#I can't get over this engine
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No idea when the last time I posted here was, but gosh it's been awhile
Half-Life and Source 2 isn't my main focus these days, I've mostly been working on my Team Fortress 2 characters over on DeviantArt So you might not see much from me anymore, sorry :")
My spark for Half-Life has come back recently, so I took some ideas I've had for awhile and decided to make my first Half-Life character
Yes, a Gman A variant with different personality and powers This is an early design, so it might change later, or maybe not Either way, I literally just created him and is a huge WIP
I'm not sure how much time I'll take to work on him, but he's mostly going to be a part of another story I'm working on. Plus gold textures are literally the greatest thing in Source 2?? This engine still has me awestruck WAAAAA
Anyway yeaa, back from the dead?? (We'll see for how long lmao)
#half life#gman#half life 2#g-man#s2fm#source 2 filmmaker#source filmmaker#myart#YOUSEEINGTHISSHITGORDON#I'MBACK(MAYBE)#I can't get over this engine#GOLD#I've joined the Gman band wagon
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what is it about my dads house that makes me want to end it all
#answer is so many things#the main thing thats pissing me off at the moment is that#over christmas he was on a rant about financial issues#he's always been stingy and weird about money but he was fully crying and telling me about debt and overdrafts etc#i dont want to remember the details#but obviously i believed him#it lined up with me suddenly getting given the max student loan after preciously getting the minimum#plus a bursary that you only get if your parents are under the low income bracket#so when he told me all that i sarted trying to figure out how much of my loan i could give to him whilst still managing at uni#and it confirmed my decision to drop out and only do the bachelors#because i thought he wouldn't be able to help me through another year of uni#and i'd have to work to stay with him (like i will with my mum)#anyway. i get back for easter holidays#everything is overshadowed by my cat dying ofc#but he has bought a motorbike JDBDJDJ#he's getting loads of work done on the house#he was fine to pay for the cat's cremation despite me offering a thousand times to cover it#he's still stingy but generally acting like he does have the money that his engineering job would provide#the motorbike was . a slap in the face#like Ok i dropped out of uni because i thought both my parents were financially incapable of supporting me if i didn't start working soon#my mum DEFINITELY is#when i tried to tell my dad that over christmas he shouted over me and tried to claim she's loaded#.... lmao. she is the one who's under the low income bracket#yet he just didn't believe me#:/#i shouldn't be ranting about this#publically hdndjdndj#haven't been venting in a while 😭😭😭😭#there are plenty of other things eating me up about him#but this is the one i can't stop thinking about at the moment
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Hey, Star Trek Writers... -taps the glass-
#star trek#the only people from Voyager's main cast I could see wanting to be a captain are Chakotay ??? maybe? and DEFINITELY Harry Kim#Harry Kim is the only guy on that ship who I'd actually cheer and scream and cry and click my heels if he became captain#bc it's actually something I think he'd be suited for AND it fits with his personality/goals...<3#like I saw a clip from Picard and like...Seven of NINE??? Why would she want to be a captain?? I think in that case 'making captain' is jus#shorthand for 'we finally accept you into structured society and you're no longer an outcast' which I do NOT like#also Tuvok's a captain???? Why???? Nothing about Tuvok screams captain material or that he'd even WANT to be a captain#I imagine him being chief of security or a professor (or both) until retiring - MAYBE a first officer#OH same with Janeway only she would HATE being an admiral and loves being captain#like next they're gonna tell me that B'Elanna Torres is a starfleet captain* - NO ! she is an ENGINEER!#Sorry I can't get over how bad Tuvok would be as a captain - he's not suited for it and does NOT seem interested#*so that we can all go 'oh yay I accept this as shorthand for the federation accepts her' - HEY#if the only thing you can think of to show that a character has achieved true happiness & respect & peace is becoming a 'respectable' rank#in the future pseudo not-military: maybe think about that more deeply
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hello all you hedgehog lovers. and hedgehog haters. and hedgehog lukewarmers.
