intensively kissed you. In the end, all you knew was that even though you were irritated, you could barely see him without feeling your stomach twist and your body heat up.
On the other hand, for the first time in his life, Heeseung was excited to see your performance.
You were already at the front of the class with your slides turned on and waiting for the professor to give the go-ahead for you to start presenting.
Heeseung was sitting a little further forward so he wouldn't miss any details. His gaze met your and he gave a smile that made your insides melt.
It was different to feel that this time Heeseung's presence made you more nervous than usual.
When you started your presentation, everyone stopped and hung on every word.
Mainly Heeseung.
It was curious how you didn't look nervous while you clicked on the slides to explain your topic. Your confidence exudes how much you had prepared for the presentation, making him admire you even more. He eyed you attentively, not wanting to miss any of your moves. Your hands weren't shaking, and the way you presented yourself was so delicate and so fierce at the same time. He smirked watching how you pointed to the topics on the slide.
You really used his idea for your slides.
'Such pretty hands.' He thought about how it would feel them touching his face, his skin, him. The horde of forbidden thoughts filling his mind.
He swore he was really paying attention to what you were saying, but he got distracted so easily that even he couldn't explain why.
Suddenly he realized that he was thinking about things that definitely had nothing to do with possessory dispossession but had to do with what it must be like to see you on top of him while his hands roamed over your body.
His thoughts were interrupted when you finished your presentation perfectly making the sound of claps fill the room.
Once again you had outdone yourself in a presentation, but this time Heeseung wasn't analyzing the way you explained or trying to see if you would make mistakes in your diction. Now he could only think about how admirable your effort was.
Especially how he wanted you so bad.
However, when class ended, you had disappeared without giving him a chance to talk to you, leaving Heeseung even more anxious. What did he have to do to finally be able to talk to you again?

