#I HOPE IT WASNT THE LINK I SENT IN THE GROUP CHAT

[kathren-doodles]

I found you 👃

ARHG HOWWWW

[xoxo-teddybear]

He’s Lost - Bakugou Katsuki - Part 3

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: fluff, sexual mentions, smut, 18+, daddy kink, fingering (fisting?), f!receiving, alcohol, cursing, LONG WRITING PIECE, Bakusquad a teensy wheensy bit ooc, BAKUGOU BEING A BIG ASS SIMP

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Summary: After the classroom moment, Katsuki’s been doing everything he can to get you back. You’ve both come to terms as friends who are mutually pining for one another, but how long will it take to finally be found by one another?

A/N: Y’all I just have to keep saying thank you to all of you. The love and support is incredible and I never expected my one shot to be so likeable. Anyways, this piece is what will bring the whole story together. Just HELLA fluff. Hope you enjoy!

A/N: If you guys are curious as to what I put for Y/N’s quirk, I’ve titled it Phoenix. She has all the abilities of a Phoenix, like fire powers, regeneration, and flight ability with beautiful wings of fire that can come out on command. Honestly, her quirk isn’t really a big deal in the story but if you wanted to know, there you go.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

“YOU DID WHAT?!”

“I fucked her in the classroom,” Bakugou so calmly said while taking a sip from his water bottle.

Kirishima felt like he was gonna faint. He told his friend to talk to her so they could make up. He didn’t expect him to dick her down.

“Wow Kacchan, didn’t know you were an exhibitionist,” The electric blonde said while nudging Bakugou in the arm with his elbow.

“I’m not......well-“

“Katsuki” Kirishima said with a warning tone because he did NOT want to hear about his friend’s kinks.

“Right. Anyway, it was fine. No one was there...actually why weren’t you guys there? We all had class you idiots.” Bakugou asked.

“Mr. Aizawa told us the day before that we were going to meet up in gym gamma for an all day training sesh. So we were all shocked when one of our best fighters didn’t show.” Kirishima explained.

“Well nobody told me we were having an all day session.” Bakugou complained.

The group then raised their phones showing the texts sent to the group chat the boys of the Bakusquad shared.

8:47 a.m.

🦈 : Bakugou, tmr is all day training in the gym. Make sure you’re there

11:21 a.m.

🕷: You gonna be in the gym wit us tmrw Bakugou?

2:10 a.m.

⚡️: Sooo we’ll see u in the gym tmr Kacchan?

After some silence and Bakugou’s soft “oh,” Bakugou asked another question. “Well why wasnt Y/N there then?”

“Just like you, the girl wasn’t in class the day before so she didn’t know. She spent the day interning with Hawks.” Sero stated while taking a break from his bag of chips.

‘Hawks huh? Guess it made sense. You both had bird-like quirks, so you guys go well together’ The blonde thought to himself.

“But enough of why you weren’t there, tell us what happened with Y/N,” Sero added on.

“The hell? Why are you so invested in how I fucked her?” Bakugou said with attitude.

“Not that man,” Kirishima intervened, “we wanna know what happened after.”

“We also wanna know which desk you fucked on so we could avoid the cum splatter.” Kaminari said, earning a wack to the back of his head from Sero.

“Well I thought we were gonna make up and get back together,” Bakugou started and the trio of boys stared right at him as if he was going to open some buried treasure.

“But I guess she’s not ready for the relationship again. At least not yet. She said she wanted some time and then she’ll come back to me. All I gotta do is wait.” Bakugou said while getting comfortable in his spot on the common room couch.

“Says who?” Kaminari added.

“ ‘scuse me?” Bakugou asked.

“Who says all you gotta do is wait?” Bakugou looked at his idiotic friend.

“She did, Dunce Face.”

“Well you could wait for her, but if I was you, I’d still treat her like my girlfriend.” The electric blonde stated.

“Huh?” The entire group asked.

“Bakugou look. Give Y/N the time she wants, but you could still treat her like your girlfriend. It’ll remind her of the times you had and it’l-“

“I’m gonna stop you right there Kaminari.”

As the group turned towards the doorway, they saw Y/N. She seemed to have gotten back from some extra training considering she was still wearing gym attire and her duffel bag was still on her shoulder.

“Hey Y/N, just got back from the gym?” Kirishima kindly started up a conversation with the girl.

“Yeah. Had to take a shower there too to save some time. I’m heading back out to go on a late night patrol with Hawks after I drop off my bag, but I can spend 2 minutes to explain something to you, dorks.” You started walking towards the group, more specifically behind Bakugou’s seat.

“I’m gonna make this real simple. Katsuki and I don’t need a grand plan to get back together. We just need some time,” when you finally made it behind Bakugou, you gently wrapped your arms around Katsuki’s neck area, “besides, Suki knows I’ll always come back to him. He’s my one and only after all, right?” You said the last part while looking at Bakugou.

“Right.” Katsuki proudly replied.

You leaned in to give him a little hug from behind and pecked his cheek before walking off to your room.

Katsuki couldn’t help but smile and watch as you walked away. He knew you guys would end up back together. All he has to do is wait. But his moment was ruined by a certain dunce face.

“Damn dude, what the fuck kinda dick did you give her to get her to act like that with you?” He shockingly asked.

“SHUT UP!” Bakugou screamed as his two other friends laughed.

——————————————————————————

Ever since, Bakugou and You grew closer and closer. To others, it looked like exes who stuck to being friends. Best friends, if anything. Y’all played together as best friends, fought and bickered like best friends and looked out for each other and loved one another like best friends. But in reality, you and Bakugou were just falling for each other even more day after day. Yes, it was clear to you both that you were already in love with each other, but damn y’all didn’t know love could grow so strong.

Bakugou stuck to his word though. He was doing whatever it took to get you back, and yeah. Maybe he took a little bit of Kaminari’s advice and continued to treat you as his girlfriend. The only difference was that he didn’t and couldn’t claim you so it kinda hurt him but he was ok because he knows what’ll happen in the end.

So now we have this Bakugou who’s at your every beck and call, even when you don’t call. Thirsty in the middle of class? Bakugou’s got your favorite drink with him on standby. Craving something special? Bakugou will learn how to make it for you. Tired after a hard day’s work? The angry Pomeranian was there to carry you back to the dorms. What a simp.

——————————————————————————

*RIINNNGGGGGG*

And there goes the bell for class. As students walked into their respective rooms, the students of 1-A notice the two entering.

“And here comes Bakugou holding the door for his lady,” Kaminari spoke aloud.

“Hey man, they’re not dating, remember?” Sero reminded him.

“Yet. That’s the exciting part. 2 lovers, patiently waiting for each other. And Bakugou being so willing to drop everything just for Y/N, and Y/N willing to tussle through challenges for Bakugou. Ohh it’s so romantic!!” Mina said with a squeal and excitement.

“Bakubro really doesn’t want anyone else but her....they’re gonna get through this!” Kirishima hopefully said. “If they don’t I’ll beat his ass myself after all the shit I went through for this relationship. You know, THE RELATIONSHIP IM NOT EVEN IN!” He said loud enough for Bakugou to hear.

“Those idiots,” Bakugou growled. “CANT A GUY JUST SPEND SOME TIME WITH HIS GIRL WITHOUT SOME CRACKHEADS WHISPERING ABOUT US?!” He yelled at the group. But with that last comment, you raised your brow.

“So I’m your girl, huh?” You said with a sly demeanor.

This caused Katsuki to blush like crazy. “You know what I meant you little dumbass!”

“Yeah, I’m a dumbass. But apparently I’m your dumbass.” Your snide remarks were beginning to drive Katsuki crazy.

“Ok, that’s it!” With that, Bakugou grabbed your arm and dragged you away from the classroom before Mr. Aizawa came. As the 2 left the room, the boys of the Bakusquad knew exactly what was about to happen.

“Annnddd they’re they go. Off to a place of sweat and ecstasy.” Kaminari sighed.

Ever since that time in the classroom, you and Bakugou have had sneaky links here and there for the past few weeks. A little make out session in the kitchen, a little grinding in the common area, some receiving in many different places. However you were both cautious and made sure it never went beyond that. No vaginal penetration with a penis!

Though you both said you weren’t dating yet, it was obvious where you both would end up.

“What do you mean?” Mina asked.

“It’s nothing you have to worry about, just let them do them.” Kirishima explained.

Fortunately, only the Bakusquad boys were aware of these secret meetings. Once Bakugou told them of the classroom sex, they could tell whenever you two were interested in doing the deed with one another. They also steered clear from Bakugou’s desk. When they found out you both had gone to town on it, they made sure to never go near it unless they knew Bakugou cleaned it up thoroughly.

——————————————————————————

“Mm...Suki..” you breathed out in between the heated kiss.

Here we are in the storage closet. Y/N seated on top of a small standing shelf with Katsuki standing over her and his fist deep inside her.

Katsuki was in the process of marking your exposed breast and enjoying the feeling of your soft walls around his hand. He couldn’t help but speed up his movements.

“P-please....slow down-“ you were cut off by your own moan and cry of pleasure as his fist hit a sensitive area.

“Oh c’mon, you know you love it. You also know you shouldn’t have given all that sass. You knew exactly where it would lead ya,” he spoke as he continued to bite and suck at your nipples. “But I bet you wanted this, didn’t you. You little slut.”

His fist sped up even more and went deeper than before earning loud cries to leave your mouth.

“Ahh...fuck! Y-yes! I wanted this so bad...ohh shit Suki!” You cried out. You felt the coil in your stomach tighten and Katsuki knew what was coming right from the look on your face. He quickly pulled his fist out and dropped his head down to meet your glistening cunt, and continued to finish you off.

“Shit....you taste so sweet.” Katsuki couldnt help but eat you out as if you were his last meal. He groaned as your hands went to tug at his hair to push him in deeper. As he stuck his tongue out to enter inside you, your hips moved on their own and began to grind against his face.

“Yes...yess oh my god..just like that Suki please,”

Katsuki was desperate for more and so his hand went to your clit. He viciously rubbed at it until your legs began to shake.

“F-FUCK!... oh yess...ah!” You let out.

“Let me taste you....come inside my mouth like a good girl and let daddy taste you.” Katsuki demanded.

And you did just that. You released the white honey all on his tongue and Katsuki lapped at every drop, sucking you dry. As he finished his meal he kissed your cunt and continued to kiss you up your body from you stomach to your chest to your neck until he reached your lips. He gave you a passionate kiss, all tongue and love, and you could taste yourself. He was right. You were sweet.

——————————————————————————

During lunch, the Bakusquad, including Y/N, all ate together and had friendly conversations and arguments as usual.

“Man that steak hit the spot!” Kirishima exclaimed with a breath of satisfaction.

“I bet your already full too, huh Kacchan. Bet you already had your fill of Y/-“

*WHACK*

As the tray slowly slid off of Denki’s face after so rudely being thrown at him (curtousy of Sero) he was revealed to an angry Kacchan.

“Shut up dunce face!” Bakugou yelled.

“You’re one to talk Suki. If anyone should shut up, it should be the one with the booming voice.” You said as you ate your udon noodles.

“ME?!?” Bakugou exclaimed.

“Yes you ya dummy!” You retorted.

“You wanna go shitty woman?!?” Bakugou said while standing up now.

“Bring it on Blasty! I’ll take you on any day!” You replied while standing on top of your chair to beat his height.

‘Typical,’ the Bakusquad thought.

You guys would go from lovers to enemies in a split second with a besties vibe somewhere in between. The fun and teasing bickering went on like this for awhile and has been happening for awhile too. But at the end of the day, there was no real beef between you two of course. Just a mutual pining that involved some attitude.

“Man, you guys have so much energy. Cant you guys tone it down, we’re pretty sure you shouldn’t be so energized after you both just fu-“

*WHACK*

Sero was shut up with a tray (revenge from Denki) before he could finish his sentence and expose the soon to be lovers’s dirty secrets.

“I KNOW!” Mina popped up. “How about a beach day?” The pink alien girl suggested.

“Huh?” The entire group said while Y/N and Bakugou sat down again.

“A beach day! We all have pent up energy and some of us wanna relax so why not get everything out at the beach? Oou! And let’s go at night, it’ll be way cooler and so much more fun. Plus, that’s the best time for us to sneak out!” Pinkie explained.

“The hell do you mean sneak out dumbass? It’s a Friday, if we wanna go the beach, we can just go on Saturday, tomorrow.” Bakugou said.

“Jeez you moron, wheres the fun in that. Look this may seem a little wild since we’re hero trainees and all but how about we take a car to get to the beach?” Mina proposed.

“Mina, we’re under 18. We can’t drive.” Kirishima said.

“Legally. But Bakugou here knows how to drive! Remember that one time Mr. Aizawa made him pull the travel bus around the corner because he was too tired to bring it himself?” The alien girl reminded the group.

“Not only that, but Denki’s parents are outta town!” The girl added on.

“Oh yeah! We could totally take my Dad’s car! There’s definitely enough room in there!” Kaminari said.

The group was now starting to get excited. Except for one blonde of course.

“No way. Like you said Pinkie, we’re hero trainees. We can’t risk ruining ours or UA’s reputation just for some trip to the beach.” Bakugou said while downing his rice bowl.

“Aww c’mon man!”

“Whaaat but pleaseee!”

“Seriously dude?”

“Awwww :(“

The group all said in unison. But Bakugou wasn’t cracking. He wasn’t going to risk his career as a future pro just for a quick trip to some sand and sea.

That is until he felt a tugging on his sleeve. When he looked to his left he saw Y/N holding onto his sleeve with a pout and puppy dog eyes. His heart was about to blow.

“Please Suki?” You whined.

You basically embodied the “🥺” emoji. Bakugou had to turn away so he could deny your request.

“Mm mm” he said while staring out the window next to the table.

