#Dagmar Gunnarssen

[indignantlemur]

Larger image (STRONGLY recommended): HERE The resolution on this is painful, so I'm including detail shots below the cut.

This meeting room was furnished many centuries ago by a renowned artisan who could carve stone and shells in stunning detail, and could shape and colour glass in a way that was never seen before and has never been replicated since. He took the secrets of his techniques to the grave, dying at an unexpectedly young age in a duel with a public safety official over the seizure of a rare and extremely toxic pigment imported from a Clan to the far south. His name was Kelenthor, and he was the only Clanless to ever attain such a high level of renown and fortune purely on his artistic talent. He lived during what would eventually be called the Post-Unification Andorian Renaissance. While this artisan was alive, he had a somewhat adversarial relationship with various officials and was known to use his art as a medium to mock and criticize his social betters. He was beloved by the general populace for exclusively taking on students from the lower social classes - almost as much as he was resented by the upper classes for his habit of hiding subversive messages in his commissioned works. Regardless of where one stood with Kelenthor, none could deny his talents. If you wanted the best of the best, Kelenthor was the one to commission. As such, he was eventually commissioned to design and create furnishings for a number of rooms and even entire buildings which are now used exclusively by government officials today or otherwise preserved as precious cultural works.

This particular room is widely regarded as his best work: the walls are conspicuously and almost insultingly plain, barely carved at all. At the centre of the room lies a heavy and imposing table of solid marbled stone - also barely ornamented, save some bevelling along the edges. The surface was treated with a substance which renders the stone almost entirely impervious to damage. No matter how one might rain blows upon it, barely a scratch remains to remember them by - much like many of the politicians who have sat at this table since its creation, which many believe was the subversive message behind the thing in the first place.

The focal points are the throne-like seats arrayed around the blunt instrument of a marble table, intricately carved and inlaid with precious shell and glasswork, iridescent and shining under even the faintest rays of light. Each scatters prisms randomly around the room, illuminating the shadows and often causing quite a few headaches when meetings stretch too long. More importantly, every single one of them was deliberately carved to be as uncomfortable as possible. No one in a position of power, Kelenthor once said, should be comfortable there.

First up, courting and wedding bands! Shral and Dagmar are only courting, so they have simple rings with minimal ornamentation, with Dagmar's being modified to fit as a cuff earring.

Thoris is married, so he has two bands on each antennae. Quite often marriage bands are more decorative and ostentatious than his, but Thoris isn't one for baubles and it's bad enough he has to wear these ridiculous robes. Frankly, if he could get away with just wearing his old Guardsman uniform to these meetings, he'd vastly prefer to. As such, his wedding bands are almost incongruously plain for his rank and status.

Next up, the lady and gentleman in the foreground! These two are Ministers, and high-ranking Andorians besides, so they ornament themselves rather loudly in comparison to our main cast's more sedate preferences. The lady on the left is Minister Zaathi, who we will be meeting in-fic very soon, and she's very fond of gemstones and carved hair beads - and not afraid of losing any, if she sheer number she's wearing are any indications. It's a weighted fashion statement, if nothing else, from a woman whose home province is small and relatively modest otherwise.

By comparison, Minister Bhael - on the right - is much more conservative in his ornamentation, but his robes are heavily embroidered and that is quite a lot of Andorian silk to be toting around. A closer look will reveal that his sleeves are embroidered with an ocean wave pattern, which is particularly interesting given the relationship Andorians have with the sea. Is it some kind of political statement, or just an odd choice of attire?

If those two are making statements with their sartorial choices, then Thoris has them all beat for layered meanings.

The silvery outer robes of office are closer to a cloak than a robe, with an inner layer that is belted around the waist and a loose outer layer that is joined to the inner layer at the shoulders and seams along the upper arms. This permits the maximum range of movement for the wearer. Being made of Andorian silk, which is several times stronger than Terran silk, it is an excellent means of protection against slashing and stabbing weapons. Despite their merits, however, Thoris loathes them. They're lightweight, sure, but they're still long and ostentatious and entirely too liable to get caught on something in a real fight. Sadly, they're also mandatory, or he'd have binned them ages ago.