#(OOC.) ''The kind of tired regular sleep can't fix.''#((i have not received my copy of sonic x shadow yet but the brain cell is warming its engines for sonic content))#((im currently over on rosalina's blog right now))#((but the sonic muses have a high likelihood of running rampant after i get some generations in my system))#((i hate how tails-coded i am. actually playing the game? yeah that'll be cool and i'll love it... but like.......))#((DAMNNNNNNNNN GIMME THAT GERALD ROBOTNIK LORE BOOK WHOOOOO BABY LET ME IN THERE))
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funni ragdol
#I CAN'T GET OVER THE ENGINEER ONE BAHAHA#tf2 scout#tf2#tf2 engineer#tf2 spy#tf2 sniper#team fortress two#team fortress 2#tf2 ragdoll
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me when i block someone who thinks they can talk to me like they know anything true about me
#when you think you can demand explanations from me this is who you're bad faith talking to#sleeping on them hoes#you. all of you are the hoes.#you don't know me like that#ESPECIALLY if it's about some shit ass marvel ip#I'll probably never get over being aggressively demanded to retract or otherwise engage in an argument#about some throwaway kinda bitchy comment i made. about a marvel tv show.#you know. the american military propaganda engine.#yep. and then blocked by said hoe. all within maybe an hour#aka before i could even respond if i wanted to (i did not).#like we talked 2 maybe 3 times TOTAL. extremely superficially.#who the fuck are you??? you're nobody. The Audacity. THE GALL.#i mean i do try to not be a bitch on here unprompted/unnecessarily. which this usually comes off as#but we are Not friends. i say that as a fact. its 80 degrees outside and we are not friends.#¯\_(ツ)_/¯#rant over#but not really lol nothings ever over if i have anything to say about it#I'll die on every hill bitch you can't unfollow me in a way that matters#tee hee
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the thing about the borgias is that it is a show in which the writers want the characters to be engaged in Schemes and Plots but their plans are often things like "poison a guy at a dinner party that YOU are hosting" or "frame a guy for a murder that occurred when he was publicly at a meeting elsewhere" or "try to assassinate a guy in a bathhouse full of other people" or "murder an illiterate guy and frame it as suicide by leaving a written note" so i am frequently forced to conclude that many of these people are in fact kind of stupid rather than the hardened schemers i am supposed to think they are.
#cesare has like maybe a 65% chance of success in his schemes so far#lucrezia is doing the best out of anyone i think she's getting good at having affairs and engineering accidents#i'm only at the start of season 2 so maybe things will get better but like. these are not great plans guys. they're bad.#i can't get over how micheletto's assassination plan was in a PUBLIC BATHHOUSE#pie says stuff#the borgias#pie watches the borgias
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what in the. see this is why it's a good thing that multiplayer videogames especially are about having fun & being yourself like what do you mean disguised spies automatically had the speed of the disguise's class & everyone's like yea if i wasn't always going for the scout disguise i'd kill myself right now. i'd be like haha can't catch Me out supposedly the extra slow or extra fast class >:) i am a harmless engineer
#something something like ah as scout you move fast & can be allll the way over there & your line of sight is above your Visible head#devastating. sure i Always could've looked these things up but i just like figured. don't disguise as heavy or scout; a plausible limitatio#i mean i guess i always did okay as spy b/c like in random lobbies there's just more chaos factor so like. no Your Je Ne Sais Quoi is off#even in terms of like ''why would xyz class being doing abc rn'' like who can say....i sure can't like#never knew the maps much less their Strategic Points for Whatevering. rarely tried being a Real Engineer like where do i put shit#or real demo like i don't want a team to think that role is covered. it is basically not. or a soldier even when i think that was like#recommended basic / beginner role. well i never figured out how to rocket jump reliably so jot that down#heavy pretty straightforward. medic i figured out soon enough you're Mostly supposed to support a heavy lol like okay if we need one#go figure i never seemed to do well as pyro; an alright scout probably like you really can have fun & be yourself zooming around like that;#sniper i was okayish too like yeah perhaps i can lurk & take out a heavy. or get into an intractible [the snipers are fightinnnng]#spy also okayish like again w/chaos on my side sure maybe i can sabotage turrets backstab a sniper heavy medic & cloak away....