#I am TRYING to get the THINGS but I CANT because it’s layer above/below me and I don’t know how to reach it

[iwoulddieforienzo]

Genshin stop designing layered worlds challenge

Genshin stop having so many goddamn collectibles challenge

GENSHIN STOP TYING WORLD EXPLORATION TO HOURS LONG QUESTS CHALLENGE

[omiscurls]

Lady and The Tramp - sakusa kiyoomi x reader

well hi! It’s been a while since I wrote one of those, huh?

so obviously the volleyball player you’re gonna fall for today is sakusa kiyoomi

the word count: around 2K 

summary: your boyfriend and you go for a winter walk with his dog, and he gets a bit nostalgic. 

and let’s go!

The sun shines a little bit different every season of the year. The winter sun is a tad bit more harsh and refreshing that the slow, dripping summer mornings. And as you look at the white, glistening snow, and the cold sun rays shining directly at it, you just have the urge to go out and do something with yourself, don’t you?

Same struggles happened in Sakusa Kiyoomi’s head that very morning when he woke up to a cold apartament drowning in sun rays, causing him to put a hand over his eyes, to cover them from the merciless light.

“Did I forget to turn the heaters on again?” He whined, and cursed his need to open windows before going to sleep each night. Now it was almost impossible for him to get out of the sheets, considering the temperature in his room was way below zero.

He managed to get one arm outside the warm bed and reached for his phone, charging on the side table. A sight of you in his MSBY shirt, sat on a kitchen counter and showing something you just baked, with a proud grin on your face on his wallpaper greeted him, and the widget above your head told him that it was six in the morning.

So he woke up before his alarm? Impressive, given that it was a Saturday and no practice was planned. He had exactly thirty two minutes before his phone would tell him to “get his ass out of bed” and go for a run.

Sighing, he threw the phone away on the mattrace, and wrapping his blanket around him, he went over to the window.

It snowed last night.

Wait, it snowed last night?

Suddenly, he was a little kid inside, because oh gosh, it never snowed these days! It was all looking so nice, everything covered in a white layer, as if it wasn’t the outside of his apartment, but a picture taken from a children’s book.

After he almost jumped from excitement, the adult side of his has taken over. If it snowed, it meant the temperature went below zero. If it went below zero, the sidewalk would be so slippery that running would be almost impossible.

Well, screw it. He wasn’t going to let a tad little detail like that ruin his good mood. And so he went over to each radiator he had and turned it on, then going to bed again and scrolling through his social media until the temperature around was warm enough for him to leave the sheets. 

And so it took a couple of hours for him to finally get himself up and going, but it was still fairly early when you knocked on the door of his apartment, and heard some shuffling inside.

“Sit already, would you? Fine, okay, I know you’re excited, but-“ your boyfriend’s voice was cut off by a bark, and he was silent for a second, while on the other side of the door, you were barely holding in your laugh.

“Hey! Behave! No!” he raised his voice ever so slightly, but apparently it worked on the poor dog, because soon enough you saw him, leant against the doorframe with both his hands in his pockets, his pet sitting beside him, although almost jumping from excitement upon seeing someone else.

“Oh, didn’t expect you here today” he said nonchalantly, a smirk forming on his lips, as he knew well that he invited you here himself. You rolled your eyes, and passed him by, leading yourself to his bathroom. “Not even a hello?” he whined jokingly, as you shook your head.

“I was in a public bus, let me go wash my hands” you explained, and he nodded, mentally trying to convince himself that’s just something people do. You’re not doing it just for him.

He followed you to the bathroom and once again stood in the door, looking at you with a happy spark in his eyes.

You looked so in place while just casually standing anywhere in his apartament. Like you belonged there. And he was almost certain you indeed, did belong there. He wouldn’t have you any other place, rather than by his side.

“You should really get a license already” he said, quickly looking down at his nails, so you wouldn’t see him stare.

“Mhm” you agreed silently, wiping your hands “I know” you slowly approached him, firstly playing with the material of his shirt, and after a while, curling his hair on your finger. It required staying on your tippy toes, which he found endearing. “And you, sir, are due for a haircut”

“Am I?” he said, touching his curls himself, but not leaving you to check in the mirror. “Can you do it?”

You giggled.

That was kinda part of the plan, since he absolutely loved hearing you laugh. He wasn’t the most funny person on earth, yet he was motivated to become a full comedian just to hear that genuine chuckle you gave his finest jokes.

„I cant cut your hair, silly” you said, rubbing his temple with one finger as you were still playing with the pitch black curls. “You have to go to a salon”

He shivered theatrically, rolling his eyes at you and walking away towards the kitchen. “And here I thought you loved me” he huffed, making you smile in disbelief.

“You’re being a baby!”

“I’ll ask my sister to do it”

“Your sister lives kinda away, you’re aware of that, right?” you continued, following his steps to the bigger room, where he was sitting on the floor and tying his shoes.

“So? She loves me, she’ll do it”

“She has her own kid to take care of, she doesn’t need a twenty two year old one” you shoot back, remembering the last family reunion you attended with your boyfriend. It was a complete mess, but meeting his parents explained... a whole lot of things about his character. 

He really did look like a little kid, reaching for another one of his sneakers, scarf already put half on around his neck, smiling softly, having to pause the process of tying his shoes every time his dog tried to lick his face in excitement. The poorly named Swiss Setter never left your boyfriend’s side whenever he was home, so used to his their very own slow lifestyle. 

You knew damn well she was emotionally attached to her owner, and loved him dearly, as you were the one to babysit her whenever Kiyoomi had an out of town game, and the first couple of times she didn’t sleep at all, and neither did you. It required him staying overnight at your place together with the dog for her to understand it’s a safe place. 

“Now now, calm down, Lady, at least let me tie my shoes!” he giggled childishly. The first time you ever saw him snuggled up on the couch with the dog, watching some crappy Netflix show, you couldn’t believe your eyes. 

THE Kiyoomi Sakusa. On the couch. With a dog. 

You soon found out that Lady, because that’s the crappy name the dog so proudly got by, had been one of your boyfriend’s only friends until the time he graduated. She wasn’t exactly a rescue dog, but his older brother brought her home from his former friend’s house, where she didn’t exactly had the best start in life. 

Kiyoomi didn’t fall in love at first sight, he needed time to adjust to having a dog in the house, but Lady seemed very fond of him, and weirdly enough, only listened to his commands. (The trainer said it’s about his voice, as it is deep and raspy, when he says something loudly enough, she feels respect towards him). 

He was soon in charge of training the dog to be a good pet for a household such as the Sakusas place, a huge, always so elegant and spotless house, where no one is around too often, but frankly, “family friends” came back every other night to drink rosé with his mother, or whisky with his father. 

It was to no one’s surprise, that when Kiyoomi moved away and went to college, his porcelain doll of a mother and distant father couldn’t get a hold of the Swiss Setter, who’s manners weren’t so ladylike. The deal was simple, either kiyoomi takes her to his place, or she ends up in a shelter. 

And as he loved dogs, and secretly had a heart of a four-year-old, he took her in with himself, and, frankly, let her rule over his at-home life all the time. 

She was very well behaved when in public, knew what was on her owner’s mind by the look in his eyes and reacted on the snaps of his fingers, but inside the four walls of his apartment, she could walk all over him, which you found amusing. 

Kiyoomi put her on her leash, and rose his eyebrow at you. 

“Coming?” he asked, having the door opened for you already. You nodded and left, waiting for him to lock the door behind the three of you. 

It was cold outside, but not too cold, and the air was refreshing, even in such a city as Osaka is. Kiyoomi mindlessly tied his pinky with yours, a bit of a hard thing to do in leather gloves, but he was all about the details. 

After two years of your relationship, he was perfectly capable of holding your hand just fine, but sentimentally enough opted to hold your pinky instead, as if your romance was fresh once again. 

You smiled at the feeling and squeezed his pinky back with yours, You glanced over at him staring at his feet, as you walked towards the park in comfortable silence. 

“When do you have the next match, Omi?” you started a casual conversation, and he looked as if you took him out of a trans of sorts. 

“Oh, uhm, next Friday” he answered upsentmindedly. You caught him sparing loving glances in Lady’s direction, an indescribable nostalgy painting his face in cold colors. 

When you reached the entrance to the huge park, where dogs were allowed off leash, you bent over and made a snowball, the throwing it at his back. He turned around to face you and gave you a look of betrayal. 

“You didn’t” he whispered. 

“I think I did” you giggled, covering your mouth with your hands, waiting for his next move. 

He bit back a smirk, trying to remain stoic as he kneeled down to release Lady off her leash, hiding it in the pocket of his black coat, then picking up snow in his hands and forming a round snowball, directing it right at you. 

Lady kept running around the two of you, jumping in excitement, not fully understanding what you’re doing, but happy to be a part of it. 

“Hey, ouch!” you laughed, theatrically covering the shoulder it reached. “You didn’t need to spike it!” 

There weren’t many people at the park that day, considering the fact that it was first snow, and parents don’t usually bring kids, who want to build snowmen, to a park where dogs are allowed off leash. 

“Oh, you wanna see a spike?” a little smile covered his lips, exposing his blushing cheeks, contrasting with the rest of his pale face, and dark curls. 

“Try me, pretty boy” 

“Aight” he put his hands up in an agreeing gesture “Just don’t whine about the bruises later” 

“Same goes to you” 

He huffed, getting back as he gathered snow in his hands and rolled it a bit before aiming at you, jumping in place as you tried to “become a harder target to hit”. He shook his head in disbelief. 

God, I love that dork, he thought, purposely frowning and posing as if he was about to serve. 

Lady kept jumping around him, noticing a round object in his hand. 

“This is not for you, dummy” he laughed, but noticing her excitement, excitement that he didn’t get to see a lot recently, since she was visibly getting older, and more tired, a warm feeling flooded over his chest. He sighed. “Alright, you want it? You want it?” he kept teasing, making her jump around, before breaking the ball and rubbing the snow in her fur.  

She layed down on her back, showing her tummy for pets, which he did obviously provide, tickling that one spot that made her move her leg uncontrollably. 

He got up, and formed another snowball, showing it to her. 

“Watch out, I’m throwing it!” he said to her, before aiming at some free space far from him, throwing the ball from behind his back, watching with a heartwarming smile as she ran after it. 

He seemed to have forgotten about defeating you, watching as his dog kept digging for the “ball” that already disappeared in the snow, so you walked back up to him. 

“You okay?” you asked softly, and he looked at you in surprise. 

“Yeah, obviously” he responded, but something seemed off. You tangled your arms around his shoulder, smushing your cheek against it, and looking at Lady sniffing around the place the snowball landed. “You know, if it weren’t for her, I’d still be too anxious to pet dogs I like when I’m on walks” he started, his mind some place else. 

“Well, many things wouldn’t have happened if it weren’t for her. We probably wouldn’t have met!” you smiled against the fabric of the thick coat, both of you remembering that sunny afternoon when you sat by the river in the park, reading some sort of upsetting news on your phone, frowning, tears forming in the corners of your eyes, when suddenly, you flinched, seeing a snoot between your arms, and when you parted it, you saw a panting, big dog staring back at you. You heard a distressed  “Oh my god, Lady! Come back here!” in the distance, and you lifted your eyes to see a tall like a tower twenty-year old, black curls swept away from his face with hairgel, but getting a bit in the way due to the wind, the guy wearing black t-shirt, with a golden logo, of what appeared to be a... fox? You then thought, only later discovering it’s actually a Jackal, and the letters B and J on the sides of it, and sporty shorts. Apparently, they were on a run. 