The vibrant blue mid-layer is a heavy material, durable Andorian silk woven through with tiny filaments of something very similar to a carbon fibre composite, providing a measure of protection against many forms of projectiles, though less so against phase weapons. The innermost tunic is more obviously armoured than the other two layers, with panels mimicking an extensive chitin pattern along the length of the torso and forearms. The sleeves in particular draw attention to a very vibrant yellow flash - much like the chitin of the predatory veeg he is known for hunting in the past.

Next we come to Shral, who is obscured partially by shadow at Ambassador Thoris' right hand - and ready to draw his ushaan-tor at a moment's notice.

This is not standard armour for an Andorian, but rather something one might wear while sparring or training in their personal time. The armour takes the form of layered, almost beetle-shell like layers, layered over a long, cowl-necked tunic. The cowl is an unusual choice for sparring attire, as it provides a potential hand-hold for an opponent - only a very arrogant or a very skilled duelist would wear such a thing while sparring.

In contrast, Dagmar stands in the light on Thoris' left. Her working attire is lightly embroidered, and features large, pearly buttons - but otherwise she's almost conspicuously plainly dressed. Hyper aware of how shockingly pink she is in comparison to everyone else in the room, Dagmar wears muted and neutral colours to try to off-set how glaringly alien she is - which, ironically, only serves to highlight her differences even further.

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[indignantlemur]

More in-progress pics!

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[indignantlemur]

Just in time for the first of the month, the finished project! I'm gonna try to do at least two more drawings for this month featuring my silly little guys, but December is also a bit of a crazy month so don't hold me to that deadline!

Larger size for details: HERE

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[indignantlemur]

The Directory!

Emigre: link

Pairing(s): Original Andorian Character/Original Human Character (Dagmar/Shral), Andorian/Andorian, Andorian/Human/Andorian/Andorian

Rating: Explicit (as of chapter 44)

Status: In-Progress, available via AO3

A tear in the fabric of space and time has consequences that echo across ages; an unexpected arrival from the twenty-first century challenges a nation's perceptions and sets a most unlikely precedent. An exploration of Andorian culture from a Human's POV.

The Stars Keep Watch: link

Pairing(s): Va'Al Trask/Original Human Character (Va'Al/Mira)

Rating: Explicit

Status: In-Progress, available via AO3

Mira Vos signed up for Starfleet only to find herself posted to hell. Undersupplied and overstressed, the fighting on J'Gal threatens to wear her down. The arrival of a special forces unit led by a handsome Andorian promises a break in the routine... A classic wartime romance - but In Space.

🎄🎁❄️Deck the Halls (and Not the Vulcans): link

Pairings: Dagmar/Shral (background)

Rating: Teen

Status: Complete, available on AO3

It's winter time in San Francisco, and the Andorian embassy has just been challenged to participate in a friendly competition between the Federation's founding species' embassies. The objective? To see who can best decorate a Terran Christmas tree. The prize? Nothing less than deeply coveted bragging rights for the coming year.

Dagmar Gunnarssen has never been so ready for anything in her entire life.

Hoarfrost: 🚧🛠️

Pairing(s): Dagmar Gunnarssen & Ambassador Thoris th'Kor, Background relationships from Emigre

Rating: Teen

Status: In-Progress, not yet available via AO3. (Pssst! Sneak peak available: link)

An unusually powerful ion storm forces Ambassador Thoris and his retinue to abandon ship over a largely uninhabited planet. Some of the last to make it to the escape pods, Thoris and Dagmar wind up separated from the others. Together, they must navigate a frozen, eerily barren landscape - and survive.

Emigre Art:

Shral: in-progress 1, in-progress 2, in-progress update 3, in-progress update 4, FINISHED

Thelen: in-progress, in-progress 2, in-progress 3, finished with detail shots

Miraal: in-progress, in-progress update

Ambassador Thoris: in-progress & finished (tentative)

Vrath: in-progress 1, finished

'An Eventful Meeting' : in-progress, in-progress 2, in-progress 3, in-progress 4, finished

IndignantLemur's Very Serious & Accurate Antennae Expression Guide: here!

