#I don’t understand many things bc I didn’t find it with English subtitles

[ueinra]

Kartal Tibet as Kemal "Valjean" from SEFILLER (1967) Turkish film adaptation of Les Misérables, set in Turkey

[royal-babey]

1 and 8 for the music quiz if you're still doing it! For all your steps 👀

I am! :D Ty for the ask! :3

All sidesteps, huh? Oh boy xD Here we go!!!

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1 - A song I associate with my muses personality.

Robin Monrosa: Pale White Horse by The Oh Hellos ^^ Kinda soft and sad but with a lot of feeling, esp around feeling like he’s been able to be strong and handle a lot but there’s /something/ unnerving him, always. It’s a process “^^

Avis Faigel: Failure Girl by Kairiki Bear ft Hatsune Miku, covered in English by Oktavia ^^ Avis has a lot of self esteem issues that they cover up by being the peppy/cute/flirtatious one. They truly never feel good enough for anyone, not even themself “^^ So the song feels fitting bc it’s like...Just them hiding their true feelings but not feeling like they can let anyone know?

Cyrus Beccerra: Nightmare by Halsey, covered by Lollia ^^ Cyrus has a lot of anger directed at the world and has felt crushed many times, but every time he’s built himself back up stronger than before and has a very “Fuck the world, come at me” attitude! Very much that deep quote about surviving because the fire inside him burned hotter than the fire around him.

Daniel Basri: Problems by Mother Mother! Honestly it’s hard to think of any specific reasoning xD Maybe that the song is so cheery and upbeat sounding whilst the lyrics a little less so? But hey Dani has learned to make the best out of any situations and find the little things in life that make it worth it to keep going ^^

Lonan Bheíre: World Is Mine by Hatsune Miku, covered again by Lollia! xD It was the very first song I listened to for him and it’s the very first song in his entire playlist. Lonan very much feels like he deserves a lot more than the shit he’s been given and he’s right!!! So give him a cake and a pony and a strong boyfriend with an adorable dog, he deserves it!!! xDD

Now onto the second question! :D

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8 - A song that makes my muse feel nostalgic.

Ready for more feels? xD

Robin Monrosa: Gravity by Sara Bareilles, covered by Annapantsu ^^ Again, the very first song in Robins playlist! It always makes me think about how no matter how hard he tried to stay away from his past, before heartbreak, stay away from Ortega who he loved and still loves, he just can’t. Because Ortega has a certain gravity to him and Robin is always being pulled back to him. And since Ortega was such an important part of his past and now his present again, yeah, nostalgia song!!!

Avis Faigel: Universe Cat Drowning by Kikuomiku0 (English subtitles cuz it’s in Japanese ^^), Avis very much blames themself for Heartbreak in a way, and especially for Anathema’s death. HB, as it did for most sidesteps, really fucked them up “^^ to the point their mindscape is the Heartbreak apartment…(At least until therapy!!!) So yeah, this song is just about them feeling the need to apologise to the world for what happened even if it was in no way shape or form, their fault. I suppose the nostalgia part comes in from them wondering about the life they could have had with Anathema and the rangers had things not gone to shit, you know? “^^

Cyrus Beccerra: Ghost Rule by DECO*27, covered again by Lollia!!! I rly like her covers okay…..Butt anyway, this songs makes me think of how Cyrus, like Avis, also wonders what kind of life he would have had without heartbreak interfering. But it did and so now he knows he’s not the same and he feels a sort of...Guilt? For not being unaffected? And yeah this song would just make him think about the person he was before more trauma happened!!!,,,

Daniel Basri: Heroes Rise by Tomee Profitt ft Sam Tinnesz! Honestly a good Fallen Hero song overall, but this song reminds Dani about how even though he “died”, Sidestep didn’t. Or well, Sidesteps image. People still look up to Sidestep. Remember them. Mourn them, even. Daniel doesn’t understand it but at the same time he does. Because no matter how many times he says Sidestep is dead, it’s just not true. It’ll never be true. And he knows that, and borderline hates it “^^ but also mourns himself, in a way. What he could have been to people. Still have been, that is...

Lonan Bheíre: Arsonist's Lullaby by Hozier! Lonannnnn feels kinda jealous of the world? Like he should have gotten more than he got. He had his choices taken away from him, multiple times in fact, and that infuriates him to no end. The song reminds him of this and makes him wistful for pre-hb, but also makes him think about how his eyes were opened in a way? Though for better or for worse...I don’t know “^^ But if he has to go down again, he’s bringing the world with him.