“I’m so, so sorry, she never does that. Please don’t get too mad at her, she means no harm! Oh, my god, Lady, come back here!” he hissed, putting the dog back on a leash. “I’m sorry! Hey, I can buy you a coffee, if that’ll make up for her? I’m choosing the coffee shop though, there’s a little one nearby and there’re not too many people in it, the popular ones are a rip off anyway, wait— are you crying?” he panted out, staring directly at your face, with a deadpan look.

“It’s alright, I like dogs. But I like coffee, too”

You smiled upon remembering that afternoon, as the completely different sun shined on you two in that moment, not the exhausting, August-ish one, that makes you want to never leave the nearest pool, but a cool and refreshing February one. Two years passed, and the both of you weren’t just strangers in the park, you were one of these cheesy couples teenage girls look at and get upset because they think they’re never going to be like that with anyone. Although, the bonding dog stayed the same. 

Speaking of Lady, she ran up to Kiyoomi, who was lost in his thoughts and memories, proudly showing off a stick she must’ve found under the snow at some point. 

“Look what you got there!” he kneeled down, trying to get it away from her to throw it. “My good girl” he giggled. 

Some February afternoons could just last forever.

[mikeshanlon]

psst share your outer banks coloring secrets

ah, yes, one of the worst shows to color lmaoooo. i'll try to give some tips but im sure as anyone who has tried to color this show knows each scene is diff and has it's own flavor of awful yellow/green/red shading.

some tips on how to go from this to this......

............under the cut! (warning v long and idk if i'm the best at explaining things lmao)

so firstly, i use this psd i made ages ago for everything (alecbaenes was my url many moons ago i just am too lazy to change and reupload). usually i will go into each individual layer of that psd and see how they work with the scene, and will change the opacity or turn off the layer depending on what looks best. generally for obx, i will lower the opacity on the gradient map layer, as well as certain vibrancy/curves/levels layers, ones that make the gif brighter and more vibrant. i will usually bring back some vibrancy and brightness later but when im first getting the base coloring, some layers just heighten the yellow/red and we need to kinda bring that down before we make adjustments to get aspects like skin color more accurate.

so, just with my psd/adjustments made to the psd layers, the gif may looks something like this: (going to use this gif bc i made it more recently so i remember some of the stuff i did better, and is the most accurate to my current process--plus it sucks to color lmao)

ususally still way to red/yellow for my liking, both for the skin tones and to be able to manipulate the colors for a vibrant coloring! so the next step is to get colors as close to how they are normally. warning, you will have to make 345435354 adjustment layers and just keep tweaking and tweaking... and tweaking. sometimes i will have like 20+ adjustment layers at the end of the process. i usually put all my adjustments under my psd--i also always add a vibrance and brightness layer above. sometimes it helps to do final tweaks above the psd if you just cant get anything right bc of course the psd will change how colors normally look.

anyways, usually my base fixes will be some sort of combination of curves, levels, color balance, and selective color. so like, if the gif needs more depth/darkness, or is way too bright, i will bring the curve down or up respectively. levels, and also increasing the black selective color layer will also add depth. i will also use auto curve sometimes! the first image i have below i circled some of the extra tools i may use--auto for auto curves, the top black eyedropper you select the darker points in your gif and it will adjust based on that, the bottom one for the lightest--if i use those i will either use the black one only, or the black and then the white. the other three are examples of how my curve layers may look--i already have S curves in my psd, so when i do extra curve adjustments, it's just one single point, and i don't move it that much. same with levels, i dont make a super dramatic change, when it's under the psd it's enough to just move a bit to make a big difference. sometimes i'll also bring these layers to a lower opacity.

generally my first step is color balance though, especially if the gif seems mostly fine lighting wise. for obx, i usually shift it towards cyan and blue to cancel out the red tones. magenta and green depends, if its more green i may move towards magenta and vice versa, but usually i dont shift it that dramatically and often leave it alone. i will usually move the bottom bar towards blue, to soften the yellow tones. color balance helps shift the overall colors of the gif. notice that it's on mid tones in these pictures:

as you can see, i shift the cyan/red one more dramatically than the yellow/blue, and with magenta and green i usually just move it 1-3 points over. in the last one, i actually shifted towards red above my psd layer, because after all my adjustments i lost some of the red/warmth, so i brought back in red.

with color balance/curves, the gif may looks something like this

less of a completely red/yellow filter over everything! but still not great, their skin is too red, and overall still not the best base to try colorings. so next up is selective color, which can really help you fine tune things, but because of that.... SUUUUPER tedious. i will have 3495874 selective color layers and sometimes like 5 of them will be half canceling each other out just to get something okay. but this is a hobby i've chosen so we must suffer LKRGJRG. generally, my realm revolves around red, yellow, and at times magenta or neutral. if you think back to how we fixed some of the colors with color balance, kind of a similar principle, just with the individual colors. and lots of experimenting. so with color balance i would cancel out reds by making them more cyan--on the red selective color, im also gonna turn up the cyan. for yellow, i'm gonna make it more magenta, to make the yellow tones warmer. i will tweak the other tones too, just kinda experiment to see how changing it affects the gif, and then soon you will kind of intuitively know how to change the values based on whats going on in the gif lighting. magenta selective color helps for red values that are more pink, so make them more red or yellow based on what you need--i don't use this as much, hence i didnt have an example in the crop of psds i opened, but it's helpful sometimes. with neutral selective color, it usually affects the whole gif, so again, only minimal changes--usually i will bring the black levels down if it got to bright, or add just a tinge or yellow or cyan or whatever i need. here's some pics to show examples of what mine looked like for this gif:

there were many more, but i just chose a few. the '1' and '2' i wrote to demonstrate that these layers were sequential, how they balance each other, and how selective color can be a tedious balancing act-- the second example it's like basically the opposite but it balances it out. also, if you have two characters with different skin tones, or the lighting is different for them, etc, you can use layer masks to erase certain adjustments so it only affects one of the subjects. some of these tweaks will be inbetween me transforming the gif to be colorful, and noticing how the colors interact, etc. so between this i was also making it colorful and it's not exactly the finished product at this stage: but this is kind of what the gif would look like after all the adjustments just to get it looking... normalish:

not totally perfect but MUCH better, and also will look a little different when surrounded by the colors i want to turn it into. i have some stuff about how i color in this tag, i can do a lil other tutorial or smth if needed but bc i have limited photo space on the ask and already wrote so much i wont get super into it here. but for shows like obx, it helps to work with a group of colors that will work with the show--yellows/oranges are easier bc of all the yellow already found in the show. pinks can be harder because there is so much yellow in the show, but doable. greens are good because of all the green in the show, and thus blues are good because its easy to go from green to blue with selective color and stuff. thus, purples are good too because its easy to go from blue to purple! stuff like that makes it easier. some work with selective color, hue and saturation, gradients, and voila!

you can see how maybe some of the issues like it being still a little too yellow/greeny toned balances out with the surrounding colors.

also, a big part of it is just practice! i've been giffing for yeaaaaaars and with media that has just the most god awful lighting so i've gotten good at understanding what to do and sometimes i'm just on auto pilot.

hopefully that helped, i know it was long winded and it can be hard to explain/understand photoshop. if y'all want some more in depth explanation about a part of the process i can try, or with other examples!

[youarerageandserenity]

Borderlands Foam Wig Tutorial (Tyreen)

I was chatting with the lovely @void-noises-exe​ and it eventually circled around to offering to make a wig tutorial because you don’t see too terribly many, just thought I’d throw mine out ( especially because It was next to impossible to find good references of a foam version of Ty’s hair.) So this will be for foam wigs in general but Tyreen’s hair specifically (with a few pics of my Fiona wig from tales as well because they better accentuate my points) I didn’t plan on making this so I am missing a few pictures that might be helpful but here we go. This will not be short.

Supplies: 

-Craft foam (ideally, in small and XL sheets, but you can make do with whatever size you have available) 

- Spray paint as close to the BASE color of the wig you need (for Ty I used white, for Fiona a medium brown) ideally in a matte. 

- a FUCKLOAD of paints (i use cheap acrylics from the craft store ) in Black, and then several shades of the colors in the hair. (For Fiona i used i think four browns? Tyreens shaved sides have three browns, and the top had an additional yellow-brown i mixed) try to vary them in darkness levels to add depth.

- multiple paint brushes. I like to use around four or five of varying sizes and hardness levels.

- plenty Hot glue, and a hot glue gun (note: you COULD use other typres of adhesive, I like hot glue because its got great hold on foam, it sets FAST and worst case scenario I can take a hair dryer to it and melt it again if I need something to be undone.)

- scissors

- duct tape

-plastic wrap

-sharpie

-wig head

-Plenty of reference images

(optional supplies include a rotary cutter and or exacto-knife [trust me, itll make your life so much easier] ,  and patience. )

SO to start

1) Put your hair in a wig cap or however you plan on wearing it under your wig. Wrap your whole hair bit of your head in plastic wrap. Make sure you get over your ears and the baby hairs on your neck if you want to keep them. 

2) Wrap all the plastic covered bits in duct tape. This is easier for a friend to do on you, but not impossible to do alone, just make sure to get it all. It should be snug. Make sure you get as far down the back of your neck and down your sideburn area as you can. (Most characters have a bit of fringe hanging down in the back so its not the BIGGEST concern for them, but Ty’s got nada so you’re gonna want some good coverage for your hair line.) 

3) Take your sharpie and draw an outline of where your ear is, and along the hairline you’d like your wig to have. For short haired characters you dont want to cut too far behind the ear or your hair will peek out, so I like to underestimate how big my ear is and adjust as needed later. Dont make your wig hairline too high either, particularly if you’re making a wig for a character who has no fringe in the front. 

4) Take that bad boy off and cut along your outlines. Try it on again, adjust lines as needed. rinse and repeat. 

5) once you reach a semi-accurate mold of your head, you’re gonna wanna take it off and cut AT LEAST 4 (front, back, and both sides (I like to do 8, it will lay flatter) sections,coming to a point at the crown of your head. It should come out looking something like this. NOTE : they’re all still connected in the middle. If you’re doing 8, cut each of these 4 in half. )

6) Lay out your foam beneath this. If you dont have a piece of foam big enough to trace this bad boy onto, what I do is literally just break out the hot glue gun a bit early, glue a couple pieces together along the edges, until i get a nice big connected surface. Trace this guy on there as accurately as you can, cut it out, and then glue all your sides together. Now you should have a foam version of your duct tape hat. 

(Dont worry if the sides wont stay down, if you’re doing a character like Ty where thats an issue, we’ll get to that part later. ) 

7) (Optional but VERY helpful) Grab your wig head, and your duct tape head. Tape the duct tape back together and put something in it to make it hold shape, I use poly-fil. Tape the head-form to the wig head, and put your little foam cap on top of that. 

8)  Time to get creative. You’re gonna want to start from the bottom layers first. For Tyreen that’s the long fringe and her undercut. The strategy I decided on was to take a few large rectangular strips of foam, and lay them out everywhere I wanted the undercut to be and cut along the edges to match the hairline. I don’t have a picture of this exact point in the process but I have one from the beginning of the next step. Really the only thing to note at this point is obviously, your head is round and rectangles are not, for the curves where it sticks up along the edges, cut down where it sticks up in a little triangle and hot glue the ends together (you can sort of see this at the top left in the picture below). Dont worry about seams at this point, we’ll hide them later. 

9) This was not the case for Fiona who has very flat hair ( especially because of her hat) but Tyreen has a lot of volume especially towards the front of her head. For hair pieces that need volume, such as the ones that are glued down here, cut two of the exact same foam piece (i like to do them in little waves like the side, but also just a little arch is good for volume without flips such as the front piece) and glue the matching edges together. Make sure the hair triangle is facing the way youd like it to! Then Flatten out the top as much as you can, the bottom will keep the volume and the top ill be able to be covered by “2D” hair pieces. 