The ballroom was adorned with bright lights and chandeliers with sparkling stones that could blind you if you stare at them for too long. The buffet tables were extravagant (as always) and contained every type of food you could imagine. Seafood, pasta, and a variety of drinks. The exaggerated extravagance mixed with the forced, discreet laughter was a known sound that made your ears itch.
People were dressed in all the elegance that the event required, and everyone seemed polite and well-behaved. However, even from a distance you could capture several fake smiles, carefully placed on the faces of poor university students who were trying to survive in this environment by flattering more well-known and experienced attorneys in search of a possible internship or job at a renowned firm.
The P&J Foundation event was one of the only ones open to university students and law school graduates looking to meet future work partners or new opportunities in the job market.
And of course you would be there, “enjoying” the extravagant decorations, the lectures and the valuable advice from several experienced professionals — that’s the main reason why people go there anyway. But one of the biggest reasons was that your father was one of the sponsors, so missing out was not an option.
Even though it was a beneficial event for several college students, you felt slightly uncomfortable due to the judging looks people gave you when they saw you standing there drinking whatever was on the table without talking to anyone.
You were silent, observing the environment. Since you arrived, you had only greeted a few attorneys who approached to ask about your father, and not about you. It was as if you weren't even an option, but just the daughter of the great attorney Park.
In a way, it was comforting to know that the event wouldn't last long and maybe someone you knew would show up to relieve your boredom.
Someone like Heeseung.
“You look lonely.” Heeseung’s unmistakable voice behind you stole your attention, making you turn around at once “Maybe you need some company?”
Your breath caught in your throat and your eyes widened at the sight of Heeseung in a black suit and parted hair in front of you.
Your eyes shamelessly roamed over Heeseung's entire body seeing how the suit was intricately molded to his torso and waist. The black dress shirt he was wearing underneath was plain and was slightly open to reveal a bit of Heeseung's collarbone and his thin silver necklace.
“Oh, it’s you.” You swallowed hard and kept your face straight, nonchalant at seeing him. After 3 days of not talking to you, this is how he shows up?
He had his hands in his pants pockets and approached you with that smirk that drove you crazy “You look beautiful.” He took your hand and gave it a soft kiss on your knuckles while piercing through you with his intense eyes.
You felt butterflies in the pit of your stomach and a shiver ran down your spine seeing Heeseung's delicacy. Even if you wanted to be angry at him, it would be difficult to remain that way when he acted like this, it’s like he knew exactly what to do to disarm you.
“Thank you.” Heeseung’s eyes couldn’t move away from your figure, making your neck heat up.
“Your suit looks good.” You spoke sincerely and Heeseung chuckled “Just my suit?” He whispered, bringing his face closer to yours and firmly held your waist making you look away.
“What do you want, Heeseung?” Your cheeks were burning and your lips puckered in a cute pout that Heeseung found adorable even if you were speaking in a harsh way.
“Can we talk?” You felt weak at his gentle tone combined with the way he sweetly stared at you “Talk about what?” He chuckled through his nose and tilted his head so he could whisper in your ear “Stop pretending like you don't know.” The way his warm breath tickled your ear made you dizzy.
“Fine.” You sighed and crossed your arms trying to maintain your posture “Let's go somewhere.” You weren't going to talk about this in front of everyone, so you decided to lead the way to some secluded place where you would have the privacy you needed while you struggled to organize your thoughts. What was he going to talk to you about? The kiss? What did it really mean?
Your anxiety was already at its peak, but you felt a sense of deja vu when he placed his hand behind your back as you walked down the hall.
“So, are you enjoying the event?” He asked in a whisper and you snickered “’Enjoying’ is a strong word...” Your sigh made Heeseung raise an eyebrow “It’s boring.”
“I thought these parties were your thing.” He confessed and you mockingly glanced at him “I’m just used to them, but they’re usually a drag.”
“Yeah, it must be hard growing up going to rich people’s parties and eating the best of the best.” He said ironically and you pushed him lightly, giving him a sour smile “It’s not that fun when you have to flatter others so they don’t talk bad about you or your father.”
Your confession made him stare at you for a moment and go silent. Heeseung knew that you were a layered person and that in the past he had a lot of bad impressions of you, so maybe he needed to admit that he was wrong and try to see things from your point of view.
Suddenly you left the main hall and managed to find an empty room in an isolated corridor away from everyone. You entered and realized that it was a small storage room full of folders on dark grey shelves, a table and a locked cabinet.
After you both entered the room, Heeseung locked the door behind him, and you stood in front of the table with your arms crossed, impatiently staring at him. Unfortunately for your heart, it seemed like his addictive scent was even more evident in this closed room.
“So?” Your tone was impatient “What do you want?” He slowly smirked and approached you cautiously.
“You seem angry.” he stood in front of you making you scoff and put your hands on your hips “You didn't answer my question, Heeseung.”
Heeseung took a deep breath and looked away for a moment. He spent the whole afternoon mentally rehearsing what he was going to say, but now that he was in front of you it was different. Your red dress was making him lose his mind.
He needed to be honest, and he wouldn't run away anymore.
“I'm sorry.” your face softened at the sincerity in his voice “I’m sorry for disappearing, I know I should have said something.” Heeseung looked at you tenderly and touched your cheek “But ever since we kissed, I got crazy, like I genuinely couldn’t sleep, study or do anything without you showing on my mind” he breathed out “So… I needed to understand what I was feeling.”
You swallowed hard as you waited for him to finish.
“The truth is that I can’t stop thinking about you.” he whispered, moving closer to you “I know that since we met, we haven’t gotten along, and maybe I’m at fault at this because I’ve been an idiot to you several times, but there’s just… something about you…” he slid his fingertips under your jaw “You drive me crazy.”
Your heartbeat was already going crazy, while your breath was caught in your throat. The closer he got, the more you felt your feelings stir.
“What do you mean by that?” you frowned and crossed your arms, trying not to be shaken by Heeseung’s words and scent invading your senses.
He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. “What I mean is that I’m here admitting that I want you.” he spoke directly making your legs weak.
Heeseung came closer and you felt your back touch the table behind you. His hands went straight to your waist as he pressed your body against his. Your back arched slightly and Heeseung brought his face closer to yours. “Do you really want me?” you asked shakily under the atmosphere pressure, and he smiled.
"Yes, I want you." he whispered against your mouth as he gripped the corner of your neck with the long fingers of his right hand "Isn't it obvious?"
His body radiated a unique heat that destroyed all your sanity. His dark eyes looked at you with intensity, breaking down all the defenses you swore you had put up against him.
“You’re all I have on my mind.” his smooth lips brushed against yours and your breathing became heavy “Can I kiss you?” his question was like an arrow being pierced through your heart “Yes.” you whispered, holding onto Heeseung’s forearms.
He smiled and kissed you passionately, pressing his body against yours. An electrifying current ran through your entire body when you felt his lips move intensely and passionately.
Heeseung kissed you with an insatiable desire. He couldn't get enough of your taste. He always wanted more and more. Suddenly, you groaned when you felt his tongue slide over yours and his hands grip your hips.
You couldn't deny it. Heeseung knew exactly what he was doing, and it was so hot that you pulled him by his collar wanting more.
Heeseung moved his kisses down to your jaw and you gasped when you felt him grab your body by your thighs and place you on the table behind you.
“Did you dress up for me?” he whispered as he attacked your neck with desire “No, I always dress well.” you tried to answer feeling your breath quicken. Your hands went straight to Heeseung’s hair and he smiled against your skin “Aw, it’s a shame. I thought you wanted to impress me.”
Heeseung kissed your sensitive spot below your ear and you moaned making him smile against your skin “Why? Are you impressed?” you teased Heeseung and he moved his hands up your thigh under your red dress.
“Yeah.” he placed a lingering kiss on the center of your throat making your body tremble with desire “You're looking so fucking beautiful in this dress.” he kissed you again as you pulled him towards you with your legs. This time he kissed you slowly and deeply while holding onto your loose hair.
Heeseung was on cloud nine. How much he had missed feeling your lips on his, clashing in perfect harmony. When you pulled away from his mouth to breathe and began to kiss the length of his neck, he moaned, making you close your legs around him.
“You should see me when I'm not wearing it, then.” you whispered sensually before biting Heeseung's ear making his breath shaky as he squeezed your thighs tightly “Fuck — stop teasing me, baby.” The way he called you made your stomach turn.
“Why? What are you going to do if I don't stop?” You looked into his eyes, faking innocence, and began to slowly open the buttons of his suit, teasing him with your fingertips “You don't wanna know.” he smirked holding your neck tightly “I'm going to ruin you.” he bit your lower lip making you moan and squeeze his hips with your legs pulling him closer, seeking any kind of contact.
When you finished unbuttoning his suit, you ran your hands over his black dress shirt, sliding down his chest to his stomach, noticing how surprisingly defined he was. Heeseung instinctively groaned into the kiss and pulled your hair back to attack your neck and collarbone, making you gasp.
All of your reactions were like fuel that further fueled the fire inside Heeseung. He knew he couldn't go all the way in this storage, but the way you moaned and squeezed him with your thighs was making it difficult to control himself.
“You're making it hard for me to stop.” Heeseung said in a broken sigh with his forehead pressed against yours as his hands explored you beneath your dress “I want to touch you.” You could see the longing in his glossy eyes, especially by the way his cheeks and ears were burning red.
How beautiful he looked in that state of despair. A sight that only you had the privilege of having: seeing Lee Heeseung completely surrendered to you begging to touch you.
“Okay.” You whispered and cupped your hands around his cheeks, pulling his face to yours in a kiss, making him melt inside. It was insane how his mouth fit perfectly on yours, as if it was made especially for you.
Your entire body was on fire. The butterflies danced deep in your stomach when he slowly pulled the sides of your panties down as he ravished your mouth with his desperate kiss.
Heeseung's bangs were already losing their definition from all the movement and small beads of sweat accumulating on both of your foreheads making you think that your clothes were a big impediment.
With trembling hands, you began to open the buttons of his blouse, feeling the soft skin of his neck and collarbone under your fingers making him let out low grunts that shuddered your mind and body.
He forcefully pulled your legs closer to the edge of the table, making your body arch slightly. Your breathing became uneven as he removed your panties completely, letting them fall to the floor.
In a brief moment of sanity, you couldn’t believe you were doing this with Heeseung inside a storage room. This was dangerous, insane, lewd, and unfortunately, you liked it. It’s like your brain shuts out whenever you get involved with Heeseung.
As his hands began to roam the inside of your thigh you began to feel more desperate. “Heeseung, p–please.” Your stutter made Heeseung smile as his fingers slid across your skin teasingly.
“What?” he asked as he left a trail of kisses on your cheek “Please. Touch me.” You were on edge and he wasn’t helping.
He smiled against your skin, taking small bites on your jaw as his right hand slowly rose, as if to test your patience.
“Heeseung.” You dug your fingers into his shoulder, whispering, like a plea.
But before he could give you what you wanted, your phone started ringing madly. You were startled by the sound, and he pulled away for a moment so you could find your phone in the middle of the table.
You looked at the screen and your body stiffened when you saw that it was your father calling you. Heeseung instantly noticed the change in your body language and distanced himself enough to look at your face.
“Damn it.” You tried to steady your breathing “It’s my father.”
Heeseung stood up straight and reluctantly let go of your body, trying to catch his breath. He felt irritated. Why did it seem like someone always managed to ruin the mood between you two whenever you were alone?
He soon noticed that you were hesitating, so he grabbed your panties and gently pulled them up over your legs and touched your cheek with his knuckles “You need to take this call, don't you?” he asked in a tender whisper and you nodded, feeling suddenly ashamed of the situation you found yourself in.
“I'll give you some space.” he stepped away, closing the buttons on his shirt that you undone and straightening his suit again.
As Heeseung fixed his hair, you closed your legs, feeling completely frustrated at the interruption, and jumped off the table, adjusting your dress.
With a cough to regulate your voice, you answered your phone trying to sound normal.
“Hello? Father?” Heeseung leaned against the wall and stared at you from afar as you lowered the fabric of your dress.
Your face showed an expression of defeat, feeling like this situation is more complicated than it seemed.
Suddenly Heeseung began to reflect on how easily he lost control when he was with you. It seemed like it was too easy to lose himself in you, as if there were no consequences.
“What?” You felt your heart stop at what you just heard “Are you here at the event?”
Heeseung and you looked at each other at the same time, knowing what that meant.
You would have to face your father that night.
☆
Heeseung had helped you adjust your dress before you left the storage room first. Since he didn't want to draw attention, Heeseung had the idea of you going first and then he would leave.
You were clearly upset, frustrated, and tired. Why did your father have to come to this event now? Your mind could barely think straight after what had happened in the storage room.
Your heart calmed down, but you couldn’t forget Heeseung’s confession. How sincere and desperate he sounded. Your mind constantly went back to the way he talked, touched you, acted. He was addictive.
As you mingled through the crowd looking for your father, Heeseung watched you from afar, analyzing your behavior. Apart from the fact that you were a begging mess minutes earlier, the way you tensed every time your father was mentioned made him think there was something more about you that he needed to uncover.
You randomly wandered through the main ballroom and Heeseung approached your figure again “You seem lost.” he commented and you laughed lightly hearted “I’m just looking for my father.”
“What’s he like?” Heeseung asked looking at the crowd with you “Serious? A bit scary, I guess...” you whispered the last part, and he arched his eyebrow “I’ll be right by your side then.”
The way Heeseung showed he cared for you made you smile slightly “What a gentleman…” he smiled feeling the irony of your voice “Of course, I know how to treat a woman.”
You glanced at him, seeing how he was giving that naughty smile that meant he was thinking about things that had nothing to do with chivalry.
“Sweetie, I'm glad you came.” before you could say anything, your conversation was interrupted by your father's voice.
Heeseung turned to the side and saw how unusual your posture was. You suddenly looked more rigid, serious and with a monotonous expression.
You turned to your father and gave him that weak smile that Heeseung knew wasn’t genuine. “Hello, father.” Heeseung noticed how you called your father in a distant and formal way. As if you didn’t have the freedom to call him whatever you wanted.
“I didn’t expect you to come.” As always, you communicated only what was necessary with your father. Nothing less and nothing more. “I managed to get some free time to come see you and see my event.”
Heeseung realized what that meant. He was the famous Attorney Park who sponsored events and ways for people from difficult backgrounds like himself to have a chance in the legal field.
He was a legend in his field and his intentions seemed good, so why did you seem so distant?
“And who is this fine gentleman?” He turned his gaze to Heeseung who instantly bowed and extended his hand in a polite way “I'm Lee Heeseung, sir. Pleased to meet you.” He friendly smiled and your father shook his hand while he analyzed his figure.
“He’s my friend from college.” You replied, surprised at your father’s friendly interaction with Heeseung.
Heeseung didn't miss how you had called him friend and how strange it sounded. He didn't want to be your friend, he wanted much more.
“I didn’t know you had such a polite friend.” Your father seemed to be in a good mood while you felt a little more comfortable seeing that your father had taken a liking to him.
Then suddenly you started to realize how important this had become to you. His opinion of Heeseung was important because you really cared about him.
“I feel honored, sir.” Heeseung smiled gently “So, Heeseung.” Your father's attention was solely focused on Heeseung “Tell me, what do you think of this event?” Your father asked Heeseung, who swallowed hard and gave a gentle smile, feeling his gaze fixed on him.
“I think it is a terrific opportunity, sir. I had the chance to have a fruitful conversation with a few attorneys along with a friend and we had some great legal advice.” he was sincere and you bit your lower lip trying to contain your smile at how his vocabulary suddenly went back to being completely formal compared to the way he normally speaks to you.
It was hilarious to see him chatting calmly and composed as if he hadn't been absolutely ravishing you just minutes ago in a storage room.
“That’s great.” Your father gave a satisfied smile with his answer “Me and a few other colleagues sponsored this kind of event because life wasn’t easy for us, so we want to help the next generation in the best way possible.” Heeseung looked away to see Jake seemed more well-behaved than usual as he chatted with two older attorneys from afar.
“It’s an amazing event, sir. We are really grateful for this unique opportunity.” Heeseung smiled sincerely as your father seemed pleased with the conversation “What do you plan to do in the future, son?” Heeseung was left speechless for a moment “I want to be an attorney, sir.” You noticed how his voice trembled a little and you noticed how this was a big deal to him. This is his dream for real.
“That’s wonderful.” Your father gave a smile that left him stunned. It had been a long time since you had seen your father smile like that. “Since I became an attorney, I’ve been able to change my family’s lives, so I would say it’s worth it.” Heeseung felt an instant sense of identification with the sentence your father said.
“That’s why I have high expectations for my daughter.” He looked at you and you gave a tense smile that Heeseung instantly noticed “She’s the best in the class so she would indeed be a sensational attorney, but if I may say this, sir, I believe that regardless of the career she decides to pursue in law, I know she will be successful, because she’s brilliant in everything she decides to do.” Heeseung spoke seriously and you looked away from him, feeling your heart melt completely with his praise.
He could have promoted himself or just kept quiet. But he decided to risk it all by praising you to that degree, even without knowing your father.
And just like lightning strikes a tree and burns it, you realized the obvious truth: you were in love with Lee Heeseung and would accept the consequences that would come with that reality.
Your father looked at the two of you making it obvious he was analyzing the situation and understanding what was happening right there. The way Heeseung firmly said that, and you got shy made it obvious that you two were more than friends.
“It’s true.” Your father’s answer surprised you “If I’m being honest, I wish she could be an attorney like me, without the sufferings I had to go through, but I know her path can change, so I want her to be successful in any field.” You felt your body stiff. It was the first time your father had said something like that about you.
He didn't open up about his feelings very much, so you always thought that being an attorney in his office was everything he dreamed of and determined for you. "That’s why I’m strict with you.” He looked at you with that stoic look you never understood “Well, you know I want the best for you, my dear." You nodded, feeling a whirlwind of sensations.
This interaction was different from what you expected. Your father was a mysterious man, of few words and curious actions, but you knew he was trying his best, despite being terrible atcommunicating his own feelings.
You may need more time to talk until you finally understand what kind of person your father is, but this brief, unexpected interaction is enough for now.
“Since you want to be an attorney, then come visit my office someday.” he turned to Heeseung who was stunned by the proposal “I can give you some advice when I have time.”
“It would be an honor, sir.” He showed your father an excited smile and you held back the urge to tease him right there. He was so cute when he got excited about a subject that interested him, especially about law.
“Father, you’re going to take all his time.” You said, smiling with your eyes, and your father laughed out loud “That’s right, I came here to stop by quickly and ended up talking too much.”
Your father shook Heeseung's hand and turned to you “Come visit me later, sweetie. It's been a while since we had dinner together.” You gave a slight smile and nodded “Of course, father.”
With one last greeting he took one last look at you and Heeseung before leaving without saying anything.
A part of you felt relieved, because for the first time in years you didn't feel so awkward after interacting with your father.
“Who would have thought, I'm alive to see Lee Heeseung wanting to go to my father's office.” You mocked Heeseung and he laughed, running his hand through his hair.
“Is that how you learned to give that fake passive-aggressive smile of yours?” he asked in a comical tone looking into your eyes and you smiled gently “It’s a basic prerequisite for survival in this environment.”
“It seems like a complicated cycle.” he said gently, turning to you “It is. You need to be perfect, always.” You glanced at Heeseung, seeing how stunning he was that all you could think about was how you wanted to attack him again “But I learned to deal with it.”
He looked at you again and felt a wave of remorse hit him. Ever since you met, he had been completely stupid and unbearable with you because of assumptions he made in his mind, but the more he got to know you, the more he realized that you were completely different.
“You know, I think I’ve been misjudging you all this time.” Heeseung confessed and you were surprised by his revelation “I thought you were the kind of insufferable rich girl who had no sense of reality, but I guess I was an idiot for thinking that without getting to know you first.”
“Heeseung—” “No, let me finish.” He looked into your eyes and touched your cheek with his hand as gently as possible “I’m really sorry for being such an ass to you for so long.”
Your heart seemed to explode as you heard Heeseung's sincere words.
“In a way I judged you because you seemed like you had an easy life, while I had to fight for a lot of things.” he sighed and closed his eyes for a moment “I know this is no excuse and I was immature and stupid, but I want to start over with you. Can we?” You gave him a mischievous smile “How can I deny it when Lee Heeseung is admitting his own defeat before me?”
He smiled, taking your hand between his knuckles “I'm serious. I'm sorry for the way I acted. I think you messed with me in some way since the beginning and I didn't know how to deal with those feelings.” the way he was finally opening up and confessing why he was so unbearable made everything fit together in your mind “So that’s why you were so annoying?” your suspicious look drew a hearty laugh from Heeseung “Yes, that too, but to be honest… it's actually really fun to tease you.”
You looked at each other for a moment, making him give that damn smirk that reminded you why you get lost in Heeseung every time you get alone. “I'm really trying to contain myself here, but you're not cooperating.” He whispered and looked away, making you give a discreet laugh.
“Oh, I didn't know you got so worked up because of me.” You whispered holding his arm innocently “I’m sorry mr. Lee, it's my fault.”
Heeseung looked at you like you were the most magnificent thing on the face of the earth. Suddenly he smiled and offered his arm so you could wrap your hands around it. “You better stop, or we won’t get to enjoy the rest of this event.”
You held his arm and smiled excitedly “Why? What are you going to do?” Heeseung sighed and gave one last whisper in your ear “Or we’ll have to finish what we started in that storage room.”
And with a few words Lee Heeseung made the nervousness boil in the pit of your stomach, making you excited about the idea of doing lewd things with him.