You let out a huff of frustration while looking towards your group of friends that were staring at you in desperation. You guys were going to get that beach day.

So you pulled onto Bakugou’s arm and pulled his side into your soft pillowy breast. You reached up and whispered into his ear to make sure no would could hear your next words. With a seductive voice, you spoke.

“Please daddy?”

——————————————————————————

And now here we are. The Bakusquad currently on a road trip to the beach at 9:45 p.m. Y/N riding shotgun, Mina and Kirishima in the seats behind you, Kaminari and Sero in the third row right infront of the trunk, and Bakugou behind the wheel. He was just thankful that there was almost nobody driving around here or else they would’ve noticed this young group of teens driving late at night. He was also very thankful that during lunch yesterday, nobody noticed his raging boner after Y/N whispered in his ear.

“Oh my gosh!! We’re almost there!” Mina squealed from behind.

Although it was almost 10, the weather was still really warm so it would be a fun night. Just the moon, the stars, the sand and sea, and your best friends. Perfection.

“Oh! Suki, you missed the turn for the shortcut.” You pointed out.

“No I didn’t dumbass, we’re taking another shortcut.” Bakugou replied.

“Umm, says who exactly?” You retorted.

“The one driving this damn car, now settle your fine ass down before I kiss you.” Bakubitch replied with.

“Ok, just because you add a little flirt and flare to your reply doesn’t mean your in the right.” You stated.

“Oh but I think it does.” Bakugou came back with.

“Oh! Okay Bakubitch, I don’t know who you think you’re getting smart with-“

“I know exactly who I’m getting smart with, teddy bear.” Katsuki said with a smirk on his face.

“.....Fight me. Fight me right now.” You deadpanned while obviously joking.

“I’ll beat your ass any day of the week you shitty woman-“

“Except you’ll LOSE Bakubitch.” You added.

“You wanna fight that bad, huh shitty woman?!” Bakugou now started yelling in a very Bakugou manner.

“I do! I really do Katsuki! Bring it on Explosion boy!” You said

As you and Bakugou started going at it with your words in the car, the squad was starting to get a little tired of this endless pining. JUST DATE EACH OTHER ALREADY. Mina finally snapped.

“OKAY YOU KNOW WHAT?.....I’m just gonna say it.” Mina started with.

‘Huh’ You looked behind you while Bakugou took glances from time to time in his mirror to see Mina as she spoke.

“Why don’t you cut the horse shit, and get to the part where you admit your feelings for each other?” She added on.

“WHAT?!”

“Excuse me?”

“Oh spare me, spare me, spare me!” Mina went on with. Then, Kirishima joined in.

“Yes yes Y/N, he’s a brute, I know-“

“Hey!” Bakugou interrupted but Kirishima just continued.

“He probably reminds you of a bad relationship and gosh you’d like a real nice man to settle down with,” he added on.

“But admit it! You’re real curious to know what he’s like in the sack nowadays!” Kaminari joined in.

“You idiots are dead meat,” Bakugou said.

“And you! HA!” Mina began to speak. “Well you’re just a big man baby who’d rather act tough then show his true feelings because the last time you opened your heart, you got hurt.....OWIE” Mina said in a baby voice.

“And now,” Sero began, “rather than admit these feelings, you’re dancing around one another with this mind numbing and frankly boorish mating ritual.”

Mina spoke once more.

“So PLEASE, for our sake, either quit your bickering, or PULL OVER, TEAR OFF THOSE CLOTHES, AND GET IT OVER WITH ALREADY!!!”

(Silence)

“Aye, I said what I said.” Mina concluded with her hands up at her side in defense.

As Bakugou and Y/N blushed ferociously, the squad behind them finally settled until Bakugou sped up, swerved the car and hit the brakes.....he was parking.

“Oh look, we’re here.” He said.

As he turned around to look at the group, he saw his friends all mixed up and thrown around the van.

“You guys good?” Y/N asked as she turned around in worry.

“Ugghhhhhh.” Her friends replied, clearly a little bruised.

“Alright then, let’s get going!” Y/N said with a sweet smile and exited the car.

——————————————————————————

After everyone had changed into their swim suits, everyone began setting up. The girls stayed behind with Denki to help set up the towels and seats and bring out the coolers, food, and tables. Bakugou, Kirishima, and Sero went out to collect firewood for the bond fire they were gonna make.

As you looked around the beach, you were glad that nobody was around. You guys could be as loud as you wanted, do what you wanted, and just have an awesome night. And the fact that this was a wild beach meant that there was so much more to do. You guys could go cliff diving, mountain climbing, or forest roaming. No lifeguards to stop you.

As the guys came back with fire wood, Mina and Denki pulled out the cooler.

“Hey guys~, guess what we have!” Mina said.

The group watched as Denki pulled out various beers, wine coolers, and a bottle of Hennessy and shot cups.

“Alcohol?” Kirishima asked, “where’d you guys get that.”

“We grabbed it outta my garage fridge. My family likes to turn up a lot so we also got some spares hanging around,” Kaminari explained.

You guys weren’t first time drinkers. You were high schoolers and you’ve been to parties so of course you guys have already had your first taste of alcohol. Hell, even Bakugou had some before. What can he say, he couldn’t help himself after he saw his friends seem to be enjoying themselves a little too much after getting drunk the first time.

As you started the fire with your quirk, everyone else began to get comfy near the blazing flame. Denki was the last to sit since he went to grab his acoustic guitar to play some tunes. When he finally sat down he began to sing a song.

“Let’s sit around the campfire and sing our campfire song! Our C-A-M-P—“

“NO!” The group all yelled.

“Oh alright!” The electric blonde huffed.

The group all laughed and Kaminari then began to play a chill melody on the instrument. The group was happy, laughing, enjoying themselves and having so much fun...well one of them did have something on their mind but nonetheless still enjoying themselves.

Faces were being stuffed with delicious food, alcohol was being passed around, rounds of shots were being downed like water, and everyone was having a good time. A little game of truth or dare started up and ended after Kaminari and Kirishima both threw up in separate bushes after being dared to kiss each other by Mina.

“Never again,” Kaminari said.

“Yeah I’m good with never having to get kisses from my bro again.” Kirishima sighed.

“Oh whatever you big wussies. It was a fun game while it lasted.”

Everyone laughed in agreement.

“Alright well,” Sero spoke, “we all came to the beach, why don’t we get to the main event. I’m gonna go for swim, you guys in?”

As everyone agreed they all started walking to the water. Well except for two people. As Y/N was walking to the shoreline, a hand stopped her as it grabbed onto her arm.

“You idiots go, me and Y/N are gonna join you later.” Bakugou said to the group and they all said their ok’s and went in. “You, come with me.”

As you and Bakugou walked back to the car, he asked you a question.

“So..you’re not drunk are you?” He asked precautiously.

“Just a little tipsy but I’m still in control. Still aware of everything, so no. I’m not drunk.” You answered.

“Ok cool.” He said as he got into the driver’s seat. Once you finally got in and buckled up, he drove off. In the middle of the drive, you asked him a question this time.

“Hey Suki? Where are we going?”

“I found a special place while I was looking for wood. I wanna show you.” He simply stated.

As he continued to drive off to wherever you rested your hand on the center between you and Bakugou and let your face sit in your right palm as you stared out the window. The songs playing throughout the car gave it a loving and chill vibe. You enjoyed the comfortable silence.

As you continued to stare off, you felt Bakugou’s hand intertwine with yours. You looked back and saw he was blushing while holding onto the steering wheel and staring at the road. Man, he was so hot. In nothing but his swimming trunks as he leaned into his chair and drove off. His defined abs and chiseled chest was definitely eye candy. His giant veiny hand gripped the wheel and his jaw was so sharp as he turned and looked around for other drivers. Yeah, Bakugou was definitely one of those people that looked attractive as hell when they began to drive. You looked down at your hands and squeezed his. You were really enjoying this car ride.

When the car came to a stop, you finally noticed how you were in the middle of the forest.

“Where are we Suki?” You asked him.

As he grabbed your hand he spoke, “just follow me teddy bear.”

You guys walked for what felt like a good thirty minutes until you came across.....a cave?

“I know it doesn’t seem like much but wait until you see the inside.” Bakugou said. As you walked in, you finally realized where he took you. A gorgeous crystal cave. Its colors were shining and its gems were sparkling. All the walls were covered except for the top where there seemed to be an opening. It was letting all the moonlight enter the cave causing the crystals to sparkle even more, including the giant pool of water at the center of the cave.

“Suki it’s beautiful,” you said in awe.

“Yeah, knew you’d like it,” He began.

You both sat down at the edge of the pool just dipping your legs in and enjoying each other’s company.

“Y/N.” Bakugou said.

“What’s up Suki?” You asked.

“I can’t help but keep thinking back to what Mina and the others said in the car.” He admitted.

“What? About pulling over and tearing off each other’s clothes?” You chuckled.

“No. About our feelings for each other.” Bakugou said as he just stared at the pool.

“Oh. That.” You calmly said with a hidden smile and soft blush.

Bakugou grabbed onto your hand before speaking again.

“Y/N I really, really, really, really, really love you....a lot. And I’m so sorry for everything I said and did,” Bakugou started.

“Suki....” you softly said while looking at him. You noticed he was staring down at your arm where your now tiny burn mark was. A scar that won’t be forgotten and a memory that was permanently burned into your skin. Literally.

You saw how Bakugou cringed at the sight of it.

“I am so, so sorry for everything. I don’t even know what I could say that could even make up for what I did. Every night memories of what happened keep coming back to me and I’m still in complete shock that I could even do that. To you of all people! The love of my life....I’m just really glad that you said you’d come back to me and that you gave me another chance to get close with you again. I know I said I would wait for you for as long as it takes but I don’t wanna wait anymor-“ Bakugou was cut off as you raised his head to give him a deep kiss. As he kissed you back, Bakugou put everything he couldn’t say as words into that kiss, hoping you’d understand.

When you finally pulled away, you leaned your forehead onto his while staring into his ruby eyes.

“I don’t want to wait anymore either, Suki.”

With that, Bakugou gave you the biggest smile you’ve ever seen. He pulled you in for another kiss and a tight hug.

“So....you’re mine again?” He asked.

“I was always yours Suki. You’re my one and only after all, right?” You teased.

“Right.” He proudly stated. Katsuki Bakugou finally got his girl back. He finally got his love of his life and his teddy bear. His world felt like it came back together again and he no longer felt lost.

After you both spent more time in the cave, exploring, finding all the gems, and enjoying your renewed and fixed love, you and Bakugou found yourselves back in the same spots you were sitting in when you first arrived.

With his eyes closed, chin resting on your head, and an arm wrapped around your waist, with you cuddled into his side and leaned onto his chest, you had a realization.

“Oh hey, Suki.” You said.

“What’s up teddy bear?” He asked with his eyes still closed.

“We never got to go swimming” you said with a pout.

As he opened one eye to look at you, he noticed your adorable pout and the simp in him came out along side with the devil.

“Alright then princess, let’s go for a swim. We have this crystal pool all to ourselves so why not?”

As you gleamed with excitement, you excitingly got up to jump into the water but before you could, Katsuki stopped you.

“Not so fast princess. Our little game of touch and tease is over now since your mine again. I wanna make up for lost time,” he said with a smirk.

“So you’re saying...?” Y/N asked confused.

“We’re going skinny dipping.”

At first it shocked you but then again, this is Katsuki we’re talking about. So you played his little game.

“Maybe your game of touch and tease is over but mine is still running.” You said with a smirk as you walk towards him. You placed your hand on his toned abs as you began speaking again.

“You wanna go skinny dipping Katsuki?” You then slowly went up to whisper in his ear.

“Then let’s get in daddy.”

As you walked away from him you started to undress yourself in a seductive manner. You started with your bikini top, pulled on the string to untie it and tossed it to the side. As you stepped to the pools edge, you did the same to your bikini bottoms and looked over at Katsuki. You didn’t fully face him as you spoke, but as you were holding up your chest pretending to cover yourself up, you showed just enough cleavage to get him riled up.

“You coming or not?” You teasingly asked before you stepped into the water letting its surprisingly warm temperature surrounded you. You had an idea and used your quirk to turn the pool into a hot spring. As the steam surrounded you, a blush from the heat began to show on your face and Bakugou couldnt hide his hard on inside his thin trunks. He undressed himself and entered the now spring.

A/N: YALL I DIDNT REALIZE HOW LONG THIS WAS SO THERE WILL BE A PART 4 COMING OUT RIGHT AFTER THIS ONE. I LITERALLY CANT TYPE ANY MORE SO STAY TUNED!!!

[jadeender]

A Desperate Act

As Warriors scarf hit the blood soaked ground Hyrule knew he had to do something, anything, if he didn’t Warriors would end up exactly like him trapped inside his own body with no way out.

“I’m sorry Warriors.” Hyrule whispered as he summoned what strength he could.

“What are you…..?” Callous began before Hyrule stuck forth with incredible speed casting a single spell, thunder.

A bolt of lightning shot from the sky hitting Conqueror dead on causing the man to fall to his knees before passing out completely.

Callous turned on him rapidly. “What the hell did you do? How did you do that? You shouldn’t have that much freedom.”

Hyrule’s attention was still on trying to watch what was happening with the others but a crimson haze was falling over their vision as Callous’s anger grew. Hyrule glimpsed the other running to Warriors to make sure he was ok before his vision was obscured completely.

“I should have felt it. Should have known you were getting a little control after the last time, but it won’t slip my mind again. Tonight we’re going to have some fun.” Callous promised.

____________________________________________________________________________

Wild ran towards Warriors in fear, he hadn’t used Urbosa’s Fury and neither had Noble, who else knew how to use lightning he wondered his mind racing. When they reached Warriors the man was out cold, his clothes signed from the lightning, his breathing was erratic but there.

