#GODDAMN IT BITCH IMMA FUCK U TOO DONE WORRY

[i-idontunderstand-things]

Transcript of 1 Man 100 Accents

I took far too long to do this, but.... it’s done now so I may as well post it. This will help me remember my fave video when it’s deleted :) 

Mark: Argentina. Ethan: Argentina. Capital of the world. When you think of Argentina you think,,,, whO WOULD GO THERE?? *giggling* Mark: I was more lookin for an accent,, more than anything,, Ethan: OH, accent, accent. Mkay, re-run. *twirls finger in air* Mark: Austria. Ethan: Austria.        Ehy mayte-  whlcum tu Aughstria - Mark: Oh god… Ethan: wAIGHT for it though,,, Mark: *laughter* Ethan: Waight until I tell yew,, the country of Aughstria,, k?? We were invited by Gehrmay dyuring the world War Twooooo,,, one??? *laughter* Then Poulanghd said “hay,, how bout we help yu out!” They came oughva, we came oughva, we had a cuppa tea as we do In Austria,,, We said “oY, Germany, mAYBE,, dONT!” N that’s when it oll ‘appened. They kicked out, and I said, “Naw, naw naw, not in the northern hemisphere, gough down to the buttom, the buttom bitch o’ the barrel.” So we went and said hello to the Australians! Commonly miscommunicated with the Austrians. BUT,, we’re not them, they’re not us.         BAck in Austria we go! Roight next to,,, GERMANY, roight next tu Pouland, r- rOIGHT next to France. Mark: Wh- what are you talking about?? *laughter* All  Iwas asking for was an accent you,,, goddamn travesty,,, you human train wreck, you cant keep one train of thought- Ethan: *waggles finger* Next one, next one- Mark: Uhhh, paupa new Guinea Ethan: *looks down* Pff-  couldn’t even tell you where that is- Mark: H- It’s funny cuz I don’t need you to-  

*laughter*

Ethan: Paupa New guinea, I think, sounds-- when I think of it-- I go “PapWAH new guinea”-  which makes me think that they might be Frennnnch…      mghh,,,     HEGLLUOGHHH-  

*both burst out laughing*

Ethan: Weglcome to Paupa New guinea. *laughter* Same as Austria---  We hagve a very similar accents to Austria!!       Wglhcoooome-  t0--  

*laughter*

Ethan: Give me one,, that really hits home- Mark: uhhh, Cuba? Ethan: Cyooba. Mark: *w h e e z e* Ethan: Capital of the cigahr- Mark: *w h e  e z e*

*laughter*

Ethan: When yu think of Cyooba,,

*L A U GH T E R*  

Ethan: When yu think of Cyooba, yu think,,, pghyooo, phyooogh, pghgoo, egl caystro, and his ssssensitive,,,, ssss,, sssIGNATURE mustache- Mark: *losing his shit* Ethan:  Yu tink of the way that he burned the money, to keep his daughter warm at night-

*demonic noises*

He was makin 3, 4, 5, 6, MILLION DOLLARS A dAY,,, selling cohcaine,, in the united states of america!!  Now, when you think, “hey, that’s not vehry cüül,” that’s when we had to embargainze them. Mark: *wheeze* Ethan: We said, “Ey Cyooba!! Back it off a little bit!! We can’t come near you, you can’t come near me, dat’s why we can’t have a shweet shweet smohky pohky,,,, anymore-”  but now- the embargus has been lifted- an’ we can go back to motherland Cyooba- and get our sweet, h o t cigars.  Widen our mouths- and we’ll go- *sucks invisibe cigar*    *coughs*  and that’s ‘ow you know-   it’s a true hghuu---  human cigar.

*laughter*

Mark: I--  I don’t understand what happens in your brain-- *laughter* it doesn’t make any sense at all-- Ethan: Well it makes perfect sense to me :) Mark: Of course it does, course it does.. Ethan: * h a c k*  Next. Mark: ..Russia. Ethan:  …. Wghlcum to Russia. *laughter* Capital of s n o w,,, and bad weather. In here we have,, big radiation poison. It makes your big rats bigger, and your sack hang lower,,, and you-- *laughter* you can’t go anywhere near tha snow.  If tha snow touches you,, you go “ohh FACK-” and then yu ded. You can’t even hh- help yourself-  *laughter* noone can touch yu, noone can hug you- what kind of life is that? Not a life worth wiving. Ghgwhhhh-  *L A U G H T E R* Which is why in nineteen eighty siiiiiiixx?? When chernobl went “Imma,,,, gonna ‘splode now,,,”  people said “FACK.”  Did you know,,, that when you think,, I think… when I think about…. CHERNOBL!! 

