#I was having Siffrin feelings even back then huh

[primrosechronicles]

Sky Cotl x ISAT Fanfic!

Performance Guide and Siffrin (strictly platonic)

Summary: Rekindling bonds Warnings: MAJOR SPOILERS FOR ISAT (?) Word count: 1951 PART 1 HERE

“Mom! Mom, hurry! The play is about to start!” You say, pointing towards the path leading to the Theater, where vibrant lights shine, the sounds of the people fill your ears as you feel your fate changing with each step you take towards the theater. 

You grab your Mom’s hand and hurriedly pull her towards the theater, she laughs at the action and taps your shoulder “Starlight, remember what the director told you? About patience?”

You nod excitedly “Yes I do! They said—” you clear your throat and try to emulate the Directors voice “‘For patience is key, the best performances come from those who take their time and let the magic unfold naturally.’” Your Mom giggles and ruffles your hair “That was pretty good! You’re really paying attention at those theater workshops huh?” 

You breathe in and out, the tension slowly begins to ease from your body. You look ahead at the Village Theater, its familiar silhouette becoming clearer with each step. Memories flood back—rehearsals, acting classes, script writing, shared laughter with your classmates, and the Director.

When you first step foot on the island, your memory of them becomes even more clearer with each step you took, and you honestly can't believe that your home was just mere seconds away.

Home.. Ha! That word seems so foreign to you now, you had a home before, but that was so long ago.. You don’t know what it's like anymore. You have a family, (not that you aren't grateful for them!) You love your found family, but that never really stopped that yearning feeling of wanting a family, a permanent home.

You stop walking, Do they even want you? Do they still consider you as family? You start to panic– what if they really don't want you? Oh stars, what if they hate you? You feel a large hand on your shoulder “Sif?” 

"Nervous?" Isabeau says softly, as if reading your thoughts. "Yea… it’s just, I haven't seen these people for so long, years… Decades! have passed for us, to them it’ll feel like only seconds, would they even recognize me? Would they still see me as family?” 

Recognizing your distress, your feelings buddy, Mirabelle, holds your hand. "Time may have passed, but family doesn't forget," she says reassuringly. "They'll recognize you. To them, you'll always be family.” 

“Just like we’ll always remember you Frin!” Bonnie buts in. “And, no matter how much time has passed, you’ll always be Family to us.” Odile added.

You smile and stay quiet, despite the reassurance of your family, it's still very nerve-wracking to you; you can’t stop the millions of thoughts racing through your mind. But, with your family with you, you know you’ll be okay. 

And so, with a very nervous heart, you all walk hand in hand towards the theater.

You see four people huddling around a person, from their body language, you assume they’re helping the Director— … “Director?”

They all snap their heads towards you, Your body trembles with anxiety; Lifting your leg to take a step feels so hard to do. it’s like all the strength from your body has disappeared. You try moving forward but it's as if a heavy boulder weighs you down. Stars! Why is this so hard? Harder than all the things you’re used to doing. because at least with those, you had some idea of what to expect. Now, you're stepping into the unknown, uncertain of what lies ahead. Bracing yourself, you hear the sound of footsteps approaching.

You see the Director staring back at you, their expression hidden by their penguin mask “H-hello..” you stutter, your voice breaking “do you all-.. Remember me?... I don’t know if you guys recognize me but uhm..” 

Your voice trembles and you avert your gaze from them. Your breath hitches in your throat. “I-I.. Used to take classes… here.. I’d tell you my name but… I guess I’ve forgotten my lines…” you chuckle pathetically.

“Astrophel…?” You look up, their mask now replaced with a quivering lip.

They move closer to you and wrap their arms around you “Director..” you whisper.

Stars… You haven't felt their embrace in ages; you can hardly remember the last time. It's almost unbelievable—here they are, holding you, and it's real. 

You start to hold on to them for dear life as you cry on their shoulder and your knees start to give out as your eyelids become heavy. You feel them carry you towards...

You slowly wake up, your eyes adjusting to the lights of the building. You find yourself on a makeshift bed made of pillows.

As you take in your surroundings, you see that you and your makeshift bed is beside the mini stage.

You gasp, you remember this stage! This is where the Musician held their music lessons! You laugh as you remember the Musician teaching an easy music sheet to play, but when it got to the actual recital, the Musician accidentally taught the wrong song to half the group, leading to a very chaotic performance. 

Sitting up, you gaze down at the floor below. You see Isabeau, Mirabelle and Odile conversing with the Director, nearby, little Bonnie is clumsily playing the kalimba on a table, using it as a makeshift stage. Despite the awkward notes, the rest of the performance crew cheer them on, clearly enjoying the impromptu performance.

You walk over to the table where the Director and others are at.

“Ah! Afternoon Astrophel! How was your nap?” The Director Asks. “Astrophel… Do they mean Siffrin?” “Maybe.. They look like an Astrophel.. I do wanna know what it means though " "You want to know everything about Siffrin, Isabeau…”

You notice that the Director has their mask on again and that they’re holding a book, you walk over to them and point at the book “What’s that?” 

The Director blinks at you “A book..?” “No- like.. What’s in the book?” 

“Oh! I was just showing your friends all the photos I took when you still attended my classes!”

….what.

“Siffrin! You were such a cute child back then!” Mirabelle exclaims.

What??

Odile asks “You seem to be wearing the same cloak as you did in these photos… do you even wash it..?” 

WHAT……….AND OF COURSE YOU WASH IT????????

“You look very edgy in your tween years though.. So much eyeliner” Isabeau observed, looking at the rest of the photos.

You lift the collar of your cloak to cover your face. Oh my stars! you can't believe he saw that…..

You see Bonnie walk up to where the Director is sitting “Frin when they were a baby? I wanna see!”

NOPE! You try to grab the book as fast as you can from the Director…but CURSE THIS HEIGHT DIFFERENCE! They’re hanging the book from right over your head!

The Director runs to the side of the table opposite from you. You run to the right side of the table; the Director goes the opposite way. And it becomes a game of cat and mouse. 

You fly over the table and he dodges.

“If you’re both gonna run then do it outside!” The Dancer shouts.

You see the Director give them a thumbs up before they bolt out the main entrance. Without hesitation, you run after them.

Exiting harmony hall you see them leaning on the building, book in hand. You try to get the book from their hand but they stop you.

The Director chuckles “Don’t worry, your emo phase is safe with me.”

“Then why even try showing it to them..?”

They think for a second “I… wanted to get an excuse to talk to you I guess.”

You blink at them in surprise. They raise their hands defensively. “You know, I find it awkward to ask people to talk. I know that sounds weird coming from me, but...”

They pause, then continue, “Even though my job needs me to communicate constantly, I struggle with initiating personal conversations. I always worry I'll come across as intrusive or awkward.”

You nod at that, finding what they said relatable. “Let's talk then?”

“Shall we go to Hermit Valley? I remember that little piece of land you liked to go to when you wrote your plays.”

You both land gently on the giant rock that sits in the middle of the sea of clouds. Before you, the sky is filled with the colors of the setting sun, casting a warm, golden glow across the ethereal landscape. You hear the sound of their mask drop to the ground.

“The sky looks so different now that those… shades..? Are here.” “Colors.”

You look at them; you see them looking back at you “What..?” “That “shade” is called a color Astrophel… or would you prefer Siffrin?”

“Oh! Uh.. Astrophel is fine…”

They nod and turn their gaze back to the sunset. 

A peaceful silence envelops both of you. You feel the urge to speak, knowing that's what they wanted. After a long moment of contemplation, they finally break the silence.

"I've missed moments like this," they say softly. “I remember when your mother used to have me babysit you… we used to go here.” They gesture to the rock.

They sigh “It feels like yesterday you were only thirteen.. But… It also felt like I was in that void for an eternity.”

“....thirteen years,” The Director blinks at you. “What..?”

“The… island has been gone for thirteen years.” you repeat.

The Director's eyes widen in shock and disbelief, and they stare at you, trying to process the words. "Thirteen years..." they whisper, the weight of lost time settling heavily in the air between you.

You take a deep breath, and exhale slowly, gathering your thoughts. As you begin to speak, the words come hesitantly at first, but soon they flow with the tide of pent-up emotions.

“I remember the day the island disappeared," you start, your voice barely above a whisper. "I… foolishly ran away from home because… I didn’t want to eat my vegetables…” you cringe “I.. wanted to scare my parents a bit… So I took my dads boat and then sailed a few feet from shore, then… I just saw it disappear.”

You glance at the Director “In the aftermath, I could not remember anything related to this place…”

“One day…” you continue “I saved these three people from a very strong monster. Because of that, they asked me to join them to save their country… and I did.. Because I had nothing better to do. Little did I know that these people will become.. My rock just like this one” you chuckle, patting the surface beneath you.

You pause, taking another deep breath, feeling the weight of your next words. “And then, there were the loops. They helped a lot at first… but when we beat the King… I realized that I was trapped. Everything after that was just me doing horrible stuff to get out of my horrible situation. Time became a relentless, unyielding cycle.”

Tears well up in your eyes, your voice trembling with emotion. “It’s been thirteen years, and so much that i remember has changed. I’ve missed you so much. I'm so sorry to have forgotten— no… to have abandoned you.”

The warmth of their embrace envelops you. You feel their heartbeat, it reminds you that you are present in this moment; you lean in, crying into their shoulder. “Don't say sorry… you couldn't have known that the island would disappear…” You hear them sniffle. “And I’m so sorry I wasn't there for you… you shouldn't have gone through that.. The King.. The loops.. Having to fend for yourself at such a young age…” 

The two of you sit there, your bond now rekindled. The silence that follows is not empty but filled with warmth. 

A/N: YAYYYYYYYYY PART TWO IS FINISHED AFTER DAYS OF PROCRASTINATING!!!!

ugdhjdkjdxcnzkxjz this was so fun too write...

i was ubering people today and told them about my ifc... they asked for the link and they said theyll read it for their bed time story JKDAKDKNANKJX

aaaaaaaaaaaaand tysm for @kyri45 for being an inspiration! LOVE YOUUUUUUUUU

[rose-petal123]

If anyone wants more isat cyberpunk au content I wrote this short little thing with Isabeau and Siffrin if ur interested... It's literally just them talking about stars within the au. Fanfiction. Giveth thee. Note: this is my first time writing in a LONG time there might be mistakes etc.

