#I just didn't want to type paragraphs-long analysis

[sonic-wildfire]

So I've been thinking about this guy

[lanternmice]

you clearly love them a lot and i am So curious what ur thoughts on seven red suns as a character are. theyre.. kinda mean from what uve seen, but you probably have some great insights!! if this means gushing about your f/o instead of serious analysis i am also in 100% support of that gbjhf

WUAGHHHHH I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN I LIKE THEM SOOOO MUCH i really really want to talk about General interpretations but it's hard because of how obviously biased i am. but. Augh. this is so nothing but it got long and i'm embarrassed so woe read more be upon ye

i gotta start by mentioning that faelings original design & concept for suns (and spearmaster by extension) is sooo important to me and a lot of my personal interp comes from that, comics like this (link to the official discord btw) that they made for example! and though it has arguably less to do with suns, the 1.5 drought mod also has a special place in my heart but if i get too into that i'll start screaming and crying about it. just know that wanderer is so special to me and suns has two kitty cats that they love so much ok?🫶

anyways. i think because of the fact they aren't fleshed out much in canon aside from the spearmaster broadcasts there's a lot left up for the player to decide, which honestly is really fun to me and i genuinely love seeing other peoples interpretations!! but personally because you mentioned it and because i feel kinda strongly about this in particular, i wanna say that i don't think suns is mean, i think they definitely have the potential to be overprotective and intimidating, but it'd almost always be out of love. one thing the broadcasts ARE good at showing is just how much they care about basically everybody around them, even if they're a little.. dense about some things. they way they talk in the chat logs with nsh, about their guilt over pebbles' situation and trying to make up for it even though pebbles clearly doesn't want their help, about dooming not only pebbles but moon as well (who as far as canon text goes, they don't seem to have ever personally talked to moon at all imo). and when nsh stops messaging them, or becomes increasingly worried about moon, they get visibly concerned about his wellbeing as well and does their best to console him. my favourite broadcasts are the ones about their gradual realization that maaaaybe they care about spearmaster a little more than they originally intended to. they raised spearmaster, going as far as to teach it a personally modified sign language rather than a quick and easy one-way mark of communication like most iterators would do. the chat logs after spearmaster encounters pebbles and how worried suns was for it, about how they regret ever sending them to pebbles in the first place, and that they just wished it'd return home to them safely. there's also the fact that they kept an eye on spearmaster with their overseer basically 24/7, to the point that even pebbles knew that suns was watching. overseers can act on their own, we know that from what we see in canon, but pebbles knew that suns was actively watching when spearmaster entered his can. which. god this wasn't supposed to be about pebbles but pebbles not killing spearmaster is something that's so important to me because he so easily could have killed them and there was no reason for him not to. but despite how hurt he was and how wronged he felt, he knew that it would have ruined suns so he held himself back and it's so AAUUGHHHHHH!!!!!!! i love them all so much. this is barely even about suns anymore sorry i didn't mean to type so much about spearmaster i just love their campaign so much. don't even get me started on the thought of ascending as spearmaster that shit will make me start killing people i actually was going to talk about headcanon stuff too (mostly stuff from before the global ascension/after riv) but. i started thinking too hard about suns and pebbles and spearmaster and wanderer and and and. Well sorry but i fear that if i think about rain world any more today i may end up on national television. so maybe another day

[torpedopickle]

I finally watched Transformers Earthspark Season 2 today. I have a lot of thoughts and I wrote some paragraphs for every episode. As you can see I wrote a LOT, enjoy my way too long cartoon analysis:

Episode 1: the cracks are showing but it hasn't crumbled yet

The animation feels less alive than in season 1 even if strong storyboarding still carries some scenes, as I know several of the season 1 storyboarders did work on this episode. It has a couple good sequences, a couple incredibly stilted ones. The overreliance on slowmo feels weird, and the animation struggles to properly convey things, like how we're supposed to take Hashtag's injury very seriously, but it just looked like she got bumped lightly.

the Decepticons are butchered and watered down into "evil because they're Decepticons". Chaos Terrans is an interesting concept and the way they're executing Aftermath would provide a foundation for exploring topics such as delinquent youth, but knowing how the series will go on to treat them in later episodes, I'm not hopeful.

the Maltos feel like they're sleepwalking. They have a lot of screentime but for some reason they don't feel present at all, it's like I'm watching their shadows move around on screen without the things that made them feel alive shining through.

If I didn't know beforehand what this season would eventually stagnate into, I could see myself being fooled into thinking the gripes I have with this episode are just growing pains, however i'm not so hopeful.

Episode 2: Improved in some ways but not in others. The episode premise is decent, and the narrower focus compared to episode 1 does help make the focus characters feel a bit more like themselves again. Unfortunately i just don't think the premise was utilized well at all. Introducing quintessons to the conflict is kind of a big development, but it doesn't flesh them out well IMO. They treat them like wild animals with no characterization for a majority of it, and then hint at some deeper conflicts at the very 3nd before promptly disposingof them. So ultimately it feels unsatisfying (although we do get some expositon in episode 9, but it doesn't add up to much).

And once again i must comment on the character acting on the humans especially being severely lacking.

Robbie and Mo having helmets for like half their screentime definitely feels like a cut corner not to animate their faces

Episode 3 review: some well animated sequences this time around, i'd seen the storyboards for them on twitter and they're really well done, but then there's some others that really werent as decent, so big ups and down in animation quality. Most of the episode did feel like a slight return to formula for Earthspark tho, with how it felt like it was actually making a point about something for once, which so far has been rare in season 2, although the conclusion wasn't the most satisfying with the whole "you can't have everything" message but then hashtag kinda gets most of what she wanted anyway.

Episode 4 is like.... baffling.

Like the fact that they swapped to a wholly different and much cheaper animation studio was so far just somewhat shining through, but now it's impossible to unsee. The animation here feels BEYOND stilted, in every way. Like not even the 2D FX animation looked convincing this time. That clip of Robbie dropping a cake is the weirdest animated thing i've ever seen. It's like it gets sucked out of his hands by a magnet.

The Faire Maestro is a type of character I feel like would have been handled really well in Transformers Animated but was just kinda nothing here, super ugly design too and very odd voice direction. Lots of just bizarre and mindboggling things in this episode, like them seeing faire maestro having an emberstone shard, and then deciding to steal it right in front of his face for absolutely no reason even though they think he's a normal guy and not a villain. And tiny inconsistencies like Mo knowing his name even though he never said it. Bizarre episode all around, Weird Al cameo is cute but then he's gone.

Episode 5 review: Finally Jawbreaker gets to be in it. Except now he feels like a baby. Just a big stomping juvenile baby.

And speaking of big stomping babies, Aftermath is one too. He feels like he's supposed to be a representation of troubled/delinquent youth who don't get along with their peers and who don't have positive role models or a support network, but he really comes off as being just... chaotic, no real sense of interiority to him other than "I'm mean and I enjoy being mean and I can't help it". He's entertaining on a surface level vibes basis, but it doesn't feel like any attempts are being made at making a point. He's barely been in the show so pretty much anything that could make his character interesting is completely missing. Like there's no development of how the decepticons are raising him other than the basic assumption of "bad role models", and the decepticons barely get to be characters this season either. Aftermath feels like an Afterthought, as Chaos Terrans have basically been less than a footnote, and the series has attempted to do no form of storytelling with them beyond surface level observations that honestly feel insulting to the other characters like how the decepticons are just evil now, and the autobots/terrans have lost all nuanced expressions of empathy and solidarity in favor of just "they're generally friendly"

oh and also the evil mushrooms are boring.

Episode 6 review: Man this episode just *feels* wrong, like viscerally.

The show's handling of the chaos terrans just keeps getting worse. There's absolutely NOTHING about spitfire that compels any form of empathy. Like there's not even a mote of her being a troubled and misguided youth, she's just straight up ontologically cruel, like nothing about the conflict in this episode regards a failure to understand, communicate, or empathise with each other, it's just a straight up rejection of those things on both sides. For this chaos terran delinquent analogy thing to work you NEED there to be a sense of humanity or waywardness to them. You NEED to be able to conceive of them as being capable of more than just anger. This just feels meanspirited, especially the way the Maltos have no desire for Spitfire to be better. They just wholeheartedly accept that she's ontologically evil, and honestly, the way she's presented in this episode you'd think they were right, but they're not SUPPOSED to be right.

It sucks too cuz chaos terrans are a great idea

season 1's terrans were all representations of good natured minority kids, particularly third culture kids, who despite their best intentions and kindness end up having to fight for acceptance.

The chaos terrans are a natural progression of that, with depicting kids who end up on the fringe of society because they're inherently different from others and have a harder time being understood, and who don't have a support network to set them straight.

