#CSM Fic
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𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 ◞﹒୧ .
✧ ⁝ 𝐚𝐤𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐲𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚 ◞ ྀི
— my thoughts & headcanons on how i think he would be as a lover (or not...) fluff, nsfw, hurt.

𓍯 a silent lover. the type to love in secret, hidden from sight. cold facade, worried heart for his loved ones. you feel his affection in the little things like when you feel down and he always prepares your favorite meal without a word, trying to create comfort and affection that he can't express with words. a confession would be too loud for him.
𓍯 he prefers to watch, observe and protect those he cares about behind their backs. the type to lie to you about his schedule - because it's physically impossible for him to verbalize his feelings - and go secretly confront a devil who was giving you a hard time.
𓍯 aki loves to make love to you during rainy days, forehead pressed against yours, his breath brushing your lips. it's intimate, despite the fact he run away from any emotional intimacy. he can't say i love you with his mouth, makima's shadow covering his heart and his words but he can convey his feelings in his kisses, his hands that circle around your clit, touching in spots nobody did.
𓍯 his eyes that soften only for yours will always follow you, everywhere you're going.
𓍯 he spend his night looking at you when you're sleeping, wondering why God gave him such a gift in his life but not enough time to cherish it.
𓍯 you always felt it even though it was silent. he seemed so detached from you, always careful that his eyes didn't linger on you for too long - attempt failed, they always found you -, you had to squint, see the unsaid, and understand the innuendos to perceive the love he had for you.
𓍯 it takes time. it takes time to go from a cold look when judging a stranger, to the first nods, the first half-smiles that precede the softened glances. it took him time to get used to having someone who cares for him like you do. maybe it was complicated to accept the fact that he was finally the first choice for someone, and not the forgotten youngest of his family like he always was. your warm air when you saw him coming from afar felt weird for him, almost inappropriate. when you seemed too happy to see him he couldn't help but frown at how your eyes always looked illuminated for him. weird. almost inappropriate.
𓍯 it takes time, but the slight pang in his heart he feels every time he feels your affection for him is slowly starting to disappear. he can't be openly expressive like you, but he's starting to accept it. it takes time. his love is silent when yours is so loud that it becomes overwhelming and he feels like he doesn't deserve it.
𓍯 it's understandable, everyone is dying around him. he's the only one who hasn't lost his humanity yet and mourns the deaths of those who defend the people of this city. it touches him. death scares him so much that he can't allow himself to truly get attached to someone, it would be like welcoming someone with big arms for a hug with arms full of thorns. to engulf you, to make you dive with him. no, he can't. he really can't.
𓍯 it doesn't matter how his breath hitches every time he feels when your silhouette towers over him, your hips undulating in the most exquisite way, so eager to please him. he doesn't even need to guide you with his hands on your hips, it's already too good. it doesn't matter the almost painful but sweet feeling he has in his stomach when the lights are out with the only sounds being the creaking bed and your soft breath. he feels so safe with you, you make him so wanted that he starts to think that life might be worth living outside of his desire for revenge.
𓍯 but it doesn't matter, he can't say "i love you", the poor man doesn't even manage to smile normally. there's always an awkward look.
𓍯 he was so caught up in the curse of his family's vengeance that he had closed himself off from any relationship that went beyond the professional sphere. but... it was hard not to succumb to you. he couldn't give you the bright future and romance you deserved, but he could give you the remnants of his heart he had left. working with you, doing missions and hunting devils together, and sometimes, when you were a little too drunk, kisses on the neck that would slip into panting. no commitment. that was what he could offer you. he thought it would protect him from the loss of not putting a word on your relationship, like a wall for pain. he lied to himself so much. he was already madly in love, and if he were to lose you right now, it would be the end of him.
𓍯 it was up to you to decode if the hands that brushed you at night sought only for pleasure or for your heart, because even if for a moment, you would lose control of your emotions and let your love for him express itself, an "i love you" that should have remained hidden, he would not answer it.
𓍯 aki loves you too, that's a fact. but he wouldn't let you see it. he wasn't going to make the mistake of investing too much in a relationship that was inevitably going to go badly, and make you hope. you deserved better, he thought. you were his heaven in the hell that was the daily life of a devil hunter. so dear, so precious to him.
𓍯 𝐤𝐫𝐲𝐬
#𐙚 writings 𓍢ִ🌸˙#aki hayakawa#aki x reader#aki hayakawa x reader#aki x female reader#aki smut#aki headcanons#aki hayakawa headcanons#aki drabbles#aki hayakawa drabbles#aki hayakawa x you#aki hayakawa x y/n#hayakawa aki#csm#chainsaw man#csm fic#aki x y/n
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Like a Battering Ram

Aki, who's always selfless with you, always giving and never taking. You want to change that, you want him to use you for once. You want him to fuck you rough and hard and punishing and no, you don't want anything less.
tags: overstimulation, dom!Aki, pussy slapping, praise, pussy eating, roughhhhh play
pairing: Aki Hayakawa x Reader
Aki’s always been so accommodating to your needs ever since you first met, ever since you first fucked. During that initial stage when you were sort-of-kind-of-maybe dating, Aki would eat your pussy out in the car as soon as he picked you up at the end of your shift because, in his words, you needed it. It didn’t matter that any of your colleagues could have seen you like that, spread out on the backseat of Aki’s car, skirt pulled up to your stomach while you whimpered against Aki’s tongue on your clit. You were always terrified you’d get caught like that, maybe even fired. But the pleasure always won out when Aki would spread your wet folds apart and murmur out “Shhh baby, I know, I know. Just a little bit longer for me, ‘kay? I just want to get you nice and ready for when I drop you home.”
Of course you gave in, you could always hold out just a little longer with the promise of getting stretched out on Aki’s cock, right?
And then, after you two properly got together, Aki never slowed down even once. Always teasing, attentive, and making sure you could handle everything he’d give you. He was always so slow to prep you, knowing that the girth of his cock made you breathless and sometimes tense up. He loved how tight you were, the way your pussy would squeeze around his cock while you’d bite your lip and try not to wince. “Easy, princess. Just take a deep breath for me, yeah?” he’d whisper, reaching down to thumb at your clit while you bucked into his touch. He’d press gentle kisses into your neck while you relaxed around him, telling you what a good girl you’ve been for him.
Aki’s always been so good to you. Never rough or careless like some of the guys you’ve been with before have been. He’s always done his best to make sure he’s patient with you, make sure you’re enjoying yourself and that you’re feeling as good as he can make you. And of course, Aki’s always done his best to make sure that you cum. Even if it means he has to spend all night with his face between your thighs.
It’s great, really. Aki is, without a doubt, the best fuck and the best boyfriend you could have ever asked for. You remind him of this as much as you can. When you’re kissing him after he gets home late from the office, when he’s making breakfast and you wrap your arms around him from behind, pressing your lips against his nape in the way you know he loves, and after he’s fucked you through and through and all you can do is breathe out “I love you so fucking much, Aki” into the pillow.
Aki’s selfless when it comes to you, and that’s the problem.
You know he’s holding back, you can feel it when he fucks you and his hands come to wrap around your throat but pull away at the last minute, with Aki leaning down to kiss you instead. Even when you’ve asked for rougher, promising him that you really can take it, he holds your hips just that tad too gently and never lets his thrusts grow too erratic. He’s always so controlled, and for once, you just want to see him let loose. You want to see him take what he wants and use your body however he needs to.
It’s just… it’s a bit hard to keep asking for rougher when Aki’s idea of rough is gently running his nails down your chest. You want pain. Like the burn in your throat when you pinch one of his cigarettes and smoke it on the balcony late at night. You want him to split your pussy open, spend less time on relaxing you and more on ramming your cervix until you’re whimpering with a mix of pain and pleasure.
So, yeah. Asking for that is going to be difficult. You only know one other option that seems to get Aki riled up more than anything else: being the biggest fucking brat Aki’s ever had to deal with.
You never expected your plan to work, and you were completely right. It doesn’t.
Your problem is that you don’t really know how to act bratty. Not in a sexy way, at least. Everything you ask Aki for, he gives you. Mostly.
You start by leaving unwashed plates by the kitchen sink, your laundry on the bedroom floor. You catch Aki raising his eyebrows at you but other than that he says nothing. You wake up to find the dishes clean and the clothes all folded away, and of course, Aki pressed up against you in bed, leaving small kisses on your nape as he reminds you not to be late for work.
It’s a bit of a foil in your plan since you always remember Aki complaining about when he lived with Denji and Power, and just how damn shitty he was with their mess. He was all snappy and hard eyes, and for some ridiculous reason your horny brain said ‘please fuck me when you’re like this.’
But Aki doesn’t snap at you or get mad, in fact, he doesn’t even look remotely close to being frustrated. So you know you’ll have to keep brainstorming some stupidly wonderful ideas to bring out that roughness inside of him.
It finally happens when you take it a little bit too far. Well, you didn’t really think it’s that bad but Aki seems to think so.
Aki’s opened the balcony door, standing half-in while holding up an empty cigarette packet and waving it at you.
“Okay, look, baby, where are the rest of my cigarettes?” he asks.
“I finished them.” You don’t even skip a beat.
Aki goes silent for a moment and you wonder if he heard you, with the thrum of the washing machine in the background drowning out your voice. You repeat yourself, and a stupid part of yourself starts to feel excited. Is this it? Was this the way to go?
Aki glares at the ground and finally speaks. “Fuck, that was my last pack unless I left one in the dra-”
“Oh, I went through that as well. Sorry.” Yes, you threw them in the bin a bit too gleefully. He doesn’t have to know that though. And no, you’re not sorry at all. Your manners have long gone in this quest for rough sex.
He’s staring at you now, a bit annoyed and a bit confused. “You don’t even smoke though, not properly anyway, so why would you go through two packs in two whole fucking days? What are you, a chimney now? Have you been replaced by Himeno in my sleep?”
Yes. This is your chance. You shove your phone back on the kitchen counter and move towards Aki, grabbing him by his tie, pulling him from the balcony and shutting the door. He’s oddly pliant for someone who’s usually so stiff.
“Maybe I did, what’re you going to do about it?” you murmur, pressing your hands against his chest and raking down, feeling the heat of his body through his shirt. “Does it annoy you?”
“Yes,” Aki says, then winces, backtracks, and tries to say, “no, I mean, not really, I guess. Just my morning smoke, but I can run down to the store to grab more.”
“You’re not even a little bit annoyed at me?” you probe.
“Definitely not at you, baby.”
You frown. Your hands are still rubbing his shoulders when you say “well that’s a shame, I’ve been trying so hard to piss you off this whole month. I really thought that one would have done it.”
Aki looks confused. “And why have you been trying to do that? Wait, is that why you’ve been making a mess of everything? I thought you were just too tired after work to do the cleaning.” He groans, “and my cigarettes, was that…?”
You pull back from him and sigh, “Aki, I love you. You’re just so… good to me. Too good. I wanted you to get annoyed enough to fuck me, you know, angrily . You’re always so sweet to me, give me everything I could ever want. But I need you to be selfish sometimes, use me . I know you get so stressed working as a devil hunter and I guess I just want you to take some of that anger out on me.” Once the words start coming out they just can’t stop. You wanted this to be natural, not awkward and stumbling like you sound now.
Aki’s silent again, and you suddenly feel very dumb. You’ve done so much dumb shit for some stupid plan that doesn’t even make sense. You start to turn away, walk back to the bedroom to go hide in bed, in the shower, in the cupboard to pretend this never happened at all and-
Aki stops you, his hand gripping your shoulder hard. His voice is low when he speaks, “You could’ve just told me that you wanted it like that.” He pulls you back to him, hands pressed into your hips.
You glance up. “You would’ve been too gentle on me, you’re too kind like that.”
Aki snorts. “Not when I see how committed you are like this. You really want it that rough, huh?” He’s pushing at you now, leading you back to the bedroom without you even realising. “How rough do you think you can handle?”
Your back hits the mattress when he urges you down, pulling at your top to get it off. You let out a yelp when he slaps your thigh, clicking his tongue while he eases you out of your skirt too. “Too slow, get this rubbish out the way.”
It’s sudden and Aki’s hands are rough on your skin. You’re too excited seeing him like this. “I can take it all, I promise,” you tell him, reaching up to tug him on top of you. Your hands are cupping his jaw, tracing down his pretty face while he undoes your bra.
Aki pauses, grabbing your hand that’s touching him. “If it’s too much, tell me to stop.”
“Will you listen?”
“Not if you don’t want me to.”
And that’s enough to make your pussy wetter than it already is. Aki hasn’t bothered removing his own clothes yet, only yours. Your panties are still on and he leans down so he can mouth at your mound through the fabric, spreading your pussy lips until he can see the outline of your wet folds.
“Spread that pretty pussy for me, yeah, just like that, angel,” he murmurs, urging you to bring your own hands down beneath your panties while he presses his lips against you. It’s a teasing touch, just his breath ghosting against the fabric. You let out a soft whimper when Aki presses a finger up against your clit, rubbing it softly before pulling back. You whine at the loss of contact.
“Shhhh, you want me to be a little bit selfish now, right?” Aki asks, and you nod eagerly. “Then be a good girl and open that pretty mouth of yours for me, yeah, that’s right”, and then his long fingers are thumbing against your lips, pressing in to slide alongside your tongue. Your mouth is watering and yet he’s barely even doing anything to you.
“Get them wet for me, sweetheart. Show me how much you wish my fingers were my cock in your mouth.”
Yeah. You could die happily right now. You love the taste of Aki’s skin, the way his fingers press to the back of your throat and make you gag a bit, you feel just so full of him. Usually, if Aki hears you gag or choke, he pulls away and checks that you’re okay. Tonight that care seems to be gone, and your eyes water when Aki slips two more fingers into your mouth, groaning as he stretches your lips as though it’s his dick stuffed down your throat.
Your breathing is hard when Aki finally removes his fingers and all you can do is wait for his next demand. He’s turned on too, you know this for sure when you see his erection through his pants and reach out to palm him. Beneath Aki’s pants is that perfectly fat cock of his, leaking precum just for you. You want to suck his cock so fucking badly, you really do, but you’ll wait for Aki to decide when he wants that.
“Shift back up on the bed for me. And pull those panties down, I want to be able to eat that pussy properly, spread wide open for me, okay?” his voice is firm and no, he’s not really asking.
“A-Aki,” you say, “you know I love your tongue on me but… tonight’s meant to be about you.”
He gives you a sharp look, and tells you “I’m not going to go easy on you, princess. I just want to make sure your cunt’s all nice and overstimulated right before I stretch you out with my cock. That’s what you want, right?”
Yes, that’s exactly what you want. You nod and whimper, “Fuck, Aki… but what about-”
Aki leans in close and coos in your ear, “I want you shaking and crying by the time I finally fuck you. Want you so fucking tight for me that that you’re still cumming again and again when I fill you up.” He’s so close, words vibrating against your skin while he sucks at the soft skin of your neck. “Think you can do that for me, angel? That’s what I want.”
And how could you ever deny him? If that’s what Aki wants from you, you’ll happily give. You’ll let him tear as many orgasms out of you as he can, until you’re nothing but a drooling mess with your pussy clenching around his cock. Milking him, begging him to fill your empty, needy cunt full of his cum.
His hands are warm on your thighs when you move back to lean against the bedhead, strong fingers kneading your soft flesh while you shakily remove your panties and toss them onto the floor. You feel incredibly exposed like this, but you know Aki’s waiting so patiently for you to do as you’re told. You reach down and spread your soaked pussy lips, gasping slightly when your thumb brushes up against your sensitive clit.
“Fuck, baby, God, you’re so- fuck,” Aki sounds so choked up, but he’s leaning in between your legs, covering your fingers with his own so that he can spread you out even more. Gently pulling the hood of your clit back so that you can feel his warm breath where you’re so, so sensitive. You love this though, knowing that Aki’s the only one who’s able to see you like this, touch you like this.
“Good girl,” he whispers as he presses kisses up your thigh, lips getting closer and closer to your aching cunt. “Keep yourself open for me, like that,” he reminds you, and that’s the only warning you get before his tongue is lapping at your clit, sucking and ghosting his teeth over your sensitive little bud. Aki’s always been good at eating your cunt, but you swear he gets better every time he’s down there. Even when he’s just teasing you, it still feels better than anything or anyone else ever has.
“A-Aki,” you whine, reaching out to grasp his hair but find your hands getting pushed away, held down against the mattress. “Stop it,” he warns. Aki keeps you like that, moving his face further down your slick folds so that his nose is rubbing up against your clit while his tongue presses into your leaking hole. “S’ good, please, more,” you slur out, because you want his tongue in you, not just the little teasing circles he’s swiping around your entrance. You need something in you so badly. Even just the bridge of Aki’s nose against your clit is enough to make you feel you’re gonna build towards your release, and if you’re going to cum, you want to be filled with Aki. His tongue, his fingers, his cock. You’ll happily take any of those as long as you’re not empty.