(NOTE: Honestly, it’s REALLY difficult to end up with an exact copy of cannon, and I ALLLLWAYS get carried away with the spikes. In the end, go by your reference images, but also follow your heart. Cosplay is half about having fun creating. )

10) Once youve started gluing, make sure to keep in mind where your part is (if you have one). For Fiona i didn’t trust myself so I glued in the hair at the part BEFORE anything, and left them ready to be glued down while I worked my way up to them. 

NOTE: All the hair at the parts of BOTH wigs is a single piece of foam.You want a nice wide base whenever possible to cover up the seams of all of the other edges of the hair. For your part, Carefully glue along the very end of your strip of foam and stick it down. It will be the last piece to be glueddown on top of everything else to make it look nice and clean. 

11) Slowly start working your way around the head, gluing down first anything that will need to be covered (3D pieces and bottom pieces) before getting towards the top where youll need to be more strategic about what is going down and what can cover your edges. I’d definitely recommend mixing 2D and 3D pieces if that’s something you want to experiment with, otherwise, such as in the pic below, it is possible to get volume from a 2D piece, simply by gluing it in a way where it wont lie flat against the head. 

12) in the picture above you can also catch a glimpse of Ty’s cow lick. Those are done exactly the same as our 3D pieces from before, only you trace the edges of the open end, and should end up with a triangular third side to be glued in, then just glue along the edges just like the hair part. 

13) Dont feel you have to overdo how many pieces the hair has, remember you may also paint in pieces and designs when it comes to the line-art! 

14) Once you’ve added everything from the bottom that you’d like to, go ahead and glue down your hair-part. 

15) So, obviously, I wasn’t a big fan of Tyreen’s undercut just being flat foam across half my head. So I took an exacto to it for what felt like years. REALLY over-do it on the edges, it’ll get rid of that harsh foam line and give it a little more of a natural blend. Also pay special attention to all of your seams in the foam. The more distressing there is there, the less youll be able to spot lines later. 

16) So once you have the overall structure of your wig and you’re thinking you might be happy with this, its spray paint time. (I’d recommend disposable gloves for this, you’re gonna need to maneuver it every which way to get the pain in every cranny and that paint does NOT like to come off easy.)  Theres really not much advice I can offer on it, just be patient, and do a couple layers, spray it from every angle and let it dry completely before moving on to the next step unless youre as impatient as I am and dont mind ruining a few paintbrushes. 

17) So, like the Fiona pic a few back or this one here, you should have a fairly flat evenly painted foam sculpture. Now is around the time you might start seeing all the inaccuracies in what you’ve made. You gotta push past that it’ll look great I promise. Time to get really creative. 

18) for Ty I started by painting the buzzed bits in a base brown, and started in on the line art and her roots while i waited for it to dry before going in with two more colors of brown for depth. 

19) For her roots I ended up using three colors. Black at the very bottom (which blends into the line art) a dark brown that matches more or less the buzz, and then after the fact, a custom yellowed-brown to blend better into the white and give us a little more texture. For this and the rest of the cel-shading in the hair, dab your brush before painting and try to mostly stick to light strokes in one direction (OR: if you have one, a particularly hard bristled paint brush does wonders for this) you don’t want the ends of your strokes to be too defined. 

20) Outline the edges of the hair and all prominent pieces, particularly the hot-glue seams, itll make them less noticable. (dont forget the little animation squiggles for Ty’s sides) and beyond that-- honestly, black out to your hearts content. These pics are from when I thought I’d finished. I really felt I’d over detailed. The next day I looked at a picture and realized there is always WAY more texture and outlining than I feel like I see. Honestly, you cant really over-do it, especially with fine solid black lines. 

21) The next day I came back at it with the yellowed-brown and LOTS more solid black lines. (Currently in the process of taming down where I got too excessive with the spikes on the side) 

22) Once it’s all dried, time to try on. Here’s where we address if you have a short haired character, and the edges of your wig just wont stay down -- invest in a little theatrical grade spirit gum. It’s not too terribly expensive, and unfortunately, I tried the cheaper halloween makeup kind, and it just wont hold how you need it too (and please for my sake, also make sure you get spirit gum remover) I took some hair gel (you could also use elmers glue) just to glue up as much of my hair as I could on the sides and the back of my neck to keep them from the spirit gum, and dabbed it along all of the prominent edges of the wig (namely, side and back) wait for it to get a little tacky and stick that MF-er down good. 

Aaaaand Voila??? 

Let me know if I missed any steps? Its fairly simple, once you get going -- just time consuming. 

[nuggetisawesome]

Protect Your Browsing/Data Sharing

For free, because in this house I don’t believe in making people pay for basic human rights.

I’ve decided to share my browsing protecting tips here. Digital security is usually quite expensive, but it doesn’t have to be! In this day and age, you’ll be told to watch out for home-born hackers and ‘hacktivists’ accessing your data, but I gotta tell you, what your own governments and ISPs are doing makes this more important (aka: they’re worse). 

I know with all the TIKTOK IS SPYING ON YOU stuff, a lot of my friends have come to me seeking some advice on this. This is also great if you don’t want parents checking your browsing >_> just sayin’

If anyone has questions - drop me an ask! I’ll always answer for this topic. I am also happy to ‘expand’ on one of these suggestions if they’re unclear :) 

Note: This works under the assumption you have your default ISP provided router and can’t get another one for whatever reason. I will advise that if you can get an additional router, do so! Try to avoid the one the ISP has provided to you. 

Additional Note: This is not ‘optimal’. There is no such thing in security – everything has a backdoor. 

Let’s get cracking! This is a long, and thorough post, but I _do _have a pdf somewhere if you want it because it looks nicer :*) 

Use Tor to browse. 

There you go, there’s my advice leaves

https://support.torproject.org/ to Download/Install/Run.

Don’t change anything, except maybe using Tor in ‘bridge’ mode.

Okay, you can use other browsers (see: Chrome/Firefox), but they are not as secure as Tor.

USE A VPN IF YOU ARE GOING TO USE TOR! I prefer Firefox (extensions + good security)

________________________________________________________________

Install the following extensions if you have Chrome or Firefox:

Privacy Possum

Stops tracking cookies. PSA: Cookies are not evil, certain cookies can be.

Firefox:  https://addons.mozilla.org/nl/firefox/addon/privacy-possum/

Chrome: https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/privacy-possum/ommfjecdpepadiafbnidoiggfpbnkfbj

Ghostery

Stops tracking adverts and cookies. Why do I need this in addition to Privacy Possum? Ghostery specifically looks at tracking cookie ads. It’s like adding MOAR POWAH to Privacy Possum.

Firefox: https://addons.mozilla.org/nl/firefox/addon/ghostery/

Chrome: https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/ghostery-%E2%80%93-privacy-ad-blo/mlomiejdfkolichcflejclcbmpeaniij?hl=nl

HTTPS Everywhere

Enforces HTTPS. If you look next to the URL in your browser, you’ll see the little lock which indicates the specific URL is secure and uses HTTPS. Many websites still use the old HTTP, which is not as secure and you should NEVER EVER VISIT AN HTTP SITE ITS LIKE READING A BOOK OVER SOMEONE’S SHOULDER, thank you.

Firefox: https://addons.mozilla.org/nl/firefox/addon/https-everywhere/

Chrome: https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/https-everywhere/gcbommkclmclpchllfjekcdonpmejbdp?hl=nl

Adblock Plus

Foff, ads.* Firefox: https://addons.mozilla.org/nl/firefox/addon/adblock-plus/

Chrome: https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/adblock-plus-free-ad-bloc/cfhdojbkjhnklbpkdaibdccddilifddb

________________________________________________________________

DNS Settings

Ideally, you should change this on your router. ISPs use a default DNS – you don’t want to use anything those bastards say you should use. 

Use Cloudflare or OpenDNS:

Cloudflare is more secure overall and keeps up to standards in addition to not storing your data, whereas OpenDNS is great at avoiding malicious websites, just take your pick really 😊There are a ton of other options, feel free to google ‘free DNS servers’. Google has it’s own as well, but, yaknow, it’s Google.

Cloudflare

Primary Server: 1.1.1.1

Secondary Server: 1.0.0.1

OpenDNS

Primary Server: 208.67.222.222

Secondary Server: 208.67.220.220

Add these to your router settings:

In a browser, go to http://192.168.1.1/ or http://192.168.1.0/ (it varies per router). This will lead to your router’s configuration portal. Don’t have a router with a configuration portal? Throw it in the trash and tell your ISP they suck for giving it to you.

Login to the admin portal. If you have not configured this or set a password, try the default combinations: usernames are usually ‘admin’ or blank, the passwords are usually blank, ‘admin’, or ‘1234’.

Each router is different, navigate to where it asks for DNS values or servers, and enter the above addresses. You will see ‘Static’ near the DNS options, select it. This also ensures you’re in the right place. If you’re not sure what to do, look up the model/make of your router and check how you can change DNS.

Whilst you’re at it, change your WiFi password from the default one, and create a proper password for the WiFi portal login. If these two things are kept as default, all these protection methods are pointless as it is easy to crack your router passwords.

Can’t do this on your router because your parents are ds?* No worries! This can be done on your device! :) Yeah, I know how parents work. 

Windows OS

Go to Control Panel <Network and Internet < Network and Sharing Center

Click on the link next to “Connections:”* Click “Properties” in the dialogue that pops up.

Select Internet Protocol Version 4 < Click Properties < Select “Use Following DNS Servers” < Enter the primary and secondary server addresses

Do this again for Internet Protocol Version 6 in the list.

Boom. Windows is so nice to make this easy.

Mac OS

Go to Apple Menu < System Preferences < Network

Select the Network you’re connected to

Click Advanced

Select DNS Tab

Click the + button < Enter chosen DNS < Save

Linux OS

I’m going to assume if you’re using Linux, you know how to use the terminal and are using a modern Linux system. Enter these line by line. There are many ways to do this (Google is your friend)

·        sudo apt update

·        sudo apt install resolvconf

·        sudo systemctl status resolvconf.service (check that it is running)

·        sudo systemctl start resolvconf.service (to start it, use ‘enable’ instead of ‘start’ to enable)

·        sudo nano /etc/resolvconf/resolv.conf.d/head

·        nameserver YOUR.DNS.ADDRESS.HERE

·        nameserver YOUR.SECOND.DNS.ADDRESS.HERE

·        sudo systemctl start resolvconf.service

Android

Oh yeah, you can do this on phones too wiggles eyebrows. Note, if you’re using a VPN it will lock you out of editing this. Turn it off, edit your DNS, turn it back on. This can be tricky with mobile devices that have not been jailbroken (I don’t advise doing that if you have no clue what you’re doing).

Go to Settings < Connections < WiFi

Select the gear icon next to your current WiFi

Select Advanced < Ip Settings drop-down < Static

Enter chosen DNS options under “DNS 1” and “DNS 2”

iPhone

Go to Settings < Wi-Fi

Select the arrow button next to your current WiFi

Select DHCP tab, scroll down to DNS

Select DNS, and enter your DNS servers

TEST YOUR DNS IS WORKING:

OpenDNS: https://welcome.opendns.com/ (You’ll see a “Welcome to OpenDNS” message”

Cloudflare: https://www.cloudflare.com/ssl/encrypted-sni/ (You’ll see check marks for all fields)

________________________________________________________________

Turn of WPS on router. Enable encryption on router.

If you can access your router portal, find any sort of toggle or field that says “WPS” and disable it. WPS= bad.  

