#Hermione and ron are 1000% done with Dumbledore's plans

[wellpresseddaisy]

But with the Dawn, a New Day is Born pt 1

I have 0 self control when it comes to a new AU. The title comes from the 1931 song Goodnight Sweetheart. I recommend the Bing Crosby version (and also his version of P.S. I love you from a similar vintage).

I probably wouldn't have written this without some enabling from @sneverussape so thank you, friend. Now we all get Harry being Very Confused by a Tom Riddle who mostly isn't a homicidal dick and a Ron who is going to do his level best to make Dumbledore regret taking up teaching. Hermione is going to enjoy the hell out of the library and not having to only research things to save people's lives.

Harry startled as Ron and Hermione melted out of the trees to stand on either side of him. They weren’t shades of themselves, they were solid…and he’d dropped the stone already, anyway. They were real and breathing and they were with him.

“What are you doing?” His voice shook.

“Dumbledore may be convinced that you’re the one he needs to kill, but we aren’t letting you do it alone.” Ron set his jaw in a way Harry knew. Argument was pointless.

“We’ve done everything together.” Hermione continued, her own voice shaking. “And we aren’t…well, three is a magical number too, isn’t it?”

“But you have families.” Harry insisted. Hermione, in his other side, mumbled something he only caught snatches of.

Steadfast in this fateful hour

I place my magic with all its power,

And the sun with its brightness,

And the snow with its whiteness,

And fire with all the strength it hath,

“Think my mum knows.” Ron tried to smile, but it twisted. “She sent her love, you know, for all of us. Said she’d make them understand.”

“Your mum?” Harry couldn’t finish.

And lightning with its rapid wrath,

And the winds with their swiftness along their path,

And Black Lake with its deepness,

“Yeah. She doesn’t want to…after her brothers…I reckon she knows us all pretty well at this point. Anyway, she loves us.”

And the hills with their steepness,

And the moors with their starkness:

      All these I place,

      With my friends help and grace

Between this world and the bringer of darkness.

They’d reached the clearing.

-----------------

After…after Voldemort accepted their triple sacrifice, after the green glow enveloped them, they tumbled together on the floor of Kings Cross, only it was much neater than Harry ever remembered it. So terribly white, really, from the lights to the tiles.

“I didn’t think there’d be an after.” Ron croaked.

“Neither did I.” Hermione’s voice quavered. “I hoped…”

Harry coughed, spat up something foul, and rolled to his feet. “What was that you were saying, Hermione?”

His voice sounded as raspy as his throat felt. Whatever he’d hacked up and spat on the floor pulsed there, thick and black and wet. Instinctively, he herded the other two away from it.

“A version of St. Patrick’s Rune.” Hermione admitted, flushing a bit. “I found it in the library at Grimmauld, tucked away in something ancient. Someone marked it as ‘for absolute life or death emergencies’ so I memorized it. I didn’t know if it would work for me. I’m not sure if it was meant to do…this.” She gestured at their surroundings.

He couldn’t say anything. There weren’t words enough in the world to say anything to Hermione and Ron, who loved him enough to walk with him into death. He launched himself at Ron with all the coordination of a drunk Niffler. Ron caught him, pulled him close, and Hermione crowded in from his other side. They stood for a moment, just breathing, just holding on.

“Thank you. Thank you thank you thank you.” Harry tried to tamp down on the ridiculous urge to cry as he mumbled into Ron’s chest .

(Even in the after…after he couldn’t be as tall as he wanted, which was a crock in Harry’s opinion.)

“As if we would do anything else.” Hermione huffed. “We’ve walked with you every step of the way and we aren’t abandoning you now.”

‘You’d probably muck up your…after by feeling guilty without us.” Ron pointed out, patting his back. “D’you think we’re waiting for a train?”

“The three of you,” a voice that reminded him of an annoyed Dumbledore came from behind them. “Are not supposed to be anywhere together.”

They turned as one, Ron trying to shove Harry and Hermione behind him. Harry decided that actually, Ron could take this one.