There's a slight breeze in the air this late evening. You find yourself walking in one of the darker parts of the city your party was passing through. Why? To look up at the bright dots in the sky. You knew them to be called stars… even if they were a hologram projected at the sky, it was nice to look at. You'd rather have the real thing though.

You adjust your hat and sit down on a bench away from any street lights. Blinding light pollution. You didn't enjoy how overwhelmingly bright city lights were.

“Hey Sif!” You turn your head to see Isabeau, Isa, walking over to you. It's surprising he found you… you were sure you wandered pretty far from the inn. Isa sits down next to you, “What are you doing all the way over here?”

You slowly look back up at the sky. “Stargazing.”

Isabeau follows your gaze. “Huh! Pretty impressive they got it to look like that. Right?”

…Wrong. You know some of the stars don't look right. You don't remember how exactly you know this but you can just feel it. You shake your head in response.

Isa’s smile fades a little. “Why's that?”

“The…patterns are wrong.” you answer.

“Patterns?”

“The um… umm con- const-” you snap your fingers a few times, trying to jog your memory. “Constellations!” You manage, smiling when you remember the word.

Isabeau simply blinks. He doesn't seem to completely understand what you're talking about. So you decide to elaborate.

“Constellations are like… stars that form shapes in the sky.” You point upwards. “The projection. Some of them are out of place… or just missing entirely.”

“Ohhhh…” Isabeau tilts his head back up at the sky. You can't tell what he's thinking. Oh stars, what if he thinks you're weird for being so particular about it- “Cool!” What.

Isa looks at you with a warm smile. “That's pretty impressive, Sif! That you can remember what it's supposed to look like!”

You feel your cheeks turn a shade darker. “I-Impressive…?”

“Yeah!” His eyes sparkle with excitement. “It would be really nice to see the real thing someday.”

You frantically nod. You'd kill to see any stars that aren't a hologram pointed at the sky. Be away from the bright electronic city lights.

Isabeau crosses his arms, fingers tapping on his metal arm in thought. “Someday. Maybe- if you'd like to, I mean-” he pauses, waving one of his hands as he continues. “Maybe if we get the chance to, we should do that.”

Your eye lights up. “See the real thing?”

Isa nodded, “Yup! I'd love to know what those uh- con…?”

“Constellations.”

“Constellations! I'd love to see what they're supposed to look like.” Isa smiles.

You fidget with the little gems hanging off your currently deactivated weapon. That sounds like such a nice idea. You'd love to sit under the stars with Isabeau, or even your whole party if possible. A real sky. With real gorgeous stars shining brightly.

You slowly speak up again. “If… if we get the chance, I'd like that.”

Isabeau beams, “Alright! It's decided then! We'll definitely go stargazing with a real sky if we can in the future.”

You smile, “Yeah…” pause. “Guess we'll have to…plan-et out.” you smirk.

Isabeau laughs, “Good one, Sif!” You love when he laughs! He has such a nice laugh!

“Thanks.” You sit up proudly.

Isabeau taps the screen on his forearm, seemingly checking the time. “Oh crab! It's pretty late-” he looks at you. “We should probably head back.”

You nod. “Right.” You had wanted to sit and stare at the fake stars for a while longer…but it's okay.

The two of you stand up and head back to the inn. You're glad you got to talk to Isabeau about the night sky.

[oxen-nyx]

So this art is actually years old (and doesn’t really reflect my current artstyle all that much lol) and I cannot for the life of me remember if I already posted this or not BUT!!!

I shall post it (again possibly)

The fancomic below is of START AGAIN START AGAIN START AGAIN, the prologue of In Stars And Time to avoid confusion. So yeah.

I forgot I even made this. Ha.

SPOILERS FOR START AGAIN START AGAIN START AGAIN BELOW (I think, I honestly can’t remember but the general vibe is spoilery I think)

[abowlofsourcream]

⏳💫Congrats, Everyone! You got Memory of Rotting!💫⏳

You will never forget this…

…

You should come to the Favor tree after you’re done, Adventurers…

…

TW: PANIC ATTACKS, WARNING! SHARP!(DAGGER) MENTION, RESTRAINING, AND THEMES OF DISSOCIATION! Please be mindful before reading!

v Afterwards v



*Everyone is acting strange around you, like they know something you don’t…

*They probably do…

*You feel a bit off today, it would be okay if they were annoyed.

*Real sleepy too, which is weird because you definitely remember sleeping a lot the night before!

*And your stomach is killing you, but you don’t want to ask Bonnie for more snacks. That would be selfish of you.

*But that doesn’t matter anymore!

*You beat the king and now you are walking to meet The Head HouseMaiden!

*You’ll be home free!

*You reach the last room, where the Head HouseMaiden greets you…

*She tells all of you how grateful she was to them.

*Man this is great!

*…

*Why is everyone so quiet?

*She gives you time to talk to the others before she blesses you to move on!

*To go back your separate ways!

*To go back… Home…

*…

*… Huh.

*You talk with the other’s, and…

*Yep, they are totally acting weird…

*Isabeau was being extra weird, more than he usually was…

“You Okay, Isa? You’re sweating a lot…”

*Isabeau stammers at your question.

“O-oh! Y-yea! I’m all fine and good, Sif!”

*…

*You would usually find it kinda funny, but it was different.

“Okay… I guess I should talk to the Head HouseMaiden now…”

*You turn away, but.

“W-wait! Before you do that! I, uh-, need to tell you something!”

*Oh… That makes you feel weird for some reason!

“Um, Sif. Siffarooni. Siffrin! This may sound weird. It’s not bad, not anything bad! But you know now it’s the most perfect time to time!”

*You can see he is looking behind you as he says that…

*Why is he doing that?

“Um, Isa? Is this about that thing you said?”

*He looks at you confused.

“You know, the thing that you told me you would tell me after we beat the king”

*He blinks.

“I… What?” Did I tell you that?!”

*Oh? He didn’t say that? Has your daydreaming gotten that bad in the past two days?

*Stars, you’re so stupid!

“Siffrin?”

“I’m fine! I should just talk to the-”

*Isa grabs your shoulders.

*Woah!

“Isa?! What-?”

*Isabeau immediately lets go of you.

*He hasn’t touched you like that before, has he?

“Oh Change, I am so sorry! It’s just that you can’t talk to the Head HouseMaiden just… yet.”

*What in the Blinding Stars is going on?

*Why is everyone acting so weird.

“Isabeau, what is going on?! Why are you being so weird?!”

*…

*He isn’t even looking at you…

*What is he looking at?!

*You turn around to see Mirabelle and Bonnie and-

*And…

*The… Head HouseMaiden…

*…

*The things she is saying…

*You heard this before…

*About something going wrong.

*Something being broken.

*Rotting-

*…

*You start to remember things…

“Siffrin?”

*Odile walks up to the two of you.

*She tried to tell you once, didn’t she?

“Sif, what’s wrong?”

*Isabeau voice sounds so gentle… Just like that wonderful night under the stars…

*Your head feels like it’s splitting in two…

*You start to remember a lot.

*You’ve beat the King before!

*You won before, so why are you still all here?

“What is happening? Why are we here, again?”

*You remember your wish- Oh Stars!

*You remember your wish!

*Odile kneeled down to you.

“Siffrin, I am going to need you to breathe for a moment…”

*No! This can’t be it!

*Your…

*Your wish couldn’t have done this!

*You must be still asleep! Yea, that must be it!

*You just need to wake up!

*You.

*Just.

*Need.

*To.

*Wake.

*Up…

“Siffrin, are you listening to me? What is wrong?”

*…

*You feel through your pockets…

*You just need something quick, something shocking enough to make you wake up!

*You just need to find-

*Odile grabs both of your hands.

“Madame?!”

*Isabeau looks confused, not sure what you were looking for.

“Isabeau! Hold him in place while I look for his dagger!”

*No, no, no ,no!

*Isabeau quickly traps you in his arms…

*Odile searches for your dagger.

*SHE CAN’T DO THAT!

*You try your best to keep her away.

*Isabeau is keeping you in place.

“Frin?”

*Bonnie turns to the rest of them, terrified.

*The same way they looked when they were-

*You remember a sickly crunch.

*NO NO NO!

*YOU DIDN’T WANT THIS!

*THIS WASN’T YOUR WISH!

“ODILE, PLEASE! I NEED TO WAKE UP!”

*Odile grabs your dagger and throws to the side of the room!

*You try to squirm your way out of Isabeau’s arms.

*Odile grabs your face.

“SIFFRIN, YOU ARE NOT DREAMING!”

*No!

*No, you have to be!

*Your body feels like it’s trying to kill you…

“PLEASE, I CAN’T DO THIS AGAIN! I CAN’T TALK LISTEN TO HER AGAIN!”

*You never felt so helpless before…

“SIFFRIN-!”

“THIS IS WORSE THAN BEING ALONE! THIS IS WORSE THAN FORGETTING! THIS IS WORSE! THIS IS WORSE!!!”

*You see the Head HouseMaiden cradles Mirabelle’s face, crying!

*no!

*she can’t!

*Mirabelle turns to look at you.

*YOU FEEL A TUG.

*ON.

*YOUR.

*STOMACH!

<<<

*…

*You open your eyes.

*Your head is pounding…

*Your stomach hurts…

*Your whole body aches…

*You look around you.

*…

*Your… Allies are sitting around you…

*They’re watching you, worried…

*Mirabelle scooches close to you, carefully…

*Like you were dangerous…

*She is probably right.

“Siffrin… Do you… Remember what happened?”

*…

“I…”

*…

*You…

*Odile pressed her hand against your head.

“Jem’s, Siffrin you are boiling!”

*Oh…

*Isabeau stands up.

“Siffrin, let me take you to the Clock Tower… Can you walk?”

*You try to stand up…

*… You don’t get very far.

*He catches you and picks you up…

*You don’t deserve that…

“Bon Bon, take their hat for them?”

*Bonnie’s nods their head, gently picking up!

“Okay! Let’s go!”

*They all go there way to the clock tower…

*…

“M-mira?”

“…Yes, Siffrin?”

*…

“I’m sorry I screwed everything up…”

“… It’s okay, Siffrin. We’ll figure it out together…”

*…

*Together?