Dagmar's courting ring: here

Kelenthor the Clanless: here

Fancy Drinks and Fancy Duds: in-progress

Andorian Chitin Map Reference: Thelen, Thoris, Shral: here

Winter Holiday Series:

Dagmar/Shral: In-progress 1, in-progress 2, finished

CANON Fan Art:

Shran: here

Commissions/Gifts:

Serrin of Romulus: in-progress & finished (@bigblissandlove1 commission)

S'Talon of Romulus: in-progress (silly) & finished (@bigblissandlove1 commission)

Gift commission: in-progress & finished (@the-lady-general commission)

Emperor Georgiou: in-progress & finished (@the-lady-general commission)

Lt Hemmer: finished (@nichestartrekkie0-0 gift)

Cmdr Ophelia Zubira: finished (@unknownfacelessfanfictions)

Andorian Headcanons:

Andorians and Food

Andorians and the Sea

Andorian Governing Bodies & The Role of Nepotism

Andorian Marriage Dynamics & Divorce

Andorian Proposals

Andorian Religion & Spirituality (And horror stories)

The Andorian Imperial Clan

Andorian Hair

Andorian Holidays

Andorian Courtship Ring Metallurgy

Andorian Medical Professionals

Andorian Awards and Commendations

Andorians and Figure Skating

Andorians and Dancing

Andorians and Currency

The Andorian Facepalm?

Andorian-Vulcan relations pre-ST:ENT

Andorian Language and Conlang

Andorian Weddings and Funerals

Andorian Attitudes on Interspecies Relationships

Andorian-Human Hybridization

The Am Tal and The Andorian Incident

Andorian Clan Identification and Chitin Patterns

Andorian Names

Andorians and Adoption

Clanless Andorians

Andorians and Rites of Passage into Adulthood

The Code of the Ushaan and the Holmgang

Andorian Fairy Tales

Kelenthor the Clanless and Watercolours

Human-Andorian First Contact headcanons

Andorian Fashion and Fabrics

Emigre General Discussions:

Healing and Grief in Emigre

The Bulreeng Taal Beatdown

Author's Commentary: Chapter 41 - Grace and Poise

Author's Commentary: Chapter 37 - Connection

What Do The Andorians (and Dagmar) of Emigre Smell Like?

Author's Commentary: Chapter 43: The Star Thief

What Language Is Dagmar Speaking?

Author's Commentary: Chapter 46 - Face the Facts

Director's Cut - ask for a writer's commentary on a chapter, section, line, or scene in their work, or send a ⭐for free-range rambles!

Writer Ask Game - send an emoji, get an answer!

OC Emoji Ask Game - send an emoji, specify the OC, and get an answer!

Emigre Playlists:

Dagmar - I Don't Belong In This Club

Dagmar - All I Can Do Is Try

Dagmar/Shral - I Will Melt With You

Dagmar/Thelen - Shut Up & Dance

Anlenthoris th'Kor - The Old Warhawk

Emigre Atmospheric Mixes:

Dagmar At The Office

Hovercar Ride With Shral

Hoarfrost Atmospheric Mixes:

Walking Through A Blizzard

Waiting Out A Snowstorm In A Cave

Alien Aurora While Camping In The Snow

OFFICIAL TAG LIST

(You can always request to be added to the list!)

[indignantlemur]

Winter holiday pic incoming! Here's a bunch of in-progress screencaps showing a little bit of my process!

This is the first time I've drawn Dagmar, so it was a bit of a process to figure out how I wanted her to look. You'll notice one of the in progress pics has a much thinner starting point, which is sort of how I picture Dagmar in her hyper-athletic, definitely-healthy-coping-mechanisms-what-are-you-talking-about phase. However, Dagmar no longer looks like that and hasn't for a little while now. Keeping that in mind and drawing on how I mapped out the chitin patterns for each of my Andorians, I also mapped out fat-layers for Dagmar for reference. Also, yes, I know the courting ring is one the wrong side, but guys. Guys. Hear me out: I've already started colouring this. I've come to far to fix it now.