[advernia]

i’m amazed that i’ve been active for at least a couple days straight??? is it the effect of lesser fe3h playtimes + the silly coworker writing challenge at the workplace??? oh well ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

since i remembered i was trying to make work commentary a thing here, more rambling / author’s notes under the cut!

jul 6th // ikerev

push your way through the cracks is the first edgar/mc i’ve written here and while i’ve mentioned there that edgar is my fav out of the cast, i fear that i’ll probably take me a very long time to write another one bc... he’s my favorite. i noticed i have the tendency not to write much (or have finished works) about ships i really, really like despite... you know, liking them. hopefully not - shipping aside, i like exploring the characterizations of enigmatic types like edgar.

about the fic, i pretty much like it save for the second part bc i think i could’ve done something more with it - not exactly change the setting, but expounded a little further on it. i don’t know, it feels lacking somehow in comparison to the first two.

there are a lot of flower-related descriptions tossed here and there, but i think i succeeded in not being so purple prose-y? hopefully! this was pretty descriptive, i guess.

with this edgar fic present, that means i have 2 more red army doods to write about, namely zero & jonah. i was really aiming to make edgar the last one tho haha.

jul 12th // ikerev

weave me into your web is canon based, specifically pt. 24 of sirius’ route where they say ‘goodbye’. note those quotation marks.

i think i wrote this after a discussion i had with a friend about sirius & his route - she read some posts commenting on the route and she wanted a nearby opinion. we got into an agreement: while we do find sirius to be indeed husbando material, his route would’ve risked nothing if they gave him more / emphasized his flaws. his flaws, not mc’s, gosh. 

no, seriously. in my opinion, mc fretting so much about being immature sort of blinds her from the little things that prove sirius is not so composed as he appears to be. it gets even worse when she realizes she’s fallen in love with him, and while i enjoy the black army going kira-kira rabu support team + seth being hopeless suitor, i’m going 50/50 on mc. she’s written to be indeed very single-minded come the war phase and while that’s not necessarily bad since she gets to broaden her perspective as she always does, i think i would’ve appreciated it if she came to most of the realizations on her own by reflecting on them based on how the events around her are progressing; and not simply by sirius / someone else pointing it out for her. no wonder she’d think she’s immature in comparison - it also irks me a bit that she keeps on fretting about her feelings for sirius. this is what i’d be sad to see again in other routes: the romance overthrowing the potential / present character development. 

side note: i understand that in relationships with a notable age gap, maturity / perceived maturity can be a problem - i just wished that the route downplayed on this bc honestly, there are other things more interesting to explore than that angle, like, say; isn’t she from another culture or world or something????????? will those differences affect our potential relationship??????????????

on sirius himself, i recall reading on reddit that one person didn’t pick up ikerev for the reason that the cast is too perfect. that’s a fair opinion. i think i can relate this to sirius himself: while throughout the route you do see some flaws in him, he’s still overall the dude you’d write home about + that dude you’d dream introducing to your parents complete with that suave voice (thank u junichi suwabe). no, i’m not saying that he has to have some unlikable or quirky trait / wangsty backstory, it’s just that in my opinion he’s desirable but not exactly relatable. let him struggle, let me see him rise up from it. show me his humanity. there’s the scene with him and lancelot, but i want more. tho him being afraid of being alone is what i find extremely relatable and endearing about him, very nice. otherwise... well, maybe i have to reread the route again or smth.

anyway. the fic emphasizes actually on his character trait of self-control / restraint. did u know too much is bad for u??? it can reflect that since you hold yourself back too much, it could mean that you’re masking your true feelings, for example. there are various psychological studies on that. *stares at sirius* hMMM.

i took care to be quite descriptive on that kiss scene and at the same time, not to be so emotional on it bc it’s still sirius lol - i believe he’s not one to lose himself completely to his emotions, but he’s not that afraid to succumb to some of it - especially if he actually wants to feel them.

... this turned out to be a rant portion rather than a fic commentary now didn’t it

aug 24 // ikerev (i’m seeing a pattern here)

a beginner’s guide to waltz was seriously just some formatting experiment, then it blew up to something larger. i actually like it tho, it’s cute.

writing oliver is actually fun, not bc of the reason that i can be rude. he is rude, but he’s not like that for just the sake of being so. as seen with blanc, it’s probably a result of habit. why exactly he chose to be verbally aggressive is something i’d like to know in his route.

i have no idea how the relationship shift is portrayed either, but i do hope it’s a mortifying revelation on mc’s part lol. like, lookie here, that little kid with his wee shorts and pretty hat that you hang out with all the time and don’t care about acting so ladylike around was that hot hunk who saved you before! oliver’s so amused and never letting her live it down.