He pulls back, grinning at you with his lips coated in your wetness, “Patience, baby. You’re meant to be letting me enjoy myself over here.” And then he’s back to it, his warm tongue pushing past your slick folds and into your cunt, thrusting in while using his other hand to reach up and play with your clit. He’s not as gentle this time and you love it. Aki’s tongue deep in your cunt while he rolls your spit-soaked clit between two fingers, something that usually might have been too much for you but now it’s perfect. And then when he brushes his thumb over your clit just like that, you can feel the tension in your belly grow stronger, stronger, until you’re whimpering and reaching up to pinch your own nipples just to get you on that edge.
Aki knows you so well. Too well. He doesn’t even have to glance up, instead, his voice is muffled against your cunt when he says “greedy fucking girl, go on then, cum for me for the first time tonight, sweetheart,” and that’s all you need. You pinch your nipples hard enough to almost bruise them, whining and squirming as your cunt clenches around Aki’s tongue, trying to draw him in further while your soaked pussy lets out a bit of squirt. Aki keeps his fingers on your clit the whole time, helping you ride out your orgasm while he laps up your juices with his tongue.
When he finally pulls himself away from your cunt, you’re a whole fucking mess. Your cunt is still pulsing and you can barely breathe but fuck- you want more. So much more. You don’t even realise you’re saying it until Aki grabs your shaky legs, pulls them over his shoulder and asks you “what made you think I was gonna stop there?” His cock isn’t even out, and you really don’t understand why until a light smack comes down on your wet pussy.
“Fuck, Aki!” you cry, your overstimulated clit taking the full brunt of Aki’s slap. It stings lightly, and you can tell Aki’s trying to read your face to know if this is too much for you, but it’s not. You whine and spread your cunt for me, begging Aki to slap your puffy pussy lips again. It’s not enough to make you cum, but just the rhythm of his hand lightly slapping your cunt gets that warm feeling in your belly growing again. He starts light, then gradually the slaps get harsher. Not quite painful but enough to make you yelp, still spreading your pussy lips for him while you wait for the smack to come down against your clit.
“Shit,” Aki breathes, and you can see the bulge in his pants now, can feel it pressing up against the inside of your thigh, grinding slowly. “You’re doing so well for me, really didn’t think you’d be able to take this much” he tells you, pulling his hand back to unzip his pants. You don’t even care about the stinging sensation of your cunt, all you can do is watch as Aki strips for you, shirt off first, pants and briefs gone next.
You’ve always adored every part of Aki; his pretty face, his lightly-toned figure, his crap sense of humour and of course, his OCD cleaning routine that quite literally clashes with your hoarding routine. But fuck, his cock is fucking perfect for you. He’s thick as fuck, more than girthy enough to stretch your tight cunt out and make you gasp, but not too long to the point where it hurts. Aki’s cock was made for pounding you, always hitting the right spots and making you tear up when you cum on him. You reach out to palm him, wanting to feel the pre-cum he’s leaking in your hand but he slaps you away again.
“Stop that. What did I say?” Aki slurs, eyes heavy as he presses his cock up against your swollen entrance, “patience, angel. I’ll only give it to you if you’re good for me.” And that’s a big fucking lie. He really should be making you wait but no, Aki’s already pushing in, making you tense up at the stretch and gasp for air. He was right, you’re way too overstimulated to take him with any sort of ease. Your cunt tightens around him as he stretches you out, making you whimper while he whispers into your ear “shhhh, you’re alright, baby. I know, just relax. Let me make you feel good.” You trust him on that, Aki always knows how to make you feel good.
Aki stills, cups your face, and says “I won’t make it hurt, not too much anyway. Only as much as you can take.”
You try to nod shakily at him when he’s most of the way in, “please Aki, s’ good now, I need it,” you whine, bucking your hips up to get him in just a little deeper. You can handle it. The only problem is with your legs around Aki’s shoulders, you don’t really have much room to take control. It’s all up to Aki, and so far he’s only rewarding you with shallow thrusts, glancing down at where his cock is splitting you open.
“You’re so fucking greedy,” he says, and it’s sudden, but he almost pulls out all the way, only to slam back into your cunt harder, and harder again. You’re so sensitive, you’re pussy clenching and tightening up every time Aki fucks you, hits the sensitive spot inside you that makes you gasp, struggling to breathe. Your pussy was already a tiny bit sore but now it’s aching, for more, less, maybe both.
“You can take more, baby, I know you can,” Aki says, voice raspy against your neck. And then he’s biting down, sucking at your neck hard enough to leave marks that’ll last for days. Your collarbone, the side of your throat, your jaw, Aki bites at any skin you will offer him. It’s all so much and with Aki’s thick cock inside you, it’s the only thing you could ever want. You feel brainless, just letting Aki use you until he’s done fucking your overstimulated cunt. You feel like your cunt was made purely for him to use.
Of course, you don’t even object when Aki lightly slaps you on the jaw, telling you to “open wide, need you to suck my fingers, pretty girl.” That’s exactly what you do, letting your mouth fall open while Aki presses his thumb against your lower lip, guiding in while ramming your pussy at the same time. You moan around his fingers, almost choking on your own saliva when his cock starts hitting your sweet spot over and over. The way your cunt wraps around his cock was enough to make you almost cry, but now that he’s pressing up against your g-spot, all you can do is whimper and suck desperately on his fingers.
“I’m gonna-”, fuck, you can’t even talk like this. Mouth and pussy both so full of Aki. “I’m gonna cum, please- yes, please-” it’s all you can get out, and you don’t care how pathetic you sound all choked up like this. “Need to cum, I- please, need to cum on your cock, Aki-” and he doesn’t slow down at all. Just continues splitting your abused pussy open, head of his cock rubbing up against your sweet spot hard until you’re crying and squirting around him, drool spilling down your lips while he fucks you through your orgasm hard and fast.
Your cunt twitches as Aki continues to fuck you even after, the aftershocks of your orgasm hitting you even as his thrusts grow erratic, his fingers in your mouth pressing at the back of your throat sloppily while you try not to wince. It’s too much and a part of you feels like you might cum again, but you doubt you’d be able to handle it even if you can.
That all changes though when Aki reaches down to rub at your clit, his fingers gently rubbing your abused little nub.
“Come on, I know you can give me one more, right?” Aki breathes into your ear, “You’ve been such a good fucking girl, you deserve just one more reward, princess.” It’s not fair, you think. Aki’s been fucking you rough and hard, his hair stuck to his forehead with sweat and yet he still sounds so much more composed than you. It’s not fair that he still has the coordination to rub your clit until he’s tugging a third orgasm from you tonight. All you can do is whine, grasp at the bedsheets while you cunt pulses around Aki again and again, soft whimpers leaving your lips as Aki finally reaches his own finish.
“Fuck, baby, you’ve done so well tonight,” Aki gasps, his breath hard against your neck. You can feel the way his body tightens and relaxes, fucks you once, twice, three times, before lazily thrusting up into your cunt while he spills inside you, pushing his cum back in your hole before finally pulling out. You don’t have the energy to do anything other than lie back and try to breathe, you don’t even give a shit that Aki’s cum is leaking out of your puffy pussy, you’re too tired and nothing matters.
You’re vaguely aware of Aki moving about, leaving the bedroom to get something, probably coffee, cigarettes, maybe both. He comes back with water for you instead though, handing you a glass while you smile up at him. Or try to anyway, you’re pretty sure even your facial muscles are gone at this point.
Aki leans down to kiss your forehead, asking, “was that rough enough for you? Too much?”
You want to laugh but can’t because as usual, Aki outperforms everything you could have ever wanted. Except, “next time, I want you to make me choke on your cock. You used my pussy, so how about my throat or ass next time?”
Aki sighs, leans down kiss your neck and says “well then, I guess we’ll have to try, God, you really are a greedy girl.”
Yeah, you won’t deny that either.
#aki hayakawa#chainsaw man#aki x reader#csm x reader#aki hayakawa x reader#aki hayakawa x y/n#aki brainrot#aki smut#aki hayakawa smut#anime x reader#aki thirst#csm fic
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aki can always tell when you used his hair tie.
it was something that he noticed, though, only after he realized that your perfume still lingered on him, although you hadn't sprayed any before blearily seeing him out that morning.
he had noticed then the perfume came from the hairtie on his wrist and that by now it had taken residence also in his own hair, so that each time a bit of his bangs would fall onto his face, he'd get a whiff that reminded him of you.
he was also quick to figure out how your perfume ended on his hairtie: you did spray your perfume on your wrists and behind your ears mostly and you'd oftentimes forget the hairties on your wrists, inevitably splashing them with the softspoken and sweet concotion that got aki heady each time his face was propped in the crook of your neck.
he thought that although it had been accidental, now his hairties were stolen far too often, coming back smelling like you.
not that he minded it any bit.
#this is reinforced because I wore my valentino perfume at work and got complimented by the cleaning lady#but that shit is truly strong af#like I found it on my scrunchie the night I went to sleep and the following day#after I had showered#Aki Hayakawa x Reader#Aki Hayakawa Fic#Aki Hayakawa x Y/N#Aki Hayakawa x You#aki hayakawa x reader#aki hayakawa x y/n#aki hayakawa x you#aki hayakawa fic#CSM x Reader#CSM Fic#CSM x You#CSM x Y/N#csm x reader#csm x y/N#csm x you#csm fic
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CSM Tokyo ghoul AU! i did some mask designs for Aki and Denji
you should go and read Oblivion On Your Heels by @mistystarshine to see when they get them! :DDD this au is so good and actually you should read every part of it here
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織姫

cw. f!reader (afab), canon divergent, manga spoilers, established relationship, dissociation, canon-typical violence, non-linear storytelling
pairing. makima x reader
notes. part of the man is a blazing star universe so i would give the two previous fics a read before diving into this one as it is key to understanding everything here. in a way, orihime 「織姫」 is a love letter to what was originally a duology so i hope old readers enjoy spotting the references! i had a lot of fun experimenting with detailing, when not to use it and even when only relying on only dialogue to carry a scene and i hope the payoff works in my favor.

Dawn is a time of day you appreciate more when you don’t have work.
While you ordinarily complained how the hours in those days vanished before you could enjoy them, dawn has always been the exception. Your early mornings have always moved slower compared to the rest. It’s a slow, quiet whisper you value fully, especially now as you enjoy the sound of the waves as you walk your assorted mix of pets on the beach. You’re sure the two of you look like quite the pair with your seven dogs on their leashes and one of your two cats in a leashed harness.
Makima is a woman bathed in the light of dawn.
You release a sigh of satisfaction, watching your girlfriend go ahead of you as your dogs stretch their legs.
It’s in how the morning rays dapple her form in near perfect circles. In the hues of her pale carmine hair that cascades across her bare skin. It’s even in the gold of her eyes, much like the yellow sun that peeks through the horizon.
It’s strange to think that this time two years ago, Makima had been a colleague you couldn’t stand to be around. Now you’ve willingly allowed a string of fate the exact shade as her hair to bind you both in the most irrevocable of ways.
“I won’t use my power on you, in exchange, we have to stay together forever. We’ll eat a lot together, sleep together, and live a happy life together.”
The contract of a lifetime ー marriage in its own right.
Gone are the days of patrols, weapons and putting your life on the line to ensure the safety of the general populace.
How peculiar this entire journey has been.
You will never pretend your reasons for joining the Bureau were pure of heart; you’d never dreamed of glory or protecting others.
For Makima, you’d gladly put your entire being on the line.
It goes against the nature of the Control Devil to have equal relationships.
Makima has one with you.
Moral ambiguities be damned. I believe in you. It’s a vow you know you will take to your grave as you watch your lover pause, wondering what has caught her excitable dogs’ eyes. Bagheera’s crooked tail tip twitches in interest, bounding forward with clumsy footsteps and you chuckle as you increase your pace so the cat can see it too. Tora, on the other hand, is comfortable in her backpack carrier. This is how mornings are done in your family. “What’s got the troublesome octet so excited?”
“They’ve found a crab,” her voice is amused and mellifluous. Crab sounds like a wonderful idea for dinner and you’re sure she has the same idea when you hear dulcet giggles slip from her person. Like a child, Makima turns to face you with her lips stretched into a delighted smile.
It’s then that carmine suddenly becomes jet and there’s a mole underneath her left eye that wasn’t there before.
Ah.
“[First], I want crab for dinner!” Nayuta beams brightly.
“Damn you have expensive taste,” you tease in spite of your stupor. Right. Those memories aren’t mine.
The dogs you walk remain but all but two of five of them are different from the seven you could have sworn were with you just a moment ago. Bagheera isn’t with you either, succumbing to his health issues years ago when you were still a child. All that remains of the cats you adopted is Tora, an old lady you left at home to snore on the couch with the Power's new kitten.
“Have ‘em,” Himeno told you shortly after you moved in with her in the quiet town of Shonai. “They were yours anyway. Oh, but Meowy’s always been Power’s.”
The ringed eyes are the only part of Nayuta that is the same as the woman from your memories. The eyes and the braid you know she'll twist her hair into later.
You wish the image of that woman would disappear.
Thankfully Nayuta is seemingly unaware of your dilemma. “I’ll get some in a few checks,” you promise and you receive an impish grin in return. You smile instinctively, your earlier troubles assuaged.
It’s a magic only Nayuta possesses.
The magic is disturbed when one of the dogs yelps in pain and Nayuta guffaws at the display of a small crab latched onto its nose.
You wonder if you had grown up surrounded by humans if you would find her reaction unsettling. As one raised among devils and fiends, however, Nayuta’s reaction is only standard even as she yanks the crab away with ease and tosses it into a returning wave. “That’ll teach you not to play with crabs,” Nayuta laughter subsides into chuckles as she pets the pup’s head.
You love the dawn.
How the wind runs its invisible fingers through Nayuta's hair much like a musician strumming the strings of a harp.
How the light of the sun crests Nayuta's head much like a halo although you're sure the god of such beings will likely you spurn you for the comparison. How ironic that a devil is the closest comparison you have to the opposing pole.
When it’s like this, it’s easy to pretend you and Nayuta are the last ones on earth on this beach.
There are no devil hunters, no other humans and there are no other devils either.
You digress that the truth of your reality is fine, however.
You work 6 out of 7 days in a week at a local convenience store all the while Nayuta pursues a degree through online courses at Tohoku University. Himeno goes to the pub once or twice every other week to indulge in the non-alcoholic beverages her sister allows her to drink. Even Power somehow manages a steady job helping Ichika sell the vegetables she grows in the garden. A well-placed hat and even a Fiend can blend in to some extent.
Work is limited for a Fiend in hiding from the government.
Everything is limited when it’s the Control Devil remaining out of the government’s sight.
“Do you ever wish you could actually go on campus?”
“Not particularly.”
Nayuta’s never really been a people person though, so you suppose it truly doesn’t matter to her whether she can physically attend Tohoku or not. So you subsequently deduce that she likely won’t care that she’ll be limited to working remotely for the rest of her life either.
Nayuta fingers dug into the back of your shirt, body tense. Her abilities required she believe one was lesser than her for her to order them, that was impossible when you were both scared out of your wits cornered with nowhere to go.
The woman kept an eye on you both, weapon drawn in one hand, phone in the other. “I found the C-”
Unwittingly, your mind drifts back to the red-haired woman as you watch the loose strands of Nayuta’s hair dance in the wind. Makima.
You don’t know much about the previous incarnation of the Control Devil save for what tidbits you allowed Himeno and Kishibe to tell you. Himeno did her best to sugarcoat it but blunt as Kishibe was, you know for certain that Makima wasn’t the kindest individual.
“ー kept her on a tight leash when she was alive,” the drunkard raised his flask to his lips for the tenth time in the three minutes. Every fiber of your being burns with a hatred for a man that isn’t wholly your own at the comment. “But even with that leash, she was a ticking time bomb. So keep this one on a leash that’s even tighter. Otherwise, she’ll turn out like Makima again.”
Makima is Makima, Nayuta is Nayuta.
ー is ー, you’re you.
“Hey, Nayuta, pick a country,” you call for the one you love. The one you love. The proof is when she turns and Nayuta is all that remains. You don't hate Makima. You don’t think it’s possible to hate any incarnation of the Control Devil. But Makima is who ー loved and their sun had long since fallen. “One that doesn’t have a devil hunting association in it.”
“Seychelles,” Nayuta doesn’t miss a beat, grinning the devilish grin you adore all the while. “We still need to have our honeymoon.”
A dirty sheet turned into a veil rests on jet black hair while you recited your on-the-fly vows.
“Yeah,” you chuff as you rest your hands in your pocket. “I owe you one, huh?”
A honeymoon and the whole wedding too.
ー
“What’s this new job of yours again?”
“I got a gig cashiering the next town over,” you pinch the green collar of your uniform as a physical display of your employment.
Himeno’s one eye closes as she hums thoughtfully into her mug, “what about your job at the konbini?” Her smile is as plastered as wet cement.
“It doesn’t pay as much,” you shrug. It isn’t the first time Himeno has made some sort of stir about your sudden change in employment, it likely won’t be the last. “If I’m gonna get paid to kiss ass all day, I at least wanna get paid more than chump change.”