*…

*You hope so…

*But…

*…

*You’re not so sure how much longer you can go…

[vulpixisananimal]

Intermission

(There was something satisfying about the feeling of your boots hitting soft earth. Maybe it was the crunch of dry leaves and twigs. Maybe it was the occasional stone you'd kick down the road. Or maybe it was simply the satisfaction the family who walked behind you wouldn't be tripping over a particularly unsafe branch.)

(You were all on the road again.)

(It was a couple days since you all left Jouvente, things had moved fast once you recovered. Isabeau was getting sick of the place, and Mirabelle was itching to go on another adventure.)

("But where do we go next?" "How do we get there?" "What about Siffrins health?" "What ABOUT my health?" And these were just the questions asked out loud. Is Siffrin really ok? Are his headmates ok? Who caused this whole mess with mind craft? Can we trust Ramos?)

(Ramos. . .)

(The day before you all left Ramos accepted your offer to join. Said that they're going to pause the Defender training and go home. Since you all were headed there, Ramos was joining you. You still didn't know how to feel about that. Your family's opinion was split too.)

(Mirabelle was sceptical, but wanted to give them a chance. Isabeau insisted they're a good person. Odile was as wary as you were, and Nille thought they were alright. Bonnie said they were a "crabbing idiot" and left it at that. That made you smile.)

(So, that's where you were now. Leading the pack just like before. You, Mira, Isa, Ramos, Odile, Bonnie, and Nille in that order. Your group was getting sizable.)

"What do you think, Sif?" (You hear Mira call from behind.)

"Huh?" (You turn.) "Sorry, was zoning out."

"That's ok!" (she smiles.) "I was just asking if here's a good place to stop!"

(You shrug.) "I can go a few minutes more."

"Can you?" (She asked suspiciously.)

"I can! Look! I'm still fine from-" (You turned back to the road ahead and stopped. Holding up an arm.)

(There was a figure in the middle of the road, on the ground.)

(Mirabelle stopped, having long ago learned when you spotted something dangerous or peculiar. Isabeau on the other hand was as oblivious as ever and was walking right past you. You grab his arm.)

"Whuh-? What's-"

"You really suck at follow the leader." (you say, sticking your tongue out.)

"What is it, Sif?" (Mira asks, now looking ahead.) "Is that. . ."

"I'll check. All sneaky like, just in case~" (You start creeping towards the figure, careful and quietly, the loud clump clump of your boots before becoming nothing but a faded dream. You were good at this.)

(Step, step, step. . . It got clearer what the figure was as you got closer, lump of clothes? Someone in a lump of clothes, someone passed out! Oh! When you get to its side, you wave your family over. No danger.)

(Mira was there first and knelt down besides the stranger.) "O-oh! Oh no is, is it alright?"

(Next was Isa, going to check for a pulse and breathing.) "Well it's not dead? Just passed out."

"Does it not have a pack? Perhaps it was robbed." (Odile comments.) "After all, it's a long walk from the next rest."

(You shook your head.) "I didn't see one."

"No wounds or anything either." (Isa tapped his chin.)

"Maybe it. . . Didn't have one?" (Ramos comments from the sidelines.)

"Who'd be traveling without food and water?" (Nille kneels down, taking off her pack.) "Here, I'll give it some of mine."

"So kind Petronille." (Mira smiled.) "I'll try waking it up first."

(Mirabelle put a hand to the strangers heart, then up to its forhead. After a moment, the strangers yawned, eyes still closed, and smiled.)

"Good morning!!" (It says.)

"O-oh!" (Mira said surprised.) "U-uh, Good morning? Really it's good evening now, b-but!!"

"Are you alive?" (Bonnie asked, bluntly.)

(The stranger sat up.) "Oh! Yes! Yes I'm alive! Haha, I was just taking a nap! I think."

"You think?" (Said Odile, suspicious.)

"Yep!" (The stranger rubbed its head.) "Oh, oooooh stars what was I doing agaaaaain."

(Your ears perk up, stars? Ramos glanced over at you, and then asked.) "Are you, from that Island?"

"Huh?" (It looks up.) "Am I. . Oh! Oh! Oh that Island! I dunno, maybe." (It shrugs, and smiles.)

"Here, drink water." (Nille passes her water to it, it chugs it down.) "Try not to choke on it."

(The stranger coughes, and giggles.) "T-thank you! Haha! Oh right! I'm Jinn! (it/its)!"

(You all introduce yourselves. Huh, how'd we know it's pronouns already?)

(Don't question it.)

"I guess now is a good time to set up camp then!" (Mira says.) "T-that is if you're ok with it Jinn!"

"Oh! Oh no that'd be great!!" (It smiled. Did it ever open its eyes?) "I love meeting new people!! And I'm in no hurry!!"

>>>

"It's ready!!!"

(Bonnie yelled from the makeshift fire pit you helped prepare. Bonbon, Nille, and that stranger Jinn were all making a tasty dish while the rest of you were setting up. Everyone had a tent except you. You liked sleeping under the stars. Jinn was the same way, aparently.)

(You were very hungry.)

(Aaaaaaand who's fault was that~)

(You roll your eye. How could you forget, your favorite annoying star had shown up while making Isas tent. Listen, you THOUGHT you were fine.)

(You can think a lot of things Stardust~)

(You shake your head as you stepped over to the fire- WAIT-)

"IS THAT-"

(Bonnie held up a plate to you triumphantly.) "MALANGA!!! FRITTERS!!!"

(YES!!!)

(YES YES PLEASE STARS YES.)

(You take the plate from Bonnie and ruffle their hair.) "Thank you SO MUCH!!"

"Hehe!" (They were smiling so big and wide.)

(Stardust if you don't start eating RIGHT NOW-)

(Oh you didn't even wait a SECOND. You were scarfing down your food so fast. Yummy!!! Oh so so SO SO GOOD!!!)

"S-slow down Sif!" (Isa says, worried.) "I don't want you to choke!!"

"No I wanna see how far they'll go." (Nille counters.)

(You take bite after bite, finishing your food waaaay before anyone else. You put down your plate.)

". . . You 'aight, Siffy?" (Nille asks.)

(You burp.)

"Eeeewwwww"

"HAH!"

"Hehe"

"Manners, Siffrin!"

(You smile, and sink down in your cloak a little.) "S-sorry, it was really really good."

"Really? I couldn't tell." (Odile says sarcasticly. You all have a laugh at that.)

(Conversation ensues, mostly around Jinn. Who it was, where it was going, why it was passed out. The answer for all of them was the same:)

"I dunno." (It shrugged.) "I'm just going, forgot where I came from, forgot where I'm going."

"Doesn't that, worry you?" (Asks Ramos.)

"Haha, nope!" (It smiles.) "I end up where I end up, The Universe guides."

"And all we can do is follow." (You mumble, stupid Universe.) "So you remember that, at least."

"Of course!" (It tilts its head.) "I don't think I could ever forget that!"

(You shook your head.) "Well the Universe owes me after everything it put me through."

(You glance at Jinn, it looks, sad. It speaks up.) "W-well, you never really know what, what's going on with The Universe, right?"

"So?" (You question.)

"T-there, could have been some reason, o-or. . ." (It trails off and looks back down at its food. Looking at your friends, the awkwardness had spread. They knew what you had been through, and that The Universe was connected to it.)

(Stardust please, we nearly ended the world~)

(You sigh.) "It's fine. Done now, isn't it?"

"G-guess so. . ."

(. . . There's a long, uncomfortable pause before Mirabelle finds a way to break it.) "O-oh! Uh, I wanted to ask about The Universe, actually."

(Jinn perks up, looking happy as can be again.) "Oh!! What is it??"

(Mira rubs her hands together, nervous.) "W-well, I know it hurts to talk about, litteraly, but what does that phrase mean?"

"The Universe Guides? We Follow?" (Jinn replies.) "Just as it sounds! Everything happens for a reason! We learn to live with any hand we're dealt, adapt to difficulties, to rules or, or. . ."

"Or memories forgotten." (You say. Jinn nods.)

(. . . Why were your thoughts coming so easily when it came to home?)

"O-oh. . ." (Mira ponders for a second.) "It, sounds like a very strict God, if you can only follow what it guides."

"Yes and no?" (Jinn thinks for a moment.) "The Universe guides, yes, but how you take the path is up to you! To get from here to the ocean, you could follow the road, or go through the woods, or fly above them! It's about adaption! I guess it is more rigid than Change, though."

"O-oh r-right!" (Mirabelle nods excitedly.) "And!! Change tells us to seek change in ourselves, but lets us find our own way!! B-but also Change is. . W-well. ."

"A lazy God?" (Jinn giggles.) "That's ok! Change is nice!"

(You don't say? You note the earrings, one wish, one change.)

(What a strange person.)

>>>

(You wake up.)

(Why were you awake? Why were you around? It was midnight. No, probably far past midnight.)

(You can hear music.)

(You sit up. You were in your sleeping bag. That's right, you all were traveling again. It was a miracle you didn't need to front while you were on the road, you hated it. The sun. The dirt. The noises. The Heat. Ugh.)

(You look around. Everyone else's tents were set up. You could hear snores from some of them. There was another sleeping bag layed out nearby. It was empty. Who's was that again?)

(That was the stranger.)

(Ah. The stranger. It was less a memory of what happened, more just the knowledge that it did, in fact, happen. Jinn. Stranger. Islander. Where did it go? Wander off?)

(No, no you could see it. It was lying in the middle of the road. You got up, and walked over. The music got louder.)

(It didn't acknowledge your presence. It was staring up at the sky. You raise a hand-)

Nice night, isn't it?

(Your hand freezes. It spoke to you. You open your mouth, you ask how it did that.)

Lie down with me, it's a nice night.

(You hesitate, considering the now much more intimidating stranger. You decide to join it.)

(You ask-)

Relax. We have all night.

(You hush up, annoyed, and stare up at the skies. The night sky.)

(The Stars where alive, tonight. Alive and beating like hearts. You want to hold them. Grip them until they-)

That's not very nice.

(You wince. Do you mind?)

Sorry, but it's hard not to overhear your conversation.

(. . .)

Come now, there's two of you, aren't there?

(There is. You were in denial still, weren't you. That would mean you're not in control. . .)

(We're actors. Aren't we?)

(You huff. To you, maybe.)

What's your names?

(You wince again. Not used to it. Your name is Mal Du Pays.)