“I am meant to be meeting Mr. Potter to discuss his options.” It was Dumbledore, if you’d known him in the 1930s. Harry remembered the pictures.

“Huh, no wonder old Grindy went for him.” Ron mused.

Harry tried to muffle the semi-hysterical giggles that threatened.

Hermione thumped her head against his back. “Do not tell him what you think of his plans. Do not tell him what you think of his plans.” She whispered.

“But, as we seem to have had a change of plans, Mr. Potter’s options are no longer what they once were. You will no doubt be happy to know that Mr. Longbottom ended Nagini right before the three of you created a magical backlash that took out the Death Eater encampment and the Acromantula colony.” He spoke as sternly as Dumbledore ever did.

“Good on Nev.” Ron cheered. “You said something about options?”

Death, Ron discovered, took away pretty much all the terror of Dumbledore being upset with him. What was he going to do, dock points? Could people in the waiting room, if that’s what this was, have high blood pressure? Had anyone ever tried?

“I am no longer allowed to discuss options. That has been decided by…others. While I am not pleased with this disruption in a delicate plan, I am proud of your loyalty to one another and to the world you lived in.”

“Well we weren’t daft enough to let Harry walk off to his death. Figured we had the best chance of joining him and it wouldn’t be the same if we weren’t together.” Ron shrugged. “So, we just hopped on that next big adventure.”

Dumbledore opened his mouth, shut it with a snap, and then turned on his heel and stalked off, muttering something under his breath about the sanctity of life after death being lost on Weasleys.

“I hope he has to spend all his time with Great Grand Aunt Wilhelmina and Great Grand Uncle Bilius. They were in his class at Hogwarts and it would serve him right.” Ron muttered, making both Harry and Hermione snicker.

“I suppose now we wait?” Harry asked. “I wonder if a train will come.”

No train came and no one was quite sure how long they waited after Dumbledore stomped off in a huff. Pocket watches didn’t work, wherever they were. It was sort of pleasant, though, not having anywhere to be. Hermione still had her beaded bag, and after a little while she produced a non-magical deck of cards.

“Anyone for rummy?”

They played fourteen hands of rummy and three of hearts before they were interrupted again, which was just as well because Hermione and Ron were bickering over Hermione counting cards. Harry worked on ‘improving’ his own hand from the deck while they were occupied. They never noticed, not when they really got going.

“Beg pardon?”

They whipped around, staring at the young woman just stepping out of a doorway that didn’t used to exist.

“Are you here to take us with you?” Harry asked unsteadily.

“That…it isn’t an option yet. What you three did…well, you upset any number of those much higher up than me.” The woman chuckled. “In any case, they’ve decided to send you…sideways a bit. Finish your unfinished business.”

“What does that mean?” Hermione asked.

“You’re going to be sent…elsewhere. It’ll be 1941, and…it gets a bit complicated here, I’m afraid.” She sighed. “There’s only so much we can do when we get an, er…special delivery like you three. How to explain this? Well, you’ll keep your current memories because there are limits and we aren’t interested in playing dolls with people. You’ll have an…overlay, I suppose, of your 1941-current memories. I’m afraid before Hogwarts won’t be much fun, but we have to explain the twitchiness since we aren’t in the business of wiping people’s personalities away. You’re going back as firsties. That was a non-negotiable. As I said, you made quite a few people upset.”

“Will we be ourselves?” Hermione seemed to be absorbing everything they were told.

“You and Mr. Potter will be Harry and Hermione Perhalion. Mr. Weasley will be Galahad Weasley.”

“Why don’t I get to keep my name?” Ron looked disgusted at the thought of being Galahad.

“Because we can only change the essential nature of a Weasley so much, we aren’t making any of you have new faces, and the Weasley family isn’t slated to have a Ronald for a few generations yet.” The woman answered sternly. “We do try not to meddle too much, unlike certain teenagers.”

“You said we had unfinished business?” Harry picked up where Hermione left off.

“None of you finished school or did any of the things you might have done. And you, Mr. Potter, are actually going to feel the feelings you bottled up on your last go-round.” She poked him in the chest. “No more hiding behind anger. No stuffing everything into the feelings barn.”