So it starts out in a place where they'd easily be able to build on it, but it's squandered imo. And for several reasons:

1. the Decepticons are 1 dimensional bad guys this season so they fail to capitalize on any potential storytelling they could have done with how their generational resentment might be passed down to the younger generation. They also fail to build any sort of relationship between the Chaos Terrans and the decepticons, so any obligation to stay or debt of gratitude that they might feel is just not there. You get no sense of why they'd want to be decepticons other than wanting to be enabled and encouraged for cruel behavior. They could have given breakdown an actual father son dynamic with aftermath but instead undercut it and play it for laughs.

2. Because the malto's solidarity have been completely watered down into just being "good guys", and never really get to articulate any sort of deeper point in their attempt to appeal to the chaos terrans, so you don't get a sense of how they might help them if they were allowed.

and 3. because the chaos terrans themselves don't really feel like they have much of an inner struggle, interiority, or conflict, it doesn't really feel like there's much of a foothold for

Anyone to latch onto to get through to them. Which makes them feel unredeemable.

so to reiterate and summarize these 3 points; 1. there's no sense of how the chaos terrans are being given negative reinforcement, 2. there's no sense of how the Maltos might help undo this, and 3. there's no sense of how the chaos terrans might want to be helped or not helped.

I understand that like part of the point is that they don't understand the chaos terrans, which supposedly makes them feel more alienated and further pushed towards anger, but there's no nuance or attempt at solidarity to the way these misunderstandings occur. Like there's no hint of Twitch and the Maltos trying their best to reach out to spitfire in meaningful ways. There's no sense of there being some fundamental difference in perspective or circumstance that make them able to understand eachother's point of view, it's just straight up "i tried to be nice but you were mean so now i won't be nice anymore" and it never goes beyond that. It's insulting how easily the Maltos give up on them.

Episode 7: serving as a direct followup to the last, it continues a lot of the same flaws. It squanders any chance of giving Spitfire some depth, like they could have spun her obsessive competitiveness into a deep-seated need for approval or validation or something, but no, she's as one dimensional as her behavior would suggest. Her behavior just becomes more and more destructive to a cartoonish degree where it no longer becomes possible to feel empathy for her.

the whole freaky friday misunderstanding thing too also feels super forced, which isn't helped by the animation failing to convey a lot of ideas.

Comparing this season to season 1 so far, man it just really sucks at juggling the characters. We've had practically 0 focus or development for any of the autobots and decepticons, and the maltos for that matter, despite their overwhelming screentime.

This is likely a casting budget thing. Which is why bumblebee has been demoted from main cast member to a guy who maybe says 2 lines every 3 episodes.

The quality of season 1's writing would go up and down quite drastically between episodes, but so far season 2 has consistently been on par with some of season 1's worse entries. It's juvenile and it has next to nothing to say about anything. Barely even any basic surface level messages, just mostly meaningless antics with next to no focus on exploring characters.

Episode 8 review: it's fine. No notes. It's a competent comedy episode. Fun premise with the whole "thing getting continuously stolen by different people" trope. Basing an episode around optimus's trailer is funny. Animation isn't stellar. Overall it's just an ok episode. I have nothing to say about it other than it's well executed even if it's not very ambitious.

Episode 9/10: okay! End of the season. The finale's mixed for me. In a different universe, this would have been an OK finale for the most part, but the fact that the season has tarnished every single character and plotline from season 1 and made no successful attempt at building anything new of value makes it lack any impact it could have had.

Interesting angle to flip the quintesson creator race narrative that transformers fans are used to. Although they too were an afterthought for this season. Aftermath and Spitfire getting killed really was the rotten cherry on top of their miserable cake. First they're treated like dirt by the story and handled as poorly as they could possibly be, squandering the excellent potential they had, but then they just kill them. Just so starscream's heelturn is even more evil. It honestly feels sad to me that they even bothered to acknowledge the fact that starscream was redeemble in season 1. Just makes it feel even more annoying that they conciously gave up trying to make him nuanced. Some of the animation was good. The shots of terratronus rising were very well composited and communicated the scale extremely well. As for the actual climax, it felt pretty lacking.

Overall a dissapointing season. A shadow of what earthspark was. Most of the characters are completely sidelined (likely for lack of a casting budget), and the few who aren't don't get a single story that feels reminiscent of that immensely strong sense of confident identity that season 1 had.

Hasbro cannot help themselves can they

[originalaccountname]

Question (if you don’t mind answering, of course): How do you write like analyses and such?

I’ve been debating writing a sort of super mega analysis thingy about a specific piece of media I read/watch (I have a lot to say about it lol)…but I’m not entirely sure how to write it without it feeling/being like a school essay?

(Nothing wrong with those types of writings— I actually enjoy reading them— but I dislike the feeling of writing them due to my experiences with them two particular experiences involves a rant but that’s neither here nor there lol)

First of all, nobody is here to grade this work of passion and nobody will care that you didn't stick to a specific essay format, so shed away your worries. This is a place of exploration and freedom.

I think what I *actually* do when I do my meta/analysis posts is closer to a reading/text comprehension essay, where I break down parts of canon to see what makes them tick. A character study, breaking down the themes, my interpretation of the text, asking what the author intent was... but most of the time, it ends up being a mix of all of that.

My general objective when I write one of those posts is to clearly and succintly share my thoughts. I want it to be easy to digest and I want to show what brought me to that conclusion.

The first step is making sure my thoughts are organized. When I first start writing something, it's always jumbled. I have a lot of thoughts to put into words and I don't always know where to start, so I'll just write what I want to say and go from there. It's easier for me to rework thoughts I can see. I'll warn you, restructuring also comes with a lot of rewriting!

On a related note, I edit myself a lot to make sure I'm staying on topic and am not using more words than necessary (or making paragraphs that last forever). I tend to go on tangents and they make the reading experience a lot less smooth. If I find something isn't contributing to my point, I cut it. While writing essays for school, I tended to go way overcount, and the tip that helped me the most was to think of my sentences as grips on a climbing wall. Am I stalling on the same grip, grasping for air, or am I making meaningful progress?

My favourite touch is to try to select relevant citations and illustrations. They show where your logic comes from in the text, both giving your words credit and giving yourself the opportunity to correct your aim. They also break up the wall of text that are your thoughts in less intimidating chunks, for what I believe is a better rythm. Yes, even when they are actually just more text.

And you'll get better as you write! You'll pick up on what gets misinterpreted, find better ways to explain yourself, remember to start at the beginning, figure out how to format things in an appealing way, etc.

My earlier analysises haunt me because I went too fast and assumed my readers knew all about the things I was talking about, but also because I have since connected more dots that they obviously don't include. Maybe it's been long enough that I could remake them...

[redstringraven]

an excruciatingly long ramble about the '03 turtles and the enneagram 🐢 pt1

i’ve been working on this ‘project’ on/off for a year, and i need to get it out of my system. this is me posting the first part to force myself to stop fidgeting and hit the ground running.

i love the enneagram. i think it’s a useful tool not only for self-growth but also for character-writing and understanding. since 'typing' the boys, i've referred back to this tool while writing them or rewatching the series, and it's infuriating how much sense certain things start to make. to me, anyway!

as a heads up? this is going to be a big analysis over a series of posts. i have a lot to say fldjsfkl (i'm so sorry). i will try to keep it organized and understandable.

consider this the introductory post! posts will be linked below as i finish them. [ raph ], [ leo ], [ don ], [ mikey ]

some small disclaimers before we get started:

this is concerning the 2k3 incarnations of the boys only, and seasons 1-4 are given the most weight. 

i don’t take “”birth order”” into consideration. no one--not even them--knows the order they were born/hatched in. i won’t be referring to leo as ‘the oldest child’ nor mikey as ‘the youngest’, etc. when it comes to ‘filling a role’, sure, they do that just fine, but i tend to avoid referring to them in an actual birth order or approaching them from a birth order mindset. they step into roles rather than there being an established order. the 03 boys will frequently ‘switch roles’ depending on their circumstances and company.

these are also, obviously, my own thoughts/observations, and i’m not any sort of professional. I’ve just done reading and research and thinking. whether you agree or not is up to you, i’m not your mom, go--do whatever you want, it’s fine it’s good, i don’t care, blah blah blah, etc.