If someone had told you at the beginning of the semester that you would now be dating Lee Heeseung and walking hand in hand around campus, you would have thought they were crazy and needed to be hospitalized. But here you were, walking with a wide smile and bright eyes, your hand intertwined with Heeseung's soft fingers.
Gaeul was the first to know and she let out such an excited scream that you swore the entire building heard it. Yes, she was clearly loving the news and repeated several times about how 'she already knew' and 'it was obvious and only you didn't realize it' , but either way it was wonderful to feel like you had your best friend's support and to see how excited she was for your happiness.
Yes, indeed you were very happy, and this was unexpected since it was something you hadn't planned, it just happened. Heeseung had taken you out to dinner, given you roses and a necklace that officially symbolized that you were together. And of course, this was much more than you expected.
Ever since you and Heeseung were chosen as project partners, your mood was constantly tested, and you swore it was the worst thing that could have happened to you this semester. However, despite the initial disagreements, you ended up seeing another side of each other and you were surprised by the person Heeseung revealed himself to be.
A wonderful and passionate man in everything he does.
“Ugh, you guys are disgustingly cute.” Jake commented as Heeseung ate his lunch after putting more tomato on your plate because one day you said you loved the cafeteria salad.
“Thanks? I guess…” Heeseung laughed at his friend’s reaction while you ate your lunch calmly.
After you started dating Heeseung, you got to know more of his friends, and because of that, you realized that you didn't interact as much with people from college, so it's good to feel that your circle of friends has increased significantly.
“I always knew you two were a good match.” Jay said, taking a drink of juice, and Gaeul agreed with him “Oh my God, yes!!! I said the same thing! But she didn’t believe me.”
“Hey, why is our relationship being a topic at lunch?” You replied and they laughed, amused by the situation.
Heeseung was in a good mood. The atmosphere was lively, comfortable, and ideal. It was as if everything was going very well.
Just one thing that was making him nervous: The lack of time for you two to be alone.
Aside from the times you needed to meet up to study and work on your project, his activities and work were cutting into your time together and it was driving him crazy. He simply wanted to spend quality time with you without having to leave quickly because of some appointment or because someone interrupted you.
That's why he had decided that that day would be just for the two of you. He had already told Jake that he wouldn't talk to anyone and that he needed to be at peace with his girlfriend. So, after much debating, he decided that he needed to be alone with you and that was the day you would finally be together.
☆
“Babe, I can't believe we finally have some free time.” Heeseung was lying on his bed completely satisfied while you were lying flat on top of him. His right hand was firmly on your waist while his left rested on your cheek. His thumb drew patterns on your skin while you played with the buttons on the collar of his shirt “I know right? I guess our project and your job took a lot of our time.”
“I was dying to be like this with you.” He confessed, sliding his hand down your back “Just you and me.” You giggled, suddenly feeling shy “Me too.” Your confession made Heeseung smile mischievously.
How good it was to know that no one would interrupt you.
“Yeah?” He smiled, giving you a kiss on the cheek, another on your nose and finally on your mouth, making you smile gently.
Heeseung knew that you had become his calm place. Where he could rest and most importantly, stay.
It was curious how you had snatched his heart completely in just 4 months.
Because despite canceling himself out daily for the goals he felt he needed to accomplish, your presence came like a thunderbolt, changing his reality and allowing Heeseung to feel things he no longer remembered how they were.
He remembered what it was like to feel genuine desire for someone. What it really meant to genuinely care for someone.
“Hmhum.” You murmured in agreement with him, feeling his hands slide gently down to your behind squeezing the skin there making you sigh with pleasure.
“Is this okay?” he asked, acting innocent as he lifted the fabric of your skirt to touch your bare skin. His wet lips slid down your cheek, heading towards your neck.
Heeseung wasn’t in a hurry. He had all the time in the world, and he was going to enjoy most of it.
“Yes.” You replied trying not to lose your senses, as Heeseung kissed your neck at the slowest pace possible “You're so pretty, baby. Did you choose this skirt just to see me?” He asked and you smiled, nodding your head.
He smiled over your skin and nibbled, making your breath tremble and moan softly. Heeseung wanted to show you how desired you were, and he would take as much time as necessary to do so.
The afternoon was calm, silent, just like the afternoon of the day you kissed for the first time. He still remembers your subtle hesitation, as if you didn't know what to do at that moment but still responded to his kiss in a way he never imagined.
With his left hand Heeseung moved up the velvety skin of your back beneath your blouse. Your skin was soft, delicate, with a velvety touch that he loved to feel.
He couldn't get enough of the contrast of how soft your skin was compared to the hardness of his hands. He kissed your jaw slowly in a way that made you close your eyes and surrender completely.
When he finally reached your lips you intertwined your fingers in his hair, pulling him towards you. How you had missed this.
Heeseung kissed you slowly, taking his time as he enjoyed the softness of your lips moving against his. He could taste a faint strawberry from the lip gloss you were wearing.
The damn lip gloss that always caught his attention.
The kiss quickly sped up as Heeseung licked your bottom lip, making you gasp and moan as his tongue entered your mouth. He was no longer patient, after all, it was very easy to lose all control when it came to you. His hands went down under your skirt and grabbed your skin, making your desperate moans be swallowed by Heeseung's mouth.
Heeseung's handprints were left on the skin of your thighs, as if they were a tattoo of his deep desire that you wanted to keep it. He kissed you eagerly, thirsty, wanting to taste every inch of your body and touch you as you deserve.
He pulled your body up tightly, holding onto your hips, making him grunt at the sensation of your body pressing over his pants. He was breathless, but he didn't want to stop kissing you. He moved away slightly to adjust himself on the bed and you felt your head spin with all the action.
Your lips were already bruised from the desperate kiss, and you felt a chill in your stomach seeing how Heeseung's mouth was red and swollen and he still wanted more. He wasn't satisfied, he wanted to taste your entire body and mark it with everything he had: his hands, his lips and his teeth.
He grabbed the hem of your shirt and his breath hitched as you sat lightly on top of him and took off your own shirt “Are you blushing Heeseung? How cute…” You teased him by holding his cheeks, seeing how red they were along with his ears. Heeseung was feeling sick at the sight of you topless, wearing only a delicate pink lace bra and your short skirt that was already rolled up.
“Yeah.” Your hands rested on his chest, feeling his heartbeat at a frantic pace. He was so mesmerized by you that he could barely respond. His eyes roamed over your curves and he swallowed hard as he ran his hands up the skin of your torso, sending shivers down your spine.
“You're so beautiful, baby.” He whispered into your neck as he marked your skin with his teeth making you weak “Want to see more of you.” You pulled Heeseung’s face towards you, kissing him intensely. The mixture of your breaths with the suffocating encounter of your tongues made the air around you heat up.
Your hands pulled Heeseung's black shirt up as he helped you by giving you desperate kisses. Your body heated up at the sight of Heeseung's defined abs and you slid your fingertips across his skin, making Heeseung moan.
Heeseung wrapped his arms around you and turned you around, placing your body on the mattress and climbing on top of you.
He was absolutely breathtaking.
The strands of his bangs tickled your nose as he kissed you passionately. Your fingers gripped the back of his neck and your nails scratched the skin there, making him let out low grunts that made you even hotter.
Your hands slid down Heeseung's toned back as he trailed kisses along your jaw, down the line of your throat, kissing over the skin of your chest.
Heeseung made it his personal goal to mark all the skin on your body with his mouth if that was possible. He kissed and marked with hickeys whatever was possible while his hand squeezed the skin of your chest under your bra making you whimper.
With his right hand he moved up your back touching the clasp of your bra, opening it as he kissed the skin of your belly going lower and lower.
Amidst your sighs, Heeseung in one action took off your skirt and underwear, leaving you a little embarrassed and shocked with his dexterity.
Instinctively you closed your legs as he looked at you, feeling that his self-control had already disappeared. You were completely perfect.
But he wanted more.
Your soft skin seemed to glow with the small beams of light that escaped from his bedroom window. You were there, beneath him without clothes, and he was sure that you were the most beautiful woman in the world.
No one would ever compare to you.
“Don't be shy, I want to taste you.” he got on his knees, touched the top of your knees and slid down your legs looking at you between his messy bangs as you felt your heart explode inside your chest “Spread your legs for me, baby.”
Your insides churned with agitation, and you obeyed him slowly, feeling your cheeks heat up at the bold way he spoke.
Heeseung's gaze changed. He looked determined, insatiable, and desperate to taste every part of your skin.
He stood between your legs, kissing down your belly to the lower part of your stomach, holding onto your thighs, making you place your hand on his face, caressing him lightly. He felt his heart melt at your affection.
Heeseung placed his face in the palm of your hand, placing a tender kiss on the inside of your skin. He nuzzled into the warmth of your hand before giving you a lewd look that made your breath catch.
He kissed your thighs, making you anxious. His dark brown hair revealed reddish highlights from the light and you noticed the small mole he had on his forehead.
There was no denying that Heeseung was beautiful. And he was all yours.
Every time you felt Heeseung's mouth marking your skin, your breath hitched, and you closed your eyes at the overwhelming sensation. He didn't fail to notice how soaked you were already, making his pants tighten.
Heeseung devoured you with desire. He was relentless, savoring and sucking on your skin at an insane pace, as if he was starving. At times, he looked at you, taking it your reactions and feeling a sense of pride fill his chest at how desperate you looked by his marks. Your hands pulled his dark locks, making him grunt as you became numb with pleasure.
Your legs were wobbly, but Heeseung held on tightly while he marked more spots on your skin. You noticed how the veins on his forearms ran up to the back of his hands.
At that moment he was incredibly sexy.
You could not form comprehensible words, only broken moans and loud sighs that couldn't be translated.
“Feels so good, Hee.” You almost cried and Heeseung felt his heart clench at the way you called him “More.”
Heeseung on the other hand loved it all. He loved losing himself in you and seeing how desperate you became as he skillfully worked your body.
“Fuck—” He took a deep breath and gave a shaky sigh before sucking another spot at your inner thigh “Say that again, princess.”
“More, Hee—” Your voice could barely finish his name while Heeseung felt his pressure rise at the sound of your voice and panting moans.
As you melted under Heeseung's mouth, he held your hips so they wouldn't move up while he continued to kiss your bare skin from your lower stomach up to your mouth.
He gave you a tender peck on the corner of your mouth “You taste so good baby.” He whispered in your ear, sending shivers down your spine as you felt his hands roam over your body possessively “I want to make you mine.”
“Please.” You nodded with your eyes closed “I need you.” He smiled and kissed you once more as his right hand combed through your hair, intertwining his fingers in the strands on your scalp.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, kissing him madly, hoping he would understand all the feelings you wanted to deliver intrinsically with your kiss.
With ragged breathing he got to his knees, undoing his belt, while you tried to recover from everything that happened.
His forehead was wet with sweat and some strands of his bangs stuck to his skin. You felt your body tremble with anticipation, biting your lower lip at the sight of Heeseung giving a mocking smirk while not taking his eyes off you.
“How do you want it?” he teased you as he took off his pants, seeing how completely needy you were for his touch “Slow?” he took off his piece of clothing, hovering over you “or rough?”
A shiver ran down your spine at the question and he smiled watching as you closed your legs lightly around his hips at the last suggestion.
“Rough, huh?” He pulled your body closer by your hips and straddled you again “Is that right?”
That afternoon would be all about you. Heeseung decided that making you feel good would be his top priority and nothing else mattered. If you wanted it rough, he would give you exactly that.
“Yes.” You replied in a low whisper feeling your chest heave with excitement and Heeseung brushed his lips over yours “Yeah? You're so naughty, baby.” he bit his lower lip holding your wrists beside your head “You have this innocent pretty face, but you like it rough, huh?”
He crashed his lips into you with a deep kiss again, exploring your entire mouth violently with his tongue. He came to the conclusion that he would never get tired of your lips.
It was a messy, wet, intense and completely overwhelming kiss. Heeseung released your wrists, wrapping you in his arms, pulling your body into him, making your stomach knot with his aggression.
Your moans were swallowed by Heeseung's mouth as the pressure of his body on yours drove you crazy. He began attacking your neck with open kisses as he positioned himself between your legs.
“Please, Hee.” Heeseung smiled seeing how you begged for him. Just like the way he always dreamed of “I want you so bad.”
Your hands grabbed his strong shoulders, and he sucked in a breath, trying to control himself with the ecstatic sensation of your body enveloping him completely “You want me, baby?” Heeseung members were shaking as he heard your delirious whimpers in anticipation “So, be good for me and wait like a good girl.”
Heeseung's heartbeat was already racing in an insane rhythm as he held onto your hips tightly, sinking it into the mattress, but not giving what you wanted. “S-Stop teasing, Hee.” You whispered in despair, and he breathlessly moaned, feeling your nails scratching the back of his head between your choking whimpers.
“Sorry baby, I just wanna take my time with you.” While you felt Heeseung’s body completely over yours, your nails sank down the length of his beautiful, toned back, scratching his skin, and your forehead rested on his shoulder, hiding your face. Heeseung grabbed your jaw and pulled your face to him, kissing you, making your eyes water slightly “Look at me.” he whispered with a shaky breath over your mouth “I want to see your pretty face.”
“Hah—” You opened your slightly blurry eyes and could barely respond to Heeseung, who was breathing irregularly, adjusting himself at the perfect position “C'mon baby, you can take it.” he whispered, wrecking you completely.
Heeseung felt butterflies in his stomach seeing the sight of you beneath him writhing in pleasure. It was lewd, sexy and scorching. It was everything he wanted: to see you completely surrendered under him while he roughly handled you.
He finally realized that every day he discovered more reasons to love you, and he was happy that your love story was just starting.
At that moment, nothing else crossed your mind other than his name: Heeseung. So, you allowed yourself to give yourself completely to Heeseung and fall apart under his touch and the intoxicating feeling of his body on top of yours, giving you everything you wanted most.
☆
After a long bath and more stolen kisses, you were cuddling on Heeseung's bed while he stroked your hair.
“I'm so tired.” He said, smelling his shampoo on your damp hair “I need to sleep for about 10 hours straight to recover.”
You laughed and gave him a kiss on the cheek “How a college student would find time to sleep for 10 hours?”
“I don’t know, but I’ll find a way.” he touched your cheek with the back of his fingers, caressing the spot “And you? Are you tired?” You nodded as you let yourself be numbed by the smell of Heeseung’s perfume “This semester killed me.”
“I know right? It feels like we didn’t even have a break.” He stroked your hair affectionately “And speaking of breaks… my dad wants you to have dinner with us next time.” You spoke in an uncertain tone, afraid of Heeseung’s reaction to the sudden invitation “Really?” He smiled at the corner of his mouth and looked at you, noticing how shy you were “Yes, at the last dinner we had he mentioned that he wanted me to invite you. I think deep down he realized that there was something between us since the day of the foundation event.” Heeseung chuckled remembering the interaction they had.
You felt more comfortable seeing how excited Heeseung seemed with the invitation “Sure, I’ll go.” he looked at you with a loving look that filled your chest “And how was dinner?”
“It was kinda weird… but nice.” Heeseung noticed a slight smile on your face. You usually had a strange relationship with your father, but ever since the day of the foundation event it seemed like your father had shown a new side. “We didn’t talk much, but I think I’m finally understanding a bit how my father’s mind works.”
Heeseung remained silent, leaving you comfortable to vent “Did you talk about your plans of not working on his office after graduation?” you smiled a bit “Kinda... I talked about the informal invitations I received from other offices, and he seemed neutral. He said I should analyze the opportunities that will come my way very carefully.”
“That sounds like a good answer.” Heeseung commented and you nodded “I feel like since my dad spent most of his time working to give me the best, we never really talked much, but now I think he’s trying, in his own way.”
“Maybe he’s not good with words, but he seems to care about you.” Heeseung stroked your cheek with his thumb “It was always like that, he never said much, but he tried his best.”
“Well, at least you had the courage to tell him about the proposals you received and now you can rest easy.” You smiled and gave Heeseung a long kiss that melted his heart “Yes, thank you for listening to me, baby.”
“Of course, love.” He gave you a long kiss on the cheek and looked into your eyes with an amused look “So… does that mean your father likes me?” Heeseung wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, giving you that confident smile that made you push his face away as he laughed “Oh, here you go again...”
“What? It's true.” He watched you run your fingers through his hair “I’m the best son-in-law he could ask for.”
You gave a mocking smile seeing Heeseung's confidence “And to think that I'm dating you... maybe I've gone crazy.” He pulled you by the waist, giving you a hug from behind and a kiss on the back of your neck “Yes... crazy about me.”
Yes, you had to admit that he was right.
You were crazy about Heeseung.