*uncontrollable laughter* 

Ethan: My mind says, ‘world war two, world war one, north korea! WHO KNOWS Wh-WHEN IT HAPPENED!!! But it was so SOOON- --  when it happened,, if you do the math …  which i cAnT.. *laughing* You’ll realise it was 30….. yeearrsagooooo…  1986 is when it happened…  Quick, quick do the math for me *snaps fingers* how many years ago?? Mark: 33 Ethan: When it happened, when the whole world said, “We’re going to die. We’re going to die. The llll,, the radiation was swpt up by the wind, much like the fires of…. North california-  

*laughter*

Mark: Oh god… oh god-   Ethan: And they were swept- swept- swept- swept- swept- and they went up into the smoky air,, and they… okay,, picture this alright??? One time, you’re going to bed,, and you wake up and you go pee in the night… and you see BOOM BOOM BOOM all over the place… from one… place actually. Mark: *actually suffocating from laughter* Ethan: uh,,, only one explosion. *C O U GH* ighgh- it gets me choked up sometimes- aghibfuh- it went SUPER BIG, and the whole government said,, “don’ worry about it,,, you cant…. The radiator cant ‘splode! It’s impossible!” Well listen here,, PHUCKER. IT IS!! It happened 2… years.. before 35 years ago!!!  33 years ago it happened ! Swept up by the wind,, it,, Sweden said, “Oh, we can feel it,,” and so they said “okay, we have to get it under control” they put so much sand *laughing* o- on top of it- *dissolves into laughter* Mark: your Russian accent has slipped a little bit- Ethan: yu don know anything-- Mark: *bursts out laughing* Ethan: They put some sand on top some dogs died some kids died and they tried to evacuate the WHOLE area but it was too late for them they said “ohhh yu can survive-” but now people go back,,, to BULLETS,,  *pause* Sooo,, it’s still bad there. *Mark bursts out laughing* Mark: good god, man, I’m just lookin for an accent.     You good? You good man? You good? Ethan: Wrap it up. Also Ethan: Next one. Mark: what?? Ethan: Ye, sure. Mark: Ughh, alright,, give me some Italy. Ethan: *scrunches his face up, preparing his accent,*  Alexa? Play when the moon hits your eye its a big piece of pie,, song,, Alexa: Here’s Spotify (starts playing That’s Amore) Ethan: *mumbling* fucking.. asshole… Alexa stop. Alexa: *continues playing* Ethan: *mumbling along with song* shit… *puts on baby hands, hits camera* ringalingaling, bitches fkn shit…     PAUSE!! PAUSE!! ALEXA!! PAUSEIT!! YOU STAY! You stay here ! shh! *blows kiss, gets up from table* you stay here! You don’t move a muscle! Stay! Stay. *walks away from camera, up the stairs* Mark: *to Spencer* Spenceyyy,,, you wouldn’t happen to know what happening here, would you?? Spencer: Mark: Spencer… your master has gone crazy! You need to run. Run away spencecr.. It’s not safe for you here… what the hell?? Alexa: *starts playing Lose Yourself as Ethan runs down the stairs with baby hands on* Ethan: *basically fucking turns into Eminem*  through this hole that is gaping…… *bursts out laughing* as we move farther, new world order.. *flailing arms around, knocks gum off counter* *further struggling*   Can,, can this be done?? 

Mark: *laughing in complete confusion*   Goodbye,, remember that we only have a year. Ethan: H-- *contorts face* how much time do we have left???  Ghhghg Mark: ah,, fuckin,,,  

 *timer*

[fortunamuta]

Pt.3 Devilman Crybaby Post (anime spoilers)

Alright so this is the last post and honestly i forgot to talk about the last episodes 7-10. Can u feel my depression while writing this, bro the sadness is never ending. I have become one with the mf void, and within it there is no self, no thoughts, no emotions just darkness.