Wherever there is an option for WPA2 (or higher) to enable, enable it.

Enable the firewall on your router and Operating System – ALWAYS. If you disable this, you’re disabling an additional layer of security. Firewalls are confusing things and a royal pain in the ass to configure, but having the default is better than having nothing.

________________________________________________________________

Configure your browsers. 

Browsers have most things enabled by default, including tracking your location, turning your microphone on etc. Let’s disable that nonsense and make them ask you for permission because it’s 2020.

I’m using Chrome as an example below because it is INFAMOUS for this. Essentially, go through your browser and scroll through settings you don’t like.

Go to the little menu icon < select “Settings”

Sign out if it’s linked to your Google account. Let’s not give Chrome a reason to track your browsing history for your account >_>* Disable EVERYTHING:

Here, I turned off everything I would find annoying except autocomplete because I’m lazy.

NICE TRY GOOGLE, YOU CANT SAVE MY CREDIT CARD. (Seriously, don’t ever EVER autosave passwords/payment info).

The trick is to balance ease of use with security. These may vary from person to person, in general though, if there’s a setting ‘ask before etc.’ select that over ‘allow’. 

As a rule of thumb:

NEVER ENABLE FLASH (not even an  ‘ask before’), NEVER ENABLE LOCATION (ask before is fine, but at your own risk), NEVER ENABLE CAMERA (ask before is fine, but at your own risk, use the desktop version of an application over the browser version), NEVER ENABLE MICROPHONE (same as camera)

________________________________________________________________

Additional Tipss

Check every single social media setting. You should disable anything that accesses your privacy, if possible.

Cover your camera with a sticker. Disable it unless it’s needed

Disable your mic unless you need it.

Turn off Bluetooth/NFC when you don’t need it.

Have two separate networks/Wi-Fi for smart devices and personal devices.

Always use two/multi-factor-authentication for every single app, site, device etc. that you can.

Biometrics are preferable and the usual chosen default (fingerprints, retina scan, NOT FACE OR VOICE THIS IS SO EASY TO IMMITATE BRO PICTURES ARE A THING)

SMS (try to avoid if you can, please)

App ‘token’ authentication. A good choice if done well.

Hard physical key or token. The best option (Google: Yubikey, for some information on how this works).

Passwords

I know you use the same password for everything – get a centralized password manager, and start using different ones. Examples include PasswordSafe, Keeper, Bitdefender etc. Try go for a Cloud provider, and pay a little bit for the extra security and backup. If they’re compromised, then you will know, and you’ll be able to change everything. You can tie password managers to a token too.

USE PASSPHRASES, 17 characters is a good average length, use a mix of characters, uppercase, lowercase, numbers, ascii etc.

It doesn’t matter if your password is ‘complex’, it matters if it is complex and long. Servers and computers these days are jacked up on tech steroids and can bruteforce many things, given enough time.

Anti-virus.

EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE ONE, ON EVERY DEVICE. If you have a device that can add AV, add it. This goes for phones, PCs, smartTVs, you name it. 

Free versions are okay, some free ones I like are Bitdefender, Kaspersky, McAfee, Avast (hate their fihsfirstg89ewjg9srjgrd ads though).

Sorry Mac users, that belief that you don’t need one is from 2008. Windows has more security built in than Mac, which means Mac devices should 100% make sure they are adding an AV. 

VPN

Ahhhhh. The great VPN. A tricky one. Most free versions I find incredibly slow, but give them a try – play around! A VPN is an excellent addition and these days, I’d argue it’s an absolute must. Many AV solutions include a VPN package with their deal. If you want to make sure those sites don’t share your data, this is the thing that will hurt the most - a good VPN will make it a jumbled mess. 

Updates - just do them.

There is no complete security in this day and age – it really is just a matter of time. If you use social media, you’re traceable, be it by the company, ISP, some bored 10 year old, or your ex, your data is out there circulating. Once it’s on the internet, it’s there forever, so don’t worry too much and try to make sure it’s all complex binary trash so that they open it and go “WTF” 😊

[greyias]

FIC: By the Guidance of Stars - Chapter 8

Title: By the Guidance of Stars Fandom: SWTOR Pairing: Theron Shan/f!Jedi Knight Rating: T (this chapter) Genre: Angst, H/C, Romance, Humor Synopsis: The Coalition tries to heal in the aftermath of the Battle of Yavin 4, but not every wound is physical. A series of missing scenes set during the end of Shadow of Revan. Warnings: See Chapter 1. Author’s Note: Last of the previously posted chapters, although this version has been revised to adjust for canon and some other things that bugged me.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Crossposted to AO3

As twilight gave way to night, the oppressive humidity eased into a slightly uncomfortable mugginess, but the breeze atop the crumbling platform chased through the open crevices in Theron’s jacket, making him almost cold. It was absolutely wonderful, and he didn’t know why anyone ever came down from this place if this was the alternative to drowning in their own sweat in the main camp. Of course, his reasons for extending his stay up on the high vantage point might have been more than just escaping the uncomfortable jungle swelter. Everyone would be departing Yavin tomorrow and going their separate ways. The moment his head hit the pillow, tomorrow would come, and with it, farewells.

Until then, he had the night.

Theron had no idea what was going on with him. His chest felt light, like it might float away and take the rest of his body with it at any moment. It was almost like being drunk, without having to take shots from any of the flasks traveling around camp. He would have suspected someone had snuck something in the evening meal, except none of it had started until he had gotten up onto the platform. Part of him wanted to run far, far away until this temporary madness passed, and the other part of him just wanted to sweep his companion off her feet and just disappear into her embrace until the stars went cold, any onlookers be damned. Neither of those options made any logical sense, so instead he flopped down at the edge of the platform and let his legs dangle over the precipice. The feeling of nothingness meeting his feet and staring at the several hundred foot drop into the jungle below set his heart pumping and he leaned forward to try and find the bottom.

Apparently that was one step too far, because the action gained a startled shout. “What are you doing?”

He tossed a look back at the fretting Jedi. “Sitting. It’s fun.”

“What if you fall?”

He shot her a boyish grin. “Then you’ll catch me.”

She huffed and crossed her arms. “With what? The Force?”

“I’ll let you figure out the details if it comes to that.”

“You have an awful lot of faith in my abilities to prevent you from doing something stupid.”

“You haven’t let me down yet.”

The sigh she let out was exasperated, but even in the darkness he could make out the corners of her lips twitching as she tried to repress a smile. “Why do you make a habit of being so reckless?”

“Because it’s fun.” He pat the open space next to him in invitation. “It’s a nice view. Why don’t you come over here and see?” 

She crossed her arms, canting her hip at an angle. “And what if I fall?”

He met her stubborn irritation with a warm smile. “Then I’ll catch you.”

Grey shuffled forward a few steps, possibly without thinking about it, because she stopped with a sudden jerk and stared at him suspiciously. “And what if we both fall?”

“Well, then,” he leaned back on one palm, craning his neck so he could watch her every reaction in the starlight, “at least we’d be falling together. I’m sure between the two of us we’d figure something out.”

“You are impossible,” she muttered, but slid in next to him. 

Gingerly she extended one leg off the edge, fist curled into what was probably a white knuckled grip under those gloves. He took pity on her, and extended his hand. She eyed it for a moment, before grasping it firmly and flinging the other leg off the edge dramatically. Her nod to him was defiant, even as her fingers formed a vice around his hand.

“See? Isn’t this nice?” he asked.

“It would be nicer with a railing.”

“That’d take out half the fun.” He lightly kicked her foot with his, earning a glare. “You don’t get an adrenaline rush if you know you can’t fall.”

“You don’t get enough of those while on the clock?”

“Do you?” he challenged.

In his mind’s eye, Theron could still see her blades twirling in a blur on on Tython. Could still feel the adrenaline pumping through his own veins as she risked her own life again and again with no hesitation. On Manaan. Rakata. Rishi. As innocent and proper an exterior she liked to present to the world, there was something wild and dangerous and irresistible lurking underneath that sweet facade. Someone a lot like himself. Just waiting for the right moment to burst forth.

“A Jedi doesn’t seek—“

He put a finger to her lips to stop the expected tirade, and leaned in a little closer. “I didn’t ask about a Jedi—I asked about you.” 

She frowned, leaning back just enough so his finger slipped down from her lips to rest against her chin. “Do you really think there’s a difference?”

Theron didn’t break her gaze, and just nodded ever so slightly with a soft hum of agreement. There was much more to her than the perfect little Jedi she kept trying to pretend to be. Too many layers and mysteries underneath the surface, and he wanted to peel back each one until she was laid bare before him. In every sense and meaning of the phrase.

Her fingers were still wrapped around his one hand like an anchor, and she let out a small huff as she glanced away. “We were talking about you, not me.”

“If you say so,” he said softly, and slowly leaned back into his own space.

The uncertain expression that flashed across her face was just as confusing as the strange fever that had overtaken him since he’d climbed up onto this platform. If he looked too deeply into any of this he’d probably descend into madness, or whatever the next step was after his current stage of mania. Her fingers loosened their death grip, and he let his hand drop back to the ground. She stared at it, lips pursed together as if she was trying to puzzle something out.

“I don’t always understand you,” she said after a moment. “You say one thing, but do another. Yet I don’t ever get the sense that you’re being dishonest with either.”

“Are you talking about anything in particular, or just in general?”

“I’m sorry.” She shook her head. “I’m not making sense.”

“I haven’t really felt like I’ve been making much sense either,” he admitted quietly.

“Like dangling off the edge of a two-hundred foot drop for no reason?”

“I told you the reason,” he said lightly, “that it’s fun.”

“You probably find explosions fun too,” she said sourly.

“It depends on how close I am to the explosion.”

“What frightens me is I don’t think you’re joking.”

“As I said,” he sat up, leaning ever so slightly to peek over the edge, pretending to teeter a little just because he was kind of an ass, “a little danger never hurt anyone.”

“And a little caution doesn’t hurt anything either.” Her hand immediately grabbed onto his arm, pulling him back. A thrill shot through him both at the renewed contact and the protective gesture.

“I suppose we could meet somewhere in the middle.” He inched back from the edge a few inches and some of the tension relaxed out of her frame. “If you’d like.”

“Perhaps.” She edged closer to him and the precipice, hand anchored around his arm as she pressed against him. “But I draw the line at explosions.”

“Oh, come on,” his breath puffed across her skin as he leaned in closer, “you love explosions, and you know it.”

He couldn’t see her roll her eyes, but he heard the exasperated breath she let out before her lips brushed chastely against his for the first time since Rishi. Her hand was still clamped down tight on his arm, as if holding on for dear life. He felt her tongue flick between his lips, a delicate tease that he obliged as he deepened the kiss. A wave of heat crashed over him, and if he wasn’t careful he could easily drown. 

It was just a small taste, but enough to light a deep, yearning hunger inside of Theron. Just like on Rishi, it reminded him of the exhilarating jolt coursing through his veins when space diving on Ruuria. Volcano boarding on Mima II. Base jumping off the Bubble Cliffs on Qiaxx. It was just as or even more intoxicating than every thrill he’d ever chased, and he wondered if every inch of her was just as much of a rush as this.

He eventually had to come up for air and broke away, her tiny moan of disappointment doing wonders for his ego. He leaned his forehead against hers, relishing in both the warmth of her skin and the soft tickle of her bangs. A soft tendril of breeze wrapped around them both, and he let his eyes drift shut as he tried to lean into this moment just as he had when they’d been watching the stars above. Wanting to make it last as long as humanly possible.

“I wanted to do that since you first stepped foot on Yavin,” he admitted quietly after several long moments.

“Why didn’t you?”

“Well, we were a little busy,” he said. “And we weren’t exactly alone.”