for the line ‘i’m not interested in asking you about a decision you’ve made since you arrived here’: the decision mentioned is mc’s promise not to fall in love & to go home. i think oliver would be one of those routes where he falls for her but wants her to go home anyway, but the difference in his route is that he’s very adamant to make her leave. maybe thinking along the lines of ‘i don’t want you to end up like me’ or something. idk. idk what i’m trying to type at this point, lol.

just some random thought, but i do hope ikerev artist tcg someday draws mc in the game outfits / hairstyles bc she’s actually rly pretty. the description of mc’s outfits / fashion of part 4 of the fic was out of me just staring at the my closet portion of the game. don’t ask - i like the hc of oliver & mc having elegant wardrobes / fashion sense, and since i’m too lazy to check up 19th century london fashion trends...

sep 28 // collar x malice

haunted by something still alive was the result of me thinking about guns. don’t ask me either. maybe it’s also a result of me wanting to write something else that isn’t from my horrendous drafts folder lol.

these were actually nice drabble practices, and the first one i clearly had i mind was shiraishi’s. i honestly think it would be fitting, probably around the start of the route where they haven’t got to know each other so well.

from there on i tried to do the drabbles in the route order i did when i played the game, which was mineo - sasazuka - okazaki - shiraishi - yanagi. but tbh when i was writing it became shiraishi - mineo - yanagi - sasazuka - yanagi again - okazaki, lol. i rewrote yanagi’s and okazaki’s three times.

subtitles have their respective mathematical operations on it - i find it kind of cool and funny that those are their symbols (amnesia had the card suits), but when you do think of it properly, it does relate to their characters.

... never forget that hoshino ichika is canonically good with guns.

sep 28 // ikerev

in absence of glass slippers as stated was a part of one of my first ikerev drafts. still a draft until now, but the portion i posted is one of the ‘finished’ sections of the fic.

i don’t headcanon mc as a respectable lady from a equally respectable house or her being a well-off girl, but i like the concept of her being a self-taught lady of society aka she learned stuff like manners, dancing, and etc. out of curiosity or for more practical reasons like fitting in. 19th century london is still the victorian era, so social class and propriety was still a thing.

her taking off her shoes to practice dancing with ray is a sort of a challenge, actually... his measure of improvement will be based on the times that he steps on her feet / how many blisters her feet would gain by the end of the session, lolol - that’s why she says that stepping on a rock is the least of her problems. pretty hardcore, isn’t she?

thus the title actually - glass slippers (mary janes actually) are pretty delicate, but don’t you think a lady’s foot is much more delicate?

with ray’s fic up, i’ve officially written a piece for all of the black army men! nice.

sep 29 // ikerev

neither heaven or hell is holy shit, an mc-centered fic! hella rad - i was half thinking to classify it as a drabble, but since i decided that drabbles are pieces that i may get back on, i kept it as a full fic instead since i’m happy with how it turned out.

all of my screamings are in the tags, so i don’t have much to add besides that lol. however, the writing here is pretty different, and that’s because i was trying to do a three sentence fic challenge kind of thing. buuuuut it became three paragraphs with three lengthy sentences instead lol.

also, there’s some stuff highlighting mc’s london-er/english-ness. washing powder is the british term for laundry soap. 19th century roofs for royals were usually panels, and wooden beams for commoners. different as chalk and cheese is a british expression. i’m certainly not british but i just like emphasizing the fact that mc is of another culture/world, thus there should be differences in how she perceives things / her mannerisms & actions / her way of speech. i’ve been conscious of that in all of my fics involving her.

actually, i do make it a point to watch her way of speaking. i really like the polite way of speaking of 19th century britain (and also of today), so i try to integrate that despite the fact that i’m not british myself lol. it’s hard to fully convey it, but i try with hoping that it doesn’t seem too off. i should probably look for more references to practice it.

this was a very spontaneous piece with actually minor editing involved, and i’m pretty proud of how it turned out.

[firebirdsdaughter]

Okay...

Finally sitting down to watch Zi-O ep 4...

Let’s game?

Well, no, actually no, we won’t, but I was trying to be thematic.

And in no particular order:

Okay, that explains it. When I saw the preview images it looked like they were talking to Emu, and then Geiz and Sougo both henshined and took a knee for some reason. It’s actually the other way round.

Geez, Emu. Since when were you this uncommunicative and unhelpful? That’s Taiga’s job!

Like seriously, you know these two are Kamen Riders. Just explain yourself to them instead of making weird vague statements.

Geiz at it again w/ the grump. Have I mentioned--you know where that’s going.

Tsukuyomi w/ the intercede again. I’m liking this trio.