Vaugardian dialect meaning "Homesickness." Well not exactly Vaugardian but we don't have time explain all that. What a tragic name, do you like it?

(. . .)

. . . What about your friend?

(Name?)

Yes! You must have a name, right?

(. . . I don't really have one. Not yet, at least.)

(You need a name. Choose one.)

Now now Mal, give them some time. A names a big thing!

(I, don't know. I didn't think-)

Here!

(You look to your side. The stranger was holding something in it's hand. You take it, it was. . . A small stone? The stranger had one, and put it in it's ear.)

Go on, like I do.

(. . . You put the stone into your ear.)

(You hear music.)

Nice, isn't it?

(It was nice, the music sounded familiar, but you couldn't place it. You breathe in. . . And out. . .)

(. . . Lost one was what you called yourself, if you needed to acknowledge a self.)

Lost one?

(You don't want that name. . . . You'll go with Null.)

Null?

(A nothing.)

But you're not nothing! You're speaking to me now, aren't you?

(Perhaps. . . But you want that name. There's a phantom memory, of a play, one of the characters was called that, Null, a nothing.)

I know that play! Well, not exactly a play, but it's still a story! Swordsman with the gift of clairvoyance looking for a past he doesn't remember. Like you!

(You nod, it sounded familiar, it was familiar.)

I just hope your story ends better than his.

(You turn back to the stranger, it's smiling at you. There's stars in it's eyes.)

. . . Do you like the music?

(Yes. Yes you do. You both do. You look back to the sky. It helped you focus. Find yourself. You could count the stars, you could even remember the constellations.)

(You weren't being bothered by the hard ground beneath you.)

(You finally felt like the play had stopped for intermission.)

(You feel. . . Content.)

Do you want a pair?

(You do, you really do.)

Then you know what to do.

(. . . You did.)

(You look to the night, and wait. It might have been minutes, hours. You watched, until you saw a small streak of light slice the sky in two. You close your eyes.)

(Music to help you focus. Music to help you focus. Music to help you focus. . .)

(. . .)

(You open your eyes. Why did we do that? Why did we do that?)

(Why did you lie down next to a stranger, you didn't Even know who it was! You sit up. This wasn't right, there was something wrong. You turn to the stranger. You open your mouth.)

(Who. Are. You?)

Oh! Sorry, I should have introduced myself! I'm-

(You. You stare at the stranger. You knew that word. Your. Your hand is shaking. Your breath, quickening. You, you.)

(You're-)

You should go to sleep.

>>>

"'Friiiiiiin."

(You are being shaken awake.) "Mmmmrrrmmg five minuuuuutes...."

(Whoever's shaking you stops for a moment. Then you feel a very small body jump on you.)

"GWUH--"

"WAKE UP 'FRIN!!!"

(You clear the sleep from your eyes. Bonbon was waking you up. You were sleeping in the middle of the road, your sleeping bag was nowhere near you.)

"Uh, hhhheyy."

"Sleepwalking?" (They ask smugly.) "Ground taste good or something?"

"Haha! No I, I dunno actually!"

(You get up and dust yourself off. What WERE you doing last night? You don't remember. Maybe someone else does. Bonnie goes back to camp, your family is packing up.)

(. . . Jinn is nowhere to be seen. It must have left early in the morning.)

(You feel something in your hand. You open it.)

(A pair of small stones, there's the engraving of a crescent moon on them.)

(. . . Weird.)

[infiniteoreos]

okay ignore this i just had to get it out of my system sorry jshfjdn 

"siffrin."

(you didn't even notice odile approach you)

> "odile?"

"i...would like you to read this."

(she hands you a book, with a hesitance you've never seen her display.)

(the cover has no title, and the spine is sloppily hand-bound with string)

(you give her a confused look.)

"...it isn't done yet."

(she refuses to elaborate.)

(you carefully open the front cover.)

(the first page says "family" in near-illegible cursive)

(your throat tightens.)

> "a familytale...?"

(odile blushes. blushes.)

(you flip through a few more pages.)

(...it's the story of your entire journey, beginning with the moment mirabelle had asked you all for help.)

(you had forgotten most of this. the loops broke you more than you could ever realize.)

(but it's all here.)

(you flip a bit more. odile watches you intently.)

(it's all here.)

(an entire chapter is dedicated to you, to the king, to wish craft, the stars, the universe, to lightless sand, to a sea, dangerous but giving.)

(it's all here. all that's left of it.)

(because she knows how it feels, of course, having no connection to what was supposed to be your home.)

(...you quickly close the book to avoid getting any tears on it.)

"that bad, huh?"

> "...what?"

"you're crying. did i get something wrong? my memory isn't what it used to be. i apologize."

(you can't speak.)

(not in vaugardian.)

(you remember a short phrase, something you're sure your mother used to tell you, even if you don't know who she was.)

> "　."

(you said it.)

(odile couldn't hear it, of course.)

(but she understood anyway.)

(she repeats the same phrase in ka buan.)

(something you're sure her mother never told her.)

(...almost automatically, you hug her.)

(neither of you are known to enjoy being touched. but you crave it more than anything)

(you wonder if it's the same for her.)

(...you're the first to let go.)

> "i, uh..."

> "can't wait to read it when it's done."

(you hand the book back to her)

> "so far, you've gotten everything write."

(she laughs.)

(it's all here.)

[cute-as-buttons]

could not resist trying my hand at a drabble after seeing this post by @wanderingbards

spoilers for act 1 under the cut!!

(no traps here.)

“we're good, mira.“ you smile. ”see? everything's fine.”

you stand there, and a moment too late you realise that maybe, just maybe, you'd perhaps been wrong.

and as you live through the novel experience of your body being crushed by a rock, you feel a tug on your stomach. And-

[loop 1]

you sleepily open your eyes. your body feels sore.

were you on the ground too long?

you close your eyes again and breathe out. around you, you can hear the chirping of birds, and you know just a few moments away, is the bright and chattering town of dormont, who've still managed to keep up the levity even though the world might end tomorrow.

but it won't. because you and your friends will stop the king and save vaugard.

after all this time, your journey is nearing its end.

you smile, thinking of how much they've all grown since you've known them. you've been travelling for as long as you can remember, and while your memory has never been your greatest strength, you do know that this is the happiest you've ever been.

the sun is shining, peaking from behind the clouds, the air is warm and you and your party will make sure that the warmth carries over into tomorrow.

you will win. you have to.

(get up, siffrin. you have a country to save.)

you dust the stray leaves that found your way onto your cloak and hat when you hear a voice calling out your name.

“-frin!”

oh, yeah it's almost midday, you probably overslept. oh well, you had a nice nap.

you yawn and call out.

“i'm here!”

you barely get in a “hey, mira-!” she crushes you in a hug. you stiffen, your arms hanging at your sides. you don't know how to react.

is…this the first time she's done that? hugged you?

huh. weird.

she pulls back a second later, and you're about to crack a joke when you see her face.

mirabelle has always been an anxious person, but this feels…different. somehow.

she's always been anxious, but right now she looks terrified.

“i'm so sorry, i didn't mean to touch you, i was just so afraid i wouldn't find you here-” she says, clasping her hands together. she looks like she's about to explode in a ball of anxiety and burst into tears.

(didn't mean to touch you?)

you're so confused.

“hey, hey, mira,“ you say, gesturing to her. ”slow down. breathe with me?“

you put your hand on your chest and gesture for mirabelle to follow.

deep breath in. deep breath out.

you smile a little at her when she stops shaking.

”better?“

she nods.

”okay, now, what's wrong? what happened?“

something about you is bothering her. but you don't know what.

”i…“ mira looks at you, almost like she's in…awe? “do you not remember?”

your breath catches at that.

(what is it, what did you forget this time? was it a birthday, an anniversary? what did you forget??)

mirabelle looks upset.

YOU MADE MIRABELLE UPSET!!

(You need to rectify your heinous crime right now.)

“no, of course i remember,” you say quickly, trying desperately to figure out what you might've forgotten. “we were supposed to meet at the clock tower, and tomorrow we go and defeat the king and save vaugard! right?”

you look to her for confirmation. she looks at you like she's going to cry.

(wait…)

”wait,“ you say, shaking your head in confusion. ”what did you mean that you were “afraid you wouldn't find me here”? i told you guys i'd be here if you needed me right?“

(did you forget to did you forget to did you forget to did you-)

something in mira's face changes. she sighs and shakes her head. you're so so confused.

and you can tell that mira doesn't seem to be in the mood for answers. you get it. so…

”did you,” you start, smiling a little. a little smirk just to let her know you're teasing. “fall asleep and have a nightmare?”

it's an out, and she takes it.

she shakily nods and tries to laugh. it comes out more as a whimper.

“yeah, i guess that must've been it,” she says. “i'll be in the town if you need me.”

you watch her leave.

something is going on with her, and you don't know what it is, but you intend to find out.

maybe something happened while you were asleep. you should

[auncyen]

and another little scene THIS IS THE LAST ONE I'M POSTING UNTIL I UPDATE ON AO3 JUST BECAUSE I REALLY SHOULDN'T SPOIL MY OWN FIC THIS MUCH but like. I'm also just excited that I'm writing. And the mental image of this scene has been in my head for way too long lol

-

"You're…real this time, right?"

Siffrin has always been on the quiet side, but this question could have been whispered by a mouse. You nearly miss it; Isabeau reacts first while you're still parsing it. "Sif? Of, of course we're real! Can't you tell??"

Siffrin flinches away, shrinking into their cloak with a faint "sorry", and you know.

They can't. They can't tell. Not well enough to be sure.

Have they been hallucinating? How long, that they're doubting their own sight right now? "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry," they whisper. "I'm sorry, I lost you. I'm sorry, I have to make sure you're fine, I have to be sure, I have to loop back--"

"Siffrin," you say loudly, just as their hand lights on their dagger. Why is he reaching for his dagger if he's going to loop back? No, no, that's not the issue right now. The issue is that they cannot loop back. You'll forget everything. He won't tell you again, not if this is how things end. You cannot have him looping. "If--If you can't trust that you're seeing us," you say, thinking quickly. "What if I touched you?"

Your question works in that it distracts Siffrin. His eye widens as they stare at you, the surprise clear as crystal on his face. "Huh?"

His hand falls away from the dagger.

