#Hi honey...I'm home

[143bc]

[talos-stims]

SAY "HELLO! HONEY, I'M HOME!" / THREE VOICES COME, ALL ALONE

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[vileplume87]

Being in tmbg fandom is crazy because I can look at the most obscure dial a song demos or old late night show performance recordings and see the same 15 people in the comments almost every time and if I don't it feels like I discovered a new planet

[lorogy662]

"SO, WITH ADVICE OF THE DEAD, AND A HALO OVER MY HEAD"

[lupins-hehim-pussy]

Neuvillette's body language in my mind ranges from curious feline, to Long Cryptid that lingers just outside the door when you're falling asleep

[buttfrovski]

axe is kinda fucking sick bro

[behindfairytales]

BRADLEY FREEGARD as King Canute Vikings: Valhalla, Leap of Faith (2.06)

[mortallycolourfulfun]

Ykw Joker's gotta be the flirtiest silent protagonist I've ever seen

[razzle-zazzle]

when the old aus come back and grab you by the throat

[manahiel]

turns out, Peter is not the only one who is afraid of ghosts.

[givehimthemedicine]

what if El's never seen anyone sick before so when Will gets a cold and looks a bit off kilter and sweaty she thinks he's possessed again and launches into full s2 exorcism mode about it

[covenofthearticulate]

We're both staunchly in the headcanon camp that Louis loves the scent of coffee and will buy coffee/go to cafes just for the scent and ambiance, and I was just wondering: What do you think Louis' favorite cafe to hangout is like, and why?

GOOD QUESTION I honestly think it depends on his mood. He wanders back and forth between those Kitch-y Hipster spots with hanging plants and matcha drinks, the Bougie Artisan coffee shops with leather seats and brass cups, and the run down, local, hole-in-the-wall spots with sticky vinyl seats and a waitress who slides a hot coffee into his hand without him having to say a word.

He'll die before stepping foot into a Peet's or Starbucks lmfao.

If he's more in the mood for people watching, I also think he's a big big fan of like college student-run coffee shops, or coffee shops inside of museums/bookshops/other cultural institutions! College coffee shops are especially close to his heart, though, because they're open pretty much 24/7 and no one ever judges him when he rolls in looking like a mess at 1am just looking to sit down and press his face against a hot cup of tea. He's coached many a freshman through their first Midterm Paper 3am Crisis.

But if he's in the mood to just vibe and maybe read a book, he's 100% going to a place like this:

fun fact: this is an actual coffee shop in my home town but I've only gone a handful of times because their coffee was too expensive LOL but the vibes were impeccable. I think Louis would be just about the only person in the world who would actually read those prop books on the shelf asdfghcjvbksrf

[tplambies]

ghost and pals bfs

[danthropologie]

Red Bull referring to Daniel as “prodigal”, celebrating his Monza win, and calling him a genuinely “good bloke” just like Daniel’s instagram comment about DTS….Christian is like I didn’t get to talk about this on DTS but don’t mistake me, fuck that ugly orange team. Love it.

https://www.redbullracing.com/int-en/seven-signs-that-2023-is-going-to-be-huge

wow you're SO absolutely correct, nothing more to add

[softquietsteadylove]

drama for the runaway bride au: A man from the nearby village has seen Thena at Gilgameshs little forest house and informed royal guards who informed the King and now they're standing in front of Gilgameshs door again and invite themselves in and they're dragging Thena back to the castle

Gil smiled down at the flowers in his hand. Thena would love them--they were soft and white and lovely, just like her. He would put them in some water when he got home, maybe after dinner. Thena was probably chopping vegetables this very second. She was getting better at it.

It had been almost a year since she found him--or since he found her, maybe it was better to say. The beautiful bride he found hiding in a tree trunk was no longer a lost little fawn. She had come to learn everything that was required to keep the house in good order. She had taken over those duties all together when he'd been injured.

The cabin was as much hers as it was his, as far as he was concerned.

And it was high time he tell her as much, too. Maybe it was silly to do something so formally when she had indeed lived alongside him all this time. He often blushed to remember that they even shared a bed. But he felt he had to say something--let her know just how important it was to him that she was here.

"No, let go of me!"

The flowers dropped from Gil's hand. He took off in a run, his feet slipping faintly as he charged towards the house, a royal carriage parked out front.

"Get off me!" Thena screamed, so unlike her usual self. But she was a force to be reckoned with, clawing and thrashing, teeth bared like a wild animal.

"Your highness, please," the men pleaded with her.

"Let her go!" Gil bellowed before he could even think about it. All he knew was that he could see Thena being taken away, and he had to stop it. "Get away from her!"

"The lumberjack is back!"

"Stop him!"

"He has a weapon!"

"No!" Thena pulled against the suits of armour holding each of her arms. "No, don't hurt him!"

Gil slid to a stop, holding his axe but eyeing the line of royal soldiers with their swords pointed at him. "What do you think you're doing with her?"

"The princess is coming with us!"

"Like hell she is," he snarled at them. He would fight all of them, outnumbered or not, if he had to. "You're not going anywhere with my Thena."