@the-lady-general  @starrynightgardens  @emilie786  @horta-in-charge  @emochook  @velvet-luvie  @creature-of-the-stars @unknownfacelessfanfictions

[indignantlemur]

So remember how I said I was never doing to do complex backgrounds again?

I lied.

I think I'm gonna call this one: "An Eventful Meeting"

[indignantlemur]

Another in-progress pic for 'An Eventful Meeting' for you all! Blocking out the shading, currently, and absolutely enamoured with the chairs! So pretty! <3 I ended up adjusting the right-most gentleman's hair to resemble some of the old school TOS-era and comic Andorians, just for funsies.

And of course, for @horta-in-charge - here's the lineart version! If you'd like a larger image or a higher resolution, let me know!

@the-lady-general  @starrynightgardens  @emilie786  @horta-in-charge  @emochook  @velvet-luvie  @creature-of-the-stars @unknownfacelessfanfictions

[indignantlemur]

🌟

OH MY GOODNESS, ANON, I AM SO SORRY! I didn't see a notification about your ask at all! I only found it by clicking on my inbox by mistake! You have my most profound apologies for neglecting you! For this one, I feel like rambing on a bit about Chapter 46!

Spoilers below the cut for folks that haven't caught up to the latest chapter!

Chapter 46 picks up shortly after the end of chapter 45, and is a much more introspective and static chapter than the previous two, which were full of vibrancy, colour, and activity.

For the most part, I wanted this chapter to be about Dagmar and Shral and how they've progressed from the early days - but more importantly, it was an excellent time to address some lingering questions that had been hanging over Dagmar's head for a while now. Dagmar has mentioned that she has a bunch of questions before, but she's never actually managed to find a moment to ask some of them that felt right until now. There is a lingering sense of strong attraction throughout the scene, of giddiness and excitement, but it's balanced with caution and reserve. As much as I had fun writing spicy content for Dagmar and Shral after so long, now wasn't the time for the scene to lean towards that again. This chapter was supposed to be about intimacy without sex.

There's a bizarre and terrifying intensity about letting a new partner undress you for the first time (chapter 45 doesn't quite count), and for some there is a horrible, profound anxiety and sense of vulnerability that comes with that as well. There's a lot of non-verbal checking in, which is just so important, but also there's the way that Shral reaches for her face first above all other options that speaks of a kind of regard that bodes very well for their future. It's very much a deliberate choice on his part.

As the chapter progresses, Dagmar finally asks a very important question, which leads to a much, much overdue conversation between our intrepid heroes. We also see more about the level of insight that Dagmar now has into Shral's character, where before he was still very much a mystery. She's able to puzzle out a lot of his behaviours now, with the help of the bond, but she's also aware that without the fledgling bond she may never have managed. Moreover, Shral is hyperaware of this as well, and was agitated enough about it to conveniently neglect to mention a few small details that provided him with a sense of affirmation without him having to actually ask for it.

“I should have explained at the time,” Shral murmured when she remained quiet, his eyes flicking down and away as his antennae lowered into a posture she hadn’t seen on him before; curled close to his brow in submission. She’d witnessed that positioning before, of course - usually when Thoris was bossing someone around - but never on Shral. Never towards her.  He was behaving as though he expected her to be a lot angrier than she was. The fact that she hadn’t reacted according to his expectations seemed to confuse him.  “I’m not angry. I could have asked then and I didn’t,” Dagmar began slowly, watching Shral carefully as his antennae perked up and he glanced up at her again. The bond seemed to swell with a feeling she struggled to name, but whatever it was it left the impression of disbelief mingled with several other very complicated feelings. It dimmed considerably when she continued, “but I would like to know why you didn’t say anything.”  “Foolishness, mostly,” Shral answered, brutally honest in the quiet of the room, as water dripped and steam curled. “And perhaps a little selfishness.”  That last bit caught Dagmar’s interest. “Selfishness?”  “I knew you didn’t realise what it meant…” A grimace stole over Shral’s features, but he held her gaze and spoke with that same blunt, upfront tone, trailing off abruptly as if he hadn’t figured out how to finish the sentence yet. That alone was unusual. 