OKAY. an introduction and briefing:

we’ll start with some ground-work since the enneagram seems to be unfamiliar territory to a lot of folks i’ve spoken to. feel free to skip over the next two paragraphs if you’re already in the know. i’m not going to spend too long on it, but i feel like i need to spend some time or everything else that follows might get muddy.

while there were a few books i read in preparation for this, it was careless and neglectful of me not to mention the two i referenced and heavily pulled from in the more enneagram-focused sections of this project (the parts where the enneagram itself is explained rather than how it applies to the turtles) to aid in creating a baseline. i went into this excited to analyze and discuss the turtles specifically, but i should have treated both the sources and my own posting with more respect. i apologize for that massive oversight. i feel pretty damn stupid since i usually consider myself good at that sort of thing, but i'll continue trying to do better! the two books i referred from were:

the wisdom of the enneagram by don richard riso & russ hudson

the road back to you by ian morgan cron & suzanne stabile

and i recommend them if you have any interest in exploring the enneagram further!

the enneagram is a tool used to develop self-knowledge, self-understanding, and to grow beyond self-defeating aspects of our personalities, as well as improve the relationships with those around us and to grow in compassion.

one of my books uses colors to illustrate how the nine enneagram types work: there are an infinite number of variations of the color ‘red’, but they are all still variations of the same hue. similarly, there are an infinite number of ways a person may express their enneagram type. another thing to keep in mind: your number is not determined by how you behave, moreso why you behave. It’s less reliant on traits and focuses more on the motivation that drives you.

i also feel it’d be a breach in etiquette if i didn't say the enneagram should be used to type yourself, not others. these are fictional characters; please don’t go trying to type the people around you. don’t use it to justify your own questionable behavior, and please don't feel the need to adopt a more rigid personality if you see yourself in a type. again: this is a tool, not a rule book.

if you want my opinions immediately, and without further exploration or analysis, here they are:

Raph is an 8 and has a 7 wing Leo is a 1 and has a 2 wing Don is a 5 and has a 4 wing Mikey is a 7 and has a 6 wing

but if you want more details (including what the heck a ‘wing’ is), come along with me while i do some giant ass posts on the boys and how they align with their core numbers.

i'm especially excited to talk about "City at War" from the perspectives of an 8 and a 1, how mikey is a complicated combination of a lotta moving parts and almost stupidly self-aware, as well as "Same as it Never Was" and don's 5 and the fact this boy never talks about his goddamn horrors. like i warned: these are gonna be quite lengthy, but i’ll be breaking it up as neatly and in the most digestible way possible. as well as keep the meme-ing to a minimum. …but i make no promises.

stay tuned. i have an order i'm going in, and raph's up first.

[0809sysblings]

I was listening to Double's instrumental and there's like, the sound of a baby or small child?? What is going on??

very good question, i would also like to know the answer!

yeah tbh i don't have a very confident idea on what it means... i guess i've got a few possible ideas as to what it could signify but... again, i'm not confident in them so do with these what you will 👍!

also this is kinda long and rambly lol oopsie daisy...

it could represent John having been just born (as he directly refers to himself in the song as "a newborn" and also talks about how he was "born" only very recently in Neoplasm). now if this was meant to mean this, I would think they would have used the crying of a newborn baby to represent it since they cry when they're born, not laugh. which the audio seems to contain laughing, not crying. and newborns cannot laugh yet, only cry. so maybe instead of having just been born it's meant to allude to the fact that he's very very young.

TANGENT INCOMING...

--skip if you want it's not super relevant. maybe interesting to think about, but not completely relevant to this.--

cause i'm not really sure when exactly John split! was it before the murder(s)? during? after? idk lol.

i REALLY need to actually sit my ass down and read those long ass tarot card analysis posts for MeMe because i haven't really read any yet because i suffer from Cannot Fucking Sit Down And Focus To Read Giant Paragraphs Of Words disorder... which is ironic because i love rambling and making long posts. as you can see.

but anyway. maybe he split to deal with the stress leading up to it. or maybe he split to deal with the stress of the murder(s) having already happened and to take the responsibility even if he didn't actually kill anyone. it's not uncommon at all for an alter to split afterwards to take on the aspects of a trauma that can't be accepted.

for example- if Mikoto is the murderer, maybe John split to be someone who did want to murder the victim(s) and to be someone who doesn't feel any guilt over having done it. and then the other characteristics to his personality are to support this: unapologetic, doesn't take any shit, fine with being violent to protect himself and others, doesn't feel bad about rebelling, etc. hell, he could even legit believe he was the murderer depending on how far his role to take responsibility for it goes.

if John is the one shown mostly in Double (because there's certain imagery to suggest that maybe he isn't there for a lot of it. but also imagery to suggest he is. i hate it here my brain is too small for this), he may have not actually done the murder(s). if the inside of the train represents the subjective reality (not the objective reality) of what happened, so how John sees it, then that could be why he's doing the "killing" on the train even though we know the confirmed murder happened outside the train station. he's there to be the murderer, even if he may have not actually done it. and why we see mannequin pieces flying outside the train, where the murder occurred, as he swings from inside the train.

TANGENT END... yippee

ok i had another explanation but i cant seem to figure out how to word it... and also it's more to me like a "oh, an interesting nod to this thing maybe..." and less an actual theory.

if someone wants to add onto this with their own takes, please feel free <3. because i haven't thought too long or hard about this yet or any legit theories for the MV. despite being mikoto-pilled, i am more the type of person who likes to pick apart the psychology and subjective aspects of characters and behavior. not really... actual narrative theories.

thank you for the ask!! sorry i couldn't really answer anything for you though, hah...

[brzatto]

Hello! I'm the person who wrote the dissertation-length comment on chapter 2 of BCM. My essay of a comment probably speaks for itself but I really love your writing. I'm still thinking about your fic over a week later and reread your reply to my comment over and over. It took me a full evening to read chapter 2 because I would read a part, sit and think about it, then move to the next part. Even though the chapter was so long I was scared with each paragraph that it was going to end, I didn't want to stop reading. The ending was really satisfying, if the fic ended there it would be a lovely ending, but like I said in my original comment I'm so happy there's more to come. The ominous reply from you saying you might scrap what you've written and rewrite the ending nudged me to message you. I really hope you don't scrap what you've written so far! Even if it's not the direction you want the fic to go now, I think everyone would love to see the alternate ending if you're happy to share it in the event you don't use it for the fic. Kind of a "BCM 0.5" if you will. Everyone is begging for the porny carmrich writing so thought I'd throw my hat in the ring and beg for the alt. ending of BCM. xD

Also thank you for leaving such a long reply to my comment! I really liked hearing your thoughts about Carmy and Richie and would love to hear more about your writing process. Your fic was the first The Bear fic I ever read and it hasn't left my mind since I first read it back in December last year.

Sorry for another really long message I can't seem to stop typing once I start. xD

(p.s. you should post the carmrich pwp huhuhuhuhu)

of course i remember you! i always remember repeat commenters and i distinctly remember being at work when i got the email for the first comment you left me on bcm, it was a really lovely comment and it made my entire night.

i say this often to a lot of commenters but it really does mean so much to me that you enjoy my writing and it has that sort of effect on you!!! like more than you’ll ever know. i can count the number of times i’ve actually published works on ao3 on two hands and i’ve always gravitated towards rarepairs with nicher audiences in almost every fandom i’ve been in so the type of enthusiasm i’ve received so far with bcm is really genuinely touching. i always try my best to reciprocate the energy given to me in the comments i get but longer ones make me especially happy because i loooove discussing character analysis and dynamics with people and i’m always eager to know how other people interpret my characters and my writing! thanks for how much thought you put into all of your comments, i always look forward to reading what you have to say <3

as for the ending of bcm i don’t actually think i’ll fully be scrapping it, it’ll still end the same general way that i had in mind but i’ll probably end up rewriting/reworking it because a big chunk of the fic leading up to it is still unwritten and by the time i actually get close to the ending it probably won’t make much sense as it is currently word for word. i don’t normally write in chronological order, i write scenes out as they come to me (i usually envision climactic scenes very visually in my head and then write them out first lol) and then fill in the gaps/flesh out the storyline as i go. but since i got the idea for this fic and planned it out back before s2 came out and now s2 is out and canon’s been vastly expanded i’ll probably end up also borrowing some elements from s2 for my own storyline purposes just because if i’m being fully honest… i actually can’t tell you what ch3 of bcm and onwards is going to be like. i have vague notions of major plot points and the direction i want the story to take and fragments of later scenes in my docs but even as it stands now uncompleted bcm is the longest thing i’ve ever written (it’s 49k on ao3 and 60k in my docs) like… ever. i’m not used to finishing fics at all much less writing long fics (if bcm would count as one) so this is all very much new territory for me but everyone’s support and encouraging really helps keep me engaged and on track! including yours 🤍 in the event that the ending does drastically depart from what i’ve originally envisioned for it i probably will upload the alt ending separately. i’ve also sort of toyed with the idea of writing some scenes out from richie’s pov but if anything that’ll be something that comes much much later.

[misterroo2000]

Let's talk about food

It all started with bread. I was a normal kid up until that point, and photographic evidence exists that shows me eating it. I don't know the date of the event, or what triggered it, but I knew that I no longer liked the stuff.

Over the years, it went from "no longer like" to "really don't like" to "can't stand it" to "don't want to be near it" to "OMG it touched me". What is it about this seemingly simple substance that is so foul, that the mere thought of it can make me lose my otherwise substantial appetite? Good question, let's explore it.