Also TW alot of this stuff is extremely gory and dark (lots of horrible deaths that I may talk about, so tread lightly)

Lets just say things took a turn for the......first of all WTAF Homeskillet NOOOOOOOOOOO (if u haven’t read part 1 of this post homeskillet is Taro Makimura) HE ATE HIS FREAKING MOM, AND WHEN I TELL U I GAGGED AND FELT MY EYES TEARING UP. THAT WAS THE MOST TWISTED THING I EVER SAW AND THE DAD FOUND THEM. Basically the mom had taken Taro away from the family when she learned that he was a demon, also i thought he was a devilman but he didn’t win against the demon so he was taken over. But in the scene when he’s slowly eating his mother, and his dad is screaming why pointing a gun at his son, who he now realizes is his son. Taro’s demon begins to tear up making me believe that Taro was conscious but not in control of his actions. And thats when the tears begin to fall, and the dad was screaming and crying at how unfair the world was and how disgusting the sight in front of him was he couldn’t bring himself to shoot. So then the army guys who kill demons came and the dad begged them not to kill his son, but without hesitation they fired on dad and Taro, subsequently killing both. Akira tried to save them but was ultimately too late and ended up atleast grabbing the bodies and burying them.

The next scene in the episode shows Akira crying while on his knees infront of three graves (with crosses) on what looks like a hill. And I wondered if this was alluding to the three crosses who stood on Golgatha’s hill. This definetly marked a turning point for Akira and how he felt about Ryo. Anyway demons from everywhere popped up and tried to kill Akira at the instructions of Psycho Jenny, but then Miko saves him.

OH SCHNAPP I FORGOT TO TELL YALL Miko is a devilman and sis ate MY KING OF SPOKEN WORD and I think she ate her grandmother too. Anyway she really uses her new abilities to her advantage and wants to be better than Miki M. She later confesses that her jealousy and hate was just her inability to come to terms that she loved Miki and looked up to her, she didn’t like being outdone when she was used to being the best. Anyway she saves Akira from the demons trying to kill him. At this same moment Ryo is having a come to jesus moment (more like come to satan moment) he realizes that he is SATAN. I FUCKING KNEW IT. Anyway he goes on air, and stirs chaos by OUTING AKIRA. If i could throw hands and get my grandma to pray the mess outta that fool I would, damn he really didn’t have to do him like that so the whole worlds now knows that humans can become demons, so people begin to openly attack everybody. Anyway that public call out puts a target on Akira. 

Akira and Miki have a moment where shes like even as a devilman he’s still the crybaby she’s always known and love. oh btw Miki now knows her parents are dead and so is her little brother. Let me tell u her screams of anguish THAT SHIT HURTED. Anyway The Spoken Word Squad is now friends with Miki because the main dude gotta crush on her, and THEY ARE SO MF LOYAL THE REAL MVP’S of THE SHOW. (except shorty he really played us) Anyway Akira goes to get answers and confront Ryo and u can see the betrayal on his face he truly still believed Ryo was trying to make the world a better place. Anyway a mob descends on the Makimura household and the Spoken Word Squad says to leave it to them. At this point I am bawling my eyes out, and i’m slowly being pulled apart by the void. Miko takes Miki on her back to try and escape from the mob but those hoes mad angry and for what reason, anyway before this Miki made a twitter post talking about how much she loved Akira i think in the familial since tho, and how even though he is a devilman he is still who he used to be and that the humans are capable of loving them even though they are different. He’s not the enemy they should be focusing on. 

So as u may have guesses SPOKEN WORD SQUAD DIED, eversingle one of them, but not without being the baddest bitches every before going out. Seriously Homeslice with the dread had that crowbar and my boi was swinging and taking hoes out, but homie ended up getting over powered and visciously stabbed to death. The same happen to the dude who was crushing on Miki M basically there were just too many people(those people were the real monsters, giving into raw fear to tear into children like that) 

Anyway Miko and Miki are making there escape and they end up on their old running path, and its really sad. A jeep comes out of nowhere and everybody a motherfucking automated weapons. And they continue shooting at Miko and Miki until they bring them down, Miko urges Miki to run and continue running until she’s safe and to leave her behind. Miki runs and then the show the screen with them as kids running and passing the baton. Miko passes Miki the baton signaling her death, then Miki continues to run with the baton she’s trying to catch up to Akira who in front of her but she can’t seem to and then someone in real life shoots her in the legs, but she keeps moving and finally she’s able to pass the baton to Akira. At this moment (not me tearing up as I write this) she is tackled by some guy who stabs her and she screams out, calling out for Akira. But he never makes it.