“We need to get him somewhere safe.” Wild yelled to the others, with Warriors out and Time still unfit to lead them it Wild felt something he didn’t even know he had take over as he started belting out orders.

“Pick him up we need to get out of here fast.” He commanded and Twilight and Legend moved forward to oblige. Looking ahead he could see towns people gathering at the gates their faces horrified at the act they had just seen.

The two hefted Warriors up so Twilight could carry him piggy back style.

“Wait.” Came a single comanding word. A lone woman strode from the gates but her entrance was nothing like that of Veran’s. This woman commanded respect with each footstep and the citizens moved away as she progressed. She was dressed for battle wearing a dress like outfit that showed of pants underneath for mobility and sensible boots.

“Princess Zelda.” Time said before dropping into a bow and the others following suit somewhat awkwardly except for Twilight.

She continued on until she stopped before the group, a rapier strapped at her waist. Zelda eyes Warriors on Twilights back and spoke “Explain.”

Wild stood and as quickly as possible he began “Warriors was being possessed by a dark shadow of himself he wasn’t in control of his actions…”

Zelda cut him off after a moment. “The shadow are back, I’ve fought their kind before. Bring him into the city, straight to the castle, no detours.”

She spun around and began marching towards the castle her braided hair swaying in the wind. They didn’t hesitate to follow her back towards the castle, all of them knowing not to mess with Zelda.

With the question of where to go solved Wild’s mind drifted back to wondering where those leadership instincts had come from but he brushed that aside for now. For now he needed to know who had stuck Warriors.

“Do any of the other darks make lightning?” Wild asked Noble hoping the dark would be cooperative despite his usual disliking of Wild.

“Not that I know of, but we aren’t exactly the feelings and secret sharing types.” Noble replied. Which while it wasnt rather helpful, Noble did actually answer the question which was a welcome change from being ignored or insulted.

Who did that leave that knew big magic out of the links? Wild ran through the list until he stopped at one hero, one who always seemed to rely greatly on magic. Wild stole a glance at Hyrule and found the man walking not ashamedly like the others but holding himself and trying to appear as neutral though he was dramatically failing.

Wild may not have been the most experienced or smartest Link but he had picked up some researcher esque skills from his Zelda. Right now Hyrule was the most likely suspect. As they made their way into the castle Wild kept an eye on the other hero trying not to be very obvious.

Warriors’s Zelda led them to Warriors room in the castle, a rather nice place near her own room. Twilight laid Warriors into his bed and they all waited from Zelda to talk. Once she was inside she deflated slightly and took a breath.

“Is he ok?” Zelda looked at Warriors worridely.

“He’ll be fine.” Time said. “However the um shadow isn’t gone. We need to get him out of here soon, we can’t stay.”

Zelda looked back at Time. “How did this happen? The shades could never do anyting like this before.”

Wild stepped forward slightly. “What exactly did you mean when you said you’d fought shades before?”

Zelda sat down on the end of Warriors bed sighing. “When we were fighting Cia she was able to copies of Link, myself, and even our other allies, they had dark forms and glowing red eyes but they were never able to do anything like this.”

“Shadow clones.” Noble noted.

“What are those?” Wild asked back. Noble huffed but answered.

“Weak imitations created by magic, nothing like us real darks. They’re just mindless servants.” Noble answered scoffing at the idea that he could ever be compared to such weak creatures. Wild thought back to the massacre outside the castle, Conqueror had created several copies of himself, perhaps that's what shadow clones were.

As Wild returned his attention to the conversation Hyrule of all people was explaining the same thing he had just heard to Warrior’s Zelda. Wild filled away another note of suspicion before glancing back at Zelda. Her face remained strong though she did appear somewhat worried.

“Will Link be ok?” Zelda asked.

“With any luck he’ll be back in control and just fine.” Time answered with false hope. “But as soon as he wakes up we need to leave.”

Sky who had been examining Warriors nodded. “We won’t be waking up for hours probably. We should stay the night.”

Time nodded in agreement.

Zelda stood. “I’ll have rooms prepared for you, and you look as though you could use a bath and a good meal.”

Time shook his head. “If it’s allowed we would rather stay here with Warriors.”

If Zelda was confused by the nickname she didn’t show it. “Of course, I don't know how you all know my Link but it’s good that he has you. I’ll have cots and food sent it as soon as I can.”

With that she left and they all relaxed a little shutting the door behind her.

“What now?” Wind asked. “Are we really going to stay the night.”

Time nodded his head, trying to get back into the swing of being leader. “Its better this way, it’s already late and staying here is safer than venturing into an unknown land with a hurt companion and no direction. Try and relax a little while we wait.”

Time took a seat on one of the couches near the balcony and removed his armor the black tunic underneath once again becoming apparent. The others followed suit setting aside their things and sitting around to wait. Four, whom had reformed sometime during the massacre, took up a position sitting near Legend who once again was sitting there examining his mirror, like he had often done since Acidic had….. been lost.

Twilight sat by himself, while Sky was sitting on the end of Warriors bed watching the wounded hero. Sky pulled out his mirror for a moment and Wild caught a glimpse of the back two triforce symbols adorned it. An upside down triforce etched in red rested over top a normal triforce etched in gold. The points almost touching.

Sky checked the mirror before quickly putting away. That confirmed Wild’s suspicion for sure, all of the mirrors had symbols on them. One or two could have been a coincidence but three is a pattern.

Wild watches the others carefully to see if any of them would pull out their mirrors and none did.

Settling into a chair in the corner Wild pulled out their mirror and looked into the glass. After a moment his reflection changed and morphed into that of Noble. Wild raised an eyebrow but did say his surprise out loud, a lifetime of training and stress had suppressed that reaction.

"Do you want to talk?" Noble asked his voice tired.

"You knew you could do this?" Wild questioned thinking back to the dark rather than voicing his thoughts.

"It's what the mirrors do, they allow us to watch our lights. And I suppose in your hands it allows you to watch us." Noble mussed as he messed with his hair, slowly unbraiding and braiding it combing with his fingers for lack of an actual comb.

Wild looked at the others wondering if any of the others knew, resting his eyes on Legend Wild got the idea that he must as Legend continued to stare into his mirror.

A knock at the door surprised all of them less than an hour later as servants came is bearing cots and a more food then they'd seen in months, by the time the servants were done they'd brought in an entire feast.

As they ate Wild watched his companions a practice he did commonly, once again the chat was non existent the weight of what Warriors and Conqueror had done weighed on all of them.

Once they finished eating Time stood. "We may be safe in the castle but after what happened today we are not safe from the people. We will be hunted by angry family members and vengeful spouses after what they did. We leave at first light whether Warriors wakes up on not."

No one bothered to argue because they all knew it was true, after the massacre that took place they'd be lucky to leave the city without a mob on their hands.

______________________________________

When night feel Callous finally submitted to sleep, an act he didn't do commonly because it made you weak and vulnerable to attack. But tonight was different, tonight he had work to do. When lights were asleep it left a certain opportunity to….. talk.

Callous entered the realm of Hyrule's dreams with ease, practice and training paying off.

As usual Hyrule was dreaming of a maze like ones he spent much of his time in during his quest. Callous watched as his light tried to navigate the maze, without light nor sword. Laughing lightly Callous watched the light run into a wall before turning and continuing on. Hyrule was persistent that's for sure. But all things break with time.

Using his influence Callous caused the dream to shift and suddenly Hyrule found himself strapped into a chair in a dark room.

"Callous?" The light called out questioning.

Without flourish or show Callous appeared from the shadows in front of his light.

"Hello Hyrule. You did something very bad today, and I promised we'd have some fun. Or a least I will." Callous let out a cruel laugh and summoned a knife into his hand. With one had he yanked Hyrules bad quickly so that it slammed into the back of the chair.

Positioning the knife over Hyrules exposed face he said "Let's have some fun."

[sweetlifetownsville]

Hard Going Getting On Top Of The Hill: The Mayor's Magnificent Mount Louisa Make-Over Might Stumble At The First Jump

And Jenny knows about the problem, but is blithely telling us its all go, when it may well be all stop. The Pie shares a most interesting email. The old bird can reveal that Mayor Jenny Hill IS under investigation by Brisbane authorities for possible misconduct and watching all the fumbling inanities coming over the next 12 months in the run-up to local council elections is going to be more fun than watching a blind man trying to get out of a door knob factory. To that end, The Pie this week introduces a new occasional award, The Codswallop Cup. No shortage of contenders. Also, our new white ele sorry, stadium, has hit more turbulence as it rises from the mud and Lozza Lancini will not be a happy chappy. Bentley has a say on George Pells new lifestyle And our regular gallery from Trumpistan. First, Hot Of The Rumour Mill

The most interesting rumour has just floated into the Nest. Its unverified (well duh, thats why its called a rumour) so well have to wait until the Astonisher plays catchup sometime this week. The Pie hears that the only two tenderers for the new stadiums ultra-lucrative catering contract , one being the incumbent Spotless and one being the Cowboys Leagues Club, have both been excluded for non compliant tenders to do with not paying award wages. So back to square one for the new stadium and where does that leave Spotless in the current stadium? For the answer, check the Astonisher around oh, say, next Friday, by when Lozza Lancini will have told iditor Jenna Cairney what she can say about this. Pell Mell Nothing has been quite as spectacular in the annals of fallen high flyers than that of George Pell, who has swapped his glittering Mardi Gras cardinals robes for prison drab, after being sent to chokey for six years (to serve 3 years and 8 months before eligible for parole) for what only be described as the most brazen, power-deluded child abuse imaginable. Indeed so brazen as to leave lingering doubts among some observers whether such things couldve happened as described, but an appeal will sort that out, after all, the jury knows things that we do not. Now Georgy Boy faces another biased jury his fellow inmates, a class of folk not known for their strict adherence to jurisprudence rules and who exercise their own summary justice according to their own morals and mythology. And Bentley reckons you never know who youre going to bump in in the Yard.

And The Pie says to those who say the term is not enough, rest assured, for a man of Pells pomposity, ego and age, he has been handed a life sentence of one sort or another. One imagines there is one person who will give Judge Peter Kidd the thumbs up.

Shifty Business Delivering on promises is a tricky business, especially when our mayor is in campaign mode. Today, we were offered this little bit of click bait.

But when we went through to the story, what we got was this

Uncanny how this is so ambiguous, like the Castle Hill upgrade itself. Now this is media sleight of hand at its clumsiest, making a highly speculative project sound like solid fact. Interesting because it simply that the TCC will start drawing up plans for what it would like to see at Mt Louisa and crucially for mayor Mullet is the quote: with construction expected by the end of the year. Community engagement started this week and will continue until the end of April. The Pie thought, well thats a nice idea, if conveniently timed to become a re-election boast, but hey, good for the huffnpuff crowd. Then this morning, (Sat) an email fluttered into the Nest. From Angela Sacilotto Councillor Jenny Hills grand plan for Mt Louisa is another political stunt with council elections due in March 2020. TCC do not own all of Mt Louisa. I own a 8 ha block right across the middle of the hill. I have told TCC I do not want to sell. Havent been able to verify Ms Sacilottos information, but she volunteered her contact details and phone number if The Pie wanted a chat about the matter (which for reasons well known to regular readers, is not a viable option since the recent operation.) But The Pie would guess there will be whole lot more to the meaning of community engagement when Mayor Mullet reads this. it is known that Jenny Hill does not like being crossed by people with legal rights who stand in the way of her grand visions, so this community engagement with Ms Sacilotto could involve nipple clamps, a car battery and wet towels . But That May Be The Least Of Her Problems Cant reveal too much at the moment, but our mayor is being officially investigated possible misconduct over her Adani links, particularly arising out of her trip to India. This will not be a revelation on her, because she has been informed of the issue by the Brisbane based investigating body, and what is officially termed overt inquiries are underway. Perhaps no biggy (but then again ) but not a great look for someone who once expressed her admiration for Ipswich Mayor Pisasale. What Dreams May Come, As Willy Shakespeare Once Said All this has led to The Magpie being told that Jenny, a Hitchcock fan, recently watched his classic The Birds, but when she went to bed, she had an horrific dream.

Serves her right for throwing darts at a much loved and protected Australian species. THIS WEEKS CONTENDERS FOR THE CODSWALLOP CUP Its a crowded field. Cmon, Really? Cmon now, seriously Jenna Cairney? Is this all youve got?

Listen, me dear old haggis-head, getting shocked by a menu may apply to a Korean doggy delicacy, a Vietnamese cockroach kebab or the price of a pie at the footy, but because this mob is adding burgers bloody good old Aussie burgers we Aussie snowflakes should be shocked? Do you not understand how insulting this advertorial pap is? One seriously has to question whether the decision makers who publish this clap trap have an IQ above room temperature. A Group Effort Where to start with this one, the inanity is of such magnitude that The Pie is tempted to inaugurate the Clusterfuck Cup as a separate category.

This mind-blowing little corker of an idea is called the Palmer Street Precinct Activation project, and involves wait for it a bit of new lighting along the street, and a new sign saying hang on again Palmer Street.

