#Contracts

[therobotmonster]

The Fae Thought He Had Her, but She's Had Lots of Practice

Actual Title: "On Foreign Soil."

The fae was having a grand old time with his latest toy. Mortals were easily befuddled with the magic of contract-and-courtesy. He'd taken pretty much all he could from the family: several names, the mother's attention, the son's concept of friendship... Even the life of the father.

He'd taken that one taking just the right moment of his time, the one where he moved just out of the oncoming car's path. That also took out the youngest daughter and making a new neverwas to lurk in the pockets of lost time around the home.

The tricks made him strong. The sense of betrayal and regret humans had when they realized how screwed they truly were was like honey: rich, sweet, and immune to spoilage. If anything, in the last sixty-some-odd years he'd been home the humans had gotten more petulant and even easier to trick.

It was a veritable buffet.

So when the eldest daughter returned home from college, he expected her to be easy pickings. The young were always foolish and prideful, and very often rude. They gave him so many opportunities.

So when she threw open the door, and stared at him with cold green eyes, he immediately laughed in delight. His face took on a distinctively 'David Bowiesq' aspect, a trick he found worked well the last time he'd been to the mortal lands.

"Oh, hello. May I have your name, lass?" He cooed in a cocky-yet-soothing voice.

"My name is Alex, and no." She said.

He raised a brow. She was canny, or at least half-canny. She knew enough to object to him taking it. Still, she had answered, and by the laws of the fae, the latter objection did not override the former offer.

So why wasn't he Alex now?

It was odd, but sometimes mortals were a little resistant to magic. He worried for a moment she was a skeptic, but she couldn't be. Her response meant she knew, or at least suspected, what he was. Moreover, he didn't feel the painful chill and sluggishness empiressence caused, nor the crushing weight of the explicable upon his bird-hollow bones.

No, she was just lucky, or was carrying an iron horseshoe, nothing he couldn't handle in his, or someone else's sleep.

"And what the fuck are you calling yourself, asshole?"

He blinked.

The impudence hit him like a slap. She'd just given him the opening to do anything he wanted, but the raw temerity of the insult, it's artless crudeness, it's utter lack of respect stunned him too much to enjoy it. His rage and petulance rushed into the hole left by his shock, and he sputtered.

"You rude little beast, you have no idea what you've brought upon yourself!"

He raised one pale hand, the flesh fading from it to leave nothing but blackened bone, and he pointed the index finger at her in a silent gesture. He let fly his curse. Not just any curse, but his, the one he had made for just such an occasion.

Alex stared at him. Arms crossed. Her hair was the color of the fae's own rage.

"What's the matter, cat got your brain?"

The fae's confidence wavered and the flesh returned to his hand.

"Where are the spiders?" He said. "There... there ought to be spiders! There should be spiders!"

She rolled her eyes.

"You broke the laws of courtesy and decorum! I can do as I please as a wronged noble! You should be spiders!"

"Whose laws?" It was Alex's turn to smile.

"Why, the only ones that matter, the laws of Faerie, as laid down by Oberon and Tita-"

"And Titsforbrains, yeah. I was five once and I can read. I know your dumb politics. Slight problem. Where are you now?"

"The mortal realm?"

"More specifically?"

"The Earth. The United States."

"Exactly." Alex smiled. "And while you might come the land of the platonic ideal of inbred nepobabies, in the United States of America, no law says I can't call a fuckface a fuckface. Fuckface."

The fae tried a different curse, yet Alex was not being twisted into any sort of goat, ironic or otherwise. "But, that doesn't matter! We're a higher form of being, our laws override yours."

"No they don't." Alex said with a confidence reserved for honey badgers and humans of age three. "Now undo all your bullshit and get out of my house."

"Nuh-uh!" The Fae's cocky smirk returned. With a flourish, he pulled out a deed. "It's my house, I got it off your mother, fair-and-square. She traded it for the heart your little brother so foolishly traded me. So you should get out of MY house."

"Contracts signed under duress are non-enforceable." She said in a bored, dismissive tone.