Akira goes to this place where humans have crucified other humans and there are throwing stuff at them. Akira comes and shields them, and cries out that if they should kill someone kill him. In the midst of his crying, a voice over of miki’s letter is played. And like in the bible a little child shall lead them, which a little boy goes up to Akira to hug his leg and other kids follow the mob stops throwing stuff and now some adults are coming up to Akira to apologize hugging him and crying and they help the people they had crucified. In the midst of this the demons convince Track Homie to betray Akira even though Akira was helping him. So he impales Akira with his horn thing, in the process trampling many of the humans who had been standing near, causing a panic. Demons come out of nowhere and Akira gets away.

Now Akira has made it back to Miki’s house after a big fight with Ryo promising to defeat the other. He gets there to find the house up in flames and a mob surrounding it all whooping and cheering. He focuses on the mob and almost throws up finding that Miki, Miko and the Spoken Word Squad had all been decapitated and amputated and their limbs where pushed down on spikes which were being lifted and waved around for all to see by the mob. In a fit of rage and sadness at the fact that humans had done this he releases a fiery blaze crisping the humans in the mob. He swiftly leaves and the final strand attaching him to Ryo breaks. In Ryo’s tranformation to satan they now are naked, full breast and genetalia on display with big white wings. Ryo tells Akira that he doesn’t want to fight him, he did all of this so they could be together. But Akira said he has enough spite and anger for both of then and charges, they have a midair battle and the demons back up Ryo, in the end other Devilman come to help Akira lending him limbs so that he may continue fighting sacrificing themselves. 

The fight is long and sad, you can tell immediately that Akira is no match for Ryo. The scene changes to when they were younger as children, playing in the snow and going to hotsprings, exploring and just enjoying each others company. It shows just how pure and adorable Akira was and how Ryo always showed sign of not having any regards for life and believing that the weak deserved to die. Then it changes scenes to the baton passing scene showing the baton being passed from miko to miki then to akira and finally akira trying to pass the baton to Ryo but the baton keeps dropping between then, it happens several time until it drops one last time and the new scene is of the sky. Ryo’s voice is speaking to Akira as he stares at the sky, we see the side profile of Akira and his eyes are open but he’s not responding. 

Ryo continues to speak about them as children, then the screen pans to the sky showing broken planets and the earth around them is destroyed all that remains are broken pieces and the heel they are on. No other signs of life. Ryo asks Akira a question, and believes him to just still be mad at him but then he touches his face and says he’s been so quiet. Finally he cries and he exclaims how he doesn’t understand these feeling and asks Akira what these feelings are. 

Akira finally hands Ryo the baton.

The scene pans to show us Akira missing half of his body and dead. Ryo cries out to Akira pleading with him to say something, then he pleads that Akira not leave him alone. He continues to sob into Akira and plead to not be left alone as the screen moves further away from them, showing the actual destruction caused by their fight which basically destroyed the solar system. 

So yeah, i am one with the void, devoid of emotions, thoughts, and feelings. I belong to the darkness, how tf am i supposed to feel after that. I-i just wanted Akira to be happy, but apparently that was too much to ask. Goddamn THE WHOLE MF SOLAR SYSTEM. I cried so hard my brother was actually worried about me, I had puffy red eyes and couldn’t stop my mf hiccups. and warning i do no cute cry, that shit was really ugly. 

So yeah, I thought it was really good, definitely not for everybody though. Imma need to watch some Ouran Highschool Host Club. Also prayed with my grandma the other day for extra protection. But umm somebody please tell me what the relationship between Akira and Ryo because the end scene got me confused. I think it Ryo realizing his feeling for Akira because he didn’t want him to die and realized Akira had always been there for him. So this was def a wild ride, Miki was honeslty a pretty solid person except when she was modeling for that creepy dude. And then sis went to his house and asked for a shower, I was like sis are u DumbDDumbDDDDumb, luckily Akira was there because Ryo out here killing grandmas and was ready to kill Miki back then too. 