Okay, I wanna know who Goggles is. The guy whose hand Geiz was holding in that future-flashback? A friend? Brother? This being Toei it’s unlikely to be a boyfriend, but it’s still possible. He looks like he mighta been a nice fellow, I’m sorry he died.

I guess this is a lot to take in, and Sougo is generally pretty slow on the uptake, it appears, so... But looks like he’s getting it now.

Tsukuyomi, I really hope you’re aware just how much of a problem child you just decided to adopt.

I actually agree w/ someone else I saw, I think. I kinda wish they would give her a better reason than ‘I don’t know’ for this. Like, I’m liking the idea that she doesn’t want her childhood friend to technically become a murderer by killing someone who is, at that point, still innocent, but this ‘I don’t know’ thing is kinda... meh to me. It doesn’t feel touching or sweet, and is even kinda out of character... But that’s just me. She’s super great, but she otherwise seems so decisive and confident that it’s a little odd.

OH MY GOD IT’S THAT CHURCH! I mean--it’s that wizard Bugster!

Fun fact, that Church is not just a Toei set. I have seen it in about FIVE other shows I think (don’t ask me to name them all, I can’t--but Kaname Jun was in one I think)

AH! Brave is here! But it’s back in 2016, episode... 2? Or maybe 3, but it would be when Hiiro literally just got there, so he’s still an ass. I mean, I still love him. But he was an ass.

Geiz, mister straight forward, just fucking informs them he’s from the future, I love him.

Maybe this has something to do w/ Hiiro’s sense that he should help them before... Aside from grumpy secondary solidarity, ofc.

‘From your perspective,’ Geiz, you are literally from 2068. I’m pretty sure, excepting folks from 2069 onward, that that’s the future from everyone’s perspective.

Also, to get this out of the way: AAAAAAH! SETO IS SO PRETTY! OH MY GOD I LOVE HIM SO MUCH EVEN WHEN HE’S A DICK! AND ESPECIALLY WHEN HE’S NOT!

Note: I don’t love him because he’s a dick, but what I love is grumpy, pretty much jerky characters who come out of that bc they start caring about someone or something (again, in Hiiro’s case). Did that make sense?

Also, I’m actually giggling bc of how much of a pompous ass my grumpy surgeon son was. The fact that this is literally like, right after he first showed up, means that he’s at peak dickishness and it’s really funny to look back.

Kids pulling on Geiz. God, honey, what were you expecting when you put that thing on? Well, at least they’re aware of how goofy it is.

On that note, ARE WE EVER GONNA SEE YOU WITHOUT IT?

Also, dear god, someone get this boy some fashion advice. I’ve SEEN that preview image sweetie. You canNOT dress yourself.

Oh my god, it’s the hospital helipad. Now I’m nostalgic.

Okay. Emu can teleport to game worlds now? Al... Alright then. You know what, whatever.

And Emu’s getting thrown around again. Some things never change. What’s still funny about this is still that Ijima Hiroki is (still) not a short man. He’s 5′ 10″. This, to me, makes how much Emu get’s thrown around utterly hilarious.

See, Emu. This is what happens when you don’t pull a Taiga, and discuss things w/ people. You’re the one who forced Hiiro to learn that, why are you doing it?

Aw, Sougo appreciates that Tsukuyomi is trying to save the future w/out killing him. Good kids.

Where’s that B99 ‘cool motive still murder’ picture? I mean, I know it’s a kid. But dude... You don’t have the right to other people’s lives (or body parts) just bc your son is dying.

Hm... I know people are thinking it’s named after Hiiro, but... What if it’s named after his dad? I mean, Kagami Haima was the director of the hospital, he had to start somewhere. To me that feels more logical? Bc it’s only been two years since Ex-Aid, that’s awfully fast to name a medical procedure... But it’s just a thought.

You know what, I bet Hiiro feels bad for brushing Geiz off in the past, so now he’s like ‘I must do everything I can to help these kids out bc when I met them before I was a jerk.’ Part of his ‘stop being an anti-social grump’ attempt. And he’s worried about Emu.

Does the Time Majin have an AI? How did it know to fly up to the roof right then? Is it telepathically connected to Sougo now?

So Uhr is helping Ora/Hora out? Maybe there is hope for a villain-family dynamic after all...

Also apparently that’s Takeru’s mech? Takeru has a mech? I really need to finish Ghost... But it’s either just for the sake of cameo, or it’s related to how Geiz got the Ghost Ride Watch. Now I’m wondering if he maybe stole the Drive and Ghost Watches from the Time Jackers? But if that’s the case, why did they have them? They usually use the Another Rider Watches...? Are Takeru and Shinnosuke okay? Oh my god, did Takeru die again? Actually, I guess Shinnoksuke also died a lot in that one movie so... Oh dear.

