#HELL EVEN ONE HUG BETWEEN 47 & LUCAS

[internetmisfitsworld]

Ort-Meyer: “This is your gift. Your gift and your curse. Touching lives only by ending them.”

47 & Lucas: how bout no? *proceeds to become girl dads* 

[chidoroki]

In Defense of TPN S2

Okay, so before y’all start throwing your salt shakers at me, let me explain. Yes, I’m just as upset and annoyed with how the second season decided to cut out so much content that us manga readers were finally hoping to see: no Yuugo, Goldy Pond arc or GP Resistance, Lucas or Glory Bell escapees, Adam, poachers, or Cuvitidala Search. Since this season also (sort of) reached the 2047 time skip, we were also denied of the Paradise Hideout, Jin, Hayato, Ayshe, the Seven Walls & Imperial Capital Battle arcs and Alex due to the anime’s so-called “original story” idea. While some manga events still took place (B06-32 getting blown up, the trio’s reunion, Norman’s time at Lambda, the cursed blood and the Grace Field raid), they were all significantly changed and barely held the same emotional impact, as we see very little to no build up to these moments. Several volumes were skipped completely and despite others being touched lightly, we unfortunately missed out on major character development for everyone, most notably for Emma, but also the lighter side of things such as chef Ray, medic Anna, Rossi learning morse code, Minerva!Norman, etc. There’s honestly so much of the main story to talk about and I totally understand why we’re all so ticked off, especially since that darn slideshow did absolutely nothing to calm our hearts at the end of ep11.

However.. I’m not gonna stand by and say this season was worthless. Highly disappointing given everything I just mentioned of course, I get it, so don’t curse me out just yet. People can trash talk it all they want and I’ll sympathize 110%, but I personally won’t do so. I love this series too much and that’s a huge reason as to why I didn’t drop this season. Usually whenever I start a new series, it’s because I become interested in a character or two. I find that no matter what happens in that series, whether the story intrigues me or not, I’ll continue it if only to see more of that character. If the story is good, it’s just another plus for me to stay addicted, so while this season totally missed their chance to adapt the wonderful source material of my favorite series, I stayed to watch Emma, Ray and all the other children I’ve grown to love over the past two years. Another reason why I stayed on this train wreck was because of how thought provoking it became as turned into yet another guessing game for me. After first watching the OP and even more after ep3 aired, I kept wondering what would they include or leave out. How would they handle this scene if this and that were already changed? How would they fix this problem if so and so isn’t here? It felt like I was watching season one blind all over again; seeing all these little clues sprinkled everywhere and yet not having any idea on how the story was going to continue or end got me excited. That’s why I came to love this story in the first place, so having the chance to feel that again alongside characters I love so dearly.. it was fun for me (until the slideshow punched me in the face). While many people will look at this season and declare the manga and first season are both superior (which they are, I agree), I’m still sitting over here like “oh look, more content!”

With all that nonsense out of the way, I thought I would go ahead and ramble about everything I believe the second season did well enough, because if I can take any heat off this adaptation then you’re damn right I’m gonna try. So if you’re wondering why on earth a manga reader even mildly enjoyed this season, it’s honestly just the little things such as a decently adapted or improved panel/scene, any new, interesting elements the anime may have included, or other personal favorite moments of mine.. which there were a lot of.

So no negativity past here kiddos, we’re gonna be as optimistic and lively as an orange antenna.

(mild manga spoiler warning, I guess? but I’m sure it’s nothing y’all haven’t heard us readers mention/complain about already)

- If you’ve read any of my reactions to this season, you would know how much love I have for “Identity.” Not only is the song still an absolute banger, but the opening sequence itself is fantastic. From the contrast between human vs demon, the cameos, the symbolism, the match cuts, the build up to the chorus.. just everything. I could talk about it endlessly and watch it several times over and still be impressed.

- Lani’s stupid fall.

- How clearly it shows Emma’s condition becoming progressively worse.

- Her scream.

- Ray’s apology, especially how soft his voice was when saying “sorry, Emma,” and the smile he gives after she tells him not to worry about it.

- And his entire promise to keep everyone in their family safe. Oh I was so happy to finally hear him say that.

- This exchange between Don and Gilda.

- Rossi and those darn faces he gives us. This boy is such a mood.

- How involved the younger kids were so they don’t feel like they were just.. there, which served as a reminder that everyone from Grace Field is smart, not just Emma and Ray.

- How pretty the demon forest looked at night when all those odd creatures started glowing (even those darn goowee).

- So happy with how this panel was adapted. That smirk of his is everything.

- The fact they remembered a small detail such as the bell.

- Knowing now that they cut so much out of the manga, I’m glad we at least got the hug.

- The ending sequence gave us a small look at Sonja and Mujika’s travels by themselves. “Magic” is also so very calming to listen to.

- How the children hug both Emma and Ray, as manga only had our girl receiving the hugs.

- Sonju & Mujika’s voice actors fit them perfectly.

- How impressed Ray was when he first tried their cooking. No wonder he was so eager to learn how to cook.

- Sonju’s story about the demon world from ch46-47 practically adapted word for word.

- While the manga also shows us how frighted the duo is upon learning they’re living in the worst case scenario, it’s seeing them and their hands physically shake that help push this scene a little bit more (not that you can tell this by a still frame but trust me).

- Their synchronized smirks and how well their excitement was not only animated but how genuine and real it sounds too. Emma’s laugh and the fact they made Ray of all people sound hopeful is fantastic.

- They kept the small Ray from this panel and made him better.

- I just love seeing him be optimistic.

- The entire scene when Emma & Ray are both scolded by the younger kids for acting so recklessly is perfect.

- They kept this tiny comment of Nat’s.

- Finally getting chef Ray and hearing how confident he is with his cooking skills already.

- Seeing other children like Dominic pick up archery and be surprisingly good at it.

- Anime pushed Emma’s quick learning ability further with archery by showing us how easily she could land a bullseye even after hitting something midair.

- How well they animated Emma’s first kill, from following the arrow as she pulls it back to when she releases it as it flies towards the bird’s eye.

- The fact that this scene and the next both used a water droplet to symbolize death just like we saw during season one with Conny and Norman’s shipments are so satisfying.

- The gupna scene and how well it emphasized Emma’s reaction to taking a life and how upset/bothered she was in doing so. The addition of a butterfly helps as well, as it’s another way this series tends to convey the idea of death. (you remember how many the OP had, right? tons.)

- I only just noticed that Ray is seen looking at a similar butterfly in the following scene as well.

- The anime doing this panel justice. Ep2 is probably the episode that follows the manga the closest and did real well in regards to that.

- Ray beating Sonju at chess.

- Chris knowing exactly which way to go without using the compass, which makes sense as he was seen mapping out the surrounding area in the previous episode.

- The kid’s adorable little freak out.-

- Giving us a better idea on how large the reference room of the B06-32 shelter truly is.

- Finally being able to hear our boy Nat play the piano. The fact that his first song is named “Nat King Cool” as a possible reference to Nat King Cole is also great.

- Rossi being an accurate representation of the manga readers while watching this episode.

- Chris being his cute self.

- Seeing Ray’s sleeping face after the manga denied us so many times by hiding it.

- It’s.. close enough. We love our chef.

- I love the idea that Nat plays a couple songs before everyone goes to sleep. That’s so precious.

- SHE!! With her hair down!

- Rossi teasing Don and the fact that just mentioning Gilda is enough to scare him.

- It remembered that Gilda has a tendency to count all the children.

- The level of confidence Isabella has in her kids.

- Ray being oh so close to shooting a human with an arrow.

- This hug.

- Chris leading the group through the underground tunnels, which he also does in manga but we learn earlier in this ep it’s due to all the time he’s played down here.

- Because of his extensive knowledge of the shelter’s layout, Chris also guides everyone to one of the secret entrances to escape after he realizes the intruders are only stationed at the main two.

- Ray’s first demon kill is smooth as hell.

- Curse this scene for being so dark because that damn smile Isabella gives us is amazing.

- Since Andrew was cut, Chris and Dominic survive the aftermath of the shelter’s destruction without any injuries.

- Although we weren’t expecting to see their older 2047 selves this soon, they look good okay?

- The emotion in her voice throughout this entire scene (probably the closest we were ever gonna get to Emma doubting herself in ch109/114 too).

- Please just let me enjoy this moment when Ray noticed her negative thoughts and stepped in to help just as I expected.

- Vylk and that goofy smile of his.

- Watching the duo communicate without words during the chase through the demon town.

- Our girl clearing this jump effortlessly.

- Norman’s squishy cheeks.

- Ray’s slap could’ve been better, I know, but at this point I’m happy they still included it.

- The fact we can see Ray’s face during the reunion hug this time.

- And this hug.

- Remembering the small panel of Ray noticing Emma’s bluff.

- Finally hearing this conversation because both voice actors do a wonderful job with it and thankfully the dialogue is on par with the manga as well. Also that one moment when the shadow falls across Emma’s face like that.

- Gilda comforting Alicia after her nightmare.

- The scene is very dear to me so of course I appreciate every little panel we can get.

- How carefree Ray sounded with his “Nopes.”

- How I only realized just now that this panel was also adapted.

- Okay so who’s brilliant idea was it to have the sun rise towards the end of this conversation as Ray helps Emma regain her confidence? I just wanna personally thank them because it was a genius move and I’ll treasure it forever.

- They kept Barbara’s slip-up.

- Like our demon friends, I think the Lambda crew’s voices fit them rather well, although Zazie’s was totally unexpected, like dude you’re 5, why is your voice so low?

- Another “it could’ve been better but at least they included it” moment.

- Vincent’s smile here cracks me up and I don’t know why.

- Barbara’s anger.

- The short snippet we get of the ch126 conversation when the duo was visiting Chris.

- The table from Barbara’s outrage was never magically fixed like it was in manga, so we get this nice shot of Norman reflected in the broken surface.

- The trio’s conversation about the royals and cursed blood follows manga relatively well.

- Anime did this panel better, I’m sorry. Thank you for showing my girl getting angry.

- This frame of Ray.

- This comment of Norman’s that made me wanna slap him.

- How Norman’s face is constantly in the shadows during this scene, which is something his office at the Paradise hideout probably wouldn’t have given us, so hurray for this location instead.

- How he and Emma bicker over how many days their deal should last.

- When the camera shifts in and out of focus during Barbara’s seizure.

- How this scene hid Norman’s face until they revealed the demon the crew killed.

- It really is the small details that make me happy.

- This smile of Don’s.

- I’ll take all the hugs I can get.

- Emma and Gilda’s little headbutt.

- Why does my boy look so grown up and handsome here? Hello??

- I suppose I have to give credit for Peter’s voice actor too hm?

- Actually making Smee a bit more relevant.