The Fae started to object, but the contract was already crumbling into dried daffodil petals in his hand. He tried to pretend this wasn't terrifying. Inexplicable happenings were supposed to be caused by him, not happen to him. "Are you a wizard?"

"Don't be stupid. I just know my rights." She said. "I'm betting you didn't disclose the full terms of the contracts either?"

The Fae shook his head, more from fear than as a response to the question. Of course he hadn't. If the mortals didn't do their due diligence and couldn't read Linear-B, that wasn't his fau-

The thirty years he stole from the youngest boy ripped themselves out of his body. A half dozen other deals began popping at the seams.

"How are you doing this?" He gasped.

"I'm not doing it. You are. You're idiot who runs on rules and laws who decided to come scam innocent people for your own profit and amusement."

"But it always worked before-" The Fae ran his mind through all his previous romps. Every single human had whined and begged about how unfair things were. Why was this one different?

He ran through those memories again. They were among his favorites so it was easy for him to see every detail. An old man trying to argue Fae law with him. A shepherd girl trying to use her own word games to trap him. A hippie saying almost the exact same words about non-enforceable contracts.

Almost.

He ran through the memories again and again. Always impressed or terrified or blinded by greed, the mortals always argued on his terms, always went back to his wording of the deal or contract, always appealed to the laws of his people and his own noble position.

None of them had ever argued jurisdiction. Once one of them had, it applied, not just now, not just to these toys, but retroactively, and, from how it felt, with interest.

"Oh." Was all the Fae could say.

"Yes. 'Oh.'" Alex smiled like the cat that ate the proverbial canary. "Children can't sign contracts, either, you know."

Everything the Fae had done to the boy snapped back at once. It felt like every seventh tendon in his body had been snipped simultaneously with tiny scissors.

"Nor can someone sign away the right to kill them to someone else, or sell themselves or others into slavery."

Alex's father reappeared in the living room, looking dazed. In his lap was Alex's youngest sister, now remembered by all present as a person that existed. The return of the father's moment was a minor loss, but there was one less neverwas in the Castle of Paradox, and the Baron would blame him for its unmaking.

"Also, names aren't transferable between people, nor are they the whole and sum of a person's identity in this country. The closest thing we have to that is a social security number. And if you steal one of those, well, identity theft is a crime here."

Mr. Baxter, Mrs. Baxter, Julie and Sam's lights all turned on at once, though they were still groggy and half-asleep and would be for hours to come.

A fortune in names, first, middle, last, with nicknames and pet-names and all between, all vanished from the Fae's purse. He could feel its lightness in his pocket.

The Fae turned on his heels. "I fear I must take my leave, so sorry for the inconvenience!"

He was halfway to the door. The impact on the back of his skull knocked him forward off his feet, sending him slamming into the polished wood floor. The projectile that laid him out bounced and landed by his head.

He'd been right about her having an iron horseshoe.

"You don't get to walk away." She said. He felt her steel-toed boot, soles made of entirely synthetic rubber and cleats of cold steel, press against the base of his spine. His hollow, bird-bone spine. "You don't get to fuck with people, say 'my bad' when you get caught, and run."

"Y-your law!" He gasped. He felt his bones cracking. He wanted to turn into something else but he couldn't focus. She was pressing down harder now, because she was half-kneeling. Her hand picked up the fallen horseshoe. "You have to let me go, or arrest me, turn me over to your police, right? You can't just murder me!"

"What are you?"

"I- I'm a Faerie of Arcadia, a sub-Prince of the House of-"

"So not a human. And not an animal." She kept him pinned.

"No!" He growled. Blood the color of an oil slick on the highway began to fill his mouth. The pain made him forget his fear for a moment, and he bared his true face, something between a bug, a wax store mannequin, and a pug-dog. "We-we're a higher form of life! Far beyond anything this miserable pile of dung you call a planet has to offer! You will pay for this impertinence the moment you break the law that holds me!"

"You're a lot of things. A bully, a pest, a liar. But you're not human. And you're not an animal. In fact, as far as the laws of this land are concerned, you aren't real."