Mrs. Jung was attentive with a serene and calm expression as she watched you present your project. The entire class seemed impacted by the union of the best students in the course creating an impeccable synchronization. It was impressive how you were able to complement each other on the points where each of you had difficulty.
You and Heeseung were a duo that seemed to be perfect for chaos, but right now, everything seemed to fall into place as you showcased your incredible project with unique nuances. From the beginning, you overcame many barriers to give your best, and finally you could reap the fruits of your hard work.
“In conclusion, we must recognize that this evolution of human rights within international law is of utmost importance. In short, International States are not only composed of power and sovereignty, but also of individuals who need to be protected and guarded.” Heeseung naturally confidently ended his part by introducing the final conclusion of the project. It was clear that this was the environment in which he felt comfortable, presenting something he had the authority to speak about.
“And therefore, the protection of human rights is not just a mere internal concern of each Internacional State, but also of the entire global legal system.” You finish the presentation to the sound of polite applause filling the room. Mrs. Jung gave a satisfied smile and stood up from her chair holding the evaluation clipboard she was holding.
“I must say, when I paired you up I knew you had potential, but I’m immensely surprised.” You swallowed hard, fearing her assessment, since she was known as a strict teacher. “You decided to approach a complex topic, but the way you both explored and conducted the research was very interesting. It was a pleasant surprise, I’m very satisfied.”
Heeseung and you looked at each other, feeling flattered by the teacher’s praise. “Thank you very much, Mrs. Jung.” You thanked her and went to sit in your seats with smiles on your faces.
As Mrs. Jung called the next pair, Heeseung was feeling elated. You had finally finished this project and you had definitely gotten top marks, but the best part was knowing that he had won the best prize: you.
Heeseung's hand touched your thigh discreetly under the table and you turned to him trying not to smile. "Hee! What are you doing? We're in class!” You whispered in his ear and he gave a small smile “Relax, I'm just recovering my energy.”
You gave an airy laugh and placed your hand over his, intertwining your fingers “Can't believe I'm dating you.” He gave a closed-mouth smile and leaned down to your ear “I know, right? You're so lucky…” Heeseung whispered in an ironic tone and you held back from laughing.
“Oh, please.” You commented playfully “I’m trying to concentrate here, Hee.” Heeseung sighed and squeezed your hand before placing an affectionate kiss on your palm “My bad, baby. You're so pretty I lost my focus.” You rolled your eyes but felt your heart flutter “So cheesy…”
“But you love it.” He smiled and turned to the front.
You really loved the antics of Lee Heeseung, your former rival, project partner and best boyfriend you could ask for.
☆
1 YEAR LATER
Lying in your bed while reading a doctrine was Heeseung's guilty pleasure. Your mattress was much softer than his, your pillows were super comfortable, and the sweet smell of the bamboo air freshener you bought was chef's kiss.
He was calm, reading one of your favorite criminal law books that you had recommended due to the author's impeccable didactics. Your eyes scanned his figure, admiring his concentration.
He was wearing glasses, with messy hair and a black tank top that definitely wasn't cooperating with your thoughts. He looked too perfect, too good for someone who was just reading.
You usually loved doing your makeup or any other kind of activity while Heeseung read something in your room. Even the silence was comfortable between you because of his warm presence.
But today you couldn't concentrate properly. Heeseung was too handsome, and it was disturbing your mind. How dare he be so sexy like that without even trying?
It was unfair how he was so mesmerized by his book that he didn't realize how needy you were just by the sight of Heeseung in your bed.
You climbed onto your bed and crawled towards him, who seemed more focused than ever. When Heeseung felt your weight on his lap, he looked up from his book and stared at your angelic face. “What are you doing?” You smiled, pulling the book down “You need a break.”
“Babe, I was finally getting the grip of The Fruit of the Poisonous Tree theory!” He groaned feeling your body rub against the fabric of his pants “I’m just getting rid of your stress.” You said innocently as you placed the book on another corner of the bed “My stress? I think you are getting rid of your stress, miss.”
He held onto your waist, watching you hold onto his chubby cheeks. It was disconcerting how he could be cute and sexy at the same time. “Okay, maybe you’re right, but I still think a break would be good to you.” You gave him a peck on the lips that made him smile over your mouth.
“Yeah?” he asked, fitting his face into your neck “I guess I need a break then.” You sighed, feeling him run his lips along the length of your neck and smiled against your skin “Great.” your fingers intertwined in Heeseung’s soft hair, making him grunt and attack your mouth.
With your left hand you took off Heeseung's glasses and threw them on the bed as you deepened the kiss. His hands slid down your torso, eliciting broken moans from you.
As your senses were lost in Heeseung, your cell phone vibrated with the notification of your email.
We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected for an internship position at our law firm. We look forward to receiving your answer as soon as possible. — Jung & Taylor Legal Advisors
Perhaps your and Heeseung's journey into the legal world was just in the beginning.
☆
☆
taglist:
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I realized I never actually made a post about my trans senku headcanons because I keep thinking everyone already knows them fjshdjskdb. Anyway it’s pride here they are plus some new ones, some of which are inspired by Teavat’s fic:
Byakuya the bestest most supportive dad of all time who WILL make dumb puns about it (obvious)
The characters in Senku’s name seem neutral enough that he could have not chosen a new one, so I typically write it as having been his birth name
Little Taiju accepted the existence of trans people super easily but also asked the question “why would you not like being a girl though? Girls are so cool!”
Little Taiju bless his soul asking “what would my trans name be?”
Senku being extremely enthusiastic about explaining HRT to people and Chrome finding it endlessly fascinating
Making dumb puns HIMSELF about things like transistors/transformers/trans-atlantic crossing
Bonding with Yuzuriha because she helped find/alter/straight up make him clothes that he actually likes as they get older and his body changes
There was a moment as teens when Yuzuriha spun him around to a mirror so he could see himself in a properly tailored shirt, pants, and tie and he was like “yeah it’s adequate, thanks,” while trying not to cry
Also bonding with Yuzuriha through commiserating over period struggles. They both have Opinions about the menstrual product industry
Being really excited to learn that “Dr. X” is also a trans man and a rocket scientist
Could totally have made his own testosterone if he wanted (Xeno is supportive) but decided that was the one legal line he refused to cross because of how it might reflect on his dad and so was waiting to get treatment once he turned 18
Coming out to most people ridiculously casually but going out of his way to come out to Gen in a way that drives the guy insane for shits and giggles, like saying something like “yeah no I lost my dick in the accident” and then not elaborating for weeks
Complex inside jokes with François that no one else understands
“What if I used the Medusa to petrify myself and then had Kohaku carefully knock off my boobs” “What if you did anything the normal way ever”
I think it’d be cute if Suika’s friend Namari was a trans girl and was inspired by Senku to explore her gender
Lying about trans people having special powers like mind reading and laser eyes (Chrome doesn’t buy it, but Ginro…)
Bittersweet celebration of his first time using T after years of redevelopment in the stone world because Byakuya isn’t there to celebrate with him
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Hello Mrs Edge and Tom. I don't have an account here so I'm using my husband's. I am the "ebony goddess wife" of KC. You posted his message here a few weeks ago.
I want to echo what he said about your blog being so helpful to me (to both of us really). When he showed me this chastity stuff I was turned off by just about everything I saw and I really did not want to think about my husband as a sissy or abused or anything like that. I have read a lot of your answers to questions and I love how you have made chastity about your husband's devotion and not just some kinky sex thing. That is where I am hoping to bring our marriage. Also I am guessing it must be Tom who picks out the pictures but it really has been nice to see images of regular looking black women (and Asian, Indian, etc) and not images that look like cartoons. They help me feel more comfortable about seeing myself the way my husband sees me.
I did want to comment about the crazy changes that have been happening to me for the past few years. I go from feeling cold to getting hot flashes that make me want to tear off my clothes and not in a good way. And I don't "feel like myself" anymore. I want to be intimate with my husband but sometimes I can't even stand the thought of having sex.
I go from feeling guilty for keeping him locked to thinking that if I feel this bad then maybe he should too! lol I've read the questions from other women in "no penetration" marriages. I had no idea that this was a thing until recently but now I understand why. The few times I have tried are just uncomfortable and don't really do anything for me for some reason.
Sometimes when I feel like an orgasm would make me feel better I do make him worship my pussy. It also helps to keep him interested which helps make me feel less guilty about leaving him locked up all the time. I also remind him that he asked for this but I have to admit that he rarely complains.
I am happy to see that you still get pleasure from PIV and you still allow your husband to get pleasure from intercourse although I'm not sure how much pleasure he gets if he has to wear a strap on lol. But I am seriously wondering if I will ever feel like having sex again - I mean intercourse - with my husband. If you have any advice on getting through this I think it would be helpful to a lot of us! lol
Thank you for following up on your husband's post. I totally understand what you mean by you "don't feel like yourself." My change came a bit earlier than most, and it was several years of hot flashes, night sweats, cold spells, and crazy appetite swings. Nothing felt right, and I started gaining weight. My doctor says that my metabolism slowed way down, I was tired, and the last thing I wanted was my husband bothering me for intimate time. When you are not comfortable in your own skin it's just so hard to relax and enjoy intimacy.
It really did take several years for me to get past the perimenopause and have things start settling down. Yes, my husband was locked up for most of it, not that he really needed to be because sex just was not on the table (or anywhere else 😆) anyway. I don't want to say that he was "locked and forgotten" but honestly he might as well have been. A few times I did offer that he just unlock the cage and take it off, more out of sympathy or pity or something. To his credit he remained caged on his own.
When I finally started feeling better, we did get back to intercourse and foxing. Fortunately I did not get the vaginal pain that so many women get after menopause. However, things were definitely different. My lubrication was very thin, and I would get sore more easily. We went through different lubes (and now we us organic coconut butter from Trader Joes lol). Oh, and I'm a lot more prone to UTIs. I used to think it was the vixskin, but boiling and disinfecting didn't help. My gyno told me that it was a common condition, and she gave me some antibiotics which I take a dose of whenever we have sex.
Now, if you are not enjoying intercourse and your gyno can't make any suggestions, it's okay. You already keep your husband locked, so he has already learned... or is learning... how to manage his own libido and how to turn his energy into pleasing you instead of worrying about his own orgasm. This is why I tell women who message me that they do not need to feel guilty about this change in your sex life. He asked for this... to be locked and for you to take charge. This is one of those things that happen in life that you have no control over, so all you can do is control how you deal with the situation.
I am learning that there are more "no penetration" marriages than I ever would have guessed, and while a lot of them are done out of some kind of kinky game, some of them, like yours are more because Mother Nature was not kind. If this is the way you are leaning, please remember that your husband wants all the best for you. You can still reward him with your hands or by letting him rub himself on you (he must have a favorite place lol), and then lock him back up. Or you can use a vibrator to help take the pressure off of him. If you have read some of the other women's stories that have written in, some men find the idea of being denied penetration to be a turn on.
Finally, please keep an open mind. You may come out of this once again being able to enjoy intercourse, at least, when you start feeling somewhat normal... or rather, when all these things that are happening start settling down. And there are a lot of resources and articles for you to check online. You may not feel better about it but at least you'll know that you are not alone. Best of luck hon and let me know how you're doing.

