#I'm just regressing and throwing away all of my progress and for what?

[metalheadcowboy]

Me when I have to wake up and go to my silly little work place for the 7th day in a row to work my silly little job to earn silly little money to live my silly little life:

[omegaversetheory]

Question, what would you consider "Non traditional A/B/O" I'm curious cause I feel like it's miss used alot

oh i agreeee.

But before I get into what non-traditional is, I think it would be easier to list what I think traditional is.

One of the main protagonists and/or love interests/part of the coupling is an alpha.

The alpha is male coded (even if they aren't male). The omega is female coded (even if they aren't female).

May have themes of found family/the idea that the individual was not complete until they found x,y,z person (could be in pack setting, via friendship, or via a romantic relationship)

Features some sort of romantic relationship (could be the escalation, de-escalation, termination, re-unification, etc..)

Written from a western cultural perspective (which makes since because I think the majority of the community is north american)

Formulaic.

Escapist and fantastical (what passes for realism here would not pass in other tropes or genres)

Strict binary gender roles/dynamics are heavily binary gender coded. Personally I feel like it gets a little regressive sometimes, which only bothers me when it's touting itself as progressive.

Narrow - in the sense that the story feels very focused on whatever the main storyline is and throws out everything else. Where's the worldbuilding? Where's my immersion?

Quasi-experimental. (I see a lot of different gender and sexual expressions/orientations/etc.. written which is awesome, but it's so common that is not experimental for this genre anymore)

None of these things are bad at all. Much more after the cut.

BUT! if someone was new to the genre and asked me what they should expect I'd hand them this list. I'll always advocate for people to join this community and participate however they want to, but when you've been around for a while you see the same thing time and time again. Non-traditional is hard to write because we are so ingrained in our conventions. But using the framework I've written above here's some ideas of what I think that a non-traditional omegaverse may look like.

No alpha involved. In fact the dynamics of the people in the relationship aren't as important in a traditional omegaverse. (I'd love to see a beta/beta story in which they do not bond over or ever discuss being seen as less desirable than alphas and/or omegas)

Binary gender roles and gender as we understand it via our cultures is not a thing. It's common for dynamics to be seen as secondary genders traditionally, but what if that was just your primary gender. What if there was no primary/secondary - what if it was just one thing.

No male/female coding. In a three part system this doesn't make sense, but to push that even further I'd love to see a concept of it all that's much more fluid and wholly non-binary that what we understand.

No romance. Let's get a mystery, a horror, a comedy, how about coming of age? No romantic interests as the main plot.

Isn't trying to conform to what we understand to be realism. Take it to the point that it operates like high-fantasy with it's own rules and structures and cultural variations.

Deep. Give me the unique history of the area, of the culture. Give me tasty breadcrumbs of culture and lore in throw away comments or off-hand explainations. Write a story fully immersed in the culture. Make it feel "other"'

Truly experimental. Let's go real off the walls. I mean a story that contains 1-6 will already stand out, but surprise me. Let's subvert traditional omegaverse tropes and conventions even further. Maybe omegas aren't desirable. Maybe the tone is futuristic rather than historical. We get so much commentary on the way things are in our real world, let's get some more and let's also hear about the way we want it to be.

I could go on and on. But I won't. It's getting late lol.

But peanut gallery what do you think? Fill my in-box with synopsis of non-traditional omegaverse stories that hit some of these points or just get creative! What do you feel like is alternative/progressive for this genre?

Also, check out my post about traditional-contemporary-modern-postmodern. Where do your favorite stories stand?

[aelin-sgalathynius]

You support Tamlin?

I don't support Tamlin in all the attitudes he's had throughout the series. But I also don't think he deserves all this "hate culture" that most readers throw at him. The Tamlin we see ourselves in the events of ACOTAR is kind, caring (a little overprotective, but I believe it was because of the moment when Feyre, who is a human, was in her turf, and creatures like bogge and attor were after her). But, of course, Tamlin ends up making mistakes in the first book of the series, and ends up making big mistakes in the second book, since, in ACOMAF, we see a Tamlin that gets, in a way, aggressive and controlling, and this ended up causing me a doubt about this character that, at first, gave me such a certain and true image, but later, it seemed to show the real and sudden proposal of the author who wanted to do everything to make Feyre and Rhysand stay together, the that was his plan from the start.