- Since the fight against Legravalima was cut, this shot of Zazie is the closest we’re gonna get to seeing him without his paper bag, but it does improve on that one panel of him at the start of ch153.

- Seeing more of Norman’s time at Lambda as well as the aftermath of the explosion.

- While this scene pales in comparison to its manga counterpart, having the sun set behind him while Norman delivers his famous line was still a decent touch. It’s a nice contrast to the sunrise in ep6 and I enjoy it very much.

- Wild demons managing to somehow successful jump scare me not once, not twice, but three times in a single episode.

- Emma getting back up to protect her family despite her injury. (i mean, it’s no ch93 comeback but oh well)

- Ray getting in another decent shot at a demon.

- This face of his.

- Seeing just how quickly the drug causes the demons to degenerate and all the chaos it causes.

- Actually showing Norman attacking a demon rather than just saying he killed Yverk off panel in ch153.

- Hate me all you want but the anime did this panel better too.

- The ch153 discussion is more or less the same but the fact they added in Norman looking to Ray for help and just having him snap back instead was priceless.

- Sonju’s grin.

- The scene when Norman stops Zazie’s attack may only last like five seconds but it’s wonderfully animated and I find myself replaying it countless times.

- How to make the manga readers and anime-onlys panic with just one sentence:

- Isabella being clever as ever by leaking false info into the radio the escapees have to lure them back to Grace Field.

- I just think Emma looks so mature and pretty here?

- Had Norman actually apologize to the demons.. or was just about to anyways.

- Demon Emma is precious and must be protected.

- The adorable mixup between both Emmas.

- I haven’t a clue on where or how the kids managed to gather all the supplies to create several hot air balloons and explosives.. but they did, somehow, and I’m impressed because I’m assuming that all happened within a day.

- Ma’am, could you be any more smug?

- Simon! And he ends up surviving!

- Having Sonju fight alongside the Lambda crew.

- Which reminds me that this is possible since the Imperial Capital battle didn’t happen (yet, in this timeline), so the three of them never received their injuries from Legravalima either.

- The smoke bombs, only because I remembered how Sonju used them back in ep1 while rescuing Ray so it’s nice to see them being used again.

- Showing Norman actually use a bow and arrow this time. He also hits his target on the first try through a smokescreen.

- Ray having enough strength to knock out two demons with a simple metal pipe. In ch169 he’s seen holding down a grown man so yeah, I can believe this as well.

- Having Jemima, Yvette, Rossi & Mark disguises themselves as shipments in order to rally up the other Grace Field kids. Mark’s face and the noise he makes upon seeing Naila again is also precious.

- Peter actually falling for Vincent’s trap.

- Getting one young child to listen to you is hard enough, but Emma manages to get about 183 of them (yes I counted, give or take the four who also disguised themselves) to follow her orders in no time flat.

- Phil helping with the plan to lead all the children to the elevator.

- It made me nervous upon seeing it but they made the Day & Night ceiling real pretty.

- I knew the reunion was coming and still cried.

- Take all my hell yeahs.

- I could listen to her say this on repeat and be overjoyed every single time.

- She’s beauty, she’s grace, she’ll point at gun in your face.

- Getting to witness someone shoot at Peter since no one did so in the manga? Wonderful. Having that person be Isabella who literally lands a perfect shot not even a full second after he pulls out that disc? Perfection.

- Mujika and Vylk bringing in hundreds of civilian demons as reinforcements.

- James!

- Those real quick shots of the ancestors because I had given up on thinking we would’ve seen them at all since the Seven Walls arc was skipped.

- I’m actually surprised they kept his death in and it’s as harsh as the manga.

- Ray confronting Isabella with the addition of this line.

- This panel being animated along with Emma’s thoughts from ch177 towards Isabella even though that chapter’s major event didn’t happen.

- I certainly can not forget about this hug.

- At least anime!Emma told the boys her plan before reaching the door, or didn’t keep it a total secret? If not then I’ll praise the boys for accepting her crazy idea regardless.

- Boy, do you know how much I love you and your smirks?

- SHE. STAYS. ALIVE!!!

- Vincent and Norman’s little fist bump.

- Different but close enough. Still cute though.

- The amount of emotions this one shot makes me feel is limitless. Catch me crying tears of joy over it for the rest of my life.

- Having Phil not only getting the chance to see a train but to ride one as well.

- This pretty shot of Gilda.

- As well as this beautiful one with Emma and Mujika.

- They gave us older Phil. Not sure how much older but he’s still adorable.

- Lastly, the goddamn soundtrack! Of course we heard a bunch of the songs from season one, but the new ones such as “The Evil-Blooded Girl” and the Arabic version of “Isabella’s Lullaby” are absolutely fantastic. I still have to listen to full soundtrack but from what little bit I heard of such songs such as “Nat King Ballade,” “Crisis,” “Norman’s Lament,” and “The Temple Ruins,” I’m sure every track is an absolute joy. I’m so happy we had Obata back for this season.

And that’s the end of it, I guess? Of course it’s not a perfect list, as the majority of it was just personal favorites of mine but oh well. (this is just as long as ray’s birthday post too, oh lord)

I’m not gonna be one of those manga readers who continuously nag people to go read the original source material, because that’s annoying and I understand that some people just might not be up for it. They might watch a series, take it all in and then move on to the next one. Others might want to find out about every little detail and invest more time into the story. It’s totally fine to enjoy a series your own way and you shouldn’t feel pressured to continue something you’re only mildly interested in or feel bad that you love something others might despise. Just do whatever makes you happy. If you wanna check out the manga and see why us readers love it to pieces, then I promise it’s worth it, especially if you enjoyed the anime or wish to see more of any character.. or the entire story. If the manga ain’t for you, then I hope the anime did something for you. It definitely could have been better though, I can’t argue with that.

Whether you’re anime-only or manga reader, can we all still hope for a remake? This season had more flaws than any amount of praise I could give, but if years down the line we get the FMA: Brotherhood or Hellsing: Ultimate treatment where the next anime adaptation follows the manga perfectly, you know I’ll be all for it. I’m too deep in this TPN hole and I’ll probably never leave.

[ultyutae]

Hi can I request a Lucas x reader where she’s pregnant and about to tell him but find out tat he’s been cheating on her so they broke up then meet again a few years later and find about about his son/daughter?

Lucas x (fem)Reader

Word Count: 1400+

Tags: Pregnant reader, angst(?), comfort(?)

Trigger Warnings: infedelity, light swearing

A/N: sorry this took so long :( I know it’s been a month since you asked this but I’ve just been so busy to write anything good, thank you for your patience though, and once again I’m sorry!

[17:47] Your hands trembled as you sat in the bathroom stall, slowly bringing up the pregnancy test you held upto the light to check it one more time, just to make sure there really was two red lines that appeared. After checking over and over again, your heart started to race as realization overcame you: you were pregnant with Lucas's child. In such a case you should have probably been happy, but instead fear and anxiety washed over you, as you realized you had no idea how Lucas would respond to such a thing, especially considering the two of you weren't even married yet. Letting out a deep sigh, you pulled out your phone and texted Lucas, telling him that you had to tell him something important to tonight. Once you finished sending the message, you headed back to your car, tightly clutching the small bag that contained your pregnancy test in it.

On your drive back, you decided to stop by a cafe and get some coffee, since there was still a good thirty minutes till you got home and you didn’t want to risk falling asleep at the wheel given how tired you were. As you entered the cafe, you scanned the area just to see how packed it was. While you were looking around, your eyes fell upon a familiar looking figure sitting at one of the tables near the back. As you took a few steps closer to get a better look, you let out a gasp as you realized it was Lucas. You decided to brush it off and approach him after you buy your coffee, but your attention was quickly grabbed as you watched a pretty woman sit down in front of him, and started to talk in what seemed to be an intimate manner. Okay, maybe I’m overreacting. She’s probably some friend I don’t know about, you reassured yourself. You didn’t want to get jealous, as you found trust to be important in your relationship. But you could feel your trust start to crumble quickly as you watched the pretty woman trace her fingertips up Lucas’s arm, while Lucas made no motion to stop her, and instead grabbed her other hand and intertwined it with his own. That was it. You could feel rage and frustration bubbling inside you, and before you knew it you were striding over to Lucas.

“Hello Lucas, babe, fancy meeting you here,” you said loudly. Lucas jumped out of his seat and the woman across from his gasped, and let out a small “shit!” upon seeing you. You paid little attention to her, and instead decided to interrogate Lucas. “So, care to introduce me to your friend here? I don’t believe we’ve met yet,” you said still in a loud voice, flashing a smile at the woman. The woman nervously smiled back, but only for a few seconds before she looked away.

“She’s just uh... a friend,” Lucas mumbled, taking a sip from his cup.

“No name? Just ‘friend’? Hello ‘friend’, I’m Lucas’s girlfriend,” you said, snatching the cup from Lucas’s hand. Within one swift motion you took off the lid and poured the entire drink on Lucas’s head.

“What the hell was that for?” Lucas snapped.

“You know damn well what that was for,” you said, glaring daggers as he gave you an annoyed look, also taking napkins to dry himself. “So, are you gonna say something about or will I have to force it out of you?” You asked, crossing your arms. Lucas groaned, and took a deep breath.

“Fine, you caught me. I’ve been hooking up with Yuqi for a while now,” he said, glancing back and forth between you and the woman you assumed to be Yuqi.

“I see. Well, I hope you have a nice life then.”

“What?”

“I’m breaking up with you, dumbass. You think I can forgive cheating?” You said, your voice now starting to tremble as your eyes slowly welled up. Before letting him get another word in, you quickly exited the cafe, not wanting to see his face anymore. You put a hand to your stomach, silently apologizing to your unborn child that they would probably be growing up with only one parent. As you got into your car, instead of putting in the address for your and Lucas’s shared apartment, you input the address for your best friend Doyoung’s place instead. The drive there was in complete silence, you couldn’t bring yourself to even listen to music throughout the whole ride. Upon getting to Doyoung’s house, you finally let go of all your emotions when he opened the door and pulled you into a hug, letting you collapse in his arms.

Time skip: 3 years ahead

Your three year old daughter held onto your hand as the two of you were taking a walk to the local cafe to meet with Doyoung, who had been given some free time and wasn’t busy practicing most of the day as usual. As your daughter happily skipped towards Doyoung, who was waiting at the front of the cafe, you noticed someone exiting the cafe, coming from behind him. Your eyes widened as you let out a gasp, realizing it was Lucas. You haven’t seen him since the day you broke up with him. Lucas looked up to see you staring right at him, and you quickly looked away, trying to avoid anymore eye contact.

“Hey,” he said, walking up to you. Now Doyoung’s and your daughter’s eyes were both on you. You took a deep breath, gathering your courage to speak.