“This isn’t exactly a private space,” she pointed out.

“I know,” he breathed. “I just… wanted to do that one more time.”

“Only once?”

He opened his eyes to see hers meeting his. They sparkled with a mischievous glint that he was pretty sure would have earned her quite the lecture back in her Padawan days.

“More than once.” And more than just that, but the five million warnings from all of her nosy crewmates were echoing in his ears, and despite his better judgement, he heeded them. No one could ever accuse him of not listening after this, because damn if he didn’t want to pursue whatever this thing was to the very end. “Way more.”

“How many?” Her eyes crinkled as a bright smile lit up her face.

More than the number of stars in the sky, was the truth, but aloud he said, “I don’t know if you can count that high.”

“I’ll have you know, I’ve learned a lot of numbers.” She caught his laugh in another kiss, and when she broke away, her eyes were still glittering. “See, that’s two.”

“And here I just thought you were just a pretty face that knew a thing or two about swinging around a lightsaber.”

“Nope. I’m very talented.”

“At just about everything that I can see.” And because he could, Theron brushed his lips against hers once more.

“And that’s three,” she murmured, “although I’m tempted to not count it.”

“I have to switch things up every now and then, otherwise you’ll get bored.”

“If there’s one thing I haven’t been since I met you, it’s bored.”

“I must be doing something right then.”

“You are.”

She grabbed the collar of his jacket and yanked him to her, pulling him in for another kiss. She sucked in his bottom lip and ran her tongue over the indentation of his recently healed skin. It had been swollen, split, and sore their first kiss, and her enthusiasm then had been dampened by his injured state. Now she was like an explorer slowly mapping out a new star system, almost as if she was trying to commit everything to memory.

That prompted a too deep thought about the next day’s impending departure, so he surged forward and deepened the kiss—turning it into something so Theron surged forward, deepening the kiss into something so breathless and wild he didn’t have time to think about anything else.

“Has anyone ever told you,” her words were quiet as she broke away, hardly a whisper on the air, “that you can be very distracting?”

“A time or two,” he said quietly. “What am I distracting you from?”

“Everything.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

She shook her head ever so slightly, possibly without even realizing it. “I know what I’m supposed to say…”

“I’ve never been big on rules.” He brushed away the bangs that fell into her face, obscuring the stormy emotion beginning to brew in her eyes. “I find them too constricting.”

“I used to find the rules comforting. Everything in its place, and if you just followed them well enough, everything would turn out okay.”

“Used to?”

Her eyes dropped down to the ground then, expression falling as she shook her head. “I don’t believe that anymore.”

A hard lump settled in Theron’s throat as he looked at the dim expression, making it hard to swallow. All the sparkle and mischief had faded from her eyes, leaving a cold empty expanse as she stared unseeing down at the ground.  Something in his chest tightened and he found himself picking up her hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze, unsure of what else to do. She blinked, as if summoned back to the here and now from wherever she had gone.

“I’m sorry.” She shook her head lightly, as if trying to chase something away. “I think I broke the mood.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” he said gently, giving her hand another squeeze. “You don’t need to apologize.”

“We were having a good time, I… I let my mind wander.”

“No, I wasn’t thinking about what I was saying.”

“How are you supposed to know?” She laughed, but it was the choked desperate laughter of someone trying to hold on to their control.

“I feel like I should, or at least, not keep doing this to you.”

“It’s not just you. This just keeps happening. With everyone,” she whispered. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I should be better than this.”

“Do you want me to go?”

She shook her head quickly, giving the hand holding hers a tight, almost bone-breaking squeeze.

“I thought I was done with this. After Rishi… Master Orgus said he healed these scars left by… that should have fixed it. Shouldn’t it?” 

From the quiet desperation in Grey’s voice, he had a feeling the question was more rhetorical than something he could really answer. Not that the jumble of words made a lot of sense to him. Wasn’t… Orgus Din her final master before her knighting? Hadn’t he been killed near the beginning of her career as a Jedi? To Theron’s knowledge she had never even visited Rishi before being lured there by him and Lana. And he hadn’t a clue what scars her former Master was supposed to have healed.

“I thought,” he said carefully, “that he had passed away a long time ago.”

“He… visited me while we were on Rishi.”

 Theron almost asked about how exactly a dead man could just drop in for a chat and quick spiritual healing session, but if their encounters with Revan had taught him anything, it was that the Force was… weird. And complicated. And probably something he really didn’t want to think on too deeply because things like this just hurt his brain. Apparently even the boundaries of life and death were just mere technicalities to the Jedi like the one sitting next to him. Except Grey didn’t exactly look like the strong confident Jedi at the moment, more like a lost child looking for her parents. He could tolerate a few minutes of bizarre Force talk, if it helped ease that somehow.

“I’m sorry, I know this is strange.”

“No stranger than a half-zombie, half-ghost ancestor.”

The breath she exhaled was almost a wry laugh, but not quite. “That was a new one for me too.”

“At least we’re forging new territory together, eh?” He gave her hand a brief squeeze.

The corner of her mouth twitched up, nearly into a sad smile. “I suppose so.”

“So, was that the personal business you went to take care of before you headed to Torch’s Island?”

She nodded, giving him a sad smile. “He came to visit me one last time. I think he knew we weren’t going to succeed here on Yavin, and he wanted to try and help me one last time.”

“Masters are like that,” he agreed, his own thoughts briefly centering on Ngani Zho. “They just want what’s best for their Padawans.”

“He still called me that,” her eyes glittered with tears, “even as a ghost I was still his Padawan.”

“So is this whole Force ghost thing… common?” he asked uncertainly. 

She shook her head. “When a Jedi passes, they’re supposed to become one with the Force. Usually they don’t stick around for long conversations.”

“I guess Master Orgus felt the need to make an exception,” Theron said carefully.

“You could say that,” she smiled shakily. “He always did have to do things his own way. Even death.”

He nodded mutely, unsure of what he could say exactly. The only thing that came to mind were questions that he had promised not to ask, and even if it was a stupid promise, he still wanted to keep it. It was so easy to break things, but he wanted to try and keep his word to her intact. The reason why that was important was still vague and distant, but his gut said it was, and Theron always listened to his gut.

“You surprise me,” she said quietly, “you ask questions, but never the big one.”

“I promised you I wasn’t going to pry,” he reminded her. “I don’t want to be someone who breaks promises to you.”

“I don’t know what I’ve done to earn that.” He felt her other hand fold over his, enveloping it in a cocoon of gloved warmth. It was at that moment, he realized that he had never actually touched her with his bare fingers, that there had always been some sort of barrier between them. “It’s more than I deserve, but I’m grateful for it nonetheless.”

He didn’t have the proper elocution to properly unpack that statement and address it fully, but he felt the need to try, as inadequate as his own words were. “On Rishi. You came for me.”

Her lost expression softened as she met his eyes, but he was crap at decoding his own emotions, much less those of others. “Of course I did.”

“You didn’t have to.” His chest felt like someone was cleaving it in two, but he didn’t break his gaze, determined to try and at least attempt to finish his poor explanation. “I’m not used to that.”

“I will never leave you behind.”

The statement was uttered quietly, but so fiercely determined there was no doubt that she meant it. He swallowed, that lump still firmly lodged in his throat. The whole faith in others thing wasn’t usually in his repertoire, as it was a lot easier to glide on the default mode of skepticism. Everyone eventually moved on their own way, and logic said that nothing would be different this time. The determined look in her eye said exactly where logic could go, and Theron decided to side with the clear winner in this fight.

“I think I believe you,” he finally said, “which is kind of a first for me.”

“It won’t be the last,” she promised, wrapping her fingers around his tightly. “So get used to it.”

“Yes ma’am,” he said quietly, prompting a tiny sad smile.

“I wish I could be a brighter, stronger person for you. For everyone really, but you… make me want to be more.”

“I’m good with the person sitting with me right now,” he said. “You don’t need to be anything more than that.”

“You don’t need a fearless monster slayer? Someone who can look into the void and laugh?”

He shook his head. “That person doesn’t sound very fun.”

“She could be, if I tried.” Grey glanced down. “Maybe if I tried harder, I’d get there. And then hearing his voice again last night after all these years… it would have been fine.”

Theron pursed his lips together, feeling that hole in his chest starting to open up again. Here was the person in the rain last night, trying desperately to hide under armored plating and lightsabers. Not wanting to scare her off back under the thin Jedi veneer, he just ran his thumb along one of the elaborate pieces of metalwork on her glove, wishing that he could feel every groove in it directly instead of through the leather of his own gloves.

“You can ask,” she said brokenly, “if you want.”

Of course he wanted to — but this wasn’t about him. Not really. He just wanted to do the right thing here. Whatever that was. 

When he finally looked up, he saw the unshed tears in her eyes, and felt that small, infinitesimal hole in his chest begin to widen into a gaping wound. “Do you want me to ask?”

“I don’t know,” she said quietly. “I just don’t want to feel this way any more.”

“How do you feel?” he asked instead.

“Lost.” She bit her lip, looking away. “Like I’m back there again, even though I’m here. Like if I sleep too deeply, I won’t wake up as me.”

The nausea Theron had felt earlier after overhearing Scourge and Kira bubbled back up, filling the gaping hole with bile and a white, hot bubbling rage.

“I can’t wake up like that again,” she said so quietly he almost couldn’t hear. “Watching myself from afar, my body not my own. Screaming so loud but still unable to stop my hand. Have you ever been trapped in your own mind?”

“No,” he said hoarsely, trying to push the urge to vomit far back down. “I can’t even imagine… it sounds terrible.”

“I was so naive. I believed that anyone could be redeemed. Even him.”

There was such venom spat out in that single word, it only could have been reserved for something as unnatural as the ancient being that had been awakened the night before.

“I thought that there was always some small speck of light that could be brought out from even the darkest corner. I just had to trust in the Force, and it would guide me as it always does. It guided me… into darkness.” She swallowed, throat bobbing with the motion as she stared out at the shadowed landscape beyond. Almost as if she was expecting Vitiate to materialize from the darkness. “Just following the rules doesn’t work when someone ignores that they ever existed. It can’t protect anyone from that kind of evil.”

Theron thought of the fallen Jedi that she had chased after the six month gap in her file, and the dark ops leading up to that gap. Had they… stormed the Emperor’s Fortress, determined to capture him and bring him back to the light? How the hell did the Council think that would ever work? Capturing a supposedly immortal dark being and just force him to accept everything good and pure? That hot bubbling rage threatened to take him over.

“How old were you?”

“Twenty-two.”

He barely suppressed a curse. Sending a Knight, just barely two years into her career, to face down the almost literal embodiment of the Dark Side was just too much. Even with an entire team of dark ops Jedi. Even if they had sent her with the entire damn Republic army at her back it was too much. It would have been too much to ask even a wise and experienced Jedi Master like Ngani Zho and Orgus Din had been.

“They should never have asked you to do that.”

She blinked at him, surprised. “I volunteered.”

Of course she did. The moment he had brought his suspicions up with her regarding Darok, she had jumped on the chance to help him out. It was like she was incapable of just standing by if something bad was happening and had to try and fix it herself. That wasn’t the trait of a dedicated Jedi — it was the trait of someone with way too much to prove. He would know.

“I was never supposed to have innocent blood on my hands,” she whispered, “my lightsabers were never meant to be used for murder. No matter how much I wanted to stop, my hands wouldn’t listen to me. All I could hear was his laughter, his voice, telling me to give in. That he would make it all go away if I just gave over that last piece to him. Do you know what I did?”

Theron shook his head mutely.

“I hid. In the deepest corner of my mind, I hid. From him. From what he was making me do. I hid from everything. I was a coward.”