Alex lifted her boot to kick him onto his back, then pinned him again.

"Th-then you can't kill me!" He laughs. "You can't kill something that's not real! You've trapped yourself! You'll have to let me go!"

"You haven't been to our 'pile of dung' in some time have you?" Alex asked. She nodded to a strange white book-shaped object that sat unopened, upright, next to the television, next to a pair of white and black crescent-moon shaped objects studded with small white and black buttons.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

--

Six hours later, a notification popped up on Alex's dorm room computer.

[minilibrarian]

Friday afternoon contracts 📑

[datarep]

DOGE preferentially cancelled grants and contracts to recipients in counties that voted for Harris

92.9% and 86.1% cancelled grants and contracts went to Harris counties, representing 96.6% and 92.4% of total dollar amounts.

(by u/airmovingdevice)

[unbfacts]

[delicateperspective]

Hi

I’ve noticed there’s a lot of debate about Harry’s career, and I wanted to ask what you think about it. Like, do you think he’s actually fully free when it comes to his career?

It seems like he’s gained a lot of creative freedom, and he’s pretty close to the CEO of Sony Music.

I get that at his level, there’s usually more control over artists, but it kind of looks like he’s managed to carve out some real freedom.

hey! oh my gosh anon, thank you for asking this in such a kind and respectful way. seriously. i’ve had this question come in before, but often phrased in ways that are really dismissive or degrading toward harry, and i try to avoid engaging with anything that tears them down for my own peace of mind. so i really appreciate the tone you brought to this ♥

there are definitely some great takes floating around from other blogs, but i’m happy to throw in my two cents too!

so — do i think harry is completely free in his career now?

short answer: no, not completely. but i do think he’s carved out a lot more freedom than he had in the past, especially creatively.

longer answer below if you're up for a read 👇

📄contract stuff 📄

when harry was 16, he was handed the same standard x-factor contract as the other contestants — and likely wasn’t allowed to seek outside opinion before signing. those contracts would’ve included clauses about not revealing anything that happened behind the scenes, letting the show dictate how their image and likeness are used, and (this one’s actually been confirmed by other contestants) never disparaging simon cowell. several former contestants have said they’re still under those NDAs — so at least parts of that original contract are probably still in effect.

and that’s just the beginning.

after x factor, 1d signed a recording contract with syco/sony (december 2010) for five albums and a set number of years. they fulfilled the album count, yes — but we don’t know what other clauses were baked into that deal. i’ve seen theories (and i tend to agree) that if three or more members are seen collaborating or photographed together, it can still trigger the 1D brand — which could reactivate image management clauses. and from what we know, syco/sony may still own their masters, unless that changed when the business entity was sold to universal in 2020 (though that didn’t seem to include the catalog).

they also renewed that contract in 2013, which again — no one outside their teams has seen the terms or end date. and then there's the US contract with columbia/sony (signed in 2011), which would’ve come with its own image rights clauses and restrictions.

now — harry himself has said that the first contract he saw without a “cleanliness clause” (sometimes called a morality clause) was his first solo deal with columbia. that tells us that every previous contract — from x factor to 1d — likely included one. and those clauses are serious. they’re basically designed to let the label (or management) protect their investment by controlling anything that might be seen as “damaging” to the artist’s public image or marketability.

if the artist breaks a clause — even unintentionally — the consequences can be massive: they can lose their deal, be forced to pay back everything that’s been invested in them (studio time, promo, tour costs), and in some cases even be sued for future losses — meaning the label can estimate what they would have made off you and demand that too.

so when people ask “why would they closet him?” — the answer is: because under a cleanliness clause, being openly gay could absolutely be labeled as ‘unsavory’ or ‘damaging’, especially in an industry built on selling a fantasy to teenage girls. back then, harry’s entire commercial value (to them) was tied to how desirable he was to a young, straight female audience. coming out — or even being perceived as queer — could have been framed as a threat to his marketability, and therefore a violation of the contract.