“Hi,” you mumbled, looking down.

“It’s been a while, how ha- ow!” Lucas yelped, rubbing his back. As he turned around to see what jabbed at him, his gaze fell downwards as he stared at the small pebble that was thrown at thin. His eyes trailed towards where the pebble came from, leading him to fix his eyes on Doyoung.

“The hell was that for?” Lucas asked.

“Watch your language, there’s a child here,” Doyoung warned.

“To be specific, our child is here,” you said quietly, but loud enough for Lucas to hear you. Lucas gazed down at the little girl standing next to Doyoung, then back at you.

“This is your guys’ daughter? Con-“

“No, she’s yours and mine,” you blurted, cutting him off. Lucas’s eyes widened, as he took another look at the little girl. Her eyes were just as big and wide as his, he realized. The more he looked at her, it was like a wave of nostalgia had come crashing down on him. There was no doubt, this was his daughter.

“But... how? I never got you pregnant!” Lucas asked.

“You remember the day I left? It was the same day I found out. I was on my way to tell you, but then...”

“...then you caught me with someone else,” he finished, letting out a sigh. “I’m really sorry. I was so dumb and immature back then, I didn’t really think twice about anything I would do.” You simply shook your head and let out an exasperated laugh.

“You know apologizing after years won’t do much, will it? What’s happened has happened, all we can do is move on,” you said quietly. Lucas nodded, and slowly made his way over to your daughter. He bent down, so he was at eye level with the small child.

“Hi there, I’m Lucas. What’s your name?” He asked softly. Your daughter looked back and forth between you and Doyoung, not answering before she got a reassuring nod from you. Your daughter shyly introduced herself, and Lucas reached out his hand for her to shake. Your daughter took his hand immediately and shook it, and that’s when Lucas started to sniffle. He quickly got up and turned around, only letting you see his already teary eyes.

“Well, it was nice running into you guys,” Lucas said, clearing his throat. As he started to walk in the opposite direction, you found yourself calling his name.

“Lucas!” he turned around, as if startled at hearing you speak. “You’re welcome to come by and visit us at anytime. Don’t think I’ve forgiven you for cheating on me, but it’s not right... you should be able to see her grow up too,” you sighed, not sure if you were doing the right thing. Lucas simply smiled and you could tell he was going to take you up on your offer.

“Thanks, but I’ll keep my distance. After all, she won’t ever find out who I really am.”

[vexedtonightmares]

last dance (elu ballet au) chapter quatre

Lucas is in his final year at the Paris Opera Ballet School and he’ll be damned if he lets his former friend-turned-rival Eliott steal the lead role in their production of Swan Lake.

aka- lucas and eliott are rivals who are forced to room together for their final year of ballet school before they try to enter the company. we can all see where this is going.  

i. ii. iii. iv.

ao3

Vendredi 8:00

When Lucas was anxious, he stretched. As he sat in the hallway waiting his turn for his solo audition he alternated between a right, center, and left side split as if doing so would calm his nerves. Manon would hold his leg in an oversplit every now and then, sometimes forgetting she was even doing it when she went into one of her pre-performance dazes.

Lucas was the type of person to mark everything out with his hands before combinations or performances, but Manon marked in her head, face going completely blank as she entered her own mind and didn’t come out until she had her routine perfected. While Manon was enraptured in one such daze, Imane sat down directly in front of Lucas as he stretched, looking at him pointedly.

He took out one of his earbuds and raised his eyebrows at her. “Yes?”

“I just wanted to wish you luck,” she said casually. He raised his eyebrows further. Imane wasn’t usually one to wish him luck or compliment him. They’d stood beside one another at the barre since the first day but they hadn’t really talked much outside of class, at least no more than they normally did.

“You… wanted to wish me luck?” he clarified, shifting from a split to butterfly position, rolling out his feet as he spoke.

She rolled her eyes. “Yes.”

“Ok…”

She rolled her eyes again. “You could say thank you.”

“Thank you, Imane. Can I ask why you’re suddenly concerned with wishing me luck?” He propped his elbows on his ankles and leaned forward to put his chin in his hands.

“Because.” She glanced to the side, lowering her voice. “I’m rooting for you.”

He was surprised by her explanation. “Really? I thought you and Sofiane were friends, and isn’t Eliott friends with your brother?”

She shrugged. “Sofiane doesn’t want the Prince. He wants Von Rothbart. And Eliott… well, Eliott’s my friend too, but he doesn’t need my luck.”

“Thanks a lot.”

“I’m not saying he’s better than you, I think you have a real chance at the role Lucas. Seriously. I just know think Eliott likes to tackle these things on his own, so he doesn’t need me wishing him luck. Part of what makes him so good is that he does this because he genuinely loves it, not because he wants a role, or a company spot, or whatever,” she explained. “You’re the same.”

Lucas agreed to disagree in his mind. If Eliott danced simply because he’d loved it, he would still be the same Eliott Lucas had been friends with as a child. Unfortunately, that Eliott was either long gone or buried too far to ever come back out again. Lucas was somewhere in the middle. A part of him didn’t care if he was ever a principal dancer, so long as he got the opportunity to dance for as long as humanly possible, but the other, slightly louder part warned him that it would all be for nothing if he didn’t get this role, the company invitation, the successful career most dreamed of but never achieved.

“Plus,” she added, “You have a real chance, unlike us girls.”

He furrowed his brows. “What are you talking about?”

Imane lowered her voice, but Manon was still in a daze, headphones in her ears. “Please, we both know Odette is Manon’s role and they’re probably just going to go ahead and cast her as Odile as well.” She grimaced, but looked resigned to the fact. He understood how she felt, it was how he’d always felt about Eliott. He wanted to argue with her, tell her that he thought she had a fighting chance as well, but it would have sounded hollow. They both knew it wasn’t true.

“Well, good luck regardless. Maybe you’ll be the Queen Mother,” he suggested.

She gave him a half smile. “Maybe. I’ll just settle for not being cut.”

“Psshh, come on, that doesn’t sound like the badass competitive Imane I know. You’re going to get a role, and it’ll be better than Odette, but don’t tell Manon I said that,” he said, grinning at her.

She laughed and held out a hand. “I won’t tell if you don’t tell anyone I wished you luck. My reputation would be ruined.”       

He clasped her hand and shook it once. “Deal.”

The door to the studio opened and Yann came out, widening his eyes at Lucas and shrugging helplessly. That wasn’t a very promising reaction, but Lucas knew how hard Yann always was on himself, so he expected that the audition had probably gone better than Yann thought it did.

“Lucas Lallemant?” Madame Rigaux called, as if he wasn’t right in front of her. He stood and took a deep breath, looking back down a moment at Imane before starting towards the door.

“Break a leg,” she whispered to him as he went, and he couldn’t help but smile. As the door closed behind him and he stood in front of all of his instructors waiting to be judged, he was filled with a surge of confidence. He could do this.

He smiled again to himself as the music came on, and he let himself remember the days he and Eliott spent rehearsing this same piece back when they were seven, eight years old. Granted, they hadn’t known how to do any of the steps at the time, but he was just as passionate about the dance then as he was now. He channeled that passion, feeling every movement, every pause, every breath, forgetting that this was even a competition at all.

Vendredi 21:39

Lucas hadn’t stopped overthinking since he’d finished with auditions earlier that evening. Sure, they’d felt great at the time, but what if he was being overconfident? What if he really wasn’t as good as he thought he was? Why did he have to wait until tomorrow night to find out if he’d achieved one of his dreams or failed miserably?

He sat in a slightly catatonic state on the couch, not even worried if Eliott would show up and try to engage with him in any way. Eliott, oddly enough, hadn’t even returned to the room yet, even though auditions were long over. Lucas decided not to think about it too much, decided to just be grateful.

His phone buzzed at his side and he picked it up to see that he had a message from Yann in a group with him, Yann, and Arthur. He rolled his eyes at the fact that Yann was texting them when he was just down the hall from Lucas and a room away from Arthur.

GROUP CREATED: ballet bros

Yann: Feeling up to talking about auditions yet, anyone?

Lucas: *insert zombie noise here*

Yann: Oh, good, glad to hear it

Lucas: Just come in here if you guys want to talk, Eliott’s god knows where so I’m alone

Yann: Can’t, I’m making noodles

Yann: Also, Arthur is out

Yann: You can come in here?

Lucas: I physically cannot move. I will not be able to move until cast lists are posted.

Lucas: Wait, where’s Arthur?

Yann: Where isn’t Arthur is the better question

Arthur Broussard changed the group name to “ballet hoes”

Arthur: You’d better be able to move before results are up! The party, remember? Night of our lives?

Lucas: He lives!

Yann: Night of our lives might be a stretch, but Arthur's got the right spirit

Lucas: I don’t know guys…

Arthur: Come on, Lulu. You promisedddddd

Yann: ^^^

Lucas: Ughhhhhhh

Arthur: Would it make it better if I told you that there will be a ton of hot guys there?

Lucas: …

Arthur: No? Damn, I thought that’d do it for sure

Arthur: Would for me

Arthur: Fuck, I miss Alexia, the only one I could freely thirst with

Lucas: Easy there, loverboy

Lucas: I’m just not really in a dating mindset, there’s more important things for me to be focusing on like, hmm, I don’t know, ballet?

Arthur: Who said anything about dating?

Lucas: Ugh, Yann where’d you go

Yann: … I regret to inform you I’m with Arthur on this one

Lucas: I hate you both

Yann: Hey! Come on, what’s so bad about a one-time hookup? Might help you get the stick out of your ass

Arthur: Or in your ass

Lucas: A R T H U R

Lucas: I’m blocking both of you

Lucas: I hate you

Arthur: Hate us all you want, you know we’re right

Lucas Lallemant has left the group “ballet hoes”

He did know they were probably right, which was why he left. He didn’t want to deal with anything other than his own melancholy at the present moment. Then again, a ton of hot guys didn’t sound like the worst thing in the world. If anything, it could help distract him.

Arthur Broussard added Lucas Lallemant to the group “ballet hoes”

Arthur: Not so fast Lulu

Lucas: Should have blocked when I had the chance

Yann: You could never block us and you know it

Lucas: So…

Lucas: What time is the party again?

Arthur: WE GOT HIM

Yann: HELL YEAH

Arthur: It’s at 22h but we’ll probably get there a little later

Arthur: Fashionably late is back in style

Yann: And it’s going to take you an extra hour to pick out your outfit

Arthur: Yes, that too

Lucas: Fine, fine. The booze had better be worth it

Arthur: *boys, but yes

Lucas Lallemant has changed the group name to “I hate both of you so much :)”

Arthur Broussard has changed the group name to “Way harsh, Lulu”

Yann Cazas changed has changed the group name to “Yann and Arthur are the best.”