Theron wanted to pull her to him, tell her that she wasn’t, but he felt rooted to the spot. Somehow in defeating the demon from his past, they’d awakened hers. Pulling her back into what sounded like a living, waking nightmare. All he could do was squeeze his fingers around hers.

“In the end, I couldn’t even save myself.” Her voice was quiet, defeated. “Master Orgus’s spirit came from the Force and he found me, he was the one who broke the Emperor’s control over me. Everyone acts like I did something heroic and should be celebrated for breaking his control, when it was never even me to begin with.”

Here was the real truth, the real person he’d been seeking out that hid under that mask of the prefect Jedi. In her own way, the brave hero that everyone kept pinning their hopes on was just as broken as him. Struggling to live up to impossible standards and expectations. And just as lost and flawed and alone.

It took Theron a little while to find his voice, and when he spoke, it was rougher than he would have liked. “You still faced him down later, after all that?”

“Someone had to,” she said quietly, “and they all believed that I could. He was going to consume everything, all life. He was going to consume the Force. It was crying out. And even if it had abandoned me, I… couldn’t abandon it. Or everyone else. I couldn’t wait for the end to come without doing something. And no one else thought they could do it.”

“You didn’t either,” he pointed out softly.

She shook her head, like the fact that charging in to the demon’s lair was nothing noteworthy. Not too mention that she had done so after the kind of violation she’d been subjected to, and risked it happening again without any assurance. That would have been nearly impossible for anyone, and Theron had his doubts he would have been able to do it, even with literally the lives of every living thing in the galaxy on the line.

“When I was a child,” she said quietly, “I would pick up sticks in the forest and pretend they were my lightsabers. I only ever dreamed of being a Jedi, ever since my mother told me about her days as a Knight. I just wanted to be like her.”

That hadn’t been in her file. Actually, there hadn’t been much in it other than basic liner notes prior to her arrival on Tython. But she’d had a family once it seemed—and apparently a mother that she loved very much. There was a distant twang of jealousy, but it was swiftly carried away as he saw the wet tracks streaking down her face.

“I think she would be proud,” he said.

“She’s never visited me,” the confession came out broken, “not like Master Orgus. I wonder if… she wished I could have been stronger. More like her. She never had to throw away a bloodstained lightsaber. After Vitiate made me…” Her voice cracked and she had to swallow back the emotion that nearly dragged her under. “After I escaped, all I could see on mine was the blood, no matter how much I cleaned them.”

He knew absolutely nothing about Force ghosts or the woman in question, but from the reverent way Grey spoke of her, she had left quite an impression on her daughter. He wondered if that heavy, duty-filled legacy was one that had ever been truly intended to be passed on. He was far from an expert when it came to maternal figures and their intentions, but something in his gut told him that was probably not the case. 

“Master Satele, I think she knew,” Grey continued, filling in the silence, “when she gave me the new hilts. She told me that a Jedi needed to have faith in the weapons she wielded, faith in the Force. She helped me construct the new blades before I left Tython.”

Theron let his gaze drop, eyes tracing the path he was making as he marked each divot and design in the gauntlets on her gloves. For everything he still held against his mother, apparently he still had a few things to learn about her. Satele had reached out to a scared, vulnerable Knight, and helped her find confidence again instead of delivering any sort of platitude or lecture. He thought back to their argument earlier that day, trying to fit this new piece of the puzzle into his previous assumptions. It didn’t quite match up, like the sharp edges of his preconceptions needed to be shaved down.

“I made a vow that I would never let these be turned to serve darkness. I couldn’t let something of Master Satele’s become tainted like I had let mine.” Grey’s free hand traced some of the patterns in the hilts clipped to her belt. “I let her keep my old ones. She promised she’d make sure they were never used like that again.”

“I didn’t know about that, earlier,” he said, struggling to swallow past that ever present lump. “I would never have even mentioned it…”

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” She finally looked up from her lightsabers, pulling his gaze up from the patterns he was tracing as well. “You’ve done me no harm.”

Seeing her trying to console him, with the wet tracks still glistening on her cheeks was too much for him to take. Heedless of whoever might be able to see, he reached out and grabbed her, crushing her against his chest as if that could somehow fix anything. Her arms stilled for a moment as if this was something that hadn’t ever occurred before and she had no idea what to do, before suddenly curling around him, fingers digging deep trenches into the leather of his jacket like drowning victim clutching to a lifeline.

“Master Orgus said he couldn’t come back anymore.” Her face was buried in his jacket, voice muffled by the leather. “He was the only thing that brought me back last time. I… I can’t be trapped like that again. I can’t.”

“It’s okay,” Theron murmured, tightening his arms around her small shivering frame. “He’s left. He’s not here.”

“No one’s saying anything, but they’re all terrified. Even Scourge. I didn’t finish the job last time, and now he’s back.” The shivering intensified to an actual tremble, and it felt like someone was shoving a vibroblade right through Theron’s chest. “I have to kill him, but he’s already dead. But he’s not alive either.”

 The enormity of the task that had been assigned to her, by fate, or the Force, or whatever seemed to loom just off into the shadows of the night. The blame for Vitiate’s return at this moment in time, if not the assault and chaos on the Republic all the way three hundred years ago, lay squarely at Revan’s feet. It was the baggage of Theron’s own family, not hers. In a way, the responsibility for all of this should have laid at his feet. Perhaps if fate had twisted differently—if their places had been switched and he’d been born with all the powers of the Force that she wielded—it would have. Would he have been able to break away like her, or would he have wound up as twisted and broken as the rest of the members of her strike team?

Because Revan, for all his power and gifts in the Force, had cracked under the constant torture he’d been subjected to over the course of three hundred years. His psyche torn in two; one half twisted into something dark, monstrous, and almost unrecognizable from the Jedi he’d once been. Someone willing to commit mass genocide. Willing to upend everything if it meant he could get revenge against the one who had taken everything from him. Even Revan’s attempts to connect with what remained of his family had been tainted into something sick and twisted.

Theron couldn’t help but wonder if those same weaknesses ran through his blood in the way that the Force never had. It probably would never not sting, not grate on him a little when the Force peeked its head around to meddle in his life after the way it had abandoned him when he was young — but as he looked at the connections he shared with Grey, it was hard to completely deny that maybe it had somehow set something in motion.

Maybe they were both just meant to finish what Revan had started nearly three hundred years ago. Or maybe it was even more than that.

He had no idea how he was supposed to deal with any of this, Force-blind Jedi washout that he was. The task that lay before her was beyond his capabilities, but if they failed at stopping Vitiate, nothing would ultimately matter anyway. Even if Theron hadn’t been assigned as the task force’s liaison for the SIS, he would have busted down Marcus Trant’s door and camped out in his office until he’d gotten it. Whatever had happened prior to now was out of his hands, he couldn’t change any of their yesterdays, no matter how much he wanted to at the moment. But tomorrow wasn’t set yet, and he could still do something about that.

She had answered every one of his calls, even when he made her go through ridiculous lengths to find out it was him. The woman had stormed an entire fortress just for him. She was more than just his partner on this one job, she was his friend. Possibly the best one he had ever had. Maybe if he was really careful, did enough research, and did his job well enough, she’d never have to hear the voice of her tormentor ever again.

“What if I fall?” she asked brokenly, clinging to him tightly as they teetered on the edge of the platform with nothing but the inky night below.

“You won’t.” He tightened his grip around her quaking shoulders, as if he could shield her from the night. “You’re not going to fall.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because I’m going to catch you.” He pressed a kiss onto the top of her head, before glaring off into the night as if in challenge to the darkness just beyond them.

[not-close-to-straight]

Post surgery update? How are you? Still in pain?

(Warning, this will get the tiniest bit graphic- mind the cut))

Alright, surgery update---

I will be three weeks post op this coming monday and it has been the worst three weeks ever. 

I still cant stand up straight, really I cant even get CLOSE to standing up straight yet unless I am laced into a corset/compression garment that forces me almost upright, and then it fucking HURTS. 

I am still sleeping on a recliner because not only can i not stand up straight, i also cant lie flat! very fun! My neck and back hurt CONSTANTLY from sleeping in the recliner, and I can only make it to and from the bathroom and maybe to the kitchen to make some tea before it starts hurting too badly and i have to sit down. 

All of my steri strips have come off, which means i can finally see my incisions. I am cut from hipbone to hipbone, but for the most part the incision is below my bikini line so once I am healed, I will be able to wear bathing suits/undies still without anyone seeing the scar as long as they arent like ultra low rise panties or anything. Ive already developed hard scar tissue where my drains were inserted on both sides of my hip, so thats fun. Nice and bruised and hard right there. 

I ended up twisting wrong and my incision opened up about an inch which isnt as bad as it sounds, it didnt spit any stitches or anything, but it hurts like a really deep scratch and other than putting a band aid on it, there isnt much I can do about it until it heals. 

My boobs were cut under the crease and then straight up the middle and around my nipple to give me my reduction/ lift. It sucks. My left boob looks freaking BEAUTIFUL the incision is all the way inside the crease so you literally cant see it at all, and even the cuts up and around my nipple are healing wonderfully. My right side is worse, incision extends out past my crease a little which makes it very uncomfortable and the incisions up and around my nipple are still raised and sore. 

EVERYTHING ITCHES and i ended up scratching myself so badly one night as I slept that i ended up drawing blood which has been just... awful to deal with. Everything is super sensitive, and because i am still  wearing post surgery compression garments to keep any swelling down, i am basically strapped into the most uncomfortable things ever. 

I had an issue with the blood thinner shot they gave me, ended up with SIRVA in my left arm which rendered it basically paralyzed for the first two weeks, its only  been the last few days that i can even move it without it hurting and freezing up. Fun times. 

My gag reflex is very sensitive right now, so almost any time i try to swallow a tylenol or muscle relaxer or stool softener (try pooping after stomach surgery. literally will put you in tears), my gag reflex kicks in and more often than not i end up throwing up. which of course makes me cry. 

Overall, its been a really rough recovery and im only on week three. It will be at least three more weeks before i am able to stand straight and walk comfortably for more than a minute or so at a time, and another four to six weeks after that before I can do anything more than walk for exercise. I cant even pick up #Misha the Cat right now because her fat ass weighs too much and my stomach cant handle the strain. 

The PLUS SIDE is that my boobs which used to be huge and saggy are like, perky and gorgeous. I am still bigger than I thought I would be-- I was honestly hoping to be like a c cup, and Im still at least a d if not bigger (my post surgery sports bras are for dds and i am filling them out) but its a very perky d or dd so right now I sort of look like I have implants which ill admit is a little fun. They will settle more and look more natural over the next few weeks which is good. 

Since the pain pills never really worked, all they do is take the edge off, so I still hurt every day but its bearable. Honestly after those first few days before they got me a stronger pain prescription and i was feeling EVERYTHING---- what i feel now is barely anything. The worst pain is when i have to throw up or god forbid i fucking sneeze because that literally makes me scream. 

im exhausted all the time now-- the first two weeks i hardly ate anything because i was either crying from the pain or trying to sleep it off, and the post surgery compression garments are so tight even too much water at once made my stomach hurt. My appetite has just barely come back this week, and im still barely managing a full meal a day. 

Also, Im allowed to shower, but the water makes me itch (of fucking course) and after the shower i have to apply layers of scar cream and cocoa butter because the drier my skin is the worse the healing it and the worse the scar will be. I basically just sponge bath with wet wipes or a damp rag because getting in and out of all of my compression garments and in and out of the shower requires so much energy it honestly doesnt seem worth it. Like little things like brushing my teeth seem difficult because i cant stand up to do it-- have to be sitting on the toilet lol. And brushing my hair? Yeah right. I have super thick, fairly long curly hair that is a pain in the ass to handle anyway, and now that i cant really lift my arms above my head, just combing my hair is crazy difficult. 