Is Sougo transforming in tiny spaces gonna be a thing now?

Come to think... Since the opening, we haven’t seen Woz. What’s prophet boy up to?

This tiny gremlin child who I adore and want to pinch the cheeks of just giggling to himself in his busted mech like a five year old.

Sorry, Geiz, you can’t beat the bounce.

Sougo just fucking slams this thing w/ the Time Majin.

And so, the path toward very reluctant and at first very awkward friendship begins. Let’s a-go kids!

But also god that boy is skinny. Honey, do you even HAVE hips? Are you okay?

Geiz is having feelings but is very confused right now. Punching things is generally a good venting method.

And the boys are still very bad at not being good at teamwork. Like, they’re already synchronising in pretty much every fight they’ve been in--not just in henshins but in attacks and so on.

Emu that looks NOTHING LIKE YOU, WHY would you call it a doppelgänger.

Since this is after Hiiro first showed up, it means that the two of them still don’t like each other (bc it took them a while to get there), so I’m not surprised that he wouldn’t call Hiiro immediately if something came up. Plus this may not show up bc CR relied on reports by witnesses and were in an abandoned warehouse. But then why is Emu...? Oh, I don’t know.

Was his henshin really always that deep?

Oh! There he is! Woz! I was wondering where you were! So, uh... Where were you?

Geiz: ‘Oh no, not again!’

Wow, he did the hoppity hop thing!

HE HAS GIANT BUMPS ON HIS ARMS! I LOVE THE GIANT BUMPERS ON HIS ARMS!

(I think they’re meant to be buttons?)

Aaaaand, right on cue, there Woz goes again.

Emu just like ‘okay then, let’s roll w/ this then, I guess!’

Wait, but the Brave and Snipe (and Genm, and then there’s Para-DX, and Poppy, and Cronus... Though I guess those last ones may not end up existing since they’re post-this?) Watches don’t seem to be in-show, so... Does that mean that Hiiro and Taiga keep their powers? Bc there was a Crozz-Z Ride Watch, so I now understand Ryuuga losing his, but there were so many Riders in Ex-Aid... Though maybe there’s a whole butterfly thing that simply by removing the primary everything is effected. Bc if you had to account for each individual Rider... Imagine how complex and difficult shows like Ryuki and Gaim would be to explain/sort through.

Hiroki has such a nice smile. Actually, pretty much everyone is Ex-Aid had a nice smile when they smiled.

Oh, god, yes. I really hope that the Rider trying to teach Sougo how to do the finisher in some way (miming for Emu, explaining for Sento) is a thing every time... Though I guess since they couldn’t get Gentaro we won’t get to see him do it... But maybe Takumi will? (I’ve never actually watched Faiz, so I have no idea what the finisher looks like)

Oh, hey. When Sougo hits him it says it in... Kanji, I think? But in Japanese characters of some kind instead of English.

ATTACK OF THE SUBTITLES!

Geiz standing of to the side trying to act cool while these two dorks help this man up.

... He’s wearing socks and... You know what, this is Japan. They’re probably his shoes for inside, and because he was running out to the ambulance with his dying son, he didn’t bother to change.

I love how Emu is like ‘who could we possibly... OH! That asshole!’ (again bc this is the very early season, back hen we didn’t like each other)

HE SAID IT! I guess they cut away so Seto didn’t actually have to eat the cake. Apparent he doesn’t actually like sweets? Maybe bc he’s such a sweetie. ^^

I really love it when the ones playing the ‘serious grumps’ are really adorably dorky and super nice. Like apparently, Seto was the funny and fun one, which I find so cute and hilarious.

Sougo here, getting into the groove of things during his second rodeo.

Emu’s like ‘are you two together?’ and Geiz is like ‘someone shoot me.’

Awwww. Of course Hiiro saved him. Though they haven’t shown us anything yet... So, maybe, even in the altered timeline, he and Emu still ends dup becoming close somehow? Can I pretend that’s the case? Seriously, Hiiro needs that kid. Otherwise he’s just gonna continue forgetting how to be human.

Why do you need another plate? But I think it’s cute how Junichiro is making so much food. I wonder if it’ll be like Mario in Zyuohger, where when he find out (if he doesn’t already know) he decides to just make life at the shop as homey as possible.

Geiz, maybe you should start using his name? Just to, you know, keep Uncle from getting suspicious?

ALSO WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING WHY... I just can’t anymore. I love my dorky fashion disaster assassin son.

Here we are w/ the intense staring again. Wouldn’t be KR w/out it.