Lucas Lallemant has left the group “Yann and Arthur are the best.”

Samedi 22:47

“What’s up bitches!” Alexia greeted Yann, Arthur, and Lucas at the door, grinning so wide Lucas was sure she was going to pull a muscle. There was already quite a few people there and Lucas felt a bit anxious about arriving at the time they did. He very much liked to be places on time or early and even though this was a party, he couldn’t help but feel his stomach twist at the thought of being so late.

Alexia pulled Lucas into a hug and he hugged her back tightly. He’d missed her presence at the school quite a bit, but she seemed to be thriving away from it, which was good. The ballet lifestyle wasn’t for everyone. Sometimes Lucas wondered what his life would be like if he was a bit more like Alexia, or even Arthur.

He was pulled from his thoughts by Arthur’s hand gripping his arm and pulling him further into the house, aiming for drinks. Lucas pondered a moment about whether the extra calories would be worth it, but decided he could risk it for the night. It wasn’t like he drank often enough for it to cause a problem for him.

Arthur mixed him up something that tasted awful, but that was to be expected. He downed as much of it as he could in one gulp, staying true to his plan to try to get so drunk he’d forget that he was a mess of anxiety over the casting that was due to be released in any minute.

“Easy there, save some for the rest of us.” Arthur patted Lucas’ shoulder and refilled his drink before drifting away into the middle of the crowd. Yann stayed with Lucas, watching from afar.

“It’s strange, huh?” Yann asked, gazing at all the people.

Lucas turned his head up to look at Yann. “What is?”

Yann took a drink and shrugged. “The normalcy of it all. Most of the people here do things like this every weekend.” “Yeah,” Lucas agreed, following Yann’s stare. It was sort of weird to think about, how all of this was so normal for so many people, and such a treat for people like them. Well, maybe treat wasn’t the best word, but he didn’t know a better one. Anomaly, maybe. That’s what he felt like, at least.

“Would you like to indulge in this mirage of the ‘normal teen experience’ with me?” Yann asked, holding out a hand. Lucas laughed and rolled his eyes at the melodrama of it all, but he took Yann’s hand and allowed himself to be led for the second time that night, this time into the center of a room full of people dancing.

He saw Imane, Daphné, Manon, and Emma dancing with Alexia in a little circle of their own making, each of them looking happy to be reunited with one of their best friends. Basile was with Arthur, the latter trying to teach Basile how to do the robot dance and failing miserably.

Imane’s brother Idriss was even there, standing in a corner chatting with Sofiane and Eliott. Wait— Eliott? What was he doing there? Lucas racked his brain to try to remember if Eliott had mentioned that he would be out that night, but Lucas quickly realized he hadn’t seen Eliott all day. He hadn’t come back to their room until nearly one in the morning the night before, going straight to bed without saying a word to Lucas, and then was gone before Lucas woke up that morning. He wasn’t complaining, but it was a bit weird.

It still didn’t answer why Eliott was there, either. Sure, he was friends with Sofiane and Idriss, but as far as Lucas knew he and Alexia hadn’t been very close. Yann noticed Eliott at the same time Lucas did and sighed. “Ignore him, Lucas.”

It’s not that easy, he wanted to say, even though it should have been. Why was it never easy for him to ignore Eliott? Eliott happened to look his way right at that moment, locking eyes with him over the heads of a sea of people. There was a hardness in his eyes that wasn’t usually there, uncharacteristically closed off. Lucas wondered if it had anything to do with their talk a week before. They really hadn’t spoken at all since, Lucas realized. Good.

“Let’s dance,” Lucas decided, setting his empty cup down and trying his best to sway to the beat in a manner that would constitute as normal for anyone who wasn’t training to become a ballet dancer. It was harder than he’d anticipated, and Yann was on the verge of laughing at him. “Fuck off, like you can do any better,” he spat bitterly, watching the way Yann’s eyebrows raised in amusement.

As it turned out, Yann could do better than him, which was utterly infuriating. Now he didn’t just have to worry about his actual dancing, he had to worry about stereotypical party dancing as well?

Someone bumped his shoulder, and Lucas turned sluggishly. Maybe the alcohol was finally starting to get to him. Wow. The guy that had bumped his shoulder was kind of hot, and, judging by the way he was looking at Lucas, the bump hadn’t been an accident.

“Sorry,” the boy said anyway, but he didn’t look it. “I don’t think I��ve seen you before. I’m Jackson, you?”

“Lucas,” Lucas replied.

“Lucas.” The boy mulled over the name a minute before smiling. “It suits you. Would you like to dance, Lucas?”

Not the way you want to, Lucas thought to himself. There were worse things in the world than dancing with a pretty boy, of course, but then again, Jackson wasn’t even that pretty. Not like Eliott or something.

What the fuck Lucas? He couldn’t just go around thinking about Eliott being attractive, pretty. Where the hell had that even come from?

Sure, Eliott was objectively attractive, he would be an idiot not to notice, but Lucas hated him so much that normally this was just another thing to hate. Countless girls would end up falling for his wild hair and pretty eyes, unaware that their attraction had led them into the nest of a snake.

Jackson was still looking at him hopefully, eyes green and bright. “You know what? Sure,” Lucas found himself responding, taking an outstretched hand for the third time that night and allowing himself to be swept away.

They were playing a song he actually knew now, and it was easier for him to dance more ‘normally’, whatever the hell that meant. Yann caught his eye and winked, which made Lucas blush. Jackson noticed Lucas blushing and blushed back, giving Lucas a small twirl. Maybe Arthur had been right, maybe he could pretend to fall in love for a night and let things happen as they so often did when one was young and stupid and drunk.

Lucas was feeling a bit more bold, so he brought his hands up around Jackson’s neck. There were some perks to being short, after all. Jackson blushed even harder at this, leaning closer very hesitantly.

“I think you’re very beautiful Lucas,” Jackson said quietly. Lucas couldn’t find words to respond so he just smiled. Something about it felt real, something about it felt fake. It wasn’t every day a boy called him beautiful, but the flutter in his stomach that should have accompanied an admission like this wasn’t there.

Jackson leaned closer still. “Can I kiss you?”

Lucas found himself nodding, wanting to feel something for a boy that he should have been feeling everything for.

Their lips met softly at first, Jackson letting Lucas take the lead, pull back if he wanted to. He wanted to, and he didn’t. He wanted to be kissed, he realized, but for some reason Jackson wasn’t giving him the kiss he hadn’t known he was longing for.

It wasn’t a bad kiss, quite the contrary, but it didn’t make Lucas feel like he was flying, like he was alive. Granted, Lucas had never had a kiss like that, but he’d hoped it would happen sooner rather than later.

Another thing he realized while kissing Jackson was that he couldn’t do the one-time hookup thing. Maybe it worked for other people, but he couldn’t just be intimate like that with someone with no sort of follow up. It was all or nothing, something that kind of carried over to his life as a dancer as well.

Having a boyfriend would probably be nice, but Lucas couldn’t stand the ‘talking’ phase, wondering if a person actually likes you or if they’re just being nice or if they just want one thing from you, so he’d settled for nothing at all, not even bothering to try to look. As far as he knew, Arthur was the only boy in his year that wasn’t straight anyway and that was just too weird to think about, so what was the point in trying? Looking elsewhere was impossible, he was too involved in ballet to care about anything outside it.

He was vaguely aware that he and Jackson were still kissing.

They broke apart after an eternity and Lucas was met by a look of utter adoration. Jackson really was beautiful himself, but if being looked at like that couldn’t stir something inside Lucas, this whole thing was fruitless. He blinked and when he opened his eyes again he was staring right at Eliott again, who was staring back.

The expression Eliott wore wasn’t as blank as it had been before, but Lucas still couldn’t figure out what he was thinking. Not that he wanted to.

“I’m going to go to the bathroom,” Lucas said abruptly. Jackson blinked, then smiled.

“Do you want me to come with?” he asked.

Lucas laughed and hoped it didn’t sound as harsh as it felt in his mind. “No, no. I actually really have to piss.”

“I see,” Jackson laughed, releasing Lucas, “See you in a bit?”

Lucas couldn’t force himself to answer, choosing instead to smile before rushing off to the bathroom. Once inside he caught a look at himself in the mirror and was struck dumb by the sight. He didn’t look great, to say the least. The bags around his eyes looked deeper than they had been an hour before, his hair was disheveled from Jackson running his hands through it, and his eyes looked wide and shocked.

He’d barely locked eyes with the mirror longer than a few seconds before he was bent over the toilet bowl, spilling everything he’d drank back out the way it came. He hated vomiting, hated it so much.

There was something about the lack of control he felt with his head in the toilet that made him begin to shake, barely able to breathe between spurts of throwing up, tears starting to stream down his cheeks involuntarily. The shaking wouldn’t stop and he was barely able to grip the toilet seat properly, almost banging his heat on it when his hands slipped. He allowed himself to collapse face down on the floor, curled into a fetal position on the mat in front of the toilet, silently screaming inside his mind.

He felt like he was in one of those dreams where something is chasing you and you open your mouth to scream but nothing comes out or you move your legs to run but stay in place. He blinked quickly and frequently, trying to figure out if his vision was actually spotting or if he was just blinking so much it seemed that way.

He didn’t know how much longer he stayed on the floor like that, lungs screaming for breaths he couldn’t take properly, mind screaming at him for being so stupid as to allow himself to get drunk to the point of vomiting in the first place. Had he even been that drunk? He didn’t think so, he could still stand straight and think straight for the most part.

When he finally felt like he could possibly sit up, seeing more than just blurs of darkness at last, he took a deep breath, grunting into a seated position. He rested his head back against the wall and pulled his knees up to ground himself further. His phone lit up beside him and he saw that it was past midnight, which meant that the casting had to be up by then. He’d been so preoccupied with the façade of normalcy he’d forgotten what he had put on the façade for.

Immediately, he was sober, all remnants of everything that had just happened clearing from his system. Indeed, when he checked his email, there was a message from the director with the cast list. He closed his eyes before clicking on it, praying to any deities that might be listening.

