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maybe if i just put these screenshots together youll understand why i think their relationship just Works so well as it pertains to the characters and themes of S4 in general
neither of them know what theyre doing, but theyre figuring it out Together. the old ways are dead. and together theyll build a new future thats worth fighting for
#twdg#violentine#clems “i dont know” paired with violets “lets figure it out together”. screaming crying throwing up#clem never knew what she was doing!! she was just trying her best!! and now shes tired as SHIT!!! she wants a break 😭!!!#vi helps take that weight off by supporting her as much as she does (which is A LOT!! and clem supports her in return. they grow together)#that bit in the woods where instead of getting grossed out by the guts vi crouches down to ajs level and keeps the situation calm#and she looks up to clem and gives her a little smile. and clem just relaxes and smiles back !! DO YOU UNDERSTAND !!!#clem being anxious about her reaction. violet putting her at ease. clem getting to Relax for 2 seconds. they help each other CHILL 😭#ALSO why their walk home talking about ericson and renaming it and imagining what they could add to it is just so good narratively#they turned that prison into their HOME!! a place worth fighting for!!!#tenn wanting to help rebuild. vi saying Everyone will :') its a home for ALL OF THEM 😭 its about the COMMUNITY !!!#this is also why i think the friends route still works but theres just even more Juice with the romance. even ignoring minnie#violets “you better not disappear on me”. friended clems “ok” to romanced clems “i promise”#in a season about building a home and a family that second one just hits harder you know? and like above with the learning to dance#i just feel like their romantic relationship specifically fits into the overall themes of the game the strongest and elevates it#me talking at the wall (tumblr drafts)#all of my friends who have played twdg are too normie so i gotta make posts like this instead. or i'll die#wont somebody analyze narrative with me#it speaks
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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Hot take here but...
Like I know this is Tumblr. This is the autism site.
So of course I knew everyone would side with Laios on this and empathize more with him but its driving me insane how everybodys saying Toshiro was completely on the wrong here and he should have communicated better and talked about his grievances with Laios WHEN THE WHOLE POINT OF THIS IS THEY WERE BOTH ON WRONG HERE.
LIKE THERES A REASON CHILCHUCK BRINGS UP HOW LAIOS SHOULD WORK ON HIS SOCIAL SKILLS A COUPLE OF EPISODES AGO/JUST BEFORE THIS HAPPENS?
like I know most of you don't like it but social cues ARE a part of society culture. Social cues ARE a form of communication.
In fact they were made to facilitate communication.
They were made so everytime Alice and Bob annoy each other they don't have to go and have a heart to heart when a simple gesture can have the same effect.
In fact sometimes better because sometimes addressing something with words makes it come out stronger/ruder than it is.
And sometimes just like you have problems understanding social cues some people have problems speaking, finding the way to words their thoughts/feelings correctly.
Specially among strangers where you don't know the others personality or how they could react to your words.
That's where social cues, that are general rules the majority of people have agreed on, work. To facilitate convivence.
And yeah there's an argument to be said about how you are supposed to know them if they are unspoken rules and the thing is YOU LEARN THEM THROUGH SOCIAL INTERACTION, through living in a society.
Just like gender norms and the like you don't learn them in school during a boring lecture where a professor lists them on the board. You learn them through interaction and repetition, throught observing your peers. Just like learning to talk and walk and other stuff. Heck, your parents and other adults around are supposed to ease you into it.
And yes, it's not a perfect system. But nothing is.
The saying 'communication is the key' doesn't refer to just talking.
Social cues and other non spoken gestures are also another form of communicating. Equally as valid as all the others
There's beauty in talking and openly expressing your love to someone. Or your grievances.
But there's also beauty in grabbing someones arm or the you picking up your friend is uncomfortable due to the turnup of their mouth or the way they stand.
One isn't superior to other. They are supposed to complement each other
Laios and Toshiros mistakes were relying completely in one or the other instead a compromising and finding a middle point.
Toshiro should have expressed his annoyance at Laios.
And Laios should have picked better Toshiros signs of discomfort.
(All of this isn't even taking into account how they come from different cultures and shock it comes with it because others have talked better about it and I wanted to focus on this. On how even if they have from the same background Laios should have also been a fault.