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Your boy has begun learning quads!!!

•ﻌ•𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯⋆ᓚᘏᗢ⋆♡⋆ᗢᘏᓗ⋆𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯•ﻌ•
Honestly, I never thought I'd be the type of therian that preforms Quadrobics. For a while I honestly thought quads were cringy and a surefire way of determining someone's validity as a nonhuman. But, as I've done more research and saw the joy it brought other Nonhumans, I began to feel jealous. They all look so free, happy, and confident. I wanted to be like them
•ﻌ•𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯⋆ᓚᘏᗢ⋆♡⋆ᗢᘏᓗ⋆𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯•ﻌ•
The problem, though, is that I have unmedicated chronic pain. Even just laying in bed is painful if I don't constantly flip myself around like rolling hotdog. So, I never really entertained the idea of doing quads all that much. Instead, I daydreamed about what it would feel like to be on all fours, to be feral.
But, for the past month or so, I've been getting better at understanding that, no matter what I do, I will always be in pain. And if I want to have any sort of quality of life, I need to learn how to be okay with that. I can't just rot in bed all the time as a way to avoid being in even worse pain, you know? If I have to be in pain, at least it's on MY terms.
•ﻌ•𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯⋆ᓚᘏᗢ⋆♡⋆ᗢᘏᓗ⋆𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯•ﻌ•
So, today I finally made the decision to begin learning Quadrobics. I set a bunch of rules to make sure I don't push myself too far or do something that could lead me to injury. I must stretch, hydrate, and asses my pain/energy levels before I even THINK of my front paws touching the floor.
I watched a bunch of different tutorials, stretched, and began learning how to walk. And it was... Interesting. I won't lie, it was extremely fun and affirming. But, it was also really scary and exhaustive. I underestimated how difficult it would be. I was unbalanced, my posture was all off, it was hard to breathe, and the whole time I felt like I was just falling. Just 30 seconds of walking was exhausting. I would do one lap around my basement, and pause for a few minutes to catch my breath. Then do another loop.
In total, I believe I completed about 10 loops today, and improved each time. But, there is still a LOT of learning and improvement I need to do. It's probably gonna take me a few months to feel confident and comfortable in my walk. I need to learn how to adjust my speed, to trust that I won't fall, to position myself more comfortably so I can breathe properly, and allow myself to slowly get into things so my heart doesn't explode lol
•ﻌ•𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯⋆ᓚᘏᗢ⋆♡⋆ᗢᘏᓗ⋆𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯•ﻌ•
All-in-all I am excited to start this journey and to have a new way to express my alterhumanity! It's gonna be a very slow process of building muscle, memory, rhythm, and posture. But, I feel hopeful! My pain/discomfort levels are good, and I feel excited to do more!
I don't know if I'm ever going to post videos of me doing quads as I do not have a mask and would like to remain anonymous. But, if you all find this interesting I may document my journey here through text!
•ﻌ•𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯⋆ᓚᘏᗢ⋆♡⋆ᗢᘏᓗ⋆𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯𐂯•ﻌ•
Anyway! (Unrelated rambles ahead) I know this post is longer than my usual, so, if you've read this far.. thank you! I've never been super good at summarizing my thoughts, and I'm not sure if anyone even reads these beyond the header. But, it's fun to write regardless! I enjoy letting you all in on this side of my life, and I'm incredibly thankful for the community we have here. I love you all and am once again so happy to be back! I have another long post coming in very soon and I hope y'all like it!
#tigerkin#sumatran tigerkin#sumatrantigerkin#feline otherkin#feline therian#felinekin#holotherian#holothere#physically nonhuman#physical therian#nonhuman community#nonhumanity#non human#alterhuman#therian#otherkin#nonhuman#therianthropy#alterhumanity#therian things#therianadult#therianlife#otherkith#theriotype#therianthrope#adult therian#therians#cat therian#alterhuman community#alterbeing
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The full description for those curious.
Unfortunately I was a fucking excited dumbass and bought the patreon yesterday before scrolling down to see her latest works.