#but also all this like No special abilities or weapons. i don't even have the basics down lol. what is this link talking abt trickstabbing#are they not all trickstabs lol....apparently not exactly. i am discerning it is the art of [spy backstab] plus Juking#so i guess anything but the theoretical standard Surprise Approach. ''that know they are a spy'' ''in difficult situations''#ppl listing off a bunch of Named Trickstab Maneuvers lmfao talk about kill me. good thing videogames are about having fun & being yourself#also that i couldn't play tf2 now if i wanted to. which eh i kinda do b/c the whole time it Was like yeah this'll be a mess but haha whee#again good thing that ppl theoretically can now though? vs whatever peak ''so matches are overrun w/bot players'' times#why was that a thing at all. something something Items okay. alright back at things i Can do after another Looking Stuff Up tangent#prior geological eras into Big Events on that scale into Large Insects into lol giant water bug i.e. weird but in charge of the nighttime#i'm just still arm slung around tf2 like a smissmas miracle despite it all for sure#& it really even is that rare Games I've Actually Played Myself Ever....it really is....#hey what in the disguised enemy spies can be healed too? & like for real not just Appearing to be? what a menace lmao
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Musketeer Jamie is so gorgeous it's a crime 💖
A little something for @ferlost !
#wysty draws#thomas the tank engine#ttte humanized#ferlost#ttte james#musketeer jamie#hello miss you're looking so splendid today~#fer your designs are banger and I just can't get over your jumo EEEEEEEE
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u know what i've been thinking about. how the economy expects you to be, right now, at a job you've been at and consistently getting raises in for like, ten years. it's almost like the implication is "well yeah, you'll be able to live off this job in three, five, ten years if you stick with it and grow in the company" which is all fine and dandy, but i kind of need to live right now
#the queen of trash has spoken#rewrote this post six times and it turned into an essay both times and i don't really need it to lol#also thinking about the graphic i saw this morning that said the average spending power of $100 here is $41 compared to the national averag#which i guess? min wage is just over $16 here. but uhhhhhhhh i think my city is one of the most expensive in the state as far as cost of#living goes (not hard since we're the second largest city in a state of three decent sized cities and mostly large towns)#and its just crazy bc i look at my coworkers some of whom haven't been there much longer than me#who have kids and a house and stuff#and i realize oh. their husbands are engineers or lawyers. plus they're probably making more than me because they're team leads or managers#or have been there longer. meanwhile my 25 year old ass is making $20 an hour and my boyfriend is making $18 an hour#both doing highly-specialized work#and like. the idea that in ten years if i last that long both in the company and in this mortal coil#THEN i'll be making a living wage (in today's money)#is like. so wack! considering the fact that people really aren't staying in jobs for very long for various reasons#and for some positions the only way to get a raise is to move to a whole new company#it's just crazy! the fact that a 25 year old with a bachelor's degree can't even afford a fucking APARTMENT.#like everyone should be able to have housing obvs and the obvious solution to this is a universal basic income#but the fact that my experiencce in the economy is so different from my brothers (who is seven years older than me) and COMPLETELY#unrecognizable to that of my parents when they were my age. like i know billionaires are totally disconnected from reality#but in what universe is this a successful economy? /rq i know the answer i promise
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Blue Devil #10
Dan: I'm NOT a superhero!
Also Dan:
-keeps saving people-
-keeps getting caught up in situations with supervillains-
-keeps winding up in situations involving demons and magic-
-keeps bumping into superheroes and occasionally working with them-
-keeps saving people-
-keeps saving people-
-keeps saving people-
Dan: ...I. Am Not. A Superhero. I just have a really big protective streak! Okay?!