Hell not only social cues even talking is affected by ones cultural background. What for me is normal could come out as rude for someone in Japan)
#dungeon meshi#i was going to say more about how non spoken cues are another important form of comunication#and how theres beauty in it and why sometimes its preferred over easier ways like talking (THE JEST THE PLAY THE AMBIGUITY#THE IF YOU KNOW ME... ITS LIKE POETRY IN ACTION JUST LIKE WORDSPLAY)#but i lost the steam#also this hit too close to home and it made me realize why im angry at my friends so thank you laios and shuro for serving#as an external mechanism i could use to analyze the situation clearer#dont even dare try to assume whats going when whta im talking about takes years of context#also dont even dare to say im discriminating against autistic folk#me saying autistic folk should work on their social skills even though is difficult is the same as saying adhd should work on their#organizing skills even if its difficult because the consequences will still be there anyway and one must#hold themselves accountable og their actions even if they were cause by stuff we cant help
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there needs to be more games where you play as cats
#doodlie!#off game#off home#the judge#the judge off#pablo off#alain#alain off home#valerie#valerie off#jozlyn#jozlyn off home#from the lynx herself#october 7th#man i could effectively ignore the battling in off because the auto-battler made it much less stressful#but home is MUCH more stressful from having everything hit like a freight train#i dont think i even got to the end of home when i played it in 2019#because basic mooks were flattening me#and level grinding was awful#and i gave up#i want to try it again but i need to know what to even do#i heard theres alternate endings but more different than offs alternate endings
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not to be a milennial but harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban really is that bitch....
#mom wanted to rewatch the movies so we've been going thru them <3#talk about a movie thats just like. grief. i turn into the jamie lee curtis halloween trauma supercut#SORRY..... the visuals are peak like that IS the hp vibe to ME and i am BLOWN AWAY this movie was made in 2004 it feels ahead of its time#the first two are so whimsical and magical enrapturing and this movie is like. a well worn cardigan. this feels 2011 cozycore to me#sorry but the introduction of lupin becoming a comforting trusted guardian type of figure AND the dementors representing hollow depression#this 13 yr old whos been kept in the dark on so many things being extra vulnerable prey to them bc of the severe trauma#but getting lessons on how to withstand that creeping dread.. through happy memories... still bonding w lupin increasngly ouagh...#the grief between them both over james and lily. also btw ofc defense against the dark arts being fighting yr fears through laughter. aaaaaa#and then sirius. black. im. i know we meme on the twelve years of it! in azkaban! but as a bitch whos now closer to those characters in age#and can appreciate and understand them obv more than i could when i was. a tween. that just hits like ok shit. VALID#so valid and real to see the child of your friends you knew at that age but who DIED and then see the friend who betrayed them#to see like the best of BOTH of them mirrored and living on in him and be like yknow what???? you WILL be protected frm that same fate#hoooo the briefest moment where harry might hope things will turn out okay. w sirius' name being cleared and peter having to explain himself#and sirius being like hey i get it if you want to stay w your family that is fine but. if you wanna move in w me...#(harry relaying this to hermione later as well. dreaming of a place fr just the two of them somewhere in the countryside#somewhere..... sirius might see the sky..... bc he thinks he would like that after all those years locked up do not even touch me rn.......)#only fr everything to turn to shit two friends fighting w deadly force. the chance to set this right slipping off into the night.#a million dementors descending relentlessly until utter exhaustion and certain death. some strange salvation? fight for a second chance?#but then still havign to say goodbye when they only just GOT this. and everything still being so. god. and lupin having to leave as well.#the thought of sirius also WANTING that guardian type connection but being forced to live in 1. a cave barely living more freely than before#2. then being confined to the stuffy somber abusive home he ran away from as a teen w that portrait still up there and everything.. bitch...#oh man the way i KNOW when we get to ootp (my favourite) its gonna leave me blasted into a million little pieces#the way i know shit like the knowing wink the entirety of the wall tapestry room scene and of course nice one james is gonna DESTROY me..#dont even talk to me abt that dark turn at the end of gof and how everything after gets soooo. god. w everything just getting destroyed and.#i cant even think abt it i cant even talk about it. wah#i dont care btw that they aged those guys up undermining how insanely young these people died. perfect casting fr the remaining marauders ok
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Getting told that it's not possible for you to be on the spectrum or if you are you adapted too well so whatever, it doesn't bother you
#bitter laughter#man i adapted so well i come home i do nothing and feel tired to no end#so adaptable i only know social rules for acquaintances#(*detail: my family is the one who said so - not seeing a professional yet we're lacking every kind of doctors in this country)#man i so well adapted when i hit my limit i cant talk and can barely move#im soooo normal i dont develop deep obsession for one(1) thing for years on end where it occupies my thoughts at all time#sometimes i cant do smth else bc thinking about it is just far more better and i cant shift my focus to what is 'more urgent'#rant#everything is fine everything is fine#ill get there eventually#i guess i do be adaptable but i dont know to which level ill keep being#im dreading the crash. im dreading the wall im gonna get directly on my face at full speed
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i think i'm going to distract myself by updating my blog theme. something nice and autumn-y. i dont think i've ever had a color scheme like that before.