I confess that the Tamlin I saw in ACOMAF took me by surprise. I would constantly talk to some people and see them using Tamlin's overprotectiveness in ACOTAR as a harbinger.  I've seen people say that his charm and affectionate manner was just a ploy to get Feyre to trust him, whether for the sole purpose of breaking the curse or with the intention of making her his, and his alone, until the end ( in a somewhat impulsive and abusive way). These points were pretty valid for considering how Tamlin "regressed" into the figure he turned out to be (this is all just my opinion, guys!), but I've also seen that Sarah J. Maas doesn't give us an insight into the months after Under The Mountain. Basically, she gives us the vision of ACOTAR's Tamlin, who loves Feyre enough to send her back home instead of facing Amarantha, and then she gives ACOMAF's Tamlin, who won't let the feyre out of the house of Spring Court.

However, I also saw that the characters that appeared in ACOMAF also failed in several ways (as did Rhysand, since his appearance in ACOTAR), and they revealed a few points that made me question whether Tamlin, in fact, deserved all the blame.

Although Tamlin made mistakes, the other characters did too, like Rhysand who goes from villain to savior with a somewhat convenient story to explain all his flaws and his behavior in ACOTAR and Under The Mountain (as if Feyre didn't even dance, while drugged, between his legs and he didn't even apologize about it afterwards).

I'm not saying I don't like feysand, on the contrary, I love seeing them as a couple. But come to think of it, as the book is from Feyre's point of view, it's easy to get carried away by her feelings about the whole situation she's been through. But, let's try to do what Feyre didn't, and let's review what Tamlin went through during the events of ACOTAR and ACOMAF. From the start, obviously, Tamlin had put up with Amarantha for fifty years, and while it wasn't as bad as Rhysand or Kallias or Tarquin, he still had to put up with her. Furthermore, he was even forced to watch Amarantha break Feyre piece by piece Under The Mountain, and cannot interfere as Rhysand repeatedly drugs her and parades her like a cheap whore. And finally, he has to see Feyre die. His getting her back after all this, while trying to deal with her own trauma, suddenly makes it seem somewhat understandable why he won't let Feyre out of the Spring Court's house, or let her fight. He's already lost her once, he's afraid of losing her again.

I don't know, it seemed to me that Sarah J. Maas decided to do a "story progress swap" somewhere in the writing process. Tamlin, Lucien, and even Ianthe - the entirety of the Spring Court, so far - are... ridiculed. The people Feyre cared for in ACOTAR, and being cared for in return, suddenly didn't want to know. They close their eyes, ignore painful truths, and why?  So Rhysand can go to Feyre and save her. To me, these facts only reinforced that Sarah J. Maas seemed to decide to send feysand out to the public as a beautiful couple (not that they aren't) more than feylin, and left Tamlin in the background for all of this to happen.

[finsterhund]

Roommate lately has been more mean to me. Idk why.

Sucks because things otherwise have been surprisingly good on my end.

Yesterday he was really aggressively forward to me about how I gained weight and that's going to cause complications with my surgery. As if I don't fucking know this. Hmmm grief and food insecurity. I wonder what that causes? Weight gain! Oh what a fucking shocker. And I've already told him I'm not going to be going back to the gym until after my surgery. So that I don't make it worse. I'm just working out at home in my bedroom. Minimally, but still.

It pisses me off that he says I'm "eating all the time" when I'm having one fucking meal a day still though. bitch literally where? Where is the goddamn food? Like I'm not denying I've gained weight since my best fucking friend died in my goddamn arms but I still am eating one fucking meal a day. Come on. Acting as if it's me eating food as the reason for my health decline and not that grief has made me try to sleep my life away. Goddamn it.

That's what pisses me off. He's diminishing how I'm not doing well. And he's doing it right when I'm starting to get better. Which by the way doesn't work well towards getting better when you have someone doing that.

Idk. As if it's a personal failing on my part that in my severe emotional pain combined with my preexisting disabilities I'm unable to do much of anything except survive.

It's just. Idk.

Like he's able to go to the gym regularly and can afford to have a specific diet and all this and then he treats me like this is something that just as easy for me at this point. When it isn't.

When I admit that for a long time the only thing in my life is eating and sleeping and obsessing over Sly that isn't me admitting some sort of supposed guilt, this is me acknowledging objective facts.

I'm below the poverty line, I'm grieving, my independence was tied to my best friend who is now dead, I haven't been able to see a psychiatrist in person for half a decade because of doctor shortages, I'm waiting more than a year longer than I was told for a surgery that will eliminate some level of physical discomfort in my fucked up body, I am in constant pain because of chronic injury. (I need to stress it NEVER FUCKING GOES AWAY. I can be zonked out on weed gummy and triple times the recommended dose of Aleve (don't do this) and at the very least I can still fucking feel it.) I am psychotic with manic depression and CPTSD and who knows what else because the last time I've seen a psychiatrist was over the phone and they kept throwing around BPD and ASPD and DID like it was nothing and I don't even fucking KNOW you. We only ever physically met ONCE. Nobody fucking knows wtf DID is but that one makes the most sense based on personal understanding of myself and how I don't have a typical form of solid identity like normal fucking people. I've regressed so bad and in the end I was the most reliable with money and always making my share of the rent and shit. And you still got mad at me for buying things that brought me comfort. So I cannot stress this enough. I am holding on. Holding on has been my main priority. And I did it, bitch. I'm still fucking alive. And with all other context that's a feat in and of itself.

