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‼️FHJY EP6 SPOILERS‼️
you know the drill!!!
you know how these start,, MURPH U LOOK SO GOOD (shout out to ur shirt again)
siobhan is also looking fantastic, i love her shirt
brennan is wearing THE shirt i love him
‘you’re doing a better job’ i go back to being invisible
milk and vodka
‘i feel like a bad baby’
i put his dice in the full moon; emily i love you
THE HELIO CLERIC
‘lord, helio?’ ‘yes it’s me’
the bad kids are so unhinged i’m sobbing
‘i know in his final moments he must have repented and,,’ ‘no.. no… he’s in hell now..’
‘our friend kristen was a big cornhead when we met’
riz not knowing half the clubs he’s side up for
‘adaine you can work the door at the next party’
‘damn hot dragonborn about to know your shit’
OISIN I LOVE YOU
FABIAN AND ADAINE BFF CRUMBS !!!
‘i’ll take a break when i break your fucking spine’
‘if your the crabking then i’m the fishermen’ ‘yeah these waters are restricted’ i live ragh and gorgug so much
ragh being so ready to talk about becoming a cleric of cassandra
why was figs first thought when entering fabian’s room to steal some of his clothes please
even just the mention of a para genasi has made me feral,, frost genasi is so fucking cool
OISIN AND IVY ARE IN THE RAT GRINDERS NO I LOVED THEM
kristen and fig are unhinged who lets them together
fetty wap at homecoming i’m crying
emily is so unhinged, what do you mean you’re disguise selfing as this random genasi to try and fuck with people
also other than the rat grinders playing the system; they aren’t even that bad a group. the members all seem okay (famous last words maybe)
the entire group immediately clocking Fig with ‘what if lucy is dead? why are you trying to impersonate their dead friend?’
the running bit about the steel factory is so funny
‘that’s the ice muffets’
i love mazey so so much
mr mulligan what do you have planned
drunk adaine is so so funny
GERTIE I LOVE U LITTLE BEEKEEPER FIRBOLG PLEASE IM SOBBING
the entire party helping Gertie against fabian
new nemesis alert
riz is absolutely spiralling with conspiracies i love him
you cannot go from all the chaos to a kristen/tracker moment please
‘tough but fair, have a great life’ kristen please god
LYDIA YOU DESERVE EVERYTHING GOOD IN LIFE !!!
#dimension 20#fantasy high#intrepid heroes#fhjy#riz gukgak#fabian seacaster#fig faeth#kristen applebees#adaine abernant#gorgug thistlespring#fantasy high junior year
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emily pack ..? class of 09
sure, hope u like her! o(* ̄▽ ̄*)o feel free 2 change anything as alwayssss ♪(´▽`)
-Mod Andrew
NAMES: Emily
AGE: 17-18
PRONOUNS: she/her
GENDERS: cis girl
SEXUALITY: lesbian, grayromantic, biaesthetic
SOURCE: Class of 09
SPECIES: human
ROLE: persecutor, middlex
TRANSIDS: permasuicidal, transSHaddict, transbeansaddict, transsevSH, transsevSHscars, translaffytaffySH, transbedrockSH, transbeanSH, scemoage, natiscenepillus, transemo, transscene, transsuicidepact, transbully, transcheater, transcyberstalker, transdoxxer, transsuibaiter, deadteenic, transpandrugaddict, omniaddict, transoverdosedeath
CISIDS: white, blonde, blue eyes, ADHD, BPD, NPD, depression, bipolar disorder, schizospec, mania, scars, self-harm, addict, violent, unstable, argumentative, aggressive, obsessive
PARAS: AAM (🧸), teleiophile (🍴), sadomasochist (❣️), autonoceresephile, suinoduphile
APPEARANCE:
art
#clndstn.zip#build a headmate#build an alter#bah#baa#rq 🌈🍓#rqc🌈🍓#pro rq 🌈🍓#transid#rq safe#rq#rqc#pro rq#alter packs#headmate packs#transplural
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CorreaCelestePriscila: puedo ver a adrien inverso sorprendido al ver que cannon adrien tiene tantas clases, debe hacer modelaje tantas horas y no poder salir cuando quiera y tenga que pedirle permiso a su padre quien no lo deja salir casi nunca y solo cedió a qué entrara a la escuela cuando se escapó para asistir a clase
y el grupo se sorprendería o horroriza al saber cómo es la actitud o personalidad del canon Gabriel comparado a hesperia/inverso!Gabriel/ su figura paterna....
(Google translate: I can see Adrien in reverse surprised to see that Cannon Adrien has so many classes, he must model so many hours and not be able to go out whenever he wants and he has to ask permission from his father who almost never lets him go out and only gave in to him entering school. when he ran away to attend class and the group would be surprised or horrified to know what canon Gabriel's attitude or personality is compared to hesperia/inverse!Gabriel/ his father figure....)
GreenTrickster: (considers all this) Chat tends to see the best in people where I assume Claw tends to see the worst in them. This means that Adrien will often extend trust and faith too far in those who don’t have good intentions and wind up taken advantage of, whereas Claw is so skeptical that it causes him to reject aid and support made with genuinely good intentions. However, at the same time this means that Chat’s good at helping people who need a second chance or extended hand (like Claw), and Claw’s good at spotting and escaping bad situations (like the one Chat’s in). It’s less a simple ‘one has a good father and the other has a trash fire’ and more a ‘they have different skillsets that cause them to struggle with different situations.’
I think it’d be interesting for a Claw who’s been working more on his relationship with his dad to visit Chat, see how canon!Gabriel treats him, and, instead of just getting angry, take him aside to explain that this isn’t okay to him. To tell him that Chat’s advice did help him with his own father, but that the way the Gabriels behave in the two different universes is wildly different and (quoting Hesperia) that it’s not their job as kids to fix that. Chat helped Claw get closer to his Gabriel and learn that the distance between them was mostly miscommunication and grief manifesting in different ways. I think it would be great to see Claw, with his stronger sense of independence, help Chat recognize that he’s in a genuinely abusive relationship and help him start to distance himself from his Gabriel.
It'd also be neat if, remembering what Shadybug has mentioned about Ladybug having a nice mom, he encouraged Chat to spend more time with Ladybug’s family, and those of his other friends, not just to get away from his toxic homelife but to observe and learn what a healthy homelife looks like.
