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ucflibrary · 4 years

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Women’s History Month began as a week-long celebration in Sonoma, California in 1978 which was centered around International Women’s Day on March 8. A year later during a women’s history conference at Sarah Lawrence College, participants learned how successful the week was and decided to initiate similar in their own areas. President Carter issued the first proclamation for a national Women’s History Week in 1980. In 1987, Congress (after being petitioned by the National Women’s History Project) passed Pub. L. 100-9 designating March as Women’s History Month. U.S. Presidents have issued proclamations on Women’s History Month since 1988.

The Libraries will be hosting two virtual events to celebrate Women’s History Month for 2021. The first is a talk by Nicholson School of Communication faculty member, Dr. Kimberly Voss, called “Make No Mistake, Florida is Crucial”: Sen. Lori Wilson and the Equal Rights Amendment, which discusses efforts to ratify the ERA in Florida. The second is a panel discussion called Women & Academia in the Time of COVID where five UCF faculty and administrators will discuss the impact of the COVID pandemic and remote learning on their teaching, scholarship, service loads and personal lives. Both events are free and open to the public. Click on the links to register to attend.

We have created a list of books about women, both history and fiction, suggested by staff. Please click on the read more link below to see the full book list with descriptions and catalog links. And don’t forget to stop by the John C. Hitt Library to browse the featured bookshelf on the main floor near the Research & Information Desk for additional Women’s History Month books.

A Girl of the Limberlost by Gene Stratton Porter Elnora Comstock grows up on the banks of Limberlost Swamp in Indiana with her bitter mother, Katharine. Unable to afford an education, Elnora develops a plan to sell artifacts and moths from the swamp. Suggested by Pat Tiberii, Interlibrary Loan and Document Delivery Services

A Woman of No Importance: the untold story of the American spy who helped win World War II by Sonia Purnell Based on new and extensive research, Sonia Purnell has for the first time uncovered the full secret life of Virginia Hall--an astounding and inspiring story of heroism, spycraft, resistance, and personal triumph over shocking adversity. It is the breathtaking story of how one woman's fierce persistence helped win the war. Suggested by Dawn Tripp, Research & Information Services

All the Horrors of War: a Jewish girl, a British doctor, and the liberation of Bergen-Belsen by Bernice Lerner Drawing on a wealth of sources, including Hughes's papers, war diaries, oral histories, and interviews, this gripping volume combines scholarly research with narrative storytelling in describing the suffering of Nazi victims, the overwhelming presence of death at Bergen-Belsen, and characters who exemplify the human capacity for fortitude. Lerner, Rachel's daughter, has special insight into the torment her mother suffered. The first book to pair the story of a Holocaust victim with that of a liberator, it compels readers to consider the full, complex humanity of both. Suggested by Katie Kirwan, Acquisitions & Collections

Data Feminism by Catherine D'Ignazio and Lauren F. Klein This book offers strategies for data scientists seeking to learn how feminism can help them work toward justice, and for feminists who want to focus their efforts on the growing field of data science. But it is about much more than gender. It is about power, about who has it and who doesn't, and about how those differentials of power can be challenged and changed. Suggested by Sandy Avila, Research & Information Services

Field o' My Dreams: the poetry of Gene Stratton-Porter compiled and edited by Mary DeJong Obuchowski In her introduction to Porter’s work, Obuchowski argues that the natural and spiritual themes of Porter’s poetry mirror the self-same concerns regarding nature and social issues found in her fiction and nonfiction. Reflecting and in some cases reacting against, current social attitudes at a time of political and demographic change, she was in demand as a columnist for popular magazines and a widely read fiction writer. Porter wielded considerable influence over her reading public, and in that role she acted as a reformer, particularly regarding the environment but also on behalf of women, children, and education. Suggested by Pat Tiberii, Interlibrary Loan and Document Delivery Services

Finish the Fight!: the brave and revolutionary women who fought for the right to vote written by the Staff of The New York Times Who was at the forefront of women's right to vote? We know a few famous names, like Susan B. Anthony and Elizabeth Cady Stanton, but what about so many others from diverse backgrounds—black, Asian, Latinx, Native American, and more—who helped lead the fight for suffrage? On the hundredth anniversary of the historic win for women's rights, it's time to celebrate the names and stories of the women whose stories have yet to be told. Suggested by Sandy Avila, Research & Information Services

Founding Sisters and the Nineteenth Amendment by Eleanor Clift In this riveting account, political analyst Eleanor Clift chronicles the many thrilling twists and turns of the suffrage struggle and shows how the issues and arguments that surrounded the movement still reverberate today. Beginning with the Seneca Falls Woman’s Rights Convention of 1848, Clift introduces the movement’s leaders, recounts the marches and demonstrations, and profiles the opposition–antisuffragists, both men and women, who would do anything to stop women from getting the vote. Suggested by Richard Harrison, Research & Information Services

Free Food for Millionaires by Min Jin Lee Casey Han's four years at Princeton gave her many things, "But no job and a number of bad habits." Casey's parents, who live in Queens, are Korean immigrants working in a dry cleaner, desperately trying to hold on to their culture and their identity. Their daughter, on the other hand, has entered into rarified American society via scholarships. But after graduation, Casey sees the reality of having expensive habits without the means to sustain them. As she navigates Manhattan, we see her life and the lives around her, culminating in a portrait of New York City and its world of haves and have-nots. This fresh exploration of the complex layers we inhabit both in society and within ourselves. Suggested by Sara Duff, Acquisitions & Collections

From Equal Suffrage to Equal Rights: Alice Paul and the National Woman's Party, 1910-1928 by Christine A. Lunardini The woman's movements and work in American history during the second two decades, was dramatic. It dealt with the past, with pageants and politics; with different organizations and with conflict from within. It took on the Democrats, founded a National Woman's Party; it waged a home front war. It dealt with prison, and resolution. It went from equal suffrage to equal rights. Suggested by Richard Harrison, Research & Information Services

Indelicacy by Amina Cain A cleaning woman at a museum of art nurtures aspirations to do more than simply dust the paintings around her. She dreams of having the liberty to explore them in writing, and so must find a way to win herself the time and security to use her mind. She escapes her lot by marrying a rich man, but having gained a husband, a house, high society, and a maid, she finds that her new life of privilege is no less constrained. Not only has she taken up different forms of time-consuming labor - social and erotic - but she is now, however passively, forcing other women to clean up after her. Perhaps another and more drastic solution is necessary? Suggested by Sara Duff, Acquisitions & Collections

See Jane Win: the inspiring story of the women changing American politics by Caitlin Moscatello After November 8, 2016, first came the sadness; then came the rage, the activism, and the protests; and, finally, for thousands of women, the next step was to run for office—many of them for the first time. More women campaigned for local or national office in the 2018 election cycle than at any other time in US history, challenging accepted notions about who seeks power and who gets it. Journalist Caitlin Moscatello reported on this wave of female candidates for New York magazine's The Cut, Glamour, and Elle. In this book, she further documents this pivotal time in women's history. Closely following four candidates throughout the entire process, from the decision to run through Election Day, readers are taken inside their exciting, winning campaigns and the sometimes thrilling, sometimes brutal realities of running for office while female. Suggested by Megan Haught, Student Learning & Engagement/Research & Information Services

Taking on the Trust: the epic battle of Ida Tarbell and John D. Rockefeller by Steve Weinberg Long before the rise of mega-corporations like Wal-Mart and Microsoft, Standard Oil controlled the oil industry with a monopolistic force unprecedented in American business history. Undaunted by the ruthless power of its owner, John D. Rockefeller, a fearless and ambitious reporter named Ida Minerva Tarbell confronted the company known simply as “The Trust.” Through her peerless fact gathering and devastating prose, Tarbell, a muckraking reporter at McClure’s magazine, pioneered the new practice of investigative journalism. Her shocking discoveries about Standard Oil and Rockefeller led, inexorably, to a dramatic confrontation during the opening decade of the twentieth century that culminated in the landmark 1911 Supreme Court antitrust decision breaking up the monopolies and forever altering the landscape of modern American industry. Suggested by Dawn Tripp, Research & Information Services

The Book of Gutsy Women: favorite stories of courage and resilience by Hillary Rodham Clinton and Chelsea Clinton Hillary Rodham Clinton and her daughter, Chelsea, share the stories of the gutsy women who have inspired them—women with the courage to stand up to the status quo, ask hard questions, and get the job done. Ensuring the rights and opportunities of women and girls remains a big piece of the unfinished business of the twenty-first century. While there's a lot of work to do, we know that throughout history and around the globe women have overcome the toughest resistance imaginable to win victories that have made progress possible for all of us. That is the achievement of each of the women in this book. To us, they are all gutsy women -- leaders with the courage to stand up to the status quo, ask hard questions, and get the job done. So in the moments when the long haul seems awfully long, we hope you will draw strength from these stories. Because if history shows one thing, it's that the world needs gutsy women. Suggested by Richard Harrison, Research & Information Services

The Good Fight by Shirley Chisholm Chisholm describes being the first woman, and first black woman, to run for President, and how politicians operate. She writes about her relationships with black political leaders Walter Fauntroy, Louis Stokes, Ron Dellums, and Julian Bond. She gives her views on what direction black politics should take in the years to come. Suggested by Megan Haught, Student Learning & Engagement/Research & Information Services

Unapologetic: a Black, queer, and feminist mandate for radical movements by Charlene A. Carruthers Drawing on Black intellectual and grassroots organizing traditions, including the Haitian Revolution, the US civil rights movement, and LGBTQ rights and feminist movements, Carruthers challenges all of us engaged in the social justice struggle to make the movement for Black liberation more radical, more queer, and more feminist. She offers a flexible model of what deeply effective organizing can be, anchored in the Chicago model of activism, which features long-term commitment, cultural sensitivity, creative strategizing, and multiple cross-group alliances. Suggested by Megan Haught, Student Learning & Engagement/Research & Information Services

Unmarriageable by Soniah Kamal In this retelling of Pride and Prejudice set in modern-day Pakistan, Alys Binat has sworn never to marry--until an encounter with one Mr. Darsee at a wedding makes her reconsider. A scandal and vicious rumor in the Binat family have destroyed their fortune and prospects for desirable marriages, but Alys, the second and most practical of the five Binat daughters, has found happiness teaching English literature to schoolgirls. Knowing that many of her students won't make it to graduation before dropping out to marry and start having children, Alys teaches them about Jane Austen and her other literary heroes and hopes to inspire them to dream of more. Suggested by Sara Duff, Acquisitions & Collections

#ucflibrary #featured bookshelf #women's history month #booklr #reading list #tumblarians

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mgppaintingservice · 2 months

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How Long Should You Wait After Washing Walls for Painting?

Are you planning to give your walls a fresh coat of paint? Before you start, it's essential to properly prepare your walls for painting to ensure a smooth and durable finish. But how long should you wait after washing walls before painting? This is a common question we receive at MGP Painting.

The drying time can significantly impact the quality of your paint job, influencing how well the paint adheres to the surface and how it looks after drying. Understanding the factors that affect drying time and following best practices can make a big difference in the final result of your painting project.

Why Do You Need to Wash Walls Before Painting?

Properly washing your walls before painting is an essential step in achieving a professional and long-lasting finish. Over time, walls accumulate dust, dirt, grease, and even old paint residues, all of which can affect the adhesion and appearance of new paint.