I think one of the things that bugs me the MOST in all of this is the aged up design used is diffrent to the one she has made in the past, this uh 'aged up' design resembling more towards Aliza when she first fell but w b**bs (sorry idk tumblrs censoring system too well), than the adult design SAS posted in 2022. I do have access to the full pic bc again I was the idiot that bought the patreon thing before noticing the uh top posts but here's a comparison of the free to view thumbnail (again even tho I have access to the premium one I dont wanna download it or share it both for personal morals and also idk patrons tos that well and also PERSONAL MORALS)
Left is the.. mmm.... right is the adult design she posted on twitter in 2022. Again this is nit picky but just a personal uhm idk the word it hurts? Feels gross.

Again at this point in time I have no idea what to believe rn and ik I'm just being bias and uh parasocial to the media but I truly truly hope shes not a pdf and is just an idiot that drew it in poor taste as like a self insert type thing but again I DONT THINK SO?? I THINK IM JUST IN DENIAL??? IDK it's horrible it's a nightmare and thank you to those who came out abt it on my behalf, genuinely I don't know how to feel about this
Horrortale has meant so much to me, as it has for so so many other people. The fandom has been so wholesome and I want to send my love to the others that were really attached to this fandom too. It's been such a long going series with alot of original and interesting stuff I just hhhtkhdihskhshahananaaaaaa. I know its an escape for alot of people not just me. Both the cannon and fannon stuff
Althought personally I'm still ripped apart, i think it's fine to still read the comic as long as you don't interact with the material? Idk. It's up to you. I am still personally torn and just really wish this never happened
Anyways I'm still very new to posting on tumblr but if your able to comment under here without it bugging froggo (idk if tumblr let's you do that if you repost or if it goes straight to the original post??) But if if is just like a thing where it's only under my post then feel free to type out your own feelings qnd experiences with the fandom
I wanna thank my friends for being there for me the past 24 hours, it's genuinely meant alot being able to talk about this with others and their patience with my rants about this really really means more than I can say, so uh I wanna pay that fowards I guess, feel free to rant in the replies or anonymously in the asks if you want, I wont post them unless like I have something to add to it ig
Uhm yeah heart goes out to everyone and big thank you to my friends (idk if I should say here or not bc yk but yk who you are) uhm genuinely ik I haven't shown it much but after the irl shit that's happened before this and then discovering this, your support has meant everything to me
Ok I'm rambling bye

Horrortale’s creator caught proshipping
This just in folks, Horrortale’s creator Sour Apple Studios caught not only proshipping BUT making suggestive art of an original character WHO IS A MINOR
June 1st, the pride month before the fall, the patron unveiled this here post featuring not only Aliza’s rear end as front and center but said rear end being on Sans Horrortale’s lap. Thats right, the creator is stepping above and beyond in “what the fuck”age by not only inventing a minor character but making self-described mature art about them.
Using my newfound knowledge of how to DO a read more Ive even included the proof below the read more, it’s also publicly viewable on the website at this point in time and while the way back machine doesn’t seem to be loading the images you can at least confirm the text matches with these disgusting, distasteful screenshots


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Thoughts about Feyre and the sister dynamics
So, I'm just getting better, I'm not 100% well, but I'm still trying to re-read Acotar and... I must say that this time I did take another look at Feyre's dynamic with her sister, Nesta and Elain.
Especially in retrospect in how most of the fandom perceived both Nesta (mostly) and Elain in a bad light thanks to those first few chapters, because of how they treated Feyre, but... It's way overexaggerated. In my opinion. Or unwarranted if I dare say.
Ok, these are just my takes, me going deep because I can and I have fun in doing so. (Long rambling ahead!)
For this post I will concentrate only on the 2nd chapter of Acotar, but I'll come later with the rest. Anyway, this is the chapter in which the Archeron family, Feyre's father, and sisters, are introduced to us readers, and what it gives us is a premise of an already existing tension/situation in the home.
Something that happened outside of what we see. Of what even Feyre herself tells us.
There's already bitterness in everything Feyre's sees and think about her sisters, how Elain is surprised by what she brought home - how she doesn't comment about the blood -
"Where did you get that?" "Where do you think I got it?"
In this passage there's even Feyre being bitter that their mother made her make that promise. But what I want to focus on this is... Elain is surprised to see Feyre, to see her with a deer. Maybe it's the sheer of the prey she got (a little doe, yes, that she slumped on the table, that she took from the forest, in a place farther away than she used to go: Feyre is strong) or maybe there's something else.
"Feyre. What luck you had today - in bringing us such a feast." From beside my father, Nesta snorted.
Now, in this passage, Feyre takes this snort from Nesta as a critique/insult toward her, her accomplishment, but before and after she keeps underlining how Nesta ignored their father, how she belittles him... Resents him. So, I actually took it as her 'snort' being directed towards their father. Who didn't do anything for them.
But Feyre is quick to take it as an attack toward herself, even if immediately after she thinks this: And any words from our father usually resulted in her ridicule as well.
MHM.
Another thing: in this whole chapter Feyre keeps mentioning how Nesta resents their father. How she was the one who saved him from the beating thanks to her soiling herself and after she vomited the men left - while Elain and Nesta hid themself in their room. AND at the same time she hates him, she resents him too. But condemn Nesta for expressing the same feelings she has.
But at least Nesta didn't fill our head with useless talk of regaining our wealth like our father. / When my father still couldn't - wouldn't - move much about, he hadn't argued when I announced that I was going hunting. He hadn't bothered to stand from his seat by the fire, hadn't bothered to look up from his wood carving. He let me walk into those deadly, eerie woods that even the most seasoned hunters were wary of.
Mhm... I feel anger in these words, in her thoughts towards their father. So much resentment. AND, just to push this: He hadn't argued, he hadn't bothered, he LET ME walk into these deadly eerie woods.
Now, a great part of a certain side of the fandom loves to blame Nesta (and in some ways Elain) about letting Feyre go hunting, but guess who she blames? THEIR FATHER. BECAUSE HE IS THE ONE WHO SHOULD'VE DONE SOMETHING.
And, since I can push it more, this passage - to me - gives me that someone did argue, bothered and wouldn't want to let her walk into these woods, who? The sisters, maybe mainly Nesta. Why do I think this? Because she's focusing on her father who didn't, on the one who didn't protest. Do something.
And now, back to Feyre with the deer, the surprise of Elain, how in the first chapter she says "Hunger had brought me farther from home than I usually risked". Those deadly, eerie woods that even the most seasoned hunters were wary of. Maybe her sisters begged her to not go there, that far. But, one thing we learn quickly, is that she doesn't accept a no. Feyre does what she wants. She is the one who holds control and power. The last word.
Now, about Nesta comment: "You stink like a pig covered in its own filth. Can't you at least try to pretend that you're not an ignorant peasant?"
Now, remember: Feyre is covered in blood, guts, and Nesta is even touching her cloak. And she has just slammed a corpse on their table, where they eat. Idk about you, but this comment is the least of things, and look how she emphasized that try. Something tells me they did discuss more about this.
And then, Feyre's thinks this:
Older than me by three years, she somehow looked younger than I did.
Her oldest sister, of three years older, in her eyes looks younger than herself. Because Feyre sees herself as the caregiver of her family, the matriarch. She has a right to their money. Not even their father. She decides who to give it to. She hides it from Nesta. She is the one who has power and control over her family.
The chopping wood discussion to me felt more like spite trowed to Feyre by Nesta. Because we know that she does cut the wood, she does it in these chapters, but her words? Feels like a taunt, a reproach.
"I hate chopping wood. I always get splinters." She glanced up from beneath her dark lashes. Of all of us, Nesta looked the most like our mother - especially when she wanted something. "Besides, Feyre," she said with a pout, "you're so much better at it! It takes you half the time it takes me. Your hands are suited for it - they're already so rough" [...] Elain murmured a soft plea to Nesta, which earned a hiss in response. [...] "Get the knives ready," I said, not bothering to sound pleasant. "I'll be out soon." Without warning for an answer, I shut the door behind me.
To me this exchange feels like Feyre did comment on Nesta's nails, about her softer hands in the past. Maybe she did critique her on her technique, how she wasn't fast enough, and how she compared them. So Nesta taunts her with her words. "You're so much better at it!" She even pouts. Nesta. Elain then murmurs a plea to her and look how Feyre is like: get the knives, I'll be out soon. Like they HAVE to do what she said. No way to go against it or to say anything on the matter. This could have happened more than once. In different contests.
Then here they dine and - once again - she is in charge on how much everyone can eat. Her, not their father, no opinion taken from Nesta or Elain. She let them take another round, but no more than that. No discussion about it. And here is the dinner, the one thing that actually made me want to make this post, lol, it took me long enough ahaha.
Anyway, another thing that becomes evident during it is how unreliable she is when she listens to her sisters's gossip:
Since we had lost our fortune, their former friends dutifully ignored them, so my sisters paraded about as though the young peasants of the town made up a second-rate social circle / "We're in love," Nesta declared, and Elain nodded her agreement. I almost laughed - when had they gone from mooning over aristos to making doe-eyes at peasants?
A little biased, aren't we Feyre? On how she perceives everything Nesta says as a critique/insult and how she sees the same people they live around/with. AND how she doesn't really listen and sees how both Elain and Nesta have changed: when had they gone from mooning to doe-eyes? I WONDER IT TOO. They sure had, they even made FRIENDS, unlike you.
Then here is their discussion: it starts after Elain says that Tomas wants to marry Nesta.
I blinked. Nesta cocked her head. I'd seen predators use that movement before. "Is there a problem, Feyre?" she flung my name like an insult.
I truly wonder what expression she had when she "blinked". How she compared Nesta cocking her head to a predator and her question? The way she said her name? Nesta was preparing herself to affront the discussion that was coming. The judgment. She was steeling herself. And indeed, Feyre didn't miss.
"You can't chop wood for us, but you want to marry a woodcutter's son?" Nesta squared her shoulders. "I thought all you wanted was for us to get out of the house - to marry off me and Elain so you can have enough time to paint your glorious masterpieces."
Nesta squared her shoulders and then she said these words that for sure Feyre did say more than once, the one she probably threw at them during the heat of a fight. As she thought: Some days, I couldn't tell which of us was the most wretched and bitter.
And the fact is: she wants them out of her life, off her shoulders. She thinks this more than once. Not to say how she underline how they have no dowry ("We can't afford a dowry, for either of you") ad the way she does so is not as a younger sister, no. She's thinking like a parent, a father/mother worried about the fate of her daughters. Again, she put herself as the caregiver of her sisters.
But before I go further, here's another moment where Feyre is biased in her narrative, when the read and the situation itself feel differently:
I laid my palms flat on the table as I stared her down, Elain removed her hand from where it lay nearby, as if the dirt and blood beneath my fingernails would somehow jump onto her porcelain skin. "Tomas's family is barely better off than ours," I said, trying to keep from growling.
She thinks that Elain retreats her hand because she's afraid of her staining her "porcelain skin", but... What if she did that to take herself out from the tension, from the line of fire? Feyre laid her palms flat on the table, staring down Nesta. She almost growls. She is strong. I'm not saying that Feyre did ever hit the sisters, but... sometimes fear is prevalent. Elain taking her hand away from hers could've been her way to escape the situation, maybe the wrath of Feyre. And not because she was afraid she would be stained. Yes, maybe she didn't grow vegetables, but Elain did take to gardening. She does stain her hands. So this is only a bias Feyre has toward herself, and toward her sisters. She's insecure about her appearance, and how she is wilder in compared to them.
This felt like a way for Elain to guard herself.
Then... Feyre tells Nesta she's a burden and Nesta does lash out.
I've seen it being talked again and again on how what she says is unforgivable, but... let's see what she actually says:
"What do you know?" Nesta breathed. "You're just a half-wild beast with the nerve to bark orders at all hours of the day and night. Keep it up, and someday - someday, Feyre, you'll have no one left to remember you, or to care that you ever existed." [...] I'd heard the words before - and knew she only repeated them because I'd flinched that first time she spat them.
She doesn't say that others will not remember or care she exists. She is saying: if you keep barking orders at all hours of the day, being controlling... you will be left with no one to remember you. To care about you. Because she would have pushed them away and this is not the first time this has been said.
Feyre then looks to their father, ask him to do something, to make see reason to Nesta, but her father doesn't. She reset him more about it.
And guess who, in the future, will help her to get control over her sister? Rhysand.
Boom, mic drop.
Sorry, I had to dfdsfsdfd.
Anyway, this long ass post, with mostly me rambling, was to say that: who had the power in their home was never Nesta or Elain or even their father - who was supposed to be THE ONE - but Feyre. Who then is living contradiction.
And I would like to say more, but I've already written too much and I hope all of this makes sense lol
#acotar#acotar critical#feyre critical#pro nesta#pro nesta archeron#nesta archeron#elain archeron#anti papa archeron#me ranting and rambling#am I reading too much into it? Probably#Will I still do more on it? OBVS#It's fun to me and anyway... it sucked for all of them and no Nesta didn't abuse Feyre and that side of the fandom condems her for sins#she doesn't have/hold even if in the next books she feels like she has to#No Nesta bby it wasn't you or your fault it was your father#Even Feyre resents him so much and THEN SHE GIVES HIS UNKOWN NAME TO HER SON#Just know I'm rolling so hard my eyes#Anyway thank you for being here and having read this post#Sorry for any errors but I'm in a rambling rant mood lol
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An Well Made Excuse To Post My Specific Headcanons I've Had Since The Show Came Out
#bro fought his way thru those two only to burn the house down#anyway kdsjfsdf#that doodle and that comic werent actually made for eachother#i just wanted an excuse to post my oddly specific sleep headcanon lol#I like to think Uzi is so restless because shes always thinkin abt smth (whether that be stressful or not)#N sleeps like a rock and usually doesn't move; if its just him and Uzi he'll usually curl around her so she can't fall off the bed#V's had the habit since she was a worker#Tessa would always make excuses to have sleepovers w/ her fave drones#and it was usually J's problem of being cuddled to death by a sleeping V#nowadays the only way V gets peaceful sleep is the reassurance that Uzi or N are still there#hence the N dog plush in the comic dsklfjsldkfj#I have more headcanons of this variety (like for J) but i'll stop here#thanks for reading again! you guys really like to point out my tags and it makes me giggle everytime#anyway BYE :]#murder drones#serial designation n#serial designation v#uzi doorman#envuzi#enzi#violentbiscuitbites#< i seriously love that shipname btw. I love MD ship names#i love having been here so long I could tell you who made the og names everyone built off of. I think fandom is good sometimes (sometimes)
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Hello hello soo um im still workin on it ,ive been kinda burnt out from it an ik thers no real preshure and im wayyy past valintinse day but heres a wip of those silly lil valintines cards