“You make chump change as a cashier no matter where you work,” you choose to ignore Himeno’s comment. When her sister’s sharp stare of disapproval lands on the former devil hunter, you know the conversation will be dropped for now. Thanks, Ichika.
Ichika smiles kindly, always a touch too gentle and understanding. It’s easy to appreciate the woman’s soft-hearted nature. “Well, I for one, am glad you have a pay raise even if it’s somewhere else,” the dark-haired woman tells you. “We both are,” her soft blue eyes dare her sister to disagree with her sentiments. Himeno is smart enough not to voice against them. Gentle as Ichika is, Himeno will always crumble at the threat of her anger. “What time will you be home? We should eat something special to celebrate!”
“Crab sound good this weekend?” At your suggestion, Nayuta perks with interest for the first time since breakfast began. You bump your knees together lightly. With what you’ll be making now, you can afford to buy her crab every night. “I can pick some up before I head back after my last shift of the week.”
On the other side of the table, Power is just as interested in the suggestion. “Crab,” the horned woman inquires with a fiendish grin. “Finally something worthy of my taste buds! Servant,” the Blood Fiend’s strawberry-colored locks whip around in her excitement. It’s only barely doused by the unamused look Himeno shoots in her direction. Barely. “Human,” an improvement. “Make a crab dish for us!”
Ichika takes Power’s demands in stride, “I think crab would be a nice treat. Don’t you?”
Matching blue gazes share a quiet conversation before Himeno relents with a tired smile, “I guess crab isn’t that bad an idea.”
Power guffaws with prideful glee as Nayuta’s expression twists into impish satisfaction. Her few-weeks-old dream of crab will finally be fulfilled. A peaceful glow washes over you as you take in the sight of her drinking miso soup from a finely polished bowl.
Himeno’s house is a far cry from the abandoned building you both once called home.
The wooden floor is clean, not dirtied from even filthier shoes and haphazardly drawn images made with sharp rocks used as chalk. In this house, you have three meals a day. The limit to what you can take is no longer reduced to only what you’re able to carry.
It’s a life you always dreamed you’d one day share.
Although admittedly you never accounted for the additional humanoid bodies living in it.
“Well, I gotta get goin’,” you slurp the last of your black tea before wiping your lips with the back of your hand. “See you guys later,” you stack your dishes neatly atop one another, waving off Ichika’s attempt to take them from you. “See you later,” you tell Nayuta warmly, pressing your lips against hers for only a moment to spare yourself from feeling one of Power’s dirty napkins hitting your shoulder. “Have a good day at school.”
“Call me for lunch,” to the untrained ear, it’s a demand. To one as experienced as yourself in the language of Nayuta, it’s a request.
It’s an uncannily peaceful morning for a household of humans, fiends and devils. One that religious zealots would lose their minds over.
On an ordinary morning you yearn for the comfort of your and Nayuta’s bed and letting the hours roll by as you embark on your quest for work. This time, your stomach twists with discomfort as you hit the freeway.
It’s nearly an ordinary morning.
As you promptly pass the exit that actually would have led to the town next door, you know the last chance for ‘ordinary’ has sailed. The nearly three hours long drive it takes to get to Sendai is long enough for you to stew in your guilt. You park inconspicuously near the woodsy outskirts of the city, thumbs resting on the steering wheel.
It’s too late to turn back now, you remind yourself. I’m doing this for us.
Two adult passports.
Visas.
Housing.
Food.
Permanent Residency.
You’d never be able to save for it all with the chump change you’d been making at the local konbini. Nor would Nayuta ever be able to live a free life under the restrictions placed on you by those who took you in. There is no major country in the world Nayuta can be free in.
Nayuta had been a stranger, once upon a time. A stranger who never existed in your conscience and whose life you never perceived.
Then your eyes met and you experienced the birth of a universe.
You’ll gladly put your entire being on the line.
“Do you want to protect Nayuta?” Your grip tightens for a moment longer before finally reaching for the duffle bag you hid underneath the passenger seat.
“Well yeah, obviously.”
“Then follow two rules. Stay away from major cities and don’t join the Public Safety Devil Hunters.”
You've technically broken only one of Kishibe’s rules.
ー
Your parents used to take the first day of school very seriously.
It was always a momentous time when you went up a grade level. Photos were snapped constantly and after the first day ended successfully, there’d always be some sort of celebratory dinner. When you saw Ichika tearfully take in yours and Nayuta’s uniforms, you can tell things in this household were going to go the same way.
“The two of you are starting to become young women,” she smiled sappily, polaroid camera already in hand. “It feels like it was only yesterday you two came here and now you’re already going to school! You’re both so beautiful!”
Nayuta certainly was, you wanted to say. Her chin-length black hair now stretched to the upper middle of her back, framing her gold-colored eyes perfectly. But that would only make Ichika gush further about how you both were equally gorgeous like a proud mother.
You’d have thought you and Nayuta were infants when you were brought to this house with how Ichika coo’d and aww’d. Except the two of you were already thirteen when you’d come to the Nagano household and a year later, the school term had been going on for a few months. It had been unclear if you’d be starting high school or being held back. Donned in the dark brown uniform of Higashi Middle School, you knew the answer.
Even Power had on a uniform, refusing to be left out of the celebrations.
“That’s right, our little women,” Himeno laughed, holding an energy drink like it was a beer can. “Smile for the camera!”
You were able to turn the corners of your lips into a smile but, if anything, Nayuta’s scowl only deepened.
“Nayuta,” Himeno sighed in frustration. “I know you’re upset that you and [First] are in different classes but we’ve been through this. It’ll be good for you. Ichika,” she looked to her sister for support, blue eyes pleading. “back me up on this.”
Nagano Younger placed the camera down with an empathetic smile, “don’t you want to make friends?”
Ringed yellow eyes practically glowed as Nayuta sharply looked at the woman, “what do we need friends for? All [First] needs is me.”
The Nagano sisters shared a look that was a mixture of concern and exasperation. The primary debate of the weekend had finally reared its ugly head just before you were due to leave. Before either of them could say anything to placate their youngest ward, however, Power's manic laughter filled the air. When she had her fill of amusement, she rubbed the bottom of her nose as her laughs faded into chuckles. “The Great Power was once this immature,” Once? “Nayuta!” She points a sharp nail in the direction of the only other non-human in the house. “Stop behaving like a child! You’re reflecting poorly on my teachings!”
“Bark like a dog.”
Power dropped on all fours and barked the moment the demand left Nayuta’s mouth. The actual dogs in the house went into an excited frenzy, barking alongside with her.
“What did I tell you about taking your powers out on people because you’re upset,” all hints of playfulness left Himeno’s body in favor of displeasure. “Nayuta,” she placed her energy drink on the table at the young devil’s silence. Ichika sighed quietly, placing her camera down before she quietly turned to the kitchen.
“The two of you need to learn how to interact with people. Outside of the house,” the former devil hunter took a glance at the barking fiend. When she sighed, you knew Himeno likely thought that even the interactions within the house needed some work. “Now hurry up and turn Power back.” Nayuta directed her gaze to the nearest window instead. “Nayuta, I’m not asking.”
“Just wait a moment,” Ichika’s lark-like voice rang from where she went about her business. Hurriedly, she arrived with two bowls of ice cream in hand. With her sharp sense of smell, it captured Nayuta’s attention immediately and she held out her hands expectantly. “Don’t you have something you need to do first, young lady?”
Nayuta blinked, seemingly confused as she followed her gaze to where Power crawled on the floor. In the blink of an eye, the barking stopped. “Thank you,” Ichika nodded in satisfaction before she finally handed you both a bowl each, winking at you knowingly.
Power returned to her feet, cheeks hot with anger but whatever she was going to say, she stopped in her tracks the moment you held the bowl of ice cream Ichika gave you directly under her nose. It only took a beat before the Blood Fiend grinned, lifting the bowl as if it's her newest kill. “Gahahaha! I suppose I can accept your humble offerings,” you snorted quietly at the display. If anyone was the child in this house, it was her.
Himeno threaded her fingers through gray and navy blue hair with a whiny sigh, “everyone in this house wants me to age, Ichika. And we can’t just use ice cream to bribe her into behaving! Why does she get ice cream if I don’t get to keep beer!”
“Because your doctor said to either quit or be placed on a liver transplant list so you’d have a head start,” Himeno withered under her sister’s less-than-amused glare. “And I hope you savor that energy drink. Remember what we agreed on - one can per month.”
“And it’s always the smallest size possible,” Himeno grumbled, looking much like a child herself. If you hadn’t known who the older sister was, you would have assumed otherwise. “And low in sugar so it tastes absolutely disgusting.”
Ichika ignored the jab, knowing her sister would drink the disgusting low-sugar drink regardless. “Nayuta,” she began thoughtfully. “I know how important it was for you that you and [First] be in the same class. But there are going to be times when you have to interact with other people and we want you to be able to navigate those times with ease. There are going to be more opportunities for you both to be in the same class, we just want you to be okay with times where you aren’t.” When Ichika looked to you for assistance, Nayuta’s golden gaze turned to you as well.
We can socialize and be in the same class at the same time, can’t we? Truthfully, you hadn’t been thrilled with the class assignments either. It had been you against the world before you met Nayuta when you were left alone on the streets of Beijing. Not knowing what would happen to you with your parents gone, school didn’t seem all too important. You think you might have liked school, you truthfully can’t remember. You even had friends, good friends. You couldn’t seem to remember their faces either. Too much had happened to hold onto those memories.
The last time you’d been in school, you were seven.
It took a fair bit of home study for you and Nayuta to be ready for even middle school. If you had to go to school again, you wanted it to be by each other’s side. The school administration had different thoughts, it seemed. But underneath Ichika’s hopeful eyes, you couldn’t bring yourself to spurn her goodwill. You liked Ichika, she was kind. “If we’re in different classes, we can go on dates for lunch. And I can walk you to class each day, like in the movies.”
It’s only when she heard those words that Nayuta looked even remotely enthused about your separation.
“See?” Ichika’s smile widened in her appreciation.
“Alright,” Nayuta leaned against you, not entirely pleased but no longer entirely upset.
It was a solid victory as far as Ichika was concerned.
The rest of the morning went smoothly. Nayuta and Power indulged in their ice cream and when they were finished, Ichika indulged in getting her celebratory photo. Power held her peace sign while yours and Nayuta’s arms were linked tightly. Lunches packed and promises of an extravagant dinner made, the two of you finally left home hand in hand.
ー
“I know damn well that a Fish Devil costs more than that,” you scowl at your employer. “I didn’t drive over two hours to Sendai for you to stiff me on the price. I’ll take this to Yamaguchi if I have to.” That’s the problem with these underground devil hunting jobs. If someone wants to short change you, they will short change you. It’s been five months since you’ve begun your dealings with Nishida and the oaf never ceases trying to pull the wool over your eyes.
“Come on now, [Last],” the slimy businessman raises his hands as if placating a child. He looks more like a Pimp Named Slickback with his crinkled purple suit than someone who works in devil hunting. You suppose one working under the table can’t complain. “We’re old friends, aren’t we?”
“Tell me that when we’ve known each other for a decade,” you point your gloved finger against the desk two, three, four times. Each thudding strongly against the tabletop rattling the bloody axe you’ve placed on it. “550,000 yen. I don’t want even a decimal less.”
Nishida’s lips curl in dismay, “have I ever told you that you’re a real bitch to work with?”
You’ll continue to be one until you’ve gathered all you could, “acknowledgement from the queen of bitches is a real honor. I want my check.”
He rolls his eyes and calls you a few more choice swears under his breath, but he finally complies in writing a check with the correct amount. If you had been anyone else, perhaps Nishida could have paid you the 230,000 yen without issue. Perhaps you’d have even considered that a steal. Your training under Kishibe and Himeno taught you more about pricing devils than you were prepared to admit.
What are the ethics to killing devils when you are dating one?
You decide to follow the devil code of ethics. Kill or be killed, it’s that simple.
It’s never been a question if Nayuta would spurn you for such acts if she were to ever learn of them. It’s the fact you know Nayuta would follow you to Sendai in a heartbeat.
“I found the C-”
You will never bring those unfinished words to reality.
Carefully you remove the gloves on your hands to even more carefully extract your wallet from the ziplock bag you keep it in, placing your check within its pockets. Then you tuck it all away once more before donning a clean pair of gloves instead.
“Ugh, I’m getting hot just looking at you,” Nishida groans, eying you as if you were equal parts insane and excessive. You wonder if he’ll ever get used to the lengths you go to make sure no trace of blood and the smells of other devils touch your person. You don’t even put your axe in the car, it hasn’t been there since it had been a new purchase. No, you keep the rusting thing right here in Nishida’s crappy building in Sendai’s slums.
Trying to hide something from Nayuta’s nose is like trying to rob a bank blindfolded. “I told you already, I don’t want the blood getting on me. Killing devils is gross,” you wave the man off. Five months you’ve been doing this and you haven’t slipped up yet. Your ritual is the same each time ー before you start hunting, you dress in what is practically a glorified hazmat suit. Once work is done, you take it all off with gloves covering your hands and dump it in the trash.”
“It just seems like a lot of hassle,” Nishida scratches the back of his head, nonplussed. “If this ever gets in the way of your job, don’t come crying to me.”
“This coming from the man who doesn’t do the hunting himself is crazy,” you click your tongue in unsurprised annoyance. If it means keeping your proclivities a secret from the house, you’ll wear the hazmats again and again. “I’m not coming in tomorrow, I have a date with my girlfriend. Something you know nothing about. Well, you did. Until about a month ago, right?”
The look on Nishida’s face almost makes you feel better about his attempt to scam you. Almost. “Just go home before I decide to take my offers of employment elsewhere!”
You chortle with pleasure as you finally exit his dusty office.
When you arrive home, the wind must have blown your scent through the door or a cracked window because you walk into Makima’s arms the moment you pass through the door. “Welcome home, [First],” Makima greets you adoringly, red tresses brushing against your jaw. Her arms are as warm as her voice, wrapped around you as loose as one called the Control Devil will allow.
It’s instinctive, how quickly you return the embrace. “That professor finally off your ass?” Strange. Since when has Makima been a student?
Nayuta pulls away from you slightly, just enough to look you in the eye as you converse. Nayuta is the student, you remember. Business management is what she studies. “I don’t know why he-” Nayuta blinks as she takes all of your visuals in. “[First], what’s wrong?”
Your smile falters, “it’s nothing, I’m just tired.” Tired of the memories that don’t belong to you. “Management just really loves working their best employee.” You’re happy tonight is Himeno and Ichika’s pub night where they never drink alcohol but do engage in the card games with the locals. Himeno’s been trying to catch in the midst of a lie you’re sure no one can detect.
“Want me to talk to them then?” Nayuta is too quick to offer her services. I’m earning more than enough now. “I’ll get you a manager’s salary too.”
“Nah,” you shake your head. “I just want it to be tomorrow for our date already.” You’ll be dying silk scarves in town and then you’ll head to a restaurant. If it weren’t for the restrictive life forced upon you by the world you live in, maybe the two of you would live somewhere more exciting. Somewhere with more than enough novelties for you to gawk at in awe.
Nayuta snorts at your dramatic lament, “you’re so cheesy.”
“You’re the cheesy one,” you blow a raspberry against the juncture between her jaw and neck and Nayuta squeals immediately.
“Gahahaha!” Nayuta ducks away and you giggle in return. She’s always been a bit ticklish, you’re simply the one lucky enough to do so without repercussions.
“I know ways to make tomorrow come much faster,” Power’s snark cuts through your flirting like a dull knife. The Blood Fiend rarely ever sits still unless it is mealtime or she is watching something thrilling enough. The evening news normally is usually not something that makes Power lay down in the middle of the living room floor on a throw pillow yet here she is. "Being stricken with blunt force guarantees many hours to pass you unknowingly.'
You raise an eyebrow at Power’s unwarranted attitude, “what’s got you in such a shitty mood?”
“They mentioned the Chainsaw Devil on the news earlier,” Nayuta recounts as if telling you the weather report. She looks over her shoulder at where Power lays coolly. “It’s the anniversary of when the Bomb and Chainsaw Devils showed up in Tokyo.” Right, I forgot. They only showed up once however many years ago and still the news would cover it like it could happen again at any moment. You secretly believe Hayakawa Power hopes for the same. You never met Hayakawa Denji, you only heard the stories. He sounded like an even bigger handful than Power.
Power is all that remains from everyone who once claimed the Hayakawa name as their own.
“Don’t mention that name in front of me!” Power snarls without looking in your direction. She doesn’t move to change the channel regardless.
“Pitiful,” Nayuta comments but her grip around you tightens in spite of it as she rests her ear against your chest.
Pitiful.
You open one too many bags of popcorn while Nayuta puts on one of the Inazuma Eleven DVDs Power got on her birthday last year. The five dogs excitedly run around the house to the sound of Power obnoxiously singing "Stand up! Stand up! We love football!" Tora is content to rest on your lap and Meowy the Second takes off with her second popcorn kernel.
To wait this long for someone who ran away and never looked back is pitiful.
A Power who isn’t living up to her proudly chosen name is even more so.