The plan was obviously to give re-election hopefuls a bit of sorely needed publicity (youd think on recent photographic evidence, Messagebank Walker and Ann-Maree Greaney are going steady). But for other reasons, the story raised both an eyebrow and a guffaw at the same time. Chef/restaurateur Matt Merrin, normally a sensible and successful man, made a right goof of himself when he (reportedly) told the paper the changes would transform Palmer Street into a world class destination. It will be something that visitors to Townsville can Instagram, take photos of and sell the message to the world. Its going to bring new investment back to Palmer Street (question: how does new investment come back?) Weve had many restaurants close over the last 12 months, this will inspire new restaurant owners and people to come back into Palmer Street and be part of the precinct it once was. A world class destination? Matt, a message from The Magpie, mate lay off the cooking sherry and exotic herbs before talking to the Astonisher (FFS, mate, youre even holding your glass crooked.) The story also informs us The dining strip received some upgrades during the preparations for the Commonwealth Games last year. Oh did it? Very similar upgrades in scale to the ones now proposed , as The Pie remembers. So in the year since that spruce up, two Palmer Street nose-baggeries have gone belly-up. But somehow, this one is going to usher in a new era? Hows that? But heres the best bit in the original story, Ann-Maree Greaney said the lighting would keep people, particularly women, safer that apparent admission that the council has allowed Palmer Street to operate without adequately safe lighting for years has now been removed from the story. What fucking planet are you from, you lot? Reporter Chris Lees, have you no dignity? Or sober judgement? Did TCC media gopfer Simpo Templeton have anything to do with this, its about his speed? Well, anyway Anthony, unlike the when at the Astonisher, at least in your TCC role you dont have to put your name to your cock-ups. 3. Off The Rails Then on Thursday, we had this little bit of fluffy irrelevancy.

But no sooner had this flimsy kite taken to the sky, than the Astonisher itself cut the string on Friday with this:

What city rail plan? There wasnt any, the original story was a campaigning thought-fart from the desperate Clr Jacob. Clever though, isnt it write bullshit one day and call it out as bullshit the next. Gotta luv the ol Astonisher. A Miscellaneous Magpie Whinge The Magpie is deliberately not talking about or seeking comment on the massacre in New Zealand, he has no words, certainly none that would contribute positively to this dark deed of pure evil. But coverage does prompt The Pie to vent about a favourite piece of nanny state demeaning idiocy can we please move away from the rubber-faced sign language person standing next to officials who are often making statements about deeply disturbing matters. Often signing involves grotesque and to the uninitiated completely inappropriate comical facial expressions. This presents the twin problems of distraction for the general audience and indignity for the subject of the media conference.The Pie doesnt know what the average deaf audience would be at any given time not many one would guess and yes, there are times like bushfire and flood updates where this information should be conveyed in this manner. But shit folks, heres a newsflash for more 60 years now, real time lower screen captioning has been available, or as all sports directors so slickly employ technology for a smaller, less distracting vision box to one corner. To currently give such a minority a so distracting and undignified presence is not necessary and lacks dignity, and disturbs concentration on what can be vital messages. Of course, nanny staters wont agree. Speaking Of The Nanny State Our evolving language, not always for the better, now features the term woke, as in are you woke to climate change? or any number of other social issues. It means are you alert to, but as so often happens, we too readily adopt the argot of the ill-educated as some sort expression of being cool and identifying with a group one wouldnt normally break bread with. The lovely thing about this nonsensical use of substitute language leaves it wide open for hysterically funny skewering and in this classic piss take Are You Woke? from a fed up Tracey Ullman. The Clock Is A-Ticking The Brexit imbroglio is increasingly hard to follow (or for The Pie, to care much about) but one of the cleverest pictorial comments the predicament of Theresa (dis)May(ed) comes from the Guardians Steve Bell.

And More Of The Same From Trumpistan A lot of attention continues to surround the tumble of democrats eager to take on President Trumpet at the polls next year. And the interest has been heightened by someone not running.

. The ducking, weaving and hilarity of the comments section runs 24/7, so give us of your best, folks. And if you like the blog, you can show your appreciation with some sorely needed financial support, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/hard-going-getting-on-top-of-the-hill-the-mayors-magnificent-mount-louisa-make-over-might-stumble-at-the-first-jump/

[dropofthoughts-blog]

The Group-mates ( 13/11 )

(I will not be using the actual names of the people in my rant )

My course in college is Event Management, i took this course cause family and friends see that i have the skill to handle events and whatnot. But most of this course requires group projects more than solo projects. Now, im not really a social butterfly nor a peoples person, although i do try to converse with them. I am 1/3 of the ethnic minorities in the class, the other 2 being Nepali. One of them, let’s call her Nicki, is my tutorial group while the other one isnt.

My first project was my Western Art presentation. i grouped up with someone i’ve met last year during my foundation course and his friend. Nicki and I would just call them “ the couples “ because they’re always together, they treat each other how a couple would but they have their own partner. Sketch. They were really nice to me, so they agreed to be my friends, since Nicki and i werent too close at the beginning of the school term and also i was pretty lonely in school. 

After several projects, and switching of groups later, i’m having my 2nd IEM ( Intro to Event Management ) presentation. Mind you, i’m never up to date with the tutors because i almost never go to my IEM prof’s lectures ( i’ll get to that in another rant in the future ;) ) I’m left alone. But theres this guy, we’ll call him Davis ( He’s important later ). Davis invited me to join his group so i did. By that time, we’d only have 3 days to prepare. He did most of the powerpoint slides and i made him a script. Normally, i’d stick to a cue card and write bullet points on them but i guess local chinese students prefer having a script on hand.

A week or so later, we have another project. It’s a video project for IPS ( Interpersonal Skills ). Originally it was only Nicki and I. But because “unfortunately” Davis didnt have a group, so his friend asked us, and we agreed. The next day, i sat next to Nicki and one of her groupmate, lets call her Suzie. She asked me how working with Davis was, and so i told her he was okay. She continued to tell me that he was a free loader because he didnt show up for their WA presentation and that he would keep ditching us last minute because he would always skip group meetings. So far, he skipped out once for our IPS video. What annoyed me is that he keeps mentioning that his friend studies Creative Media so he is taught how to shoot videos, angles, lighting, editing, whatnot. So Nicki and I just went whatever with it. Until it really pissed us off telling us that his friend wasnt free whenever we were, his friend is really unnecessary... But ugh anyway. We decided to shoot the damn video tomorrow so i can edit it. To Davis’ friend, i’m not that sorry that we dont need you because we’re not in the same course, nor do i doubt that we’re in the same school so please leave us alone. You will not be doing our project. lmao.

ANOTHER project is our final IEM presentation. I’m still in the chat group for the couples and their friends. Theres a special girl, we’ll call her Josie. I was in their group in the last presentation, and they were awful, not the couples but their friends. Josie PMed me letting me know that she linked me to the powerpoint on the google drive, so i told her that i’d check it out in a few. She screenshot our conversation to the group i was in and wrote in Cantonese about me finally replying or finally being useful or something. i replied the group with a straight “ lol. “ she proceeded to reply with the laugh-cry emoji several times then PMed me that she didnt mean to do that. wtf haha. Today, one of The Couples messaged me asking if i was gonna join their group or join Nicki’s group instead, i asked Nicki and talked to her about it and messaged my professor requesting to switch groups. he sent me a question mark because i didnt reply so i replied him telling him i was asking Nicki. He was still online BUT he messaged the group saying how i just left him on read. The group decided to talk shit about me how they keep forgetting i was in the group, saying how i dont do anything in the group. Moments later, they delete their messages. So im really hoping to be in Nicki’s group instead of Josie’s. I’m so angry with them its so stupid. 

School never lets me forget how much i hate everyone and group projects.

Goodnight, hope you guys had a good read. 

Until the next drop of thought!

[apsbicepstraining]

Richie Porte and Geraint Thomas crash out of Tour as Froome preserves yellow-bellied

Geraint Thomas and Richie Porte are out of the Tour de France after crashing on stage nine, with Thomas maintaining a believed separate collarbone, but Chris Froome still leads

Chris Froome will razz the rest of the Tour de France without his first lieutenant, Geraint Thomas, and close friend and principal competitor, Richie Porte, after the Welshman and Australian were forced to quit the hasten following slick swoops which diverted the ninth stage into a chaotic demolition derby from Nantua to Chambry. Froome held the yellow t-shirt after the stage was triumphed by the Colombian Rigoberto Urn.

The dates official medical report rostered 11 fallers with a range of classic clang traumata: a shoulder disorganization and punctured lung for Manuele Mori, a shattered vertebra for Robert Gesink, a dislocated kneecap for Jess Herrada, who was announced as having abandoned but finished the stage. The 2016 King of the Mountains, Rafal Majka, was blamed for the Thomas crash and purposed up with deep abrasions to both knees and elbows.

Thomas said: Everyone was nervous, everyone wanted to be at the figurehead and a few people were duelling to get between myself, Froomey and the rest of the boys. I let[ Rafal] Majka in and then he came down right in front of me on a straight chip of road. I had nowhere to go, gone over the top of him, and territory on my collarbone.

Team physician Jimmy[ Juan Mercadel] told you he thought it was broken but I got back on the motorcycle and carried on down the descent, but when I got on the flat I knew something was wrong. Then the race doctor said exactly the same so I intent up stopping then, travelled for a scan, and its broken.

Thomas, who was lying second overall behind his squad chairman Froome, had won stagecoach one in Dsseldorf and wore the hasten captains yellow t-shirt until the first tough hilltop finish at La Planche des Belles Filles last-place Wednesday. He had already lived three minor disintegrates in the Tours opening eight periods but his fourth, on the drop-off from the first hors catgorie ascent of the Tour, the Col de la Biche, 70 km into the stage, left him lying in the gutter, before he was sent to hospital. He was thrust out of the Giro dItalia this year after a mass pile-up caused by a motorbike.

G has interrupted his collarbone for sure, which is destroying for him, said Team Skys general manager, Sir Dave Brailsford. He had the clang in the Giro, then the rollercoaster of “re coming” and being in yellow after triumphing the earliest stages, and then separating his collarbone today.

Well get our arms around him and make sure hes all right. Well get him back on track but thats not nice to see.

Porte fell about 95 km later as the elite group of race favourites around Froome were flying down from the final ascent of the working day, the Mont du Chat, high above the town of Aix-les-Bains. The BMC leader was passing at more than 45 mph when his front wheel descended off the left-hand surface of a sinuous stretching of superhighway, he lost dominance and ricochetted off the rock face on the other side. As he did so he was hit by the Irishman Daniel Martin, who was able to select himself up after a high-speed somersault over Porte but who then fell again immediately prior to finishing ninth.

I dont think anyone want to get take risks there, but it was so slick for the purposes of the trees, said Martin. Richie locked up his back wheel, travelled straight into the grass, just wiped out, and his bicycle exactly collected me. Earlier, Martin was within an superstar of being created down in Thomass crash. He lent: I was very lucky the first time. Geraint went down and his motorcycle smacked my handlebars. I got through but my luck run out.

The Porte spill was followed by a second one, in which Martin was given a replacement wheel, merely to find it did not mesh with his restraints. I got a spare rotation off[ the neutral] Mavic[ busines auto] but I didnt have any dampers. I couldnt stop and became straight-shooting on. The second one wasnt really much. I just got a spare bike off the team car and got starting again.

Urn had problems of his own as one of the two fallers bicycles reached his rear derailleur a glancing jolt, drawing it impossible for him to change gear.

Porte lay still on the road, was placed on a person board and sent to hospital in the race ambulance. The official hasten doctor Florence Pommery, who had inclined him by the roadside, said his injuries did not appear to be serious. Id say there was more suspicion than harm. He was perfectly self-conscious, was pronouncing ordinarily and could recollect everything about the disintegrate. The official medical report said he had a blow to the pate,( without self-evident concussion) and bruising to his pelvis; X-ray solutions were awaited.

BMC team doctor Max Testa later said Porte had suffered a cracked collarbone and a fractured pelvis.

Normally, a fractured clavicle and pelvis would require four to six weeks retrieval, providing there are no complications, Testa said. If everything be applicable to project, Richie could be back on the motorcycle at the opening up of August and gradually build his fitness up from there.

BMC sports administrator Fabio Baldato said Porte had a lot of suffering but had remained conscious after the crash.

For Thomas this was the latest in a series of major clangs in the past three years. The Welsh double Olympic gold medallist finished the Tour in 2013 with a broken pelvis crashed out of Paris-Nice in 2014, when second overall, and was thrust out of this years Giro dItaliaafter a mass pile-up caused by a motorbike. He has hit a tree in Tirreno-Adriatico, a telegraph pole at Gap in the 2015 Tour, fell spectacularly in the 2015 Paris-Roubaix, and witnessed his likelihoods in last years Olympic road race smashed by a nasty fell off the final descent.

Froomes hand strengthens as he improves title momentum

Chris Froome moved out of his press conference after the stage in irritation after the same journalist asked him an issue that had already been raised regarding an seeming falling out with Fabio Aru, but the yellow jersey owner had every right to be on edge. He was far from the only one, after a daytime of utter chaos with nerves, humours, t-shirts, surfaces, and riches all frayed by the end.

Froome arrived in Chambry with his the opportunities of taking a fourth Tour strengthened after a tumultuous 181 kilometres through the Jura, which enabled him to pull away from key rivals such as Nairo Quintana, Alberto Contador and Richie Porte, the latter in extremely unfortunate circumstances.

Froome even managed to increase his overall precede by four seconds thanks a day bonus for third place at the finish, where the only overall contenders to finish on his ends were Romain Bardet who came within two kilometres of finishing the stage Fabio Aru, the Italians teammate Jakob Fuglsang, and the Colombian Rigoberto Urn, win of the Tours toughest stagecoach and back to his best after a charm in the wilderness. Nairo Quintana and Simon Yates were in a quintet 1min 15 sec back, so within reach, but after a 4min 19 sec loss, Contador may not even prepare the top 10 in Paris.

Chris Froome rides up the Mont du Chat during stage nine, a 181.5 km stagecoach from Nantua to Chambry. Photo: Chris Graythen/ Getty Images

With three long, viciously steep ascendings where the riders were reduced to walking tempo and correspond drops-off reached slippery by early torrent, with more than 4,700 metres horizontal raising, and half the hors catgorie climbs in the entire hasten, this stage pushed all the riders to their restrictions, and some Porte, Robert Gesink, Geraint Thomas, Arnaud Dmare beyond those limits.