SWAN LAKE CAST LIST

ODETTE - MANON DEMISSY

PRINCE SIEGFRIED - ELIOTT DEMAURY

BARON VON ROTHBART - SOFIANE ALAOUI

ODILE - MANON DEMISSY

BENNO VON SOMMERSTERN- YANN CAZAS

WOLFGANG - JULIAN DAHL

QUEEN MOTHER - DAPHNÉ LECOMTE

CYGNETS - EMMA BORGÈS, INGRID SPIELMAN, CHLOÉ FARGE-JEANSON, IMANE

BAKHELLAL

CORPS DE BALLET* - EMMA BORGÈS, IMANE BAKHELLAL, ARTHUR BROUSSARD, MARIA LANIER, LUCAS LALLEMANT, INGRID SPIELMAN, SARAH BUI, CHLOÉ FARGE-JEANSON, VALERIE THOMAS, JACQUELINE PAGE, LEIA BISSET, CHANTAL MARCHAND   

UNDERSTUDY TO ODETTE/ODILE - IMANE BAKHELLAL

UNDERSTUDY TO PRINCE SIEGFRIED - LUCAS LALLEMANT

UNDERSTUDY TO BARON VON ROTHBART - ARTHUR BROUSSARD

*Some dancers in the corps may be selected for secondary roles to be established during rehearsals; understudies will be expected to practice alongside their counterparts for the majority of the rehearsals, filling spots in the corps only once they have perfected the roles they understudy.

REHEARSAL SCHEDULES WILL BE IN YOUR INBOXES BY 23:59 SUNDAY NIGHT.

Lucas’ phone fell from his hands in a dull clatter. He’d failed. An understudy. An understudy. Eliott’s understudy. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes and he didn’t stop them from falling. He’d earned these tears, would let them flow freely as they wished until he had to return to the party and pretend his dreams hadn’t been crushed once again.

He was unsurprised by Manon’s role, and happy for Yann. Yann was never really singled out either, so this would probably come as a welcome surprise to him. Julian must have been the dancer from the year below them that had made it into the show, so Lucas didn’t totally know what to think about that yet. Arthur was an understudy, just like him, but he didn’t think Arthur would be too upset about it. There was no possibility of Sofiane having to back out from his role, so Arthur would just have more free time on his hands. Imane was in a similar situation to Lucas, but she was also one of the cygnets, performing the famous ‘Little Swans’ pas de quatre, so she’d get an opportunity to shine regardless.

His phone was buzzing continually, filling with messages from Yann, Arthur, and Manon. He didn’t bother to read any of them, knowing they all held condolences and not wanting to deal with it. Turning his phone on silent, then turning it off completely, he slowly made his way to standing, bracing himself up against the counter as he looked directly into the mirror again.

The tears were gone from his face, but there was a hollow look in his eyes that everyone would see right through. He splashed a bit of water on his face and forced a smile, trying to look every bit as nonchalant as he would be expected to look. He could fall apart in the privacy of this bathroom, but he couldn’t be a sore loser out amongst the throngs of people. From their point of view, he was probably lucky to be an understudy. At least he’d get to practice for the role he’d dreamed of, right?

Stumbling back out into the party, the low lighting made it difficult to see at first, which made for a good excuse when he pretended not to see Yann, Arthur, and Basile huddled together in conversation. It was improbable that they were talking about the casting, but it was hard for him to think that they weren’t. Maybe he was just being narcissistic, but it felt like everyone there was looking at him with pity. He had to get out of there.

Jackson caught his eye and smiled, raising one eyebrow suggestively, but Lucas ignored him, brushing past without a word towards the door. He cast one last glance around the room before leaving, gaze landing on a pair of eyes he hadn’t realized he’d been searching to find.

Eliott looked at him not like he’d won, and Lucas had lost, but like he understood exactly what Lucas was feeling in that moment. It was unnerving, but Lucas couldn’t look away. Something passed between the two of them, something that Lucas might have considered further if he hadn’t been completely defeated. Lucas finally broke the stare, looking down at his feet before glancing back up to find that Eliott was still looking at him. It felt like they could communicate without words again like they used to. Are you ok?

No, Lucas wasn’t ok, but he found himself nodding. Eliott gave him a small smile that should have been infuriating, but it was comforting. It was a true testament to how out of it he was that he didn’t feel disgusted by the fact that he’d found comfort in Eliott’s smile. Maybe he would tomorrow, but for tonight, it was exactly what he needed. Thank you.

Lucas barely had time to register the surprise in Eliott’s eyes before he was out the door, wandering aimlessly through the streets until he found his way back to school. If he stopped on the way home to scream and punch a fence, bloodying his hand to the point of tears, he didn’t have the mind to care. If he collapsed onto his bed without setting an alarm to wake up to work out in the morning, he didn’t give a shit. Let lives of perfection be left to those who had earned it.

[spectraling]

My problems with S3

Salty rant in no particular order below the cut

What the HELL happened to the Byers? They went from being the emotional heart of the show to literally having one brief scene together in ep1 and then Will and Joyce had a hug by the end of ep8, which btw Jonathan DIDN’T EVEN JOIN IN ON??? He was literally in the background in that scene, are you trying to tell me my boy Jonathan Byers would not come out to hug his family after all that shit they just went through???? Jonathan and Will spent like what, four episodes standing next to each other and they barely even exchanged a single line?? Not a comforting touch, a hug, anything??

The Byers’ financial situation and how that could’ve given them some interaction, weight to Joyce’s desire to move and also the Byers talking about that AT ALL was lying right there for the taking. Joyce and Jonathan both had obvious concerns about losing their jobs

Joyce got to spend time doing something else than worrying about Will this season which was nice (instead running after manchild Hopper, great), but where are the repercussions of that? With the growing up theme I was hoping for Joyce to start to look into herself, about letting go and who she is when she’s not a mom

Jonathan was once again reduced to being Nancy’s sidekick, spending most of his time following her around and standing next to her while she drove the plot forward with a vengeance. He spent most of his time in the beginning being an abrasive grump and his pov was barely there with the lack of Byers fam content, which made his argument seem as weak as it did in s2. His scenes with Nancy hit the ground running, were rushed and few and far between. As soon as Jonathan was not by Nancy’s side he disappeared entirely from the plot until she called on him again. He didn’t have one single scene without her

Nancy Wheeler would never, ever stoop so low as to mock Jonathan for a) his socioeconomic position and b) his trauma with his dad. A super ooc low blow. Nancy can obviously be ignorant about how economical strife affects others, but actively mocking him??? This is not the Nancy that approached Jonathan “the freak” in s1 and expressed her concerns despite the entire school side-eyeing her. At least Jonathan got to sass back at her later

Where was Nancy’s backstory that was hinted at before the season? Was hoping for her to get some development OUTSIDE of her rallying to save the world 24/7

Will starts out the season having a semblance of an interesting, very relatable arc (abandonment issues, afraid of growing up, done with The Straights) that then goes nowhere in lieu of The Plot and Will just... doesn’t have a lot of beef with the MF. This thing and the other monsters of the UD fucked him for life, let him have something badass to do like I dunno, give him powers you cowards, let him fight the MF you cowards

Also let Will talk to his family about his issues, or have it be a point that Jonathan is now busy with Nancy and how he misses him. Jonathan being somewhat conflicted about spending all this time outside his family and the potential guilt and effect that has on him. Will destroyed Castle Byers that he and Jonathan built together, where the hell were my brotherly feels???

There was a lot of talk about “new pairings” with the characters, but everything felt very same-y. Jopper goes off on their own, jancy does the same thing, El and Mike have a ton of screentime devoted to just them, Steve and Dustin amped up their bromance to eleven, etc. Even when characters that usually aren’t grouped together were in the same scenes, they barely got anything to say or do (Lucas being said to “become closer with Jancy” was a flat out lie or referred to literally physically standing next to them). Where was Nancy and Joyce solidarity, El and Will siblings, Mike and Nancy bonding over their family falling apart, Jonathan and literally anyone but Nancy?

Villain focus completely shifted from the US government to the spoopy, evil Russians with their spoopy language. Stereotypical, tacky and bland af. Being American is Great and in no way problematic! Go patriotism/capitalism!

The abundance of action and cgi. Omg all of the action sequences. It felt like 70% of the season was spent on El throwing shit around with her powers and Hopper fighting Russian dudes. I remember being halfway through the season and thinking they really should’ve slowed down the plot. But that’s an issue with too little time for too many characters. I had no time to bond with any of the characters I liked since the plots were So Big and So Many that they ate up every opportunity for emotional intimacy and reflection. We had time for a goddamn ad for coke but not for the Byers to interact like once???

Also the whole infection/MF working in the shadows thing? Completely wasted potential. It was set up to induce paranoia in the characters and the MF tricking, playing with and torturing them, people not knowing who to trust which could’ve lead to some really compelling scenes. Nope, it’s just a big meaty version of the MF and now it’s running around town trying to fuck El up while nobody conveniently notices and tons of people died but who cares

Robin was shoehorned into the plot and magically had all the skills it took to figure out the code, could decipher Russian with no previous knowledge (the languages she listed as knowing are not at all related to Russian and why tf does she know so many languages??). At least she slapped Stobin in the face and gave us some actual LGBT rep since the doofuses are hellbent on beating around the bush with Will infinitely

Erica was 100% SASS and nothing else. It got old really quick

The entire plotline with Steve/Dustin/Erica/Robin took up about 60% of screentime with memes and sassy jokes and provided about 5% of relevance in the grand scheme of the plot. Everything they found out in the Russian facility could’ve been relayed by the Russian guy Jopper kidnapped

Which btw, why did a random Russian dude take up that much screentime? He had way more emotional development than 80% of the core cast. Also did we need that much Murray?

Speaking of, I did not need Murray doing his creepy, invasive psycho analysis thing on Jopper like he did Jancy last season. It was terrible and lazy writing then and it’s terrible and lazy now

Steve complaining about popularity “not being that great really” made me want to punch him in the face even more than usual. Nobody gives two shits about a rich white boy who got everything he pointed at, all the popularity and more girls than he could count at school while stomping on the outcasts

Also didn’t need that jab at Nancy in his heartfelt scene with Robin (which was funny bc Robin has a lot of similar traits to Nancy)

Karen and Billy was gross, but at least Karen stopped herself to go back to her unfulfilling but legally sound marriage. No need to rock that boat unnecessarily! A completely mediocre man is just fine for her I guess. At least she got a kickass scene with Nancy

Why in the fucking world did Billy get as much screentime as he did. Why on earth did this asshat, racist abuser get some bs sob story about his awful childhood when we have 47 other, way more sympathetic and interesting characters that could’ve been explored instead. And then he did some stupid “grand heroic sacrifice”. I cried more when the Russian dude died

Max was a victim of Billy’s abuse for years which was completely undermined by her ooc constant concern for him and overblown grief at his death

El being oh so concerned about Billy when she knew he was the asshole who had abused his friends Max and Lucas (and beat up Steve) before felt really insincere

Hopper was a huge, loud, violent jerk this season and I’m not having it. I felt sorry for Joyce having to put up with him and then he presumably died heroically (??? he’s obviously still alive guys) and I...didn’t really care? Was kind of on the Jopper train but have no hopes for it now. Where was their supposed “history” together that was hinted at before the season? It just felt like Hopper constantly acting like a huge, controlling manchild and Joyce having to pep/comfort/discipline him. No sense of back and forth support

What the fuck was that music number with Dustin and Suzie?? Omg cringe. I could feel how the characters all died inside

On the subject of music, they stole Jancy’s theme song and gave it to Steve and Robin and then Mileven. Mileven also stole Jancy’s “I love you”, which was clearly hinted from the name of the song on the soundtrack titled “The first I love you”, which is literally a rehash of their theme “The first lie” in s2. A huge slap in the face to end the season with

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 17/04/2021 (Polo G, Dave, Doja Cat & SZA, Taylor Swift)

Okay, so, UK Singles Chart time – all hell broke loose. I knew Taylor Swift and Dave would make an impact but I was also not expecting all of the chaos to come with it. With that said, Lil Nas X is still at #1 for a third week with “MONTERO (Call Me by Your Name)” and let’s just get through with this. This is REVIEWING THE CHARTS.