For the record, this is not a good behaviour and even Shral recognises that. Dagmar is rightly dismayed by the whole thing. If it had been much more alarming issue being discussed, such as a binding arrangement versus what she flippantly describes as advertising big feelings, she probably would have been justifiably angry about it. The fact that Shral very clearly knows that he was in the wrong both helps his case and hurts it, here. Instead of getting angry, Dagmar takes the time to consider the matter - and her reaction - carefully. This is probably what I love most about Dagmar: she can be reactive under the right circumstances, but she vastly prefers to stop and think things through more often than not. Dagmar tends towards problem-solving over emotional outbursts more often than not, and this conversation is no different.

Instead of choosing the confrontational route, she bypasses it entirely by expressing a gentle, remarkably forgiving sort of disappointment in Shral's choices and proposes an alternate course of action in the future. It's very clear to them both that they need to make an effort to talk more openly at this point.

Not bad! Actually a pretty mature approach to the issue overall! You know, except for the bit where Dagmar conveniently neglects to mention that she's planning on harassing her poor doctor for a basic Andorian sex ed class in a few days, which would explain a lot of her weird behaviours to Shral at that moment.

This is also not ideal behaviour, and in fact rather hypocritical of her. Does Dagmar realise this? No, no she does not.

Shral’s eyes, vividly green and flecked with gold, narrowed shrewdly at her. “Perhaps you should lead by example and elaborate about your experiences with our security checkpoints.” 

Shral, of course, immediately turns the tables of Dagmar using her own words against her, and then we come to The Hair Thing.

Shral is understandably dismayed and displeased to learn that his girlfriend basically let the security officers paw at her hair, which is apparently vastly more important to her culturally than he'd previously been aware of, instead of just asking for him to come vouch for her. Worse, she demeans the value of her customs and culture like it doesn't matter - like she doesn't matter - which is blatantly insulting to both of them, really.

“I see.” Shral sighed, and the bond carried a strange kind of weight across the gap between them. It felt heavy, stifling. “I’d better ask if I’ve overstepped similarly, then.” 

Then there's the dawning horror of realising that he basically did the same thing not an hour ago. Actually, what he did was probably worse. After all, what would Shral know about it? She's as alien to him as he is to her, after all, and if Dagmar says her hair is supposed to be kept up and away from prying eyes for some sort of alien modesty thing, then he's very probably made some kind of horrendous faux pas by yanking on it during sex. Never mind that she pulled his hair, too (and we will discuss Shral's incredibly slutty hair cut some other time) - he's Andorian. It's not the same.

The scene progresses from there, and we learn a little more about the bond as well. By the end of the chapter we get an idea as to how their dynamic has shifted from this single conversation, just a little, to something just a tiny bit stronger than before.

“Are all Humans so adaptable?” Shral wondered with a narrow slash of a smile, shifting in his seat. Dagmar couldn’t imagine he was particularly comfortable on that footstool after so long - it wasn’t exactly designed for comfortable sitting. “Or are you simply determined to surprise me at every turn?”

By the end of the chapter we've learned that Shral is an uptight, emotionally constipated man who dislikes ambiguity in any form and yet also has a very low confidence level where his ability to predict Dagmar is concerned. He thought she'd be angry with him - she wasn't. He thought she'd uncomfortable with the bond and avoid using it - she wasn't and very clearly didn't. Earlier in Chapter 45, he'd most likely expected to be some kind of celibate for months according to some cursory research on her strange, alien customs - she threw that idea out the window immediately. Even in some of their earliest interactions, Shral's simple prediction that Dagmar would dislike vithi on principle, since Humans seemed somewhat averse to especially bitter things, was completely off. At every turn, Shral fails to entirely predict Dagmar. He can make accurate guesses most of the time, but every now and then shejust randomly jukes left when he anticipates her going right, and it's both utterly maddening and terribly interesting.