and we’re not talking small stakes — we’re talking about millions of dollars riding on his “image.” at that age, with that kind of power imbalance, it wouldn’t have been framed to him as a choice. it would’ve been: this is what you signed. this is the deal. this is how it works.

and just to expose myself a little — i’m actually really familiar with clauses like that. i’ve written them, i’ve signed them, i’ve seen them broken. they’re not just used in music — they show up in any industry where someone’s public image is monetized. are they outdated and kind of gross? yeah. but from a corporate risk perspective, they’re considered “standard.”

to give a non-music example: if J.K. Rowling had been under contract for five more books when she started making horrific comments about trans people, her publisher could’ve dropped her and sued her for all the money they lost out on because of her public behavior. so — yeah. sometimes those clauses are used to protect people, but they can also be used to control them.

🌟 current day 🌟

based on what little we know, i personally believe that harry fulfilled his first solo contract — which i think was for three albums (HS1, Fine Line, Harry’s House). that deal may have been better than what he had before, but he was still just starting out as a solo artist. he probably didn’t have the leverage (or confidence) yet to push for a deal that was completely in his favor. the label was taking a risk on him — he could’ve flopped. and i think he knew that too. none of the industry people could’ve predicted just how massive he’d become. (okay, we could’ve, but still.)

and here’s where i’ll expose another opinion: i fully believe that part of that solo deal — or jeff’s strategy — was to intentionally distance harry from the 1D brand, and from all the members. not because he doesn’t care about them, but because the narrative around him needed to be “solo star harry styles,” not “harry from one direction.”

that’s why we didn’t see him publicly with any of them for years. remember when he went to louis’ xfactor performance in 2016? there was a photo of him with steve aoki. and then a separate photo of louis, liam, and niall with steve. but no photo of all of them together. no photo of harry with any of them (the closest we got was in AOTV - and everyone says "thank you Louis"). that’s not a coincidence.

even if i didn’t believe in larry (which i do), i’d still believe that the public friendships within the band were intentionally regulated for years. not because they weren’t real, but because they weren’t allowed to be seen.

🌈 freedom, but with limits 🌈

i also have a little (okay, a lot) of suspicion that part of the break harry was on was being used to renegotiate whatever his contract looks like now. but it's too early to see any of the effects of that.

to me, he’s as open as he can be — with the original restrictions still in place.

i don’t believe he can confirm his sexuality. i don’t believe he can say he was closeted. i don’t believe any of them can tell us the full truth about how bad things were — or what really happened behind the scenes.

he has signifigant control over his music. he has some control over his image. and he has more say now than he ever did before. but he’s still walking a very careful line, and i think that’s why he’s known for only doing interviews with pre-approved questions. not because he’s trying to be mysterious and "diva" about it — but because he literally can’t afford to say the wrong thing.

there’s a constant push and pull with his public image. and honestly? i think he’s handling it with a lot of grace.

💬 final thoughts 💬

i really, really hope that someday he (and the others) can be more open. and i think he hopes that too, based on the way he changes lyrics live (golden, 2022, coachella. "i'm hoping someday i can be open") and the quiet ways he pushes boundaries.

but for now? no — i don’t think harry is as free as people assume he is. he has more freedom than he used to, but he’s still navigating a system that was built to control him.

and while i’m here — neither is jade (even if she’s running a simon hate campaign in her music - the illusion of freedom is there for her without actually confirming anything), and definitely not louis (who has signed even more contracts with syco/simon even after the band). or the rest of them, really. they’re all still carrying the weight of the contracts they signed when they were teens, and the machine that came with it.

there are people trying to fix that — former contestants, people who were mistreated by simon, by itv, by x factor. but so far, no real structural change seems to have happened.

thanks again for the thoughtful ask, anon 🫶

[whyyoumad]

All rise for Judy!

From the Capital's Instagram

[colleendoran]

VERY BAD PUBLISHERS Part III, now FREE TO READ on my Substack.