Most interesting of all I think would be to see the Gabriels meet and clash. I think Hawkmoth, beyond anything else, would be the one person most able to get Hesperia really, truly angry.
(And yes, I’m sticking with Hawkmoth instead of Monarch, just- just erase so much canon whenever I talk, Fu’s still around and the Guardian, Ladybug’s taken more responsibilities and Hawkmoth’s managed to steal a few more Miraculous, but he doesn’t have all of them. In fact, I’m going to say that currently in canon he has the butterfly, repaired peacock, bee, and dragon, the last two he got at the end of season 3 (which is the point in the show where I really start to get annoyed at canon anyway, so why not?). So:
Nathalie is on the mend due to the peacock being fixed and having used it infrequently, but Emilie, having used it far more often, remains unchanged. Chloe’s going through a rough patch in her redemption arc, where she’s hurt and angry that Ladybug called on another hero with a known identity for help and in the process left Chloe at the mercy of Hawkmoth. Marinette’s own rough patch and self-doubt she’s going through when she meets Hesperia is caused because she made a bad call that not only didn’t manage to get the bee miraculous back, but also lost them the dragon in the process. And, heck, the peacock is just officially the miraculous of Observation in both universes in this fic, because fighting an enemy with perfect awareness of their surroundings would be a fascinating challenge, especially since you’d have to keep coming up with new ideas with each new battle.)
Anyway, Hesperia vs Hawkmoth would also be a truly fascinating fight, because while Hawkmoth has four miraculous and maybe an akuma, Hesperia has multiple allies and the ability to dispel any akuma Hawkmoth creates. So it would be a matter of fighting one strong opponent with multiple abilities they can use as much as they like versus several relatively weaker opponents with one ability each that they need to recharge after using. That could be such an exciting battle, especially with Heserpia and Hawkmoth arguing morality at its heart!
#Tales of Miraculous Hesperia#gabriel agreste#adrien agreste#claw noir#ml paris spoilers#ml paris special#miraculous ladybug#ask
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Need To Know | Self-Para
who: Mack Fabray when: June 24th what: Mack decides to go looking for information on their birth father warnings: brief mention of death
Mack wasn’t sure what they were expecting to find when they decided to go looking for information on their birth father. Sure, they’d been curious over the years, the vague memories of the man and their mother’s general taste in men, meant that they had an idea of what he was like, but they couldn’t say they knew him, and they weren’t sure they wanted to. However, it was hard to ignore that by being back in this part of Pennsylvania they were presented with a possibility of finding him and getting important medical history. If only for Xander’s sake. He was a healthy kid, but knowing a complete family medical history would be beneficial for Ned and Emily when it came to caring for him. So, they went searching.
In their search, they learned a number of things relatively easily. He was from Bearcreek, he’d been married, and he was now deceased. Which, so much for getting medical history from him. However, he did have children. One of whom happened to be older than Mack. Meaning that Mack was confirmed to be an affair child, but worse than that, the man had managed to keep such hidden from his wife, presumably until the day he died.
Something about knowing he was dead hurt. They hadn’t gone looking for any other reason than to get medical history, but knowing they wouldn’t ever be able to see him, to ask other questions, it hurt. They could never ask if he’d gotten the call when their mother lost custody. Could never ask why the pair had split in the first place. Yes, it was an affair, but it had lasted for years before suddenly it was over and Mack would never get those answers. Because the one person who might be willing to tell them was dead.
The ensuing breakdown over this knowledge lasted far longer than Mack would have liked to admit. But, eventually, they calmed down enough to return to their research. They needed to find at least one of his other children, one of their siblings. Because they needed that medical history and… Well, maybe meeting a sibling wouldn’t be the end of the world. It could be, but they had to try, for Xander.
Quinn Fabray. She’d been easy enough to locate online and after a bunch of debating, writing and re-writing of their message, they finally hit send. It wasn’t the best message and they weren’t sure she’d even answer, but they could at least say that they tried.
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Descubriendo el Talento musical de Laufey
Este blog proporciona información general sobre la artista Laufey Los inicios de su carrera, el estilo de música único que maneja y sus álbumes.
Laufey, la Artista Tailandesa
Laufey Þórsdóttir, conocida artísticamente como Laufey, es una cantante y compositora islandesa nacida el 23 de Abril de 1999, Reikiavik. Su amor por la música se cultivó desde una edad temprana, ya que proviene de una familia de músicos.
Laufey comenzó su carrera musical a una edad temprana, mostrando un talento innato para la música. A lo largo de su adolescencia, se presentó en diversos eventos locales y ganó reconocimiento por su impresionante habilidad vocal y su destreza en la guitarra.
El estilo musical de Laufey
La música de Laufey es una fusión fascinante de géneros que a menudo desafía la categorización. Sus canciones son de género clásico que incorporan elementos del jazz y del pop, lo que da como resultado un sonido fresco y distintivo. Su habilidad para cambiar de género y experimentar es una de las razones por las que ha ganado admiradores en todo el mundo. Laufey también es conocida por su habilidad para contar historias a través de sus letras, lo que da profundidad a su música. Sus letras a menudo exploran temas de amor, identidad y autodescubrimiento.
Inicios de su carrera
En 2020 Laufey lanzó su primer sencillo "Street by Street" y se ubicó rapidamente en el puesto #1 en Radio Islandesa.
El 30 de Abril de 2021 lanzó su primer EP (extended play) llamado "Typical of me"incluyendo "Street by Street" y otras 6 canciones de las cuales destacan "I wish you love" y "Like the movies".
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Todos sus álbumes
Typical of me (AP):
Street by Street
Someone new
I wish you love
Magnolia
Like the movies
Best Friend
James
Everything I know about love:
Falling Behind
Everything I Know About Love
What Love Will Do To You
Just Like Chet
I've Never Been In Love Before
Fragile
Above The Chinese Restaurant
Dance With You Tonight
Beautiful Stranger
Night Light
Valentine
Hi
Dear Soulmate
A Night At The Symphony:
Valentine (Live at The Symphony)
Best Friend (Live at The Symphony)
Let you break my heart (Live at The Symphony)
The Nearness of you (Live at The Symphony)
Everytime We Say Good Bye (Live at The Symphony)
I Wish You Love (Live at The Symphony)
Best Friend (Live at The Symphony)
What Love Will Do To You (Live at The Symphony)
Dear Soulmate (Live at The Symphony)
Fragile (Live at The Symphony)
Beautiful Stranger (Live at The Symphony)
Like The Movies (Live at The Symphony)
Night Light (Live at The Symphony)
Falling Behind (Live at The Symphony)
Bewitched:
California And Me
Lovesick
Letter To My 13 Years Old Self
Must Be Love
Misty
Nocturne
Haunted
Dreamer
From The Start
Second Best
Bewitched
While You Were Sleeping
Promise
Serendipity
Laufey en el Escenario
Laufey es conocida por sus actuaciones en vivo cautivadoras. Su presencia en el escenario es hipnótica, y su voz poderosa llena la sala mientras interpreta sus canciones con pasión y emoción.