“I…what?” Harry stared.

“Do any of you read the…bugger but that one’s in the future. Never mind that. It was from the New Yorker.”

“Oh, my parents like the long-form journalism.” Hermione said brightly.

“Yes,” the woman replied slowly. “They would.”

“Is my unfinished business now a quest to change my name?” Ron asked acidly, clearly trying to change the subject.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” The woman snapped.

“My name is now Galahad. I can’t help it.”

The woman raised her hand and snapped and all Harry knew was darkness.

[vivithefolle]

You're so right I stg, I thought about writing Harry in hogwarts where he was forced to defend himself, but all that came was just a blank. Harry's equipped with the most heaviest, ridiculous plot armour. He had no backup, no plan, just throwing myself at Voldie and hoping for the best, but wait! The power of love ended the war, and with his infitesmal knowledge of magic, he decides to throw the same disarming spell at the Dark lord! 1/2

Like, I get as a child you can get starstruck by how cool Harry is and saddened by his upbringing, I mean there's a reason why it's called a children's book, but this is getting ridiculous! I mean, I can't even count how many times Harry threw himself at the death's door (with his martyr complex and all) saved by plot armour. It's just the same schtick through the series, some kind of mystery's going on, Harry's in danger, and there he is, saved by plot armour. Again! (2/2) 

Harry practically just... gets things given to him, falling into his lap. As if he wasn’t special enough as the Boy-Who-Lived already, then he’s the Youngest Seeker In A Century and allowed to do shit because he... broke the rules, but it’s okay because he’s just so special like that.

Like even the Triwizard Tournament for god’s sake. Crouch Jr has to give him the answers, with assorted side characters coming to save Harry’s ass - Cedric explains the egg clue to him, Dobby brings the effing Gillyweed, like, Harry doesn’t get anything done himself. He NEVER gets things done by himself. It’s good in a way because it shows that he NEEDS people, it’s realistic, but he’s just so consistently passive and inactive, it also makes you realize that he’s... never gonna do a damn thing. He doesn’t accomplish shit. He just drifts from plot point to plot point, carried around by his friends who pratically do everything (see Philosopher’s Stone, see Chamber of Secrets, see Prisoner of Azkaban, see Deathly Hallows) before he fails to save the day and only escapes thanks to the Plot inventing yet another way for him to escape.

First it was the fact that he could burn Quirrel with love apparently, then it’s Godric Gryffindor saying “scabbards are lame, I’ll take my sword outta my hat instead so that one kid 1000 later who needs it to kill a Basilisk will be able to do it”, then it’s “oh Hermione here, take the power of FUCKING TIME TRAVEL so you can lend it to Harry in his time of need k bye”, then “hey remember when Ollivander mentioned something about Harry and Voldemort’s wands being twins? Well uh turns out that uh twins wands can do uuuh an event horizon if used against each other yeah. why did Ollivander doesn’t just tell Harry this instead of issuing a cryptic warning is anyone’s guess lol”. Later on it’s “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUCKERS” Dumbledore who plain saves Harry’s ass in the nick of time while he was busy being useless, then it’s Dumbledore again doing everything and bypassing every obstacle while Harry is just like “duuuh”, and in Deathly Hallows everyone, from Hermione to Ron to Dobby to yeah basically everyone that isn’t a Death Eater saves Harry from straining his brain cells too hard, and in the end it’s not even Harry’s skill that saves him, it’s... the fact that the Elder Wand isn’t ok with killing for bullshit plot reasons. How grand. How inspiring.

Even the “abuse” Harry suffers from the Dursleys is... they just read like Roald Dahl characters, Saturday morning cartoon villains, so over-the-top and ridiculous I can’t take them seriously for a second. I wrote a whole Quora answer about it.

[howtotrainyouragents]

Agent H’s Book Reactions

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone by J. K. Rowling

Orphaned Harry Potter is on his way to the adventure of a lifetime when he discovers that he is a wizard and is going to the magical school, Hogwarts.