Also today is my birth day im 22 now so .. Thats a thing. Anyway im planing on making like 3 alternet vershions of eclips 1 with the cannon tipical 2 arm pre decomishion desighn 1 with the 4 armed fannon /cannon design and 1 with the 4 armed ballone world desighn. Probly ganna take a bit but what ever it will be valintine in fuckin may who cares lol
#fnaf fanart#fnaf daycare attendant#fnaf moon#fnaf sun#moondrop#fnaf eclipse#I shoulda went to bed sooner i acctuly have plans today ill be fine witj an houer of sleep hopefully i dont ruin my own party by being a#The urge to so.e times .. Fuck im doin it agin#Insomneac#fuck im just waistin time i need to sleep but i could also stay up and just party rockers in the house to night my way threw#Im prett good at it but also my brain hit anouther developmental phase and o know ill probly sleep for 15 houers or more affter i finaly#Crash an i sapose to drink with my friend an have a lil party with them tonight#Fuck this is the most eventfull b day ive ever had hopefully i dont cry like i do every year idk why but i always cray on my birth day and#Cristmas#Lol why ru still reading this are you curious#Well hello there you silly fool im suprised anyone would make it down here like tbh i dont even think someone would even check the tags let#Alone read this far tbh im so confadent i think ill dox my self for fun#Are you redy im ganna do it#Get out a pen an paper okay#So here we go#I live in#Hahhahah bro why are u still fuckin here#I cant even spell oh shit fuck im a wizzerd now yah see that i turnd in to a spell casting wizzerd and youre just sitting there probly on#The toilet or a train or summin reading the tags on this nouthing burger of a post#Well any way its gettin late or early man idk its like 3:37 am and im tiyping this out#I gess were in the same bord borderline puthetic bote ?? Ship what ever fuck off i alredy said im a damb wizzerd in this hoe ?? That right#I said some fuckin who how whoe ? Like dude. Wtf anyyway fr fr i got milk thats been sitting on my night stand for maby an houer idk#I cant feel time anymore affter ... THE HORRORS#Anyway agin im acctuly ganna leave now have fun stay safe and uh thanks i gess for sticking arround have a lovely day and umm yah#crumble
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@bren-the-chicken you're the realest mf here
First of all, no need for canon compliance here. I love seeing people's takes, no matter how removed from canon. That's what fandom is, after all
LOVED reading all of these and they're all so incredibly based. The reason I came up with the poll is mainly because I've seen so many plausible options in so many different AUs that I couldn't possibly choose a favorite. Best thing about it? I don't have to!
Fidds knowing (nearly) nothing is sooo good for post-portal incident AUs (plus most fiddlestan hcs)
Fidds knowing about Stan is so great for fix-it fics in which he acts as the middle man.
Fidds finding out on his own via the photo or drunken/high confessions is PEAK (st)angst and college!Fiddauthor bonding (romantic or platonic)
Fidds being TIRED of hearing about Stan is just hilarious. He'd be sooo pissed. Great potential for crack fics. "Buddy if you don't shut your mouth I'll call your mother and get your brother here" "Hahaha yeah right, anyways Stan once—" Cue Fidds finding Stan and locking them up in their dorm until they make up
Thank you for the rant, I loved reading your ideas!
I'm curious on the general consensus because I think we don't have a canon answer for this
reblog for bigger sample size!
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You'll never guess who the kinda primary subject of this yappost/doodle dump is

sigh. it always comes back

Freaky ahh bowl of rice...what's he on about
"But Yōmakai isn't this a maddiman post. Why are the first two things besides the intro not ma" IM GETTING THERE. PATIENCE

I redraw Kagemura every now and then to see if I improve!! :) Think I kinda ate w this one frfr

No me mires con tus estupidos ojos

UEgh. judging you btw




Expression stuff cause I love seeing different depictions both from other people and within my own mind


Mini thing based on a. Trend jm noticing LMAO
Also this Maddiman that scared some of my friends apparently 😔💔





AU shenanigans and this idiot again. HATE HIM BLOW HIM UP NOW!!!! Jkjk i wish people drew him more i love him :)