We're never going to be able to go back to the 70's and witness the event, so let's stay in the present and figure out what's going on here. Let's suppose there is a regular old piece of white bread on a counter. Let me also interject for a moment and say that this medium is perfect for this analysis, because the number of times I have to stop typing and suppress the gag reflex is hidden from my readers. Back to the counter. The bread is sitting there. Maybe you just put it there, because I sure as hell didn't. You know what? It's already starting to leave it's mark on the counter - crumbs, condensation, quasi-liquid ingredients from the food itself? If you pick it up, you'll see its mark. You know what else is going on there? It's starting to mold. I don't know how old it is. "But I just bought it" nah, there's no chain of custody here. "There's a date on the bag" You trust that? You know how many times I see dates on things from the future? We've already established we can't time travel, so let's agree we don't know old this stuff is. Even if it came right from the factory, this stuff is programmed to mold. It's just a matter of time. What is going on at the molecular level? Maybe I was sleeping that day in science class, but do we know if this mold disease is contagious? Do we know for certain that by touching it, we will be immune to becoming mold ourselves? I know life is about risks, but why not just let it sit there and heat up some dino nuggs for lunch instead? What you see is what you get there.

"But who can deny the joy of smelling fresh bread?" ME, that's who. We all know that smells are just airborne particles of what you're smelling. That means bread is airborne. Touching it is out of the question, and you think I'm going to invite it into my nose and lungs? Might as well just eat it at that point. You are what you eat and I don’t want to be this garbage.

So now we know we can't touch it and can't smell it. Your nose and taste buds are linked, so right away we've dismissed three of the five senses. Let's call it cosmic fate that this nasty stuff doesn't emit sounds, because I might have to find another universe to live in if that were the case. It's bad enough that I agreed to look at it a couple of paragraphs above, but at least one of my five senses are spared the agony of moldy apocalypse.

Something as inherently evil as this doesn't leave itself alone, and I'm afraid it is a gateway food. Before we explore the offshoots, let's look at the rules of engagement for dealing with this yeast-beast that's here to stay. I'm putting these rules in first person form just because I choose to live bread-free doesn't mean I expect everyone to.

Obviously I can't touch it, that's easy.

Going back to the counter scenario, any surface that has directly contacted the material is now contaminated. Moving it elsewhere does not cure the original spot of contamination. It must be cleaned thoroughly by any chemical means necessary.

Any object or body part that touches it is also contaminated. Do not expect me to shake your hand if you've been holding a $5 Super Arby's Whopper Mac Deluxe. Use some 200% alcohol hand sanitizer first and gargle some mouthwash, please.

If the bread was spawned from a factory, then the bag it comes in is safe as long as it factory sealed. Machines do not make mistakes and ensure the contagions are kept within the plastic.

If the bread comes from a bakery and placed in a bag by a non-robot, then the bag is irradiated and not to be touched or handled.

The only correct way to handle such a bag, like if someone is foolish enough to give me a shopping list with this grossness on it, is to use a disposable item to serve as a germ barrier to lift, yeet or otherwise transfer to the shopping cart and transport bag.

Food items that touch bread are no longer food. "Just take the burger off the bun and eat it." Basically the same logic as "So what if there were 50 flies on your burrito, they didn't eat much and left you plenty." Nope with a capital ope.

Okay, we've beaten bread to death. Let's look at its relatives.

Buns, biscuits, rolls - no matter how you slice it, it's bread in disguise.

Butter - Bread and butter, they're practically brothers. Butter is okay as long as it is hidden as an ingredient, and ignorance is bliss.

Ketchup - This is a horrible thing to do to an innocent tomato, and it makes sense that it can go to the electric chair with bread.

Peanut butter, jelly - Also horrible things to do to perfectly good natural items and turn them into abominations. Enjoy the underworld along with the rest of this list.

Let's take a summary break to see where we're at. All these things are definitively gross:

Hamburgers

Hot dogs

Sliders

PB&J

Any kind of sandwich

Croutons - come on, who are you fooling here?

French toast (admittedly, it took me several years after the original awakening to realize this, and I'm not afraid to admit my mistakes)

French bread pizza - what a joke, knock this off immediately

I'm not a monster and I have exceptions, because of reasons.

Pizza - "But it's bread" - No it is not. If it were, it would be called Pepperoni Cheese Pizza Sauce Sandwich, but it's not is it?

Donuts - These are fried, and frankly adorable. I'll never hate you, donut.

Cinnamon rolls - I do not want to know how close these are to actual rolls, and over the decades I managed to keep this one filed under plausible deniability. I'm probably lucky no one has spilled the beans here, and don't let yourself become the one to take this from me.

Pancakes and waffles. I've made these before, and they are perfectly innocent. To put these in the same category is bread is an assault on logic.

There is something about the word bread. I know corn bread exists, but I also know you can tell the Cracker Barrel server to bring out corn muffins and that's what they bring. Bread does not come in muffin form.

Someone seriously proposed : "So if I brought you a sandwich and called it Bobby Pasta, would you eat it?" Look, Steve, I know this whole thing may seem weird to you, but look who just made up a new food called Bobby Pasta. I can suspend disbelief to a point, but let's stay in the realm of reason.

So those are the severe food issues. Let's cover the rest of things and I'll let you get back to your day or evening.

Fish - I remember eating fish as a kid and being told to "chew it thoroughly, there could be bones in there". AND THERE WERE. Bendable little needle bones that would probably shred my digestive system into hamburger meat. Which, I must say, is preferable to eating any of the things in the bulleted list above. I've tried fish, but mostly just don't like it. I can touch it and it does not have all of the nasty mold spore qualities, so once elected Supreme Chancellor, I will allow this to continue to exist as food. This includes lobster, shrimp and sushi. I really don't know who decided to eat things from the fish tank, but hey I have stuffed animals I keep by the bed so let's not judge.

Foods with hidden ingredients. I don't mean things like butter. I mean like jelly donuts. WTF? "Hey let's make a treat but let's hide something in it that squirts out when you bite in it, wouldn't that be great?" I don't know about you, but I like my food NOT to bleed red goo when I have at it. If you want jelly on your donut, be honest and put it on the outside. Don't be hiding it and think you deserve to win a cooking contest. "Don't you eat Ding-Dongs?" Sorry Pam, there's a picture of what's happening right on the box. If you don't read it, there's not much I can do to help. Jelly donuts can't say that. For the record, this includes Cassata cake

Fig newtons - I don't know what pervert classified these as cookies, but these should be banned by the Geneva Convention. "Who wants Fig Newtons??" NO ONE CHERYL, THROW THEM AWAY OUT BACK WHERE WE CAN'T SMELL THEM.

Cheese - this is weird. It is perfectly okay on pizza in moderation, but it's hard to handle in most other settings. Like lasagna. Anyone ever say, "Oh you can hardly even taste it." Oh yeah??? Well then why is it in there? Can't even be honest about the cheese, how will I believe anything you say ever again?

Eggs - I don't even know what these are. I realize they are a critical ingredient for important things, but I don't see anyone eating flour out of a bag so why people eat eggs is a mystery to me. I will not be offended by your egg-eating as long as you don't brag about how runny that yellow liquid is and how good it tastes.

Ham - I eat this, but it's clearly the weakest of the meats. What makes ham not a pork chop? That is a rhetorical question because I do not want to risk losing pork chops to this list.

Let's end on a high note. I've obviously well-fed, so how did this come to be?

Maraschino cherries - the most perfect substance on Earth. So is the juice. Top of the list every time.

Pasta - What an awesome thing this is. Just bland little sticks that become the ultimate edible toy. You slurp them, throw them, put a lot of sauce, a little sauce, it doesn't matter. It comes in all shapes and sizes, because why not. There must be a whole science to knowing the names for all the shapes.

Rice - It's like they took the little sticks and chopped them up into 1cm line segments. Great as a side, and fantastic as a breakfast item with milk and sugar.

Normal meat - steak, pork, chicken, venison. Can't go wrong with any of these. Just don't try to pickle it or do anything weird like pot it.

Mexican food. Leave off the cheese and I can eat just about anything on a Mexican restaurant menu. Tortillas are amazing, too. They're edible napkins, and who doesn't want that? You can fill them with anything.

Chinese food. I love how there's nothing with cheese on a Chinese food menu. Except for the fish, I can eat just about anything here. I would come back from a trip to China much larger for sure.

I think that's about it. Good talk, I hope you got to know me a little better and if you ever invite me over for a meal, think of all the awkward conversations we can now avoid!

[sixofravens-reads]

I have finished Hangsaman! I....struggled with it lol

Part of it is that I think Jackson's writing style was not as refined at this point (this is her second novel I believe?) so I didn't get the same thing I was expecting after reading The Haunting of Hill House and We Have Always Lived in the Castle. Another part is that I find Natalie's parents insufferable and want to stab her dad with his own pen, which meant the beginning portion of the book dragged so much.