You don't like that it was there to begin with, but you need to convince them while you have their attention. "If you're doubting sight and sound, touch would be the next logical option. It may be distasteful to you, but…" You raise your left hand with a deliberate slowness so that it's clearly in their vision. "If I touched you, would that be enough reassurance?"

He stares at you for a moment. The 'no' is already ringing in your mind. If he goes for the dagger again you'll need to use your Craft to slow him down and grab him--or hope Isabeau grabs him--but why would he reach for the dagger? He said he was going to loop, he said he was going to loop last night, how does he choose when to loop when he's made it clear he can't control the looping itself? The only answer coming readily to mind is abhorrent--

His hand moves up, further away from the dagger. Both of his hands reach up to the top of his head, snatching his hat off to hold by the brim as he stares at you, light eye unblinking.

"You want me to put my hand on your head?" you guess, trying to make sense of the silent response. The question elicits a nod, and it seems…logical enough--their cloak and gloves would mute any touch on his body, and the face and neck would likely feel too vulnerable--so you move your hand toward the bird's nest of hair, still slowly, not wanting to alarm them. He's so tense. "Breathe, Siffrin." You don't want them panicking, and you certainly don't want them fainting, either.

He breathes deeply in a familiar way. In and out. He still stares at your hand as it approaches, but at least he knows it's coming. Both his hands are occupied with the hat and won't make a Craft sign by accident. He has time to object, either with words or a gesture, if he realizes it will be too much.

You lower your hand into his hair in a waltz count, one-two-three. Immediately you encounter tangles and take care of where your fingers go in his unkempt hair. He tenses up even more, his breath hitching, but otherwise doesn't move. You hope that means they trust you.

"I'm real, Siffrin," you tell him, putting all the self-assurance you can muster into your voice. "As are Isabeau, Mirabelle, and Boniface. We're fine. We were only separated for a few moments."

"…Anything could have happened," they whisper.

"Nothing did. And even if it had, we're a bit hardier than that."

He winces. "I'm sorry I lost you."

You can't help the dry exasperation that creeps back into your voice. "Then don't storm off again. Straightforward enough, don't you think?"

He quickly nods several times, the motion frantic under your hand.

"We're here, and we're okay. You're…" They're not fine. You can't bring yourself to say that they're fine when it's plainly untrue, especially after how often they've misused that word in the past day, but you need to reassure them somehow. "You aren't alone. We're here with you. Do you trust me?"

The nods are less frantic this time. He seems to be calming down. He's still rigid, though. Touch has done its job and now it's only making them uncomfortable, so you start to take your hand away--

And then they bunt your hand with their forehead. Their eye darts up to look you in the face before it widens in horror. Siffrin takes two quick steps back, his gaze dropping back to the floor as he jams his hat back on. "Sorry! Sorry!" With his shoulders hunching up, his cloak and hat eclipse his entire expression.

"Siffrin?" Mirabelle asks. Isabeau and Boniface are both looking at you, likely trying to gauge what Siffrin did that they're apologizing. You're trying to figure that out yourself. The way he moved…certainly, you're not harmed. They tapped against your hand with only a little bit of force; if anything, it reminded you of how one of Ka Bue or Poteria's many friendly stray cats, comfortable around people, would sometimes ease up to you as you were reading in the open and bunt your hand to signal they wanted to be pet.

You doubt that was anywhere near Siffrin's intention. They hate being touched. Still… you wonder what that expression meant. Before he'd gotten scared, the expression he'd given you had been almost…

The only way you'll figure it out is if you ask. And if, hopefully, you get a straight answer. "What are you apologizing for this time?"

[livesworthlivingau]

Lives Worth Living Chapter 11

ISAT Spoilers below!

"So… 30 years huh?… Wow..." (Isa started, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. The two of you were alone again as everyone settled in for the night.)

"I-I know… I'm sorry Isa, I should have told you sooner, I- was panicking and I didn't want to scare you and-and-"

"Woah! Hey! Deep breaths, Sif, okay?.." (He spoke softly, walking over to gingerly take your hand in his.)

"I can't imagine what you're going through right now, and you told us in like what? A week? That's a win in my book!" (He let out a hearty chuckle as you join in with a lighter giggle, still on the verge of breaking down again as you tried your deep breaths.)

"Besides, the King and all that just happened for us, so we've been going through a bit too. Just... don't worry about that. I'm so glad you told us, that's all that matters." (There it is… His giant sweet smile… You could never resist that face. You grip his hand back tighter and nod, letting out a little sniffle.)

"Okay… a-and… i-if this makes thing's… uhm.. weird? I-l understand if you don't wan-" (lsa's hand rose to your face, slowly cupping your cheek. He stared for a moment, his eyes asking for permission. You feel your face darken before giving the slightest nod, the both of you closing your eyes before he leans in to press his lips against yours. Your heart flutters madly, holding him close and savoring this moment for as long as you can. Almost wanting to pull him back when he finally breaks it.)

"Heh… Wow… I-I guess you've had a lot more practice then me at this point but uhhh… was that… nice?"

"Hehe... It was just as perfect as the first time~." (You watch as his face erupts in a deep, dark shade of blush. Looking away some and making the cutest little noises.)

(The both of you finally turn in for the night, snuggling up close as you've so dearly missed. You enjoy the best night sleep you've had since you looped again.)

------------------------------------------------------

(Early the next morning, the both of you lie in bed lazily, enjoying the company and not wanting the moment to end.)

"... S-So you're sure it's not weird?..."

"... Well I mean... maybe a little, yeah, like... If our relationship was some kinda test, and I had to study super hard and work my butt off to try and ace it... and you just have all the answers written on the inside of your hat." (He chuckled some, still blushing as he kissed the top of your head.)

"Buuuut. You're still Sif, my favorite Siffarooni! Even if you are a cheater~." (You pout a bit at his words, causing him to laugh yet again.)

"Just promise me you won't use any of that secret info for evil, alright?"

"Heh... No promises~." (You tease, reaching over to juuuust the right spot before-.)

"TICKLE ATTACK!" (You shout before Isa practically shrieks in a giggle, thrashing about as this secret spot, suddenly tumbling out of bed with you. The two of you plummet on the floor with a heavy thud, landing onto his chest with your face dangerously close to his again. You stare into eachother's eyes for a moment, faces heating up, then lean in closer for yet another ki-)

(The door swings open suddenly. Odile is standing there in her night gown, looking a bit concerned at first... then her face quickly turns into an annoyed scowl. She rolls her eyes and grumbles before just closing the door again. You both hear a faint-)

"They're fine!... more than fine even..."

(You chuckle a bit together before returning to eachother's gaze, leaning in again to share your second kiss... and third, and 4th a-)

----------------------------------------------------------

"So are you two gonna start being all gross and kissy all the time now?" (You choke on a bite on your breakfast, Isa freezing up some in response as well.)

"Boniface, it's rude to make fun of young love... so you're only allowed to insult Siffrin about it."

"H-Heeeey!" (You snap back as she smirks, still trying to recover from the choking.)

"C'mon you two, don't make fun of them for being in love, it's really cute!" (Mirabelle chimed in, she always loved hearing about your relationship, just like one of her novels. It was actually kinda empowering how she would cheer you both on so much.)

"Thank you Mira, at least someone appreciates true love~." (You tease, sticking your tongue out at the other two. The both of them make gagging sounds about it. Your whole family shares a nice chuckle about it... It's been a long time since you'd all been together... It was nice... You can't help but think this is the last time you want to experience this moment... this exact moment, as it is... You don't want to force things anymore, you don't want to relive the same moments over and over again, no matter how nice they were. You can't force your family through that again! You can't force them ever again!)

"Sif?" (You snap out of it suddenly, looking around at everyone staring at you, looking slightly concerned... You were gripping the tablecloth like a vice, bunched up in your hand. You let go, sinking into your chair a bit more as you hugged yourself.)

"... Sorry... I was getting in my own head again..." (Isa just gave that bright smile as always, putting an arm around your shoulder. He softly pulled you closer, planting a smooch on your head. Your face darkened deeply as he held you.)

"Heh, well then I'll just have to come in there and rescue you now and then!"

"Heh... be careful in there, it's quite the... mind field." (You get the familiar mixed laugh and groan from the group, just laying your head against Isa's chest. You focus on his breathing and heartbeat to help stay out of your own head... Slowly returning to the conversation at hand once you've calmed down properly. You all make plans for your route to Bambouche, sticking to the original idea since it seemed to work out before.)

[aimlesspixel]

I want to try and write a isat fanfic continuation so for now a first step on their new journey. Please give me your thoughts so I can improve!

The sun is warm, the smell of a fresh summers day wafts over, the darkless shades covering the field as your family walks alongside you. What a time to be alive huh? Vaugaurd is saved, you're free of the time loop, and your travels are picking back. The party back in Dormont was a good way to celebrate and you're glad for the downtime you got before setting off again with everyone.

Isabeau - "Madame, thanks again for getting the supplies we needed together yesterday." Odile - "It wasn't any trouble especially since they gave us so much as thanks for saving them."

They probably gave us a bit too much if you're being honest but it's nice that you won't have to worry about stocking back up for a while. You notice Mirabelle shooting you a glance and walk over.

Siffrin - "Something wrong?" Mirabelle - "N-no. I just wanted to see how you were feeling is all."

It has only been a few days since you managed to finally escape the time loop but after talking with everyone and expreiencing real days again you're feeling a lot better.

Siffrin - "I'm great honestly."

She glares at you for a moment as if trying to see through any lies you might have told before relaxing and smiling gently.

Mirabelle - "I'm glad, make sure to talk to me if you do start feeling bad, you promised after all." Siffrin - "I promise I won't leaf you hanging Mira." A slight smirk appears on her face. "Good."

Bonnie is as full of energy as ever. Actually they may have a more than before since you're all on your way to reunite them with their recently unfrozen older sister. What was her name again something with an N you're sure… Nico… Niel… Nille yes that was it Nille. The forest is finally coming into view which means you're about a sixth of the way to the next town. A pretty good pace if you all keep this up it'll only take a month to get to Bambouche.

It's pretty dark out now you've set up camp for the evening in a little clearing along the path. Bonnie's cooking up stew for everyone tonight. You sit on a log with Isabeau on your right as you eat.

Isabeau - "O-Oh Sif!"

He seems a little startled maybe you should have asked him but oh well he did just confess to you so he should at least be able to handle this much.