You breathe in the scent of Nayuta’s shampoo as she rests her head on your shoulder. It really is too damn pitiful.
ー
“You ever wonder why there are devils but no angels?”
One of Nayuta’s classmates’ words piqued your interest from the other side of the room. Nayuta’s eyes followed yours in vague interest at the students piled in the corner. The only one you personally recognized was Yamada Moe, your class’ president. True to your word, you were on a date for lunch.
As much of a date it could be at school, anyway.
Everyday the lunch hour reared its delicious head, you’d make your way to Nayuta’s class to eat with her. “I mean, think about it. If devils are physical manifestations of the things we fear, why are there no physical manifestations of the things we love? Like, there are plenty of people who love snakes. So why’s there no Snake Angel?”
“A Chicken Angel would be pretty damn powerful then,” a different girl, likely the class clown, chirped. “But would angels be biblically accurate?” Her eyebrows move mischievously at her suggestions.
“Don’t say that,” Moe covered her mouth with her hand as she giggled. Her deep dark brown hair, the color of charred wood, is pulled back into a ponytail and her green eyes sparkled at the thought. “I’d love to see a Hamster Angel then.”
“Or even a Mermaid Angel! That would be so pretty!”
“Mermaids aren’t real, Rika.”
“Neither are zombies but there’s still a Zombie Devil,” ‘Rika’ sputtered in her defense, cheeks pink. “Everyone’s afraid of zombies and everyone loves mermaids, so both would exist by that logic!”
You considered their words with a silent hum. Himeno said she met an Angel Devil once, I think. I wonder how strong he is.
“ー and Makima had promised me to protect him if anything ever came out about him but, well,” Himeno trailed off before vaguely gesturing towards you. You remembered the discomfort of it even as the woman brushed it off with a warm palm placed on your head. “It’s fine though. Kishibe’s given me no updates concerning him and in our business, that’s a good thing. That twerp is doing just fine.”
If an Angel Devil is the manifestation of humanity’s fear of angels, you wondered what a Devil Angel would be like.
“Rika, Tomoko,” Nayuta placed her chopsticks atop her empty lunch box before resting her cheek on her hand. “Give me your desserts,” she yawned. Beneath the table, her legs twined with yours.
“Sure thing, Nayuta,” Rika beamed, holding up a pudding cup enthusiastically.
Tomoko nodded, looking relieved, “my mom packed me too many things anyway.”
Moe glowered in your direction.
It was almost reminiscent of the times you were both street urchins and Nayuta used her powers to ensure you’d be able to eat that day. The only difference is, as Tomoko and Rika walk the moderate distance to your half of the room, that you no longer are that desperate to eat. Nayuta smiled when she saw, among their treats, was an anpan roll with roasted black sesame seeds. Sweets were the secret to this young girl’s heart, all hints of disinterest washed away. Cute. “It’s one of your favorites, [First],” enthusiastically she opened the packaging before raising it to your lips. “Does it taste good?”
You relished the mixture of bread, sesame and adzuki beans on your tongue, “yeah, this is pretty nice.” You looked over at the unsuspecting girls who are too happy to help. Too happy and unaware of the reality of the situation. “Thanks.”
“It’s no problem,” Rika brushed off your gratitude with a dispassionate wave of her hand. “What kind of angels would you guys be excited to see? Mermaid Angels would be pretty cool, right?”
You shrugged, not wanting to reveal your inherent bias, “I can’t really imagine what an angel would be like. We’ve never seen one.”
“I just think if we had angels, they would be the ones fighting devils,” Tomoko sighed wistfully, light years away from where you were gathered in class 3-C. “Love is the strongest thing in the world, right?”
“The power of love is cheesy,” Nayuta scoffed.
The three of you ー Tomoko, Rika and yourself ー shared a look of varying degrees of disbelief.
“Since you find it so cheesy, maybe you can finally stop blocking the halls when you makeout and cuddle in the hallway,” Moe rolled her eyes from where she still sat, nose scrunched in equal measures of disgust. Her eyes held your own with a look of annoyance and you couldn’t hold back a snort.
“We are pretty annoying, huh,” you snickered, winking at how Nayuta was still holding the pastry near your lips. Laughter of agreement followed your admission from those sprinkled across the room save for two individuals. If Nayuta had been someone else, perhaps she would have withered under the scathing eyes of class 3-A’s president. Because she wasn't someone else, though, she met the glare with her own. “Even the Love Devil would hate us,” you bit into the roll once again, stealing Nayuta’s attention.
“The Love Devil is probably ugly anyway,” Nayuta replied with a petulant smirk.
Lunch continued without further hiccups, much to your relief. The desserts were eaten and the desks were back in place and it was time for you to head back to class. Nayuta still wasn’t entirely pleased at your class assignments, but she got better about it the following months. The ‘dates’ and walks had kept her placated.
“Thanks for that, [First],” Himeno sighed gratefully when Nayuta was in the bath after your celebratory dinner. “When are kids supposed to stop having temper tantrums? We really don’t need her having one at school. You have to be her anchor.”
You’d have done that even if Himeno didn’t want it. “I’ll pick you up after class,” you told Nayuta unnecessarily but you knew she liked the reassurance. You’d always come back for her even if there was distance standing in the way of that.
“You can make out with Nagano later,” Moe scoffed as she walked past you to room 3-A.
Nayuta glared over your shoulder at the brunette, “she’s ugly.”
“I do gotta get to class though,” you sighed heavily, throwing an arm over Nayuta's shoulder. She returned the gesture with both arms thrown around you. “My adoring fans in 3-A await me.”
“You don’t need your adoring fans when you have me,” Nayuta hugged you tighter and you don’t find yourself disagreeing.
You tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear, “that’s pretty true. Those guys mean nothing. You’re my number one.” Gold eyes looked at you like you were a dream before you had to turn around.
“Why do you even like her?” Moe scoffed as you caught up lazily. “She’s awful.”
“She’s cute,” your lips curled at the waves of irritation directed at you further.
Moe’s expression contorted into one of disgust at your answer, storming ahead of you. “People like you disgust me. You’re bullies.” We still sit next to each other so you’re not really doing anything, you know. Knowing it would be pointless telling the girl that, you looked over your shoulder to wave at Nayuta one last time before ducking into class.
“At least pretend to pay attention,” a quiet whisper from your right caught your attention. You shrugged, unbothered. You’ve withstood more terrifying things. Whatever you failed to do, that only seemed to upset the class president even further. “Follow along with the text before the teacher calls on you.”
“I forgot my textbook,” you whispered back, directing your eyes forward.
“You didn’t think to ask someone to look at theirs?” Moe asked incredulously.
You thumbed in the direction of the empty desk to your left. Kinomiya wasn’t there to mooch off of that day. “And it isn’t like you like me, or anything. I’ll just get the notes from someone else.”
“Unlike you, I’m a good person,” Moe muttered, raising her desk just enough that it wouldn’t make a sound as she pressed it against yours. “I’d have shared if you asked.”
“There are no good or bad people, just good or bad actions,” you countered her belief with one of your own. There aren’t even any devils that are purely bad. They only become bad to you because they killed someone you care about. Or because they destroyed something you considered precious. But if there was a devil that killed other devils and rescued people, you’d say they were good.
This philosophy could be applied even to angels.
Angels would only be considered good if they did help humanity fight against devils. If there were angels in an unseen place known as Heaven, they definitely didn’t feel called to fight against the apparent wicked. They didn’t feel called to defend the apparent helpless humans of Earth. And by that definition, that would make them bad creatures. Angels would be bad to you. “And if you have to say you’re a good person, you’re probably not as good as you think you are.” Moe gasped, brow furrowed in her offense as you leaned closer to read the page. “Thanks.”
She couldn’t have made it more apparent how much she hated you with how quickly she separated her desk from yours at the end of the day. You shrugged, not particularly bothered by the reaction.
Some people never meshed with each other and that was that.
Moe hated you and you were indifferent to her existence.
You initially believed Nayuta’s thoughts were the same as yours until she started wiping your arm as if it were filthy after school.
“You stink,” Nayuta’s nose scrunched in obvious displeasure, rubbing your arm as if she could scrub the smell of Yamada Moe away. Even now you were in awe of how strong her sense of smell was; Moe hadn’t even been wearing perfume. “Why do you smell like her?” If she meant to be intimidating in her glare, she failed before she could even try. Her furrowed brow was more cute than nerve racking.
“I forgot my textbook so we had to share,” you recalled the glares and looks of dismay. “She was not happy about it. I think Bags was lying on it so I didn’t see it when we were leaving.” You’d simply remember to check your book bag more thoroughly tomorrow morning. When you were a sizable distance from campus, you recalled the earlier discussion from lunch. “What did you think about all that angel talk at lunch today?”
“That humans are dumb,” as if realizing how that sounded, Nayuta pressed against you as you walked down the path apologetically. “99% of them.”
“You can say it, a lot of humans are dumb,” hands still woven together, you side step away just long enough to playfully tug Nayuta against. Power’s characteristic ‘gahahaha’s slip from Nayuta’s lips again, you aren’t sure when she started unconsciously mimicking her. It’s cute though. “Angels are just angels, even if they did exist. And it wouldn’t be like there’s a guarantee they’d want to just help humans either.”
“That’s because humans are arrogant,” Nayuta didn’t hold back her criticism with her concerns of offending you assuaged. “And they want to control the nature of everything. Fish swim, plants photosynthesize. Hurting is fine for devils.”
You chuckled at her choice of words, “I’d be the Pride Devil.” You took ownership of the inherent arrogance you possessed as a human of this good year.
“You’d be the [First] Devil,” Nayuta argued head tossed back joyously at the thought, giggling all the while.
“I don’t think enough people hate me for that to happen,” you chortled as you swung your hands back and forth. “Class Prez might, though. Maybe I should watch out. What if a [First] Devil does show up, am I gonna be replaced?”
Nayuta snorted affectionately, gold eyes bright like the sun, “you’re so dumb.”
A peaceful silence fell over you both and you released a satisfied breath. You wanted moments like this to last forever. “One day,” you looked at the orange-red sky above. “I’m gonna get old. At least, if I don’t die before then. But whatever ends up happening, we’re gonna be different,” you promised before Nayuta could protest what you’d begun to announce. “We’re not like them.”
ー and Makima’s time was too short; you’d heard that enough times since living with the Naganos.
That wasn’t going to be you and Nayuta.
“We’re not gonna be like them,” you promised, squeezing her hand tightly. “We’re gonna live forever.”
ー
When was it when the image of Makima began to haunt you like a ghost?
You remember now, it had been in October of your first and last year of middle school when Nayuta finally started braiding her hair. You’d been fine that morning up until she came to the kitchen and you dropped the jar of pickled radishes, quietly sobbing until you caught a fever.
“Do you hate my hair being like this?” Nayuta asked in the quiet of the room you shared. It’s large and spacious, fit for three people. You never understood why the third bed in the room was kept when Nayuta never slept in any bed that wasn’t your own. The dogs and cats got a kick out of it, at the very least. So did Power who was shuffling about in the kitchen, banging pots and pans.
“I think it’s pretty. You’re pretty no matter how you do your hair.”
“I found a picture of the old me in Himeno’s room. The old us. She had her hair like this in all of Himeno’s memories too.”
“You used your powers on Himeno?”
“When she took a nap the other day. I wanted,” Nayuta trailed off, arms wrapped around her knees and eyes downcast. You were too hot to cuddle but she sat on the floor by your side anyway. “I wanted to know what the old me was like. Himeno didn’t like her very much. She liked the old you better. She liked that Aki person more though.”
Power’s Aki, you recalled from the photos in a photo album Ichika made for Power’s birthday. “Himeno likes you though. I told you before, we’re not ー and Makima. It doesn’t matter if she didn’t like her.” Maybe Himeno had a thing against redheads.
“She thinks it sometimes. I can tell.”
I know.
“The old man said I was selfish when he met us.”
“I like that you’re selfish. We both get to be selfish at this point. Do you know how long we were in that dump?” You shared a laugh at the memory of the dump in question. The mattress was old as sin, rock hard and the blankets you owned couldn’t keep crickets out let alone the cold. “I miss robbing that one guy with the dolphin apron. He made the best dumplings. Wish we could have found the secret formula so we could still make them.”
“Humans can be dumb but the food is really good,” Nayuta’s lips turned upright.
You shift a bit so you can lay on your side, facing her more clearly, “do you remember what it was like in Hell?”
Nayuta shook her head, braid dancing to the motion. “Only little bits and pieces, but it’s blurry,” she disclosed, words soft. “I only remember wanting to leave soon.”
“When I was a kid, I always thought I was missing something,” you hold out your hand and Nayuta’s fingers slip into your own. You never knew another hand could be this warm, not even when your parents were alive. You don’t think you’d truly been warm until you met the girl who changed everything. You wanted to hold onto this life; hold it for as long as you could. You disavowed that there’d be a day you’d stop being you and Nayuta stopped being Nayuta and the new versions of you would run into the dawn hand in hand. You and Nayuta would live forever. “I’m really happy that I found you.”
Any sentimentality in the room was immediately blown away by the sound of Power kicking open the door.
“We have a doorknob, Power,” you groaned. Then you caught a whiff of the smell of broth, chicken and vegetables and raised yourself into a sitting position. Taking note of your realization, the strawberry-haired fiend puffed out her chest proudly as she presented the tray to you. The bowl was filled to the brim with soup, sloshing over the lip as she stepped forward and the crackers were worse for wear because of it. “You cooked?”
“Homemade! Straight from the can!” Power placed the tray on your lap, hands resting on her hips. “You humans are fragile creatures, so I decided to grant you my assistance.”
You had to purse your lips together to prevent yourself from laughing. “You know what, thanks, Power,” you let the fiend have her moment. Her homemade straight-from-the-can soup smelled pretty damn good.
ー
“Ichika, are you dating anyone?”
“What brought that on so suddenly?”
You shrug from where you sit at the kitchen table. “Because you never go anywhere unless it’s the farmer’s market,” you point out deftly. Work and home, that’s all either Nagano sister seems to have time for, save for the occasional pub night. No one in this house has much of a social life when you ponder it for more than two seconds. “We were kids before but it’s not like you don’t have a life now.”
“You’re all still kids to me,” Ichika’s laugh is light and playful, like she’s daring you to protest otherwise.
“Power might be,” you lean back in your chair with a quiet snort. “She’s always been a handful.”
It’s rare for the house to be this quiet between the dogs and Power. The former are on a walk with Nayuta and the latter tagged along with Himeno to the market. Power has a child-like nature you doubt will ever fade. If something happens to Ichika and Himeno, what’s going to happen to Power?
“I recall all three of you being handfuls,” Ichika continues washing away at a plate with a laugh. “I’m not sure how you remember it but you and Nayuta had your moments too.” You remember your last first day of middle school and how Nayuta turned Power into a dog. You can recall many instances of Power falling prey to Nayuta’s power, truthfully. Himeno hated it. “Well, you had the least amount of tantrums, so I suppose I can give you that.”
You snort, lips curling in amusement, “name one tantrum I had.”
“I distinctly recall the time you were upset Himeno ate your leftovers.”
“That was different,” you cross your arms resolutely. “I counted everything I had left and put the numbers on the box!” If Power has a child-like nature, Himeno is a permanent child at heart. “I told her if she wanted something, to let me know. But she didn’t! She just wanted to mooch off my plate!” How many times has she put me through this? She hasn’t changed since I quit working at the Bureau.
“Himeno, I’m getting something to eat. What do you want?”
“It’s okay, I’m not hungry.”
“Himeno,” you eyed the woman with your lips pressed together and eyes narrowed. “I’m getting something to eat. What. Do you want?”
“Nothing, ー, geez! I’m not even hungry!”
“Liar, because I know damn well the moment I get back you’re going to want whatever I’m having! You know what, at this point, get your ass up. We’re leaving.”
“Wow,” Himeno held a hand against her chest, mockingly crushed. “This is how little you trust your best friend? I thought we had something special.”
“I trust you as much as I trust Nanaka not to poison me the first chance she gets,” you’d only been working for Japan’s Public Safety Devil Hunters for a month and the brunette still hated you. Apparently the transgressions of being assigned the partner of her beloved Makima was too heavy a crime. “I think I saw a new Italian place open up by the convenience store ran by that Brazilian couple I told you about.”
“Are you alright, dear?” You rub your forehead as if the motion will chase away ー’s memories with a vengeance.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I never worked at the Bureau, you remind yourself. And I don’t want to. I’m no hero. That was ー’s desire. You only desire that which is most simple. “But you never answered my question. We’re not kids anymore.”
Ichika sets aside her wet rubber gloves on the drying rack, wiping the remnants of moisture onto her apron. “You don’t have to worry about me, [First]. I’ve never been the social butterfly, my sister’s always been the brave one.” You wonder what memories Ichika recalls as she takes a seat in her usual spot across the table. “That’s why she became a devil hunter. But even when we were in school, she got along with everybody.”
“You said you were in the tea ceremony club, right?”
She perks up in pleasant surprise, “that’s right! I’m surprised you remember!” The summer before you started high school, Ichika pulled out their old yearbooks from when they were students. “It feels like just yesterday both of you were in high school.”