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Nombre: Emily Espinoza
Dirección: Cruz Verde, vía a San Joaquin
Logotipo:
Contacto para más información: 0963697544
Correo electrónico: [email protected]
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Reaaally hate how it seems I have to be "watched" by people from the system the whole rest of my life.
It's MKULTRA MILBAS targeted individual stuff. You know the people that they go after?
Those that would stick their neck out for somebody else.
You know. Yes. So. I have to do a Stinkin' re-assessment sometime next week, ish, Im like "Im in for a life sentence. Schizophrenia gets worse when you get older. Very few people "get better" [or whatever they think] whatever that means, not understanding why I keep having to do a reassessment." I mean, I really hate Drs, of all kinds, I can take care of my Fecking self, and I want them to Bugger off in general. It was creepy asf. What is so hard to understand, stop thinking shit in my head, voices, v2k, and then, making me feel like shit with uh military, weapons? thennn tormenting me in my sleep. LIEK IF I FELT BETTER, I WOULD BE BETTER. a poisoned, drug, prescription or otherwise, filled body, with emo. pain, and trauma, and not enough healthy meals, and shit, prolly aint going to be around very long. plus parasites and what have you. I CAN BE A SCREET DR. JKKK. Just a herbal supplement recommender. :] {been studying those since I was 16, got a lot of time behind me on that particular interest, yah, thats why got me all into trouble, rebelling against norms, well if Punch Line really is my ..mm.. hear voices saying dont go out with her buut...what could i get out of it? it will probably, if i dont try, end up like harley and me, im fubar.. F.U.B.A.R.} And that? Was Mr and Mrs Smith.
And she mentions the Govt program medicaid enforces it every 6 months. I'm like nooooo. Even though I know it's fake, and thats fake, I have too much rage, to not be on meds, but I don't think they're quite ready to let me only be on one anti-"psychotic" umm Vraylar and Seroquel, are my two, and we lol we -- are doing great.
Yes Im a plural, also. DID... MPD.
Anyway-- I think I "actually am" schizophrenic.. Not just a Fake illness.. But Idk maybe it's just damage from previous incarnations. Some lady read my palms and said I was reincarnated. Neat.
Meanwhile, I've gotten into some sick sort of reminescensing/revenge thing. Prolly the first male "plague rat" -- Waheyyy. Emilie Autumn fan. They want them young, to study, and observe, if ya know what Im saying. AND. They dont like to let folks go. Once they have ya. Since these bastards, think they are some type of Woman Inspector. I dont want Pig Ass Hybrids for my kids anyway, fuck off. I am no longer young, and a Cantankerous ass bitch, and One day, THOSE Fuckers, are going to compensate me, for all my TBC, and everything else. TBC/Thought Broad Casting.
WTF..!! THEY CRASHED MY BROWSER, I HAD TYPED LIKE FIVE MORE PARA. Yes. they got access to my puter. UGH!!
WELL HOW ABOUT THAT.. AND....GAWDDAMN.
Note to self/other authors, authoresses: WRITE IN WORDPAD.
Or something similiar.. There use to be one that had a black background. White makes me feel like I got a lined loose leaf paper with no.2 in a uncomfy plastic chair. YES. UNCREATIVE. Like. In a fecking institution.
Uhm what had I said... Mum also said people get sacrificed to the devil a bunch more than most think. She's kinda uh weird. yes. Used to be into goth, and horror, and metal, when she was Younger, and witch craft, lord knows umm, now shes just, Blonde hair, blue eyes. And everything else, normal, she wants to be Barbie. IDEK, this Family wsa NOT ready. She was just another Handler, my dumb ass thought fighting, was the answer. I want to SUE the pants off MKULTRA ( and associations/etc, off them.) If you know what I mean. Abuse. Trauma. Mum says it happens to boys just as much. OHHH WELL. IDK about that. Shes just another brainwashed handler. Tho.. pretty insightful if you can actually get her to say anything. Lol we're munsters, I got out the sun synchronization, or something ugh.
Im just nursing a wound. Not caring about anything else, but trying to stop the pain. I dont uh see any point in living this way? My head is aching like someones been smashing rocks against my skull for the past hour. "Okay ill stop" Like they harass and make fun of me as AFAB UNDESIRABLE. Fat and whatever, though they did it um. And call me a he/she, they did that to. And I just uh, want to punch something in the face that something is God, Idk, until it stops moving. yes. then i can be god. >.> IDK, like whyyyy me.
Why all of this. WHYYYY.
He says we are all equal, he says his thoughts are higher than our thoughts, he says the enemies are not flesh and blood, but spirits. Yes. SAYS humans are more close to him than angels, says this and that, that we have power as humans over the animals, and the demons. idk. somethings not adding up. i think he's a f*cking rapist. celebrating the black majick curses he places onto children. a pervert, a predator. yes. i try. to calculate what is going on here, i hadnt known what i know now, i rebuke the thoughts i had as a child, the gnashing of teeth, in hell, and that, i dont want to end up there. AND? I think he's a bully. There's always been a man.. sigh.. tiresome.. voice over my shoulder harassing me.
WHAT I WANT: To be the Court leader of the Neutral guise. Or herd or pack or whatever. *LOL.*
What should my name be? Circe.
brendan used the word "blessed" in association with the amount of food we have. Im used to high quality meals, this is like, yuck, sort of. I wish I could remember shit, I want to give up. There are no plans, Im jsut saying "i want to" im tired of hurting, im tired of suffering, tired of aloneness, tired of rejection, maybe showing vulnerability will help? Why are men attacking me? Idk, i think they are scared of me.. Tbh. I will get my one desire, to be my true self. And theres nothing they can do about it." If " they try to mess it up, I have my ways.