The crashes annihilated five equestrians, but more may follow, and seven finished outside these limits, including Tuesdays winner Dmare and three of his teammates in the FDJ team who had harboured him through the stage. Mondays rest day after the flight to the Dordogne will provide some time for repose and thought but recovery may take a little longer.

An early offensive by Romain Bardets AG2R team on the perilously slippy drop-off from the first major climbing, the Cte de la Biche, mounted the atmosphere, with the local equestrians assaulting both the early escape a merely 39 equestrians to Saturdays 50 and the central peloton. They were lucky only to leave the road once, and it was on this madcap swoop that Thomass race ended with a separated collarbone.

Contadors nightmare began on the second major ascent, the Grand Colombier, which took the riders back over the same ridge as La Biche, but further along. At the paw of the rising, he had to make an effort to regain linked with Froomes group after misplacing ground on the descent, and in a higher place he gathered his hoof out of the pedal and fell.

After a brief respite, the Mont du Chat encountered the first major sort-out between the hopefuls, punctuated by what could prove one of the races talking spots when Aru attempted to remove Froome in a carbon copy of his former lead Vincenzo Nibalis attack in 2015 when the Team Sky captain suffered a mechanical defect in the Alps. Six kilometres from the top of the Chat, Froome slipped back and caused his arm to application a bike change, which Aru watched as a cue to sprint ahead. He was restrained by Porte, Quintana and Contador, and different groups slow-going, stalling as Froome was allowed to regain contact.

No sooner was Froome back in the crease than Arus team-mate Fuglsang sprang away, gaining 30 sec, as if looking to profit from the fact the president might be a little smoke. At some time in the chaos, Froome could be seen travelling Aru into the side of the road as they exited a hairpin deflect, but Froome held there was no malice in it.

I wasnt aware of Fabios attack. I merely found out after the finish. I had a bit of a wobble on one of the switchbacks but in no way was it a swipe at Aru. I just lost my steering round the corner.

Froomes team-mate Mikel Nieve was delegated to hold Fuglsang at bay, and that increased number of tempo both did for Contador, and provoked a series of probing accelerations from Porte, Aru, Dan Martin and Bardet. Each season, Froome – by now without team teammates – was forced to respond. It was classic bike racing and eventually, as Quintana and Yates began to struggle, the race captain answered in kind. His efforts approaching the upper part of the clamber had Bardet, Martin and Aru on the point of rupture.

Bardet made his move a couple of kilometres after Porte and Martins crash, taking a hundred metres lead on Froome, Uran, Fuglsang and Aru. He unfolded that to 26 sec on the run-in to Chambry, modernise another Frenchman, Warren Barguil, who had led the race over the Colombier and the Chat, and who now has a serious alternative on succes in the King of the Mountains prize. A tantalising expectation gesticulated: a stage win in their own homes town of the Ag2R team, a 10 sec period bonus, maybe a threat to Froome. It was not to be.

Perhaps unwisely, Bardet left Barguil behind on the last rise before the run-in, and behind, Froome and the Astana duo of Fuglsang and Aru threw their differences behind them, with Urn chipping in to the pursue despite having exclusively the use of his highest gear. The quadruplet scooped up Barguil and lent Bardet with two kilometres abiding, setting up a six-man sprint finish which went to Urn by a tyre from Barguil.

The last-place stroke of inhumanity was reserved for the young Breton, who created his arm in the air, and was immediately employed live on French television with the interviewer predicting his win even as the photo finish was consulted. His tears were expected, but when they came, they were bitter ones of win, ending a daylight of merciless charm such as cycling only rarely produces.

Stage nine solutions

Rigoberto Uran( Colombia/ Cannondale) 5:07: 22 2. Warren Barguil( France/ Sunweb) ST 3. Chris Froome( Britain/ Team Sky) 4. Romain Bardet( France/ AG2R) 5. Fabio Aru( Italy/ Astana) 6. Jakob Fuglsang( Denmark/ Astana) 7. George Bennett( New Zealand/ LottoNL) +1:15 8. Mikel Landa( Spain/ Team Sky) 9. Daniel Martin( Ireland/ Quick-Step) 10. Nairo Quintana( Colombia/ Movistar) 11. Simon Yates( Britain/ Orica) 12. Tiesj Benoot( Belgium/ Lotto) +3:32 13. Mikel Nieve( Spain/ Team Sky) 14. Louis Meintjes( South Africa/ UAE Team Emirates) 15. Pierre Latour( France/ AG2R) +4:19 16. Alexis Vuillermoz( France/ AG2R) 17. Sergio Henao( Colombia/ Team Sky) 18. Damiano Caruso( Italy/ BMC Racing) 19. Primoz Roglic( Slovenia/ LottoNL) 20. Alberto Contador( Spain/ Trek) 21. Bauke Mollema( Netherlands/ Trek) +4:50 22. Jan Bakelants( Belgium/ AG2R) +6:17 23. Daniel Navarro( Spain/ Cofidis) 24. Emanuel Buchmann( Germany/ BORA) +7:13 25. Carlos Betancur( Colombia/ Movistar) 26. Brice Feillu( France/ Fortuneo) +8:07 27. Tony Gallopin( France/ Lotto) 28. Jarlinson Pantano( Colombia/ Trek)

General classification

Chris Froome( Britain/ Team Sky) 38:26: 28 2. Fabio Aru( Italy/ Astana) +18 3. Romain Bardet( France/ AG2R) +51 4. Rigoberto Uran( Colombia/ Cannondale) +55 5. Jakob Fuglsang( Denmark/ Astana) +1:37 6. Daniel Martin( Ireland/ Quick-Step) +1:44 7. Simon Yates( Britain/ Orica) +2:02 8. Nairo Quintana( Colombia/ Movistar) +2:13 9. Mikel Landa( Spain/ Team Sky) +3:06 10. George Bennett( New Zealand/ LottoNL) +3:53

The post Richie Porte and Geraint Thomas crash out of Tour as Froome preserves yellow-bellied appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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[nickpetriccaships]

concert story- magic man x smallpools

SO after school my two friends and i walked to my friend’s house to change and stuff then we got in the car and drove into the city. We got to the venue about 2 and a half hours before doors opened and were the third group of people on line which was sweg. It was hella cold though and i was wearing a skirt so that wasnt v fun. ANYWAY we were just chillin and we see Sam, Joey, and Gabe carrying equipment into the venue????? it was just SUPER COOL to see them in person irl up close and personal. we also saw queen jb walk in and her haircut was ROCKIN! we also saw beau come out and that was rad 2.

while we were waiting in line, i saw the lead singer from WATERS walk by so i ran up to him and said “hey i got you guys a gift!” (lil back story- they really like pumpkin spice lattes, so i had tweeted them the night before asking if they had a keurig or just a regular coffee maker and bought them pumpkin spice coffee grinds). he was like aight sweet! but you see that purple van over there? you can just walk over and tap on the window and tell them that you got them a gift". so i was like um ok? i walked over thinking that it was just going to be a crew member or someone that i would hand the gift to, so i walked over to their van and waved at the window and was like “heeyyy so he said to come over here and say i have a gift for you guys, so…i have a gift for you guys!” so then (to my surprise) the WHOLE band got out of the van??? i was like oh good golly gosh its all of you guys!! so they all got out and introduced themselves and i gave them my present and they were like YOOOO this is THE BEST! we’re going to make this backstage later! and then i explained to them that i was the one who had tweeted them asking what type of coffee maker they had and sara was like “oh yeah lol we were like huuhhh, whats this about?” so then shes like HEY lets put this in the snap story! and i was like ????? ok??? so we filmed the snapstory and she sent it to me as well and it was the coolest thing evar? then we just hung out a bit and chatted which was super cool!

SO we ate dinner and whatnot while waiting on line, and we were sitting near this wall thing and we could hear MM sound-checking!!! they were playing chicagoland, and it was just such a happy moment for me because i love that song a lot and to hear them sound check just made me rlly happy. we heard WATERS sound-checking as well so that was coooool!

After a long wait, 7pm came and we went into the venue. we passed the merch table on our way in so i was able to drop off my gift for MM and grab postcards and tattoos for the street team. we were like the third line of people which was SO close!!!!

WATERS performed first and they were SOSO GOOD!! andrew (the drummer) went to throw his drumstick out after their set, and ofc everyone was waving but i think he saw me and sorta nodded in my direction and threw it, except i didnt catch it bc some girl next to me grabbed it before hand. :((((

after WATERS, Magic Man performed and they were SO LOVELY!!! they didnt sing chicagoland even though they performed it during soundcheck, so i thought that was kinda weird and a bit disappointing but i still got to hear it so it was ok. they also sang honey and sweet jesus that was beautiful. seriously. caplow busted out those moves during honey and im pretty sure that i physically can not have kids after watching that performance bc wow.

but after they were done they were cleaning up the stage and stuff and a crew guy grabbed the setlist and I GOT IT!!!! except my friend amelia was standing in front of me and she also had it in her hand but i didnt know that it was her and i wasnt about to let some girl take this set list frm me!1 so long story short it got ripped in half but it was ok bc it was like the happiest moment of my life.

after MM smallpools performed, and they were rad as h*ck!! i was super excited to see them bc i went to two tours that they were supposed to open for but it ended up being other opening bands instead?. during killer whales tho they passed out this huge ass blow up “killer whale” and it actually hit the chandelier and it started to shake and everyone was like wtf and we all had a phantom moment, but thank goodness it didnt fall or anything?

while smallpools was performing, my friend’s cousin was at the merch table and texted saying that acap was there, and we really wanted to meet him (again lol) so we decided to leave after smallpools sang killer whales, which was their third to last song.

so our lil trio went out to merch and i was able to get my gift and give it to caplow! we did a lil hello hug and then i said that i had got lil gifts for everyone in the band, and that i got him snapea crisps but i wasnt sure if he liked caesar or lightly salted so i just got both and he said AWWWW and gave me another hug and i criieddd. (side note- i had tweeted him a few days before asking what his fave snacks were and one of them was snapea crisps). theeen i got him to sign a postcard and the setlsit i caught and we took a pic and after we took a super cute picture i went in for another hug and i s2g- HE FUCKING NUZZLED MY HEAD. LIKE YOU KNOW HOW YOU GO TO CUDDLE W SOMEONE AND YOU LIKE NUZZLE THEM? WELL THATS WHAT HAPPENED. i just about melted and was certainly not ok.

it was real nice getting to see caplow again, and i told him how excited i was to see MM and that it was my third time seeing them and all that jazz. after we all got pics we bought merch and sara and andrew from waters were at their merch table to we chatted with them a bit too.

while all that was going on, smallpools was finishing up their last two songs (kareoke and dreaming) and during dreaming alex went into the venue and was dancing and jumping around and it was super cute.

once the concert ended we left the venue and drove home, but it was the most spectacular night ever and definitely in my top 3 favorite concerts ive been to!!!

i took some killer pics and posted the videos i took on the YouTube, so hmu for links and such or just randomness if you want to talk or have any q’s!

also if you read this whole thing thanks youre sooper sooper rad and i hope alex caplow will nuzzle your head one day.

[sweetlifetownsville]

Hard Going Getting On Top Of The Hill: The Mayor's Magnificent Mount Louisa Make-Over Might Stumble At The First Jump

And Jenny knows about the problem, but is blithely telling us its all go, when it may well be all stop. The Pie shares a most interesting email. The old bird can reveal that Mayor Jenny Hill IS under investigation by Brisbane authorities for possible misconduct and watching all the fumbling inanities coming over the next 12 months in the run-up to local council elections is going to be more fun than watching a blind man trying to get out of a door knob factory. To that end, The Pie this week introduces a new occasional award, The Codswallop Cup. No shortage of contenders. Also, our new white ele sorry, stadium, has hit more turbulence as it rises from the mud and Lozza Lancini will not be a happy chappy. Bentley has a say on George Pells new lifestyle And our regular gallery from Trumpistan. First, Hot Of The Rumour Mill

The most interesting rumour has just floated into the Nest. Its unverified (well duh, thats why its called a rumour) so well have to wait until the Astonisher plays catchup sometime this week. The Pie hears that the only two tenderers for the new stadiums ultra-lucrative catering contract , one being the incumbent Spotless and one being the Cowboys Leagues Club, have both been excluded for non compliant tenders to do with not paying award wages. So back to square one for the new stadium and where does that leave Spotless in the current stadium? For the answer, check the Astonisher around oh, say, next Friday, by when Lozza Lancini will have told iditor Jenna Cairney what she can say about this. Pell Mell Nothing has been quite as spectacular in the annals of fallen high flyers than that of George Pell, who has swapped his glittering Mardi Gras cardinals robes for prison drab, after being sent to chokey for six years (to serve 3 years and 8 months before eligible for parole) for what only be described as the most brazen, power-deluded child abuse imaginable. Indeed so brazen as to leave lingering doubts among some observers whether such things couldve happened as described, but an appeal will sort that out, after all, the jury knows things that we do not. Now Georgy Boy faces another biased jury his fellow inmates, a class of folk not known for their strict adherence to jurisprudence rules and who exercise their own summary justice according to their own morals and mythology. And Bentley reckons you never know who youre going to bump in in the Yard.

And The Pie says to those who say the term is not enough, rest assured, for a man of Pells pomposity, ego and age, he has been handed a life sentence of one sort or another. One imagines there is one person who will give Judge Peter Kidd the thumbs up.

Shifty Business Delivering on promises is a tricky business, especially when our mayor is in campaign mode. Today, we were offered this little bit of click bait.