“It basically was just yesterday.” It hadn’t been long at all since graduation and your classmates flocked out of Shonai to various major cities across the country. Everyone but the two of you. “High school was… better than middle school.”
“That it was,” you know from the slight frown on Ichika’s face she is remembering exactly how much of a mess your time at Higashi Middle School had been. So much so you transferred to Kitahoro Middle halfway through attendance. “It was hard for the two of you.”
ー
“[Last]?” A voice that twinkles like a bell calls for you. “[Full name] is that you?”
It’s a little past lunch that Saturday afternoon and the day is sleepy for both humans and devils. You hadn’t seen so much as even a trace of devil activity, deciding to have an early lunch after tossing your weapon of choice underneath a dumpster in a back alley.
You turn around at the sound of your name, fearful it is Himeno who has found you.
Thankfully, this person is Himeno’s opposite in every way.
Their eyes are green instead of blue and their hair is a dark brown instead of navy.
I know this person.
“Oh, Class Prez,” you blink in realization. Yamada Moe, in the flesh. “It’s been a while.”
ー
On a school day like any other it announced that Kiritani Tomoko had been killed by a devil. Rare as that was in a small town like Shonai, everyone had been shaken up.
“How ironic,” you heard the whispers from the adults around you. “It was the Rooster Devil. How ironic when her family raises chickens. Even here in Shonai, devils are everywhere.”
Adults who in the same breath greet Power and Nayuta with warmth whenever they are seen walking down the street.
Hypocrites.
Tomoko’s death is unfortunate but you won’t pretend it was something that impacted you personally. To the president of 3-A, Yamada Moe, it was an unforgivable blow. You didn’t see her during lunch in 3-C, nor did she come back from lunch despite leaving her bookbag and pen on her desk.
“Rika’s not here, either,” Nayuta told you when you pointed out the empty desk.
You aren’t saddened by the death of Kiritani Tomoko but you know of a death you couldn’t recover from.
So you don’t fight it when your teacher tells you to find where Moe has slipped away to and you don’t drag her back from the ponytail when you find her crying on the rooftop either. “Hey,” you closed the door behind you.
“Just go away,” Moe shuddered, holding herself tighter. “Why are you even here?”
“Hori-sensei wanted me to come find you.”
Moe raises her head with hot anger, eyes red and weary, “like you suddenly care about being a good student.”
“I told you before, didn’t I?” You plopped on the ground in spite of Moe’s protests, hands resting on your lap. The autumn wind is comforting against your skin and the rolling clouds are fluffy. An unsuspecting day to learn someone from school died. “I don’t believe in good or bad people. People just do good or bad things. But I get it,” you shrugged lackadaisically. “Nayuta does a lot of bad things. It isn’t like I’m a saint either, we’ve done plenty of bad. If that makes us bad people to you, that’s fine. But I get what it’s like to lose people too.
“My parents were good ones. But some asshole hit them with their car when I was seven and I was stuck on my own until I was thirteen,” what would have happened to you next if you had left things to the authorities around you? You’re unsure. At seven years old, running away seemed like the best option at the time. No princes would be coming to save you so you became your own prince. “Devils. Cops. Figuring out what to eat. The other people out on the streets could be the worst too. I got into a lot of fights back then.” All to lie in a building the government had yet to demolish. “I thought the world ended. Or at least my place in it had. If I never met Nayuta, I’m not sure how much longer I could have kept going like that.”
Spotting movement to your left, you looked to Moe and your eyes caught one another.
Red as her eyes were, they were wide at your confession with her mouth slightly ajar. “It’s corny but when she’s here, I feel like I can do anything.” Survive on the streets for months or even fight devil hunters that were planning to kill you before you could blink. “So she gets to do awful things. Nayuta can do the most awful things in the world. She’s perfect.” She’d been perfect the moment you met her. “So I can’t say much about being sad about Tomoko, because I didn’t know her like that. But I know how it feels to lose someone and I know what it’s like to be terrified it’ll happen again. So for what it’s worth, I’m sorry about your friend.”
“Sorry,” Moe murmured. "Thank you."
“You don’t have anything to apologize for, you’re the one upset.”
...
“Aren’t you supposed to make me go back to class?”
“I’ll just tell Teach I got lost or something,” you yawned. “It’s none of his business.”
“You’re actually a good person, aren’t you?” Moe sniffled, resting her forehead against her knees. “You just pretend to be mean.”
“Good people don’t exist,” you sang, watching the clouds roll by. “Now mean, that I can be.”
“Now you’re being stubborn,” Moe muttered under her breath, sniffing again. “You’re good. It’s just being with Nagano Nayuta makes you act like a jerk.”
“It’s fine, you don’t have to like her,” you close your eyes with a light smile. “The less people realizing all her positive sides, the more Nayuta there is for me.”
“I don’t know how you stomach being around her,” you shrugged. “She’s like poison. The two of you together doesn’t feel right. She doesn’t feel right.
You open one eye, “what do you mean?”
“It’s just a feeling I get,” Moe explained vaguely, twisting her hands together anxiously.
.
“Nayuta, don’t use your powers at school for a while.”
“Why not?”
“I found the C-” “Yamada thinks there’s something off about you and everyone else is still on edge about that last devil attack. So it’ll be better to lay low until everything calms down.”
“Who’s that?”
“My class’ president. You know her, you think she’s ugly.”
“... Do you like her?”
“She’s alright, I guess. She’s just a classmate.”
“What about me?”
“You’re everything.”
Nayuta leapt onto your back in her satisfaction, legs wrapped tightly around your waist. “I’ll leave the humans at school alone then.”
“Don’t use them no matter what, alright? We can just get extra snacks on the way home from school or something.”
“I won’t.”
ー
“You cut your hair, it looks good!”
“Thanks,” Moe plays with a lock of curly hair, boyishly short. It suits her rather nicely. You look freer. “It’s surprising seeing you here. What are you…?” She glances quickly at the hazmat-style onesie you’ve dressed yourself in, plastic visor raised above your head.
“Got a janitorial job and I’m taking no chances,” you lean against the cold bench lazily. “I never mocked a janitor before but I damn sure am never going to now. Those guys are the unsung heroes of our society.”
“Janitori-” Moe snorts in her shock, looking like you’ve grown two heads. “I always figured you’d become a philosophy teacher considering how you were back in middle school”
“Nayuta’s signed up for classes but I’m taking a couple years off to save,” what you plan on majoring in when the time comes is unknown even to you. Perhaps Moe is onto something with philosophy. “We can’t mooch off our benefactors forever.” What’s going to happen to Power if anything happens to Himeno and Ichika, you find yourself pondering once again. A third passport shouldn’t be that hard to forge. Kishibe got me and Nayuta into the country without any problem, didn’t he?
“Oh, where is she going?”
“She’s at Tohoku too,” you nod at the Tohoku University tote bag resting on Moe's hip. “She’s doing everything virtually. Business Management major.”
There’s little surprise on Moe’s part when she hears that, “Business Management sounds like something that suits her.”
“She is pretty bossy, I can give you that,” you huff with an airy sigh. Management is something Nayuta will definitely thrive in. “She’s a damn good student though. What about you? What have you been up to? Majoring in law?”
“Philosophy, actually!” She laughs at how your eyebrows raise. “Surprising?”
“A little,” you nod and Moe rolls her eyes in playful exasperation. “But with all the arguments we had, philosophy or law honestly made the most sense. So I wasn’t that far off.”
“Those weren’t arguments, those were debates,” Moe corrects you needlessly, arms behind her back. It’s almost like all the tension left her when she cut her hair.
“You’ve mellowed out, Prez,” you whistle, impressed.
A younger Moe would have asked what you meant with a furrowed brow. The Moe of the present day accepts your words with a hearty laugh. “I was a bit high strung back then,” she lets out a nostalgic sigh. “Maybe more than a bit,” she admits sheepishly. “But middle school really feels so long ago. I guess I changed without noticing.”
“Sorry about middle school,” your lips curl into a grimace. “The stuff with Nayuta I mean.”
Moe’s eyebrows knit together with an empathetic curl of her lips, “it’s okay, I get it now. You were under a lot of stress back then.”
“How’s Rika doing?” You vaguely remember that girl who Nayuta would pawn snacks off of. “She going to Tohoku too?”
“Oh,” Moe shuffles nervously.
“What, did she drop out or something?”
“No, um, she never went to university,” Moe fiddles with a bracelet on her left wrist.
You raise an eyebrow at the odd behavior, “is she… dead?”
“No!” Moe answers quickly and you cock your head to the side, shrugging your shoulders. Okay then what is she then? “It’s just that she… became a devil hunter after we graduated.”
“Okay,” Good luck then, Rika. If you’re in Tokyo maybe Kishibe’ll be the one in charge of your training. As much as you hate the man, everything he’s taught you has kept you alive so far. You see green staring at you. “What?”
“I’m just surprised that you took that so well,” Moe breathes in disbelief. “Considering everything with Nayuta, I was afraid to bring devil hunters up in front of you.”
Your blood runs cold. “What do you mean ‘considering everything with Nayuta’?”
“Did-” Moe blinks once before she covers her mouth in horror. “Did you not know? I’m- I’m so sorry-”
“I found the C-”
.
“How did you know Nayuta wasn’t human? When did you figure it out?”
“When… that time back in middle school. She didn’t look human to me and when you went to her I just thought… in that moment Nayuta being a devil is why you were always so protective of her,” Moe’s head looks around the alley you’ve brought her too cautiously. It’s deep, deep within the darkest crevices of Sendai. “Where are we? Why are we here?”
You look at Moe and then the dumpster beside you, “I have to tell you the truth about something.” Your thumb brushes against your middle and index fingers for a moment. “I’m not really a janitor. I’ve been killing devils for the past seven months now. It’s underground work though.” You tell Moe this news as one might tell their friend they decided to plant tulips in their garden, reaching for where you slid your axe underneath the grimy trash heap.
“Devils?”
“Yeah.”
Moe looks at your rusty blade, caked in the blood from those you’ve killed thus far. “... But Nayuta,” she is unable to bring herself to say the rest.
You laugh, leaning against the wall for half a second before deciding you can’t stand the feel of it against your back. Nor do you wish to feel the eyes of Moe upon you. “Yeah, it’s sick isn’t it? She’s a devil but I’ve been out here for the past seven months killing ‘em. But Nayuta,” black hair and red rings fill your memories. “she means everything to me; I was alone for years until I met her. I have never cared that she was a devil. She was perfect, she’s still perfect. If anything ever happened to her, it would feel like the entire world was ending. I used to be a cashier, you know, but try making enough money to sneak a devil out of the country at your local 7-11,” you laugh humorously. “And I know you’ve never liked Nayuta but for me, Nayuta is everything. So please… please don’t tell anyone.”
“I won’t, [First]!” A foot steps towards you, voice full of emotion. “I didn’t like Nayuta before but I get it now! There are good devils out there and I’m going to prove it. That’s why I’m studying philosophy! If humans and devils can understand each other, we wouldn’t have to kill each other anymore!”
“She means everything to me,” your fingers dig into your palms as you repeat yourself weakly. She’s the best thing you knew you needed in a world that had nearly beaten you down for good. The one you would find repeatedly no matter the time and distance that separated you. “What am I doing? Killing devils for money like this when I know…” your shoulders sag. “But I can’t do anything else for her. I can’t earn money fast enough otherwise and I don’t have time to wait. I’m sure… this makes me a bad person, doesn’t it?”
“You are not a bad person,” Moe’s hand is warm on your back even through the layers you wear to keep yourself from being bloodied. “It’s not you that’s wrong, it’s the world itself. If enough people just realized that, things would be better.” A world where humanity and devils lived together in harmony? It seems like an impossible dream; perhaps it is one not within reach. Not within the lifetime you currently possess. And that’s okay, I’ll make my own happiness even with that fact. “You’re just trying to do what you can for the one you love in a shitty situation. Nayuta would understand that. So… so don’t beat yourself up about this. I never told anyone about Nayuta and I’m never going to.”
There was nothing familiar about her black hair, nor the mole under her left eye. You were sure you couldn’t say you’d ever met anyone with golden eyes with red rings in them either. There was no reason to feel like your senses had been set ablaze and the universe shifted.
You didn’t know this girl.
This girl was a stranger.
You knew this and yet you still fell to your knees as warm tears flooded your eyes without your permission.
You breathe.
“By the way,” you yawned, as it dawned on you that you never once asked for your new companion’s name. “what’s your name?”
When there was no immediate response, you thought the girl fell asleep. “Nayuta,” you finally heard the feathery light reply. Nayuta pressed herself closely to your chest, listening to your heartbeat.
“I’m [First],” you squeezed.
Nayuta squeezed back.
You breathe.
“I didn’t, [First], please believe me! Don’t leave me!”
You slide down your visor.
“We can get married for real when we grow up,” you vowed once more as you clumsily led each other in your dance.
Nayuta’s smile was saccharin, “promise?”
“Promise.”
And you breathe.
“Hey, Nayuta, pick a country. One that doesn’t have a devil hunting association in it.”
“Seychelles,” Nayuta didn’t miss a beat, grinning the devilish grin you loved all the while. “We still need to have our honeymoon.”
The back of your fist strikes Moe’s throat before she has time to react.
“Don’t worry at all, Prez,” you kick the woman to the ground, grip on your axe tightening as you sit atop her. “I know you won’t tell anyone.” You wonder what those forest green eyes see when they look up at you, eyes wide as she gasps for air. You hold her jaw in place, gloved fingers digging into her skin.
“Stop-” her words come quiet, hoarse. “I won’t tell! I really won’t tell!”
She won’t say anything. No. She might. She hasn’t snitched in all these years. She could change her mind. Cut off her tongue. Her fingers too. And the toes. All of it needs to go.
“I could cut off your tongue,” you feel her breath hitch from she freezes under your touch. You feel the beat of a pulse, pounding like a drum. “but you could still use your fingers. I could cut your fingers and you could use your toes. I could cut off everything and you’d still probably find a way to get out a message with the stumps too.” Tears swell in Moe’s eyes and you barely feel her fists beating into your shoulder. I’m glad I hit her in the throat, you finally take note of her barely audible, ragged whispers. “You can say you won’t talk until you’re blue in the face but there is nothing that can stop you from ever changing your mind. I’m sorry. I really did like you.”
See? I became a bad person to you just now, didn’t I?
The weight of your axe is heavy as it follows the push of gravity guiding your hand into soft flesh below. There’s a quick breath, a gurgle, that slips from Moe’s lips and you raise your axe again.
Red droplets strike your visor and you raise your axe again.
Muscle and sinew decorate the dirty earth around you and you raise your axe again.
Again and again even when what you strike is hard rock instead of flesh until you raise your axe a final time, and you hear metal clink that isn’t your own.
Your neck cracks from the force you whip your neck and the devil flinches when your eyes meet, not daring to press its raised hand to the ground. When you look closely, you see a twisted green soda can wobbling underneath it. Your shoulders steadily heave from your fatigue, neither of you moving a centimeter. You can’t hold back a tired laugh from the absurdity, resting a hand on a knee as you push yourself up. “Sorry,” you titter, neither of you blinking as you step to the side. “You’re hungry, aren’t you,” you gesture to the body, still warm. “It’s okay. Eat it.”
The devil’s mouth trembles, eyes flittering between you and the still lumps on the ground. It takes a step back.
You blink, letting your hand hang loosely against your leg. “What are you waiting for? I said eat it.”
As if coming back to life, the devil on all fours takes one step forward - then another - until it rushes past you to begin its feast. You raise your visor when the devil turns its head, jowls soaked in blood, eyes narrow. It eats stiffly, eying you and the axe in your hand. You smile reassuringly, eyes soft.
The Rat Devil should be about ¥600,000 right?
ー
Nayuta squeals when you lift her feet off the ground as you laugh maniacally, arms safely tucked underneath her back and legs.
An evening walk on the beach is just what you need after a trying day at work. The moon is full and the evening Shonai air is sweet unlike the stink of the city, heavy with exhaust and blood. Thanks for not being a bitch this time, Nishida. The Rat Devil cost as much as you estimated it would, if not a bit higher.
The life you lead isn’t perfect but it has its moments.
“We’re going to fall!” Nayuta shrieks but her grin is wide and shining under the moonlight. She’s almost like a siren, you think, as the waves accompany her voice. The sand squishes underneath your toes, kicking up the waves as you spin and spin. One day when you carry her like this, she’ll be in a beautiful dress and veil just like you talked about when you were kids.
“Relax,” you tilt your head back, tasting the ocean spray on your lips. “I’m never gonna drop you!”
ー
“[First],” Himeno calls in a sing-song voice as you walk out the door. “Wait for me, kiddo! I need you to give me a ride!”
Your hand grips the car handle as you tilt your head back with a loud groan, “Himeno, I’m going to work.” The sun hasn’t risen yet nor have the morning birds begun singing their songs. Eight months you have been able to successfully stave off this conversation.
Eight months.
You hope to make it nine.