And the last part of the book...I just couldn't make sense of lol. Between their constant made-up story conversation and the very long paragraphs (admittedly I was maybe getting hangry and headachey and couldn't focus well at this point) I just...did not know what the author had in mind. I think this is part of the unrefined writing - it just went on for too long...I was like 'okay, I get it, these girls are cutting class and making up stories while running around town and Natalie has been lying about her classwork for weeks' but there was just like....fifty goddamn pages of it.

I was wondering if Tony was maybe a hallucination or something since Natalie is clearly struggling with her mental health, but then other people interacted with her...was she just one of those people who takes a bit way too far (also a common character type in Jackson's novels - someone who pushes social bounds so far that the MC is intensely uncomfortable yet unable to get away. she is very good at writing social anxiety based horror!)

I did like the book, and I will for sure reread it at some point, but I am definitely going to have to look up some analysis and see if someone with more brain cells can tell me what was going on here.

[randomjreader]

Book review: A Cuban Girl's Guide to Tea and Tomorrow

Note: I have never really done a book review before, so I apologise in advance if this is more random ramblings than insightful comments or deep character and plot analysis or smtg. Also, spoilers ahead, you have been warned.

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So, I guess I gotta start by saying that this was a really enjoyable read. It's not a literary masterpiece or anything, and was kind of predictable, but it was wholesome and heartwarming and nice. It was a feel good fluffy story, with just the right amount of angst mixed into it that it didn't make me feel extra sad, but enough to drive the story and make it interesting.

For some context, I am a simple person; it doesn't take much to please me in a story as long as it stays away from a very small handful of tropes and themes that I despise. HOWEVER, I have a very short attention span. A book really has to captivate me to stop me from skipping paragraphs or chapters, or simply just skipping to the end to find out what happens and be done with it. ACGGTTAT did that.

The thing about this book is that a lot of emphasis is put on the experiences Lila faces, both in Miami and in Winchester. The ending was predictable enough: Lila and Orion getting together and making things work despite living in two different continents. So my impatient ass wasn't desperate to know what happened in the end, and instead could just enjoy the journey that Lila went on over the summer. It was well written, made me feel like I was there, and when Lila said she fell in love with England, I could imagine why.

My favourite thing about the book, though, is definitely learning about the Cuban culture. I'm not Latinx, or am from a place that gives exposure to Latinx culture at all really, so I loved reading about it and learning about some of the history and traditions and of course, the food. It was mind opening, and you can tell that this was personal, that the author really put a piece of herself into it. If I ever wrote a book, I would want to be able to do that. Tell a story that shares a part of my heritage and my identity with the world. I've also been meaning to learn Spanish, though I haven't really found the time, so now I have a few more words to add to my word bank and hope that I'll remember them.

Let's take a moment to talk about our main characters tho. I may not have faced a trifecta loss like Lila, but I do see myself in parts of her, the way she's stubborn and ambitious, has trouble handling change, and can sometimes be not aware of how her fire may affect people, like with Andrés and Stefanie. Her character arc was nice; she doesn't lose her drive or her ambition, it just changed along with her, and she becomes more aware of herself and works to better herself.

Her dynamic with Orion was also something I quite liked. Orion himself is such a great character. I've never been big on the mysterious, bad boy type of MCs, I much prefer kind, sensitive, a little goofy, a bit of golden retriever energy kind of boys. Orion is definitely the latter, but he also has darker depths. Him and Lila complement each other well. He slows her one track mind down, and she gives him hope and someone to fight for when he has grown to just accept what is given to him. I love how they are from two different worlds, but share their lives with each other and teach each other about their cultures.

But most of all, I really liked that Lila and Orion didn't have to kiss, or do anything extremely passionate, for us to see how they love each other. You can see the way their relationship progresses slowly, how they grow close day by day, and gain feelings for one another. They both long acknowledge their feelings for each other before they have their first kiss, which is something I don't see too often. And it was pretty realistic for them to want to hold back knowing that their time would come to and end soon, but it also didn't make their romance any less real, just because they were "friends". If you get what I mean.

Since we're on the topic of characters, I really wanna talk about how they're being portrayed in the upcoming movie by Maia Reficco and Kit Connor. I don't know much about Maia, just because she doesn't have many acting projects under her belt yet. Pretty little liars original sin was her big breakout role, but I personally can't handle horror/thriller yet, so I won't be watching pllos for a while. However, I have watched some of her interviews, and whatever clips I could scrounge up that wouldn't give me nightmares, and I think that she would make a great Lila. I can see how she can portray Lila's sassy and bold personality. Obviously, I'm a huge heartstopper fan, so I know more about Kit, and I 100% think he'll be a great Orion. He did such a good job with nick nelson, and I can see some similarities between the two characters, so I don't think he'll have any problem with portraying Orion accurately.

Ok, I've pretty much said all I wanted to say. It was a good read, definitely recommend, and I can't wait for the movie next year. Thanks for reading, and hey if you have any differing opinions or wtv chat with me in the comments I wanna see what other people think <3

[magnus-the-maqnificent]

Let's Analyze - Alec in CoFA

So, I’ve been seeing plenty of discourse on two of my mutual’s blogs about this topic… so I thought I’d sit down and write another analysis post about my beloved Alec Lightwood cause people are still giving him shit for a book that came out ten years ago 🤦‍♀️

This is gonna be in two parts, and I'm putting both under the cut:

PART 1 - ALEC’S INSECURITIES 

So, the first part - how Alec’s insecurities drove him to saying stupid things in CoFA

A quick disclaimer - I’m NOT blaming Alec alone for his and Magnus’s break up. What happened was pretty complicated, and the blame cannot be put on one person alone. 

That said, let’s start with Magnus and Alec’s early ‘official’ relationship, in trsom.

These scenes are taken from only the first part of the book, but I’m pretty sure they’re more than enough to get a sense of Alec’s insecurities and all the chinks in their relationship. Throughout the entirety of trsom, we see more bits and pieces of Alec’s insecurities about Magnus’s sexuality, and his past and all the people he might have known - and that’s okay! Insecurities happen, cause brains are stupid like that.

But all of Alec’s insecurities could’ve been laid to rest with a simple conversation. But the conversation never happens. Magnus tends to deflect and change the topic every single time his past is brought up. I understand Magnus’s reasons for hiding his past, of course, but it doesn’t help his relationship with Alec. Magnus hiding a good chunk of his past will inevitably lead to Alec questioning himself - why is he so secretive? Why is he not telling me anything? Does he not trust me? ...and so on.

And when Alec is already feeling insecure in this relationship, this happens - (sorry about the terrible cropping btw)

And then later, while Magnus is talking to Camille,

Now… when people are insecure about something, they get irked at the smallest of things. I’m saying this as an insecure person myself. So now, you've got Alec, who's insecure as fuck, and his vacation with the person he loves got cut short by his ex who refuses to talk to anyone but him, and when they get there, his lover and his lover's ex seem to have obvious chemistry, he gets hit with the reality that his lover has dated several, probably even hundreds of people before him; and he has to leave them alone in a room so they can talk, and then he hears the ex basically just list all his shortcomings - i.e, his mortality, his appearance is compared to some random dead guy (sorry, Will) whom your lover had a crush on, which is just weird, and when you've had enough and open the door, it's to see your lover and his ex, standing close as fuck, and he's! touching! her! face! and! looking! into! her! eyes!

*takes a sip of water* yeahhhh... Alec was straight up having a bad day.

And at this point, a) Alec is still in his first relationship. He didn't get to navigate romance when he was younger, and while there's nothing wrong with that, there weren't exactly cutesy presentations titled 'how to keep your relationships healthy' floating around the internet. Heck, he didn’t know the internet. He didn't know that he had to communicate with Magnus, and it doesn't help that boy avoids conversations about feelings like the plague. And b) at this point, Alec would be facing several negative emotions - insecurity, obviously. Hurt. Helplessness, because of his mortality. Fear, that he might not live up to Magnus’s past lovers. Jealousy at seeing Magnus and Camille so close.

Negative emotions like these often tend to show up as anger or sorrow... and in Alec’s case, that would be anger. Which leads us to THIS- (🙈)

*sighs in second-hand embarrassment*

*drinks more water*

*this is gonna be so hard aksjakak*

So. Alec dealt with his insecurities... by being a mean, mean bitch to Magnus :/

Let's break this scene down, slowly, bit by bit.

First, Alec cuts into a conversation between Magnus and Jordan, when Magnus mentions Woolsey Scott, followed the rest of that particular page. To Alec, he's just a figure from Magnus’s past, and a possible lover, though in Alec’s defense Woolsey Scott WAS Magnus’s lover. This is the first instance that we see in which Alec lashes out at Magnus. It seems like he's trying to make a point to Magnus - "I don't know anything about your past, and so I don't know who you've had romances with, but I want to know." Except he makes his point in the worst way possible and ends up slutshaming Magnus.