Here are the main reasons why washing walls is a crucial pre-painting step:

Removing Dirt, Grime, and Old Paint

Walls can gather a lot of surface contaminants, including dirt, grime, and old paint flakes. If these are not removed before painting, they can cause the new paint to peel or blister, leading to an uneven and unattractive finish.

Ensuring a Smooth and Even Paint Application

Cleaning the walls helps to create a smooth surface, which is essential for an even coat of paint. Any remaining debris or residue can create bumps and imperfections that are noticeable after the paint dries.

Improving Paint Adhesion and Durability

A clean surface ensures that the paint adheres properly to the wall. This improves the durability and longevity of the paint job, helping to prevent issues like peeling and chipping. Proper adhesion is especially important in high-traffic areas or on walls that are frequently touched.

Factors Affecting Drying Time

The drying time after washing your walls can vary based on several factors. Understanding these can help you determine the optimal time to wait before starting your paint job.

Type of Cleaner Used

Soap and Water: Using a mild soap and water solution is common for cleaning walls. However, soap can leave a residue that needs to be thoroughly rinsed off and allowed to dry, which can extend drying time.

Specialized Cleaning Products: Products designed specifically for pre-paint cleaning often dry faster than soap and water. They also tend to leave less residue, which can speed up the drying process.

Environmental Conditions

Humidity Levels: High humidity can significantly slow down the drying process. In contrast, low humidity levels help walls dry faster.

Temperature: Warmer temperatures generally accelerate drying, while cooler temperatures can slow it down. Maintaining a warm, well-ventilated environment can help speed up the process.

Wall Material

Drywall: Drywall typically dries relatively quickly, especially if only lightly cleaned with a damp cloth.

Plaster: Plaster walls can absorb more moisture and may take longer to dry compared to drywall.

Concrete: Concrete walls can also hold moisture longer, requiring more time to dry thoroughly.

If you're uncertain about the drying time or need expert advice, contact MGP Painting for a professional recommendation and assistance with your painting project.

Tips for Faster Drying

If you're eager to start painting but want to ensure your walls are properly dry, there are several strategies you can employ to speed up the drying process. Here are some effective tips to help your walls dry faster:

Increasing Ventilation

Open Windows and Doors: Allowing fresh air to circulate through the room can help moisture evaporate more quickly. Open windows and doors to create a cross-breeze that enhances airflow.

Use Fans: Place fans around the room to direct airflow onto the walls. Oscillating fans can cover a larger area and speed up the drying process.

Using Fans or Dehumidifiers

Fans: In addition to increasing ventilation, fans can be strategically placed to target particularly damp areas. Box fans and oscillating fans are especially effective.

Dehumidifiers: High humidity levels can slow down drying. Using a dehumidifier in the room can reduce humidity and accelerate drying by removing excess moisture from the air.

Timing Your Painting Project to Coincide with Dry Weather

Check the Weather Forecast: Plan your cleaning and painting projects during a period of dry weather. High humidity and rainy conditions can extend drying times.

Work in Warm, Dry Conditions: Warm temperatures help moisture evaporate faster. If possible, adjust your project schedule to take advantage of warmer days.

For more detailed tips and to understand the importance of proper drying times before painting, read our full blog.

Potential Issues of Painting Too Soon

Painting over walls that haven't fully dried can lead to various problems that affect the quality and durability of your paint job. It's crucial to allow sufficient drying time to avoid these potential issues:

Peeling or Bubbling Paint

Insufficient drying time can trap moisture beneath the paint surface. This trapped moisture can cause the paint to bubble or peel away from the wall over time, resulting in an uneven and unsightly finish.

Uneven Finish

Wet walls can affect how paint adheres and dries, leading to an uneven appearance once the paint sets. This can create visible streaks or patches that detract from the overall aesthetic of the room.

Reduced Paint Adhesion and Longevity

Properly dried walls provide a stable surface for paint adhesion. Painting too soon can compromise this adhesion, causing the paint to wear away more quickly and requiring premature repainting.

Conclusion

Properly preparing your walls before painting by allowing adequate drying time is crucial for achieving a flawless and long-lasting finish. By following recommended drying times, checking for dryness with simple tests, and employing strategies to speed up drying, you can ensure that your paint adheres smoothly and evenly. Trust MGP Painting for professional advice tailored to your painting project needs.

#house painters #painters in rockland county ny #mgp painting #house painters in rockland county #painting company westchester #rockland painters #rockland county painters #westchester painters #painting contractors in bergen county nj #painter rockland county

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evie568 · 3 years

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Work in progress

♫ ♪ Spotify playlist : Ella changed the Name — Previously named : Cut ; by eviewivi

Date of creation : December 2017 — 3h6m

Let’s start from the beginning.

— —

· Who am I?

My name is Evie.

It was not my given name. I chose it myself. I always wanted a long name, like “Isabella” or “Elisabeth”, but I was given Eve. So I decided to add another letter to it to make it longer (age 4/5).

Some of my diplomas say “Evie”, and others say “Eve”. My passport says “Eve” whereas my social insurance card says “Evie”.

It’s a bit of a mess.

— —

I was born in 1995, in London and moved to the South of France with my family (age 8).

My parents are both English (although they enjoy saying they’re French since they have duel nationality now). I have 2 older sisters and 1 older brother.

At the age of 8, I remember that I could count up to 30 in French and say “Bonjour”. That was about it. I was put in a French school straight away and it was scary at first.

— —

Learning to speak French came naturally as I was young. The grammar was a little harder, and I still have difficulty with it today.

I actually have difficulty in English too. I often make mistakes.

Being born in one country and moving to another can sometimes be confusing.

“Are you French?” Not really…

“English?” Neither…

“So what are you?” Good question.

You often get asked the same questions.

“Do you think in English or French?”

“Do you dream in English or French?”

“Do you prefer England or France?”

I don’t mind it though, they find it interesting.

— —

· What happed?

This is a difficult question. I’m not too sure as I am still discovering things everyday.

I am not writing this, cured from my mental illness. I am writing this, still going through tough times, trying to get better everyday.

I am writing this as a sort of therapy, to help myself and maybe others.

To understand myself better, for family and friends to understand me better and maybe for people to relate to.

Writing has never been my strong point but whether you are good at it or not, I do find it helps. You get to express yourself freely, like dancing, or painting or creating music… any form of art really.

— —

So back to the question : what happened?

In 2018, I was diagnosed with a mental illness I had never heard of before in my life : Borderline Personality Disorder.

— —

· How did this all start?

After finishing a Sound Engineering course back in 2015 (Montpellier, FR), I went back home to my parents house to look for a job in the music industry.

It was very hard to find a job with no work experience at all. It was a catch 22 situation : I needed a job to gain experience but couldn’t get a job without any prior experience.

I would end up playing The Sims everyday in my one piece pajamas. Drinking Desperados in the evening while dreaming of moving to Sydney.

My parents quickly noticed I was not being very productive, and gave me a speech.

I would often check Facebook and see my best friend at the time, having the time of her life as an Au Pair in London.

I was jealous.

— —

In October 2015, I took a plane to London to become an Au Pair.

I was an Au Pair for about 2 years in London, and it was so much fun.

I made friends with other Au Pairs from all over the world that were so lovely. We would go out to bars, concerts, parks, museums, festivals and so much more.

— —

Then I met Julien.

This part is difficult to write about as it is still very painful and I have forgotten a lot.

My therapist told me it’s hard to remember what hurt you so much. I find that to be true in this situation, but I’ll try my best.

— —

I’ve never had a boyfriend in my life. And I was 22 years old.

My brother created an online profile for me on a website called OKCupid. He told me that it wasn’t just for dating, but you could also make friends.

I met Julien on OKCupid. His username was “JulienB26” (his last name started with a B and he was 26… I know, very creative…). Mine was “BurnTogether” (the name of a music album I was OBSESSED with at the time)

He was not my type at all, but sent me the sweetest, most personal message I had ever received, so I thought “why not?”

We met in a rock bar in Camden Town called The Worlds End, and it was fun. We got on straight away and it was my best first date ever.

Long story short we ended up dating.

After only about a month, I left my Au Pair family and moved in with him in Notting Hill. He met my family and I met his.

My parents adored him! He seemed so perfect. He was cultured, dressed nicely, polite, had a good job, a nice and tidy apartment…

He wasn’t that perfect though.

— —

He smoked a lot of weed, was addicted to online video games and extremely jealous.

I remember one time when I was typing to my friend at the time, he snatched my phone out of my hands to see what I was writing. It was quite aggressive and I did not like it at all.

— —

My Au Pair friend Pri invited me one day to spend time with her and our new Au Pair friend to go out to pubs near London Bridge.

I refused, as Julien didn’t want me to go. He didn’t like Pri.

We (Julien and I) went to the rock bar we first met at instead. It was not fun. We didn’t have much left in common.

I felt the relationship slowly dying and there was a lot about him I did not like anymore. But breaking up with him was not an option.

I got drunk. I often drank. I liked it so much and would drink too much, too often.

The following day I saw about 5 to 10 messages from my friend Pri.

There was a terrorist attack that very same night at London Bridge.

She managed to escape but unfortunately our Au Pair friend, did not.

— —

Pri asked me to spend the day with her, the day we found out that our friend had passed away and, of course, I went.

We drank wine together and cried.

She didn’t want to spend the night alone and asked me if I could stay with her.

I agreed and asked Julien if it was okay with him. But it was not.

It was a problem for him and he refused.

I left.

— —

Julien had been acting strange for a couple of days.

I didn’t really know what to do and didn’t want to be egocentric and assume it was because of me, but I did.

Maybe he was thinking about his father who passed away?

I didn’t know, and he wasn’t telling me anything.

— —

One day, as I came home from babysitting, and had enough. I needed to know what was wrong.

He put down his joint, told his online friends on Discord that he needed to leave and turned around from his computer to face me.

— —

This part is very hard to remember.

He told me I didn’t deserve his love as he couldn’t love me to the fullest.

He wasn’t sure whether or not he wanted to end things and needed some time to think.

Our age difference was a problem for him. He thought we were in two different phases of our life.

— —

I didn’t sleep that night.

I watched Netflix and cried until I saw the sun rise.

The next following days were difficult. It was the same pattern everyday.

I woke up sad, left for work angry, came back confused and went to sleep sad.

I didn’t deserve this.

No one deserves being with someone who isn’t sure they love them and needs time to think.

So I decided to leave.

I took a train to Paris and never came back.

— —

My brother who studied art in Paris, decided to spend a year of his education in Bergen, Norway. So he had an un-used flat in Paris for a year.

I asked my parents if I could stay in the flat while looking for a job in Paris.

They agreed.

— —

I felt fresh, like a new chapter of my life was starting. I didn’t know anyone (besides my brothers friends, Julie and Yolo).

I bought healthy, organic, vegan food and bought a membership to a gym that I would go to everyday for an hour.

Things were looking good. I felt positive.

— —

I quickly found a part-time job as a receptionist for a company involved in cryptocurrency.

It was so much fun.

I loved saying hello to all the staff that walked passed my desk in the morning.

My life was good, and it got even better.

— —

I went to the company’s seminar in a grand chateau outside of Paris.

One evening, we had special places to sit for dinner. It was a way of mixing all different employees from different services to connect.

I was sat at a table with one of the Vice Presidents of the company.

He was very kind and asked me what I do outside of work and what I would like to do in the future.