“Wow,” Himeno jeers, undeterred and you know your stomach will be heavy with dread if you’re unable to shake her off your tail. Eight months you’ve been able to successfully avoid this conversation with Himeno and you don’t plan to break your record. “Someone gets a job and the moment she starts moving up in the world she forgets about all the people she met along the way.”
“Yep,” you click your tongue. “I'm one of those people. So it looks like you’ll have to wait until someone else decides to be your chauffeur. I’ll call Sebastian to retrieve you later.”
“So they’re paying enough at 7-11’s for you to afford Sebastian’s rates?” Himeno whistles, impressed and awed as she rests a large stack of ¥10,000 on top of the car. “Can you recommend me a position? If I’d known that, I’d have left Himeji’s ages ago.”
Blue stares into [color].
Wordlessly, you sit in the car and Himeno follows suit, quiet as you pull out of the driveway and far from the coziness of home. She waits nearly ten minutes to the hour before she opens her lips, a smile in her voice that is frigid. “You have the look of a killer now,” your eyes flit to your reflection in the rearview mirror. “I wonder how many things you had to kill to get eyes like that.”
“What’s the issue with killing,” you mutter, eyes on the empty road. How she found the money is of little consequence. She has it and that’s all that matters. “Why did you make me learn how to kill them if you didn’t want me to do it?”
“Those skills were for protecting yourself,” you scoff at her answer. What’s self-defense to her will never accommodate your ambitions. “Not going out of your way to get yourself killed. As long as you’re living under my roof-”
“Oh don’t worry, we won’t be living there for much longer,” you cut off your benefactor.
“We?”
“We!” The car comes to an abrupt halt as your glares turn on one another. “You and Ichika aren’t going to be here protecting us forever! You think Power actually has the ability to live on her own in a world of humans? You’re not going to live forever!”
“And you think you are?!” Himeno laughs at the ludicrous presumption.
“I’m going to figure things out by then!”
Three adult passports.
(I’ll need the forgeries too.)
Visa.
Housing.
Food.
Permanent Residency.
(Can’t believe I forgot about ticket costs. Where do I go for illegally flying devils out of the country, huh? And the pets. What do I do to bring-)
“[First]-”
“And I don’t need your help to do that! And I don’t need to be under your roof either, I’ll move out! I have enough!”
“ー stop!”
“I’M NOT ー!” Himeno balks as you scream, slamming your hand against the driver’s window. The glass cracks but it does not shatter. “ ー isn’t coming back and the one you’re stuck with now is me! And I know you hate that and you have to be reminded that your best friend died every time you look at me but I am not her! I’m never going to be her!” Those memories would never be yours. Makima was never going to be yours. Makima is Makima, Nayuta is Nayuta. The difference is night and day. “I’m not like her! I hate her! I hate,” your voice cracks and you rest your head on the steering wheel, squeezing the handle tightly. “I hate it. I hate that you only want to see her. You never want to see me.”
“When Kishibe brought you both to me, I wanted to take you in immediately. And I have to be honest, a good portion of it was because of who you used to be. But I know you, [First],” a hand rests on your back, warm, but you’re too tired to brush it away. “You’re brave and kind and you look out for the people you care about even if it means you have to take the brunt force of everything. Nayuta has no idea about this and it’s because you want to keep her safe.”
“I don’t want her to come to the city and be discovered again,” “I’ve found the Control Devil.” The five words you fear hearing the most. “A life where Nayuta can be free. That’s all I want.”
“I see you, [First]. I see you and I see Nayuta and I’m very proud of who you’ve become and the people you’ll grow into for as long as I get to see it. I just haven’t been doing a good job showing that and for that, I’m so sorry,” her voice is cloyingly thick and in spite of yourself, your eyes feel hot. “Even if I could go back and stop ー from dying, I wouldn’t. I would never give up having you in my life, not even for her. You, Power, Nayuta. All three of you are precious to me, younger sisters I’ve always wanted.”
“You already had a younger sister, idiot,” you wipe your nose against your sleeve, disregarding your disgust for the trail of snot it leaves on the fabric. “Does Ichika mean nothing to you?”
“More younger sisters,” Himeno laughs wetly. “The four of you give me a life that’s worth living. I love it when Power plays her anime at the loudest volume possible. I can even look back on Nayuta and Power’s fights with a smile, isn’t that funny? At the time those situations weren’t funny but that’s how sisters are, I guess. And you always thought you could be slick hiding that you could be as much of a brat as the rest of us. Well, except for maybe Ichika. You should have seen her when she was four.”
You laugh despite yourself, “Ichika was probably the most well-behaved four year old on the planet. You probably made your parents want to send you back to the hospital.”
Himeno chortles, “only half the time.”
A pleasant silence falls over the vehicle.
“I think it’s time to call Grandpa Kishibe and finally move from this place. The house is getting too small,” Himeno leans back in her seat and stares at the leather ceiling. “The geezer should foot the bill for everything, he never even sent me child support.”
“Nayuta wants to go to Seychelles,” you follow Himeno's example, resting against your seat. It's dawn now, you note the fingers of the sun peeking behind the clouds and painting the sky hues of rose, indigo and vermillion.
You love the dawn.
“I know a place even better than that,” it’s supposed to be a wink but with the eyepatch, who can tell. “Remember that Angel Devil I told you about? The place he lives is pretty damn snazzy and warm all-year round. A place where even devils can live freely.”
ー
You barely had time to dry your hands on your skirt when Rika burst through the bathroom door, chest heaving. “[First], come quick,” the girl’s eyes were wide with fear. “Moe and Nayuta got into a fight!”
You bolted through the door, shoving Rika to the side.
Class 3-C was a mess by the time you arrived and calling what likely happened was a disservice to what you were welcomed to. Desks were skewed to the side as if a tornado had blown through it, food strewn across the floor. No one noticed your presence, not when Moe sat on the floor holding her jaw, battered and nose dripping with blood and Nayuta’s short form towered over her with silent menace.
“Nayuta, stop,” you stand between the devil and the human foolish enough to invoke her wrath.
“Why?” Gold eyes glowed harshly.
“You’ll kill her.”
“Why do you care if she dies? You said she didn’t mean anything to you. So I don’t understand,” Nayuta appeared to stand perfectly still but you could hear the tremor in her voice. From rage or from wanting to cry, you didn’t know. “Why are you protecting this girl? I’m all you need. Aren’t I?” Taking a half-step forward, Nayuta gripped your arms as if they were her lifeline. “Aren’t I?”
One year ago, not long after you turned thirteen, a blazing star sought refuge in your chest.
The birth of the universe.
Within that birth, you willingly took a devil’s hand and ran across the playground of the divine welcoming all damnation.
You’d do it for as long as she wanted you.
“From now and forever, we are going to stay together. We’ll eat a lot together, sleep together and live a happy life together,” you hold Nayuta to your chest, closer than what is possible between devils and man. “More than anyone in the world, you’re the only person I need. And I’ll never want anyone else either,” you whispered, brushing your fingers against her silky hair. “I told you before, didn’t I? We’re not like them. You and me are gonna live forever.”
“You want to be with me?”
“I want to be with you.”
“You’ll stay with only me?”
“I’m always gonna stay with only you.”
“You promise?”
“I promise.”
“Let’s go home, okay?” When you felt the weak nod of your beloved, you wrapped Nayuta’s legs around your waist. Your initial steps were shaky, pacing backwards for a few seconds before you caught your balance.
“I love you, [First],” Nayuta’s arms trembled around your shoulders and you hear the telltale signs of hiccuping.
“I love you too,” you held her closer if it was possible.
Warm droplets fall against your neck.
ー
Nayuta looks beautiful in her white dress, veil trailing delicately along the white sand.

translation notes.
織姫 「orihime」 - weaver princess
“If I became the monster to everyone but us and made sure we got home again, who would care if we’re unjust?”
#look she's writing#csm x reader#chainsaw man x reader#makima x reader#makima#nayuta#csm fic#makima fic#red-dyed string
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AFTERMATH
Pairing !! : Asa Mitaka / Reader
Fic Type !! : Queerplatonic / One-Shot / Reverse Comfort
CW !! : Allusions to SA, Traumatic Flashbacks, Implied AsaDen
Summary !! : You comfort Asa after the events of ch. 167.
Note !! : I'm writing a Denji Comfort fic too bcs i feel bad for the only hetero ship I was rooting for, screw u fujim*to
✦ MASTERLIST
The walls were closing in on her, that’s what it felt like.
Her world went dark and all she could feel was her bones turn to ice. She couldn’t move. Her body betrayed her, doing things she would never dream of doing. Ever. One blink and she could see the horrid scene in front of her again.. And again.. And again. She could hear the screams resounding within her own mind, pleas to stop it from happening, from continuing. She felt violated. She felt guilty. She felt so utterly.. Alone.
Asa flinched when she felt your fingers tuck a few stray strands of her hair behind her ear. You caressed her cheek, holding her close to you as she rested her head on your chest. “You’re safe, you don’t need to worry,” you tried to soothe her worries with your soft words. But Asa was still shaken after the whole ordeal, after what Yoru did.
You didn’t expect to find Asa at your door during the wee hours of the morning, but when she showed up with tear stains on her cheeks and wore a terrified expression, you couldn’t just look away from it and turn your back on her. She was someone you were close with and if she needed you, you’d be there for her. You’d told her so after 3 years of the friendship. Asa awakened a passion in you that wasn’t inherently romantic, but it wasn’t strictly platonic either. Asa however, did not mind the emotional intimacy. She quite liked having someone to talk to, someone that made her feel seen.
For her, you were that ‘someone’.
Asa wouldn’t tell you what happened to her that would put her in such a panicked state, but that was fine with you. She would tell you on her own time, you were only glad that she came to you when she needed help. “I’m probably bothering you..” Asa spoke, her voice was drastically different from how it usually was. Her voice sounded worn and was awfully quiet — a stark difference to the calm tone you were used to.
“No, Asa,” You ran your fingers through her long black hair, lightly scratching her scalp in an attempt to comfort her, “I promise you’re not. I told you to come to me if you ever needed me, remember?” Asa only closed her eyes in response, sighing and nuzzling further into your shirt. You smiled warmly, content that she was feeling at least a little better from before. Asa didn’t say anything in response, but she didn’t need to. Her actions almost always spoke for her.
“.. I feel hurt because of..” Asa trailed off, not feeling quite ready to tell you what had happened between her and Denji. “-But I also feel.. Guilty for it..? Am I to blame..?” She seemed to be asking these questions to herself, but you couldn’t help your urge to chime in and tell her that whatever it was, she definitely hadn’t been the cause of it.
“You’re valid in feeling hurt.” Your words were soft. Asa only looked down at her lap. “Asa, I’ve known you since freshman year — you’re not the type of person to do things without reason. Whatever it was that you did, just know that I'd still support you no matter what.” Your words calmed Asa’s fears down. She was afraid of what Denji thought about her, now that Yoru had done what she did. She quite liked having Denji around her and after this, she wondered.. Would they ever be able to go back to how things once were? Surely not..
“I think I messed things up with him..” Asa muttered.
“The annoying blonde kid?” You looked down at her with a half smile.
“Denji.”
“Right, Denji..” You chuckled, “Look, Asa. I may not be a dating expert or whatever — But whatever happened between you two, I believe that you two should talk about it and try to understand one another.” You kept petting her hair, the black strands feeling soft and smooth in between your fingers. “Denji, from what you’ve told me, doesn’t seem like the type of guy to leave you just because you mess up once.”
“If you knew what I did, you wouldn’t be saying that..”
“Even if I did, people have the capacity to grow and learn from their mistakes. If you feel guilty then you probably didn’t mean to do what you did.” you reasoned.
“I really didn’t..” Asa’s eyes began to water up, flashbacks of the incident popping back up in her mind like film strips of an old movie.
“See?” You wiped the tears from her eyes. “You’re not a bad person, Asa.”
She only cried more once you said this, but you didn’t falter. You held her in your arms as if wishing to protect her from anything that could hurt her.
“You’ll be alright, Asa. Maybe not right now.. Maybe not tomorrow, But you’ll be alright. I’m with you, okay?” She looked up at you, tears staining her cheeks again for the nth time tonight. Her eyes seemed hopeless and distressed when she first came to you. But now.. Her eyes had a sliver of hope in them.
“..Okay.”
🕸️ TAGGED !! : @modyuki
#asa mitaka#asa mitaka x reader#asa#csm asa#comfort#denji csm#csm#chainsaw man#chainsaw man asa#csm fic#csm x reader#jume fics
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chaos makes the muse
pair. hayakawa aki x gn!reader
content: enemies to lovers, fluff, mentions of addiction and smoking cigarettes (negatively, i'm sorry smokers pls look away), reader is a little shit and aki is sick and tired, swearing
synopsis. aki's life is defined by bad decisions and terrible habits. it culminated in you. he's screwed.
wc. 6.2k (oops)
a/n: this is my preemptive apology for all the smokers out there who i just slandered !! i am so sorry i love you. this fic was meant to be experimental with tropes and dynamics i've never tried before, sorry if it's not entirely up to standard :') i really tried my best guys... enjoy!
it started as a challenge.
it always starts as a challenge for aki — from the lit end of his cigarette to the place where it sits dangerously between his teeth. he picked it up as a bad habit from himeno. that was his first challenge; the way he'd adamantly refused to smoke but ultimately caved over a lukewarm bowl of ramen. what a depressing tale.
it wasn't meant to be anything more than a "why the hell not?" sort of defiance against the universe.
he hadn't been broken in by devil hunting yet and didn't need it as something to take the edge off. oh, how he wishes he could go back in time and slap himself silly.
day by day he found his reliance grew. an unpleasant itch in his throat, an insatiable craving that would slam into his chest and leave him breathless at the most inconvenient times. sometimes he would start muttering to himself in irritation when he got that familiar itch right after brushing his teeth.
as he got older and worked a little longer as a devil hunter, he grew less and less sane the longer he went without a smoke.
that was the second challenge; trying to focus on his jobs when his brain was buzzing with need. it was hard to stay sharp when he could feel the box sitting in his front pocket — agonizing, teasing, mocking him.
it's probably the reason he ended up in this mess in the first place, standing across from makima while she lists off all the ways he messed up on his last job. and the list is long. he must have really needed a dart.
so here he is, back turned to the door as he faces makima head-on. his fingers instinctively drum against the pocket of his pants, along the box sitting there, and all he can think is "i can't wait to get out of here for a smoke."
then the door swings open. a chill runs down his spine before he even turns around, because there's a certain air that enters the room unlike any he's felt before.
he's encountered the scariest devils out there. his whole family was taken out by a gargantuan gun-infested lovecraftian monster. but for some reason, aki gets an unfamiliar wave of horror that washes over him when he finally turns around.
"this is your new temporary partner until i'm sure you can be trusted alone on another mission."
and there you are. his third challenge.
you seem too relaxed to have been in this business for long, though it looks like you could only be a year or two younger than him. there's something about you that ticks him off. you're not a fiend — definitely not with how plain you are, but the way you're scowling at him as if he's a disease on this earth makes him second guess it.
aki can't even hear what makima is talking about anymore, too busy melting into a puddle under your heavy, judgemental glare. silence fills the room and aki is acutely aware that he's supposed to introduce himself, but you're too quick to speak and beat him to the punch.
"you smoke," is your deadpan and rather uncalled for observation.
"yes i do. and?"
you scrutinize him with a sneer, clearly disgusted.
"i don't like the smell of smoke. or smokers."
his jaw nearly drops at your bluntness. for the sake of keeping his cool exterior intact, he steels himself and takes a deep breath. it's fine. he knew how to deal with handfuls like you, like denji, like power. trouble kids. this would be easy–
"i promise you, i'll be uncooperative and keep you as a hostage in lower paying jobs until you quit."
"you... can't be serious?"
"dead serious."
"... and who the hell are you again?"
"i don't tell people my name."
"this whole mysterious act sucks. and your attitude sucks, too."
your glare sharpens at his words and you huff like a child throwing a tantrum. he almost wants to laugh at how your expression has changed. instead, he holds out his hand with a resigned sigh. "alright, alright. i'm sorry. my name is hay-"
you slap his hand away; a wordless warning accompanied by another look that makes him shrink back.
"don't care. didn't ask."
makima smiles, cruel and knowing. "i'm glad to see the two of you getting along. you're dismissed."
aki knows he shouldn't be mad at makima. it was his fault in the first place that the devil got away, and only because he was so distracted. this was a fair punishment for such a severe mess up. if this was her way of teaching him a lesson, he would just have to grit his teeth and bear through it.
he stares you down with disdain sitting under his tongue, bitter and unforgiving like the aftertaste of his black coffee in the morning; like having a mouthful of power and denji's burnt breakfast; like the tar that coats his lungs.