Rundown

In this starting rundown segment, I’ve got a lot to cover so I’ll make it quick, no nonsense. First of all, I cover the UK Top 75. Why the top 75? I’m difficult – even though it’s actually more convenient. Secondly, the notable drop-outs – songs that peaked in the top 40 or spent more than five weeks on the chart that are gone from the top 75 this week thanks to this avalanche of 14 or so new arrivals. This week, we say goodbye to a bunch of our debuts from last week as well as “telepatía” by Kali Uchis, “Bringing it Back” by Digga D and AJ Tracey, “You’re Mines Still” by Yung Bleu and remixed by Drake, “Midnight Sky” by Miley Cyrus, “Watermelon Sugar” by Harry Styles, “Mr. Brightside” by the Killers and several #1 hits, including “Dreams” by Fleetwood Mac, “Sweet Melody” by Little Mix, “Mood” by 24kGoldn featuring iann dior, “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I and finally, “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi, after spending a whopping 113 weeks in this region... despite being terrible. I mean, it’ll be back next week but celebrate the little victories, like our returns, for example. “X Gon’ Give it to Ya” by the late DMX is back at #72 after the passing of the hip-hop icon last week. This legendary song was actually one of his later hits – not even a hit in the States – and originally peaked at #6 in the UK back in 2003. We sadly don’t see anything else from DMX returning but we do also see Taylor Swift’s re-recorded version of “Love Story” revisiting the charts at #45 off the album boost.

Now for the songs that fell or rose this week, starting with the notable losses, being songs that dropped five spots or more. First, we have “Your Love (9PM)” by ATB, Topic and A7S at #13, followed by “Don’t Play” by Anne-Marie, KSI and Digital Farm Animals at #17, “Hold On” by Justin Bieber at #20, “Save Your Tears” by the Weeknd at #22, “Up” by Cardi B at #23, “Commitment Issues” by Central Cee at #25, “Latest Trends” by AI x JI plummeting at #28, “Patience” by KSI featuring YUNGBLUD and Polo G at #29, “drivers license” by Olivia Rodrigo at #34, “We’re Good” by Dua Lipa at #35, “Anyone” by Justin Bieber at #40, “Black Hole” by Griff at #41, “All You Ever Wanted” by Rag’n’Bone Man at #43, “WITHOUT YOU” by the Kid LAROI at #44, “Binding Lights” by the Weeknd at #46, “Goosebumps” by HVME and Travis Scott at #47, “6 for 6” by Central Cee at #48, “Medicine” by James Arthur at #49, “Head & Heart” by Joel Corry and MNEK at #50, “Met Him Last Night” by Demi Lovato featuring Ariana Grande at #54 off of the debut, “Paradise” by MEDUZA and Dermot Kennedy at #58, Doja Cat’s “Streets” at #60 and “Best Friend” with Saweetie at #61, “Tonight” by Ghost Killer Track featuring D-Block Europe at #62, “Get Out My Head” by Shane Codd at #63, “Beautiful Mistakes” by Maroon 5 featuring Megan Thee Stallion at #66, “Track Star” by Mooski at #67, “Headshot” by Lil Tjay, Fivio Foreign and Polo G at #73, “What Other People Say” by Sam Fischer and Demi Lovato at #74 and finally, whatever’s left of Drake as “What’s Next” is at #68 and “Lemon Pepper Freestyle” with Rick Ross is at #70.

Our gains are arguably more interesting, as it’s impressive to climb five spots or higher or reach the top 40 for the first time in the midst of all this nonsense. Therefore, we do have just a few gains, those being “Runaway” by AURORA at #51 off of the debut, “Nice to Meet Ya” by Wes Nelson featuring Yxng Bane making a surprise attack at the top 40 going to #39 off of the debut, “Good Without” by Mimi Webb at #18 and “Ferrari Horses” by D-Block Europe and RAYE continuing its gains up to #16. That’s pretty much it – still took a while – so let’s get through those 14 new arrivals, huh? God help me.

NEW ARRIVALS

#75 – “Marea (We’ve Lost Dancing)” – Fred again.. and The Blessed Madonna

Produced by Boston Bun and Fred again..

This is one of the songs that really padded out our new arrivals list – to explain, a lot of the time, these songs were released weeks ago and only now gain enough traction to debut within the top 75 and hence be discussed by me. This one just happens to have popped up in a week where everything is going on already so it kind of gets lost in incoherency but regardless, this is a song from Ed Sheeran’s producer Fred Gibson, who I refuse to call by his stage name, from his most recent project featuring vocals from The Blessed Madonna, most commonly known right now as the producer and DJ behind the club mix edition of Dua Lipa’s Future Nostalgia and hence the “Levitating” remix with Missy Elliott and, well, actual Madonna. The song itself is one I’m surprised is about anything but has these mostly spoken word vocals about how we as a world have “lost dancing” to the COVID-19 pandemic, as well as hugs, and, well, that’s all she decides to elaborate about. She also guarantees that once everything is over, “what comes next will be marvellous”. Whilst I appreciate the sentiment, I think it’s almost a dangerous promise, given that we’ll be in this pandemic for longer than anyone expected and it’s pretty evident that we’ll still be keeping to social distancing as the vaccine roll-out continues all throughout this year. At this point, we’re still in lockdown and international travel will still be stunted for years after the fact. This song feels like The Blessed Madonna getting on her pedestal about the arts and their impact on people without going into any detail that warrants the soapbox, bizarrely over some synth-heavy deep house beat that decides to do little more than flutter through the entirety of the five-minute runtime. Yeah, this is pretty insufferable. Next.

#71 – “Slumber Party” – Ashnikko featuring Princess Nokia

Produced by CallMeTheKidd

Okay, so TikTok picks this one up and the label then decides to push this over “Deal with It”, a brilliant pop song that was right there and already had the high-budget video to boot? Regardless, this is taken from Ashnikko’s debut mixtape of sorts, Demidevil, and whilst as a whole the project does little more than act as harmless fun guising as anything more, a couple of the singles are genuinely pretty great, including this one, which seems to be a break-out hit for rapper Princess Nokia. This song relies on the jerkiness of its almost DJ Mustard-esque club beat and that warped might-be-a-flute loop to support Ashnikko’s similarly sloppy delivery, which decides to be as in character in possible – of which I mean that it is obnoxious and frankly ridiculously stupid. This isn’t a “slumber party” at all, and whilst the childish implications are if anything kind of unnerving, there is a lot of fun to be had here if you get past the “kawaii hentai boobies” in the chorus. Nokia’s verse continues the album’s general early 2000s aesthetic with her referencing many hits and singers from that time period in a pretty slick albeit one-and-done verse that should really be extended further than it is. I mean, I would have preferred that to Ashnikko’s second verse comparing her girlfriend to the little girl from The Addams Family, before mentioning how her eyes go black when she orgasms and that her spit tastes like Juicy Fruit gum. Okay, so when it comes to filthy lesbian rap I think I prefer acts like BASSIDE but for what it’s worth, this is surreal and fun enough for me to like. I hope it does well, but know she has better songs even on that same tape.

#69 – “Versus” – SL and M1llionz

Produced by Lucas Dante and Yng Cld

Oh, hey, another drill track by two guys produced by two guys for two guys to rap about how cool it is to be the two guys they are. I guess the gimmick here is that the single actually has an instrumental version as well for whatever reason; I guess they want people to remix the track. That would make sense, as this beat is immediately recognisable from that chipmunk squeak of a glitched vocal sample they use. In fact, I think I prefer the instrumental version because when those booming 808s come in, it hits really hard especially with the scattering drill percussion. SL and M1llionz are trading bars here in what is basically one verse and it’s not like they’re saying nothing of interest here as there is a viable enough amount of detail here in these bars about exactly what you’d expect. But that’s exactly what it is: exactly what you’d expect. By the first verse, you’ve already heard SL talk about watching The Boondocks and that’s about as interesting as it gets. Sure, the interplay between the two guys in this case is pretty smooth, but it goes on for about a minute too long and M1llionz has a lot more charisma than SL so it does feel like half the song is wasted away. The producers know that too, as they decide to fade the song out very quickly after M1llionz stops rapping his final bars. This is fine – on some days, I’d probably call it really good – but it’s nothing I haven’t seen before.

#64 – “Starstruck” – Years & Years

Produced by Mark Ralph and Nathaniel Ledwidge

We’re not even out of that bottom third of the chart and we’ve still got a lot ahead of us before we get above that point. Here, we have “Starstruck”, sadly not the Lady Gaga or 3OH!3 song but instead the first officially solo song by Years & Years, which is now just frontman Olly Alexander after his bandmates’ departure, similar to Panic! at the Disco except the members seem to be on good terms, or Ritt Momney, except no one here is a Mormon missionary... yet. Whilst you could see this from a mile away if you had listened to that last album, it would be deceiving to say it’s only Olly this time around as he’s enlisted several outside producers and writers to craft a pretty straightforward love song. Well, is it any good? I’m not entirely sold on it, mostly because it seems to reject all of the lyrical intrigue there was in those past two albums – at least intermittently – for a pretty generic if not pure and lovely content, with the most interesting of lyrics being about sipping his partner up like cosmic juice, which I’ll admit got a laugh out of me. It is fitting for how this janky dance-pop song sounds as sonically it’s kind of a quirky mess with a lot of bassy grooves in the verses only to be replaced by a shiny synth blend that completely shrouds the chorus in video game sound effects and French house-esque filter effects. This sound is very much a late-2000s early-2010s throwback in some ways and throwing it back even further in others, which creates an interesting sound but not enough to not let this become easily stale after just the second chorus, especially if it’s going to purposefully fumble its climax for an awkward build-up that involves basically revealing the drop measures before it should have. Yeah, I want to like this but it just seems kind of confused as it is. I’m still going to listen to that third album whenever it comes, but I’m somewhat disappointed with this lead single thus far.