"Gil!" she cried out for him. She managed to pull away from her captors, shoving the men out of her way until she could stand in front of him. "Enough!"

"Your highness, move!" the frontmost man barked at her.

"No!" she barked right back at him (that was his Thena). "Or would you rather report to my father than you've run me through trying to capture an innocent man?"

The guards did lower their weapons, although it didn't do much to make Gil feel better about the whole thing. The captain glared at him. "He is no innocent man, your highness. The lumberjack stands accused of kidnapping and holding the princess hostage."

"There is no such crime," Thena stated, although it seemed that - princess or not - her word didn't weigh as much as it should to the men facing them.

"His majesty has been searching, my lady," the captain scowled at her, still standing in front of Gil to protect him. "For nigh on a year, now."

It was a year this very day, actually.

"Then tell him you've found me," Thena challenged, her shoulders squared and her braid sliding off her shoulder and down her back. "Tell him you've found me and that I refuse to return."

The other guards looked between themselves. They were just men following orders, doing their jobs, trying to feed themselves and their families.

"I cannot, your highness."

"Well I won't be going with you, so you may pick which is a worse fate," Thena snipped at him, grasping Gil's hand behind her. "But if a hair on this man's head is hurt, I will have the lot of you executed."

Gil blinked. The men didn't seem to take her all that seriously, but he would be trembling in his armour if he were in their shoes. They hadn't seen her furious at the end of a long day when he'd forgotten to wipe his muddy boots off yet again.

"Princess Thena," the captain resumed his attempt at reasoning with her. He stepped forward, hand on his chest (and off his weapon). "Not only your father but your fiance the prince has also-"

"I have no fiance, captain," Thena cut him off without even batting an eye. "And if there is a snivelling pup inhabiting the castle saying he is, then I mourn for the days of your honour as a royal guard."

Damn, she really had a way with words, especially when they were insulting.

"My lady, I implore you," the captain bent at the waist and bowed to her. "I am not to return without you, sworn on my life."

Thena sighed. She wouldn't be responsible for something like that--she refused to be. Gil gave her hand a squeeze, "captain?"

"Highness?" he peeked up at her, a little too eager for how little time had passed.

"If my father has threatened you all with death," she held her head high. "Then I suggest you run away."

The men paled.

"These forests are deep. You could find the village, start anew, take your families and leave the prison my father calls a castle. But I will not return there with you, and if your lives depend on me doing so, then I am telling you now to save yourselves."

"Highness," another guard interjected, although Gil got the sense that he wasn't really allowed to speak up so freely. "If it's about the lumberjack, perhaps your father would employ-"

"Silence!"

Gil shrank slightly, and he was behind her! The men facing them flinched.

"My father," she said it like she would talk about hay mould, or spiders, or wild boars. Her eyes locked with the guard, "is not fit to stand in the same room as the man behind me."

"H-Highness-"

"Stop calling me that!"

"Princess," the captain took the reins again, his voice raising. "I have been ordered to bring you back. And I regret to inform you that I am to use any means necessary to do so."

"Truly?" she didn't back down from the threat, but still stood close enough to Gil that no one would be able to approach him without her being in the way. "Would you tie me up and kidnap me, captain? Would you apprehend the crown princess?"

"If I must, my lady," he informed her with an equal lack of remorse. "I was ordered to retrieve you, alive, but by no means was I told to do so with gentility. And if I must bring you back by force, then so be it."

Gil gripped his axe again. He didn't like where this was headed. Thena backed up into him even more, pressing her back to his chest. Her hand gripped the handle of his axe, throwing off his grip. She didn't want him to fight.

"I'm sure my resistance will be attributed to my so called 'kidnapper' fighting you off?" Thena assumed aloud.

"Aye," the captain confirmed.

"Then I must tell you..."

Gil held his breath same as the guards did. He didn't know what she had up her sleeve, but it had better be good. It really seemed like everyone's lives were depending on it.

"That I have already married him."

What was that now?

The men traded looks, most horrified, a few more curious than anything. The captain looked positively flushed with rage. "I beg your pardon."

"I have married this man," Thena proclaimed like it was nothing. She wound their fingers together.

"Each and every marriage must be officiated properly, your highness." The captain looked mortified, but in an angry way. "Your father will never recognise it as a lawful union."

"Then I suppose you will have to go and tell him regardless."

"Thena," he breathed against her hair. He wasn't sure if this would only invite more trouble down the line or not, especially considering it was a bold faced lie. But he went with it.

"That his daughter has run off and had a bastardisation of a marriage in the woods with some lowly peasant?!"

Gil huffed; he wasn't rich by any means, but he wasn't sure if he was a peasant, either. He had just worked at the castle not two weeks ago!

"Yes," she persisted, "tell him exactly that, or anything else. But he may know that I love the man I am with, and that I will not return to his gilded cage to be sold like chattel."

The captain sighed deeply. If looks could kill, he would be on trial for regicide, "if that is what her highness wishes."

"It is an order."