"fine then, be that way. nice to meet you, partner."
aki's mornings start slow.
they always have, for as long as he can remember. he wakes up just after the crack of dawn, to which denji has called him sick in the head multiple times for, and spends his time unwinding before he inevitably has to go into work and be on high alert for ten hours straight.
it's a peaceful morning like any other. he's on his balcony overlooking the quiet streets of tokyo. denji and power haven't woken up yet, so he has at least a few moments of solitude (which he so desperately needs, by the way).
he cracks open a new box of cigarettes and shakes one into his hand. he's two seconds away from flicking open his lighter to start his morning smoke when–
"i told you i don't like smokers."
aki nearly falls off the balcony in surprise, whipping around to see the intruder. you're standing there with another frown on your face. he has to wonder if you can smile at all.
"how did you get into my apartment?!"
"huh? the front door. are you stupid?"
"but–" aki's head tilts so that he can peer over your shoulder. there's no sign of anyone else being awake to let you in, which means you must have just taken the liberty of waltzing on in here unannounced. "don't sneak up on me like that. i could have hurt you."
"why would you do that?"
"excuse me? because you just broke into my apartment, for fuck's sake."
"i didn't!" you argue back defensively, fumbling in your pocket to pull out a key. and in that moment, aki realizes something deeply, deeply terrible. just as makima had sprung the role of babysitter onto him with denji and power, she has now bestowed upon him possibly the most irritating human being ever born.
this can’t be happening. he couldn’t possibly get stuck with a third unbearable roommate. what kind of shitty karma does he have?
"i... i need a minute."
your tongue clicks in annoyance. "hurry up. i want to leave for work asap."
"just go in yourself. i can meet you there later."
"i don't have a car."
it's as if thunder claps in his ears. "you... don't... have a car..." he repeats back to you slowly, utterly defeated. "at least let me finish getting ready."
you eye the cigarette still held between his fingers with nothing but contempt. "i don't like–"
"yes, yes, i get it! you don't like the smell of smoke. you don't like me."
your face scrunches slightly as you fall silent. if he didn't think you were being such a pest right now, he might have thought you looked a little cute.
"it hurts my nose."
"you have a sensitive nose or something?"
"or something."
his eye twitches.
aki very quicky learns that when you don't like how things are done, you're very vocal about it. and not only are you vocal, if he ever decided to be stubborn you would take actions into your own hands.
he can't count how many times you've stomped up to him in the middle of a job just to slap the cigarette straight out of his mouth and snuff it out with your heel. he's starting to get antsy because of it.
you're a menace. sometimes he even finds that a box of cigarettes he had purchased the night before has mysteriously ended up drenched at the bottom of the bath. it's infuriating.
he doesn't understand how someone could be so intolerant to a scent. he knew it was unpleasant, but he would like to think that he has impeccable enough hygiene to at least be passable. hell, even denji and power don't seem to notice or care.
(not that it's a very high bar to clear when it comes to them. denji once ate a kid's half-chewed leftovers off the table at mcdonalds and said it was a waste of food. aki was not pleased.)
it's not until he's known you for exactly sixty-two days that he learns the truth. two agonizing months of taking a single drag before you come over to him and snatch the cancer stick right out from under his nose.
aki isn't sure how he never noticed — the minute twitch of your nose when you were drawing closer to a devil. the way your shoulders stilled as you held your breath around denji and power.
he thought you were just a regular human being. he should have known makima wouldn't have paired him with someone normal. you were makima's personal devil tracker.
"it's this way," you tell him as you lead him further into the tunnel. it's almost pitch black. aki can't get a read on anything around him.
"how do you know?"
you look at him with an brow raised, like he just asked a really dumb question. "i can smell it."
"you can smell it?"
"i can smell it,” you repeat in confirmation.
"you're insane. there's nothing down here. let's just go back and regroup with–"
you suddenly swivel around, the flashlight in your hand beaming into his face. he has to cover them with a hand as he scowls at you for temporarily blinding him.
"no! it's here! it would just be easier to find if someone wasn't masking up its scent!"
aki's eyes roll into the back of his head at your little jab. "don't waste my time. i have better things to be doing than babysitting you down here."
he gestures dramatically for you to continue walking, shuffling around in his pocket before pulling out a dart. you glower at him distastefully.
"are you for real right now? you can't go 5 minutes without a smoke?"
he just shrugs, lighting it as he trails behind you. "if i need one then i need one."
"i can't believe you. you're seriously so childish," you sputter out, turning around to glare at him.
aki just sighs tiredly, blowing smoke into your face.
he can't wrap his head around why denji and power have taken such a liking to you.
you're rude and blunt and shameless with your remarks. if he was irrational he might have knocked you out by now for constantly swiping darts out of his mouth.
your relationship is purely obligatory. there's a level of mutual trust between you and him; there has to be for the two of you to be a partially functioning team of hunters — but even then, you bicker. and as soon as you're home, you rush into your room in a flurry of curse words and bites that leave aki grumbling to himself.
he doesn't get it. there's not an ounce of appeal.
you have a plain style and an even less exciting personality. he also thinks you have an ugly attitude problem and act like a brat when you want something from him. he always caves, too, which is the worst part — it's some unawakened big brother instinct that he never got to feel as a kid.
he spoils you too much for your own good.
don't want carrots in your curry tonight? fine. he doesn't want to hear you complaining about it, or worse, flinging them around the room with power. again.
saw something at the hundred yen store on the way home? whatever. it's just a hundred yen. if you want it then he'll buy it even if it's something as stupid as a charm for your keychain.
and he hates that you find it all so sentimental, the cheap little trinkets he gets for you. he absolutely loathes the fact that you lug them all around with you. they clink and jingle as you walk around, a clear dead giveaway when you're trying to be stealthy during a job.
(the kicker? it's so endearing that he can't even find it in himself to scold you for it. he despises you for making him even consider calling you cute.)
he should have grown a stronger resolve about this sort of thing. otherwise, he would have been coming home unscathed tonight.
he exhales in exhaustion as he watches you retreat into your room again for the night before he shuffles over into the bathroom and sits at the edge of the tub. he had just bought you a little bracelet with a bell charm on it, jingling with every step you took. it was a grave mistake to bring it into enemy territory.
as much as he would love to place the blame on you, he can't. not when you're so much less experienced out in the field than he is, and not when you were so reserved the entire ride home.
it was his fault. he should have known better.
you were eerily silent as you drove (he was in no condition to drive, so despite his reluctance handing you his car keys, he really had no choice). there was a look on you that was unrecognizable — something morphed between guilt and worry.
he usually doesn't smoke in the confines of his apartment, taking his cigarettes outside where it'll smell less. but he needs one badly right now, and who are you to stop him in his own home?
he catches his reflection in the mirror above the sink. it hits him then how much of a mess he is right now; hair disheveled and masking his vision, blood staining his white button-up, sweat sticking to his forehead and smoke rising to veil half of his face.
aki doesn't get paid enough for this.
"you look like shit."
his eyes flutter closed at the sound of your voice from the door. you invite yourself in, standing a few feet away from him with a hand covering your nose.
"smell like it, too."
"yeah, i bet," he mumbles, pulling the dart from between his teeth to blow smoke in your direction like he always does when you’re pissing him off. you wave it away with a scowl.
"that was rude."
"speak for yourself."
"you suck."
"did you come in here just to be a bother?"
your face twists and he almost bursts out laughing at the constipated expression you give him. you fumble a little with your sleeves, gaze falling to the floor as you stand there like a kid who just threw up and needs their mom to come clean it up.
"do you need help?" you ask him, voice nearly inaudible.
he considers it for a second before his eyes drift to the cigarette still lit between his fingers. "no. it's fine. it's probably better if you're not in here with me right now."
"but you're hurt."
"i've been through worse. i'm fine, really," aki raises a brow at you and your strange behaviour, "don't worry about it."
you're silent again for a moment as his words sink in. "i feel bad. i feel like it's my fault." you sound earnest about it, chewing on your bottom lip guiltily.
he exhales loudly in response, shifting his weight a little on the tub so he can unbutton his shirt. "okay, okay. quit making that face. it's creeping me out."
you huff at his words but surprisingly offer no rebuttal. you waddle over to him slowly, brows furrowing further with each drag of your feet against the tile floor. he watches you curiously as you rummage through the sink cabinet and kneel in front of him, body resting between his thighs.
if you can feel how warm he gets from the action, you don't bother teasing him about it.
your nose is entirely scrunched up now, though you do your best to hide your clear disdain for the scent of smoke filling your nose.
"you really don't have to do this. i promise i'm okay."
you leer at him stubbornly and he immediately relents, not in the mood for a petty argument. you work quickly and delicately, wrapping his wound in gauze. it's then that he realizes there's no tiny jingle of a bell filling the air as you move, and he looks down to see your empty wrist.
"for the record, it wasn't your fault," he says quietly, hand stopping yours. you don't try and slap it away this time, but falter a bit.
"... you don't have to try to be nice to me."
"i'm not trying to be nice. i'm just telling you how it is."
"but–"
"no buts."
your eyes meet his as you peer up at him. you stay still for just a beat before you're wrapping him again, careful not to nick his wound.
are you... crying?
it's subtle, the little tears gathering on your lashes. he might not have realized if it wasn't accompanied by the tiniest of sniffles (which makes you recoil back slightly with the intrusion of smoke filling your lungs).
oh no. he's growing a soft spot for you because of this. the most irritating human on the planet, and he wants to give you a hug so you'll stop crying. what the hell is wrong with him.
aki's hand plops onto the top of your head before either of you realize it's happening. he awkwardly averts his stare.
"don't cry. it's ugly on you."
and it really is, because why else would his heart be having such a violent reaction to it?
for a second he anticipates the sharp sting of your hand smacking his away again, or maybe you'll even be so angry that you'll tilt your head up and sink your teeth into him like a rabid animal.
but you don't. you laugh — a real genuine laugh that makes him dizzy.
he's never been able to picture you with a smile on your face before. you always look feral, like you're about to launch at him and tear his skin off, or so tired that you can't even keep your eyes open anymore.
he sucks in a deep breath as he watches you laugh, blinking the tears out and wiping them up with your sleeve.
you don't say anything to him in response, instead giggling to yourself as you bandage him up the rest of the way. and he doesn't say anything either, not wanting to ruin something so special.
aki realizes that there's still a cigarette he's unconsciously rolling between his fingers. he hasn't taken a drag in so long that it's starting to extinguish itself. and despite the smell of smoke filling the room, you haven't stopped cleaning his wound and wrapping him.
he crushes it up in his hand and drops the ashes into the tub behind him.
he really should quit.
there's a shift in aki in the following weeks.
it's almost palpable — the way he speaks a little softer. a little more tender. kinder. and you can smell it, too; the scent of smoke slowly disappearing over time (not entirely, mind you, but it's the thought that counts).
you first noticed it when you came home from mcdonalds with denji, fries stuffed into your cheeks as you blinked down at aki who was on his hands and knees wiping down every square inch of the apartment.
"come on man, we're not that messy for you to be doing all that..." denji complained while scratching his balls. but aki didn't dignify him with a response, dutifully using a sponge and warm soapy water to scrub at the walls.
you observed him in secrecy later that night, peering into the bathroom as he dumped out the bucket of brown water. he was scrubbing the apartment clean of two years worth of smoke.
it didn't end there. as the months passed, you started smelling it on aki less, too.
once he smoked he would shower right away, even going so far as to pull over on the way home one night and use a public bathhouse. when he could he would change his clothes, too. his sudden change in lifestyle made it significantly more tolerable to linger around him. no longer were you holding your breath until your lungs ached in your ribcage.
aki also took notice of your change in behaviour in response. it was easier to be around you when you weren't constantly whining about his smell.
he didn't think he was being so obvious in the way he was starting to enjoy your company day by day. you still gave him migraines like no other, and he couldn't stand your attitude. but he couldn't help but find your quirks a little charming, at least a bit funny if nothing else.
he wasn't aware that a very watchful (and perverted) pair of eyes was picking up on his signs.
it's a quiet morning with the fan blowing. you and power are still dead to the world and aki has just settled down to have his breakfast.
"so like, what's the deal with you two anyways?"
he glances up from his food with a tilt of the head.
"what are you talking–"
"cause i mean, i totally saw you checking out their ass yesterday." at denji's remark, aki almost chokes on his rice.
"what? i absolutely was not." he guffaws at the blond as if he's ludicrous.
"riiiight... so, you're not into each other then? what's with the looks?"
"what looks?"
denji makes it a point to be theatrical in his renditions of the previous night, sighing dreamily and fluttering his lashes.
"like that."
"... just eat your breakfast, man. you're imagining things."
"nah, but i'm not. c'mon, you don't like them even a little?"
"no."
"liar."
"denji..." aki strains the name out through grit teeth — a warning.
"what'cha guys talkin' about?"
god no. aki can't do this today. not right now. it's too early in the morning.
"we were just talking about how lovey-dovey aki's been lately."
"ohoho, so he finally admits it?" power sits across the table, suddenly interested in conversation.
"i didn't admit anything..." aki puts his chopsticks down with a frustrated sigh, "and what the hell do you mean finally?"
"he totally did admit it. and you should have seen the two of them yesterday—"
"dude, i'm going to kick you in the balls."
"let me have a turn!"
"will you two stop already? i'm getting a headache."
it's a horrible conversation, honestly. a terrible, horrific, unforgiving realization that they might be even a small fraction correct.
this whole household is the bane of his existence.
this thought sticks with him all day; they're going to be the death of me. why me, universe? why me? it doesn't stop until he finally settles into bed at the end of his long day and lets his eyes slide shut for some well-deserved sleep.
there's laughter echoing in his ears, nothing more than a dreamy hallucination as he drifts in and out of sleep. it's sweet and rare and beautiful — he wants to capture it in a bottle and get drunk off of it.
just as aki is about to fall asleep, there's a gentle knock at the door. he stirs awake again with a soft groan, sitting up in bed.
"come in."
in you walk, hands clasped in front of you as you stare at your feet. "i had a nightmare."
he scoffs, but he's climbing out of bed and trodding over to you anyways. "what are you, a child? what'd you come to me about that for?"
"jerk."
he considers you quietly, focusing on the bags under your eyes and the way you shift uncomfortably under the weight of his gaze.
"well what do you want me to do?"
you chew on your lip for a moment. "can i sleep in here?"
"with me?"
"with you."
aki looks at you like you've lost your mind. "no," he says immediately. you wouldn't get a very restful sleep if you were suffocating in the lingering smell of smoke.
he expects you to put up a fight like you always do when things don't go your way. he even braces himself for the onslaught of names you'll call him.
it never comes. instead:
"okay."
quiet and resigned and tired. and he hates that it makes his stomach drop, because next thing he knows his hand is shooting forward to capture your wrist as you retreat.
"god, quit looking so sad. you're the worst," he tells you as he drags you back into the room and unceremoniously tosses you onto his bed.
"dickwad," you bite back weakly. aki can only roll his eyes in response as he takes half his pillows and blankets to make a temporary bed on the floor for himself. you watch him curiously.
"you're not sleeping in the bed?"
"you wouldn't be able to sleep if you were that close to me."
"... right."
"goodnight," he huffs, settling onto the uncomfortably hard wooden floor. a hush settles over the room and he assumes you've either fallen asleep or are trying to, until you start shuffling around for a couple seconds. he can hear your mouth opening and closing, as if you’re deciding whether or not to say something.
"what is it now?" aki sighs, rolling onto his side to peek at you. you're already facing him, balled up into the blanket.
"can i hold your hand at least?"
he gawks at you for a second before recomposing himself. it's just hand holding, who cares? not him. not even a bit.
(liar.)
"fine," he mumbles, slowly reaching up to offer his hand. you take it tentatively, fingers gently curling around his. his brain almost explodes into malfunctioning, heart stopping in his chest.
you blink at each other, gazes steady and unwavering. then your eyes flutter closed as you pull the blanket up and over the bottom half of your face.
"hayakawa?"
"what?" he studies you, watching the way your expression changes ever so slightly.
soft, relaxed.
"thank you."
some part of aki knows he shouldn't be trying to memorize every part of you like this, but he does it anyways.
devil hunters don't get attached to others. they don't, and they can't. but aki can't help it. it was his worst habit — worse than smoking, actually.
he was always getting emotionally involved when it came to his partners. he couldn't go to sleep anymore thinking about the fact that you would have to go in the next day and face whatever horrible devil got assigned to you. there was a sickness that gurgled in his stomach when he pictured your ragged corpse, unmoving and lifeless at his feet.
it stresses him out beyond reason, even though you're in the next room over perfectly alive and breathing. and when aki is stressed, he reaches for a cigarette.
he thinks he's being quiet, and since you should be asleep he figures just one wouldn't hurt. so he sneaks out onto his balcony for a smoke, leaning over the edge of the railing so that he can observe the empty streets below.
for some reason, he hesitates for a moment as he brings it to his lips. he doesn't even get to light it before he's once again rudely interrupted.
"you're smoking."
it's as if you have a secret sense for when he's about to smoke. or maybe you can just smell them when he taps them out of the box. either way, it irks him.
aki sighs, hand slowly lowering and dangling over the railing. he doesn't even try to deny it as he glances over his shoulder at you. you're leaning against the door frame with your arms crossed. you don't seem as irritated as you usually do, instead regarding him steadily in slight defeat.
it makes his heart ache, so he flicks the unlit dart off the balcony and watches it disappear into the darkness of the street below.