Also FLY HIGH SPOKEN WORD SQUAD and MY KING OF SPOKEN WORD.

and Taro really was bestboi led astray.

My pain level is astronomical might as well be numb. 10/10 probably won’t watch again unless I need a good cry and psychological trauma. But it was really good all in all.

[dayasbun]

Fame - Angus Cloud (2)

Summary- a luckily timed audition leads to you falling for your new and unexpected co-star.

Warnings- okay HI welcome to my first multi chapter series woah?! this is actually so exciting for me like wow especially since angus doesn't have any fics yet im just really really excited- so warnings! smut for sure, bad words, lotsa fluff, angst- everything in one basically. here comes a ride and I hope you enjoy :)

Part 1

Part 2 {reading now}

-

You didn't do happy dances often, because usually there weren't many things that made you happy enough to dance for. But when you woke up after having the most splendid dream to an email that read:

'Hello Ms. Y/F/N Y/L/N, and thank you for applying for the role as Jess. We have reviewed your audition tape and were quite pleased with what we saw. For the next step in the hiring process, we ask that you come to the same site yet again today at 3 PM for a go through with your possible costar, without the script. If that time isn't good for you, please return this email in its entirety so that we can reschedule, and if the time sounds good we can't wait to see you today. Thank you.'

...a happy dance seemed to be necessary, right?

Your excitement bubbled as you put on a light pink crop and a pair of simple blue jean shorts. The look was overall simple- too simple for you, so you decided to top it off with a few hair-clips, a coat of lip gloss on your lips, and lastly some sweet-smelling lotion on your bare arms and legs.

It seemed as though 3 came quickly, but you made sure you were there by 2:50. 'Better to be early than late', you always told yourself. You always stuck by that.

Walking into the building with your pink jelly wedges clicking against the marble floor you signed in. To your surprise, they called you in at 2:55, earlier than you were expecting.

"Y/N! Punctual and looking gorgeous as usual," said one of the co-producers, Mary, and to your surprise she greeted you with a hug. She was the woman that showed the most hospitality to you through out the time you had been auditioning, a sweet, short little woman that smelled like this mornings coffee.

"Aw thank you, you're so sweet," you smiled letting off of the hug and readjusting the crop.

"So Angus is running a bit late, it happens a lot so feel free to sit over there with the other girls and we'll just see where this takes you guys sound good?"

You wondered how he was running late when it was only 2:57, but you just agreed with a smile and walked over to sit with a small group of girls. All of them glared at you as you sat down, so you decided to weigh out the competition.

You weren't one to judge- or you tried not to be- but god these girls were bland. No hair-clips, no lip gloss- not even a smile. Almost all of them wore the same, a white button up blouse with black slacks, black ballet flats, and kept their hair tied back with a colorful scrunchie. Blonde, with perfectly painted nails and you would bet money they had pedicures to match. There was nothing wrong with them, but they seemed to not know how to have fun from the energy they were giving off, and how boring it must be to have no fun. You honestly almost couldn't help but to feel worried though, was there a dress code in the email that you missed?

More girls began to filter in as the next 10 minutes passed, at least some of them seemed to actually have a personality.

"Okay well imma call you back, I got some business to do- oh you know it you feel me!? Nah wit' the show, like auditioning with all these girls or sum. Yeah okay bet imma call you later anyway, bye."

3:13.

"Angus, you're late." Mary spoke up with a sigh, "I don't want any excuses from you, lets kick this into high gear shall we?"

"Who was giving excuses though like... I just be cancelling my alarm, nobody got time for waking up before 2:45 anyway."

That made you laugh a bit, and apparently louder than you expected, because the whole room, Angus included turned their heads to look at you. Mary shook her head and just looked at the list she held, and you lowered your eyes to look down at the carpeting. "Alright let's start. Girls exit the room, the auditions are one on one with just us, you, and Angus to avoid pressure and judgment."

You all stood up, heading towards the door to pile out.

"Y/N, stay."

Why'd you feel like you were about to get in trouble for laughing or some shit?

You turned around and walked to the center of the room by Angus, but you didn't look up at him. You could feel him watching you and considering you had no idea what he was thinking, you hated it.

"Well you two know what to do, start when you feel comfortable. Y/N has the first line."

You turned your body towards him and looked up, he was a lot taller than you...you felt like a little person.