#tara says stuff#i wasnt even a 1d fan but the news of liam's death rlly shook me#things have been rlly rough for me this year#even just earlier this month i lost a very dear member of my family and i think all THIS—#the news that someone so young who went through so much hardship died probably feeling so so unfulfilled#—is hitting a little too close to home#my cat is laying on my chest and my dog is at my feet#how many more times will we get to be together like this?#how many more times will i get to tell my mom that i love her after she comes home from work?#i dont know. and that scares me#i feel like i have so much to do and so many people to love but that there will never be enough time#i guess thats why i have to make the most of what time i DO have#or at least try to#but for now#i need to distract myself#vent
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so i watched i saw the tv glow
it hit me a lot heavier and alot more personal than i thought it would.
#my doodles#cicidraws#happy pride month huh. sdfd#still time. theres still time yes#but to think i have to stay in the closet right now and do not have a support system at home that is abusive#it just is so so hard and hit hard#i wish i had the access adn funds and good enoug hhealth to get top surgery and hormones#blahh#it put me in a big spiral and now im just crying like a babyi#god what a good movie it is though#it hit personally too just reminding me how awkward i was as a kid too in school#self scribbles -#im forever happy and proud of others that some ppl get access to support and care and surgery hrt etc#but i also feel consistently jealous and achy inside that ill never get that in my lifetime probably.#i dont know how many more times i can apply to that top surgery fund.
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hey guys sorry for the radio silence (4 days) :( Im Sick
but in other news: almost at 200 followers!!!! so if any of you want me to do the same thing i did last time (maybe not as much) or something different i can to celebrate :) since i should be free to draw however much after this week (have some things to take care of (while im sick))
#ill finish doing asks when i get back home (dont know when)#and then when i hit 200 ill do another thing i guess? maybe pcs again or maybe ill draw other peoples dol designs but problem with that is#i Dont Know Many People Here 😰#i only follow legit like 5 people and i dont check this dashboard often so i miss a lot#since i usually use my main tumblr to yknow. scroll through tumblr#i wish i could reblog other peoples art more often too but for some reason i get nervous? its so weird. i get nervous writing tags#probably because i get too excited and then i get a headache#what was this about again#oh#if any of you have anything you want me to do for 200 you can send an ask or something and ill make a poll so you all can vote on it maybe#but hopefully i can do it like order as in: finish asks i have now > celebrate yay!! > draw more designs lmao#but before all of that. i have to finish this one thing. lemon honey green tea give me the strength i need to finish this.#i need to clear out ageless followers when i get home too :( so i might not be that close after that#right now im 8 away from 200 i think?#but thank you to whoevers followed me :)#if you dont have an age in your bio remember to put one okay? or ill get another headache#i think thats all i have to say right now? if you have any questions comments or concerns please dont be afraid of me.#germaphone#i promise i dont bite. i kind of gnaw like a toothless cat. its all gums and its slimy and feels weird. like that#200 follower special you all ask me about my teeth situation (nothing special really)
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Not to be sappy on main but Alexa what are you supposed to do when the boy you've been deeply madly crazily in love with for 3+ years starts giving hints(or maybe im just looking too much into it) that he maybe probably likes you too??????