{Wow, have the inkling of intimacy / u might be a d00d, on ur page, I MEAN, AMAB, and got scammers messaging me "hot photos" and shit lololol. Im too lazy to remove. if they're not a native English speaker, some of the messages are pretty funny...}
#targeted individual#mkultra#actually schizoaffective#schizophrenia#plague rat#emilie autumn#thought broadcasting#milabs
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RECOMMENDED READING
sorted by vague topic
(if a link breaks, DM me)
FICTION
Where Oaken Hearts Do Gather by Sarah Pinsker
NON-FICTION // ART
Why I Write by Greil Marcus"…being taken out of one’s self, connecting the self to something greater, something, you know in your heart, that every person ever born must experience or be left incomplete…"
I Am A Transwoman. I Am In The Closet. I Am Not Coming Out. by Jennifer Coates
Everyone is Beautiful and No One is Horny by RS Benedict
Swimming in It: Art and (Im)Morality by Jen Silverman
Clive Barker on the Publishing Industry's homophobia and J.K. Rowling from Thomas Leatham
JRR Tolkien and the Tironian Note (PT) by Eduardo Boheme
Fur maist o history, anonymous wis a wumman by Ashley Douglas
Confronting the Challenges of Participatory Culture: Media Education for the 21st Century by Henry Jenkins
On Body Horror and the Female Body by Julia Armfield
NON-FICTION // SOCIAL COMMENTARY
Conflict is Not Abuse by Sarah Schulman
Decolonization is Not A Metaphor by Eve Tuck & K. Wayne Yang
Life at 800MHz by Artemis Everfree
Para-Bonding by Barbara Genova
How Twitter Can Ruin A Life by Emily St. James
NON-FICTION // LANGUAGE
The Sound of the Feeling that Cannot Be Spoken by Polly Barton
POETRY
To Noah, From Wife, Some Years After by Jean Gallagher
Vultures by Chinua Achebe
#i will be perpetually updating this#pinned#adventures in post academic academia#recommended reading
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Unsaid Emily || Self-Para
Who: Matt Wheeler
Location: Plattsburg, NY
Date: October 14th, 2023
Notes: Matt attends Emily's funeral
Triggers: Death, funeral, grief, missing person
Song Inspiration: Unsaid Emily from Julie & The Phantoms
first things first, we start the scene in reverse
Matt sat in his car for a moment as he thought about what the day was going to bring. He was outside of the funeral home where the service was going to be held. He saw Emily's family standing outside, but no one else was there yet. He wanted to be there early so that maybe he could get some private time to talk to Emily. While it was a closed casket, he still just wanted a moment with her. After all, the last one wasn't the best.
It was a fall day, like it was today. Three years and nine days ago. He was working the afternoon shift at Critical Roll when he heard the doorbell chime. He came out from the back to see her standing there in the sunlight coming through the window. Her dark hair showing the caramel colors that liked to come through just right whenever the sun hit it. He greeted her happily, like always, and came around to give her a kiss, but she stopped him.
all of the lines rehearsed, disappeared from my mind
She was upset. She ended up finding the receipt of the cash he had gotten out and she knew he had given it to Ricky. It was a conversation they kept having arguments about because he was trying to help his best friend, but she didn't want them to anymore. She wanted to save this money for the future, she said.
If only she knew. He had rehearsed this conversation in his and he was fully about to take the blame of giving that $250. It was, however, for the engagement ring he had in the back safe. He took it to work to keep it safe, something Brady approved of, and the money was the last little bit he slowly took out of his account over the last few months. Hazal had gotten him a deal and helped him pick it out, now he just needed the perfect time to propose.
Hearing a knock on his window, Matt jumped and looked up to see Emily's sister standing there. He smiled as he opened the door and greeted her. They hugged tightly for a moment before she linked arms with him and led him towards the building.
This was the first time in over a year that Matt had seen Emily's family. When she first went missing, they were around all the time. Then just her mom or sister was there, and then as time passed, they all stopped. They'd come out and visit here and there, help him with posters, but then even that stopped. It was too hard for them and he understood. He just didn't give up looking and look where that got him.
He greeted her parents and caught up for a moment before it was just quiet. He had some of Emily's things in his car and had it there to offer them in case they wanted any of it. He'd tell them later, not right now. Not before the service.
Her mom had to excuse herself as tears came up and she disappeared into one of the rooms at the funeral home. Her dad followed after and her sister told him that he was free to go in and see the casket if he wanted. After a moment, he decided to go in and do just that.
when things got loud, one of us running out
It was going to be a closed casket funeral, so walking in and seeing it closed wasn't a shock. Part of him wished there was something left so he could see that face one more time. That one that was staring at him from the picture near by surrounded by flowers. It was a picture Matt took of her for a Christmas card that last Christmas they had. She was smiling that Emily smile. Matt probably said some joke to get it out of her. He felt the tears come up and he swallowed to stop himself as he thought about the last moment he saw that face.
They had just got done arguing and he was trying to calm her down. If she would just wait until that weekend, she'd understand, but he had to stick to his lies, but it was getting harder. Finally, he asked if she would just wait until he got home, they could talk more. He watched her roll those hazel eyes and all she said was fine as she walked out the door. And he just watched as she went down the street, disappearing out of view. The last time he would ever see her. If he had only known...
no time for goodbyes, didn't get to apologize, pieces of a clock that lies broken
He swallowed as he approached the casket, he touched the wood softly. It was hard to believe Emily was in there. In his mind, he could picture her laying inside there, but he knew she didn't look the way he imagined in his mind. Both thoughts hurt just as much as the other.
Matt didn't know what do to as his hand moved against the smooth wood. He wanted to say so much, but what was there? An apology? A goodbye? Was it all too late? His hand started to shake as the emotions started building up inside him. The tears were coming now and he wouldn't be able to stop them. At least he was alone.