Isabeau - "H-how umm… how do you like the stew?"

It's a nice stew; hearty, warm, and delicious the spices compliment the meat well. "It's pretty tasty in fact I guess you could say…"

He looks at you with anticipation written all over his face. "that it's pretty stewpendous!"

He erupts into laughter - "YEAH YOU COULD HAHAHA!"

You catch Mirabelle giggling and Bonnie doing a small fist pump out of the corner of your eye. You enjoy the stew with everyone around the fire enjoying some light conversation. Finishing up you set your plate aside and Isa looks at you.

Isabeau - "Say Sif?"

He holds his hand out to you, you take it in kind and hear Mirabelle sqeak a little as you do.

"I was wondering… do you want a hat? I mean as your new clothing designer I've gotta know what my client needs so I wanted see if you need a new one seeing as we couldn't find yours even after talking to the head housemaiden."

Oh yeah now that he mentions it you have been missing it these last few days, it's kind of nice and kind of annoying not having it so it's a bit of a tough call you don't need it but it'd be useful too. You know whay if you're this torn you should ask Isa to make you a new one and just wear it as feels right. "I did wish for you to so... please do Mr.Amazing-funny-buff-clothmaster-Isabeau."

His cheeks turn a few shades darker "I'll make them the best you could ask for!" Even if it was the worst you'd seen you'd still wear them if Isabeau made them.

Odile sounding slightly exasperated - "Enough with the flirting you two. Clean your plates so we can all get some sleep."

[isatswap]

(spoilers for in stars and time. all of them. also to START AGAIN: a prologue.)

This World Destroyed

The prelude to TTOS events

The POV is ISAT loop's

Loop: --AND I WISH TO BE IN MY PLACE AGAIN!!!!

(You hear a loud cracking sound.)

(Like something being teared apart by force.)

(and then everything is engulfed in the weird shade)

(...)

(You wake up.)

Loop: ...?

(You can't make out anything around you.)

(There is nothing except a dim light seemingly coming out of everywhere.)

(Where....are you?)

(...!!!)

(There is someone approaching!)

The King: ....

Loop: Wait....THE KING?!?

The King: ...

Change God: *extremely loud incorrect buzzer* :P

(???)

(It's...the statue you've seen in the house.)

(Back when you were--)

Change God: brings back memories, huh (>ᴗ•)

Loop: But-- How--

Change God: didn't siffrin tell you about our meeting (¬‿¬ ) Change God: i am indeed real ヽ(°〇°)ﾉ Change God: though im not really the star of the show today (μ_μ)

Loop: That would be me, I suppose, teehee~

Change God: hihihi, you're funny (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) Change God: and i guess you are ( ◕▿◕ ) i mean you have to be something special to get a meeting with... Change God: IT.

Loop: It? And what would that be?

Change God: oh, you'll understand when you two will meet (^ω~) Change God: i'd love to talk more, but alas im only a ferryman in this situation (u_u)

(Ferryman?)

(You're not gonna die, are you....?)

Change God: who knows, really ┐(︶▽︶)┌ Change God: oh, here it comes! ＼(≧▽≦)／

(The statue runs away back into nothingness.)

(Before you can ask any more questions, you are swept off your feet by the ground seemingly disappearing.)

(The light is replaced by deep darkness, only slightly pierced by your bright head.)

(And then.... stars appear.)

(Countless stars, from all directions.)

(It's like you are in space....)

(Some of the stars seem to move independent from the others, first randomly, then concentrating in one place, some combining into a bigger ball of light, some beginning to orbit the ball.)

(And some concentrate into two vaguely hand-like shapes.)

(Some of the darkness seems to shape itself in a kind of cloak.)

(You suddenly find yourself not falling anymore, like someone switched the gravity off.)

(You look into the bright ball, trying to undestand what it is...)

(You feel like you should know.)

(You feel like you've always known.)

(You merely needed to remember.)

(It's--)

The Universe: Greetings.

(You want to say something back, but you can't)

(your body won't listen)

(you are paralyzed by fear)

The Universe: This is certainly an extraordinary occurence. The Universe: A will so strong... And to what end. The Universe: I wonder if you will think it was worth it.

(A will...so strong...?)

(Does that mean...)

(You manage to gather your strength and talk.)

Loop: D-did my wish come true...?

The Universe: ... The Universe: You know what happens when you break a wish?

(One of its hands picks a star from the halo--)

The Universe: It starts to misbehave, so to say.

(--and with a motion of fingers expands it.)

(It was not a star.)

(It was a planet.)

(It seems to be trying to break apart, the weird shade beaming from the cracks.)

The Universe: And you managed to break two at once. The Universe: The one you just made, and the one The Traveller made at the beginning of the cycle. The Universe: They cannot coexist, so they both unraveled, destroying themselves and damaging the world beyond reprieve. The Universe: Even I am unable to heal it. Even if someone could wish for it, that would just harm it even more. The Universe: So, alas...

(The ball suddenly opens at an invisible seam, revealing a monstrous maw.)

The Universe: I am taking this one back.

(...)

(You expected this to be loud.)

(Or to have any kind of sound.)

(But it was eerily quiet.)

(Like nothing ever happened.)

(Like that world....Your world....Was nothing.)

The Universe: I do not blame you. The Universe: It must be terrifying.

Loop: W-what will happen to me?

The Universe: ... The Universe: Well. The Universe: I can tell you don't want the same fate as this world. The Universe: But your wish has broken, so I cannot let you proceed further. The Universe: The only compromise is that you stay here to witness everything.

(The Universe snaps its fingers.)

(Suddenly, two people appear to the either side of you.)

(One of them is Siffrin.)

(The other one is....You?)

(You freeze.)

The Universe: Now, the previous world might have been destroyed... The Universe: But that has happened before, and it was fine. The Universe: Right, LOOP?

(!!!)

The Universe: Truth be told, despite your wish breaking, it still holds somewhat. The Universe: So Siffrin will still get the fate you desired for them. The Universe: And their place will be overtaken. The Universe: Just not exactly by "you".

Loop: ...Will...Will they remember?

The Universe: ... The Universe: Siffrin will.

(Another snap of the fingers, and the two people are gone.)

The Universe: ...I suppose that is all that you needed to see. The Universe: We might meet again here. The Universe: But for now... The Universe: Enjoy your stay.

(A bright flash of light blinds you.)

(...You wake up on the bright floor again.)

(...)

(You don't want to get up.)

(You are unsure what you're supposed to do anymore.)

[the-gt-fairy]

More ISAT g/t! This time tiny size shifter Siffrin semi-inspired by that ask I got. I wrote this all in one sitting last night and am deciding fuck it and posting it

Context: Family is at a fancy party cuz they saved the country and get invited to fancy parties now. Siffrin is Not Having a Good Time with all the people

--

“You clearing the snack table, Sif?”

‘Snack table’ was a bit of an understatement. The set of platters nearly stretched across the whole wall, and each were filled with fancy dishes Isabeau couldn’t even begin to name. Sif had been hanging out there for most of the party, so he expected them to be stuffing their face.

But they only nibbled absently on a desert, shrugging at Isabeau’s question.

He frowned. “Hey, are you ok?”

They shrugged again, eyes flicking back towards the crowd. Someone nearby laughed loudly, and Sif flinched, shrinking in on themself.

Literally. They were actually shrinking, dropping in centimeters by the second.

Oh.

“How about we go somewhere else?” Isabeau suggested.

Siffrin nodded and let himself be guided out of the main room and into the hall. Isabeau shadowed them, making sure no one was watching too closely, until they reached one of the copious amounts of sitting rooms.

It was empty, and that seemed to be good enough for Siffrin to let go of the rest of their height.

They stumbled, catching themself on their palms. Isabeau dropped to his own knees, hovering his hands around them.

Siffrin took the half-aborted offer for what it was supposed to be, using his little finger (god, their hand didn’t even cover his pinkie) to hoist themself up. Even once he was stable, he kept his hand on Isabeau’s.

Siffrin looked up at him. “...Hi,” he said, for lack of anything better.

“Hi,” Isabeau returned, just as clueless.

They looked down at their hand on Isabeau’s, then quickly tucked it back to their side.

(Isabeau stamped down his disappointment.)

“You can go back to the party,” Siffrin spoke up, “I'll be fine to camp out here till I can turn back.”

“Do you want to be alone?” Isabeau asked (stamping down his immense disappointment.)

He glanced away. “You shouldn’t have to look after me.”

“Ok, but do you want to be alone?”

“...No.”

Isabeau shifted from a kneel to a cross-legged seat. “Then I’m staying right here.”

They snapped their head up. “But, but you were so excited! For getting dressed up and stuff…”

“Eh, I already got to do the dressing up part,” he waved off, “I’m fine with missing out on the people.”

“You’ll miss out on the food, too,” Siffrin argued.

“I’m sure what Bonnie makes is a million times better.”

Sif snorted, bringing his hand up to cover his mouth. And he stopped trying to convince Isabeau to leave, so it was a win.

Siffrin eventually sat down, staring off silently. But, as usual, Isabeau couldn’t keep his eyes off them.

This was…This was his first time seeing them small, wasn’t it? The few times he had actually witnessed them sizeshifting, they had been giant. Fierce, protective, larger than life.

But now they were small and quiet, more so than Isabeau was used to. Was this how Siffrin had felt when he looked down on the four of them? That they were all so tiny and fragile, and that he would do anything he could to shield them?

Isabeau didn’t feel like he was being a very good shield. He was trained to be a Defender, but he didn’t have a clue what more he could do than sit there uselessly, not knowing if his shadow was more ominous than comforting.

Siffrin shifted, curling in on themself further. “It’s so blinding cold,” he muttered.

“You miss your cloak?” Isabeau asked. Siffrin hadn’t been very happy about giving it up in exchange for fancier clothes. (They looked even smaller without it.)

They nodded. “You said once–” A phrase that meant he was talking about the loops. “--that it was Crafted to regulate temperature. So I’d never get too hot or too cold.”

“Huh, I’d never heard of that before! I wonder if we can figure out how it works…” That would be amazing to implement when he actually started designing clothes.

Siffrin shivered again, cutting off the thought with another one. Right, smaller things didn’t regulate body heat so well, did they? He didn’t want Sif to suffer until he grew back, but what could he do…

An idea came to mind, followed by immediate doubt. Siffrin told them he actually liked touch, it was one of the first things he admitted after leaving Dormont. But Isabeau couldn’t help but feel he was overstepping every time he even tried.