-It’s been ages since I’ve done a Bite-Sized Book Review, so hello to me, hello to you all again, and hello to all new people on this mess of a blog!

-So my sisters and I always do something Harry Potter-related around the holidays, so this year I decided to reread one of the books, and since I wasn’t interested in making myself unnecessarily stressed or depressed, I decided to go for the first book! 

-All my life I’ve referred to this book through the American not English title, but for some reason, I could not for the life of me stop calling it “Philosopher’s Stone” this time around. Also, I didn’t realize that we had the American version (badly beaten up too!) and I had quite a moment when they said things like “Mom” and “Merry Christmas”.

-I LOVE MY SON HARRY JAMES POTTER WITH ALL OF MY HEART. He is so sweet and good and unassuming. He doesn’t want fame or attention, he just wants family and love (guys, I cried at the Mirror of Erised part). He sticks up for those hurting and he just tries so hard to do good; he braves his way through the trials because it’s the right thing to do. He’s also really smart and perceptive. (I know it’s a joke that he isn’t, but he really is. He just doesn’t care half the time that’s all).  AT THE SAME TIME, he’s a sassy little shit with zero (0) chill, oh my goodness. I can’t get enough of this boy. Why don’t people love him more? Come talk to me about him any time of the day.

-This gets its own bullet point: I cried when Harry got the photo album of his parents. All he wanted was a family, and he was so obsessed with the Mirror because he finally got one. But in a way Hagrid gave him his family again in a health way this time, and that is such an incredibly beautiful thing Hagrid did, and now I’m crying again

-Ron is so absolutely precious and I just absolutely adore this boy. He and Harry are precious and I just love this boy oh my goodness. He’s so Down to Fight literally any time of the day. Also, when he’s award the points at the end, all the attention and all his brothers are cheering for him, and that’s all he wanted

-I love how Bossy and arrogant and human Hermione is. She’s 1000% better in the books than the movies. Also, she’s absolutely so gung-ho about school BECAUSE SHE’S IN A WIZARD SCHOOL AND SHE DOESN’T WANT TO BE KICKED OUT.

-If I remember correctly, JKR wasn’t planning Romione at this point but she really should have been bc right from the start she gives them such a strong dynamic.

-Neville’s growth! Beautiful child, I love him

-I didn’t realize that the first kid Harry met was Malfoy! LOL

-I’ve always been of the mindset that yes JKR did plan stuff amazingly well, but she did not plan stuff THAT well; however, this book makes me give her more credit bc I did not realize she included some stuff this early in the game: 1) Dumbledore lies about what he sees in the Mirror of Erised (Do I believe that JKR knew he was seeing Grindelwald, fuck no. But that’s a smart choice to leave open-ended) 2) Harry thinks Snape can read his mind 3) Dumbledore says that James saved Snape’s life 4) Harry asks why Voldemort wants to kill him and Dumbledore tells him he’ll know when he’s ready 

-I’m of the camp that Dumbledore was deeply manipulative (it’s basically stated that he manipulated this situation so that Harry goes for the Stone), but at the same time I love this Dumbledore who is a funny and kind person. Who knows his students are hungry and instead of giving a long speech spouts “Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!” and lets them eat. Dumbledore who makes lame jokes to his students. Dumbledore who is gentle with Harry....I just, I think Dumbledore is all of those things: manipulating Harry to win the war, but also someone who does care about students and Harry and his job. I think its possible to be both. 

-Knowing the end, I love seeing the little foreshadowing moments and details

-You know as a kid I just thought the Dursley were mean, but holy guacamole that’s just straight up abuse. I was really sad he had to go back at the end (And especially how in the second book you find out it wasn’t a good summer) before, but now I’m just terrified for him. Unrelated, but I can’t believe autocorrect knows I was trying to spell Dursley. Apple is a HP nerd. 

-It’s so much fun to see how JKR’s writing has improved since this first book....And how much its fallen since then.

-I love the original covers. I wish our books weren’t so beaten up

-So the punishment for students being out of bed is to make them stay out of bed? And go into the forbidden forest with dangerous creatures???