I had a couple of Desperados and told him that I originally wanted to join a company in the music industry and work my way up, but since working for the company, I had fallen in love with the it and would actually like to work my way up in this company.

This was not a sneaky plan or anything. I’m not that smart.

Fortunately though, the President of the company heard my tipsy conversation and called me over.

He asked me if what I said was true. I was astonished he knew my name!

— —

About two weeks after the seminar, the Vice President of Sales approached me asking if we could have a chat.

He had heard from the President that I wanted to join the company and offered me a position in the Sales department.

I had no experience whatsoever in sales, but accepted with great pleasure.

— —

My personal life on the other hand was not going so well.

I was drinking a lot and started cutting myself with broken glass as a punishment for drinking.

But I didn’t tell anyone or do anything about it as I felt in control of the situation.

I was on OKCupid again but comparing every profile to Julien.

In the spring of whatever year it was (2018 maybe?), I went back to London to see Julien as he had some of my belongings to give back to me.

We talked and walked in Hyde Park for about two hours. I wore his favorite dress.

I told him about my amazing new job and friends I had made. I was subtly bragging about my life. I wanted him to regret letting me go. And he did. He cried so much and felt very regretful. I felt happy even though I was suffering inside.

Towards the end of the walk he told me he was seeing someone new.

I did not expect that. I was shocked.

— —

I remember taking the underground back, and crying like I have never cried before while listening to Taylor Swift.

I felt that something inside of me had changed. Something bad.

— —

After returning back to Paris things got worse. I was drinking more and cutting deeper and more often.

Julien was still texting me at the time and I was not responding as I wanted to cut the cord with him.

He didn’t understand why and I remember telling him that I had never felt this bad in my life. I had never hated myself so much and needed space.

He told me that I needed to seek professional help.

I said goodbye and blocked him.

— —

On the day of Gay Pride 2018 in Paris.

I was drinking alone.

I didn’t eat anything that day and drank a bottle of white wine alone in my flat.

I remember grabbing a glass and smashing it on the floor, collecting the sharpest piece of glass I could find and cutting and cutting and cutting.

My friend Yolo came over and saw the pieces if glass all over the kitchen floor and saw me on the floor crying and bleeding.

She called an Uber and took me to a psychiatric hospital.

I was so desperate for help that I would have gone anywhere she took me.

We had to stop the Uber half way there so I could throw up and then continue on our route.

— —

Once there I remember talking to a professional, crying, about suicidal thoughts I had.

I remember doing a lot of research at the time and discovered a website.

It had all the information I was looking for on it.

I spent a night at the hospital Saint Anne to sober up.

The following day, they let me go.

— —

Even though things were bad, I still felt 100% in control of the situation.

I would self harm and drink almost daily.

I continued doing research about suicide and the sharpest object known to man.

One day I decided to order a pack of scalpels off of Amazon. They arrived quickly.

I was so eager to try them but had to go to work that day. So I just did a small cut on my arm and wow.

I didn’t press hard at all but bled. It was so satisfying at the time.

— —

On my friend Julie’s birthday I remember coming home from work, going to the closest shop to my flat and buying two 50cl cans of Desperados. I could tell the cashier was judging me, but I did not care much.

I put on a stand up comedy show on Netflix and proceeded to drink the beer.

Then I remembered the scalpels in my bedside draw.

I had promised myself not to self-harm anymore before the summer holidays as I would be around my family in t-shirts and shorts.

But I wanted to so badly. So I did.

I said to myself that it would be just one cut on my thigh. But it had to be satisfying enough.

So I cut my thigh.

— —

I forgot that it was a scalpel and in my mind it was just a piece of broken glass.

Big mistake.

I cut too deep.

I remember seeing the white fat through the cut in my thigh.

It didn’t hurt though.

Then the blood started to flow. There was so much.

I tried to close the cut with my hands, but blood got everywhere.

I panicked.

I didn’t want to disturbed Julie on her birthday so I phoned her boyfriend (who was also my work colleague).

He calmed me down and phoned the emergencies who arrived very quickly.

— —

I went to the hospital and had to have ten stitches in my thigh.

They also made me speak to a therapist there who told me I could go home.

So I went home.

— —

I was seeing a psychiatrist for a while (since the Gay Pride event)

That told me after the 10 stitches incident that I was depressed.

I still remember the feeling of her telling me I was depressed. I was shocked and didn’t want to believe her.

I had everything under control!

She suggested I take antidepressants and I accepted. Paroxetine 10mg

— —

I worked for the company for about a year.

It was amazing.

I traveled to Berlin and London. I also attended a “Blockchain Cruise” from Barcelona to Monaco to Ibiza.

I could bring whomever I wanted from the company.

I chose Jacques.

He seemed nice.

— —

On the cruise, there was a party going on and of course, we both attended it. I was a little bit tipsy and kissed a guy on the dance floor.

I remember seeing Jacques really angry and went over to talk to him.

We were talking near the main bar on the boat.

He seemed very drunk.

He tried to kiss me but I pushed him away.

He tried again and I had to push harder.

Someone felt the need to intervene and asked me if I needed help.

I told them that everything was okay and walked Jacques back to the room.

— —

After the trip I wanted to forget that side I saw of Jacques.

So I did.

I wanted to be his friend and he wanted to be mine.

— —

One evening we were having drinks with work colleagues in a whiskey bar.

I asked Jacques, as a friend, if he wanted to spend the night at my flat.

I felt very lonely and was a bit tipsy.

I didn’t want anything to happen between us, but I understand now how he thought differently.

— —

As we were going to bed, he tried again, like on the cruise to kiss me.

I pushed him away but he was stronger.

He then proceeded to take my pajama trousers off.

I pulled them back up. He pulled them back down.

I remember his fingers inside of me. I tried pushing him off of me but he grabbed my wrists.

He then, finally, saw that I was not happy.

So thankfully, he stopped.

I pulled my trousers back up and stayed in a foetus position until I fell asleep.

— —

The next morning we walked to work together.

I didn’t feel right. Something about that night felt wrong.

I phoned Julie and told her what had happened. She was in Greece at the time.

I sent an email to my boss telling him that I didn’t feel well and asking him if I could have the day off.

He accepted and I left with my friend Yolo who met me at work.

— —

We had a lovely day. We went to the cinema, went and got massages, and later on that evening, we were at a café and my friend Julie appeared out of nowhere!

She had taken an early plane back from Greece to come and see me.

I was so happy to see her!

— —

The next week, at the end of the day at work, round 7pm, my boss asked if he could talk to me.

He told me that the President of the company had heard that I slept with a married colleague.

This has never happened and I has shocked and embarrassed.

I told him this information was not true and he believed me.

He told me to tell him if anything ever happens between me and a colleague.

I felt the need to tell him that Jacques took advantage to me. And I did.

My voice was shacking. He was angry.

After our chat, I left and went home.

— —

I don’t remember this part very well but I remember going to see my therapist very drunk with a bottle in my hand to my appointment.

She called the emergencies and they took me to a psychiatric hospital, La Maison Blanche.

— —

It was very strange at first seeing all different kinds of patients, with all different mental illnesses.

(the person is drinking water from a puddle, not praying)

— —

I stayed for about 15 days there and made some friends.

It wasn’t as bad as it first seemed.

— —

My siblings were aware of what was going on with me. But once again, I still felt under control of what was happening.

They didn’t think so, and they were right to think that.

One day I ran away of the hospital and drank cans of beer in the side walk.

That is when my siblings decided to tell my parents what was going on.

After going back inside the hospital, one of the nurses told me that my mother was on her way to see me, she took a 4h train to come.

She had no idea what was going on before. It must have been a terrible shock for her.

I felt so scared and embarrassed for her to see me in this blue outfit they had given me but they refused to give me back my clothes.

— —

It was extremely difficult to balance my work and personal mental health.

I was coming to terms with my depression and accepting that I was, in fact, never in control of anything that was happening to me.

— —

After leaving the hospital, I went back to work.

It was very awkward at first.

The President of the company asked to speak with me about my long absence.

I didn’t want to go into details, so I just mentioned that I was at the hospital without saying why, or what kind of hospital…

Later that same day, someone from human resources also asked to speak to me.

She was asking is everything was okay and I told her what my therapist had told me to say, that I had a really sore throat.

Now looking back at it, I know that she knew exactly where I was. In a psychiatric hospital.

The papers the hospital were giving to my company to cover my absence, had the address on them.

So she knew…

— —

One day, my boss got fired out of the blue. He was such an amazing person and work colleague. He didn’t deserve this.

Later that month, my other Sales colleague, also got fired.

Cryptocurrency was not doing as well as it was before, and the company was slowly dying.

I was next to get fired.

It was the day before my birthday.

I remember my new, less cool boss, asked me to have a word with him and a person from HR.

I honestly thought at the time that I was getting a raise. Lol.

The conversation was very awkward, it lasted about 15 minutes. I don’t remember much of what was said.

They told me to leave straight away and not mention to anyone that I got fired.

I told my friend/colleague on Slack before leaving the building.

He was worried he was next to get fired.

So I sent him a brief message saying “turns out you were right about the Sales team getting fired. I have to leave now. Please don’t tell anyone.”

I left and went home.

— —

As I got home I lay on the sofa staring into oblivion.

I wanted to cry. I said to myself that this is a situation most people would cry.

But it was so hard to shed a tear.

I felt numb.

— —

I phoned my mother and told her what had happened. She was worried I would do something bad.

I invited my friend, Alienor, that I made from the hospital over, and we drank beer and took cocaine.

My father phoned me.

He could hear by my voice that I had drank.

My parents contacted Yolo to come pick me up and take me back to the hospital by Uber.

I felt obliged to go with her, so I went and Alienor left.

I only stayed one night or maybe two. I don’t really remember.

— —

I continued living in Paris for a couple of months, without a job.

I would drink everyday. Cans of Heineken beer.

I would wake up and drink straight away, while watching BoJack Horseman.

Then I would fall asleep around 6pm.

Everyday was the same pattern. Beer and BoJack.

— —

I had stopped self harming, as I had promised myself since the 10 stitches to never start again. But suicide was still a big subject in my mind.

The website I had discovered, has the most common methods of suicide in order of success rate. And hanging myself seemed like an okay technique.

I wanted to test it out without actually killing myself.

I know it sounds weird.

I wanted to try and see if it was doable without actually doing it all the way.

——

I took the cotton belt off from my work trousers. I thought to myself that I wouldn’t need it anymore, as I don’t have a job anymore.

I tied a knot around my clothes hanger in my wardrobe, and tied the other side around my neck.

Then, I very gently bent my legs (as I could touch the floor).

The next thing I remember is waking up with the belt around my neck, in my wardrobe.

Saliva was all over my mouth. Snot was dripping from my nose.

It scared me.

I couldn’t undo the tight knot around my neck so cut it off with a pair of kitchen scissors.

I threw the belt in the bin and laid in my bed in a state of shock.

I phoned a friend at the time, and told him what just happened to me.

He came over and we talked about it.

— —

I liked him, he promised not to tell anyone and let me drink.

Yolo and Julie where more worried and protective. They would judge how much I would drink, and I didn’t really like that.

— —

One day, a colleague/friend of mine was organizing a small party at his house with about 8 people.

Julie, her boyfriend, Yolo and I all went along with other ex-work colleagues.

I got drunk quickly. And when I drank, I would talk too much.