But when we went through to the story, what we got was this

Uncanny how this is so ambiguous, like the Castle Hill upgrade itself. Now this is media sleight of hand at its clumsiest, making a highly speculative project sound like solid fact. Interesting because it simply that the TCC will start drawing up plans for what it would like to see at Mt Louisa and crucially for mayor Mullet is the quote: with construction expected by the end of the year. Community engagement started this week and will continue until the end of April. The Pie thought, well thats a nice idea, if conveniently timed to become a re-election boast, but hey, good for the huffnpuff crowd. Then this morning, (Sat) an email fluttered into the Nest. From Angela Sacilotto Councillor Jenny Hills grand plan for Mt Louisa is another political stunt with council elections due in March 2020. TCC do not own all of Mt Louisa. I own a 8 ha block right across the middle of the hill. I have told TCC I do not want to sell. Havent been able to verify Ms Sacilottos information, but she volunteered her contact details and phone number if The Pie wanted a chat about the matter (which for reasons well known to regular readers, is not a viable option since the recent operation.) But The Pie would guess there will be whole lot more to the meaning of community engagement when Mayor Mullet reads this. it is known that Jenny Hill does not like being crossed by people with legal rights who stand in the way of her grand visions, so this community engagement with Ms Sacilotto could involve nipple clamps, a car battery and wet towels . But That May Be The Least Of Her Problems Cant reveal too much at the moment, but our mayor is being officially investigated possible misconduct over her Adani links, particularly arising out of her trip to India. This will not be a revelation on her, because she has been informed of the issue by the Brisbane based investigating body, and what is officially termed overt inquiries are underway. Perhaps no biggy (but then again ) but not a great look for someone who once expressed her admiration for Ipswich Mayor Pisasale. What Dreams May Come, As Willy Shakespeare Once Said All this has led to The Magpie being told that Jenny, a Hitchcock fan, recently watched his classic The Birds, but when she went to bed, she had an horrific dream.

Serves her right for throwing darts at a much loved and protected Australian species. THIS WEEKS CONTENDERS FOR THE CODSWALLOP CUP Its a crowded field. Cmon, Really? Cmon now, seriously Jenna Cairney? Is this all youve got?

Listen, me dear old haggis-head, getting shocked by a menu may apply to a Korean doggy delicacy, a Vietnamese cockroach kebab or the price of a pie at the footy, but because this mob is adding burgers bloody good old Aussie burgers we Aussie snowflakes should be shocked? Do you not understand how insulting this advertorial pap is? One seriously has to question whether the decision makers who publish this clap trap have an IQ above room temperature. A Group Effort Where to start with this one, the inanity is of such magnitude that The Pie is tempted to inaugurate the Clusterfuck Cup as a separate category.

This mind-blowing little corker of an idea is called the Palmer Street Precinct Activation project, and involves wait for it a bit of new lighting along the street, and a new sign saying hang on again Palmer Street.

The plan was obviously to give re-election hopefuls a bit of sorely needed publicity (youd think on recent photographic evidence, Messagebank Walker and Ann-Maree Greaney are going steady). But for other reasons, the story raised both an eyebrow and a guffaw at the same time. Chef/restaurateur Matt Merrin, normally a sensible and successful man, made a right goof of himself when he (reportedly) told the paper the changes would transform Palmer Street into a world class destination. It will be something that visitors to Townsville can Instagram, take photos of and sell the message to the world. Its going to bring new investment back to Palmer Street (question: how does new investment come back?) Weve had many restaurants close over the last 12 months, this will inspire new restaurant owners and people to come back into Palmer Street and be part of the precinct it once was. A world class destination? Matt, a message from The Magpie, mate lay off the cooking sherry and exotic herbs before talking to the Astonisher (FFS, mate, youre even holding your glass crooked.) The story also informs us The dining strip received some upgrades during the preparations for the Commonwealth Games last year. Oh did it? Very similar upgrades in scale to the ones now proposed , as The Pie remembers. So in the year since that spruce up, two Palmer Street nose-baggeries have gone belly-up. But somehow, this one is going to usher in a new era? Hows that? But heres the best bit in the original story, Ann-Maree Greaney said the lighting would keep people, particularly women, safer that apparent admission that the council has allowed Palmer Street to operate without adequately safe lighting for years has now been removed from the story. What fucking planet are you from, you lot? Reporter Chris Lees, have you no dignity? Or sober judgement? Did TCC media gopfer Simpo Templeton have anything to do with this, its about his speed? Well, anyway Anthony, unlike the when at the Astonisher, at least in your TCC role you dont have to put your name to your cock-ups. 3. Off The Rails Then on Thursday, we had this little bit of fluffy irrelevancy.

But no sooner had this flimsy kite taken to the sky, than the Astonisher itself cut the string on Friday with this:

What city rail plan? There wasnt any, the original story was a campaigning thought-fart from the desperate Clr Jacob. Clever though, isnt it write bullshit one day and call it out as bullshit the next. Gotta luv the ol Astonisher. A Miscellaneous Magpie Whinge The Magpie is deliberately not talking about or seeking comment on the massacre in New Zealand, he has no words, certainly none that would contribute positively to this dark deed of pure evil. But coverage does prompt The Pie to vent about a favourite piece of nanny state demeaning idiocy can we please move away from the rubber-faced sign language person standing next to officials who are often making statements about deeply disturbing matters. Often signing involves grotesque and to the uninitiated completely inappropriate comical facial expressions. This presents the twin problems of distraction for the general audience and indignity for the subject of the media conference.The Pie doesnt know what the average deaf audience would be at any given time not many one would guess and yes, there are times like bushfire and flood updates where this information should be conveyed in this manner. But shit folks, heres a newsflash for more 60 years now, real time lower screen captioning has been available, or as all sports directors so slickly employ technology for a smaller, less distracting vision box to one corner. To currently give such a minority a so distracting and undignified presence is not necessary and lacks dignity, and disturbs concentration on what can be vital messages. Of course, nanny staters wont agree. Speaking Of The Nanny State Our evolving language, not always for the better, now features the term woke, as in are you woke to climate change? or any number of other social issues. It means are you alert to, but as so often happens, we too readily adopt the argot of the ill-educated as some sort expression of being cool and identifying with a group one wouldnt normally break bread with. The lovely thing about this nonsensical use of substitute language leaves it wide open for hysterically funny skewering and in this classic piss take Are You Woke? from a fed up Tracey Ullman. The Clock Is A-Ticking The Brexit imbroglio is increasingly hard to follow (or for The Pie, to care much about) but one of the cleverest pictorial comments the predicament of Theresa (dis)May(ed) comes from the Guardians Steve Bell.

And More Of The Same From Trumpistan A lot of attention continues to surround the tumble of democrats eager to take on President Trumpet at the polls next year. And the interest has been heightened by someone not running.

. The ducking, weaving and hilarity of the comments section runs 24/7, so give us of your best, folks. And if you like the blog, you can show your appreciation with some sorely needed financial support, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/hard-going-getting-on-top-of-the-hill-the-mayors-magnificent-mount-louisa-make-over-might-stumble-at-the-first-jump/

[sweetlifetownsville]

Hard Going Getting On Top Of The Hill: The Mayor's Magnificent Mount Louisa Make-Over Might Stumble At The First Jump

And Jenny knows about the problem, but is blithely telling us its all go, when it may well be all stop. The Pie shares a most interesting email. The old bird can reveal that Mayor Jenny Hill IS under investigation by Brisbane authorities for possible misconduct and watching all the fumbling inanities coming over the next 12 months in the run-up to local council elections is going to be more fun than watching a blind man trying to get out of a door knob factory. To that end, The Pie this week introduces a new occasional award, The Codswallop Cup. No shortage of contenders. Also, our new white ele sorry, stadium, has hit more turbulence as it rises from the mud and Lozza Lancini will not be a happy chappy. Bentley has a say on George Pells new lifestyle And our regular gallery from Trumpistan. First, Hot Of The Rumour Mill The most interesting rumour has just floated into the Nest. Its unverified (well duh, thats why its called a rumour) so well have to wait until the Astonisher plays catchup sometime this week. The Pie hears that the only two tenderers for the new stadiums ultra-lucrative catering contract , one being the incumbent Spotless and one being the Cowboys Leagues Club, have both been excluded for non compliant tenders to do with not paying award wages. So back to square one for the new stadium and where does that leave Spotless in the current stadium? For the answer, check the Astonisher around oh, say, next Friday, by when Lozza Lancini will have told iditor Jenna Cairney what she can say about this. Pell Mell Nothing has been quite as spectacular in the annals of fallen high flyers than that of George Pell, who has swapped his glittering Mardi Gras cardinals robes for prison drab, after being sent to chokey for six years (to serve 3 years and 8 months before eligible for parole) for what only be described as the most brazen, power-deluded child abuse imaginable. Indeed so brazen as to leave lingering doubts among some observers whether such things couldve happened as described, but an appeal will sort that out, after all, the jury knows things that we do not. Now Georgy Boy faces another biased jury his fellow inmates, a class of folk not known for their strict adherence to jurisprudence rules and who exercise their own summary justice according to their own morals and mythology. And Bentley reckons you never know who youre going to bump in in the Yard. And The Pie says to those who say the term is not enough, rest assured, for a man of Pells pomposity, ego and age, he has been handed a life sentence of one sort or another. One imagines there is one person who will give Judge Peter Kidd the thumbs up. Shifty Business Delivering on promises is a tricky business, especially when our mayor is in campaign mode. Today, we were offered this little bit of click bait. But when we went through to the story, what we got was this Uncanny how this is so ambiguous, like the Castle Hill upgrade itself. Now this is media sleight of hand at its clumsiest, making a highly speculative project sound like solid fact. Interesting because it simply that the TCC will start drawing up plans for what it would like to see at Mt Louisa and crucially for mayor Mullet is the quote: with construction expected by the end of the year. Community engagement started this week and will continue until the end of April. The Pie thought, well thats a nice idea, if conveniently timed to become a re-election boast, but hey, good for the huffnpuff crowd. Then this morning, (Sat) an email fluttered into the Nest. From Angela Sacilotto Councillor Jenny Hills grand plan for Mt Louisa is another political stunt with council elections due in March 2020. TCC do not own all of Mt Louisa. I own a 8 ha block right across the middle of the hill. I have told TCC I do not want to sell. Havent been able to verify Ms Sacilottos information, but she volunteered her contact details and phone number if The Pie wanted a chat about the matter (which for reasons well known to regular readers, is not a viable option since the recent operation.) But The Pie would guess there will be whole lot more to the meaning of community engagement when Mayor Mullet reads this. it is known that Jenny Hill does not like being crossed by people with legal rights who stand in the way of her grand visions, so this community engagement with Ms Sacilotto could involve nipple clamps, a car battery and wet towels . But That May Be The Least Of Her Problems Cant reveal too much at the moment, but our mayor is being officially investigated possible misconduct over her Adani links, particularly arising out of her trip to India. This will not be a revelation on her, because she has been informed of the issue by the Brisbane based investigating body, and what is officially termed overt inquiries are underway. Perhaps no biggy (but then again ) but not a great look for someone who once expressed her admiration for Ipswich Mayor Pisasale. What Dreams May Come, As Willy Shakespeare Once Said All this has led to The Magpie being told that Jenny, a Hitchcock fan, recently watched his classic The Birds, but when she went to bed, she had an horrific dream. Serves her right for throwing darts at a much loved and protected Australian species. THIS WEEKS CONTENDERS FOR THE CODSWALLOP CUP Its a crowded field. Cmon, Really? Cmon now, seriously Jenna Cairney? Is this all youve got? Listen, me dear old haggis-head, getting shocked by a menu may apply to a Korean doggy delicacy, a Vietnamese cockroach kebab or the price of a pie at the footy, but because this mob is adding burgers bloody good old Aussie burgers we Aussie snowflakes should be shocked? Do you not understand how insulting this advertorial pap is? One seriously has to question whether the decision makers who publish this clap trap have an IQ above room temperature. A Group Effort Where to start with this one, the inanity is of such magnitude that The Pie is tempted to inaugurate the Clusterfuck Cup as a separate category. This mind-blowing little corker of an idea is called the Palmer Street Precinct Activation project, and involves wait for it a bit of new lighting along the street, and a new sign saying hang on again Palmer Street. The plan was obviously to give re-election hopefuls a bit of sorely needed publicity (youd think on recent photographic evidence, Messagebank Walker and Ann-Maree Greaney are going steady). But for other reasons, the story raised both an eyebrow and a guffaw at the same time. Chef/restaurateur Matt Merrin, normally a sensible and successful man, made a right goof of himself when he (reportedly) told the paper the changes would transform Palmer Street into a world class destination. It will be something that visitors to Townsville can Instagram, take photos of and sell the message to the world. Its going to bring new investment back to Palmer Street (question: how does new investment come back?) Weve had many restaurants close over the last 12 months, this will inspire new restaurant owners and people to come back into Palmer Street and be part of the precinct it once was. A world class destination? Matt, a message from The Magpie, mate lay off the cooking sherry and exotic herbs before talking to the Astonisher (FFS, mate, youre even holding your glass crooked.) The story also informs us The dining strip received some upgrades during the preparations for the Commonwealth Games last year. Oh did it? Very similar upgrades in scale to the ones now proposed , as The Pie remembers. So in the year since that spruce up, two Palmer Street nose-baggeries have gone belly-up. But somehow, this one is going to usher in a new era? Hows that? But heres the best bit in the original story, Ann-Maree Greaney said the lighting would keep people, particularly women, safer that apparent admission that the council has allowed Palmer Street to operate without adequately safe lighting for years has now been removed from the story. What fucking planet are you from, you lot? Reporter Chris Lees, have you no dignity? Or sober judgement? Did TCC media gopfer Simpo Templeton have anything to do with this, its about his speed? Well, anyway Anthony, unlike the when at the Astonisher, at least in your TCC role you dont have to put your name to your cock-ups. 3. Off The Rails Then on Thursday, we had this little bit of fluffy irrelevancy. But no sooner had this flimsy kite taken to the sky, than the Astonisher itself cut the string on Friday with this: What city rail plan? There wasnt any, the original story was a campaigning thought-fart from the desperate Clr Jacob. Clever though, isnt it write bullshit one day and call it out as bullshit the next. Gotta luv the ol Astonisher. A Miscellaneous Magpie Whinge The Magpie is deliberately not talking about or seeking comment on the massacre in New Zealand, he has no words, certainly none that would contribute positively to this dark deed of pure evil. But coverage does prompt The Pie to vent about a favourite piece of nanny state demeaning idiocy can we please move away from the rubber-faced sign language person standing next to officials who are often making statements about deeply disturbing matters. Often signing involves grotesque and to the uninitiated completely inappropriate comical facial expressions. This presents the twin problems of distraction for the general audience and indignity for the subject of the media conference.The Pie doesnt know what the average deaf audience would be at any given time not many one would guess and yes, there are times like bushfire and flood updates where this information should be conveyed in this manner. But shit folks, heres a newsflash for more 60 years now, real time lower screen captioning has been available, or as all sports directors so slickly employ technology for a smaller, less distracting vision box to one corner. To currently give such a minority a so distracting and undignified presence is not necessary and lacks dignity, and disturbs concentration on what can be vital messages. Of course, nanny staters wont agree. Speaking Of The Nanny State Our evolving language, not always for the better, now features the term woke, as in are you woke to climate change? or any number of other social issues. It means are you alert to, but as so often happens, we too readily adopt the argot of the ill-educated as some sort expression of being cool and identifying with a group one wouldnt normally break bread with. The lovely thing about this nonsensical use of substitute language leaves it wide open for hysterically funny skewering and in this classic piss take Are You Woke? from a fed up Tracey Ullman. The Clock Is A-Ticking The Brexit imbroglio is increasingly hard to follow (or for The Pie, to care much about) but one of the cleverest pictorial comments the predicament of Theresa (dis)May(ed) comes from the Guardians Steve Bell. And More Of The Same From Trumpistan A lot of attention continues to surround the tumble of democrats eager to take on President Trumpet at the polls next year. And the interest has been heightened by someone not running. . The ducking, weaving and hilarity of the comments section runs 24/7, so give us of your best, folks. And if you like the blog, you can show your appreciation with some sorely needed financial support, the how to donate button is below. http://www.townsvillemagpie.com.au/hard-going-getting-on-top-of-the-hill-the-mayors-magnificent-mount-louisa-make-over-might-stumble-at-the-first-jump/