As if the word 'order' were a magic spell, the men all snapped up straighter, heels together. "Ma'am!"

"Then we must inform the king," the captain declared, pulling back his tiny battalion to deliver truly terrible news.

"I wish you luck," Thena sent them off with the snide wish, crossing her arms as they loaded into the carriages again. She kept glaring until they were dragging themselves off the beaten path and back to the main road again.

Gil let out a breath once they were out of sight. He leaned on his knees, heart hammering, "wow."

Thena also sighed, turning around to face him. "I suppose we will have to be prepared for the possibility that the magistrate will come knocking next."

"Uh, Thena?"

"Perhaps Eros will come with some fake document to state that I am not legally allowed to marry anyone but him," she continued, rolling her eyes and sorting out her braid again, "like a land deed."

"Thena," Gil tried again.

"As much as I never want to see him again, I would pay any price to see the image of my father's face when he finds out his crown jewel has-"

"Thena!" he interrupted, not at all yelling at her but certainly not keeping quiet anymore. He stood to his full height again, smiling at her, "married, are we?"

Finally faced with the consequences of her lie, she looked down at the ground between them, quickly flushing rouge. "U-Uh, w-well-"

"Wish I had known," he chuckled, trying to get a peek at her face, "I'd have gotten you a gift, darling."

She squirmed, toying with the edge of her apron (which none of the guards noticed was literally made from her once-wedding dress). "I had to think of something they couldn't argue with me about."

"No, I guess you were right," Gil chuckled, throwing his arm over her shoulders and pulling her closer, "now I just have to worry about your dad busting down my door, huh?"

"Please," she scoffed at the very idea, "Father hasn't set food outside the castle in well over two decades. I think he would sooner write me off as missing and deceased than lift a finger to verify it himself."

Gil wasn't sure if that was so true, but he couldn't do anything but take her word for it at the moment. He kissed her forehead, "are you okay?"

She sighed, leaning against his chest, tugging at the suspenders over his flannel shirt. "I tried to hide again but they circled the house and took me. I was worried...I thought you wouldn't-"

"Hey, okay, sh," he whispered, pressing his nose to her temple as she sniffed back her tears. He had been scared of that very thing. "It's okay, nothing like that is gonna happen."

Neither of them could guarantee that.

Thena put her hands on his hips, while he did the same for her. "I'm sorry to lie like that."

He shook his head. He didn't mind it nearly as much as she thought he did. Maybe he minded that it wasn't actually true, but that was for a later date. "It is our anniversary, actually."

Thena smiled, their foreheads meeting gently. She rose on her toes, just enough to touch her lips to his, "happy anniversary, my sweet lumberjack."

[dadbodbuck]

tell me bout all your wips

yippee!!!

ok in order from "front burner" to "back burner" (an arbitrary decision that changes all the time and does not mean anything for publishing timeframe):

- buck 1.0/begins tommy: i've posted about this, i mess with the timeline a bit and tommy is buck's mentor through his probie term. they have nasty toxic workplace sex that makes them both worse. tagged with "fic tag: closet case/1.0". current title is "fuck my face, closet case"

- eddie breakdown fic: eddie has a breakdown after chris leaves and attempts suicide. it's a really angsty fic but with a happy ending because i can't do MCD. also a flagrant attempt for me to process having a mentally ill father through christopher. current title is "all your letters in the sand cannot heal me like your hand"

- eviller doug au: another REALLY dark fic where doug grooms buck when he's a teenager (14-17) which is also a trauma processing fic for me (don't ask why i have 2 trauma processing fics so far up the front of this list i've had a bad month). current title is "HONEY, I'M HOME"

- old school kidfic: the 118 get Blasted With Lasers and it temporarily de-ages them physically and mentally by ~25 years. bobby is ~33, hen and chim are both ~15, eddie is 11, buck is 6

- ecologist!buck au: MY BABY MY BELOVED MY DEAREST. based in my own personal experiences as an ecologist. buck moves in next to eddie and starts turning his house into an ecologists paradise, chris takes immediate interest, eddie is sexually repressed about the hot smart beefy sweaty man next door who keeps adopting busted up animals. maddie is also a marine biologist and there's an extensive b plot about madney falling in love via maddie helping chim overcome his fear of animals. and there's also a lobster heist. tommy guest stars as a wildlife rehabilitater. working title is "kitchen table ecology" snip uploaded before i started my fic tagging system :(

- maddie single mom au: maddie stays with doug a little longer and gets pregnant, she leaves him ~2020 instead of ~2019 and is one of the women from the mudslide house. madney-centric

- eddie adopts a cat: exactly what it says on the box. set during the eddie breakdown era. one snip uploaded under "fic tag: magnolia"

honorable mention: the buddie qpr fic that's currently 75% uploaded and i went 2 years without updating i'm so sorry to everyone who's enjoyed that fic so far i promise it'll get done at some point 💀

EVEN THESE ARE NOT ALL MY WIPS THESE ARE JUST THE ONES WITH MORE THAN A FEW PAGES WRITTEN