Whatever else he might feel at the time, Shral is never bored when Dagmar is around.

Alright, that's it! Ramble: completed! Thanks for the ask, anon! <3

[indignantlemur]

More in-progress pics of the upcoming winter holiday pic! Dagmar is coming along splendidly, though Shral remains unfinished alongside the poinsettias and the lineart needs some touching up in a few places. I was a bit silly with the poinsettias - I could have drawn one or two and then just copy + paste-ed a bunch of them at different angles. Instead, I drew every single bit by hand. Like a maniac.

[indignantlemur]

Tell me the specifics! Who do you want to see?

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[indignantlemur]

Mostly a curiosity, but should we assume Dagmar is always speaking Andorii or a regional dialect while on Andoria? Does she ever switch back to standard when with Shral or Thelen?

Hello!

I headcanon Andoria as having a primary language, Standard Andorii, which came about Post-Unification as another means of uniting the scattered Clans with a single language. On top of that, however, Andoria also has about a half a dozen regional variations of Andorii, all of which have distinct differences such as accent, stress patterns, sentence structure, and grammatical gendering of parts of the language.

Recall that Dagmar speaks Standard Andorii, and three other dialects. The three other dialects she speaks are the ones she deemed distinct enough from Standard Andorii that she couldn't manage even with her fluency in the standardized language. She can get by in every dialect, but there's a marked difference in proficiency and confidence between the ones she's actually formally studied and absorbed versus the ones she's parsing as she goes.

Dagmar is reasonably practical, as people go, and she has a vested interest in keeping her skills sharp. So, when Dagmar is on Andoria or otherwise speaking with Andorians, she's generally speaking Standard Andorii or utilizing the dialects she speaks with natural-born speakers whenever she can. When she's on Earth, she switches back to Standard (after a very jarring adjustment period, naturally) or otherwise swaps back and forth between Standardized Andorii and Federation Standard. When in Rome, as they say.

Generally speaking, Dagmar doesn't need to switch back into Standard when talking to Thelen or Shral very often. She's fluent enough in Standard Andorii that she almost never has to pause to find a word or substitute one from Federation Standard. It certainly can happen, however - especially should Dagmar become genuinely distraught or stressed to the point where she reverts back to her mother languages.

Thanks for the ask! <3

[indignantlemur]

I made a thing! This is mostly just a fun little background ambient soundboard, for those who can't stand working or writing in silence but find music too distracting at times. Now you can pretend you're in a freezing cold embassy tapping away at towers of datapads with Dagmar!

[indignantlemur]

Hey, wanna talk about healing and grief in Émigré? Of course you do.

Courtesy warnings of discussions of grief, loss, and healing below for those that need them.

A huge part of Émigré focuses on Dagmar and how she copes with living two-hundred years ahead of the era she was born into. She deals with depression, and grief, and loss in a way that the counsellor assigned to her isn't necessarily equipped to handle - and that's not taking into account the culture shock.

In particular, I wanted a large part of the focus to be on family for Dagmar. Family is one of her core values, and it's intrinsically linked to her self-worth and her sense of self. The loss of that, especially without any kind of closure, was devastating and it took a long time for Dagmar to climb out of that particular pit of despair. In the beginning of Émigré, Dagmar can't even think about her little brother Lars without spiraling. It's too raw, even years after her arrival into the modern era, and without any kind of support structure she flounders. She doesn't think about her parents at all - she's conditioned herself not to. It's too much to bear.

Making things worse is the simple fact that the modern version of Human society within North America is so wildly different from what she knew that it might as well be an entirely alien culture. The few bits that are familiar only serve to trip her up. Even the languages she knew are different now, having drifted and evolved naturally over the past two hundred years that Dagmar missed out on.