The "What's true?" line, in response to Jordan saying "so it's true what they say about warlocks, then?" is pretty obvious. Alec is clearly not liking the idea that this random werewolf might know about warlocks, and in particular, his Warlock boyfriend.

Next... ooh boy... Alec basically snaps and in the next few paragraphs accuses Magnus of wanting to flirt with others which... is not a good look on ya honey 😕. These lines are the ones that get him accused of being biphobic... but is he really? I'm gonna talk about that in part 2.

So, in the first paragraph, where Alec makes the comments about Jordan, I find his choice of words pretty... interesting, seeing as 'messy-haired', 'broad-shouldered' and 'chiseled-good-looks' are all used to describe Alec in the series. Not sure if its relevant, but definitely interesting.

And in the next one, where Alec says, "or there are plenty of pretty girls here, since apparently your taste goes both ways. Is there anything you aren't into?" The 'apparently' makes me curious. In rsom, Alec mentions that he's only recently heard of the term bisexual, and there's plenty of time between rsom and cofa, so Alec should be absolutely sure of atleast the basic meaning of bisexuality. But I'm pretty sure it's just inconsistency on cc's part, since if rsom didn't exist, this book would be the first time Alec learns about Magnus’s bisexuality. (Which is obvious when you look at the scene after Magnus reveals that Camille is his girlfriend.) And as for the second sentence, I feel like it's a fallback to earlier in the book when Magnus says (I'm just gonna write the dialogue from memory), "I've dated men, women, warlocks, faeries, vampires, werewolves and even a djinn or two." Here, Alec is angry, and he takes the knowledge that Magnus has dated a variety of people and once again, lashes out.

Looking at all of it together, Alec’s insecurities are definitely a factor in all of this. We know Alec has pretty low self esteem in tmi, and he keeps having irrational thoughts about someone else grabbing Magnus’s attention, like in the trsom scene I've posted above. And he ends up taking out his insecurities on Magnus.

Was it wrong of Alec to say all those things to Magnus? Yes, absolutely. But looking back through all his scenes in cofa, it's easy to see how he could've fallen into the pit trap of emotions.

And before anyone says "but it wasn't addressed in the later books", it was, in CoLS. I’ve hit the image limit, so I'm just gonna type it out -

"[Magnus] said it would be better if he didn’t come. Apparently him and the Seelie Queen have some kind of history."

Isabelle raised her eyebrows.

"Not that kind of history," Alec said irritably. "Some kind of feud. Though," he added, half under his breath, "the way he got around before me, I wouldn't be surprised."

"Alec!" Isabelle dropped back to talk to her brother....

So, there. Alec makes yet another slutshaming comment, Isabelle overhears and is clearly not happy about it, and it's clearly implied that she talks to Alec about it. And Alec doesn't make any more slutshaming comments since then. Boy now knows what he did was wrong, and makes sure not to repeat it again.

Although, I do wish we had more than this. I wish we had more of Magnus and Alec talking about this argument, heck, even about all their arguments and the reasons they broke up, but you can't get everything you want, apparently :(

And now onto the next part...

PART 2 - IS ALEC BIPHOBIC?

The short answer, uh, no, not really.

The long answer.... would be complicated.

So, back in the day, when this discourse was at an all time high, I remember reading a bisexual person's essay about this topic, and they said that this comment from Alec - "or there are plenty of pretty girls here, since apparently your taste goes both ways. Is there anything you aren't into?" - would be a biphobic microagression.

According to Google, a microagression is "a statement, action, or incident regarded as an instance of indirect, subtle, or unintentional discrimination against members of a marginalized group such as a racial or ethnic minority".

And in Alec's case, IF his words were biphobic, they were completely unintentional. They were microagressive. Which is... still bad, of course, but it's more complicated than that.

If you look back on Alec's supposedly biphobic statements, they're more about Magnus’s hypersexuality and promiscuity than anything else. Yes, even the line i mentioned like two paragraphs ago. At first glance it may seem like a direct attack on Magnus’s sexuality, but think over the explanation I gave for the line and it will make sense. And a lot of people know that the whole 'bi people fuck around a lot and are cheaters' thing is a stereotype.

Now, it may seem like I'm going off topic here, but bear with me. I couple of days ago, I watched this video by chance. (Tw for the aids crisis and lots of biphobia, not from the narrator, if you wanna watch the video). Basically, back in the 1980s, bisexual men were scapegoated for spreading aids to the straight community and were vilified by popular media as being promiscuous scepters who would cheat on their wives with gay men and then give aids to their wives. (Yikes 😬). And since bisexuality was practically unheard of before all this (several bisexual activists have stated that all this shit, though unfortunate, pulled bisexuality out of the closet), it's safe to assume that this is how those stereotypes came to be - through 1980s propaganda.

But living with this propaganda is... a very limiting experience. The people who leaned and unlearned and fought against this propaganda are mostly US Americans who grew up with it, either the actual propaganda itself or passed down by their parents. But like I said, it's a very limiting experience. US is but one country out of many, and even for those living in the USA there's a chance that they grew up in a very hush-hush environment. People who grew up hearing all these stereotypes will see it as biphobia, while people who didn't - like Alec, and me, and several other people will not. A lot of people grow up with absolutely no knowledge of the queer community, and chances are that they'll be incredibly confused when a stereotype is pointed out to them, and they often get no more explanation than 'this is a harmful stereotype'. Queer experiences aren't the same for everyone, and while I respect the people who see this as biphobia, they should recognize that there are many people who won't see it that way.

I have seen bisexual people say that Alec's words were biphobic, and I've also seen bisexual people say that they weren't. Thus, there is no clear consensus about whether or not Alec was being biphobic. And like I said earlier, Alec grew up far, far away from mundane anti-queer bigotry. He was essentially a clean slate when it came to knowledge of eer microagressions of any kind, because microagressions and stereotypes are often incredibly specific, don't have anything to do with a person's race/sexuality/gender, etc. and will make zero sense unless you know the history behind them. To Magnus, who lived through the anti-bisexual scapegoating, the words would've definitely stung, but Alec didn't even know the implications he would be making with this words! Of course, the impact is greater than intention, and I imagine Magnus would sit Alec down one day and talk about all this history with him.

And idk if I can even blame cc cause the history of bisexual men is RARELY ever talked about, atleast on the internet.

Also, this scene in cofa is the only instance where he can be interpreted to be biphobic. Nowhere else in all of tmi, and even tec, do we see Alec express hatred or disgust or microagression towards bisexual people. If this was seen in a repeating pattern from Alec, one could argue that he's biphobic... but he isn't. Some might point to some of his internal thoughts in trsom to argue otherwise, but I believe that actions are superior than thoughts.

There's also the thing about unlearning prejudices, but in Alec's case there was hardly anything to be unlearned. The only prejudices he did pick up on were against himself, through vague homophobic comments from Robert.

P.S if you've read this far, I am legally entitled to compensation for thinking of cofa Alec for 48 hours. Put your favorite Alec moments in my askbox cause I wanna focus on his good side now. 😎

But yeah, the main thing here is that Alec has grown from his mistakes, apologized, and hasn't repeated this behavior at all.

And lastly, I just wanted to add - I don't think all this was unintentional on the author's part. She's grown up with the us American queer community, and has mentioned that she has bisexual friends, who have no doubt faced prejudices because of these stereotypes. I think she was trying to condemn making such statements, but a lot of people don't read between the lines and end up misinterpreting it and make both the character and her to be biphobic.

So... TLDR; was what Alec said biphobic? Maybe. It depends on who you're talking to. Is Alec, as a person, biphobic? Nope. Not at all. 😌

[pompompurin1028]

I’m so sorry for spamming you with asks all day long😭😭 But omg I gotta ask you this before I forget!!

So I was reading No Longer Human and this paragraph really interested me:

Crime and Punishment. Dostoievski. These words grazed over a corner of my mind, startling me. Just supposing Dostoievski ranged 'crime' and 'punishment' side by side not as synonyms but as antonyms. Crime and punishment—absolutely incompatible ideas, irreconcilable as oil and water. I felt I was beginning to understand what lay at the bottom of the scum-covered, turbid pond, that chaos of Dostoievski's mind—no, I still didn't quite see... Such thoughts were flashing through my head like a revolving lantern when I heard a voice. (…)

This is really interesting, especially considering Fyodor’s scene in Dead Apple where he talked about Crime and Punishment.

What do you think he truly meant here? I understand that his sense of “crime” isn’t the same with the dictionary definition of crime, normally one would consider the punishment to be the consequence of the crime. Is he talking about the corruption of justice or the society? I wish we got more insight about his thoughts on this, but Yozo gets interrupted during his inner monologue which is saddening.