The tears ran down his cheeks and he closed his eyes as he leaned his head against the casket. The wood was cool against his forehead and his heart was reaching out to the woman inside. Praying she'd just open the casket. Say this was all a prank. He wished. He yearned. He hoped. He felt like he was putting all of it in his touch as his palms rested on the wood with his head now, but there was nothing. No sound. No movement. Nothing excepting emptiness.
he said, she said conversations in my head and that's just where they're gonna stay forever
This wasn't how it was supposed to be. This moment wasn't supposed to happen for another sixty or more years. And that was if he wasn't the one who went first. The life he thought they would have was now just fading a way. The proposal during a Dungeons & Dragons campaign he had planned completely out, the wedding in the woods that resembled something out of a fantasy book, their kids, sitting on the porch of their home watching their kids play, their grandkids. All of it was now just a broken dream.
if I could take us back, if I could just do that and write in every empty space the words "I love you" in replace
A moment passed and he moved his head back and wiped his cheeks. "I'm sorry you have to see me this way." He spoke softly. His voice was rough and cracking as he did, lip still quivering. He released a shaky breath before swallowing and moved his finger in a circle on the wood while he took a moment before taking again. "Your parents did a good job with this all. You'd like the flowers. Maybe too much yellow for your liking, but still. Pretty." He commented and he just felt so awkward doing it. He knew he needed this to be good. This was his chance to say anything. To say goodbye. And he was making small talk.
"I'm telling you, something's wrong." Matt pleaded as he talked to his brother at the police station. "She's not answering her phone. No one has seen her at the apartment building. You have to look for her." He begged. He could feel something was wrong. Emily wouldn't do this. But their dad told him they needed to follow procedures. She had to be gone for twenty-four hours, he said. Maybe she decided she was tired of you, he said. Words that stuck with him for ever. If only they listened.
"I... I should've went after you." He said and sniffled. "I should've chased after you and told you what the money was for. I should've brought you inside and dropped down on one knee." Matt reached into the pocket of his suit and pulled out the ring box. Opening it up, he looked at the ring. He took it out and ran his fingers along the opal. "I got an opal. You always said you didn't want just diamonds. Too cliché." He repeated her words she told him one night while they were discussing their future.
"I was going to propose that weekend." He swallowed and placed the ring back into the box and closed the box; his thumb moving against the blue velvet. "I guess it was the weekend you were..." He couldn't bring himself to say it. She knew what it was. Everyone now did. October 9th, 2020. The estimated date she died. He'd remember it forever.
if you could only know I never let you go
His hand tightened around the box while the tears kept coming now. "I never gave up hope. How could I? Everyone said you were gone and I couldn't stop believing you were out there. You didn't just leave me. You would never." He hiccupped and it echoed in the room. He brought his hand to his mouth for a second and suppressed a sob. He didn't want to be too loud where Emily's family came in and checked o him. He still just wanted this private time with her. He still had to say goodbye.
He took down the poster from before the rain and replaced it with a new one. He did this all the time. He would until she was found. "I don't think I can keep helping do this, Matt." Emily's sister said, holding the box of missing person posters for him. "Its been over a year. No one has called with any information. Maybe we should..."
"No." He stopped her. "We stop and someone does know something, we will never find her." He insisted and she sighed. "I just don't think anyone does know something." She said. "I have to move on. You should too." She handed him the box. "I'm sorry, Matt." She walked away. He walked down the street and replaced another sign.
Matt got himself to calm enough where he felt he could talk again and he kept his grip on the ring box. "I would've looked for you for the rest of my life. I love..." He looked down. He needed to get used to the past tense here. "I loved you. More than anything. I know we fought a bit at the end there, but we could've made it. I know we could've." He cleared his throat as another sob threatened to come out. "We would've had it all."
He looked around for a moment to ensure he was alone and he lifted the lid to the casket a little. Just enough for the ring box to be able to slip inside, but not enough where he could see inside. He didn't want to see her like that. He never would. He pushed the box through the slit and let the lid back down slowly to not make nose. He checked the flowers on top of it and none of them moved. No one would ever know.
His hand laid flat against the casket again and he closed his eyes. "I'm gonna miss you every day." He leaned in and pressed his lips against the wood for a moment.
"Goodbye, my Emily."
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Josh W. | self para | finding Emily | @irresistiibles
Josh had found Gabriel and made sure that Hannah was hidden safe away in his apartment bedroom. If anyone were to go after her, they wouldn’t think to check his place at all. Before he’d locked her away safely in there, he made sure all the doors and windows were locked and the drapes were shut. He promised her he’d go out and make sure the others are okay.
He hadn’t seen anyone since the murders began other than Ashley so he assumed she’d be alright. The streets were eerily empty and that left a strong distaste in his mouth. He wasn’t sure who to look for first. The thought of possibly finding those he considered a friend once dead left an even stronger distaste in his mouth. He wasn’t sure if he could report back to Hannah with another death. There was so way she could handle it again.
All of that was halted when Josh ended up stepping in blood, the smell of iron filling his lungs. It made him sick to his stomach. There wasn’t a single bone in his body that wanted to go further, but he felt he had to. This could be someone’s child, someone’s sibling, someone’s significant other, or even someone’s parent. He had to go forth and figure out who the latest victim was.
He only took a few steps forward before he was met with family raven locks. Bile began to rise at the horrific sight. His knees began to feel weak as the body lay with the head detached from it. It wasn’t just any head though. It was the head that belonged to someone he’d considered a friend. How many more deaths would this man have to encounter for those he cared about?
“Holy shit…” He managed to utter before he had to swallow the bile that began to rise. “No, no… No they couldn’t of gotten you…” He backed away from the scene, tears in his eyes. She’d planned a cruel prank on his sister, but when he pushed that aside, he recalled all the memories the two shared and he began to feel sick all over again. He couldn’t stand here and witness the sight any longer. He began to dial the police number as he darted away from the scene, a single tear streaming down his face.
#◟✰ interactions ┈╱ 𝐣.𝐰.#{ 𝐣𝐨𝐬𝐡 ✕ emily }#murder tw#death tw#violence tw#throwing up tw#blood tw#hwevent15
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AND WE’RE ALL JUST ENTERTAINERS…
WELCOME TO HOLLYWOOD, LUNA! YOU’VE BEEN ACCEPTED AS OLIVIA RODRIGO!
PLEASE BE SURE TO DO THE FOLLOWING:
Send us your account within 24 hours.
Include your FCs full name in their blog bio.
Have the disclaimer that applies to you in your blog bio (found in our rules).
Be sure to have your ask box open.
Message the main to find out about any prior history
OPTIONAL: Message the main to be added into our OOC Blog
OPTIONAL: Create a profile for HFRP CONNECT!