Its been super rough on me, harder than I thought it would be, but my plastic surgeon is very pleased with the results so far. 

A big piece of me wishes I wasnt so vain to want the stomach surgery. the boob surgery was sort of necessary, i was way too big for being a size 4/6, but I got my stomach done because I worked so hard to lose all that weight and wanted all the loose skin gone, but DAMN this recovery has been such a bitch i think if i could go back, i wouldnt do it again. Not only did it cost me more than 10k, but im three weeks out and still cant even stand up straight which is more demoralizing than you would ever think it would be.  

Mentally its been very difficult on me, emotionally its been worse, and even though I know it will be worth it here in a few months when I pull out that leopard print bikini i worked so hard to fit into and look FUCKINGFABULOUS---

Right now, I just want to cry all the time. 

(also, its been more than a month since ive had anything that came close to sex, which is probably majorly contributing to how badly i want to write smut and also why i want to cry all the time lol)

All this to say--- recovery is rough. All the good vibes are appreciated. 

[transhumanitynet]

The Future You That You Least Suspect

The other night my teenage boys asked me what was on my mind (likely looking for material to make fun of me. Just kidding, they’re thoughtful kids).

Instead of trying to “kid proof” my thoughts or rush the conversation, I wrote them this letter. First, to explain that I’m consumed by how we think about and where we look for answers to the biggest questions of our time (listed below), and second, to propose an alternative way of finding answers (hint: I found inspiration in an amoeba).

How are we going to address climate change before it creates global chaos?

What jobs will be available for my kids when they finish school? What should they study?

Over the next few decades, how will we re-train ourselves fast enough — again and again — to remain employed and useful as technology becomes more capable?

Can the human race cooperate well enough to solve our biggest problems or will the future simply overwhelm us?

Most importantly, where do we look to find answers to these questions?

Hopefully I didn’t ruin the possibility that my kids will ever again ask me what’s on my mind 🙂

##

Boys,

There is an old joke where a man is looking for his keys under a street light. Another person walks by and inquires, “Sir, are you certain you lost your keys here?”

“No” the man replies, “I lost them across the street.”

Confused, the stranger says, “Then why are you looking here?”

The man responded, “The light is much brighter here!”

Credit

This comic is as humorous as it is true. All too often, we each do this when we’re trying to solve something. It’s where our brains naturally take us first.

Our imaginations are constrained to the familiar (under the light), so we have a hard time finding answers to difficult questions and problems because the answers often lie in the unknown (or in the comic above, the darkness). Staying in the light is natural, easy, and intuitive, but this limits our discovery potential.

I. How to look in the dark?

History can give us some hints about how others found interesting things in the dark. For example, we discovered that:

the sun is the center of our planetary swarm

the earth is round

the physical world is a bunch of tiny, uncertain pieces governed by quantum physics

Before these became accepted truths, they were very difficult to imagine. This is part because they are non-obvious and also counter-intuitive to our everyday experience.

It’s also because we can’t know what is not known, which means we’re blind to what is yet to be discovered. Don’t believe me? Try to think of something you don’t already know. It’s impossible! That is, until you know it, and then it’s obvious.

Going back to the 5th question, how and where can we look today to find new unknowns (the dark) that help us solve our biggest problems? Where are today’s insights that are equivalent to the sun is the center of our planetary swarm?

I think the most exciting and consequential place to explore is not looking outside ourselves, but looking inside; in our own minds. This is where I see the most fruitful answers to the questions about your future and mine.

What if the next reality busting revolution happened to our very reality and consciousness? And if that happened, could the future of being human be entirely unrecognizable from our vantage point today? I hope so, because the answers to our challenges don’t appear under the lights we have turned on so far.

You’re probably thinking, c’mon Dad, this is crazy talk.

Well, it’s happened before.

II. Thanks Homo Erectus, We’ll Take it From Here

Our ancestor Homo erectus lived two million years ago and wasn’t equipped with our kinds of languages, abstractions, or technology. Homo erectus was possibly an inflexible learner as evidenced by the fact that they made the same axe for over 1 million years.

Imagine trying to explain to Homo erectus a complex phenomena of our modern day society, such as the stock market. You’d have to explain capitalism, economics, math, money, computers, and corporations — after extensive language training and the inevitable discussion of new axe design possibilities (of course, trying not to offend).

The supporting technological, cultural, and legal layers that enable the stock market to exist are the engines and evidence of our prosperity. It’s taken us thousands of years to develop this collective intellectual complexity. The point is, our brains are incredibly capable of evolving and adapting to new and more complicated things.

That our cognition evolved from Homo erectus demonstrates that we have radically evolved before.

III. Amoeba, You’re So Smart!

A few months ago, Japanese researchers demonstrated that an amoeba, a single-celled organism, was able to find near optimal solutions to the following question:

Given a list of cities and the distances between each pair of cities, what is the shortest possible route a salesperson could take that visits each city only once and returns to the origin city? (image credit)

This is known as the Traveling Salesman Problem (TSP), and classified as an NP-hard problem because the time needed to solve it grows exponentially as the number of cities increases.

Humans can come up with near optimal solutions using various heuristics and computers can execute algorithms to solve the problem using their processing power.

However, what’s unique is that Masashi Aono and his team demonstrated that the amoeba’s solution to the TSP is completely different than the way humans or computers have traditionally solved it.

That’s right, this amoeba is flexing on us.

(Note: it’s worth reading about the clever way they set up the experiment to allow the amoeba to solve the problem.)

This got me thinking: when we’re confronted with a problem, we use the tools at our disposal. For example, we can think, do math, or program a computer to solve it.

Professor Aono found a different tool for problem solving: a single-celled organism.

I know what you’re thinking, can the amoeba do my homework or take tests for me? It’s a good question!

Also, kudos to Aono and his team for searching in the dark — this experiment is non-obvious.

IV. Why Am I Telling You About Amoebas?

I strongly believe that we need a major cognitive revolution if we are to solve the global challenges we face. Our species evolved before and we can do it again, but we can’t wait a million years; we must accelerate this evolution.

What I’m saying is very hard to understand and imagine, because it’s in the dark. But bare with me.

The amoeba gives me hope because it didn’t evolve to solve the TSP. We augmented it with technology to accomplish something pretty amazing. Similarly, we haven’t evolved to deal with cooperating on a global scale, battle an invisible gas that warms our planet or retraining our brains every few years as AI takes over more of our work. How can we augment our own minds to allow us to take on these challenges?

Imagine a scenario where you are dressed head-to-toe in haptics (think Ready Player One) that allow you to experience and understand things by feeling changes in vibrations, temperature, and pressure.

Also imagine that you have a brain interface capable of both reading out neural activity and “writing” to your brain — meaning that certain communications can be sent directly into to your brain — the kind of stuff I’m building at Kernel.

Let’s call this a mind/body/machine interface (MBMI). It would basically wire you up to be like the amoeba in the experiment.

Now, what if you were given certain problems, such as the TSP, that your conscious and subconscious mind started working to solve? Imagine that instead of “thinking” about the problem, you just let your brain figure things out on it’s own — like riding a bike.

Would you come up with novel solutions not previously identified by any other person, computer or amoeba?

If we actually had the technology to reimagine how our brains work, over time, I bet that we’d get really good at it and be surprised with all the new things we can do and come up with. To be clear, this is not just “getting smarter” by today’s standards, this is about using our brains in entirely new ways.

Maybe that means that your school today would be in the museum of the future.

People would likely use these MBMIs to invent and discover, solve disagreements, create new art and music, learn new skills, improve themselves in surprising ways and dozens of other things we can’t imagine now.

When thinking about the possibilities, hundreds of questions come to my mind. For example, could we:

minimize many of our less desirable proclivities, individually and collectively?

become more wise as a species?

come up with original solutions to climate change and other pressing problems?

accelerate the speed someone learns (i.e. you get a new kind of PhD at age 12 versus the average of 31 today)

I wonder, is this what you will do at your job in 20 years? Would your mind change so much that it would be hard to recognize your 15 year old self?

Ultimately, for our own survival, we are in a race against time. We need to identify the problems that pose the greatest risks and respond fast enough so that we avoid a zombie apocalypse situation. The most important variable to avoid that: we need to be able to adapt fast enough.

I’m sure at this moment you’re thinking, woah, Dad, calm down!!

V. Your New Job — Being Really Weird (in a good way)

You’re right in wondering what jobs computers will take — if not all of them. They’ll do the boring things that adults do to make money, except far better and for far less money. But imagine a scenario where AI relieves you of 75% of your current day-to-day responsibilities, and is much better at doing those things than you. (I imagined what this world could look like)

A lot has been written, even movies made, about this scenario (e.g.Wall-E). If this happened, would you play fully immersive video games all day? Or live a life of pleasure and be work-free? Certainly possible, although those are linear extrapolations of what we are familiar with today — meaning that’s simply taking what we know today and mapping it into the future. The same thing as looking in the light.

What if millions or even billions of people could build careers by exploring new frontiers of reality and consciousness powered by MBMIs? These types of “weird” thought exercises may be breadcrumbs that extend the considerations we’re willing to make when thinking about our collective cognitive future.

These may be the starter tools that empower us to become Old Worldexplorers setting out for the New World, and journeying on the most exciting and consequential endeavor in human history — an expedition, inward, to discover ourselves.

Dad

  orginally posted here:

https://medium.com/future-literacy/the-future-you-that-you-least-suspect-18cf63bd0061 

The Future You That You Least Suspect was originally published on transhumanity.net

[nobuckingway]

Winter is definitely NOT my favorite time of the year when it comes to horse riding. You are constantly disrupted with bad weather which in turn messes up your routines. Below I have outlined a few tips, and advice on how I cope, from keeping motivated while riding, to dealing with the likes of Mud Rash. 

Have a read below & be sure to comment on any tips you have of your own, be warned I have added in a few quirky tips of my own that may possibly only relate to me!! 

Rugging

If your horse is clipped, then I highly recommend they be rugged! Do be aware that over rugging can also be a problem. Be sure to keep an eye on the weight of your rug. Rugs can vary from light-weight, medium-weight to heavy-weight! If you turn your horse out in the winter rugged up be sure to keep an eye on their condition, take their rug of for an hour once a week to give them a breather, it also gives you time to have a good look at their weight etc. 

Try not to over rug your horse, just because you are feeling the cold doesn’t mean they are, that is not how it works! Older horses, and clipped horses may feel the cold that bit more. Start off with a light weight rug, and as you move into the depths of the winter increase the weight. Another valid point to consider, your horse may loose weight during the winter, if your horse is prone to this make sure to keep them well rugged.

You can check how warm they are & determine if they need an extra layer by simply putting your hand in under there rug, feel up around the withers, if its cold add an extra layer, if it is wet or they feel as if they are sweating they most definately need a lighter rug. Check out the 4 links below, for a selection of different rugs on offer at the moment! 

Holmestead Saddlery Winter Rug Collection

TRI Equestrian Winter Rug Collection

The Equine Warehouse – Currently have an Autumn Rug Sale!

Sports Direct Horse Rugs

Darielle’s Random Tip: A great way to find out your horses temperature, cuff your hand around the base of his ear, this is generally a great indication of their body temperature, a great way of telling if they are warm or cold! Well it works for Dante anyways!

Rugging Tips:

Keep a bail of twine handy around the yard incase of emergencies! You never know when you may need to repair a fillet string!