Ahh I'm so glad someone wanted to talk to me about this!! Because this part had been on my mind a lot since I've read the book, as this is one of the parts that I didn't really grasp and understand. But also really interested me, and I wished he wasn’t interrupted too. Ahh Dazai-sensei’s mind is so intriguing. Anyways

I do also feel that he is referring to a different type of crime, not the kind that we see in the justice system. No, I don't think Yozo nor Dazai has much care about that type of crime. After all, as we've seen in the anime, as Oda said good and bad doesn't mean much to him. This is also parallel of one quote in The Setting Sun, “I have never, not even once, acted on the basis of any doctrine or philosophy”.

But what if he isn’t referring to that kind of crime? I mean even Yozo himself said “actions punishable by jail sentence is not the only crime”. Crime can also be defined as “an action or activity considered to be evil, shameful, or wrong”. And what does this parallel to? Perhaps some other quotes from No Longer Human, “Mine has been a life of much shame” or “Living itself is the source of sin”. So is being human a source of crime in his pov? For we are constantly deceiving one another, as he said:

“I am convinced that human life is full with many pure, happy, serene examples of insincerity, truly splendid of their kind-of people deceiving one another without wounds being inflicted...”

But why does he see repentance, confession and prayer as synonyms to crime if that is the case? Perhaps it is because to do so, is to go against the normalcy of what Dazai seems to deem as humanity, and thus it is seen by others as a crime?

And yet, Dazai sees punishment as a complete opposite perhaps it is because this “crime” which he sees humanity commit is so frequent that it is ingrained in us? And is never punished for?

I honestly have no idea, but that could be one way to interpret it. But in a sense it is kind of ironic, because although Yozo seems to recognize this “crime of humanity” and is confessing his “crimes” in his works, he himself is deemed a criminal by the rest of humanity, as people like Horiki sees him as a criminal.

Honestly this whole part of the story is so interesting to me, and I’m so glad you wanted to talk about it haha. I wracked my brain for this😂

I also really like how this analysis interprets it, this is also the analysis which talked about Dead Apple and Carl Jung! And I urge you to read it, but only after season 3 as it has spoilers for it. There are also some manga spoilers in it as well unfortunately, but not too much I’d say?

[mellometal]

Hey, everyone.

I've tried to compose myself before making this post. This is a subject that I've touched on a little bit in posts, but I've never done a deep dive into JUST this topic. I was going to make a post solely about this subject sooner, but this one in particular is really hard for me to talk about without getting emotional...and yet Dhar Mann has talked about this on quite a few occasions in the most insincere, toxic ways. I'll do my best to discuss this topic without getting too emotional.

It's about a serious subject that people still are ignorant about and don't take seriously. Even to this day, with the body positivity and body neutrality movements. (I don't know of a better way to describe just being neutral about your body. Sorry if it sounds weird.)

For anyone who doesn't know what I'm referring to (honestly, I don't blame you, as this is a subject that's often seen as normal and is encouraged in society for the most part), I'm talking about fatphobia. Hating on people for being fat. Discriminating people because of their weight in the workplace, at the doctor's office, just in general. Not many stores having inclusive sizes. People being treated like they're subhuman because they're fat.

I want to say this first, before I bash on Dhar Mann again: I'm a plus-size young woman. This is something that I have personal experience with. Your weight has no significance to your worth as a person. If you do happen to be overweight, obese, whatever, you're not subhuman. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You're worthy of being loved, listened to, treated with kindness, and respected, just like anyone else who isn't fat.

If you treat people like utter shit for their weight, get some help. Why do you care about somebody else's weight? Obviously there's an exception to this, like if they're so big they can't move or they're so skinny their organs are showing....because those are causes for concern, but other than that, mind your own business. Even if they are in those extremities, unless you're their doctor and/or their family, STILL mind your own business. How the fuck does a fat person simply breathing and existing affect you in any way? News flash: there will always be fat people.

Before I get to the weekly ritual of tearing TWO of Dhar Mann's videos apart (the next one will be in another post or I'll reblog this post and continue on there), here's an obligatory trigger warning for the video analysis itself and my response: The following post contains fatphobia, fat shaming, a man being super fucking misogynistic and treating women like they're objects, and there's even a touch of some racial aggression. How shocking. Because Dhar Mann really seems to get a kick out of writing about racism to make it all cute. Oh yeah, you're totally solving racism, Dhar Mann. /s

My response contains my experience with fatphobia, relationships with food, mentioned/implied thoughts of s3lf h@rm, feeling like I'm unworthy of being treated like an actual person because of my weight, and absolute rage. Like usual. My responses are very heated. This one especially. It's LONG. Buckle up.

With all this out of the way, let's get to the first video that I want to tear apart. This one is about the auditions for a record deal. I will get to the video about a kid wanting to be a host of a radio show later.

To sum up the first video, a plus-size white woman (Krissy Elliot) is singing for an agent (Isaac) and his assistant (Evette) so she can follow her dream to become a singer. Isaac cuts Krissy off to viciously bash her for being a plus-size woman. Evette stands up for this woman, and says she sounded fine and to let her finish. Isaac doesn't listen to Evette, let alone take what she said into consideration. He continues to ridicule Krissy for her appearance, that she'll "never make it in the music industry" (WRONG, do you know how many plus-size people are in the fucking music industry? There are A LOT more now than when I was growing up and it honestly makes me so happy. There were more plus-size people in the entertainment industry than in the music industry back then.), suggested that she "become a chef or a food critic" because she apparently loves being around food (being a chef or a food critic are noble professions, but NEVER fucking assume ANYONE'S relationships with food), to the point where Krissy left the room in tears.

Here are a few screenshots for context:

When this skinny, conventionally attractive woman (Jesse) comes in, Isaac's mood does a COMPLETE 180° and he's all sunshine and rainbows. Then right as soon as Jesse did her audition, Isaac is over the fucking moon, complimenting her physical appearance, treating her like an object, and signs her up for a record deal RIGHT AWAY. Pay attention to Isaac's facial expressions in one of these screenshots.

Evette suggests that they sign Krissy for a record deal instead. Because she was "the best singer they've had all day". Isaac, still all hot and bothered by a skinny, conventionally attractive woman that he's treating like an object, tells Evette that people like Krissy don't make it in the music industry because they're "overweight and unattractive", and is verbally aggressive towards her when she does nothing but explain her stance. Isaac sees this as Evette "talking back" (remember how I mentioned that there's racial aggression? He says that Evette is "talking back" because she happens to be a black woman) and fires her. He signs Jesse a record deal and has a blast with her.

The award ceremony comes around, and they're picking a winner for Best New Artist. They pick the winner, and it's....guess what? You'll never get it! It's Krissy Elliot! Why? Because Evette became her agent after Isaac fired her. Krissy goes into her whole story about how she was laughed out of every single agency and that she worked hard. Good for her. Jesse is obviously very happy for Krissy. We gotta love women supporting women.

This video was again another dumpster fire. As usual. Like I said, with this video in particular, I couldn't get through the first thirty seconds the first time around. Because I've dealt with shit like this. Obviously not with the music industry because I don't even think I'd be good enough to step into an agency...but I mean in my personal life.

Being told by my own dad that he was "tired of buying bigger clothes for me" when I was a young teenager, despite him buying almost nothing but "junk food".

Having my abuser make comments about my weight and talking about diets while I'm trying to eat my food, despite her being overweight.

Having someone I know (not anyone I'm friends with) make a comment about me eating a few things (ONE small piece of broccoli, two baby carrots, a small handful of chips, and ONE small piece of pineapple) and said to "save some for everyone else", even though I was saving food for everyone else, which is why I took so little. She tried to justify it with the fact nobody was there yet (why do you think I took very little food?), and she "was saying that to everyone" (why did she look at ME when she said that instead of making it clear that she was talking to everyone [saying "Hey, everyone" before the comment about saving some for everyone else IS NOT HARD]?), even though I know it was just to save her own ass. I knew she said that to me because I'm plus-size. She didn't say anything to anyone else, nor did she make it clear that she was talking to everyone.

Another person I know (not a person I'm friends with) saying that I overreacted (I did not overreact; SOMEONE TRIGGERED ME and you did NOTHING about it) even though they all KNEW my relationship with food is complicated. They KNEW that I don't really like eating in front of other people. I was upset that someone MADE A FUCKING DISGUSTING, TRIGGERING COMMENT ABOUT ME EATING VERY FEW FOOD ITEMS, ALMOST ALL WERE HEALTHY, DESPITE OTHER PEOPLE EATING A LOT MORE THAN I DID AND PICKING AT EVERYTHING. That day, I was begging one of my friends (one of the people I trust to eat around) to PLEASE take me home because I didn't want to be there (never wanted to be there in the first place), I was tired (I worked all night the night before and was forced to go to a meeting before all this happened), I didn't feel comfortable there anymore, there were way too many people (four individuals plus all their staff from another house were in the house I work in), I couldn't breathe (I was either about to pass out, have a panic attack, or just start crying), but nobody listened to me. I ended up getting a bus to go home.