NAME/PRONOUNS/AGE/TIMEZONE:
Luna / She/her / 27 / PST
FIRST CHOICE AND FC AGE:
Olivia Rodrigo, 21
SECOND CHOICE AND FC AGE:
Auli'i Cravalho, 23
GENDER YOUR FC IDENTIFIES WITH AND PRONOUNS:
Female
FC OCCUPATION:
Singer/Songwriter
RULES PHRASE:
RFP
ARE YOU CURRENTLY ON HIATUS? *FOR CURRENT MEMBERS ONLY*
No
WANTED CONNECTIONS:
Conan Grey, Tate McRae, Joshua Bassett, Madison Beer, Chappell Roan, Gracie Abrams!!
PARA SAMPLE:
N/A
WHO ELSE DO YOU PLAY IN THE ROLEPLAY:
Ari DeBose, Emily Blunt
OTHER:
She will be a side blog, I have yet again lost all self-control <3 Bringing her in dating Louis Partridge and notable exes being Joshua Bassett and Isabela Merced
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STARTING OVER | A SELF PARA.
It was dark when his eyelids parted, the only source of light the moon pouring in from the window. How long he had slept, Mason wasn't sure. Two hours, maybe four. Never more than six, though. He hadn't slept a full night through in... honestly, he couldn't recall the last time.
Lifting his pounding head from the desk in front of him, his fingers fumbled blindly to pull the top drawer open, collecting the bottle of extra strength Advil he'd practically been living on recently. His hands were trembling ever so slightly, too many pills coming out at once, bouncing off of his hand, scattering and rolling across the office floor. His empty palm reached for the whiskey bottle in front of him, something to swallow them down with, bringing it to his lips before he hesitated.
Was this what he had become? A man who could not even allow himself to sober up before he continued to poison his liver.
Mason didn't remember much from his life before Evermore. Flashes here and there of a mother he was sure he loved, making him chicken noodle soup when he was ill, playing blocks with him. Buying a corsage for a girl he could no longer remember, asking her to a school dance. When he awoke here nearly two decades ago, his mind was practically a clean slate, filled with more political knowledge than his own memories, and that was just how it had been ever since.
But he'd had hope, then.
He looked at this town, this town he hardly knew but was all that he had, he saw all of the little problems building up and he wanted to fix it. More than that, he believed he could fix it. He could boost morale. He could make the citizens happier. He could light up the town with fun decorations, he could throw parades, take everyone's minds off of the questions there were no answers for. Why were they here, and would they ever get out?
But it wasn't enough. No matter what he did, how hard he worked, it was never enough. He heard them talk, the people he was trying so hard to help, watched them laugh at his attempts at holiday dances and festivals. He took in their criticism, some constructive, most not, picking apart every move he made. He felt the eyes on him. He knew of the gossip, whispered rumors he could deny until he was blue in the face without changing a thing. He took it in, he took it on. And he let it break him down word by word.
He had been weak then, pathetic. But he had been something.
The alcohol bottle lowered slowly, Mason felt a growing lump in his throat, one brought on by more than the nausea that would surely show itself if he had anything on his stomach. What had he become? What had happened to that smiling man, tired and stressed but optimistic? When he thought of the way Emily stared at him at the party, the tears that rolled down Catherine's cheeks the last time they spoke, it made his own bloodshot eyes sting with their own. He had disappointed them. He had disappointed everyone. Even himself.
This was not what he wanted to be. A hollow shell of a person, so consumed with being perfect he'd allowed himself to become nothing.
Dropping the three remaining Advill, he moved his fingers to the computer in front of him, wincing as the bright light took over the monitor. Pulling up the browser, with trembling fingers he typed into the search bar: AA meetings near me.
#tw alcohol#tw.... sadness ???#& self para.#this was supposed to be written and posted like 2 weeks ago
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[Note this para is trans masc & is the self insert of a fictive alter be sane and don't outright be weird]
gonna explain top to bottom left to right
Ribs Emily / Mike Afton / Eggs [He/Rots]
[me looking at canon] yea im only taking bits
Now- This is how he chooses to look currently! but can choose to look like any previous version shown, though really only does the first four on the top.
Mult- This is the man the legend, basically helping others in different worlds
Retry d3- You've gotten another chance at your life, how will you change fate?
Woken- You remembered what happened, and you're kind of a jerk but under all that you're alot kinder
Reawaken - After you died, for some reason you came back. Though your memories are fuzzy. you remember being.. A butcher you think..? All you remember is a knife
Fnaf 6- he lost his right arm that's the noticable bit, and also is more decayed so he just doesn't show much of his actual skin. Though Jack gives him tips on how to deal with this state.
SLT+ - yea he got scoop'd, bro is a corpse.
Adult- THIS IS mislabeled bcs i was going to have another teen inbetween but ended up scrapping it. He's trying to look into his father's crimes, and find out what really happened. His right eye did regain some sight, which was... Odd. Really got him into investigating.
Teen-B - Heavily withdrawn from peers, the childhood abuse really started here. Plays sports to try to get out his aggression, and also enjoys tinkering & gaming. Doesn't help that the old gang disbanded, Gane having to move away to an unknown place, Jack having to take care of his younger sibling after the car accident, and John having moved away. His right eye was blinded, and has nightmares. Though someone he used to bully has noticed his shift in behavior and choses to be by his side [its jeremy]
Teen-A - This is post social transistioning, and his start of T. About to make the biggest mistake. Him and his ragtag group of rowdy teens with teenage edge were terrors. Gane was the bonnie mask who he met while quite ill, John the chica mask'd was assigned chica as a joke of their first meeting and Jack the freddy mask'd yea he's a terror too
Kid - This is pre-transistion, how he was as a kid! The charlie/charlotte similarities are intentional <3. Was a sickly child.