[apsbicepstraining]

Richie Porte and Geraint Thomas crash out of Tour as Froome preserves yellow-bellied

Geraint Thomas and Richie Porte are out of the Tour de France after crashing on stage nine, with Thomas maintaining a believed separate collarbone, but Chris Froome still leads

Chris Froome will razz the rest of the Tour de France without his first lieutenant, Geraint Thomas, and close friend and principal competitor, Richie Porte, after the Welshman and Australian were forced to quit the hasten following slick swoops which diverted the ninth stage into a chaotic demolition derby from Nantua to Chambry. Froome held the yellow t-shirt after the stage was triumphed by the Colombian Rigoberto Urn.

The dates official medical report rostered 11 fallers with a range of classic clang traumata: a shoulder disorganization and punctured lung for Manuele Mori, a shattered vertebra for Robert Gesink, a dislocated kneecap for Jess Herrada, who was announced as having abandoned but finished the stage. The 2016 King of the Mountains, Rafal Majka, was blamed for the Thomas crash and purposed up with deep abrasions to both knees and elbows.

Thomas said: Everyone was nervous, everyone wanted to be at the figurehead and a few people were duelling to get between myself, Froomey and the rest of the boys. I let[ Rafal] Majka in and then he came down right in front of me on a straight chip of road. I had nowhere to go, gone over the top of him, and territory on my collarbone.

Team physician Jimmy[ Juan Mercadel] told you he thought it was broken but I got back on the motorcycle and carried on down the descent, but when I got on the flat I knew something was wrong. Then the race doctor said exactly the same so I intent up stopping then, travelled for a scan, and its broken.

Thomas, who was lying second overall behind his squad chairman Froome, had won stagecoach one in Dsseldorf and wore the hasten captains yellow t-shirt until the first tough hilltop finish at La Planche des Belles Filles last-place Wednesday. He had already lived three minor disintegrates in the Tours opening eight periods but his fourth, on the drop-off from the first hors catgorie ascent of the Tour, the Col de la Biche, 70 km into the stage, left him lying in the gutter, before he was sent to hospital. He was thrust out of the Giro dItalia this year after a mass pile-up caused by a motorbike.

G has interrupted his collarbone for sure, which is destroying for him, said Team Skys general manager, Sir Dave Brailsford. He had the clang in the Giro, then the rollercoaster of “re coming” and being in yellow after triumphing the earliest stages, and then separating his collarbone today.

Well get our arms around him and make sure hes all right. Well get him back on track but thats not nice to see.

Porte fell about 95 km later as the elite group of race favourites around Froome were flying down from the final ascent of the working day, the Mont du Chat, high above the town of Aix-les-Bains. The BMC leader was passing at more than 45 mph when his front wheel descended off the left-hand surface of a sinuous stretching of superhighway, he lost dominance and ricochetted off the rock face on the other side. As he did so he was hit by the Irishman Daniel Martin, who was able to select himself up after a high-speed somersault over Porte but who then fell again immediately prior to finishing ninth.

I dont think anyone want to get take risks there, but it was so slick for the purposes of the trees, said Martin. Richie locked up his back wheel, travelled straight into the grass, just wiped out, and his bicycle exactly collected me. Earlier, Martin was within an superstar of being created down in Thomass crash. He lent: I was very lucky the first time. Geraint went down and his motorcycle smacked my handlebars. I got through but my luck run out.

The Porte spill was followed by a second one, in which Martin was given a replacement wheel, merely to find it did not mesh with his restraints. I got a spare rotation off[ the neutral] Mavic[ busines auto] but I didnt have any dampers. I couldnt stop and became straight-shooting on. The second one wasnt really much. I just got a spare bike off the team car and got starting again.

Urn had problems of his own as one of the two fallers bicycles reached his rear derailleur a glancing jolt, drawing it impossible for him to change gear.

Porte lay still on the road, was placed on a person board and sent to hospital in the race ambulance. The official hasten doctor Florence Pommery, who had inclined him by the roadside, said his injuries did not appear to be serious. Id say there was more suspicion than harm. He was perfectly self-conscious, was pronouncing ordinarily and could recollect everything about the disintegrate. The official medical report said he had a blow to the pate,( without self-evident concussion) and bruising to his pelvis; X-ray solutions were awaited.

BMC team doctor Max Testa later said Porte had suffered a cracked collarbone and a fractured pelvis.

Normally, a fractured clavicle and pelvis would require four to six weeks retrieval, providing there are no complications, Testa said. If everything be applicable to project, Richie could be back on the motorcycle at the opening up of August and gradually build his fitness up from there.

BMC sports administrator Fabio Baldato said Porte had a lot of suffering but had remained conscious after the crash.

For Thomas this was the latest in a series of major clangs in the past three years. The Welsh double Olympic gold medallist finished the Tour in 2013 with a broken pelvis crashed out of Paris-Nice in 2014, when second overall, and was thrust out of this years Giro dItaliaafter a mass pile-up caused by a motorbike. He has hit a tree in Tirreno-Adriatico, a telegraph pole at Gap in the 2015 Tour, fell spectacularly in the 2015 Paris-Roubaix, and witnessed his likelihoods in last years Olympic road race smashed by a nasty fell off the final descent.

Froomes hand strengthens as he improves title momentum

Chris Froome moved out of his press conference after the stage in irritation after the same journalist asked him an issue that had already been raised regarding an seeming falling out with Fabio Aru, but the yellow jersey owner had every right to be on edge. He was far from the only one, after a daytime of utter chaos with nerves, humours, t-shirts, surfaces, and riches all frayed by the end.

Froome arrived in Chambry with his the opportunities of taking a fourth Tour strengthened after a tumultuous 181 kilometres through the Jura, which enabled him to pull away from key rivals such as Nairo Quintana, Alberto Contador and Richie Porte, the latter in extremely unfortunate circumstances.

Froome even managed to increase his overall precede by four seconds thanks a day bonus for third place at the finish, where the only overall contenders to finish on his ends were Romain Bardet who came within two kilometres of finishing the stage Fabio Aru, the Italians teammate Jakob Fuglsang, and the Colombian Rigoberto Urn, win of the Tours toughest stagecoach and back to his best after a charm in the wilderness. Nairo Quintana and Simon Yates were in a quintet 1min 15 sec back, so within reach, but after a 4min 19 sec loss, Contador may not even prepare the top 10 in Paris.

Chris Froome rides up the Mont du Chat during stage nine, a 181.5 km stagecoach from Nantua to Chambry. Photo: Chris Graythen/ Getty Images

With three long, viciously steep ascendings where the riders were reduced to walking tempo and correspond drops-off reached slippery by early torrent, with more than 4,700 metres horizontal raising, and half the hors catgorie climbs in the entire hasten, this stage pushed all the riders to their restrictions, and some Porte, Robert Gesink, Geraint Thomas, Arnaud Dmare beyond those limits.

The crashes annihilated five equestrians, but more may follow, and seven finished outside these limits, including Tuesdays winner Dmare and three of his teammates in the FDJ team who had harboured him through the stage. Mondays rest day after the flight to the Dordogne will provide some time for repose and thought but recovery may take a little longer.

An early offensive by Romain Bardets AG2R team on the perilously slippy drop-off from the first major climbing, the Cte de la Biche, mounted the atmosphere, with the local equestrians assaulting both the early escape a merely 39 equestrians to Saturdays 50 and the central peloton. They were lucky only to leave the road once, and it was on this madcap swoop that Thomass race ended with a separated collarbone.

Contadors nightmare began on the second major ascent, the Grand Colombier, which took the riders back over the same ridge as La Biche, but further along. At the paw of the rising, he had to make an effort to regain linked with Froomes group after misplacing ground on the descent, and in a higher place he gathered his hoof out of the pedal and fell.

After a brief respite, the Mont du Chat encountered the first major sort-out between the hopefuls, punctuated by what could prove one of the races talking spots when Aru attempted to remove Froome in a carbon copy of his former lead Vincenzo Nibalis attack in 2015 when the Team Sky captain suffered a mechanical defect in the Alps. Six kilometres from the top of the Chat, Froome slipped back and caused his arm to application a bike change, which Aru watched as a cue to sprint ahead. He was restrained by Porte, Quintana and Contador, and different groups slow-going, stalling as Froome was allowed to regain contact.

No sooner was Froome back in the crease than Arus team-mate Fuglsang sprang away, gaining 30 sec, as if looking to profit from the fact the president might be a little smoke. At some time in the chaos, Froome could be seen travelling Aru into the side of the road as they exited a hairpin deflect, but Froome held there was no malice in it.

I wasnt aware of Fabios attack. I merely found out after the finish. I had a bit of a wobble on one of the switchbacks but in no way was it a swipe at Aru. I just lost my steering round the corner.

Froomes team-mate Mikel Nieve was delegated to hold Fuglsang at bay, and that increased number of tempo both did for Contador, and provoked a series of probing accelerations from Porte, Aru, Dan Martin and Bardet. Each season, Froome – by now without team teammates – was forced to respond. It was classic bike racing and eventually, as Quintana and Yates began to struggle, the race captain answered in kind. His efforts approaching the upper part of the clamber had Bardet, Martin and Aru on the point of rupture.

Bardet made his move a couple of kilometres after Porte and Martins crash, taking a hundred metres lead on Froome, Uran, Fuglsang and Aru. He unfolded that to 26 sec on the run-in to Chambry, modernise another Frenchman, Warren Barguil, who had led the race over the Colombier and the Chat, and who now has a serious alternative on succes in the King of the Mountains prize. A tantalising expectation gesticulated: a stage win in their own homes town of the Ag2R team, a 10 sec period bonus, maybe a threat to Froome. It was not to be.

Perhaps unwisely, Bardet left Barguil behind on the last rise before the run-in, and behind, Froome and the Astana duo of Fuglsang and Aru threw their differences behind them, with Urn chipping in to the pursue despite having exclusively the use of his highest gear. The quadruplet scooped up Barguil and lent Bardet with two kilometres abiding, setting up a six-man sprint finish which went to Urn by a tyre from Barguil.

The last-place stroke of inhumanity was reserved for the young Breton, who created his arm in the air, and was immediately employed live on French television with the interviewer predicting his win even as the photo finish was consulted. His tears were expected, but when they came, they were bitter ones of win, ending a daylight of merciless charm such as cycling only rarely produces.