(Sorry about all that. I was trying not to get emotional in this post. I just needed to share how this can affect people.)

Onto my response, which is all in the screenshots below.

ETA: I know the screenshots for my response are very jumbled right now and it’s difficult to read. I apologize to anyone who’s unable to fully read it! Because this is part one of this whole subject of fatphobia (I’m making a post about the boy wanting to become a radio host very soon), my response here will tie into that post. My response to that video is vastly the same, despite not making a comment on that video as of right now (the radio host one). 

I’ll be typing out my full response here. I apologize for weird formatting. Instagram wouldn’t let me break up my response into paragraphs. I’ll break them up into paragraphs here instead.

CC (Combination of the first, second, and third screenshots, aka, the first part of my response):

 I have a few questions before I get into my thoughts on this video. One, how the hell does your weight have any significance on your worth as a person, and if you do think this way, why would you think that? Two, do you know that fatphobia is a lot more than just judging a person for being fat? Three, why do you feel like you can speak for fat people like myself with this piss poor excuse for a video that I could barely get through the first thirty seconds of the first time? 

You can’t speak for any of us. I can’t speak for every fat person because not everyone has the same experiences as me. 

I’ve been bullied for my weight in real life as well as online. People have called me ugly just because of my weight. By the way, your weight doesn’t equal beauty, and that’s what I’m still learning. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. 

On quite a few occasions, I have actually thought about doing dangerous things to my body that I don’t feel comfortable going into here. All because I had people try to boil me down to my weight, call me ugly, and destroy whatever self-esteem I had left. You don’t know what fat people go through, so don’t act like you do. 

There are many factors that go into why a person may be fat, including medical conditions, mental illness, trauma, genetics, etc. All of those things are none of your business unless those people decide to be open about it. 

No, it’s not always healthy to be fat (obviously there are extremities on both sides of the spectrum of weight that are extremely unhealthy), but it doesn’t make a person any less of a human being. Fat people are human too. Quit treating us like we’re not. We deserve to be treated like everyone else who isn’t fat. I’m not saying put all fat people on a pedestal. I’m saying treat us like human beings.

CC (Combination of the fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh screenshots, aka, the second part of my response):

Remember how I said that fatphobia isn’t just about judging people for being fat? Well, there’s the “fat tax” on plus-size clothing (even though it maybe only costs a little bit more in fabric, if there’s any difference in making clothes for people who aren’t fat), limited styles for fat people in stores (making a lot of us have to buy fast fashion or have to spend a fortune on clothes that actually flatter us), not very many stores have inclusive sizes still (if you don’t at least carry max 5XL or a size 38/40 in pants size, you cannot call yourself inclusive), and a lot of other things.

Many fat people, myself included, are afraid to seek medical attention for anything (even checkups) because of doctors who only focus on our weight and not on what we came in to see them for. They write it off as if our weight is the sole cause of our problems, which isn’t always the case.

How about we talk about how expensive it is to eat healthy in a lot of places? Not everyone can afford to make fresh meals every day, let alone once a week. Maybe they were never taught how to due to their upbringing. You don’t know.

I’ve had people comment on my weight, what I’m eating (even if I’m eating something healthy like fruits and veggies), talk about my weight or diets EVEN WHILE I’M TRYING TO EAT, and it’s caused me to wait until I’m alone or around someone I trust to eat anything. As a result, I have a complicated relationship with food now.

Telling someone they’re fat doesn’t help them. They know that. They see themselves every day. People may want to change, but they either are afraid to ask for help, or they don’t know where to start. Some may not want to change. It’s up to them, honestly. If you want to help them lose weight, maybe suggest any physical activity they’d have fun doing and do them with them? I dance for fun. Also, you could help set up meal plans with them. 

If you’re not going to at least try to help them lose weight if you’re so concerned about them (this is all if they actually want to change things and don’t know where to start), I cannot say this in a sweeter way: shut your mouth and mind your own business. Because you’re just being a cunt at that point.

CC (eighth screenshot, aka, the third and final part to my response):

There are quite a few plus-size people in the entertainment industry as a whole who are/were very successful. Remember the late Chris Farley and Aretha Franklin? Chris Farley was big, but that didn’t change how great of an actor he was, how funny he was, or how much of an impact he made in the entertainment industry. Aretha Franklin was a plus-size black woman in the music industry, but she’s inspired SO MANY artists we have today! There are many plus-size men, women, and I believe even nonbinary people in the public eye in general. Like I’ve said, beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. That’s why the body positivity and body neutrality movements are a thing.

(I know I implied that I thought about sh here in my response, but please don't worry about me as far as that goes. I'm fine now. I would never go through with anything like that.)

In the last part of my response where I mentioned some plus-size people in the entertainment industry as well as the music industry (the late Chris Farley and the late Aretha Franklin), I was going to name more people, but my comments were getting too long. I'll name some more here off the top of my head:

Lizzo (rapper), the Piggy Dolls (the first K-Pop girl group made up of actual plus-size women), K*v*n Sp*c*y (I don't feel comfortable saying his name because he's a disgusting person, but he's another plus-size man...he was in King of Queens and in A LOT of movies), PSY, Greyson Gritt (a genderqueer person in the music industry), Elle King, Produce Pandas (the first music group in China full of plus-size men), Martha Wash, Chubby Checker, Fats Domino, Big Angel (a J-Pop group of all plus-size women), Chubbiness (another J-Pop group of all plus-size women), Pottya (another J-Pop group of all plus-size women)...there are so many that I found, but if you want to add more plus-size artists, plus-size actors, plus-size comedians/comediennes, feel free to add them in the comments!

Dhar Mann, you'll never know what plus-size people go through. You don't know what we go through. You have NO IDEA what we go through on a daily basis. Stop acting like you do. Because you don't, and you never will.

By the way, Dhar Mann, this will NOT be the last post I'll make about you or your videos. The more you make fucking deplorable, poorly written bullshit, the more posts I'll make! Teehee!

If you got this far, thank you so much. The next part of this is coming very soon. I'm sorry for not posting too many screenshots from the video. I wanted to fit in my response because it's important for people to see.

Have a good day/afternoon/night, y'all. Love you!

[vedanti-b]

Week 22- clip analysis and editing.

This week was just before our mocks so sir gave us clips to practice when we were on a break so that we could practice at home and send him our answers .seeing some of the clips for practice made me realize how each clip uses one or more of the 4 things to use . The clips that I watched were : 

1)The Gladiator:- The Gladiator:

This was the first clip I saw and attempted to write an answer for since we were writing the answer to all four aspects which is, mise-en-scene, camera work, sound and editing it was tough for me to finish the answer in the time given since there was so much to write about and I had not planned my note making which I was supposed to do. Due to this, I was unable to write about all points.

2) Bajirao Mastani

I had watched this movie in the theaters. This was a beautifully made movie all details were a remake of the ancient Indian empire. There was so much to talk about this scene that I questioned myself about what should be written down and what would be ok to leave out. The mise-en-scene paragraph for this clip made up most of my answer.

3) Last samurai

This was one of the films I had watched in the past and I loved the setting of the whole movie, a very well made movie with a beautiful storyline. This clip had the best of everything and most of my points were equally distributed between the 4 four factors.

4) Avengers

Being one of the fan favorites, and the one with the most happening in its scene made it hard for me to concentrate on the 4 aspects on which we had to analyze it and instead I got a bit distracted with the scene itself. Yet I somehow managed to write down about most points which was a good thing for me as I have been struggling with the speed of my writing 

5) Pursuit of Happiness

This clip was one of my favorites as I had already watched this movie quite a few times and the actors had done an amazing job at making the views emotionally attached to a scene. The clip analysis for this particular clip took me a long time to complete. There were small details that were important to point out. The clips before were more challenging, although now as I was repeatedly practicing I was able to structure my answer in a proper format and write down about all the points in my answer. 

Since the opening had to be short we could not include a lot of scenes that we had filmed since that would make the opening too long as they were one takes which were had to cut from the middle. So I cut out the house scene entirely put only a part of the class room scene that we had initially shot.

 This was quite disappointing as a lot of our hard work had to be put aside as extra work. But this also put us in a safe spot since if something seemed like it was not going to work out we could change up our opening a bit. We didn't necessarily have to do this as all the shots that I wanted to put in the film were well taken by my cinematographer. 

I had to render the first establishing shot since it was unstable and did not have a smooth pan, so we stabilized the shot and looked much better after that.  

^my director and I sat down to edit the opening.

Even though the clip analysis clip will be coming from an American drama as mentioned in syllabus Sir wanted us to get more exposure than only American drama so he gave us clips from all types of films.