#listen im so madly in love with this idiot in my class who was also my best friend for like almost 2 years before covid hit#we somehow completely lost touch during the lockdown and I have neverissed someone more in my entire life#the almost 2 years at home also made me realise how much I love with him#after the lock down finally ended I found out that he's moved to another fucking CITY#the universe seems to like me because we started texting again a few months ago#and now he keeps doing some thing that make me think that he has feelings for me and I dont know what to do about it#I legit feel like im living like a 100 chapter slow burn fic (possibly one-sided??)#and its fucking frustrating#I know this is all a little too personal but I have been keeping it in for way too long and need to get it off my chest a little#byler#not byler related at all but I just love you guys way too much#vent#there are way too many typos in the tags but im way too tired to fix them
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I've got two family events coming up during term time and I'm trying to decide if the trips are worth the cost by asking if my family is actually going to be attending them and my mum's response was 'I might be able to convince your dad if we know you're going :)' girl I'm not spending nearly £60 just to come down for the weekend only to then find out I'm going by myself
#+Extra#travel tag#one of my cousins has a babyshower coming up in may on a Sunday when i have class on Monday#i already know my mum isnt intending to go to that one and my aunt that lives in between me and them also isnt going so i cant go with them#its the most inconvenient of the two and i have to be home a week after so ive declined that one#but another cousin recently announced an engagement/housing warming party weekend at the end of april#and when my mum told me about it i asked if she was going so i knew whether or not to look into tickets#and she hit me with the 'might go if you do :)' girl im not risking £60 on a maybe especially cus getting there will be a nightmare#its not all the way down south with the rest of my family so its technically closer but if im travelling there i need to know#whether to come early and go all the way home so i can arrive with my family on the day or travel down the day of & get there a little late#in the day in the city where its happening and figure out how to get to the event by myself and sort out getting ready and everything#or like to not bother what so ever and theres no guarantee which day theyll go cus its both Saturday and/or Sunday#ideally id only go Saturday cus i got class first thing monday but i also dont wanna be there by myself#im not close with my cousins and my dad doesnt get along with my mums side of the family so its highly likely id be there by myself#which i absolutely do not want especially if im getting there late cus of relying on public transport#edit: itll cost between £50-£120 to travel o.o depending on how i travel#if i get the train the whole way cus its quicker and times are more convenient itll cost £120 for a return for a 3 hour trip#or i could spend £40ish to get there by train then £10 on an overnight coach back#which is cheaper than the £60ish it would cost to get coaches both ways and the travel times for coaches were ridiculous#but jesus christ 🤦♀️
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#gotta say (but not trying to guess or explain even if there are a few theories in my brain)#that everything happening these past weeks really is curious and it’s going to be interesting to see what happens next esp in potentially#looking at why babygate was so terribly ramped up during louis’ promo#because you have that in a quite unparalleled way but then you have Eleanor not being mentioned once like#literally danielled#and then you have the way fitf is queer#and then suddenly it becomes very clear that harry is no longer blacklisted in louis’ interviews and you have a syndicated press release#about louis struggling with fatherhood and few days later there is article upon article about louis on his ‘brother’s’ success#at a time when mp came out and with all the comparisons people are making with larry one would think they’d shun this but apparently not?#and then you have louis saying harry hits too close to home which still was a formulation for the books skmsk#and then you have holivia BUA which we expected around this time but louis’ 1 more day tweet makes it even funnier ngl#and you have gemma and lottie interacting on social media more (although there’s been something here and there before)#and there was even sth about harry on the twins’ igs a few weeks back or sth i dont know i dont follow them#but like no matter whether this is it and they’re just changing up the nemesis narrative or whether there are going to be further#developments#there definitely is some kind of a shift and it may end here or it may not but there definitely is sth happening