Geiz and Tsukuyomi be like ‘wow no pressure.’ Seriously, Geiz looks like he’s having a small panic attack back there.

He looks very pretty, though.

Aw, they’re keeping their Ride Watches together!

Well, there’s clearly a friendship theme, so I’m hoping there’s a level of deepening the bonds that just started forming in this episode. Unfortunately, I know nothing about Faiz other than apparently Kaixa is a horrible person (given that the preview images imply he’s strangling some poor girl, I am inclined to agree), so I can’t make any guesses there.

All I ask for Christmas is ONE episode where Geiz doesn’t wear that damn collar thing. I know it’s only been four eps but just ONE.

And, in final news, looks like they’re switching the Watches around.

Okay! Well, that's that for now. Now, my head hurts and I still want pizza, so... Not much else to say. Imaginary pizza for anyone who read all of this, you really didn’t need to do that.

I’m gonna pretend Hiiro and Emu are still friends somehow. Having a good time here, looks like we’re looking at another solid trio and I love it. Also, w/ OOO and Ghost apparently coming up... Good times.

[morifinwes]

hi laura!! sorry this is a bit late i barely survived finals week :’) i just woke up after sleeping for like 18 hrs after my last exam fjdns

oooo yes i love yanqing too!! they’re my fav ship apart from wangxian (also jc/lwj w h a t why would anyone do that o.O)

halsey!!!! i love her sm i’ve followed her from the time she released badlands (i was such an emo kid istg that album was everything to me) omg your music taste is so similar to mine wtf??? the other side by ruelle AND mystery of love AND folklore ur taste is exquisite. i’ll check out the other songs i’m sure i’ll like them! (also based on your music taste i recommend u listen to the loch ness monster by matilda mann 10/10 would recommend)

okay today’s questions!

🎀 since i asked about non-canon ships last time, what is your favourite fic you’ve ever read in the mdzs fandom? or a favourite trope?

🎀 tell me about your favourite show(s)/movies other than cql/mdzs! i need something to binge watch over winter break hehe

hope you’re doing well! it’s getting cold where i live so if it’s the same where you live i hope you’re staying warm >.< now that i’m free i will try to send asks more often! - 🍵

hey c!! don't worry, you have to take care of yourself, i'm glad that you finally have more time for yourself too!

sleeping 18 hours after being stressed is valid, after a panick attack i once slept like 16 hours simply because i was extremely exhausted.

i listened to the song and it's!!! so good!! i really like this part of the song: now you've faded, / with no traces, /so who could ever tell. / what you've taken's, / been misplaced / but your name doesn't ring any bells, / since the day that they took you to hell.

halsey is!!! i remember hearing badlands when it came out but i only really got into her mid 2018? i listened to hopeless fountain kingdom then and realized that badlands and hfk where both from the same person!! folklore is @/keepyourlife's fault, annika reblogged a bunch of things and just went crazy over it, so i listened to it. i don't listen to much else from taylor, i like getaway car a lot tho tbh. i saw mystery of love in a wangxian edit on youtube and went !!!!!! over that song, so now i'm obsessed with it.

1. i've got a bunch of favorite fics but _none of them are finished _and ajdkskks i do have some that are finished but i can't remember for the life of me what they're called. so here are five of my favorites: love, in fire and blood by cicer (which i'm recommending to all of my mutuals always) which is a 212K wip of immortal/yp!wwx + war prize au with no rpe/noncon but in the first two chapters lwj is afraid of that happening. it doesn't. then there is this time/universe/dimension travel fic called a song to bring you home by neoserenity, where basically canon!lwj who mourns wwx meets a modern!sick wwx and apparently there is no modern equivalent of lwj? or at least wwx doesn't seem to know one. the updates are sparse but i reread this so often in hopes that updates will appear. an arrow through time by syrus_jones is a young!lwj time traveling to post canon mdzs and pining after "husband" and wwx at the same time and feeling guilty over it bcs he doesn't know wwx is "husband" and then there is the murder of crows by cerbykerby which is a yilingwei sect au. here is a modern office au: hello, IT. have you tried turning it off and on again?* **by overmountainandmeadow, which us just really funny so i've been reading this for stress relief. i actually quote like time travel aus? also just wangxian meeting other versions of themselves is fun!! i have a bunch of modern college au tabs open but i don't actually seek them out, if i see one and like the plot then i'll read it. there are a lot of good time travel aus in this fandom!! also i like it when people get wangxian together earlier than in canon, it's just really fun to see how that would go. i don't remember the name but i think there was one fic where lwj tried to flirt with wwx and wwx just didn't notice? until somebody pointed it out to him i think? that was fun to read because lwj was just so frustrated!!