[indigovigilance]

Muriel is a Paralegal, and Crowley is going to need their help

I didn't make it very far into this meta by @ineffablecastielsstuff before I stopped at the bit about Aziraphale reading the entire contract for Hell's torment of Job. Except that, he doesn't actually (as OP correctly notes), Muriel does:

So Muriel, 37th order scrivener, is enough of a legal expert to read and interpret the legality of contracts made between Heaven and Hell.

Why do we care? Well...

There's another contract floating around (credit to @ineffablyruined for first noticing this and posting about it)

Crowley has already fulfilled his half of the bargain:

But Crowley is notoriously not that great with legal agreements, or written documents generally:

(insert book reference here to "apartment leases are for other people")

So while theoretically Crowley could leverage the verbal contract all on his own, I think that the paralegal camping out in his best friend's bookshop is going to be instrumental to him actually getting Hell to deliver on their promise.

[wereallgonnadieintheend]

[bitchesgetriches]

Predatory NDAs Just Got a Lot Harder To Enforce

Did we just help you out? Join our Patreon!

[ask-the-toy-box]

Immovable object vs unstoppable force

[unbfacts]

A 90-year-old woman signed a deal with a 47-year-old lawyer to give him her apartment upon her death in exchange for monthly payments. She outlived him, and his widow continued the payments. She received more than double the apartment's value.

[fookinhellcurlyyy]

Hi!

The other day I sent you a question and I don't know if you've received it. It was about stunts and how much control you think they both have over those things.

Hi, Anon! I miss a lot of asks because I’m putting in more hours doing the timeline (like I said before, answering anons could take a lot of time because I overthink my answers).

But I think this was you, wasn’t it?

And to add a bit more. Just because they’re getting advice or being guided doesn’t mean they’re being handed the best options to choose from. They’re clearly making the most of what they’ve got, even if the choices are limited. And while the execution of it all might look messy as hell, it also doesn’t mean they’re completely powerless in the situation. I do think they have a tiny bit more control now than most people think (which is unlike them being complete puppets, complicit only to what they are told to do or not do). Then again, they still have contractual obligations that we don’t know the full extent of or how long they last. So yeah, certain limitations remain intact.

We’ve just gotta have faith in the future, yeah? They’re making the best of it, even if it’s not always the best choice or the path we’d prefer to see. The stunts could get annoying as hell (and don’t even get me started on bbg still existing in 2025—please let it end), but again, all we can do right now is trust them with their plans and give them more credit.

And this is me channeling some positivity at 3:30 AM (almost). 😂 Just know I’m also making it all make sense and continuously trying to understand the business side of things so—yeah, current opinion now.

[bakulenthetrickster]

Let's get this over with, shall we, @cursed-gardener?

Baku won't bother tapping on this one's window, they've likely left it open so he could get in. He'll quietly step into the room, letting out an uncomfortable sigh before reluctantly holding his hand above Gammon's head.

Now would be a really bad time for Gammon to wake up. He'd probably see the dream eater next to his bed with an armful of stars if he did.

[kingoftheu]

Welcome to Hopping Over the Bar where I keep myself accountable/sane by rewatching Amphibia while studying for the bar. If I ever miss a daily edition please feel free to @ or DM me to remind me to study!

Today I studied Contracts, both under the common law and the UCC (Uniform Commercial Code). In particular we looked at the formation of Contracts. Typically these include an Offer (easily revoked) and Acceptance although their are wrinkles such as a unilateral contracts. They also require consideration, although again there are exceptions such as promissiory estoppel.

Today I watched Anne or Beast and Best Fronds. These are really fun introductions to the world, characters, and humor of Amphibia. There is some early weirdness (no Bessie, Sprig is oddly reluctant to break the rules). But we open with Sprig and Anne, the core friendship of the series, and really get a good understanding of both of them from these early episodes, Sprig being adventurous and Anne essentially good but pushy and with a warped view of friendship. We also have the basic archetypes for Polly and Hop Pop (first failed actor reference).

Connection: Sprig gives Polly a candy bribe in exchange for her not stopping him from running off into the forest. Bribes made by minors are not generally enforceable, but this serves as a useful example of consideration, a bargained for exchange of benefits. Consideration is a crucial underpinning of contract law.