Anyways all done :) see you!!
#ghuhdjdedjed I like him!!! He's neat#also other things too#like slightly unhinged#crossposting this to EspacioHola later cause I need to post more often there guhuhu'''#●posts from yomakai#□ yolo watch 2!#are any of my art posts ever not going to have that tag...#yokai watch#dr. maddiman#maddiman#babblong#rawry#Caspian Hernandez#Ebi#Ebi ykw#Wotchagot#By the way!! Is my posting style kinda ehhh for lack of a better word annoying?#Someone kinda subtly hinted at my stuff being rather wordy/lengthy the other day (well. not all that subtle) and If that's the case I can#Summarize!! Or something#Or save more doodly stuff for like s[acehey/pixiv or something lol#for now tho!! Here's Madds :)#thanks for looking at my art stuffs anyways it means a lot to me ^u^ !!!! I'm happy I get to make people happy with my arts#btw mid post yomakai but i can't figure out how to add multiple pictures so I'll come back and say if I save the rest for tomorrow :o)#nvm you can tell the exact moment in post I figured it out LOL#myeahhh still posting thr rest tomorrow tho cause I forgot to name my files befr#Temporarily back on phone phew#Wait why am i writing all this down??#Know what it's cause I'm a yapper. Sigh#Sometimes you shouldn't read tags cause. You are cursed wirh the knowledge of my digital inexperience
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The People Have Requested A Granby, and By Golly, A Granby They Shall Have!
#em draws stuff#em is posting about temeraire#temeraire#john granby#thank you eve + julia + cedar for making your opinions very known. More Granbies Soon as it took me An Hwhile to learn his face#he is Too Fancy but I am still figuring out how I think the aviators' uniforms work (and also was excited about being Able To Draw)#I can't decide whether or not keeping the tails on the coats would be useful or a hindrance aboard a dragon#altho' I shall probably opt for double-breasted coats in the working uniforms... hm maybe Design Sketches are in order#anyway Here's Granby having a rough day as per usual.#as for where I shall go next drawings-wise I am presently reading black powder war and tharkay has made his appearance#and I Did have to get up to bounce around excitedly. so perhaps we are due for a tharkay.
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it was me i follow you because aro flag in icon and youre a self proclaimed freak idr how i found u tho. also PLEASE info dump i’m so deeply curious
those are very good reasons to follow me ngl alkadsjflkd :3 BUT okay sorry for the barrage of text you've unleashed i have a lot of thoughts and feelings about this series putting it under a cut so i don't obliterate people's dashes lmao
i'm assuming based on your anon that you're somewhat familiar with the series but in case not (and because i love being annoying <3) the goes wrong show is a british comedy about a drama society who. well. cannot put on a play correctly for the fucking life of them lmao. as of writing this it's free on youtube and tubi (though tubi actually has the season one episodes in order, most places it ends up on don't for some reason?? this does not matter that much cuz there's very little continuity in this series anyway but as someone's who's very autistic about this series it does bother me lmao), and the two specials that come before the show chronologically, peter pan goes wrong and a christmas carol goes wrong in that order, are also on youtube for free :D
in addition to the series and the two specials there's also a christmas audio special you can find on the internet archive (the christmas that goes wrong, not to be confused with a christmas carol goes wrong lol), and the play that goes wrong, which was the original entry in this series/the first in what could loosely be referred to as a timeline (again, there's very little continuity here lol). there isn't a proshot of the play that goes wrong with the og cast as far as i'm aware BUT the script is available online for free and there are plenty of community theater productions available on youtube (and someone on here mayyy have a bootleg of it with the og cast but i'm too intimidated to ask about it lmao). most of these are pretty easy to find but i have links for most of them if anyone needs them!
anyway all that aside. chris.......chris bean the diieeeerectoooor.......my beloved little gay hater who sucks so much aklsjfkldskfljdas.............it's actually really funny to look back on my relationship to this series because when i first watched it my favorite was actually dennis (whom i still love to death don't get me wrong <3) and i didn't give a fuck about chris but as i watched the show more the tides started to change and now he's all i think about :') i think there's a couple reasons for this shift, the main ones being that my love for my blorbos get a bit uhhh violent (i ❤️ whump!) and i'd feel bad putting dennis through all that in a way i don't with chris lmao, and also because when i first watched the series i wasn't paying full attention so i hadn't realized how fucking actually tailor made this freak (affectionate) is for me adkljfsalkdfjKLSJLKF
AND TAILOR MADE FOR ME HE IS he's got mommy issues (the first time i watched the mother's day promo video i instantly lost my mind ghlkadsjf), he's got daddy issues (putting aside the implied emotional distance casting your dad as the villain in a play who's not only a traitor for the nazis but also preys on one of his subordinates is actually insane and i think about it so so much), and anger issues (his perfectionist onstage tantrum throwing ass ough). he also kinda disassociates onstage (the way he sometimes just. watches things go wrong with a blank expression. he's so unwell actually <3), and there's an in character tweet of him that implies disordered eating ("another hungry night" you'll always be famous)........he's got a lot of issues and all of them are designed to scratch My Brain Specifically glkajdsfkl. if characters don't have these issues i Give Them To Them but he just. already has them. gah 🥲💞
outside of all that there's also the fact that the minute he gets the chance to force his castmates to do it with him he puts on a ballet where he plays a caterpillar who "needs to rest" and becomes a beautiful "lord butterfly" and. well. there's so so much to unpack with that play in general but ballet and butterflies are two of my favorite aesthetics so this really was an attack on me lmao. even if his costume was kind of ugly there <3 listen i never said he had good style lmao that's what dressing up in little outfits in my head is for. though in speaking of style he's also always wearing the gayest theater kid scarfs offstage?? he's so cute and annoying and pretentious and i hate him 🥰🥰🥰
these are only a few things that make me feral about him there's a lot more i could ramble about if i wanted to keep us here all day galskdfsjdlf..........he really was the perfect storm to latch onto my psyche lmao. also lbr writer/actor henry shields who plays him in the show is just kinda pretty i do love my skinny brunette men 💗 (see also my recent crushes on adam scott and andrew garfield lmao)
i've been. extremely feral about him on main as you can tell ahlkdgjsaf. people just keep rewarding me for being insane so thank you everyone for that lmao :') also it's my new year's resolution to be more freaky and unhinged on main so i'm on that putting chris through some of the worst things possible grindset 💪but yeah i could ramble about this guy forever rn i love him so much and think he's really fun to chew on like a squeaky toy so galdfjkldf
#thank you to anyone who read all of this. i'm hashtag crazy#tbh i'm holding back from saying more cuz otherwise i'll be here forever and this'll never get published HGLKDJFK#i didn't even get to him being gay ace. some of the promos and the christmas carol goes wrong tries to convince me that he likes women#but i simply don't think that's true <3 i think that's a lie he tells himself due to internalized homophobia <3#i also didn't get to the fact that he's the first blorbo in a while i've been okay with killing in fics but that's another matter entirely#the cuteness aggression i get with him is CRAZY i wanna beat him up i wanna torture him. and then kiss his bloody forehead. ough#anyway yeah thank you for the ask and letting me ramble lmao i appreciate it <333 he's my silliest guy rn i can't shut up about him rn#the goes wrong show#chris bean#ask to tag#marshy gets asks#compnion#alsooooooo maybe you found me through my severance posts cuz of the new season? or i post about trans and aro issues sometimes too#though i've been trying to be less political on main cuz i have bad anger issues myself and it's too easy to work myself up aglkdsjafkl#trying to keep a balance between being politically aware and mentally stable y'know? :')#idk i'm a yapper (clearly lol) so i've been active in a handful of tags#tgws and chris has just been my main focus lately but i've been around agldkasjflask
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we’re back with wind breaker, 88-92 spoilers under the cut
-Sugishita going from happy to pissed as soon as he saw Sakura and co on the roof was hilarious, he was not about to handle that
-poor Nirei went through the ringer of emotions that whole conversation, my boy was streeesssed by the end
-Sakura being the one to have a clear head and resolve to do what they have too while everyone else is scared of of the shadows returning and dragging Furin back to its past, man I love it when things are set up and paid off
-ooogghh the visual language, the burnt wasteland when talking about what Endo does to those he beats (and how it looks similar to Takiishis inner world later on), the tree shadow when talking about Furins shadows, the slightly different art styles used for flashbacks, i fucking love art
-*looks at Takiishis pearls and leopard print jacket, looks at Nii-sensei saying Endo likes gyarus* yeah that checks out lol
_get you a friend like Nirei who will do your gacha dailies when your busy
-all of Sakuras friends working to get stronger so they can help him, uweeeee
-I love all the callbacks in 92, Anzai hanging out with Tsuchiya and Nagato again (did he get a haircut?), the girls Kiryu and Nirei helped showing back up (which made me notice all the young girl characters in the series have names ending in a) lol), Sakura/Suo/Kiryu all passing up the invitation to the wrestling restaurant again, Sakura smiling again, really love that with this upcoming arc bring a culmination of all the previous ones
-not Anzai bring the one to chew out Suo for completing Sakuras willingness to jump in head first to things when he’s the one who brought it up on the previous chapter lol
-s/o to that one kid in class 1-1 who had the fuzzy black hair, he seems fun I hope he gets a name at some point
-also I’m reading on mobile so no pics but that one Ume panel in 90 where he’s leaning down so his elbow is going into the next panel? Chefs kiss I love that shit
#wind breaker#Cera reads wind breaker#A lot to say this time despite this being like 3 straight chapters of talking lol#This is where me jumping ahead is starting to pay off because I’m connecting things said here to things that happen later in the arc#Love doing that lol#Would have read a little more but 93 is the start of the Ume backstory arc and I wanna read that all at once#(Also wow they’re dropping you straight into it huh!! That had to have been jarring for people reading weekly)#Anyways new chapter tomorrow who’s excited!!!!!#Also thank you to everyone who’s reading my posts!! I didn’t expect people to be interested in my ramblings so that makes me happy
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i live a life of a rapunzel, but i look like her evil mother
i can't tell you how "nice" it is to live in a little room every day of your young adult life. i spend my mornings lying dormant on my bed. my eyes glued to the white ceilings covered with cobwebs. i listen to the crunching of cheese crackers and slurping of coffee in the hall room. it's the sound of love i've never been included in. when i finally muster up the courage to abandon my bed, it's already past noon. as i let spotify play in the background, i occupy myself with the tasks of daily chores. these tasks can bring immense joy if it's done right. if not, it can be burdensome. my mind often wanders to lands far away from reality while i'm engaged in these activities. i imagine myself living in a lovely home doing everything i've ever dreamed of. i'm free to sing as loud as i want to, i'm free to cook and eat whatever i like to, i'm free to wear satin, silk and georgette dresses and dance to my favourite songs every night. there's no one to tell me what i've to do anymore. i can visit art galleries, museums, cafes and libraries on weekends. spend my evenings on the beach enjoying the sunset views. wake up early in the morning and go for a jog. frame the mundane beauties i've captured and hang them on the wall. intertwine my soul with someone and fall in love so deeply, i can tell my generation that true love still exists. all i've ever asked from the universe is to be liberated. when will the time arrive for me to leave my nest? i'm twenty-two, and i'm tired of my life getting consumed in a little room. "it's time for lunch, sona." i'm pulled back from my daydreams to my dull reality. a mother is always in her daughter's way.
#thoughts#i don't know what else to call this#it's not poetry or anything; just words put together to mean something#my thoughts are tangled like my curly hair and i'm trying to untangle them here on tumblr#if you took the time to read it; thank you very much#and if you'd like to read more of my stuff; do let me know and i'll post them here#otherwise they'll be kept hidden in my notebook for the time being#uh anyway thank you so much#have a great day angels love you <3#save#images are from pinterest#zera's writings
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more rejuv things but its. its just this guy again, im sorry shes all i can draw
#everyday im like i wanna draw :] and then i just end up with this thing on the page#i refuse to draw hands holding. because i cannot and im too lazy to figure it out#oh yea a couple of these i havent posted before because theyre lame to me but ill put them here for now#anyways!!#i was gonna say something about a couple of these but i forgot#oh well#pokemon rejuvenation#does she. lose her ribbon in blacksteeple. i forgot#she still has it to me..#to me her c15 hair tie is a torn part of the ribbon#anyways again. yesterday i finally figured out what the rejuvrp is. very cool stuff im so incredibly intrigued by it#i have no idea whats going on! but it looks so cool ill try to read it more later.#oh right again about the rejuvrp thing. the character designs ive seen are so so so cool i want to draw them so bad#i think i have to ask about that first though and there is! no way i am going to do that!!! i do not want to bother them#and i think my heart would explode from the fear of it all before i even typed the message.#that and im very lazy! theres a very good chance i wouldnt even draw it in the first place#anyways unrelated but i think if i get another comment from someone on something i Will Actually Explode.#i see someone said something and it kills me on the daily. what is happening... thank you.. i appreciate it very much...#sorry to whoever read all of that. um. hi youre really cool and i hope you have a good day/night#i think being on twitter has done something to me i have to leave it immediately. anyways back to twitter#wait actually i should go back to playing rejuv. im still in the grove from when i first posted the gym leader melia au. im afraid to leave#also play pokemon rejuvenation no i will not stop saying that everytime i post one of these
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