#57 – “Lingo” – Deno featuring J.I. the Prince of NY and Chunkz

Produced by Da Beatfreakz

Alright, so British rapper Deno has enlisted New York rapper J.I. – who I refuse to call by his full stage name – and Chunkz, who I’m pretty sure is some YouTuber, to hop on a beat from DaBeatfreakz, specifically this watery R&B beat with vocal loops drowned out by bass and some awkward mixing. Deno isn’t much of a presence in the verse or chorus, J.I. talks about some girl not chewing him right and Chunkz, who sounds awful on any beat with the whiny Auto-Tuned mumble, somehow doesn’t say anything of interest despite being the semi-professional comedian of these three guys, or at least not before Deno takes over his verse and they all give up for the last couple measures. Yes, that was one sentence – this song doesn’t deserve much more.

#56 – “Shy Away” – twenty one pilots

Produced by Tyler Joseph

I’ve never been that big a fan of twenty one pilots, but I was actually pretty fond of her most recent album, Trench. What fascinates me about them is how they seemed to have done really well for themselves that one time in the Blurryface era and have coasted off the success of that to fund some of their more out-there and experimental musical aspirations. I don’t think they’re looking for big hits anymore – which is good because this won’t be one – but people will always be looking out for what they do next, and they’ve just announced a new album coming soon with this as the lead single. Thankfully, it’s not that COVID-19 pandemic pandering from last year which got on my nerves a lot more than it should. “Shy Away”, instead, goes for... 1980s dance-punk, because, of course. I do love that jerky synth lead and how well it’s backed by that chugging bass and percussion, which we’ll always know is organic coming from Josh Dun. The song itself is a somewhat vague motivational track but not for no reason, as these lyrics actually originated from when Tyler Joseph was giving advice to his brother, a budding musician, trying to get him to see himself in a new light and find his unique purpose in music and not to “shy away” from continuing with his dreams. I can get behind that, especially if it’s going to have squealing guitar segues, an infectious power-pop chorus that will probably not leave my head for a long time and the excellent swell of guitars in that third verse before the brief breakdown in the post-chorus with all those squibbling synth effects. It’s just a wonderfully constructed song on all accounts, even if it sacrifices some of that unique personality we usually get from Tyler for the sake of making a tighter pop-rock song.

#52 – “You Belong with Me” (Taylor’s Version) – Taylor Swift

Produced by Taylor Swift and Christopher Rowe

I guess the best place to start with these re-recordings is the original song, which I’ve never liked. I’ve never seen a reason to enjoy Taylor’s entitled adolescent whining over some pretty garbage production making what may as well be organic country instrumentation sound like MIDI tracks. She doesn’t deliver a particularly good vocal performance, or at least one good enough to excuse “She wear short skirts, I wear T-shirts, she’s cheer captain and I’m on the bleachers”. There isn’t enough detail to make this seem like a toxic relationship so she ends up just sounding bratty. This new version, from a matured Taylor Swift a decade later, has decided not to change any of these lyrics and it just sounds worse coming from a Taylor who clearly knows a lot better and is in a happy relationship. Okay, the instrumentation sounds a lot more organic and has more of a groove than it used to, with some more intricate production moments that are cool, but that’s really the only change that improves on an already mediocre song. Taylor’s voice has improved a lot since that original recording but so has she, and her selling these lyrics with as much conviction while in her 30s just ends up sounding sad. It only makes sense to “reclaim” these songs if you’re going to try and make them your own again, and not representative of someone I don’t think Taylor is anymore. Alas, it’s listenable, but this could have been one of the more interesting re-recordings and nothing was done with it past the better mixing and a pretty epic guitar solo, even if it does feel unwarranted by the content.

#42 – “Way Too Long” – Nathan Dawe, Anne-Marie and MoStack

Produced by Scribz Riley, Tré Jean-Marie, Nathan Dawe and GRADES

For someone who is solely a producer and DJ, I say that’s two or three too many credited producers, but regardless, before we get to more Taylor Swift, which we will eventually, we’ve got some leftover house track with B-list stars that starts with the words, “Hey, yo, yo, it’s Stack Rack”. With that said, I actually kind of like this song with its strings swelling more than the usual track and its bass-heavy club groove in the verses being more complex in its percussion, especially when the sound design is that interesting in the second half of the verse as all of these effects and different synth patterns occur in the back of the mix, which kind of lets me forgive how anti-climactic the drop is. It’s not really an EDM song as much as it’s a light-hearted pop track and Anne-Marie isn’t taking it as seriously as she could, especially on that vocoder-drop chorus, which makes the song a lot more fun that it should be. MoStack is who really shines on this track though, as his verse is – probably unintentionally – very funny, as he twists the meaning of the song to a phallic joke, happily engages in monogamy, particularly with every British pop-star he can think of and says “forget quality, I want quantity”. He just lists famous singers by the end of this verse that he finds attractive and is completely gone off the deep-end by the time he’s ignored by Anne-Marie’s swell of a chorus. It’s not a great song and definitely falls into the traps that most EDM does but as it is, it’s a fun track with a surprisingly hilarious and sloppy guest verse from MoStack that I was not expecting, as well as just being inoffensive across the board.

#33 – “Mercury” – Dave featuring Kamal.

Produced by Manny Manhattan and Kyle Evans

Dave released a double A-side single – or at least whatever the equivalent for that is in the streaming age – and this was the less popular track, “Mercury”, with singer Kamal. If you don’t know Dave is, he’s one of the biggest and most celebrated rappers in the UK and this is his first solo release since 2019. I’ve usually been pretty happy with Dave’s releases – hell, Psychodrama was one of my favourite albums of 2019 – but I’m not entirely sure I can endorse this lazy trap beat relying on some gentle but overbearing pianos and groovier bass knocks. Really, the beat is pretty minimal so we can focus on what Dave’s saying, right? Well, we could, but why would we want to? Sure, there’s some good wordplay weaved into here and I don’t dislike his stories about gang violence and paranoia, even if they’re delivered in the most checked-out almost condescending way possible, but I can’t get behind the misogyny that seems to run a lot deeper than it does in typical rap. Sure, he makes the same googly-eyed observations about attractive women, describes some parts of the sex but interestingly not any part he plays, and also describes her as a “work of art”, but this is all after he dismisses women in general for not “forgiving him for his sins”, in some thinly-veiled Ariana Grande reference that leaves me more pissed off than he is, especially since Dave’s not as self-aware as he thinks he is, particularly because he himself can barely forgive himself for his wrongs in that second verse. Instead, he shrouds it in hedonism like any other rapper – what have the women got to do other than make good decisions for themselves about who they sleep with? He doesn’t go into disgusting detail like Digga D on “Toxic” but it rubs me the wrong way, especially if he’s going to then complain about the myth that is cancel culture. If this comes from a genuine place where he was genuinely attacked for something he didn’t deserve the abuse for, I’d understand, but why even complain about the supposed mob of Twitter users when the only tie you have to it is something reported on your brother by the right-wing press that everyone ignored? Other than missing the point terribly, it’s not like this song is catchy or notable. Even he acknowledges that this five-minute bore wouldn’t make the album, and it’s for good reason.

#32 – “Anywhere Away from Here” – Rag’n’Bone Man and P!nk

Produced by Rag’n’Bone Man, Mike Elizondo and Ben Jackson-Cook

So this is Rag’n’Bone Man’s second single from that upcoming album, or at least the second to chart, and after the surprisingly great post-punk rocker that was “All You Ever Wanted”, I’m excited to hear what a duet with P!nk could sound like. After all, they’re both rougher voices in the pop sphere, even if P!nk’s been doing it for much longer. Sadly, it’s a ballad... not to say they can’t do ballads well but this is a pretty minimal piano-lead track with some really badly mixed vocals from Rag’n’Bone Man as he channels an unintelligible Dave Grohl that’s way too loud in the mix, especially when the strings come in and cloud the mix. I do like the content once again with Rag’n’Bone Man as he continues to discuss the careless days of his youth, but this is more about growing older and eventually growing discontent with that lifestyle and each other, just wanting to be somewhere else. P!nk delivers this in a way that’s a lot more flattering to her voice and the instrumental, but when the borderline choir vocals come in with those terribly-mixed harmonies between the two and that pointless bridge, I give up on this song. It just refuses to go anywhere, I’m sorry, and it had a lot of potential but these voices don’t particularly mesh together especially over some basic piano and strings. This could have been great and as is, is less than mediocre.

#30 – “Mr. Perfectly Fine” (Taylor’s Version) (From the Vault) – Taylor Swift

Produced by Taylor Swift and Jack Antonoff

I didn’t listen to the re-recorded version of Fearless; instead I just listened to the six or so bonus “from the vault” tracks because that’s the only new content and I’m not big on any of it. It sounds exactly as you’d expect a 31-year-old woman reciting lyrics she wrote and shelved when she was a teenager, not even thinking they were good enough to release then, decades after the fact, and most of the songs just aren’t interesting at all. I think “Bye Bye Baby” is a great pop song but besides that there’s nothing much to enjoy in these tracks, at least from me. I know that Taylor’s biggest fans will love how she re-recorded leaked and rumoured songs that had been circulating but as someone detached from that, it does nothing for me. This song in particular is about Joe Jonas, because, of course, it was, and it’s a petty, sarcastic break-up song Taylor should be able to deliver confidently but ends up falling flat based on almost that awful verse melody alone, which is just janky, unpleasant and stretched out to the point of annoyance, especially if it’s going to be produced this well. She dug up this track seemingly only to get Antonoff on the record, and, sure, the chorus is catchy and has that one great moment with those crashing guitars, but it enjoys killing its momentum as soon as it gets going... for five minutes. Yeah, I’m sorry but I’m not interested in what was left on the cutting room floor a decade separated from the release of this re-recording, especially if this fully-fleshed instrumentation does little more than distract from how dreadfully boring this song is. Wake me up when she re-records Speak Now or especially reputation, because that will truly be fascinating.

#10 – “Kiss Me More” – Doja Cat featuring SZA

Produced by tizhimself, Carter Lang, Rogét Chahayed and Yeti Beats

I’ve forgotten to mention that three of those 14 new arrivals actually debuted in the top 10 this week, meaning, yes, whilst we’re nearly done, we’ve still got a lot to cover and we start with what seems to be the lead single from Doja Cat’s upcoming album, as she enlists SZA to assist her on this classily unclassy disco-pop song. Those main guitars do sound great, especially with Doja’s signature cooing over them, and that’s before we get to that slick pink disco groove not dissimilar to “Say So” but with a tighter, fun bassline and how quickly Doja strips off the subtlety. I could do without that mess of a post-chorus that is just a blend of too many, not very great vocal takes, but I do love how it leads into Doja’s unsubtle sex bars that actually go into some interesting detail, but not as much SZA being kind of filthy but also delivering a pretty great vocal performance, even if she starts with asking her partner for that “gushy stuff”. I do find it odd that it decides to censor “dick” of all words, but this production is great and I actually particularly like that final chorus and post-chorus once SZA starts harmonising on it. As is, it’s a pretty tight and likeable disco jam from two charismatic performers... co-written by Dr. Luke. Goddamn it, Doja, I don’t know what contract he’s got you in but Jesus, someone do something about that.