edit: rIBS SPEAKING I FORGOT TO SAY I DATE JEREMY... jeremike is canon
the lore for jeremy is wilder than mine <333
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Emily Ratajkowski brilha em vestidos de noite de autorretrato
JOANA ELISABETE Emily Ratajkowski estrela a campanha de moda noturna Self-Portrait. Foto: Nick Waplington O epítome do glamour moderno, Emily Ratajkowski retorna para enfeitar a mais nova campanha publicitária da Self-Portrait , desta vez destacando roupas de noite perfeitas para as próximas festas de fim de ano . Anteriormente nos cativando na coleção resort 2024 da marca , a colaboração atual…
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tvrundown USA 2023.09.08
Friday, September 8th: ~ National Service Dog Month ~
(exclusive): Underdeveloped (TUBI, mockumentary series premiere, all 4 eps), Tiny Toons Looniversity (MAX, animated series premiere, all 10 eps), Burning Body (netflix, Spanish limited series, all 8 eps), A Time Called You (netflix, Korean romantic fantasy, all 12 eps), Pokémon Ultimate Journeys: "To Be a Pokémon Master" (netflix, spinoff, all 12 eps), Spy Ops (netflix, intelligence reality insider stories, all 8 eps), Star Trek: "very Short Treks" (at startrek.com online, all 5 animated shorts)
(movies): "Blood Flower" (Shudder, Malaysian horror, ~100mins), "Rosa Peral's Tapes" (netflix, Spanish true-crime documentary, 80mins), "Sitting in Bars with Cake" (amazon, friendship dramedy, 2hrs), "How to Date Billy Walsh" (amazon, teen rom-com, delayed until 2024), "Self Reliance" (hulu, genre-bending comedy-thriller, delayed until November)
(streaming weekly): The Changeling (apple+, series premiere, first 3 eps), Foundation (apple+, penultimate), Shelter (amazon), The Wheel of Time (amazon), Dreaming Whilst Black (Para+, series premiere, first 2 eps)
(specials): "Star Trek Day 2023" (COM|MTV2, special, ~30mins), Star Trek: Strange New Worlds (CBS, broadcast premiere, first 2 eps), The Last Drive-in (Shudder, "Live From the Jamboree" with Joe Bob Briggs)
(original made-for-TV movies): "The Kept Mistress Killer" (LIFE, 2hrs+), "Guiding Emily" (HMM, 2hrs)
(hour 1): Power (Book IV): Force (Starz)
(hour 2): Minx (Starz, 35mins, season 2 finale)
(hour 3): Heels (Starz)
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A Love Letter to FASA (and SZA’s Album) || Emily Paras, FASA’s 2022 - 2023 Media Chair
Dear FASA,
When I think about all the things in life that I could talk passionately about for hours and hours, FASA and SZA’s album, Ctrl, are the first things that come to my mind. The impact that these two things have had on my journey of self-love and owning my identity has been immeasurable.
the person behind the camera!
1. “SUPERMODEL”
a song that reminds me of how much I’ve grown
I grew up in a small, predominantly white town in the middle of Michigan notorious for its ties to a white supremacist group. As a second-generation Filipino American, I felt disconnected from both my hometown and the Filipino community. I also grew up as the eldest with two younger brothers, so I was left to navigate many things by myself and became the family guinea pig. My parents tried to teach me Tagalog at the same time I was learning English, but I never picked it up. Other than indulging in Filipino dishes and wearing polka dots for the New Year, my parents never really pushed my brothers and I to learn more about our identities. Additionally, our Filipino friend groups were at least an hour away from us, so I struggled feeling close to those communities of Filipinos. It was hard for me to find opportunities to engage with my culture, and even harder for me to find the motivation to explore it on my own.
#BILOG
I remember writing about FASA in one of my University of Michigan application essays and being so excited to join. But in the beginning, I had an extremely hard time getting myself to attend events and meet new people. Seriously – I couldn’t even get myself to go to the Fall Mass Meeting. The Fall FAM/Lineage reveal was one of the only events I attended that semester. The number of people I could name in FASA at the time was a number I could count on my hands. (I even had mistaken Nate for Josh at one point…) I knew that FASA was something I wanted to be a part of, and yes, I am a pretty shy person with a very short lasting social battery, but truthfully I was nervous that I wasn’t “Filipino enough” because of the little exposure I had in my upbringing. Eventually, with enough encouragement from people around me, I brought myself to apply for the intern program at the end of my fall semester of freshman year and my silly little journey in FASA began.
2. “PROM”
a song that reminds me to live in the moment
rare photo of media chair!
The role of Media Chair can be overwhelming and rewarding at the same time. There is so much behind the scenes work that many people may not think about.
From sorting through hundreds of photos that I take at each event, to fixing every formatting issue in the newsletter platform, to creating several versions of a simple graphic because of my indecisiveness, so much goes into the Media Chair position that often gets overlooked. At the same time, you immediately see the result of the hours of work you put into a post with all the likes, reposts, and comments. But it truly is more than just the numbers – it’s about being able to engage and excite people with their culture and community.
Media Chair has been such an amazing way for me to express myself creatively as well. You have so much creative freedom with this position, and I especially enjoyed creating and incorporating reels and TikToks to highlight FASA's members into this year’s social media posts.
This position has also helped me connect with so many people from our community. And yes, as Media, one of your main responsibilities is to take photos, but I highly encourage stepping away from the camera for a second and taking a moment to introduce yourself to a new face or strike up a chat with another member. Media is so important in bridging the generational gap the gap between e-board and the greater FASA community in a number of ways, so don’t be afraid to take a second to say hi!
In order to effectively engage and connect with people, you have to know your audience. This year, I started to include image descriptions with FASA's posts on Instagram. It is important to recognize that being in this position with over 1,100 followers, not everyone accesses social media the same, and that we must take steps towards making our platform as accessible and inclusive as possible.
Creating the Yearbook Committee was another vision I was proud to make happen. Our committee’s goal is create a physical little keepsake that recaps FASA events for the 2022 - 2023 school year. It makes me so incredibly happy to see other FASA members get excited to create something that will spark the same excitement in our community and give members something to physically look back on.
3. “20 SOMETHING”
a song that reminds me it’s okay to not have everything figured out and keeps me hopeful for the future
when can’t hang lin did in fact (haha get it) couldn’t hang at FACT
meedja meesh and media milly :)
Some words of advice and thank yous:
To future board:
I am so excited to see what you all will accomplish! Continue to show the FASA community so much passion and love through everything you do, and board will be one of the most rewarding experiences. Also recognize that things can and will get stressful. Know your limits and boundaries and be able to take a step back when needed. Board burnout is so very real, so please, please, please, prioritize your health and wellbeing. Most importantly, look out for one another and support each other in every aspect. You are a board member first, and your chair position second.
To current board:
Thank you for supporting me through some incredibly busy semesters and rough patches. From having to repost our new board announcement at least 4 times because I spelt Ashley’s name as “Ashely” and Christian’s slide accidentally being duplicated and contemplating on whether or not I delete Instagram, to not realizing my SD card was out of space and forgetting to bring a backup one to our board photoshoot, you have continuously been there for me. You are some of the most hardworking people I know and your dedication to our community is so inspiring and infectious. I am so proud of each and every one of you and I hope you are proud of yourselves as well. I couldn’t have asked for a better group of people to take over (in a wholesome, non-malicious way!) FASA with. It has been such an honor to work alongside you all. (Also, PLEASE FIX YOUR SLEEP SCHEDULES!!)