There are few things as demoralizing and identity-shattering as being stripped of your own language, and in a way Dagmar was. The modern variants of the languages she spoke as a child sound different, they use different words, have idioms and slang terms that make no sense without a context she simply doesn't have, and there are bizarre conjugations of verbs that sound insane to her. Try telling a (hypothetical, obviously) person from the 17th century that you're going out to make groceries - imagine their confusion and bewilderment. They might parse what you're trying to say, but with significant effort. Dagmar is that person all the time.

So, she throws herself into actual alien languages and cultures and foods, and she does so with the enthusiasm of someone who genuinely loves the subject matter - but also someone who is using that love to hide from her grief. Over time, however, as Dagmar separates from modern Terran society and finds herself surrounded by Andorians and their culture, she finds it easier to reconnect with some of the things she lost. There's no one to tell her she sounds old-fashioned and too formal, or that her accent is strange, or that they don't use those words anymore. On Andoria, on an alien world, her culture is frozen in time, like an insect trapped in amber - it can be simple and unchanged.

With the language comes the memories, some of the most profound of which involve food - and that's when we start to see the real healing happening. Dagmar can think about her brother Lars, can remember that he's a lefse-thief and kind of an asshole, and it hurts - of course it hurts - but it doesn't hurt as much. She thinks about her mother, remembers vividly a conversation with her mother, and draws comfort from it instead of wallowing in pain. She remembers her father, albeit somewhat less intimately, a little less fondly, and it only hurts a little.

The memories of her family aren't frozen in a kind of sacred-stillness, the way mourning makes us preserve what we have left of the lost with an almost religious reverence. They can come alive again, in a way, through her little acts of remembrance. She can make lefse and remember her brother, and call him an asshole because he kind of was sometimes.

A year ago, back on Earth, that would have been too much. It would have been the sort of thing that would set her back horribly in her therapy and her ability to cope. Now, though? Now it's not so bad.

Sometimes healing is remembering what your little brother was really like, that he was the same as any other little brother with all the good and the bad that that entails.

Sometimes healing means letting yourself eat the last lefse.

[indignantlemur]

It's winter time in San Francisco, and the Andorian embassy has just been challenged to participate in a friendly competition between the Federation's founding species' embassies. The objective? To see who can best decorate a Terran Christmas tree. The prize? Nothing less than deeply coveted bragging rights for the coming year. Dagmar Gunnarssen has never been so ready for anything in her entire life.

Festive shenanigans ahead! AO3 link HERE

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[indignantlemur]

⭐️😉

Hello again dear! I'm gonna pick Emigre, since I don't think you've read The Stars Keep Watch just yet.

Let's talk about this little tidbit from Chapter 41: Grace and Poise!

‘Women are shapeshifters, jenta mi.’ Kirtsen Gunnarssen had once told her increasingly alarmed young daughter, a lifetime ago. ‘We are forever changing, inside and out. We change even more when we become mothers, but even if we don’t we still change. Men do something similar, but it’s different. It seems slower for them, I sometimes think. Be kind to yourself when it happens, and accept the changes with grace and poise.’

The memory of Dagmar's mother was something I really wanted to focus on in connection to that. Dagmar's mother (aka Kirsten Gunnarssen) was a kind woman, if a little reserved outside of the family, and she took the time to share bits of wisdom and advice with her daughter just as her own mother did for her. For this, I tried to think about the things my own mother told me, what my friends' mothers told them, and also about the things I wish my mother had told me. I tried to think about how I might one day explain those things to my own daughter, should I ever have one.

How do you tell your child just barely out of puberty that their body is an endlessly changing thing, that they're not really done yet? How do you tell your daughter that these changes are normal and natural? Well, one way is to make it part of her nature, something fundamental and inextricable; the sky is blue, water is wet, and your body is always changing. Only, it's not just her body that's different and changing, it's all of our bodies - so you say women are shapeshifters. Women are forever changing forms and shedding their skins to be made new again, because that is what you are and what she will be, and maybe if you say it like that she'll understand what you didn't when your mother tried to explain. It's poetry and hope and ancient knowledge passed down in a handful of sentences that will shape how she views herself for decades to come.

Dagmar's mother explained as best as she could, and Dagmar remembered - 200 years into the future - to be kind to herself.