#9 – “Titanium” – Dave

Produced by Kyle Evans and P2J

This is our second Dave song and obviously the more successful of the two, at about three minutes shorter – thankfully – debuting in the top 10. It’s much better than “Mercury”, even if the song literally starts with him bragging about not needing vibrators to make his girlfriend orgasm. That said, the lyrics here are actually a lot slicker, flowing much like he did on “Streatham” as he lists so many precious metals you’d think he’s Bender. I do like the intricacies in these lyrics, even if he doesn’t really adapt it into any wordplay. He mentions how awkward that it is that his neighbours are going to vote Conservative as he brags in an almost freestyle-like structure in the single verse he spits, which has a couple flow switches and a lot more empty space than it should for a beat this awkwardly mixed, as whilst I like the trap percussion here, it really does not sound that great over borderline MIDI pianos. The little string inflections and drum fills here are cool though, and those intricacies are what makes Dave’s verse so interesting, as he foreshadows his bar about Tyson Fury with an ad-lib that Fury used himself as a build-up for his boxing matches. His JAY-Z references are also on point and pretty clever, it’s just that there’s still not much to this past that and I’m left pretty underwhelmed with these releases from Dave, even if they’re not from that next album, whenever that’s coming.

#3 – “RAPSTAR” – Polo G

Produced by Einer Bankz and Synco

Well, Lil Tjay debuted at #2 a couple weeks ago so I guess it’s only fair for his fellow “Pop Out” rapper, and the one I personally immensely prefer, Polo G to have his surprise, kind-of-out-of-nowhere top 5 debut. Much like “MONTERO”, this track was being teased for nearly a year, having first been shown as an acoustic collaboration with professional ukulele player – yes, seriously – Einer Bankz, who’s also credited with production here, in May of 2020. Just shy of a year afterwards, we get “RAPSTAR”, in the same vein of other all-caps trap songs about musical success like “ROCKSTAR” or “POPSTAR”. Maybe next we’ll get “NEOCLASSICAL DARK WAVESTAR”. Regardless, this song is basically just about being epic and Polo G can effectively sell that even in his more basic flexing because of that intermittent detail like when he says the only woman he talks to is Siri, which isn’t even a brag or a flex, more a sad admission of his crippling loneliness which I don’t think was intended. He also does more than empty flexing, discussing his past drug addictions and how he coped with that alongside all of the struggles he had to overcome at the same time. That second verse may start with him saying he’s 2Pac reborn but it goes a lot deeper into his anxieties than I expected. All of this is over a melancholy guitar-based beat with some great bass and better mixing than is expected of these pop-trap singles, even if it’s still far from perfect. Those eerie vocal loops in the background add a lot to this song and I think that chorus has a pretty great build-up, even if the percussion may seem a bit too basic and uncomplicated as an effective drop. I can’t really complain about this at all, though, as it is really good for what it is and I’m glad it’s this high.

Conclusion

And with that, I’m finally, FINALLY finished with scouring through these new arrivals and I’ll admit that it was less of a mixed bag and more of a generally positive week, at least for me, as I found more I liked than anything I disliked, particularly with Best of the Week as that goes to twenty one pilots for “Shy Away”, with the Honourable Mention going to Ashnikko’s “Slumber Party” featuring Princess Nokia, although there’s a lot to praise on the charts this week. In terms of Worst of the Week, it’s probably going to go to Fred again.. and The Blessed Madonna for “Marea (We’ve Lost Dancing)”, with a Dishonourable Mention for, sadly, Dave’s “Mercury” featuring Kamal. I would like to note that Taylor Swift was awfully closer than she should be to getting that this week. Here’s this week’s top 10:

What to expect from this week? Gosh, I don’t know. AJ Tracey? Young Thug? Either way, we’ll see whatever happens to all this – whether it gets flooded out or they all end up sticking around – next week, so I’ll see you then. Thanks for reading.

[obsessedbybucky]

do all the questions :x (now i'm the small dick with a lot of balls)

Here I did them all bb

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?There's this guy I've been talking to for more or less three weeks and I've gone to see him at his job and chill with him and all and he looked interested. He even asked me to come hang out by his place this morning. It was the single most boring morning I've ever had. We didn't do anyhing, kiss/sex/etc, and all he did was talk and drink and smoke and play with his tattoo things, idk man. Then he tells me he's going to sleep and I'm ???? Ok??? So I left, and before I left he told me he would text me when he woke up. He didnt. Idk man.

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?The only person that's ever done that to me was one of my best friend's ex I fucked on his birthday. He was sweet. My best friend was happy for us but it didn't work so

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?Nah fam

4: Do you find it easy to trust others?Very

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?Sleeping and I received a text from my friend saying her significant other was just being diagnosed with cancer.

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?Me, myself and I probably

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?Probably nothing lmao

8: Are you close with your dad?Haven't seen him in a decade

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?Damn I wish

10: What are you listening to?Some NSYNC

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?Mcdonald's Caramel Iced Coffee

12: Do you like hickeys?Never had one

13: What time do you go to bed?Around 9 am

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?544444444444444rThis is kinda sad but my best friend. Also Lucas but fuck Lucas.

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?Not really lmao

16: Do you always answer your texts?Depends on who's texting

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?Yeah man. What he did what unnecessary and uncalled for.

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?Some hours ago

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?Probably my best friend. And up until yesterday morning, it was the guy from question 1

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?"I hope he really will text me later"

21: Is anyone else in the room with you?Nope

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?Yeah man

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?Yeah, I was at the peak of my happiness

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?So many people man

25: In the past week, have you cried?I don't remember tbh

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?Grey, black and blue

27: Do people ever call you by your last name?When I was younger

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?The guy from question 1

29: Do you have a best friend?I have two

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?Yeah, even though it was a whole month ago and I know he wants nothing to do with me

31: Who was your last call/text message from?One of my two best friend

32: Are you mad at anyone?So many people tbh

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?I only ever kissed one person that was younger than me

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?23 or 24, I'm not sure

35: How many more days until your birthday?92 days

36: Do you have any summer plans yet?Not really

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?Not really

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?Yep

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?Yep

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?Ah man, so many times

41: Do you think age matters in relationships?Depends, really

42: Are you available?As fuck

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?at least 5, not sure if there's more though

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?I want my lip piercing back

45: Do you believe exes can be friends?Hell to the nope

46: Do you regret anything?So many things man

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?The fact that my best friend's significant other's got cancer and the dude from question 1. In between these questions I went to a McDonald's to get some iced coffee and I wanted to get some cigarettes and he works at the gas station next to it and I knew he finished at 7 and it was past 7 so I went to go there but I saw him so I noped the fuck out and I told my sister to get my cigs for me and he told her he saw me nope the f out on my way there. it's been 45 minutes, I thought he would text me to ask me why but nah. He just doesnt give a fuck man, depresses me.

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?Yeah

49: Was your last kiss a mistake?Not really, he was the most gorgeous person I've ever kissed. Even though he was a real asshole afterwards, 18/10 would do it again

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?I don't think he likes me, he actually made it pretty clear.

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?Yep. Some awkward story, let me tell you

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?He works at my job so if we work together he talks to me, idk

53: What was the last thing you ate?Cookies

54: Did you get any compliments today?No, which is a shame bc look at me, i'm gorgeous

55: Where are you going on your next vacation?Back to Montreal bitchessssss

56: Do you own anything from other countries?Yeah, some things I bought when I was in New York. The other things are from ebay and shit.

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?Girls

58: Where have you lived most of your life?Charlevoix, Quebec, Canada, which is disgusting

59: When was the last time you took a long drive?Last weekend

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?No???? And I dont know why???

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?Nope

62: Who do you text the most?My best friend

63: What was the last movie you saw?Begin Again I think, of Me Before You

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?Have no bf/gf

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?Lmao under 0

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?Nope

67: Do you curse around your parents?I do

68: Are you happy with where you live?Kinda

69: Picture of yourself?Nah

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?I don't even really believe in relationships tbh. I'm 18 and never had any

71: Have you ever been dumped?We weren't in a relationship but it did felt like I was dumped real hard

72: What do you most like about making out?The touching and the kissing, idk, I just love everything about it.

73: Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?Lmao always

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?Them

75: What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?The stomach. If they have abs, there's 96% chance I'd bang them

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?My best friend

77: Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?Lmao yeah

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?Happened once

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?When someone kisses me

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?Yeah why not

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?Yeah, awkward

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?YEAH LMAO

83: Do you miss your last sweetie?No, fuck that fucktard

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?Never

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?Nope, except when I was like 11

86: How can I win your heart?Be attractive and give me compliments.

87: What is your astrological sign?Taurus

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?Sleeping man

89: Do you cook?Does mac and cheese count?

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?Yeah omg weirdly

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?Sometimes yes, but then I remember I'm a hoe that wants to fuck a lot of people so

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?Let's put it like that, I've only ever had sex with the same person more than once once, and I did him twice.

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?I'm very superficial tbh, I like twinks. I love it when they're small.

94: Name four things that you wish you had!A beautiful person to fuck withAt least 2k$A penis and no boobs sometimesFriends tbh

95: Are you a player?I am

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?I think the most I did was like 4 different people in one evening. Wasn't even playing spin the bottle or anything

97: Are you a tease?yeah

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?No :(

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?Nope

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?Yeah

101: Hugs or Kisses?Kisses

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?yeah

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?The ass or the stomach

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?yep

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?Yeah I'm a hoe

106: Do you flirt a lot?yep

107: Your last kiss?Okay so I was out at a bar with some friends and when the bar closed, I got my cellphone and I saw this dude from work texted me and I answered and he replied instantly back. Some friends wanted to go up to this dude's hotel room and I didn't wanna and I couldn't find a taxi. So I drunk called the dude and asked him to come and get me. Which he did. Lots of shit were said during the hella long car drive and once we were at my place, I don't really remember if I kissed him before the bj happened but I definitely kissed him before he got out of my apartment. So yeah.

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?lmao way more

109: Have you kissed anyone in the past month?The dude from 107

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?Justin Timberlake or Dylan O'brien tbh

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next?I thought it was the guy I saw yesterday morning but now idk

112: Does someone like you currently?I don't think so

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone?Nah

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?Flings bc hoe

115: Ever made out with just a friend?Yep

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship?Single I guess, never had any relationships.