It's just hard not to feel like it's me against the world. I know and love and appreciate my friends so much. But damn computer screens and long distance relationships. It's hard.

Hoping this doesn't completely destroy the progress I've been making these past couple weeks.

[theninjasanctuary]

Unsure if actually depressed or just thinking I am because of PMS.

Either way, some suicidal ideation for the first time in a while. Seems like I'm pretending to cope at best. I try to clean, etc., but it's never enough, the place is still a mess. I've wanted to take the rug to be cleaned for months now. OTL

There are annoyances piling up. The gum behind one of my lower wisdom teeth is borderline inflame-y for the third day and the usual chlorhexidine mouth wash hasn't fixed it, worried it'll go septic and I'm going to have to make an appointment so I can get antibiotics. My wrist is still not fucking OK, I've done everything I can for 2 and a half months to make it better and it's just not healing. It felt kind of ok-ish for a couple of days last week, but then random movements like adjusting my hat or mask hurt again. The physio said it might be the weather change (old enough now to start feeling that shit in my bones?). And I've started getting some kind of nerve pain in my left shoulder, so that's getting all the same ointments the wrist's been having, for all the good it'll do.

Work is piling up as well, and I can barely deal. Which leads to a vicious circle of not doing other things I either need to do or enjoy out of guilt over not working, and wasting time on mindless petty procrastination instead because it's not as if I can focus just because I have to. I do the bare minimum at absurd hours of the night and then sleep until it is dark again and avoid looking at my emails because I'm tired of making up excuses.

At least the black trousers that are kind of tight still fit? Wore them to uncle's funeral yesterday. It was ok, as far as funerals go, even though there was that busybody neighbour who always insists on getting some shitty comments in whenever she sees me, on the topic of not having kids. I don't know nor care what her deal is.

I guess what is getting to me is that I don't see how any of this is ever going to get any better? Haven't got a time management skill and don't know how to get one. Can't improve my sleep schedule, because even if I go to bed earlier, I won't fall asleep, and then ruin any chance progress when I am easily up till 8 AM when panic fixing some work shit before the deadline, which seems to happen every week - because I know I can't focus for hours and hours after I wake up, it is either late at night or nothing. Being consumed by worry about work means zero progress or actual regress on any other life goals. Couch potatoing the winter away, already stressed about the insane amount of extra garden maintenance chores spring and summer will bring and how my body will cope. What about fucking driving school? Kitchen reno? I cannot fathom how I'm supposed to make any of it happen, for all the work stress I don't earn nowhere near enough to just throw money at my problems.

[theprodigaldaughtersworld]

Pep Talks

I was a cheerleader in high school so I know what a good pep talk looks and feels like. I've been the recipient of some of my best pep talks lately. Looking into God's word to stay encouraged when everyone is being negative or disapproving. Reminding myself that God loves me just as I am. His redemptive power is enough to make the necessary changes for me to continue to walk in my purpose. I'll never please my parents that ship has sailed. I can't go back and undo being a young mom who chose a paycheck over education because she was too proud to live on government assistance for the years it would have taken to become a lawyer. I can't undo having sex and being pregnant out of wedlock that would change my mother's opinion of who she thought I was. What I can do is move forward and embrace the me that those decisions created. I'm grateful that God loved me enough to keep His arms open for me. I'm grateful that He continues to love me enough to never leave or forsake me. My sins aren't enough for Him to throw me away or condemn me. There is now therefore no condemnation to them who are in Christ. I'm not condemned I'm redeemed. I'm not damaged beyond repair. I'm progressing not regressing. I'm not hopeless I'm hopeful.

I may never stand behind the sacred desk and move a crowd of people with a sermon or sing a song that will bring someone to tears. That doesn't mean I'm not anointed or that I'm without purpose. Good didn't overlook me when He was handing out gifts and talents He has just chosen a different way for me to live the gospel. I want to encourage you if your reading this. Never compare who you are to someone else. God gave you a unique personality and an even more unique ability to live in purpose on purpose. Don't apologize because it's not traditional or looks different than what others think Christianity looks like. Embrace the gift of individuality and live the way God intends you to. Whom the son sets free is free indeed. Live purpose freely not bound. I love you all.

Remain blessed

callednchosen