I told a friend/ex-work colleague that I tried to hang myself the other day just to try it out but ended up fainting.

— —

Later that evening, I went home to my flat and fell asleep.

Around 3 in the morning, my door bell rang.

I didn’t know who it was, but opened the door all tired.

It was Julie, Yolo and another friend.

They were really worried about me.

What I had said at that party has gotten out, and everyone knew about it.

They told me I needed to go back to the hospital.

So I did the very next morning.

— —

I went back to The Maison Blanche, and stayed there for 12 nights.

One of the male nurses saw me and asked why I was back, again.

I told him what had happened and he was very nice. He gave me advice and listened to me.

He mentioned that we should go out for drinks once I get out of the hospital. I agreed and gave him my number.

— —

We texted that night, while I was in my hospital bed.

Our text messages were very flirtatious.

The next following days we had sexual relations in my hospital room, and in the storage room.

— —

Once I left La Maison Blanche, I invited Alienor over to drink and take cocaine.

And I told her about my romantic affair I had at the hospital.

She didn’t seem surprised. She told me that another female patient had sexual relations with a nurse there too, and she wondered if it was the same nurse. So did I.

We sent a message to the girl in question and asked her to describe the male nurse she had relations with.

It was him. Paul. And she was 17.

— —

This suddenly felt wrong and I had to tell someone. So I told my mother about Paul and also Jacques.

She was really angry. More so about Paul the nurse than Jacques. But I felt the opposite.

I didn’t feel taken advantage of by Paul. But Jaques really hurt me.

My mother wanted me to report both of them to the police, so I did.

— —

My parents didn’t trust me living alone in such a big city so far away. I needed help.

In May 2019 I want to Rehab for alcohol and cocaine addiction.

I spent one month there. It was much nicer than the hospital. They had a ping-ping table, a chess set and many more activities.

I spent a month in Rehab and it was really nice to be away from alcohol.

Alcohol affected me in bad ways.

I would say so many things I regret. I would hurt myself and make bad decisions.

I drank so much that when I didn’t, I would uncontrollably shake and feel faintish.

Rehab made me want to stop forever.

— —

My mother would visit me often and it was lovely to see her. She was very supportive.

After leaving Rehab, it was time for me to leave Paris forever and move back in with my parents down South of France.

I needed to not be alone. I needed help.

— —

I moved back into my old bedroom with my vinyls and The White Stripes posters. It was comforting.

I was now taking more medication : Paroxetine (20mg) and Abilify (5mg).

And it was making me feel better.

My mother wanted me to see one of the best therapists in France.

So I started seeing a new psychiatrist in Bordeaux, FR (1h away by train) every two weeks.

At first we did not get along.

I wanted him to help me forget about my ex, but he explained that it was not possible to forget the past, you must accept it as part of you, like a scar.

He wanted me start writing about my feelings in a journal. I was not good at it and did not enjoy it. But I did it anyway.

— —

A few months later, I was starting to feel much better and stronger.

My therapist was really helping me, and so was my family.

I decided it was time to find a job near my parents house.

In October 2019, I found a job as an Exhibition Assistant for a company in events.

I was saving up to move to Sydney, Australia. To start a new life far away. To a place I’ve always wanted to go to.

I’ve never been to Australia but didn’t care.

— —

Working for this company was not fun, and a lot of pressure. They wanted to me make a minimum of 200 phone calls a day. And I hated being on the phone.

I told my therapist about my job being very pressurizing and he told me to quite and move to Sydney sooner.

That sounded like a great plan! I was so happy about this decision.

I went home and bought myself a Working Holiday Visa.

— —

My psychiatrist decided it was time to stop my medication as I was doing really well.

So I stopped them gradually.

The withdraw effects were a nightmare.

I was sweating, felt nauseous, had diarrhea, felt extremely emotional…

But that only lasted for about 2 weeks.

I was so happy that I wasn’t taking any medication anymore!

I felt on top of the world.

— —

For New Years Eve, I decided to go see my old friends from when I was doing my Sound Engineering course.

I told them about what had happened to me, and I could see it made them sad. They told me that I was such a happy person before. That I didn’t deserve this.

I told them I was fine now and that it was in the past.

I didn’t drink on NYE and they respected that. But I felt odd. I felt numb for some reason. They loved me so much and expressed it. But I didn’t seem to feel the same way. I used to. But not anymore. I didn’t feel love for anyone and that worried me. I felt like a ghost.

— —

My mother picked me up and could tell that I was different.

I went to work the following day and did not feel well at all.

I could feel it all coming back. I was so scared and ashamed of relapsing. But I knew I was.

I told my boss that I wasn’t feeling well and she let me go home.

I got back home and told my parents : I think I’m depressed again…

— —

I saw my therapist again and every session he would read what I wrote.

This was the last time I wrote in my diary.

He closed my black book and called my mother in.

He told me I needed to go back to a psychiatric hospital.

— —

My parents drove me back home from Bordeaux after that session and we packed a suitcase and went to the nearest psychiatric hospital. La Candelie in Agen.

I remember hearing my therapist on the phone to the hospital telling them I have Borderline Personality Disorder. I had no idea what that was.

— —

I arrived at La Candelie and spent 7 weeks there.

I was not in a good state of mind.

I tried hanging myself multiple times there in the shower but couldn’t let go of all of my weight by bending my legs. I just couldn’t.

I cut myself often and managed to bring in Vodka.

It was a mess.

— —

They put me in the isolation room for one night.

The isolation room was horrific.

They gave me paper pajamas that would rip with the slightest movement.

The door was locked and I had a bucket to pee in.

I was not allowed a pillow or a blanket. It was so cold and my pajamas were ripped everywhere.

The next morning, I saw a psychiatrist from the hospital and told him that I was fine and just being dramatic. I did not want to go back there.

— —

After 7 long weeks I was finally allowed out.

It was a long time.

I was now on even more medication : Paroxetine, Abilify, Tercian, Alprazolam and Mirtazapine.

I felt so numb. Better, but numb.

Australia was not an option anymore. Not for a while anyway.

— —

Once I left the hospital, I was obliged to have a nurse come to my parents house every morning and evening to make sure that I take all my medication properly.

I also had to go a psychological-medical center once a week.

I got tired of explaining what happened when, where and why. It was hard to remember. So I decided to write all the bullet points down on a piece of paper.

— —

· Where am I now?

Today is the 13th of May 2021. I still suffer from my mental illness even though I wish it was all in the past.

I’m currently taking Mirtazapine, Abilify and Alprazolam and only see a nurse once a week to restock on medication.

My therapist appointments have been elongated to once a month.

I haven’t self harmed in about a year.

I do however still have episodes with suicidal thoughts, but they are less severe.

My therapist from Paris once told me that you will have ups and downs, but with time the ups will be less up and the downs less down.

It’s starting to make sense now.

I currently live in a small city called Agen (30m drive from my parents house) with my boyfriend Yann. He’s the best.

We met through an old friend of mine that I reconnected with last year.

I still don’t have many friends where I live, as they are all over the place (Montpellier, London and Paris)

— —

My mother took an online course about Borderline Personality Disorder, which I really appreciate. I feel like maybe she understands a part of me more.

— —

Julie left Paris and moved to Montpellier to become a Yoga instructor. She and her boyfriend are still together, building their new life in the South of France.

— —

Yolo is still in Paris, she recently got a job as a video editor for a cool company. She’s doing great.

— —

Pri is still in London, not as an Au Pair anymore but as a chef by day, and an Art Salon organizer by night. She’s always been very productive and I admire that.

— —

Alienor unfortunately is back in the hospital in Paris, La Maison Blanche, as she tried to commit suicide by jumping off of a bridge above train rails. She lost both of her legs and one arm, but thankfully survived.

— —

The criminal cases concerning Jacques and Paul the nurse, are still going on. It’s been a very long process but I hope it ends soon.

— —

I don’t have any news at all regarding Julien and do not plan on having any.

— —

· Why am I writing this?

Like I wrote at the beginning of this, longer than expected text, about my mental health, I am writing this for me, my family and friends and hopefully others who may relate to it and seek help if they need it.

I often mentioned that I felt under control of the situation, but I was wrong. So maybe someone reading this might make the decision to seek help.

I have no words to describe how thankful I am to the people who helped me.

This is not a suicide note, it’s the opposite. It’s a “life” note.

A note to remind me that some days can be nice and happy, but others can be very, very hard. But you must go on. You must keep on fighting. It might seem like an endless battle but it gets better.

Sometimes that’s hard to see. But I see it now.

#borderline life #borderline personality traits #bpd #borderline personality disorder #mental health #mental illness #addiction #love #love story

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whumpiary · 4 years

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BTHB (@badthingshappenbingo) Fill: Manhandling | Requested by: @my-whumpy-little-heart (approximately 12 million years ago)

[content warning: referenced noncon/dubcon, abuse of power, threats of death, mild suicidal ideation/self-endangering thoughts, alcohol mention]

Cass doesn’t quite wake up to the sliding thud of his boarding door opening but by the time Tucker slams on the light with a fist against the switch, and thumps the wall with three shuddering thuds, Cass finds himself sitting up before his brain has time to process.

“The fuck’re you doing?” he starts. Cass squints up through the light at the man towering over him as he tries to get his heart to chill the fuck out. “Wha'time is it?”

“Do you have any idea how much I just lost?”

Cass sighs wearily, dropping an arm over his eyes as he slumps back down.

“Told y'not to play cards with AJ,” he slurs “She cheats”

“Oh I’m talking about a lot more than a little game of cards, Ace,” Tucker says, low and growling “But I think you know that”

Tucker grabs him by the collar with such force that Cass hears the threading of his t-shirt tearing as he’s hauled up, slammed against the wall. He’s instantly winded, breath beaten out of him, and in the moments searching for air he tries to focus, running his eyes over Tucker and realising that the usually immaculately presented man is in fucking disarray.

His hair is pushed wild and unkempt. His shirt is partially untucked, sleeves shoved to the elbows, not rolled. He’s not wearing a jacket. He’s not wearing his glasses. His tie hangs loose around his neck like an untightened noose.

“Are you drunk?”

“Might’ve had a few,” Tucker says, his breath soured with whiskey “Does that make you nervous, Ace?”

Cass tries to catch his breath back in long slow drafts instead of the gasps his lungs are begging for as he gives Tucker another once-over. “Depends what kind of drunk you are, I guess”

Tucker barely holds back a snarl, “I’m not in the mood for cute. You fucked me tonight”

“Oh that was you? I thought it was a particularly tense a-”

Before Cass can even finish the sentence, there’s a fist in his hair and his head is slammed against the wall. He barks a laugh in shock.

“Jeremy Beetham,” Tucker spits “That name mean anything to you?”

“Dunno,” Cass says, trying to blinks through the dizzy “Sounds very ‘my parents paid for me to get off the wait-list at an Ivy League’”

Another slam and Cass grits his teeth, slams his eyes closed. He breathes through his nose, hard, as pain cracks through his head in a blinding flash.

“What about Winona Evans?” Tucker snarls “Leonard Bernadi? Richard Goa? Bellamy Saints?”

“To be honest I think you just made that last one u-”

Another slam. Jesus. He’s gonna lose brain function in a minute.