"it's unhealthy, you know."
"i know."
"so why?"
"you think i chose to be this way?" in some ways he did, but he'd never tell you that.
silence befalls you as you join his side, resting your elbows on the railing. it's a calm night; a gentle breeze blows the hair from your face when you turn to look at him.
you wordlessly examine him, and he does the same. you’re more exhausted than usual, wilted like a flower starved for water. he knows it must be draining trying to keep up with someone in a special division — especially since you don't seem to be anything more than a bomb dog for makima, sniffing out where devils are hiding. he doesn't blame you for being so tired.
"hey," he frowns at you.
"what?"
"are you ever going to tell me your name?"
"no."
"seriously?"
"seriously."
he lets out a tiny groan of annoyance before he gets an idea. "if i quit smoking, would you tell me?"
you survey him cautiously. "i'd consider it."
aki runs a hand through his long hair in contemplation, looking out toward the complex across from his. "i don't get how people just quit on a whim. doesn't seem possible."
"they have stuff for that. like, chewing gum or nicotine patches or whatever." he huffs as you continue, "you just need to find something to take your mind off of it. something that satisfies your craving."
"yeah? way easier said than done. also, i don't know if i like being lectured by the likes of–"
"you'd be too irritating if you were addicted to anything else, anyways," you dismiss your own idea, completely ignoring the glare you're receiving from aki.
"you're annoying, you know that? worse than denji. worse than power, somehow." but he wants to take care of you anyways.
"am i?" you challenge defiantly, turning to face him completely.
"the worst. honest to god, i've considered quitting my job because of you." but he hasn't, has he?
"have you now?"
"what the hell was makima thinking, trying to get me to quit smoking by sending her tracker after me?" he should be thanking her, really.
you answer him honestly, voice quiet as you allow him to unconsciously enter your personal space in his rant of frustration. "i don't know."
he only realizes he's standing too close to you when your nose twitches slightly and your brows furrow — indicators that the faint but lingering smell of smoke on him is giving you a headache.
"sorry."
he starts to pull back with a defeated noise, but then your hands shoot forward and gently cling to his sweater. he looks at you inquisitively. you seem surprised by your own actions, too.
aki is forced to reconcile with the fact that he doesn’t want to take his eyes off of you. in his almost twenty-one years alive, he's never stood so close to someone before. it's taking a real toll on him.
a heavy fog of tension settles between you as you stand there, having a stare down both out of stubbornness and curiosity as to why the other hasn't pulled away yet.
"i don't know what's wrong with me... i don't think i want you to go inside yet. stop making me feel stupid," you complain, admitting your words shamelessly.
you watch as aki blinks at you before he shakes his head in exasperation.
"what am i going to do with you?"
there's a smile on his face as he says it, tiny and subtle. you would have missed it if he wasn't slowly inching closer and closer to you. and you let him despite the suffocating smell of smoke invading your senses again.
it occurs to him that the only things he has ever kissed are his wounds as he dresses them in bandages, himeno when she was wasted once, and the papery end of a cigarette.
you taste much sweeter than any of them.
maybe it was just easy for aki to fall into addictions. he was weak-willed in that sense. always has been.
and he always chose the absolute worst things in the world to get addicted to; revenge, smoking, and now you. he couldn't stand being in the same room as you anymore. not when he so desperately craved your lips on his.
it started as a casual thing; a small peck here, a sneaky kiss there, nothing jaw dropping. and you didn't seem to mind it all too much, allowing him to linger a little longer every time he leaned back in.
it was becoming a problem. a very serious one. he couldn't focus anymore. it was worse than smoking, so much so that everytime he wanted to reach for a box of cigarettes, he would end up coming to you instead.
there was something about you he wanted to preserve. a fondness grew in his heart, replacing the scream of annoyance that would fill his lungs and threaten to spill out every time he laid eyes on you.
you were something he wanted to keep. something to protect. someone to fill the silence when no one else would.
aki liked bickering with you. he found normalcy in it, as if he'd spent his whole life doing it. and sometimes it really did feel that way — as if he'd spent lifetimes before this one by your side.
it's why he clings to you so tightly when he almost loses you.
you're perched in his lap as he holds you, slowly running your fingers through his untied hair. the driver's seat of the car wasn't built for two people to sit; his legs are far too cramped to be comfortable and your knees are pressed harshly into his thighs.
he doesn't care. aki has never cared so much until he met you.
he's robbing you of air, clinging to you so tightly that you can barely move. he can hear you complaining against his lips, but he can't bring himself to stop.
"stop doing this to me," he hisses, knocking his forehead into yours so that he can stare into your soul. "it's ridiculous. i hate you. i hate you."
he kisses you again to bury the familiar lump growing in his throat.
"i told you to fucking stay put. why can't you just listen to me? you could have died. what would i have done then, huh?" you don't answer him, instead cupping his cheeks to try and calm him down.
"you're stupid and reckless and fuck — what would i do without you?" he closes his eyes when your nose brushes against his; a silent apology.
"i hate how much you mean to me, i hate your stupid laugh and your voice and how awful it makes me feel when you look sad. i hate that you keep all the worthless shit i buy you on the way home from work and i hate that you stand so close even after a smoke–" aki's jaw tenses to try and dam the outburst spilling out of him, but he can’t.
"–i hate that i love you. i hate it. i hate you. fuck! i love you–"
he's out of breath by the time he finishes getting his words out, his fingers digging into your hips almost painfully. you blink down at him as you brush the hair from his face.
he’s always so composed, even when he's being mean to you. it's rare to see him worked up like this. you can't help but smile.
"... don't just smile at me, idiot. say something," he pleads quietly, head falling against your shoulder as he keeps you in place.
he squeezes his eyes shut when your fingers thread carefully through his undone hair once again, raking the knots out smoothly. he melts in your touch until your hands leave his scalp and gather up his face again so you can look at him.
there's no tiny twitch of your nose. no furrowing of your brows. no stilling of your chest as you hold your breath. actually, he's never seen you so openly inviting.
"can i kiss you?" aki asks this time, voice hoarse.
you nod, and his whole world comes apart. he takes his time memorizing every curve of your lips against his, the taste of you, the little gasps of air you suck in as he seals his claim on you with his mouth.
"aki..." you murmur his given name against his lips, over and over and over. you whisper it between kisses that leave you breathless. and he swallows your voice, allowing himself to revel in the way his name sounds on your tongue.
he didn't smell of smoke anymore. he didn't taste like death and ash, either — he was just aki.
hayakawa aki, 20, professional devil hunter and resident cynic, who you're hopelessly in love with.
“aki?”
“yeah?”
"do you still want to learn my name?"
© ALABOADOA 2023 — please do not translate or post my works to other platforms.
🏷️ @k0z3me @aanobrain (bye ily hope you enjoy this one art)
crossposted to ao3!
#— whispers in the wind ✧#im going into hibernation after this fic#goodnight world#i cant believe i actually finished it#chainsaw man#csm#chainsaw man fic#csm fic#hayakawa aki#aki hayakawa#aki hayakawa x you#aki hayakawa x y/n#aki hayakawa x reader#hayakawa aki x you#hayakawa aki x y/n#hayakawa aki x reader#chainsaw man x reader#csm x reader
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The Intersection Of Memory and Identity
Piece by piece, Denji's family comes back together.
Now complete.
#Chainsaw Man#CSM#Hayakawa Family#Akiangel#denji hayakawa#Aki Hayakawa#Power Hayakawa#Angel Devil#Nayuta#CSM fic#The Intersection of Memory and Identity
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"Aki! I'm on a call!"
❥ PAIRING: AKI HAYAKAWA x READER (Ft. Makima)
❥ GENRE: SMUT
❥ COMMISSIONED OR SELF MADE: SELF MADE
❥ W/C: 949
ঞ SUMMARY: This is a modern(ish) AU. The year is 2015, and you and Aki Hayakawa are officially on break. On your break, your boss Ms. Makima calls on your investigation. Aki seems annoyed by this wants to have you all to yourself. What shall you do?
ᰔ KERMIT'S NOTE: So Aki is kinda of out of character in this fic. I didn't think to make Aki doing the phone call at first. But I already wrote so there's that. If you want a request a fic, then ask me. And if you want a commission, then DM me! Thanks for reading!
ʚ WARNING: NSFW, Swearing, Oral (you receiving), Teasing, Makima, MINORS!! PLEASE GO AWAY!!
Twelve days. That was the number you and Aki Hayakawa worked without spending time together. Despite his dedication to Devil Inc., Aki missed you desperately. That’s why when he saw you in the kitchen on the phone, he was almost ecstatic–well, he didn’t show it of course.
While you were busy talking to Makima, Aki snuck behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist. You smiled at his affection but quickly got back on topic. You looked at Aki and mouthed an apology. You then resumed your conversation.
Annoyed by your antics, he ignored your faint apology and pulled you back into a tight hug. He rested his chin on your neck, his low voice vibrated against your shoulders and sensitive skin.
If it weren’t for you having a call with Makima, you would’ve given in to Aki’s demands. But you stood firm to your conversation and wriggled out of his embrace. You gently pushed Aki away and went to the living room.
“[....],” Makima spoke, “is everything okay in there? I thought I heard a grunt from you.” “Humph… I'm fine, Ms. Makima,” You replied. “May I call you back in a few minutes?” “Of course. Take as much time as you need.” You thanked Makima and soon muted yourself.
“Aki! What are you doing?” You snapped, “What do you mean? I’m just hugging you properly after not being together for more than a week.” Aki replied. You sighed and shook your head.
“Look,” you grimaced, “this call is for our last investigation. I could go from an internship to a fellowship.” You walked back to Aki and cupped his face.
“I know it’s been a while since we hung out one on one, but I promise it’ll be over soon.” You gave him a reassuring kiss on his face, making his lips curve into a small smile. You returned a smile and went back to your call.
—
You and Aki were on the couch. To make sure Aki isn’t a distraction, you kept your distance. But it seems like Aki doesn’t understand your social cue.
“[....], do you have the business card of your previous client Nevine Mundu (this is not a real person. I made them up)?” Makima asked you. “Of course,” You grabbed the business card on the coffee table. “It’s XXX Corporation. Their number is….”
As you continued, you peered your eyes at Aki–who was resting his hand near your feet. You tried to pull your feet back, but Aki was quicker. He grabbed your ankle and rested it on his lap, making you jolt back on the sofa.
“What are you doing?” You scowled. “Nothing,” He replied, “I just wanted to ease you up a little bit.” Aki’s fingers slowly rubbed against the sole of your feet.
That bastard was doing this on purpose.
He knew how ticklish you were! So why would he use it against you? Before you could choke out a laugh, Aki hushed you.
“Stay quiet. You don’t want Ms. Makima to hear you now?”
“It would be easier to stay quiet if you didn’t tease me so much!” You thought to yourself, forcefully pulling back your leg. “Are you sure you’re alright [....]? I heard some background noises.” Makima asked you, making you jump.
“Y-yes! Everything is alright, ma’am. I just got a distraction near me.” You darted your eyes at Aki, who let out a huff chuckle. “Ah, alright then. As I was saying…”
Makima’s voice soon became a blur to you. You slowly became distracted by Aki. You shivered slightly at his touch. His hands slowly wandered up your legs to your hips.
He leaned forward and planted tiny kisses around your ears and neck, taking pride in every moan that escaped your lips. He went to your ear again, his breath was warm yet raspy.
“Next time you poke fun at me like that again, I won’t hesitate to fuck you stupid.”
Hearing that, you pressed your hand against his lips. “Aki, wait!” You whispered harshly. “I’ve done my waiting!” He whispered back, “I’ve waited for twelve days…” Aki grabbed your wrist and kissed it gently, making you blush hard.
“Okay [....], I have the reports printed out. Do you have any more information regarding your client's business?” Makima asked you. “Y-yeah… I do. Just give me a sec’ okay?” You muted your phone and pulled Aki close. “Take my shorts off…” You ordered him. Aki was skeptical but complied.
You unmuted and continued your conversation with Makima. You felt your heartbeat faster each second as Aki slowly removed your fabric.
“The CEO of the corporation is committing a pyramid scheme,” You started, “He was touching [me] the worker’s monthly paycheck and spending it on crypto.”
Aki heard your fainted ‘me’ and abided by your order. His hands slowly rubbed your sex, making you arch slightly. He smiled at your anticipation and continued to edge you on. You almost bit your tongue as you tried to hold back your moans.
“S… Since May of 2012, the CEO has spent…! Nnn… He spent over $1.5 million on crypto.” You shuddered. “That’s great information [....]. I’ll be sure to notify the police as soon I get my hands on them.” Makima replied, “I’ll be going now. You and Aki take care of yourselves.” “O-of course Ms. Makima. Farewell.” You finally hung up.
“I’m done,” You sigh in relief, “thank you for waiting Aki.” Aki looked up at you. His face became wrinkled and eerie drastically. “A- Aki?” You called out to him, “Is everything alright?”
“About fucking time…” Aki rasped, right before pouncing on you. It seems like he was serious when he said he was gonna fuck you stupid.
#writing#anime smut#chainsaw man#csm#chainsaw man fic#chainsaw man smut#csm fic#csm smut#aki hayakawa#csm aki fic#aki smut#Aki fic#aki x reader#aki x you#csm makima
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I feel like rewriting a series that is posted on my wattpad! It's was a csm x jjk crossover fic as male!reader as makimas, the control devil vessel.. should I post it (and countine it) on tumblr?
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Yeah ok agegaps r nice and all, love them
tw some grammar error, lil spoilers?? MINOR/ AGELESS DNI!!!
But what about growing old with kishibe? Or being in a relationship with young kishibe? Like excuse me have u SEEN this man in his recent years as a devil hunter???? C'mon yall just think of it- think of YOUNG KISHIBE AND HOW MUCH OF A COCKY AND TEASE BASTARD HE WOULD BE!!!
The meme with the cat and knifes? Thats him whenever he pisses u off cuz I know he would enjoy annoying u cuz he finds it adorable.
Ur smaller than him?? MMMMMM TEASE TEASE TEASE LITTERALY USING HIS HEIGHT AS A FLIRT METHOD (meme with the tall gurl pinning the smaller one agaisnt the wall while she hold her up cuz thats him)
But u know he would be the type of jelly that doesn't show but its there and it IRKS to come out, sees someone being a lil too close he giving that scary ass cold stare, smiling and all as he tells the person to fuck off, arm around u and flushed to his chest
Fuck i need to draw kissing him!!!
#csm fic#kishibe fic#kishibe x reader#csm kishibe#kishibe x y/n#kishibe x you#chainsaw man#chainsaw man x reader#chainsaw man x you#chainsaw man x y/n#fic?#reader insert#gn reader#BEEN THINKING OF HIM HELP (pls dont)
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aki, who is always annoyed at your kiss marks, whether they are pressed to his neck, cheek or collar.
aki who, at the same time, is disappointed whenever your lipstick fails to leave his mark on him when you go to kiss him off the morning; he's disappointed when your little keepsake isn't kept and albeit nobody knows why, it's obvious that the head of division four is in a foul mode.
if only they knew you were the reason for it.
aki, who hates makeup being smashed on him but when you run out of space on your own hand, but still offers his own dutifully so you can pick the best shade.
aki, who gets to be your little tester sampler, on every night out as you call him over, showing him two - almost identical - bottles of lipstick, asking him to choose one and at his confusion, you are quick to pull him in and plop a kiss with each of the shade on each of his cheek, and then push him towards a mirror.
"which oone is better?" you ask mischeviously ".. or would you like to see which one looks better on your shirt?".
#it's a good thing that aki isn't my boyfriend because he'd get lovingly bullied#Aki Hayakawa x Reader#Aki Hayakawa x Y/N#Aki HAyakawa x You#Aki Hayakawa Fic#aki hayakawa x reader#aki hayakawa x y/n#aki hayakawa x you#aki hayakawa fic#csm x reader#csm x y/n#csm x you#csm fic
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empty cistern
chainsaw man fanfiction: poetry, character study, 900 words.
cast: asaden, yoru, pochita.
read on ao3
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new chapter! the next will NOT take so long that it's nearly published on the birthday of the previous
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You guys. My Denji shower fic came out to 11k words altogether LMAO. Btw all 4 parts are out!
It was worth it though! Now I'm wondering if I should write about Aki next or switch fandoms first...
#chainsaw man#csm#chainsaw man fic#csm fic#Denji#aki hayakawa#denji x reader#denji x fem reader#denji x you#aki hayakawa x reader#chainsaw man smut#csm smut#denji smut#aki smut#anime#manga#otaku#fanfic#weeaboo trash#c-o-t-o
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“Wake up good morning. My love’s distorted.”
Sketch i was possessed with a need to draw after reading @mistystarshine ‘s Tokyo ghoul au chainsaw man fic which you can check out here!
#tw: blood#tw: cannibalism#click for quality cause mobile is stupid#chainsaw man#denji hayakawa#denji chainsaw man#chainsaw man au#csm fic#csm fanart#hayakawa family#my art#if the kakugan is in the wrong eye#no it isnt#gingersp1ce547
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