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Every once and a while the concept of language just messes me up. Like a few minutes ago my coworker turned to me and asked me how to say the name of our planet in English. And even though we've helped each other out with words in both our languages (Spanish and English) before, that one in particular hit me like a bucket of warm water. Like as he repeated it, struggling over the sounds I was just reminded that that's what language is. We can live in the exact same world, on the same planet, but it can be two different things to us, down to the name of the world we live on! These things are just so insane to me actually. One of the many reasons why I love languages I suppose <3
#also DONT hit me with the 'swishy doesnt know how languages work' bs bc i get the CONCEPT im like 60% bilingual guys. but its the EMOTION#THE FEELING in regards to that one particular word. like i know the name of the planet in 2 (.5?) languages not counting english plus can#likely recognize a couple more of the latinate ones but its like the emotion of 'hey all of this stuff is made up actually' and that i can#say the word earth and people can not know what that is#BUT ALSO AT THE SAME TIME its the realization that when i say tierra it doesnt mean the same thing as earth to me. like its missing#something because when i say it its so clinical i guess? or like emotionally im not including myself in it. because like earth/tierra as in#the ground like sure. as the planet also sure! but when i say el planeta tierra in my mind i just visualize like 3rd grade science class#like space but NO! thats home!!!! thats me!!!! cuando digo 'todas las personas de la Tierra' estoy una de las personas! estoy aquí!#y a jamas tengo eso sentido de la Tierra como una comunidad... como el mundo no como un planeta en el espacio pero como mi hogar#idk idk idk idk. i love words and also language and also people. if you even get what i mean#blah
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wait no actually i gotta think about this for a second.
#i remember when i was around 7 years old my mom caught me doing something bad and i got hit a few times and afterwards she was like#'listen to me. what happens at home stays at home. dont tell your teachers ANYTHING about us or you'll be taken far away'#and i was a real mamas boy and nothing terrified me more than the idea of being torn from my mother#so i didnt question it. but do you know how angry this memory makes me#i try understanding that my mom had a rough childhood too and maybe she thinks she isnt being abusive#but NO she literally KNOWS that she would be absolutely fucked if i told anyone about how she used to beat me for things like not napping#but oh well. what can a guy do#finn.txt
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my two hours of gameplay review of new sonic game: that rat is not fast enough
#i just dont like that he doesnt seem to carry any momentum#its mostly fine in the overworld but i dont think it helps the speed stages at all#but i havent rlly upgraded speed and i dont have drop dash yet so. we will see#i mean i dont think i have drop dash but it did also take me an hour to find the lightspeed dash input#its weird that u can homing attack from the ground. fucked up and unnatural#the exploration/combat stuff is fun tho i need to figure out what its all about more#feels good to run around and hit things which is the point of the whole thing i think so good job#i think i will like it i just need to complain its simply the nature of the thing. im spoiled by modded srb2#oh and that herding minigame is lame i couldnt believe you got a redacted out of it i was almost ready to just say fuck it#they better not make me do that shit again (knows they will)
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
#need a bestie so bad need to send audio messages and talk and talk all day 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 tired of using this like twt im so sorry#not that on twt i was a hit but at least some ppl would always be there to give me a like to let me know they vibe w me#it's so over to me i cant believe i am like this actually. a woman gave him a lei and he simply kissed her so gently i think im about#to pass tf out#guys guys im NOT new to this i not new to HIM SPECIFICALLY but only now im being crazy abt him this is so unexpected#i actually love when i get hit by a new obsession cuz it's often so random#even my sister was asking me what triggered this entire thing and honestly i just dont know#my friend mentioned that her grandmother likes him a lot and i was like oh me too and then i came back home and blasted some tunes and#here i am i cant stop fixation on him for a second!!!#i wonder if this is gonna be brief or if my destiny is sealed with this mf#and you knwo what??? its kinda silly that he is that great while he was basically an interpreter idek if thats a word. a cover boy.#he did covers but they are all amazingly amazing??? it takes artistry to be this good i really dont get how he did all of that#believe me i feel it his voice is a force. an energetic one idk what he had in him but i feel it so much????? I DONT GET IT#i keep coming back to add tags but holy shit i just need to talk about this here otherwise it will all stay inside and i want to say it!#its like i love him bc of his voice and then when i think about him singing i like it even more cuz i think he is so attractive and for that#his voice gets even better and he gets more handsome?? its like a circle a dialectical relationship it's the fucking combo of the person and#the skill#what a motherfucker!!!!
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