“You don’t remember them because you never fucking met them, did you?” Tucker says, yanking Cass’ head back with that same relentless grip in his hair “You never met them, you never talked to them, you never named them, and you certainly never got them to meet the settlement contracts I needed you to”

Understanding and annoyance dawn on Cass in the exact same instant.

“This is about that Hellcat thing?” he asks “You’re joking right?”

“Sixteen million dollars in company losses overnight is a pretty expensive joke, don’t you think?”

Okay, Cass reasons. Okay so this is maybe very bad.

“But see the thing is Ace, maybe it is a joke to you. Because you’re not the one who has to talk to the higher ups after that sort of loss, are you?” Tucker’s breath is fucking ripe with booze. He drops his grip on Cass’ hair, his hand instead settling lightly around Cass’ throat. There’s no tension there. Not yet. But there will be. Cass breathes in.“I’m the one who has to have four different meetings, with four different goddamn sectors of the goddamn company. I’m the one that had to figure out how to flip this into a vaguely neutral situation, instead of something bad enough to get us both castrated”

“Well let’s be real, that wouldn’t be much of a loss for y—”

Cass actually sees stars this time. Literal starbursts of white cross his vision and the crack of pain along the back of his skull starts to wrap around and drill in at his temples.

“Shut up,” Tucker spits, his hands tighten around Cassius’ neck as he speaks “I am done with jokes, Ace. We are so far beyond jokes now.”

Cass jerks his shoulders, tries to wriggle out of Tucker’s grip because he’s been violent before, sure. He’s said things like this before, too. But he’s never meant it. There’s never been that look in his eyes.

“See, I had to beg to keep my job today. I had to beg not to have this entire fucking project dissolved. And then I had to beg to keep you from being sent back to Bergen”

Cass freezes, eyes wide.

“Yeah, Ace,” Tucker mutters, a bitter little smile curling his lips. He takes the opportunity to press his hands even closer to Cass’ throat. Cass breathes in. No air comes “That’s right. I had to get down on my fucking knees in front of the fucking director and come up with reasons why Christopher Bergen’s little whore boy shouldn’t get sent right back home to him”

Cass closes his eyes tight, clenches his jaw. It’s fine. It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine. He’s not going back there. Tucker’s hands squeeze tighter and that’s fine too. Cassius feels his chest start to tighten, the first warning signs of not enough air, and it’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine, because he’s not going back there.

“Do you know how many questions I had to answer? Huh? Do you know how much I had to justify your fucking worth to the goddamn company?”

Cass grabs at the hands at his throat, fingers curling around fingers and trying to tear them away. He tries to thrash, but ends up with more of Tucker’s weight pushing down on him than before. He can breathe just barely if he tilts his head up.

“And after all those meetings, after all that time on my knees, I got thinking… Why the fuck was I the one begging? Why was i the one grovelling again and again when it wasn’t my fucking mistake? Huh?”

Tucker’s grip is starting to bruise now. Cass can feel his heart still desperately trying to circulate blood to his brain despite it. A thumping beat beat beat that feels less like a pulse and more like a hammer to the head.

“I’m not gonna get my bonus. I’m not gonna get my promotion. I fucking debased myself for you, again and again and again and as one of the executives so kindly pointed out I’m not even fucking you. So I think I deserve something in return, don’t you?”

Cass hits the wall with his hand and that’s stupid because it’s using up energy he doesn’t have but he needs air.

“Do you know what I want, Cass?” he says, eyes dropping heavy to Cass’ gasping mouth, then back up again “Actually why don’t you tell me what I want, huh? You reach into my head, and you tell me what I want and I’ll let you go right now and consider your punishment paid”

Of course he can’t. He never can with Tucker. It’s cracked and oozing and wrong and his mind flinches away from it before he can touch it like a hand to a flame. He shakes his head, mouth gaping open. He needs air. He doesn’t fucking know. He never knows.

“I want you to beg me,” Tucker spits “I want you to beg me, like I had to beg every single one of those fucking executives. I want you to beg me not to bash your skull in. I want you to beg me not to kill you. And I want you to beg me not to send you right back to the silk sheets I hauled you from because right at this moment I don’t know if I’m all that invested in this little game of ours anymore"

Tucker pushes away from the wall, from Cass, with a hard shove and Cass reels. He sucks in air desperately, hands pressed flat to the wall behind him just to stop himself from doubling over. He tilts his head to the ceiling to make space for oxygen to fall back in.

There’s not enough time for him to catch his breath before Tucker’s back on him again, hand squeezing at his jaw.

“I bet you haven’t begged in your whole life have you, Ace? Certainly not for me”

Cass paints his gaze carefully blank as he makes eye contact, heaving in wheezing breaths. Tucker has that hazed, drunk look of someone who knows exactly what they want and exactly how they’re going to get it. He wets his lips with a quick dart of his tongue and Cass pretends it doesn’t freeze the blood in his veins.

“You begged for him, though. Didn’t you?” Tucker purrs, the faintest hint of a smile at his lips. He reaches out, tucks a strand of hair behind Cassius’ ear, traces his hand down his cheek. Cass doesn’t flinch, even as a wave of cold shock runs through him. “Go on. Darling boy. Show me how you begged for Christopher”

Cass raises his chin higher. He holds Tucker’s gaze as he reaches for the man’s hands, pulling them towards himself until Tucker’s fingers curl back around his own aching throat.

Tucker laughs, a twisted mix of shock and delight. His eyes drop to Cassius’ throat. He licks his lips again. Almost tempted. But then he sneers, “Cute, sweetheart, but not what I asked for"

His knee hits into Cass’ stomach so hard it has the younger man doubled over. Another kick to his legs and his knees are hitting hard on the ground before he even as a chance to straighten. Cass lets out a quiet groan, a little exhale of sound to push out the heaving nausea that hits him as he’s shoved around.

“This is better isn’t it?” Tucker says, looking down on him like he’s just won some prize. His hand trails slowly down Cass’ cheek. Across his jaw. Along his chin. “It’s gotta be muscle memory for you by now, huh? Being on your knees?”

His thumb grazes up to ghost across Cass’ mouth, pulling down his lower lip. Cass knows that look. He’s seen it so many times that having it land on him almost feels like coming home. He wonders, for the barest of moments, if he should bite or suck. Instead he just holds his gaze.

“Thought I wasn’t your type”

Like a spell being broken, Tucker snaps his hand away. He practically snarls with disgust.

“You’re still not"

The blow to the side of his head is expected. It still sends him flying to the ground. Cass catches himself just before his face crashes into the floor. He can taste blood in his mouth, He spits it onto the polished concrete. He’s always liked the way blood and saliva look pooled together, Like they’re their own kind of marble.

“Beg”

Tucker’s foot nudges his shoulder and when he doesn’t move, he’s instead kicked in the gut. And again. And again. And again. And again.

“Beg”

Cass takes a ragged breath. Let’s out a laugh.

The hand in his hair actually hurts this time. And isn’t that funny? The way a thing can hurt and then it can fucking hurt. It feels like his skin tearing from his scalp. He wonders if that was even possible, or if maybe the hair follicles would snap first. Maybe if he survives he’ll look it up.

He feels his head smack into the leg of the desk. He considers telling Tucker that there’ll be more blood if he aims for the temple. More blood was more satisfying, right? Another whack.

“Beg me to stop”

He feels his body being turned over and then he’s being hauled up by his shirt again. His face is being hit. Again. Again. Again. That’s gonna bruise. Shit. Sorry, Henri.

“Or I swear to God I’ll kill you”

He’s dropped, lying flat on his back now with the wind knocked back out of him — Jesus, just give a guy a second to catch his breath. Tucker’s got his knees either side of his hips and his hands are back on his throat.

Cass feels himself laughing again. There’s blood in his mouth. Maybe he bit down on his tongue.

“Can’t beg if I can’t breathe,” he croaks out.

“Can’t talk back either, you little shit”

His throat is already sensitive from earlier, a dull bruised kind of ache that releases and relents as it’s pressed into again. Like his throat knows it’s best served when a tightening grip is settled on it.

The blackness crackles in almost instantly this time, darkening around the edges of his vision like a tide, accompanied with the rush of blood in his ears. He tips his head right back, closes his eyes. He has the passing thought that maybe he’s going to die like this. But that’s fine. It’s fine, it’s fine. Because he’s not going back to Christopher. So if this is what dying is, he doesn’t mind.

As soon as he thinks it, the world comes swimming in again.

“What is it gonna take, huh?” Tucker’s so close to Cass’ face he can feel his spit flecking onto his cheeks. It’s like getting beaten up just before the rain comes in. He’s always kinda liked that. A storm to wash the blood away. “Answer me!”

A blow to his stomach. And another. And another.

Cass feels like he’s floating, like he’s never existed outside of this second here and he never will again. Maybe he hasn’t. Maybe he won’t.

“What’s it gonna take for you to fucking break?”

Cass grins up at Tucker, a swaying haze with three heads up above him, and lets out a laugh that bruises his throat from the inside out, “Why don’ we find out?”

#who forgot i had a bthb card bc i sure didnt #implied or referenced noncon #whump drabble #choking #strangulation #abuse of power #tucker #cassius #nell does bthb

67 notes · View notes

d-criss-news · 5 years

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When it was announced that The Rosie O'Donnell Show would be back for one night only with a guest list of about 15 million Broadway talents, many of us wondered, would it be a return to the glory days of her multiple Emmy-winning daytime talk show or more like her ill-fated attempt to resuscitate the primetime variety format on NBC in 2008. It turned out to borrow from both those predecessors while evolving into something completely different — a low-tech lovefest that felt like eavesdropping on a group chat among friends looking out for one another in a time of need.

It was spontaneous, messy and blighted by some of the worst audio glitches imaginable. Yet it was often affectingly intimate, and even over an endurance-testing three-and-a-half commercial-free hours, also strangely addictive. The lack of slickness seemed to carry through to the relaxed manner of the guests, and their refreshing unpretentiousness.

Conceived by actor-producer (and occasional tech-support helpmate) Erich Bergen and live-streamed on Broadway.com and the website's YouTube channel, the show was a benefit for The Actors Fund, the charitable organization founded in 1882 that supports performers and behind-the-scenes theater workers. It raised more than half-a-million dollars, O'Donnell announced at the end of the marathon, sitting in a Hamilton hoodie and offering a champagne toast in a glass emblazoned with the face of Barbra Streisand.

She conducted the entire show from behind a laptop in her New Jersey garage, its floor spattered with the paint spillage of countless craft projects. "I'm a little bit of a Broadway nerd, I admit it," said O'Donnell, establishing her dual role as host and superfan.

Part of the show's unique pleasure was seeing favorite Broadway performers chilling in their own homes, almost all of them dressed down, with little visible attention to makeup or hair, and zero concern about unflattering angles. It was a great equalizer, proving that even artists who can hold packed theaters in the palm of their hands with a song are housebound and trying to make the best of a bad situation just like the rest of us — staying close to their families, killing time, learning to cook, wondering how long this unnerving isolation will last. Or how much longer we can put off that shower.

It was kind of comforting to see Idina Menzel sitting by her microwave and confessing, "I guess I'm going a little bonkers," while lamenting a failed lasagna attempt and sharing the challenges of homeschooling her son when she's no math genius. Likewise, hearing Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker talk about watching Columbo reruns or catching up on The Crown, while SJP begged for no spoilers on the final episode of The Sopranos, which she may now get to at last. Seeing Annette Bening on her Los Angeles balcony wearing a "Make America Kind Again" baseball cap was as much a tonic as watching Neil Patrick Harris do a card trick with his adorable twins. And who doesn't want to meet Gloria and Emilio Estefan's cute rescue dogs or hear about Lin-Manuel Miranda's kids' reaction to their first exposure to Singin' in the Rain?