Stage nine solutions

Rigoberto Uran( Colombia/ Cannondale) 5:07: 22 2. Warren Barguil( France/ Sunweb) ST 3. Chris Froome( Britain/ Team Sky) 4. Romain Bardet( France/ AG2R) 5. Fabio Aru( Italy/ Astana) 6. Jakob Fuglsang( Denmark/ Astana) 7. George Bennett( New Zealand/ LottoNL) +1:15 8. Mikel Landa( Spain/ Team Sky) 9. Daniel Martin( Ireland/ Quick-Step) 10. Nairo Quintana( Colombia/ Movistar) 11. Simon Yates( Britain/ Orica) 12. Tiesj Benoot( Belgium/ Lotto) +3:32 13. Mikel Nieve( Spain/ Team Sky) 14. Louis Meintjes( South Africa/ UAE Team Emirates) 15. Pierre Latour( France/ AG2R) +4:19 16. Alexis Vuillermoz( France/ AG2R) 17. Sergio Henao( Colombia/ Team Sky) 18. Damiano Caruso( Italy/ BMC Racing) 19. Primoz Roglic( Slovenia/ LottoNL) 20. Alberto Contador( Spain/ Trek) 21. Bauke Mollema( Netherlands/ Trek) +4:50 22. Jan Bakelants( Belgium/ AG2R) +6:17 23. Daniel Navarro( Spain/ Cofidis) 24. Emanuel Buchmann( Germany/ BORA) +7:13 25. Carlos Betancur( Colombia/ Movistar) 26. Brice Feillu( France/ Fortuneo) +8:07 27. Tony Gallopin( France/ Lotto) 28. Jarlinson Pantano( Colombia/ Trek)

General classification

Chris Froome( Britain/ Team Sky) 38:26: 28 2. Fabio Aru( Italy/ Astana) +18 3. Romain Bardet( France/ AG2R) +51 4. Rigoberto Uran( Colombia/ Cannondale) +55 5. Jakob Fuglsang( Denmark/ Astana) +1:37 6. Daniel Martin( Ireland/ Quick-Step) +1:44 7. Simon Yates( Britain/ Orica) +2:02 8. Nairo Quintana( Colombia/ Movistar) +2:13 9. Mikel Landa( Spain/ Team Sky) +3:06 10. George Bennett( New Zealand/ LottoNL) +3:53

The post Richie Porte and Geraint Thomas crash out of Tour as Froome preserves yellow-bellied appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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[apsbicepstraining]

Richie Porte and Geraint Thomas crash out of Tour as Froome preserves yellow-bellied

Geraint Thomas and Richie Porte are out of the Tour de France after crashing on stage nine, with Thomas maintaining a believed separate collarbone, but Chris Froome still leads

Chris Froome will razz the rest of the Tour de France without his first lieutenant, Geraint Thomas, and close friend and principal competitor, Richie Porte, after the Welshman and Australian were forced to quit the hasten following slick swoops which diverted the ninth stage into a chaotic demolition derby from Nantua to Chambry. Froome held the yellow t-shirt after the stage was triumphed by the Colombian Rigoberto Urn.

The dates official medical report rostered 11 fallers with a range of classic clang traumata: a shoulder disorganization and punctured lung for Manuele Mori, a shattered vertebra for Robert Gesink, a dislocated kneecap for Jess Herrada, who was announced as having abandoned but finished the stage. The 2016 King of the Mountains, Rafal Majka, was blamed for the Thomas crash and purposed up with deep abrasions to both knees and elbows.

Thomas said: Everyone was nervous, everyone wanted to be at the figurehead and a few people were duelling to get between myself, Froomey and the rest of the boys. I let[ Rafal] Majka in and then he came down right in front of me on a straight chip of road. I had nowhere to go, gone over the top of him, and territory on my collarbone.

Team physician Jimmy[ Juan Mercadel] told you he thought it was broken but I got back on the motorcycle and carried on down the descent, but when I got on the flat I knew something was wrong. Then the race doctor said exactly the same so I intent up stopping then, travelled for a scan, and its broken.

Thomas, who was lying second overall behind his squad chairman Froome, had won stagecoach one in Dsseldorf and wore the hasten captains yellow t-shirt until the first tough hilltop finish at La Planche des Belles Filles last-place Wednesday. He had already lived three minor disintegrates in the Tours opening eight periods but his fourth, on the drop-off from the first hors catgorie ascent of the Tour, the Col de la Biche, 70 km into the stage, left him lying in the gutter, before he was sent to hospital. He was thrust out of the Giro dItalia this year after a mass pile-up caused by a motorbike.

G has interrupted his collarbone for sure, which is destroying for him, said Team Skys general manager, Sir Dave Brailsford. He had the clang in the Giro, then the rollercoaster of “re coming” and being in yellow after triumphing the earliest stages, and then separating his collarbone today.

Well get our arms around him and make sure hes all right. Well get him back on track but thats not nice to see.

Porte fell about 95 km later as the elite group of race favourites around Froome were flying down from the final ascent of the working day, the Mont du Chat, high above the town of Aix-les-Bains. The BMC leader was passing at more than 45 mph when his front wheel descended off the left-hand surface of a sinuous stretching of superhighway, he lost dominance and ricochetted off the rock face on the other side. As he did so he was hit by the Irishman Daniel Martin, who was able to select himself up after a high-speed somersault over Porte but who then fell again immediately prior to finishing ninth.

I dont think anyone want to get take risks there, but it was so slick for the purposes of the trees, said Martin. Richie locked up his back wheel, travelled straight into the grass, just wiped out, and his bicycle exactly collected me. Earlier, Martin was within an superstar of being created down in Thomass crash. He lent: I was very lucky the first time. Geraint went down and his motorcycle smacked my handlebars. I got through but my luck run out.

The Porte spill was followed by a second one, in which Martin was given a replacement wheel, merely to find it did not mesh with his restraints. I got a spare rotation off[ the neutral] Mavic[ busines auto] but I didnt have any dampers. I couldnt stop and became straight-shooting on. The second one wasnt really much. I just got a spare bike off the team car and got starting again.

Urn had problems of his own as one of the two fallers bicycles reached his rear derailleur a glancing jolt, drawing it impossible for him to change gear.

Porte lay still on the road, was placed on a person board and sent to hospital in the race ambulance. The official hasten doctor Florence Pommery, who had inclined him by the roadside, said his injuries did not appear to be serious. Id say there was more suspicion than harm. He was perfectly self-conscious, was pronouncing ordinarily and could recollect everything about the disintegrate. The official medical report said he had a blow to the pate,( without self-evident concussion) and bruising to his pelvis; X-ray solutions were awaited.

BMC team doctor Max Testa later said Porte had suffered a cracked collarbone and a fractured pelvis.

Normally, a fractured clavicle and pelvis would require four to six weeks retrieval, providing there are no complications, Testa said. If everything be applicable to project, Richie could be back on the motorcycle at the opening up of August and gradually build his fitness up from there.

BMC sports administrator Fabio Baldato said Porte had a lot of suffering but had remained conscious after the crash.

For Thomas this was the latest in a series of major clangs in the past three years. The Welsh double Olympic gold medallist finished the Tour in 2013 with a broken pelvis crashed out of Paris-Nice in 2014, when second overall, and was thrust out of this years Giro dItaliaafter a mass pile-up caused by a motorbike. He has hit a tree in Tirreno-Adriatico, a telegraph pole at Gap in the 2015 Tour, fell spectacularly in the 2015 Paris-Roubaix, and witnessed his likelihoods in last years Olympic road race smashed by a nasty fell off the final descent.

Froomes hand strengthens as he improves title momentum

Chris Froome moved out of his press conference after the stage in irritation after the same journalist asked him an issue that had already been raised regarding an seeming falling out with Fabio Aru, but the yellow jersey owner had every right to be on edge. He was far from the only one, after a daytime of utter chaos with nerves, humours, t-shirts, surfaces, and riches all frayed by the end.

Froome arrived in Chambry with his the opportunities of taking a fourth Tour strengthened after a tumultuous 181 kilometres through the Jura, which enabled him to pull away from key rivals such as Nairo Quintana, Alberto Contador and Richie Porte, the latter in extremely unfortunate circumstances.

Froome even managed to increase his overall precede by four seconds thanks a day bonus for third place at the finish, where the only overall contenders to finish on his ends were Romain Bardet who came within two kilometres of finishing the stage Fabio Aru, the Italians teammate Jakob Fuglsang, and the Colombian Rigoberto Urn, win of the Tours toughest stagecoach and back to his best after a charm in the wilderness. Nairo Quintana and Simon Yates were in a quintet 1min 15 sec back, so within reach, but after a 4min 19 sec loss, Contador may not even prepare the top 10 in Paris.

Chris Froome rides up the Mont du Chat during stage nine, a 181.5 km stagecoach from Nantua to Chambry. Photo: Chris Graythen/ Getty Images

With three long, viciously steep ascendings where the riders were reduced to walking tempo and correspond drops-off reached slippery by early torrent, with more than 4,700 metres horizontal raising, and half the hors catgorie climbs in the entire hasten, this stage pushed all the riders to their restrictions, and some Porte, Robert Gesink, Geraint Thomas, Arnaud Dmare beyond those limits.

The crashes annihilated five equestrians, but more may follow, and seven finished outside these limits, including Tuesdays winner Dmare and three of his teammates in the FDJ team who had harboured him through the stage. Mondays rest day after the flight to the Dordogne will provide some time for repose and thought but recovery may take a little longer.

An early offensive by Romain Bardets AG2R team on the perilously slippy drop-off from the first major climbing, the Cte de la Biche, mounted the atmosphere, with the local equestrians assaulting both the early escape a merely 39 equestrians to Saturdays 50 and the central peloton. They were lucky only to leave the road once, and it was on this madcap swoop that Thomass race ended with a separated collarbone.

Contadors nightmare began on the second major ascent, the Grand Colombier, which took the riders back over the same ridge as La Biche, but further along. At the paw of the rising, he had to make an effort to regain linked with Froomes group after misplacing ground on the descent, and in a higher place he gathered his hoof out of the pedal and fell.

After a brief respite, the Mont du Chat encountered the first major sort-out between the hopefuls, punctuated by what could prove one of the races talking spots when Aru attempted to remove Froome in a carbon copy of his former lead Vincenzo Nibalis attack in 2015 when the Team Sky captain suffered a mechanical defect in the Alps. Six kilometres from the top of the Chat, Froome slipped back and caused his arm to application a bike change, which Aru watched as a cue to sprint ahead. He was restrained by Porte, Quintana and Contador, and different groups slow-going, stalling as Froome was allowed to regain contact.

No sooner was Froome back in the crease than Arus team-mate Fuglsang sprang away, gaining 30 sec, as if looking to profit from the fact the president might be a little smoke. At some time in the chaos, Froome could be seen travelling Aru into the side of the road as they exited a hairpin deflect, but Froome held there was no malice in it.

I wasnt aware of Fabios attack. I merely found out after the finish. I had a bit of a wobble on one of the switchbacks but in no way was it a swipe at Aru. I just lost my steering round the corner.

Froomes team-mate Mikel Nieve was delegated to hold Fuglsang at bay, and that increased number of tempo both did for Contador, and provoked a series of probing accelerations from Porte, Aru, Dan Martin and Bardet. Each season, Froome – by now without team teammates – was forced to respond. It was classic bike racing and eventually, as Quintana and Yates began to struggle, the race captain answered in kind. His efforts approaching the upper part of the clamber had Bardet, Martin and Aru on the point of rupture.

Bardet made his move a couple of kilometres after Porte and Martins crash, taking a hundred metres lead on Froome, Uran, Fuglsang and Aru. He unfolded that to 26 sec on the run-in to Chambry, modernise another Frenchman, Warren Barguil, who had led the race over the Colombier and the Chat, and who now has a serious alternative on succes in the King of the Mountains prize. A tantalising expectation gesticulated: a stage win in their own homes town of the Ag2R team, a 10 sec period bonus, maybe a threat to Froome. It was not to be.

Perhaps unwisely, Bardet left Barguil behind on the last rise before the run-in, and behind, Froome and the Astana duo of Fuglsang and Aru threw their differences behind them, with Urn chipping in to the pursue despite having exclusively the use of his highest gear. The quadruplet scooped up Barguil and lent Bardet with two kilometres abiding, setting up a six-man sprint finish which went to Urn by a tyre from Barguil.

The last-place stroke of inhumanity was reserved for the young Breton, who created his arm in the air, and was immediately employed live on French television with the interviewer predicting his win even as the photo finish was consulted. His tears were expected, but when they came, they were bitter ones of win, ending a daylight of merciless charm such as cycling only rarely produces.

Stage nine solutions

Rigoberto Uran( Colombia/ Cannondale) 5:07: 22 2. Warren Barguil( France/ Sunweb) ST 3. Chris Froome( Britain/ Team Sky) 4. Romain Bardet( France/ AG2R) 5. Fabio Aru( Italy/ Astana) 6. Jakob Fuglsang( Denmark/ Astana) 7. George Bennett( New Zealand/ LottoNL) +1:15 8. Mikel Landa( Spain/ Team Sky) 9. Daniel Martin( Ireland/ Quick-Step) 10. Nairo Quintana( Colombia/ Movistar) 11. Simon Yates( Britain/ Orica) 12. Tiesj Benoot( Belgium/ Lotto) +3:32 13. Mikel Nieve( Spain/ Team Sky) 14. Louis Meintjes( South Africa/ UAE Team Emirates) 15. Pierre Latour( France/ AG2R) +4:19 16. Alexis Vuillermoz( France/ AG2R) 17. Sergio Henao( Colombia/ Team Sky) 18. Damiano Caruso( Italy/ BMC Racing) 19. Primoz Roglic( Slovenia/ LottoNL) 20. Alberto Contador( Spain/ Trek) 21. Bauke Mollema( Netherlands/ Trek) +4:50 22. Jan Bakelants( Belgium/ AG2R) +6:17 23. Daniel Navarro( Spain/ Cofidis) 24. Emanuel Buchmann( Germany/ BORA) +7:13 25. Carlos Betancur( Colombia/ Movistar) 26. Brice Feillu( France/ Fortuneo) +8:07 27. Tony Gallopin( France/ Lotto) 28. Jarlinson Pantano( Colombia/ Trek)

General classification

Chris Froome( Britain/ Team Sky) 38:26: 28 2. Fabio Aru( Italy/ Astana) +18 3. Romain Bardet( France/ AG2R) +51 4. Rigoberto Uran( Colombia/ Cannondale) +55 5. Jakob Fuglsang( Denmark/ Astana) +1:37 6. Daniel Martin( Ireland/ Quick-Step) +1:44 7. Simon Yates( Britain/ Orica) +2:02 8. Nairo Quintana( Colombia/ Movistar) +2:13 9. Mikel Landa( Spain/ Team Sky) +3:06 10. George Bennett( New Zealand/ LottoNL) +3:53

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