2. i feel like i forget what shows i watched after i watched them? movies too, though i like to stick to rewatching movies i already know. but here are some shows: dark on netflix, if you have netflix it should be there, it's a german netflix show about time travel and fate and things being really fucked up. basically there is this endless loop of the world apocalypse happening in 2019? 2020? i'm not that sure of the timeline rn but it's either 2019 or 2020!! and jonas, the male lead, wants to prevent it but this shit gets complicated because this is a time loop, everything he has done has been done before him. there are some really great quotes in the show about things, there is a wangxian gifset that actually uses a quote from dark, and that's the one about having three deaths. (i'll probably add a link to the gifset when i find it) also martha, the female lead, seems not that important in the first season but don't be fooled by that. the ending is.... complex and cool and holy shit there is still one thing we don't know and ahdkksks it's a surprise tho so 👀👀. i recommend watching it in german if possible and with subtitles. i've watched a few scenes in english and idk the voice actors don't seen to fit, but i don't know about other languages. the 100 is also a pretty good show but it's.... it has queerbaiting. and to be honest, the queerbaiting is probably the only reason the show made it to a seventh season. lexa, a lesbian, dies and they use her death for the queerbaiting since she gets together with clarke, the lead character. clarke is a character that gets a lot of hate from both fandom and the characters, a lot of unfair hate if you ask me. she has to do a lot of decisions that are just not meant to be for a single human being, @/solntserises and i and a lot of arguements over placing the blame on her or placing the blame on society and the situation itself. clarke basically does what she needs to do, what she needs to do in order to protect her people, her friends, her family. she often just doesn't have good options, and if she has then she deems the risk too high or something too good to be true (which, she often is right about???). after s1 her friends push her into situations where she has to make the hard choice, but if it doesn't work out how they want it to work out they get mad at her. which is not fair. i remember hearing that raven finally understands what clarke goes through in s7? but i haven't watched the season. i gave up the moment lexa died and didn't want to watch past it, but when @/solntserises started we watched the other seasons together.

there is also shadowhunters which is an okay show ig, i've watched vikings until s5 too and i quite liked it, prison break has a lot of cool stuff to offer but i'd be careful watching it in case of any triggers you might have. i don't remember 100% of the plot but enough to say that one of the characters is a pervert and an awful person, so lots of murder, a lot of blood and yeah. the two main characters are brothers and mostly innocent in this but yeah. they break out of a prison y'know.

lucifer is !!! i think it goes after dc comics? so ig it's somehow part of the dceu but they're like.... never mentioned so idk. it's really fun tho!! you probably have heard from the vampire diaries right? yeah well, there is a spin off called the origianls and it's actually really good. it had some times where i was going to call it off but it's fine, legacies is both tvd's and to's spinoff and from the quality it can't really compare, it's still fun to watch and seeing the new generation grow up. (also a lot more canon gays)

for some movies: i don't really watch many but i've watched every movie in the mcu so far, i have the extended special editions for both the lord of the rings and the hobbit trilogy, the half of it is about ellie chu, an asian girl living in a small town with her depressed dad and falling in love with aster flores, and just.... finding herself, finding out what she wants, who she is and trying to figure out where life takes her. the movie is great!! the romance process is really slow and not that much of the main focus, but more of ellie finding her place in the world? the old guard is a fantastic movie that i watched because of @/keiraknigthly, it's really fun to watch!!

i look forward to talking to you more often!! 🥰💞

[nickcutler]

this is a post about autistic traits, autistic coding, and L from death note.

when i say autistic coding or autistic coded, i’m referring to a character having autistic traits such that it is reasonable to interpret them as autistic. this can mean a lot of things, and the coding doesn’t have to be intentional to be present. so when i say that L is an autistic coded character, i’m not saying he’s autistic in canon or he was written to be autistic, but that he comes across that way regardless of intention.

also i have only finished the anime, not the manga, so i’m talking primarily about the anime here bc that’s what i have experience with.