Before you got too flustered, you let out a shaky breath and started. "But baby, come on you can do so much more, you can- we can travel the world or some corny shit like that, that's what you always wanted to do when we were kids. You don’t have to sell, and we can bring Ash with u-"

"Yeah well we ain't kids no more. Traveling takes money, I put all I got into stuff that's actually useful. I shoulda never gotten attached to you and shit again, damn you always do this."

"Fez..." your voice softened as you remembered this part of the script: 'Jess stood on her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around Fez's neck, pulling him down to her. Fez places his hands on her waist and...'

You did as the script said and he did as well. Feeling his hands on your bare waist you looked into his eyes- they were quite gorgeous- and continued on. "You say you want me but you don't act upon it. How am I supposed to be here if you don't open up to me-"

He let go of you and rolled his eyes, "Girl I got shit to do. So you can leave if you finna do allat."

"For fucks SAKE you're- God you're just frustrating! What do you have to do? Go sell? Go talk to Mouse and risk your goddamn life again because there's a drop of blood on money that you stole?! Its so hard to love you and you don't get that!"

"Its hard to love me? Me? Come on. How hard do you think it is to love a bitch with daddy issues that wants to watch Sailor Moon every night- I hate that shit! But I watch it for you- and you just complain about your dad not loving you and how he never coming back? Well maybe you should realize that shits true and move on from it all you do is-"

Your eyes begin to fill with tears and you immediately turned to walk away but were quickly pulled back into Angus- excuse me, Fez’s chest, your back against him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that shit."

You elbowed him in the chest- softly- causing him to groan and let go "You know you meant it. That's it Fez, I'm done." You walked away slowly ruffling your hair-

"Scene! Holyyyyyy wow that was amazing! The passion- are you guys sure you've never acted together before?"

You turned around jokingly bowing as you wiped your tears from the corners of your eyes. Angus laughed and came over to you shaking your hand. "You're good. I like yo' energy too, I hope to see you around set or sum."

You swallowed thickly, if you got this role you could not be this nervous around him everyday.

"It's not hard when I'm acting with someone so talented." You said softly, letting go of his hand after he shook it. He smiled with a chuckle "Thank you, thank you."

There was a strange tension between you two- why? You didn't know exactly, but you knew it wasn't only on your end. You thanked everyone for their time and they said they'd keep in touch. With one last glance at Angus- who had never stopped looking at you- you gave him a gentle smile and then walked out.

You rushed to the bathroom and into a stall, letting out a breath you didn't even know you had been holding in. You thought everything over, the tension, the feeling of his hands on your waist, the look of approval Mary had on her face when you two finished. You'd surprisingly never felt more confident about a role you'd tried out for, and due to that you couldn't seem to stop smiling.

[trimisu]

BITCH DON'T FUCKING BLAME ME go blame my teachers GOSH. they send me assignments and a test on LITERAL FUCKING FRIDAY'S AFTERNOON GODDAMN. bitch yk what this means right, friday's afternoon supposed to be relaxing time but THERE'RE WORKS??? bitch omg imma literally cry SOBS a i still have one assignment left and i want u to slap me the hardest u could so i can snapped outta my laziness n finally gettin some damn works done, but anw enough w shits hru doing??

gurl i did not just rant did i i'm so sorry ToT

OMG I LITERALLY HATE THAT WHEN TEACHER JUST DROPPED THE BIGGEST AND HORRIBLE ASSIGNMENTS 😭😭 NOT TO MENTION YOU WERE RELAXING AND WORRY FREE 😭😭

I ALSO HATE HOW THEY JUST DROP THOSE BIG ASSIGNMENTS WHILE THERE GAVE SO MANY ASSIGNED WORK LIKE "oh you have 5 assignments that due today/tomorrow? Here have 6 more!" 🤡 they're shitting my d- SOMETIMES THEY'LL DROP A BIG (GROUP) PROJECT AND NOW YOU HAVE TO JUGGLE ON FINISH YOUR HOMEWORK AND THE PROJECT 😭😭

If i slap you, slap me too bitch, because i have so many modules that I need to finish YEKAGEOS i wish im a face2face student

[cookierin-simp]

Throwing back on this lesson because the fact that he was so jealous that Mammon gifted MC the plushie and he don’t want to show it because Diavolo was there.