Still, he slowly slid his hand over to Siffrin. “Hey, um. I’m probably warm (really warm) if you want to…”

He trailed off, but Siffrin got the message anyway. They lightly leaned against his hand, then practically melted into it.

Oh god. Oh Change. This was…man. Look at them, even smaller than his palm, snuggling closer just to get all the warmth. Haha, if they really wanted to be warm, all Isabeau would have to do is put them to his face and NO WAIT THAT WAS EMBARRASSING AND HIS FACE WAS EVEN HOTTER NOW CRAB–

“I can feel your pulse from here, ya know,” Sif teased.

AAAAAAAHHH

They pressed a little closer, probably just to goad him. “Thanks.”

“No problem!” he replied higher than he would like.

They looked up at him with their big , bright eye. “Sorry for being–” He got That Smirk on his face as he gestured to his spot. “--such a handful.”

“Pffft, Sif!”

They snickered, but the smile faded, and they looked away again. “Really, though. You shouldn’t have to deal with me like this.”

“Hey, we already agreed I’m not missing out on anything,” Isabeau assured, “I like spending time with you, Sif.”

“We spend time together all the time.”

“And I enjoy every second of it!”

They huffed, but their mouth ticked up again. “I’m not going to convince you, am I?”

“Nope! I’m going to care about you whether you like it or not! Well, I mean, I’d hope you would like it, but–but if I’m ever overstepping just say the word and I’ll back off–”

“Isa,” Siffrin cut off, “You’re fine. I really don’t mind.”

Isabeau softened. “I don’t mind either. This is only a small price to pay.”

Sif barked a laugh, doubling over as he cackled. Isabeau glowed at the reaction.

The two fell back into silence, but Isabeau felt like he was doing a much better job.

[abowlofsourcream]

⏳💫Congrats, Everyone! You got “Memory of Loss”!💫⏳

Unfortunately, you will never forget this!

…

With this memory, your Traveler will be able to read books from their country! Oh, but be careful! It’s best if we leave the past behind. You won’t want to worry your forgetful little friend, now would we?

…

I’m sorry, Bonnie…

v Aftermath v

* You feel his forehead on yours.

* You see their tears that fall to your hands.

* The hot breath on your nose, smelling like-

“…”

“Frin…?”

* Belle rushes in, but stops when she sees the two of you…

“Siffrin?”

*They grow still… Then turns to Belle, and back at you… His expression is… confused.

“I… I… W-why am I crying? Oh S-stars, that is so weird! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Oh! Sorry!”

*They turn to you wiping the tears, with a weak smile.

“Sorry to bother you, Bonnie. Didn’t mean to scare you like that! It feels like I’ve slept a little funny…”

* Frin wobbles as they stand and stumble’s their way past Belle.

*She rushes to you side, trying her best not to cry.

“Oh-Oh thank Change! Are you feeling okay? The others are taking to Loop!”

* You touched your forehead, still sniffling.

*She leans in closer.

“Bonnie? What’s wrong?”

“Belle… Frin touched my forehead.”

* She tilts her head, confused.

“…Huh?”

“Frin touched my forehead without me asking! That’s never happened here! I always have to warn him before even poking at him! But, He touched me first! It was quick too!”

* Belle stares at you for a bit, but then she slowly leans back.

“… Did they really?”

*You nod.

“And just now! I smelled it… On his breath!”

*She tensed.

“What?”

*…

“Burnt Sugar”

[vulpixisananimal]

"Did you tell Siffrin already?"

(You shouldn't be listening in like this, just go back to your room. Bonnie is ok, Bonnie is safe, even though they got hurt, they're safe. Listening in like this is just going to hurt your feelings.)

(Or at least tell you what they really think about you.)

"Not yet... Do you think they'll take it well?" (You heard Mira say.)

(Mira, Isa, and Odile were all talking in the common room they had at the Inn, Nille was making sure Bonnie was comfortable in their room after... All that.)

"Prrrrobably not... We should tell them anyways, though." (Isabeau was always looking out for you...)

"Indeed, talking goes both ways after all." (Odile.)

"True! Which I still would have liked you to do yesterday M'dame! I know Sif's been acting strange but..."

(You sigh internally. You were acting strange. You all were.)

(... It still felt weird.)

(There's three of you. Three Siffrins. Sometimes there's a gap of a few days you don't remember. You don't remember doing things you apparently did a few hours ago.)

(Sometimes the others were here, Loop, Mal Du Pays. Thoughts that weren't your own would bounce around your head, argue with you.)

(You weren't paying attention to what your family was saying anymore.)

(We need to tell them about, all this.)

(Now? Oh absolutely not Stardust, poor Bonbon just hit their head, they've got so much on their plate already~)

(You were the one who told me to be more open, Loop.)

(Yeeeeees, but there's a time and a place-)

"Hey Siffrin!"

(You snap back to reality, Nille was walking over.) "Feeling better?"

(You glance away, putting on a smile.) "Oh, yeah I'm feeling much better! How's Bonnie?"

"Oh lil Bonbon is resting up, Mira said they got a big booboo but they're great!"

(You relax your shoulders. As long as Bonnie was ok...)

(Nille raised an arm to put over your shoulder, pauses, then puts her arm back.)

"C'mon, we gotta figure out who that crabbing kidnapper was!" (Nille moved past Siffrin to join the others in the common room. You followed her. You still couldn't look her in the eye.)

(Odile, Isabeau, and Mirabelle were all seated and chatting, Nille joined them. Isa perked up seeing you walk in.)

"Sif!! You feeling alright? I got you fever medicine, and I wanted to maybe get you a gift because-"

"Gems alive Isa" (Odile pinched the bridge of her nose.)

(Nille made a half-laughing noise, and you sat down.) "I'm alright Isa, gift exchange can Wait," (You leaned in. Joke incoming.) "I just know any gift you get me will be my fever-ite."

(The mixture of laughter and pained groans was as sweet as always.)

"Thank you, Siffrin." (Odile said with a sigh) "Now, let's go over what happened."

(And so they started talking. Bonnie was grabbed in the farmers market while Nille was distracted, but was cut off by Mirabelle, who showed up soon after.)

"Thanks again for that, Mira." (Nille said with a smile.)

"O-oh! Well..." (She glanced your way- oh! Mira hadn't told anyone that it was a Loop, right... After some thought, you gave a nod.)

"Well! You should probably thank Siffrin actually!"

"Huh!?!?" (Wait that's not what you expected.)

"Hmm, yes why would you be thanking Siffrin" (Odile was looking at you.)

(You slump down in your seat, she probably already figured out what happened.)

(Just means you're all in now Stardust, unless you want to try going back again~)

(No. Absolutely not.)

"W-well, remember that story about, looping we told you about Nille?" (She nods.) "Well, this morning when I woke up screaming, That was because..."

(You pause for a moment, breath in, and out.)

"Because Bonnie was grabbed from the farmers market when I was there, instead of you. And, And I, I..."

(I told you. I told you not to tell them.)

(You keep breathing, it'll be ok, just keep breathing-)

"Hey, you did better than me." (Said Nille)

(... Huh?)

(she continued) "It it wasn't for Mirabelle I would have lost them too... So, I can't really blame you at all if you're worried about that."

( ... Oh.)

"And!! Since you were able to loop back, we got to try that again and Bonnie's ok!!" (Mirabelle interjected.)

"Although that is somewhat concerning you looped back even weeks since after we defeated the King." (Odile was thinking, it had been weeks after all. Defeat the King, party at Dormont, visit Bambouche and meet Nille, help things there...)

(You still failed though. We did. They wont forget that.)

(Can you just go away.)

"Who was that, anyway?"

(The conversation continues.)

"well, I didn't know! Their face was covered, but, but they must have been confident to try something like that here."

"Oh! What kinda craft did they use? Maybe that'll give us a clue."

"Protection craft, felt it when they tried to hit me, pretty crabbing bad at craft."

"If this was a professional I would have thought they'd target someone with Pierce craft. What were they wearing?"

"Hard to make it out, just a big old cloak and a nasty dagger..."

"Oh!! They did have some broche with a white star on it!! It looked familiar.."

"The Kings armor."

(The others turn to you as you speak up, you continue.)

"The Kings armor has stars on it, white stars." (Wishing stars.)

"I guess you would have seen it a lot..." (Thanks Mirabelle.)

"So this guy's related to the King somehow?" (said Isabeau, thinking.)

"Doubtful, but if they're related to the King, that would explain their choice of craft." (Odile continued,) "If they knew Siffrin was supposed to escort Bonnie then having a craft that beats his makes sense."

(The table fell silent, the King was frozen at the Pinnacle of the house of change. There was no way the King could still be an issue now. Not after all they had been through.)

(all you had been through.)

(What a wonderful joke, Universe! I'm laughing more than I have in a thousand loops! Ahahahahahhahahaha!!!)

(Gentler, please, we already have a headache.)

"We're trying to finish a house without all our nails," (Nille said, leaning back in her chair.) "Boniface is safe now, at least. We could at least go ask the Defenders about it."

"Tomorrow. Today's been headache inducing enough." (Odile said with authority. You opened your mouth to protest, but her look cut you off.)

"It could be nothing, too! Just some random accident, or something..." (Oh Mira...)

"I'm just too popular, naturally, my adoring fans wanted my attention." (You say cheekily.)

"Oh can I be your bouncer, Sif? Can't have your fanclub bothering you!" (Isa said with his big ol grin.)

"Of course! I would be honored-"

"Get a room you two!" (Nille said, obviously having fun with it. That made Isa very embarrassed and you turn away just a bit.)

"Is there anything else we should discuss while we're here?" (asked Odile, exasperated.)

"Nope! All good here!"

"I-I don't think So?"

"Nah, nothing to discuss."

"... Siffrin?"

(Odile was looking at you. You wanted to say you didn't have anything to add. You wanted to smile and say everything was ok.)

(Then why don't you.)

(Because they're our family, they deserve to know, right?)

(And if you are wrong about them.)

(Then we'll just loop back! As the Universe has forced on us oh so many times~)

(That.. hardly makes it any better.)

(Sooo we're agreed~?)

(... We will regret this.)