Then there were the musical interludes.

Where else could you catch Patti LuPone, in magnificent voice, singing the urgently upbeat 1930s standard "A Hundred Years From Today," unaccompanied while sitting by the jukebox in her basement? Or Kelli O'Hara nestled into an armchair honoring Stephen Sondheim's 90th birthday by wrapping her crystalline soprano around "Take Me to the World," a hymn to unity from Evening Primrose? Or husband and wife Audra McDonald and Will Swenson duetting on the Charlie Chaplin evergreen, "Smile," from their Westchester living room? Or Darren Criss pouring his heart into another Sondheim classic about the desire for connection, "Being Alive," from Company, accompanying himself in a lovely pop arrangement on acoustic guitar from the sofa of his Los Angeles home? And while sound problems plagued Barry Manilow's selection of hits, ending with "I Made It Through the Rain," I was tickled to see his Judy Garland Kleenex dispenser.

Many of the song choices were thoughtfully apropos of the current crisis, offering comforting reassurance of the eventual return of resilience and togetherness while people in major cities all over the country self-isolate as the infection rate of the coronavirus pandemic continues to climb. Maybe Tituss Burgess at his home keyboard singing "The Glory of Love" is exactly the kind of uplift we all need right now.

Even in the seemingly random numbers, the entire enterprise was characterized by a spirit of generosity and sharing.

Kristin Chenoweth celebrated a Starbucks romance in "Taylor the Latte Boy." Matthew Morrison goofed it up on ukulele to a mashup of "The Bare Necessities" and "Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah" from his Disney Dreamin' album. Alan Menken whipped through a medley of his songs from The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast and Little Shop of Horrors, among others, at the piano. Ben Platt, also at the keyboard, did Bob Dylan's "Make You Feel My Love." And Adrienne Warren, the sensational star of Tina: The Tina Turner Musical, growled out "Simply the Best" from her bathtub. That was on the third attempt during a particularly troublesome audio patch, by which time her bubbles were history.

Prompted by O'Donnell, more than one guest reminded viewers that The Actors Fund is not just about Broadway artists pulling star salaries but also stagehands, makeup artists, wigmakers and ushers who work in what is very much a gig economy. The organization provides emergency financial assistance, social services, affordable housing, healthcare and insurance counseling and addiction support.

"Everything's a one-off," said Tony-winning actor Brian Stokes Mitchell, who serves as chairman of The Actors Fund. "That's how we get by, and many people are living on the edge right now."

"We're all just one, two, maybe three paychecks away from bankruptcy," added Billy Porter, whose mother is in an Actors Fund nursing home. "In this community, our whole job description is insecurity," said Judith Light.

Porter, along with Lea Salonga and longtime activist Light recalled how Broadway was on the frontlines of another life-threatening struggle during the early days of the AIDS crisis. All of them urged viewers to stay strong and take the time to reflect on the value of solidarity.

While O'Donnell has never been shy about her opposition to Donald Trump and everything he stands for, the show was remarkably light on politics, with just the occasional dig slipping through. She opened with a little celebratory "Yay!" while admitting she had missed the president's daily coronavirus press update, and then explained that she and her guests were not there to talk Trump. When Harvey Fierstein, O'Donnell's 2005 stage husband in Fiddler on the Roof, reminded her of all the election work still to be done, she said, "Let's all just know, we deserve a leader who tells the truth." And the delays in making coronavirus testing more widely available prompted a comment that the government should have gotten busy on that back in January when the writing was already on the wall.

Mostly, however, the hastily revamped Rosie O'Donnell Show was about bringing people together at this time of anxiety and isolation, as the host reconnected with artists whom she has championed since her reign as the Queen of Nice. "Everyone in the community loves you," she told Chita Rivera in a particularly effusive greeting. "You are our queen mother!"

Many of the performers would have been decompressing after rehearsals or Sunday matinees if the Broadway shutdown hadn't happened — Criss in American Buffalo, Broderick and Parker in Plaza Suite, Warren in Tina, Lauren Patten and Elizabeth Stanley in Jagged Little Pill. Sunday would have been LuPone's opening night in the gender-flipped revival of Company. Gavin Creel, who abruptly ended his London run in Waitress to fly home and is in isolation in a cabin in upstate New York, revealed the fear that he might have contracted the virus, given that several others in the cast have fallen ill, with one of them testing positive.

The show bridged the gap separating us from artists whose work we normally experience on the other side of the footlights. Most of us will never again get to see Stephen Sondheim and Andrew Lloyd Webber exchange greetings in song on the birthday the two composers happen to share. From those celebrated veterans to rising-star newbies, the common denominator here was everybody facing the crisis just like us, reaching out a hand of friendship, albeit from a mandatory safe distance.

#darren criss #rosie o’donnell #rosie o'donnell show livestream #the hollywood reporter #press #march 2020

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ronfloorspaint-blog · 4 years

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interior painter painting

https://www.ronsfloorspainting.com/

interior painter painting Hardwood floor refinishing -------------- A-1 Ron's hardwood flooring and painting we are a interior exterior hardwood flooring refinishing company that we service Bergen and Essex Passaic County lanoixtigree

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heliumdish07-blog · 4 years

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Lawyers in Alkmaar - Why You Must Get in touch with a Lawyer in Alkmaar

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The Keys To Making Online Law College Successful.

Advocaten In Nederland, Alkmaar.

Law Institution Professors.

Lawyers Workplace Appelman Alkmaar

Another interesting example is France, where for much of the 20th century, all judiciary officials were graduates of an elite expert college for judges. The study brought in a total of 155 feedbacks, that included 97 in law practice as well as 35 in business legal departments. Several, 43 per cent, worked in a firm or legal department with 2 to 9 lawyers and also many, 57 per cent, had just one workplace. Lawyers in private method normally operate in specialized companies known as law office, with the exception of English lawyers.

The Keys To Making Online Law Institution Effective.

Nonetheless, in a large number of nations, a law pupil have to pass a bar examination prior to getting a permit to exercise. In a handful of U.S. states, one may come to be an attorney (a so-called nation lawyer) by simply "reading law" as well as passing the bar exam, without having to attend law institution initially. Some countries require extensive clinical training in the form of instructions or unique medical courses.

Therefore, be particular that you get all these details and compare to learn which will certainly work for you. Due to the fact that they have spent a lot of money as well as time as well as initiatives right into making certain that they obtain to the degree of affection for clients, this is. In situation you need assist with conflicts or special Work problems linked to employment, this is precisely what you need. The very best law office will have work law lawyers Alkmaar prepared to be specific that these concerns do not swallow you.

I know companions in small metros at 20 person law companies clearing close to a $400k a year. A high quantity accident TV lawyer that just recently started I recognize removed that much in one backup situation recently. For lots of lawyers, practicing law in New york city is the supreme objective-- the most distinguished companies on the planet call it home.

Some territories have 2 sorts of lawyers, barrister and also lawyers, whilst others fuse the two. A barrister is a lawyer who concentrates on higher court appearances. A solicitor is a lawyer who is trained to offer and also prepare situations suggestions on lawful topics and can stand for individuals in lower courts.

Other possible work contexts include exclusive methods, law firms, federal government organizations, and also corporate workplaces. Possible functions consist of public interest lawyer, government prosecutor, internal company guidance, or public defense attorney. Physicians acknowledge the value in possessing equity investments in brand-new medications, medical gadgets and clinical devices. A few of them will have components of the health center where they function. This is one more area where lawyers appear to vary dramatically.

Ali Eslami, handling lawyer at Allied Lawyers is an extremely reputed name, proclaims years of hands-on experience in global law. So, irrespective of your needs and requirements, hand-in-hand with Ali Eslami lawyer Canada based, enjoy the very best legal option.

Many law students begin their expert training during law college via law institution facilities with not-for-profit companies. Working under the supervision of knowledgeable lawyers, pupils in these facilities take part in real-world legal obligations such as checking out situations as well as counseling clients. King & Timber Mallesons is a multinational law office with workplaces in 14 nations. Its predecessor firms consisted of King & Wood and Mallesons Stephen Jaques, formerly one of Australias Big Six.

In developing nations like India, a huge bulk of law pupils never ever actually technique, yet merely use their law degree as a foundation for professions in various other fields. Legal guidance is the application of abstract concepts of law to the concrete truths of the customer's case in order to advise the customer regarding what they need to do following. In several nations, just a correctly accredited lawyer may provide legal suggestions to clients completely factor to consider, even if no suit is considered or remains in development.

ABA regulation 1.8 permits business deals w/ customers though greatly regulates it. If lawyers took bigger risks with their occupations I believe they 'd see even more revenues though the majority of are threat averse as it's the most valuable state of mind in a career that sells danger allotment. I understand a late occupation insurance coverage defense attorney in 3 person law firm getting rid of ~$ 120k a year regularly.

A couple of countries prefer to show with designated readings of judicial opinions adhered to by extreme in-class interrogation by the professor. Many others have just lectures on highly abstract lawful teachings, which forces young lawyers to identify exactly how to really believe and also write like a lawyer at their very first instruction.

A lot more law colleges are additionally starting to use much shorter and also much shorter courses-- practically like Exec Education and learning for people thinking about specific legal subjects. So if you intend to discover one area of law you can currently do so in 6-10 week programs that don't need returning to school full-time.

The variety of lawyers used at the fifty largest Dutch law firms boosted by 2% to more than 4,400, in 2015, discloses new analysis. Development was highest in the leading 10 section of the law market, with a rise of 10%, accounting for practically 100 additional lawyers. I wonder if legal tech is guaranteeing for equity investment like med technology is for physicians?

The flexible career of consulting can enable lawyers to pick which organizations they serve. Consultants might help companies, not-for-profit organizations, governments, or specific clients. Lawyer tasks as well as work vary relying on job, field, and company context. Some experts largely supply lawful advise, while other lawyers represent customers routinely in court.

Have You Obtained financial disagreements or concerns in The location of tax obligation law? Also, advocaat alkmaar may get answers to your inquiries to assist you have a mind.

Both barristers as well as lawyers have gone through law college, completed the requisite functional training. However, in territories where there is a split-profession, only barristers are confessed as members of their corresponding bar organization. On-the-job training for lawyers depends somewhat on expertise, sector, and also job goals.

Tort regulations covers situations entailing mishaps, all-natural catastrophes, wrongful fatality, etc . The accident of individuals and additionally residential or commercial property damage may result from a tort insurance coverage case.

Caesar van Everdingen was buried on 13 October 1678 in the Grote Kerk in Alkmaar. His widow Helena van Oosthoorn provided several of the paints in her property to the Van Everdingen family members. She ultimately wed Pieter Gerritsz Lang, the sheriff of Bergen, near Alkmaar, yet the marriage ended in separation in 1687. Helena was hidden in the Grote Kerk on 22 June 1694, in the same tomb as Caesar. If so, do not shed the possibility to update your company's profile, add products, offers and also greater position in internet search engine.