#fira reads Kid Devil#Dan Cassidy#Blue Devil#I honestly don't blame him for getting irritated though#the man clearly does not WANT to be a superhero#he'd probably be immensely happy if this nonsense would stop#and he could just go back to being an actor/stuntman/special effects engineer#but with his protective streak he clearly can't bring himself to stay out of things#Dan's just flat-out doomed by his over-responsibility and protective streak
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if you could change the outcome of any 3 motogp races (the outcome of the championship doesn’t change regardless tho) which ones would you chose?
one of those asks that immediately made me forget every single race I've watched in my life. it's a tough one, especially with the championship thing... I'm gonna add another criterion here and say nothing to do related to injury/death
so... I came up with one quite quickly, then got stuck, then came up with a second and got even more stuck. I'm quite reluctant to change any 'plot-relevant races' in the context of specific careers and rivalries, plus I'm ideologically opposed to stealing any win off a non-alien and giving it to an alien. which then kinda left me?? well. stuck. I don't like these picks but well maybe I'll come up with something better at some point
assen 2018: I simply could not come up with a third race so I'll just throw this one in. dovi + valentino really really should have gotten onto the podium in this race, those were extremely podium-worthy performances, it was such a deeply silly incident between the pair of them that took them out of podium contention. also it's still seen as a classic race and... I don't even begrudge the two beneficiaries for their podium, it's just one where the three best riders that day didn't end up on the podium and I would change that!! I don't even really care that much but also look I had a spot to fill. would've enjoyed the rancid podium vibes, it's what a race of that quality deserved
sepang 2018: just deeply annoying? like, I think it was a super impressive performance, the consistent lap times trick from a 78 year old was very neat, it was cute when jorge did unprompted valentino prop for metronome solidarity reasons, it's one of literally two premier class races where valentino crashed out of the lead so I don't even hold it against him. but... well, that one might have been building to a battle between marc and valentino, and it would've been fun to see that! not least because of location + relationship vibes in 2018. I'd change the result in preventing the crash, don't really care who wins after that point - hey, they can crash each other out if they want. I Just Wanted To See It
styria 2020: bit of a niche one but I remember being pissed off by this so I'm going with it - this should have been mir's win without the bloody red flag. now I'm very sorry that maverick was just having an abysmal time in austria, peace and love to him, I'd probably never step foot in the country again after the eight days he had in that country.... but still, his bike attempting to murder him did ruin what really should've been joan's first win. I'm very defensive of mir's win stats and I was supporting the title bid with zero wins agenda once that looked plausible, but now that he's just gotten stuck on one win for quite a few years... well, again, I do think it's kinda iconic but I'd also let him have two. and back then he wasn't even really looking like a title contender and was still going for his FIRST win.... I was feeling very sorry for him so. there
#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#the way I struggled with this you'd think I've never been upset by a race in my life#idk I do usually come around on most results for narrative purposes? like I can talk myself into vibing with most results#in THIS sport mind u in Certain Other Sports I've spent the last two and a half years screaming crying throwing up#anyway with the alien seasons I'd go with 'change all the technical regulations and start again' but that feels like a different question#I had a few where I was like 'well misano 2008 could've been more interesting if casey hadn't crashed'#or 'the 2009 title fight would've had a more exciting conclusion if jorge hadn't crashed phillip island 2009'#but like... both those mistakes are kinda interesting? also in that era there's no guarantee you'd actually get an interesting race#I had a moment where I was thinking 'oh but you could give sete a win post-2004' and... no? sorry but no#scrolled through all the results from 2000 to 2005 and went 'no these are all Perfect Actually'#I mean maybe I'd steal melandri's wins but that also seems incredibly petty. valentino levels of petty. can't do that#also was thinking mugello 2016 give valentino a functioning engine but that IS already a classic race so I won't touch it#or sachsenring 2012 would've been more fun if casey had not crashed but well. idk it's notable he DOES crash. kinda juicy#or silverstone 2015 marc's crash but to me 2015 is quantum locked like you can't really touch anything there#le mans 2017 pissed me off at the time but also. *shrug* whatever#jerez 2018 + catalunya 2019 were annoying because they ruined an already dire title fight picture#but I can admit how funny those were. especially catalunya#I do also think it's a little bit funny how jorge STILL gets shit over it like that one doesn't have an expiration date I fear#still gets referenced SO regularly. poor jorge
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do you guys think I can successfully change radiator hoses in my car do we believe in me to be resourceful
#my biggest concern is getting the air out after bc appa#you have to burp it and if any air pockets are in there it'll overheat ur engine I'm like 💀#I can't be responsible#also when u take one hose off it like empties out the coolant and I don't want to get coolant all over myself but it will happen#*apparently
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The awesome thing about college is that being there is miserable, and not being there is worse.