SO. firstable L is an autistic coded character. there’s a lot about him that supports this interpretation; he often responds in atypical ways to social cues, he focuses deeply and intently on what he does, he thinks in unique ways that allow him to solve cases when other people can’t, and i would argue that a lot of his physical mannerisms (biting his thumb, not wearing shoes, the way he sits) could be read as autistic coding as well.

the super smart detective being autistic isn’t really a new phenomenon, so i’m sure this probably isn’t hard for a lot of people to accept as a reasonable interpretation. the stereotypical autistic detective is a character who is 1) very smart 2) "quirky” in some way and 3) often very robotic. what is interesting to me about these characters is how fandom tends to interact with them and which autistic traits fandom is okay with and which ones they aren’t (obviously no fandom is a monolith but i’m saying fandom for ease in discussing this). near is also very autistic coded, and in the like. what few weeks? that i have been engaging with death note i have seen some very. imo questionable interpretations of L’s character that i think are particularly interesting when you consider autistic coding and when you contrast him with near.

i tend to really love autistic characters bc i relate to them, so a lot of my faves are autistic coded. bc of this i have seen the same things repeated over and over again in different fandoms, and most recently when i got into death note. death note, however, is one of the places where i have seen it the worst. basically, fandom is comfortable with/likes L’s quirky autistic traits. his mannerisms, his fixations, his tendency to say maybe inappropriate or blunt things. people like those aspects of him. he’s amusing. 

but when it comes to dealing with emotions i find people don’t like L or say things about him that seem untrue to me based on my understanding of him as autistic. 

an example: i saw a thread about how L didn’t really mean it when he said that light was his first friend (in general i see a lot of posts saying L never means anything or L lies all the time). i was kind of shocked when i saw it because to me, it seemed obvious that he meant it. L has never had peers that he could relate to; light was the first. even though he suspected he was kira, he still liked having that relationship where he could engage with someone on his level. and it would never have occurred to me to consider him insincere when he said it, because the way he expresses himself is very akin to the way i express myself. it’s difficult and i often don’t have the words for it and when i do talk about my emotions it usually comes in a burst when i can get something out that’s not just “hm i don’t know it’s like i don’t know you know?”

and that’s how i read L in that scene. he’s not just saying that to throw light off or to cause a stir, he means it, and he’s conflicted about what it might mean because he thinks light is kira. he’s struggling with that, just like he says he is.

i saw another post that said the reason L was shaking when aizawa yelled at him after ukita died wasn’t because he was upset about it but because he was scared of himself dying, but again, i didn’t interpret it that way at all. obviously in watching the anime with english subtitles and reading the manga in english i’m getting translations so i can’t say for sure that the true intent of the original dialogue is always captured, but in both L specifically says “if YOU go over there too”. he isn’t worried about himself, he’s worried about the rest of the task force and he is upset that ukita is dead. his seemingly calm level-headed approach isn’t him being callous, it’s how he deals with his emotions; for the sake of the case, yes, but also because he doesn’t know how to confront them and certainly not how to express them outwardly. 

and this sort of gets at the heart of what i see happening with him. he has emotions and he expresses them in a way that is consistent with his autistic coding. he’s not just a quirky weird guy who can solve crimes, he’s a human whose feelings get involved. and from what i’ve seen fandom doesn’t like that? i’ve seen so many more harsh posts about L than i have about any other character. L is a liar, L is manipulative, L never means anything he says, L is a bad person. and while he has done bad things, a Lot of the criticism i see falls into the category of being unnecessarily harsh, particularly when you consider i’ve almost never seen posts like that about other characters, and i’ve seen a lot of posts on a lot of blogs since i got into death note.

for contrast, look at how fandom interprets near. near is also heavily autistic coded, with the key difference from L being that he doesn’t really have much of an emotional arc. he’s smart, he’s funny, he twirls his hair and plays with his toys. even when the SPK is killed, he doesn’t react emotionally at all in the anime, and there isn’t much more to his reaction in the manga. he says it hurts, but that’s the extent of it. his emotions aren’t dealt with concretely, just represented by his dice tower falling apart. for the most part near is pretty much the autistic robotic genius detective in canon. and fandom does not have the same issues with him as they do with L. he fits the mold.

so i guess the long and short of it, to be blunt about it, is fandom doesn’t like autistic characters to be autistic when it comes to their emotions. the funny geniuses with their weird mannerisms are okay, but as soon as messy emotions get involved fandom turns on autistic characters. i’ve seen all kinds of posts about things L did that emotionally impacted other people, but very few about how anything emotionally impacted him. and that’s. a problem. it’s all well and good to like those other things about L, because i like them too, but when there’s so much negativity towards him when he deviates from the stereotype, that’s alarming to me. 

and ofc i don’t think anyone is sitting there going “oh i hate this character because he’s autistic and has emotions”, because i know thats not the case. but i think it’s important to maybe realize the implications of some of these claims. L isn’t wrong for dealing with his emotions in his own way, and he deserves as much leeway as any of the other characters get because, as people often say, there are a lot of gray areas in this show. and like i said, i don’t just see this in death note. every autistic coded character i’ve ever loved gets similar reactions, just not necessarily to such extremes. but it’s worth considering if you value autistic characters as people with feelings rather than amusing robotic figures who do funny things because real autistic people are out here and we can get the message.