To FASA:
Thank you for offering a space for me to grow as an individual and own my identity. It’s been said countless times, but it truly is the people that make FASA so unique. There is no one thing that defines someone as Filipino. You are enough in the ways that you choose to explore and engage with your identity. And to the people who have been afraid to attend FASA events, or worry that you aren’t “Filipino enough”, I have been there and I totally understand. I encourage you to take that step out of your comfort zone and attend a FASA event or two. Being a part of FASA will be an unforgettable part of my undergraduate career, and I hope to always have a community that is as welcoming and inclusive as FASA in the future.
To Michelle:
You are one of the main reasons I became more involved with FASA and why I ended up applying to the intern program event after not being present for majority of fall semester and why I ultimately decided to run for Media Chair. I remember when I had met you for the second (?) time in October at my cousin’s house (which also happened to be the same night I had mistaken Nate for Josh…). I was so certain that no one from FASA remembered my name. But you did, and I was so surprised. You talked about FASA, the intern program, and being Media Chair, and I thought you were the coolest person ever. Even after that night had passed, I still thought about how you remembered who I was. When I was spending hours debating on whether or not I apply to the intern program, whether or not I apply for Media Chair, I would think back to that night. It seems silly but you made me feel so seen. I wanted to do the same for others as Media Chair as you did for me -- to make people feel seen, heard, and represented. Thank you for everything :')
(And to SZA: I AM LITERALLY YOUR NUMBER ONE FAN thank you for putting out an album that has stuck with me since the end of eighth grade)
the most awesome epic cool fun and safe board
Before this becomes a five page essay, I will end with a silly little poem:
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
FASA says that IAmFilAm,
And you are too!
But for real, words could never describe how much FASA means to me and how incredible this silly little experience on e-board as Media Chair has been. I am forever grateful to have served (served!) the FASA community and I can’t wait to see where things will go next. Good luck to the future boardies and remember that you always have me as a resource!
Mahal kita,
Media Milly
4. “GO GINA”
a song that reminds me to live life fun and safe! :P
proud to serve
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went to the BIR with Ms. Ann today to meet with the examiner. Hinatid kami ni boss sa elevator tapos sinabi niya "kaya na ni keysi yan" tapos ayun, while in the car di kami nag uusap ni ms. Ann, pero it felt like i was not obliged to do so. Tamang behavior ako sa part na may dala akong envelope tapos sabi ni ms. Ann "ano laman niyan" sabi ko "yung sec cert po" tapos parang nagbrighten yung eyes niya tapos "ay sec cert? Oo nga no" nakasmile siya behind her facemask. Im flattered doon pa lang HAHA. Tapos yun, dumating kami sa BIR, I was tensed a bit pero not that tensed dahil iniisip ko na maganda ako sa outfit ko xD naiisip ko if enough na ba nabasa ko kasi baka bigla ako tanungin. Lumipas ang mga minuto, eye contact lang naman ginawa ko don. Gulat nga ko na maayos sila kausap. Nakabalik na kami ng 12:30 sa office, hinatid kami nila Ms. Emily papuntang office. Tapos 30 mins lang ako naglunch same with ms. Ann. Tapos maya maya pinatawag ulit ako ni Ms. Ann para sana irevise yung summary ng exposures. Kaso siya na gumawa haha. Parang tinignan ko lang siya na gawin yon sa screen niya. Tapos pagbalik nila boss, pumunta siya agad samin ni ms. Ann, kinumusta niya nangyari. Sabi niya "ano di kayo pinagbigyan ano" sabi ni Ms. Ann, "hindi boss, maayos nga sila kausap, paulit uli sinasabi nung chief, malaki ba yang pinag uusapan natin? Kung hindi naman hayaan mo na, aalisin na lang wag na natin pag-usapan." Tapos si boss di makapaniwala na ganon yung turn out. Ang ineexpect niya kasi negative ang outcome. Tapos sabi niya, "aba ang galing niyo ah, ibang klase charming-- charm niyo." Tapos ngumiti lang si ms. Ann. Ako di ako tumitingin kasi nasa likod ko lang siya.
Tapos maya maya, may sinasabi si boss na dahil daw sakin kaya naging ganon. It was lyk "dapat pala lagi kasama si keysi pag kaharap BIR, siya yata ang lucky charm" basta something like dat. Tapos nasabi ko kay ms. Ann na nakita ko yung amount ng drafted na fdda, yung 2nd page lang kasi ang pinapicturan nila. Sabi ko "ay ms. Ann, nakita ko po pala yung drfted na fdda, nasa 832 (binuklat ang notes) ay 823,399.72 po pala" tapos pinakita ko notes ko. Sabi ko "di ko po sure kung ayan na yon, pero ayan po naakabold na amount due." Tapos nagbrigthen na naman eyes niya. Sabi niya "may picture ka? Napicturan mo?" Sabi ko "hindi na po ms ann, yung 2nd page lang po kasi pinapicturean, baka magalit sila pag pinicturan ko. Kaya sinulat ko na lang po."
Tapos yun, sinabi niya rin kay boss. Shookedt ako sabi niya "nakita pala ni kasey boss, yung amount ng draft na fdda." Tapos tumingin si Ms. Ann sakin parang sinasabi niya na "sige sabihin mo go ahead." Tapos sinabi ko amount. Nakita ko naman na huminto si boss para makinig. Tapos after ko sabihin sabi niya "ang bilis ng mata ni keysi!" Lakas ng boses niya as if pinagmamalaki niya HAHAHA pero i wont read on it too much. Tapos ayun, nag usap na kami ulit ni Ms. Ann, tapos nasa office na si boss si Ms. Jai, nagpaalam na aalis siya punta rin BIR. tapos nung nandon na siya kay boss sabi ni Boss, "baka kailangan mo rin isama si keysi, siya yata ang lucky charm eh/siya yata ang may dala ng swerte" chuchu ekek. Nagreax ako ng ano yun at luh pero sana di narinig no ms. AnnHAHAHAHA nakakaflatter pero di pa rin nagbabago ang isip ko. Nakakaboost pa rin ng self esteem.
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