Nifty!
#I might be going back to college in September and man. I might just quit lmao#I did engineering courses before and that was genuinely the worst over ever felt in my life#I would genuinely have panic attacks and leave every day#But I couldn't just leave the course because I'd feel like a failure#Which didn't matter anyway cause I failed the course lmao#My new course is business shit and I feel like I'm gonna get stuck in a course I hate again#Technically I was good at business. But that was only because it was continues assessment and my teacher wasn't that good.#Fuck dude#Vent#Yeah this is a vent post if you hadn't figured that out#I just had an interview there and apparently my course has an online class once a week#I might quit for that alone cause I can't fucking stand those#But also I don't wanna work at dunnes for 20 years and then die#But also also I can't work part time and go to college so that means no money#Yeah fuck this lmao#Delete later#Fuck it I've got a drawing tablet now. I'm becoming a full time inflation artist or something. I hear that's good money#Thinking about it more I already struggle with self worth or whatever#And I fucking hate annoying businesses bros so becoming one might make me actively hate myself
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re: live album, didn't john delf post some stories where he showed they were recording the audio for some shows? during the european leg (not sure if that what it was, but it looked like it. i'm not an expert though)
👀 did he?? can anyone confirm or find this, I don't remember! But also even if so they could have been recording it for other reasons, like for example when Joshua uses live audio in his recap vids I bet that is a sound board recording, or maybe they were thinking of releasing live Back To You but then didn't love the recordings and decided to just pop into a studio instead or who knows what else...
#sound board recording: recording the audio that is of what the engineers hear of only what comes through the mics and amps directly#(which is also what everyone is hearing in their in ears this is why louis can't hear the crowd over the music unless he takes them out)#rather than what you get if you just hold up your phone ie the sound that is coming out of the speakers so distorted a bit plus crowd nois#tbh the back to you thing seems likely#but collecting for a live album also feels possible! MAYBE IT WILL HAPPEN#and if so I bet it would be not too far away which would be so exciting#fitf live
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Do people stress reblog?
Is that something people do? Because that is definitely what I am doing right now.
#the mob psycho content wont hold me over for much longer#no matter how much serirei i pump into yhe engine--#WE'RE GONNA CRASH AND BURN!#ABANDON SHIP!#QUICK!#HURRY!!#WE'RE GONNA SINK IF WE STAY ON ANY LONGER!#Where's the Captain?!#JAKE! WHERE'S THE CAPTAIN?!#WHAT DO YOU MEAN HES BACK AT THE WHEEL?!#WE HAVE TO GET HIM OUT OF THERE!!#GO WITHOUT ME. ILL FIND THE CAPTAIN!!#Captain! we have to go.#the captain grips the ships wheel even tighter#tight enough to splinter the wood#I can't leave her#but... but captain! our crew is waiting for us down in the emergency ships!! they are waiting for your command!#No-they wait now for your command.#go#you are the captain now#...#what the fuck#i need to go to bed#where did that come from
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