Furthermore, if you're working with a firm that's bankrupt, you need aid. Reputable as well as professional lawyers are ready and also delighted to assist you in this area of lawenforcement. As a business owner, you can check out a law Firm in Alkmaar to aid manage all threats or perhaps develop possibilities. The most effective law practice will primarily be taken part as your attorney to guidance you regarding exactly how to resolve estates.

It will be interesting to see exactly how these need patterns alter the large law practice over time. I love your blog site BTW-- I am not a lawyer, however I am a high net worth Millennial and also appreciate your viewpoints. The very first university degrees, beginning with the law school of the College of Bologna in the 11th century, were all law levels as well as doctorates. Levels in other areas did not begin till the 13th century, however the medical professional remained to be the only level offered at most of the old colleges till the 20th century.

After one gains a law level, occupation flexibility may be badly constrained. For example, unlike their American equivalents, it is challenging for German judges to leave the bench as well as end up being advocates secretive practice.

Who makes more solicitors or barristers?

Solicitors have a more stable income but the top barristers get paid more than most top solicitors; although the average solicitor may be paid more. Add to that the one year barristers have to spend in pupillage/deviling and the risks of taking the barrister path are higher.

We have experience managing lots of top-level matters and also transactions in the Netherlands, consisting of working with pan-European issues. With our strong setting in the Dutch service neighborhood and our roots in the United States, we really are a Dutch law firm with an American heart.

Are you looking for legal advice in any kind of kind from the Alkmaar area?

The best law firms will certainly have labor law lawyers Alkmaar prepared to see to it that these issues do not ingest you in.

They make sure that you get all that's suitable based on the law.

You have to know that not all of law firm Alkmaar solutions could assist you if you do.

Advocaten In Nederland, Alkmaar.

During Safe's Yearly Associate Study, we asked associates who work in the Large Apple to rank the reputations of peer firms within NYC. Maintain reviewing to figure out the most prestigious law office in New York.

The sufferer may file a claim against the charged for the problems occurring from the tort. The regulations of tort consists of circumstances including negligent, willful as well as also untrustworthy activities and also suitables for damages as well as injuries that occurred from those activities. Most lawyers work for district lawyer offices, law governments, firms, or firms, however some lawyers run exclusive methods or work individually as consultants.

What type of lawyer gets paid the most in Australia?

What Type of Lawyer Earns the Most?General-In-House Lawyers came first, at an average annual salary of $128,988. Constructions Lawyers came second highest, at an average annual salary of $124,041. Corporate & Commercial Lawyers come third highest, at an average annual salary of $118,558. More items•

With the region of residential property law and residential or commercial property being essential, these legal aids will can be found in to guide you on clients, programmers, as well as specialists. Family law is established for issues associating with marriage partnership, fostering, child security, separation, splitting up and different other issues worrying relative issues. It manages the young people in addition to with the moms and dads along with their participation.

Lawyers seldom invest alongside their customers in transaction, neither do they seem to have equity stakes in company endeavors related to the practice of law. This is different than various other countries, like Australia, where law firms are noted on the public exchanges. I have had the opportunity to run digital advertising campaigns for a number of the top law colleges in the US-- both for their JD and LLM programs. There are some actually fascinating fads that highlight exactly how demand for law degrees are altering. First, rate of interest in JD programs has actually dropped significantly over the previous 5 years.

The term "medical professional" has actually given that fallen into disuse, although it is still a legal title in Italy as well as being used in lots of nations outside of Europe. In a lot of civil law nations, lawyers generally structure their legal education and learning around their selected specialized; the borders in between different kinds of lawyers are meticulously defined as well as tough to cross.

The vast majority of law firms worldwide are small companies that range in size from 1 to 10 lawyers. The USA, with its large number of firms with more than 50 lawyers, is an exception. The United Kingdom and Australia are also exceptions, as the UK, Australia as well as the U.S. are now home to a number of firms with more than 1,000 lawyers after a wave of mergings in the late 1990s. Subscribe and also obtain breaking information, discourse, as well as point of views on law practice, lawyers, law institutions, claims, judges, and also extra.

Just make your inheritance troubles known to the lawyer. Is it your desire to market Or rent out your company area or house?

Law College Professors.

To learn more, please go to Allied Lawyers site. Among the top global litigation as well as service law office in Canada, Fasken LLP has almost 700 lawyers spread out across 10 workplaces on four continents. Workplaces for this company lie all throughout Canada, including Toronto, Calgary, Ottawa, as well as Quebec. The company has worldwide workplaces located in Paris as well as London, in addition to a branch workplace in South Africa as well as China. With 180 lawyers, tax obligation notaries, consultants and economic experts, we provide Dutch and also foreign multinationals regional as well as cross-border legal as well as tax advice.

Recognized in the marketplace for our cutting-edge, pragmatic method, we aid customers confiscate opportunities, alleviate risks and fix complicated service, lawful as well as tax obligation concerns. Our office was the first Dutch law practice to join a multinational network and also develop an incorporated civil, financial and notarial method. In many common law countries, particularly those with fused professions, lawyers have many choices over the course of their careers. Besides personal technique, they can come to be a prosecutor, federal government advice, company internal guidance, management law court, law, court, or mediator professor. There are also several non-legal work for which legal training is good preparation, such as political leader, corporate executive, federal government administrator, investment reporter, lender, or entrepreneur.

Our clients value our capacity to understand-- as well as properly handle-- the interaction in between these needs. The difficulties our customers deal with do not fit with the synthetic boundaries of other law firms' practice groups.

Based out of Canada, Allied Lawyers is one of the fastest emerging global law practice, offering several high-profile customers. The company is in the expansion stage with offices now additionally in UAE, Iraq, and also China. In the context of worldwide law, it concentrates in varied locations, consisting of corporate and industrial segments, property, as well as worldwide trade as well as mediation.

According to this resource, as of 2003, there were 901 law office with more than 50 lawyers in the United States. Some nations, like Italy, regulate lawyers at the regional level, and a few, like Belgium, also control them at the regional level. In lots of nations, lawyers are family doctors that stand for clients in a broad area of legal matters. In others, there has actually been a propensity because the beginning of the 20th century for lawyers to specialize early in their professions. Some territories approve a "diploma advantage" to certain establishments, so that just earning a degree or credential from those institutions is the main qualification for exercising law.

Consequently, even conveyancer as well as business internal advise have to initially get a license to exercise, though they may in fact invest extremely little of their jobs in court. Failure to comply with such a rule is the criminal activity of unauthorized practice of law. In method, lawful jurisdictions exercise their right to establish that is acknowledged as being a lawyer. Because of this, the definition of the term "lawyer" might vary from location to place.

They ensure you obtain all that's best according to the law. You have to comprehend that not all of law company Alkmaar services can aid you out if you do. That is since not every one of these Alkmaar law office might provide you with the experience, rejuvenating, as well as proactive legal recommendations along with litigation.

What is considered big law firm?

Although the term “biglaw” is prone to some variance in usage, the most commonly accepted definitions would stipulate that a biglaw job involves working in a large firm (the definition of “large” can also vary; the minimum would be 101 attorneys or more) that pays attorneys the market rate for large firms (currently

With around 169 partners as well as 756 lawyers, the company offers a wide range of services ranging from competition, profession as well as regulative to tax law. Greenberg Traurig's Amsterdam workplace is house to more than 40 lawyers, tax consultants, as well as civil-law notaries. We suggest firms that are energetic both in the Netherlands in addition to internationally.

You can employ the solutions of lawyers in Alkmaar to possess claims collected. Seizures are imposed after an appointment with you by the attorney to make certain your financial obligation collection stand is clear.

#advocaat alkmaar #advocaten alkmaar #advocatenkantoor alkmaar #advocatenkantoren alkmaar #advocaten in alkmaar #advocatenbureau alkmaar #jurist alkmaar #advocatenkantoren noord holland #alkmaar juristen

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carpentry12-blog · 5 years

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Address : 233 Goffle Rd, Ridgewood, NJ 07450

Website: https://www.carpentryinnovationsnj.com/

Phone Number: (201) 945-1757

Mobile: (201) 945-1757

Business Email: [email protected]

Description:

Carpentry Innovations is a general contracting company specializing in kitchen and bathroom renovation, remodeling and home expansion. We at Carpentry Innovations provide quality craftsmanship built to look great and last. Our top of the line carpenters, tile setters, drywall, spackling and painting craftsmen provide a clean, neat job site and finish product of premium quality second to none. Over thirty years of experience in the home remodeling business with a proven track record and impeccable reputation makes us one of Bergen County's' finest renovation and remodeling contractors.

Business Hours: 8 am-6 pm

Social Profiles:

https://www.facebook.com/carpentryinnovations/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/steven-pizzollo-a588aa121

https://www.yelp.com/biz/carpentry-innovations-ridgewood

https://www.angieslist.com/companylist/us/nj/ridgewood/carpentry-innovations-reviews-3849725.htm

https://www.houzz.com/pro/slpizzollo/carpentry-innovations

Employees: 10-15

Year Established: 1989

Payment Methods: Visa, MC, Amex, Discover

#kitchen remodeling bathroom remodels finished basements deck construction new jersey NJ Ridgewood bergen county Allendale saddle river Carpe

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isakvaltrsen · 6 years

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Skam fic love fest | Day 6: Recommendations

I’ve read lost of wonderful evak fics. fics that made me cry. fics that made me laugh out loud. fics that i couldn’t stop reading until I was done. I’m happy to share my favorites (arranged by word count, ascending). I put a heart in front of those fics that are my absolute favorites.

before it's all too much by thekardemomme | “It's in the past, Even. You can keep it there if you want to.” | 1.6k

Take this lonely heart by Tchell1 |The tears would not stop. They had kept coming since Even realized what had happened. Even was not normal. His terrible brain would highjack his body and do with it whatever it wanted. Isak would never love him. Even couldn’t even blame him. Even was never able to love himself. | 1.7k

other lives and dimensions and finally a love poem by iphigenias | "Marry me," Isak says. Even almost drops the can of tuna he's holding. | 1.9k

The Study Buddy by wordsarelifealways/ @isaksredscarf | In this universe, Even meets Isak when he pours Red Bull into a black coffee at 7.15AM to cope with a morning class. Even's inner barista is horrified, but damn if the boy isn't cute. | 2k

Must Be Love on the Brain by flowerbedofsouls | On Thursday 8th, Isak follows his friends' advice and takes a bus to Even. | 2k

The Hot Muffin Thief by @bellakitse | There is a magical muffin at the café where Isak's buddy Jonas works. It's Isak's lifeline, he has it every day and then one day some hot art hipster steals his muffin. | 2.2k

you are a kaleidoscope by grinsekaetzchen | The first time Even sees Isak across the schoolyard, his own magic grips him so tight, he has to sit down to get it under control again. Still, he doesn’t stop looking at Isak. | 2.4k

when i’m close to you (we blend into my favourite colour) by Behindthecities/@vanqoh | the the 5 times Isak forgets that he’s not dating Even and the 1 time he does something about it. | 2.5k

kiss me thru the phone by kaleidxscope | Even always forget to turn on his Wi-Fi and he has the bad habit of replying his phone company's texts. | 2.6k

i'll paint the picture, let me set the scene by mmxii/@isakissyvaltersen | This might very well be the stupidest idea Isak has ever had. And he’s had his fair share of stupid ideas, so he knows what he’s talking about, okay. | 4k