(Maybe... But we made a promise.)

(You open your mouth....)

[sixpossumsinatrenchcoat]

Natural Satellite [ch 13]

An In Stars and Time AU. In ch 13, Loop deflects. Siffrin spirals. Isabeau tries to keep up. You can start from chapter one here.

Isabeau nearly jumps out of his skin. “W-Woah!!! Sif!!!” “Yes?” “You’re—wow, you’re like, really quiet!!” “Yes.” Sif flops down in the grass, patting around vaguely till they find a thick-ish branch. They snap it in half with a startling crack, eye it thoughtfully, and then halve it again before unsheathing their dagger. ...Huh. They’re whittling again, even though they know their work won’t outlast the loop. Which means they want to talk about something. “What’s up, Sif?” “The canopy.” “Annnd…?” Sif’s blade digs into the wood, scraping off a long, curling shaving. “And I thought we should talk about Wish Craft.”

[isat spoilers / 2 hats spoilers / spoilers thru act 6]

Isabeau has, like, at least a million questions.

If Loop—(Sif???) (No, they chose the name Loop; that has to matter)—is really some alternate version of Siffrin, then… what? What? What??? What would that even mean??? And why would they keep it a secret from Sif? What’s the point in keeping secrets from yourself?

Of course Isa isn’t going to rat them out. It’s not his place. And he’s definitely not gonna confront them about their past. What kind of a crab could look at someone who Changed that much and try to talk to the person they used to be? Loop is Loop now. Isabeau is totally cool with that.

…He’s just a little confused about why there are two of them.

Isabeau knows how it feels to Change. But it’s not like he walked out of the House holding hands with the kid he used to be. One person can’t become two people. That’s not how it works. (That’s not how anything works.)

He needs to talk to Loop. Luckily, he’s in the right place. There should be at least a few minutes before Siffrin catches up. Longer, if Sif stops to talk to Mira. It’s not ideal, but it should be enough to get at least a few answers.

“Loop!” he gasps, when he spots them.

“What do you want,” Loop asks sourly.

“N-Nothing!! I’m just a little confused, is all!”

“Okay.”

“And… I guess I was hoping you could help with that?”

Loop gives him a close-eyed smile. “Optimistic!”

“I’m just, um. I… guess I’m having a hard time getting my head around it?”

Loop’s eyes snap open. “Why? Because I don’t hang on your every word? Because I’m not some cute little puppy, like your Siffrin?”

“What? No! Because why are there two of you???”

He watches Loop draw themself up to snap at him and then just—settle back into their seat. “Oh.”

Yeah, oh. “So. You know. Why are there two of you?”

“Does it matter?”

“And how do you look so different? Body Craft is, I mean, it’s pretty advanced, but I don’t think it’s possible to—I mean—I’m pretty sure you’re made of light?”

Loop examines their hands, the white shining from under their nails. “It certainly seems that way, doesn’t it?”

“And—” This one is embarrassing, but he can’t help it. “W-Why wouldn’t you tell me?”

“…Why would I?”

Yeah, Isabeau probably could’ve seen that coming. “Are you seriously not going to answer any of my questions?”

“I’d have thought that would be obvious.” Loop narrows their eyes at him. “Don’t you have any manners? This is Vaugarde. It’s rude to ask someone about who they used to be.”

Wow, they are really not making this easy! “I’m not— I don’t care that you Changed. Or, I mean, it’s great! If you’re happy, I’m happy! I just… I mean… It kinda seems like you aren’t, though?”

Loop’s face hardens. “I don’t want to talk about this with you.”

“Well, who do you wanna talk to?”

“No one! Ever!!! Till the end of time!!!!”

Isabeau groans. “Look, I didn’t wanna play this card, but you just really don’t seem like you’re doing very well…”

“What impressive powers of perception! Your parents must be proud.”

“…and I guess it seems like you’re cool with that, but I’m not, so I think you probably have to talk to someone, so… i-if you really won’t talk to me, then—” He grimaces, bracing for the worst. “I… think I might have to tell Sif.”

To his surprise, Loop just rolls their eyes. “Knock yourself out. I’m sure he’ll be soooo~ surprised.”

“Wh— Huh???”

“Why are you acting like that?” Loop asks grumpily. “You just said it just last loop. That they guessed who I was, and he thought I was probably him.”

“B-But that’s just a theory!”

“Oh, grow up. How long did it take you to clock me? Three loops? Maybe four? He’s been here for hundreds.”

(“Hund—????”)

“They have all the pieces. He’s just deluding himself because he doesn’t like the implication.”

He almost doesn’t want to ask, but… “What implication?”

Loop smiles nastily. “That—”

“Oh, good,” Siffrin says, from immediately behind him. “You’re already here.”

Isabeau nearly jumps out of his skin. “W-Woah!!! Sif!!!”

“Yes?”

“You’re—wow, you’re like, really quiet!!”

“Yes.” Sif flops down in the grass, patting around vaguely till they find a thick-ish branch. They snap it in half with a startling crack, eye it thoughtfully, and then halve it again before unsheathing their dagger.

Huh. They’re whittling again, even though they know their work won’t outlast the loop. Which means they want to talk about something. “What’s up, Sif?”

“The canopy.”

“Annnd…?”

Sif’s blade digs into the wood, scraping off a long, curling shaving. “And I thought we should talk about Wish Craft.”

“It sounds like you should talk about Wish Craft,” Loop sniffs. “You are the only one who knows the rituals.”

Isabeau gives them a look, but doesn’t argue.

“I don’t think that’s right, though,” Sif mutters. “My wish wasn’t even related. And, I mean… do I know the rituals?”

“You knew the right numbers,” Isa points out. “And the chanting and stuff.”

“Right, but it can’t be that simple. If repeating was all it took, then I’d still have that toilet paper.”

Isabeau stares.

Unexpectedly, Loop stares, too. “Come again?”

“The toilet paper,” Sif says again. “Didn’t you see? In the bathroom on the third floor.”

“I don’t watch you pee, stardust. Gross.”

“Wait,” Isabeau interjects, “I’m sorry, I just… You can do Wish Craft by peeing?”

“Piss Craft,” Sif says, apparently on reflex, and then glares. “I mean, no. Obviously not. Will you just listen?”

Isabeau shuts his mouth obligingly. He’s listening.

* * *

You don’t like that Isabeau is talking to Loop now. You can feel that something’s shifted between them, and you don’t like that, either. But at least Isa still mostly does what you tell him.

“I’m saying I didn’t do Wish Craft,” you explain. “I did the wanting, and the repeating, and it didn’t do anything. I didn’t get what I…”

. . . Wait.

What did you repeat, exactly? It definitely wasn’t “toilet paper, toilet paper, toilet paper.” What were your exact words? You asked it to come with you. No. To loop back with you. And you said—

You said you didn’t want to be alone.

(“S-Sif?” Isa says nervously. “You’re, um. You should probably be careful?”

You follow his gaze toward your hands. You’ve reduced the whole branch to sawdust. You flip your knife shut and brush off your knees in disgust.)

You said you didn’t want to be alone. And you’re not alone anymore, are you? Someone’s looping back with you, but it’s not the blinding toilet paper.

“Oh, Stars,” you mumble. “I did it.”

Loop wheezes. “What, really? Piss Craft?”

“No!! Shut up!! Will you both just shut up and listen? I’m saying that I—” Stars, but it hurts to admit. “It’s— Isa, he’s… It was my fault. I’m the reason he remembers.”

Isabeau’s eyes widen. “Wait, but… are you saying, um. D-Does that mean you wished for me?”

Right. Of course he’d ask that. You squeeze your eyes shut, cringing. “Not… exactly?”

“Toilet paper??????”

“I just wanted something I could hold!!” you say defensively. “I was losing my mind!! I was tired and alone and tired of being alone and I couldn’t make anyone touch me and I was just—so blinding tired of dying that I… yes. Yes. Toilet paper.”

For some reason, Isabeau looks even more confused. “W-Wait, what?”

“I said I wanted something I could hold.”

Loop stops laughing for just long enough to choke out, “Wrong sentence, stardust.”

You frown at them, running over your lines in your mind. It all seems pretty self-explanatory. “What?”

“You—” Isabeau’s face is quickly changing color. “You, um. You… wanted us to touch you?”

Oh. Oh, no.

You can read the rest of ch 13 here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53412649/chapters/139473697 Or start from the beginning here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53412649/chapters/135189547

[eyeofthechasm]

Atop the highest peak

[TW mention of death, cremation, self depreciation]

“If one of us bites the dust…what should we do with your body?”

Here again. That question. You’ve heard him ask that question enough times, surely you have an answer by now, right? You’ve already memorized the voice he uses, little breaths he takes between “dust” and “when”, for the love of the universe. Wouldn’t it just be so silly to not have an answer at this point?

But you don’t.

You don’t have an answer. No matter how many times you mull it over during runs, you can’t figure it out.

You suppose you’ve never thought about what would happen because you never imagined being constantly surrounded by five other people. Stars, you figured you’d just collapse and die on the side of the road one day and be found by some poor, unfortunate traveler.

You can’t just…say that, though. They’ll get concerned! For you! As if you’re worth showing concern for, at this point. So you lie. Every time, you say something different or ridiculous. “Throw my body in the ocean”, or “Use me as tree fertilizer.” “Throw my ashes to the stars.” Sometimes, you even steal one of the other’s ideas. But it’s never anything meaningful. You don’t have a belief to fall back on, a tradition you can follow.

You hate it. It makes your skin crawl.

What will they do with your body, you wonder, if you collapse and die but somehow don’t come back? Leave you? You doubt it. Maybe they’ll donate you to science, or ask Siffrin for advice, since he’s the most similar to you out of everyone. Maybe they’ll keep the ashes in your memory.

That’d be nice.

“What about you, Renzo?” Isabeau asks, which startles you from your thoughts. You look up at him, at his eyes. They look so sad.

“…hmmm.” you drum your fingers against the ground, feeling your uneven nails clack against the cold concrete as you mull over the answer you’re giving this time. “I…I dunno. I guess…cremate me, and…do whatever with my ashes.”

They seem surprisingly content with that. A little sad, but…content. Huh. You thought they’d have more questions or concerns.

Maybe you’ll stick with that for now.

Next up is Siffrin. They say their usual. “Burry me atop the highest peak.”

You wonder why that is.