Label your rugs (If you can) It is quite handy to put a small tag on the front fasteners of your rug, its is barely noticable and relitavely stays out of the way! In the long run it will save you getting your rug mixed up with someone else, lets face it all rugs start looking the same once the muck starts sticking to them! 

Darielle’s Random Tip: This is a very interesting tip I read online a while ago, and I am hoping maybe one of our readers will test it out!! Here it goes, using dental floss to sew up tears/patches in your rugs! Apparently dental floss is waterproof and very strong, so feel free to give it a go and let me know how you get on!

Having a cooler on hand during the winter is vital. It is great to have them handy for those cold evenings, to throw on them to cool them down that bit quicker, also handy for putting on them while in the horse box for travelling!

Horse Care

Feeding: Some horses don’t get fed during the summer months, as they are turned out in luscious paddocks with rich grass! For me Dante, had the best of both worlds, he was fed twice a day during the summer. Not much will change for him during the winter months, with only a slight increase in his food intake. I will also be incorporating more oils into his feed, this will help his joints over the colder months. 

Sunflower Oil

Karron Oil

Linseed Oil

Karron Oil is my go to supplements for him, I find it great, that or linseed oil. When my bank balance doesn’t allow me to buy the more expensive oils, I settle with sunflower oil, (69c a bottle in Lidl, I really cant go wrong) 

Mud Rash: One of the most common winter infections for your horse to pick up. It affects the horses legs, and is associated with the skin being exposed to the bacteria that is in the soil. Not all mucky legged horses will get mud rash. Some horses simply have sensitive skin, so they are more prone. 

  Available to buy from Holmestead Saddlery

  Not to worry though, as there is a solution. When bringing in your horse from the field make it a habit to hose down their legs, and towel drying them afterwards. There are also a lot of creams on the market for this condition if it gets bad. I have linked above the Pink Hoof Clay, that I highly recommend!

Foot Care: Winter is not the most ideal time for your horses feet, especially if they are standing out in overly mucky wet soggy fields. This in turn makes your horses feet quite soft. Loosing shoes is a huge liability during the winter months, the muck has weird ways of sucking them off that I simply cannot explain, so keep an eye on those hooves when you bring them in from the field, and again hose off that muck! 

Cornucrescine, one of my favourites! Buy now from TRI Equestrian

Plus Vital, Holmestead are currently running a Plusvital Hoofcare package, click to view!

Keeping their hooves conditioned is another major plus to keeping good hoof care, you really cannot disagree that cornucrescine is on of the best, but Plus Vital is also another one on the top of my list, see a few of my suggestions below!

Darielle’s Random Tip: I am not sure if anyone else does this or if I am just a weirdo! But I always cut my horses tails a little bit shorter during the winter months, it keeps the muck from gathering on it! This may just be me being a complete freak though!! 

  Riding & Keeping Motivated

Winter is most definitely not ideal weather to be riding in, its cold, wet & miserable. I have listed a few tips below to keep you motivated. Myself & Orla will be running a winter exercise blog also, hopefully it will be up & running in the next two weeks! We will be going through different exercises to keep you & your horse motivated and fit over those dreaded winter months! So keep your eye on the blog in the future weeks!

Winter Riding Tips:

Dont put that half arsed effort in, give it 100% or dont do anything at all. If your miserable riding, more than likely your horse will start to be too. You want positive vibes & energy when your riding.

If your having an off day, or you simply cant get the heat into your body, lunge your horse. It will give them a chance to stretch out. More than likely your horse will be in the stable more during the winter, so getting them out to move their legs will keep them in good spirits. A 20 minute session is plenty, no need to go into long hourly sessions!

If you have a walker, USE IT!!! It is not only a magnificent addition to cooling down your horse quicker, but you can also use it for warming up your horse! Make the most of your amenities!

Keep things interesting. If you only have access to riding in an arena during the winter make sure to plan out exercises in advance to keep you & your horse on your toes, better yet set out a winter goal for you and your horse. Learn new things, or start doing more no stirrup work! Its all beneficial to your training!

Get up early and go for hacks! Hacking in the winter is one of my favorite things to do, those crisp winter mornings are my favorite. 

Have you got an Exercise sheet? If you do use it, a clipped horse will appreciate it hugely on those bitter cold days!! Worse case scenario, you can take if off mid session if you feel your horses is working up a sweat. 

Look After Yourself

As much as we all hate to admit it, we are all only human, not superhuman! Winter takes its toll on some of us, from catching colds to old injuries creeping back in due to the coldness in the air! If you plan on surviving the winter make sure you look after yourself as much as you look after your horse. The weather isn’t always fantastic, so don’t try to over do it with the riding if the weather conditions are not on your side. A few extra days off for your horse in the winter will definitely not hurt, and who can complain about those extra hours sitting in front of the fire!

Winter Tips:

Dress appropriately, Wear the Dam coat!!! 

During the winter months, I always bring a spare pair of clothes with me to the yard, or I leave them sitting in my car! It is not ideal walking around the place is soaking wet clothes, or with wet soggy feet, so make sure to pack some spares.

Wear a hat, keep that head warm! It keeps the heat in. 

Invest in a good pair of gloves, for riding and for doing the yard work! See below some I highly recommend with Roekl being my favs, I cannot fault them! 

I recommend everyone buying at least one pair of these gloves! I have 3 pairs, and have my eye on another for Winter! Click To Buy – Stockist TRI Equestrian

One last tip I would highly recommend to everyone during the winter months, look after your tack! It can take a bit of a bashing during the Winter, from not being used as regularly to sitting in cold tack rooms! That along with your boots, (tendon, fetlock boots)they will all need a lot of attention if you want them to stay in good condition over the winter months!

If you follow our Instagram #NoBuckingWayBlog you will know that I often waffle on about a certain leather cleaner that works absolute wonders!! I will link it below.

Absorbine Horseman’s Leather Cleaner, in my opinion, simply the best! Click To Buy – Stockist Holmestead Saddlery

  Hopefully someone finds the above helpful, if you have any tips of your own to get you throught he winter, make sure to leave your comments below!

Darielle

#NeighNSlay 

Tips & Tricks for Winter Riding Winter is definitely NOT my favorite time of the year when it comes to horse riding. You are constantly disrupted with bad weather which in turn messes up your routines.

[travelinghermit]

May 15: The Apocalypse

Another day another story. I am laying on one of the four beds in my 20 Sole hotel room. Its cold, I have all my daily layers on and no wifi. I had not not intended to be staying here in the small village of Contumaza tonight in fact I had passed here earlier today on my way to the coast but very unforseen circumstances forced my hand back. I am not bothered by these events though, tonight I had a huge dinner of rice, chicken, vegetables, and lentils, with surprisingly delicious chocolate cake all for 6.50 Soles or $2.70. I may have indulged in two slices.

I rode out of Cajamarca around 9am but not without stopping first at the market grabbing two top quality yogurt drinks special of Cajamarca, one Coconut and another Golden berry. Cajamarca to my understanding is famous for its dairy products cheeses and yogurts are the stand out. You cant walk down a street without passing one of dozen dairy markets. Once I devoured my tasty chicken sandwich, coffee, and one yogurt. I was off to my destination Trujillo.

Only 270k it looked deffinitley do-able as I prechecked my map this morning. Even then I was a little weary knowing exactly the type of landscape I have been riding on over the past week. Mountains. A lot of them and they are slow, torturous, and Ill admit a bit fear provoking to tread. I paid $12.00 for gas - still cant get over that and even filled up an empty 2.5 liter water bottle for added comfort - thanks for the tip Mom. The sun was bright, it seemed like it was going to be a good day.

From morning to mid afternoon the riding was great. Driving as always through gorgeous scenery it truelly never gets old. Im sure ill write something about the scenery every single day because the mountains are something else I tell ya. Something very Himalayan in the Peruvian-Andean mountains yet at the same time very much their own brand. The day took a twist when the fog suddenly came lurking in embedding everything around me as I ascended higher up one of the many mountains. There is deffinitley something paranormal about fog that just stirs your soul the wrong way and can easily make anyone delirious, lost, and above all else broken.

From then on things only got more fun. I would be entrenched deep inside the fog and then turn a corner and feel the warm freedom of the sun shining on me once again. The welcome sight of the green mountain tops around me ushered in a much needed feeling of relief. Being swallowed by the fog almost makes you feel like your slightly suffocating. Yet the fog had other plans it wasnt done yet. It was slowly chasing me down.

As I passed Contumaza the first time the smooth pavement ended and now I was riding on scattered gravel, mud, and trying to avoid the countless pot holes as I was back ascending another mountain. I quickly passed one mororists and then suddenly I was completely alone on the gravel road. I never noticed I usually go through stints rarely seeing others especially if its not a main road but this time their was a good reason. Now I was nearing the top and the road was getting really interesting. Tall rock formations like waves overhead of me, I passed a tunnell - literally a narrow path through a hole in the middle of a mountain, and then I saw some kind of road block a ways infront of me. It was obvious from the sight a massive and I mean it looked apocalyptic, landslide ravaged this side of the mountain. Yet a very narrow path perhaps the width of the night table beside me now was inscribed among the scattered rock to the other side. “Are you f-ing kidding me?” I get off my bike in disbelief. The path looked do able so I lingered long enough to get some photos of the path saving little thoughts to sprout in my brain all the reasons not to do it. I took it slow, and it was very do-able indeed. I was victorious beating the landslide this time completely unaware what awaited me further below.

From this point onward I really do believe I entered some Twilight Zone parallell universe. Where a natural disaster completely wiped out a small community below this mountain the day prior and only I have seen the wreckage today. Obviously this is not true but now the fog was starting to catch up to me so with that and seeing this insane landslide it was painting quite the very vivid picture in my mind. That wasnt all though as I descended further down the wreckage only increased. More landslides to maneuver around, then I was riding right next to deep holes in the ground which seemed like the land was torn apart and now streams were starting to form inside them. Something happened here, I have no idea what. The road became more treacherous as I droven down the parallel universe mountain. Just when I thought it was all over I would find another tearing of the earth over atleast 5 meters across with a tiny motobike path on the side. I figured there must of been a gnarly earthquake because none of this was natural, infact far from it and nobody was around. I saw houses but they only looked abandoned. Yet with each barrier, I would get around it then I glanced at three small stones forming a line straight in my gravel path. I drove by them pondering their meaning and then I was stopped dead in my tracks. A hole straight in the middle of the road atleast 10 meters in length. There was no getting around this one. I looked down the mountain and it wasnt a hole, it was a massive crack in the earth that stretches farther down destroying even more roads. I got off my bike, I was angry as i threw one of my gloves on the ground. Worst of all I was so close off this treacherous mountain to the next town Cacas. I couldnt believe what I was seeing but what was I to do? Nature beats Man every time. There was no besting this one. I was more upset that I would have to go back and go over all those trials I completed. But thats exactly what I did. By now the fog slipped its way clouding my vision.

“This is no longer cute” I thought to myself thinking of all the times I wrote of the ‘challenges" which Peru has graciously offered on my plate. Its actively trying to break me I thought, theres no other way around it. First my bike fall, then the flood, then the treacherous mountain passes, then the hell driven busses, then the fog, then this apocalyptic wasteland. I kept my calm the entire way. Ive been through alot on my motorbike adventures and its going to take a hell of a lot more to break me. I finally got back to the initial landslide with the narrow pass an inch away from desolation. Now with the added fun fog. I hit it right away but again going slow and in no time I was back safely on the otherside, back in the real world, no longer the apocalypse. Right then and there I told myself I deffinitley am not getting to the coast today. It was 3pm I was done and the fog still hadnt let up. I slowly made my way back to Contumaza as I now write this.

Tomorrow im taking a different way.

But what was that? I ask myself hours later. What the hell really was all that?