Quidditch and liquorice wand kisses by @bellakitse | The first time Isak Valtersen meets Even Bech Næsheim the seven-year Ravenclaw chaser, it’s because the boy saves him from a bludger to the face. A Hogwarts AU | 4.2k

and you're the moon, i'm the water by gravinnen | turns out things like negative feelings and insecurities don't actually disappear by never talking about them to anyone ever and Isak's not too excited about that. time to face some fears. | 4.2k

it's going to rain on friday, the twenty-second of december by vesperthine | Isak has tried to tell him that there’s nothing to discuss ( – that mom isn’t well, that dad is a coward, that he just wants to forget everything about family and expected happiness and just leech off of theirs – ) but every time Even has gone quiet and looked down; looked so sad that the conversation has just died. Which he knows is a fatal blow ( – a communicative meltdown – ) that leads to everything that he wants to avoid; screaming and crying that reminds all too much of the things he just wants to forget. | 4.3k

new beginnings by skamz | Isak moves into his new place and meets his new neighbors, a boy named Even and Satine, his cat. | 5k

and so i happily concede, this is all i ask, this is all i need by lovedisak | Even is fucking owning this marriage proposal thing.(with a little help) | 5k

let's have a team talk by colazitron/ @fille-lioncelle | Even is out for some non-alcoholic gløgg with his friends when he catches sight of a pretty blond boy. His friends do what all good friends would: play matchmaker. | 5.2k

scanned the skies with rainbow eyes by imminentinertia/@skamskada | He closes his eyes for a while, listening to the gentle whooshing sounds the waves make on the wet sand. The seagulls and the geese squawk a little and from afar he can hear a child laughing.He can also hear the soft padding of feet on the sand. Not goose feet, human ones. Close by. | 5.2k

❤️Spaces Between Us by allyasavedtheday/@littlespooneven | A fix-it fic for Even's storyline in season 4. | 5.6k

In Haunted Attics by GayaIsANerd/ @greathalesonfire | Isak meets Even a little earlier, a little more broken, a lot more lonely. | 6k

let me count the ways by anathema/ @azirapha1e | The worst part, the humiliating part, is that he’d thought he was over all this.He had been. He hasn’t thought about any of it in months – but sometimes life fucks you over, and sometimes a boy you tried to kiss, a boy who pushed you away, shows up to your first-month-of-living-together party unannounced, and sometimes you end up bolting out of your own apartment to have a panic attack where nobody can see you. | 6k

Sju Minutter by nusmag | It’s a love exercise, Isak supposes, shoving two people in the small, dark room under the tribune for seven minutes at a time. | 6.1k

we've built a home by skamz | after a bad breakup, Isak moves in with his new roommate, Even. He tries not to fall for him, and fails. | 6.2k

Large Americano, Extra Milk and Sugar by daigina | It's almost Valentine's Day. Mikael has a new job. Even has a new crush and no courage. This makes for lots of pining Evens, frustrated Mikaels, and spilled coffee. | 6.5k

The Boy Who Likes Isak's Smile by wyoheartsmusic/ @julian-dahl | Isak is heartbroken and there is a boy who is very determined to make him smile. | 7.6k

❤️ open the pod bay doors by iriswests/ @juilawicker | Even's trying to write a script for his class, Isak happens to catch a glimpse of the shit show, and they fall in love over a story of parallel universes. | 8.4k

Fall for You by Sabeley | If Isak could just stop embarrassing himself in front of the ridiculously attractive guy in his psychology class, that would be great. | 9.1k

ride with me, i'll ride with you by skamz | In an ideal world, Isak would spend this ride sitting by himself at the back of the train. In the real world, however, he has to allow this stranger to sit next to him.(A stranger whose shoulder he soon finds himself falling asleep on.) | 9.2k

baby we've got new love by itjustkindahappened | Isak is hella fucking gay and desperately single, and Eskild wants to change that. Even just has a thing about timing. Coffee shop AU with an ironic amount of tea enthusiasm and a whole lot of pining. | 9.5k

a constant state of closeness by chevythunder/ @icelandcurry | It starts with a hug. | 9.7k

Love Me Harder by tech_ftw | In which accidentally being added to a group text has unexpected consequences. Like falling in love. | 9.8k

❤️hell yeah, you the shit (that's why you're my equivalent) by colazitron | Even can't keep it in his pants, or his heart.or: Sometimes your boyfriend proposes and you just really want to sit on his dick. | 10.3k

it's mostly butterflies by hippopotamus/ @evenshands | “I’ve told you before,” Isak says, without looking up at Even. “The modern world relies on science and technology, Even. There’s no place for magic, it’s dangerous and unnecessary.” Little does he know, Even’s a witch. | 11.7k

LØRDAG 10:38 by wyoheartsmusic | Isak tries to understand what's going on after Even leaves their hotel suite butt-naked. Or: It's Saturday, 03.12.16, 10:38 and some things are the same while others are a little different. | 12.4k

It's a Wonderful Life by kapplebougher | It's a Wonderful Life AU, where Even believes the world would be better off without his existence. With the help of an angel though, he comes to realize that just maybe - that may not be entirely true. | 13k

The Balloon Intervention by lovelycarcass | Even wants to get Isak's attention and the Balloon Squad decide to take matters into their own hands. | 13.3k

when your heart is bleeding, i'm coming to get you by cosetties | Isak doesn't exactly expect his hookup from last week to be the love advice columnist at the school newspaper he's working at. He also doesn't expect to fall even harder for him than he already has, which is a shame, really, since Even's crushing on someone else. | 13.5k

Never be the same by nofeartina | It starts with a bet - one of those really stupid ones: can they last an entire month without any kind of sex? It’s been 22 days – and Even is dying. | 14.2k

❤️Somewhere I’ve never been by MinilocIsland | The first time Even meets Jonas' best friend, nothing goes according to plan. | 14.6k

turn my blue heart to red by allyasavedtheday/@littlespooneven | Because we need a doctor au. | 16.5k

as if by magic (thoughts of you are gone) by hippopotamus/ @evenshands | Isak hates being the third wheel to his best friends, until that means he gets to sit next to a handsome stranger on a rollercoaster. | 16.6k

Sideways and Slantways by iriswests | Isak gets stuck in an elevator with the one person he's vowed never to speak to again. This eventually prompts a conversation long overdue, but not without the memories flooding his brain like a broken dam first. | 17.6k

And they were right in front of you the whole time by Ihavecoldhands | Isak and Even meet as children, but it takes them a while to become friends. It takes them a little longer to become more. | 18.3k

something in the language of trees by scarletbluebird | AU where Isak's job really was to be Even's friend. | 20.8k

Eight Count by bri_ness/ @brionbroadway | Isak is a dancer who is losing his passion. Right when his best friend, Eva, needs his help with her struggling dance company. But when the famous Even Bech Næsheim joins their company, Isak thinks he might find inspiration again. | 21k

All the climbing, all the falling by Alene/ @tristealven | Isak and Even never saw each other after that night at the Plaza. Five years later Isak studies molecular biology in Bergen and keeps running into someone tall and blond.It rains a lot, there are mountains to climb, and some things start to fall into place. | 21.8k

snow and dirty rain by grinsekaetzchen/ @hotchocolatenthusiast | In which Vilde starts a book club because someone else already started kosegruppa, Even is a book nerd, who recites poetry, and Isak struggles to see the point of reading boring books when he could just watch the film versions; except, that he meets Even, so maybe book club isn't that much of a waste of time as he's previously thought. | 23k

No Rain, No Roses by @fxckxxp | Science brains and art brains were meant to fall in love. Or: Isak and Even restore a house together and make it a home. | 23.2k

Let go when you give it by unsungyellowraincoat/ @isaksbestpillow | Isak is a tired biology student who has no time for love, he barely manages to take care of himself. Until two small dogs and a tall handsome stranger change all of that.Or Isak and Even meet at a dog park. | 23.5k

❤️i guess that's destiny doing it right by allyasavedtheday/@littlespooneven | the alternate universe where Even originally went to Nissen and became friends with Isak and Jonas when they started first year but moved away after his episode at the end of first year only for Isak to never hear from him again. Fastforward to the summer before Isak starts college when he’s travelling around Spain and bumps into a certain someone in Barcelona. | 26.4k

Dear Friend by bri_ness/ @brionbroadway | Isak and Even work together in a failing video store, and they cannot stand each other. Isak and Even both signed up for the Love Letters dating service, and they’re both falling for their anonymous pen pal. | 26.8k

please hurry leave me, i can't breathe by cosetties | For the first time in his goddamn life, Isak is focusing on himself. Trusting people, loving people, has never worked out well for him anyway. The last thing he needs is Even, who looks at him like he sees right through him, like Isak is worthy of something more. | 27.3k

❤️in better light, everything changes by TimeInABottle | Isak accidentally texts a stranger (Even) while trying to text Sana. | 31k

you're gonna sing the words wrong by strangetowns | In which Even is simultaneously the biggest loser and the hottest teenager on the planet, and Isak is simultaneously super gay and super pressed about it. Or: a marching band AU. | 32k

Guru Knows Best by StMisery | Isak grumps, and Eskild schemes. But it's all in the name of love. For their gorgeous new neighbour (and a little for each other too). Even moves into the apartment across the hall, and Isak's just trying to make it another day without dying of embarrassment. | 36.6k

❤️Play That Song by kapplebougher | Every day, Even catches a boy in a snapback who sneaks in to play the piano at the summer camp Even works at. Even's never seen him before. But if the boy's good looks hadn't already captivated him, then his phenomenal piano-playing ability certainly has. Even doesn't know much about love at first sight, but he thinks that this is pretty close. | 41k

Things Look Different in the Morning by allyasavedtheday/ @littlespooneven | In which Even needs a place to stay, kollektivet gains a new roommate, and Isak just really wants to sleep. | 46.8k

I'll Be Coming Home, Wait For Me by dahlstrom | The diner AU. Even and Yousef open a 1950s American-style restaurant together - Even is the creative genius in the kitchen, Yousef keeps the trains running on time, and Isak, Chris B, and Magnus are all along for the ride. Falling in love over food while Elvis serenades from the jukebox. Welcome to the Throwback Diner. | 47.9k

four movements on a first wedding by chevythunder/ @icelandcurry | Isak's spent years keeping his distance to Even, worried that any kind of closeness could trigger feelings he won't be able to suppress. Waking up married to Even after a blurry night in Las Vegas throws a slight wrench in those plans. | 48k

❤️Though our parts are slightly used by Teatrolley | Isak is pining for Jonas, and Even is pining for Mikael. Jonas and Mikael are dating. Isak and Even meet Or: Isak thinks love is a risk, and Even thinks it's tragedy. That's the beginning, anyway. | 54k

❤️a mental archive of love unwanted by chevythunder/ @icelandcurry | Even moves into a new flat, gains new friends and tries not to have his heart broken. He nails the first two. | 71k

❤️sua lumina; sidus series by shoulderbone/@odeto-psyche | What he wants to say, and cannot bring himself to admit: Before you there was no real me. Only a person pretending to be. Or, alternatively: Isak comes back to face death, and in the meantime, finds rebirth. | 101k

❤️with love, from anonymous by cosetties, iriswests | Isak just wants to get his coffee in peace, Even has a crush, and there's a secret admirer on the loose. | 136k

#sflf2018 #evak #isak x even #fic rec #skam fic love fest #my post #pls let me know if any of the links don't work #i worked on this list so long everything is blurry at this point #:D

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