[Start ID. A digital drawing of Minos Prime from Ultrakill, who's wearing a strapless slit dress and sandals of the same deep purple. He faces towards and slightly to the right of the camera, his head is tilted further right. With one hand he gestures in a vague pointing motion, his arm folded and held close to his body. There is nothing in the background, but bracing himself on one arm, Minos is implied to be leaning against something about the height of a countertop. The background is a blank purplish black, save for three diagonal stripes in the colors of the bisexual flag. End ID]
Shading study that quite literally came to me in a dream two weeks ago, after this post apparently beamed itself into my mind
(also a few edits below the cut! they're very slight but whatever :])
[Start ID. Three different versions of the previous drawing. The first changes the tone of the lighting from blue to pink, and similarly the shading from pink to blue. The second replaces the faint black border with pink, purple and blue, syncing with the stripes in the background. The third combines both these changes. End ID]
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CITR LGBT
I was just trying to find some art for catcher cause I was bored, but I saw the first frequently asked question was about him being ace. I didn't really think they had any good evidence, but I remembered running into some gay catcher questions in past years and was curious what other bits of the acronym people were able to assign him to.
Just that apparently! I mean I only checked the first page of results cause there were seriously too many pages on this, but yeah.
There was one listing evidence of his straight or gayness, but the evidence for both was shockingly bad, and despite their conclusion being straight, I thought they should've collabed with the original Ace headcanon person. Their reasoning for gay was basically 'doesn't like girls' (no evidence given) and their evidence for straight was homophobic (surely you jest) and 'doesn't like guys'.
Anyway, where I'm getting with this is: where are the people who think he's bi? I saw more than 30 on the first page alone for gay and two for ace (after digging), but only one person who was in the ace forum said that he was probably gay/bi. Looking it up didn't even give me results.
I'm just curious cause most of his feelings about relationships are the same as the ones I have (although his are slightly more extreme), and I'm not really into guys. I also don't really think it's strange for a teenager to not have/want to have sex. He seemed open to the possibility in the future, assuming it's with simeone whom he loves and trusts, and who feels the same way about him, so I wasn't really seeing the ace argument.
So I guess to wrap this up, does anyone else think he is? If so, why do you suppose there aren't many people suggesting it? If not, why don't you think he is?
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I love bi people I love bi people so much but I can't see this topic coming up every day in the course of looking at bi blogs. I feel so fucking insane rn and I'm probably being at least partly unreasonable but fuck it's just EVERY DAY now.
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It is a feature and not a bug that nearly everyone in the blank files is queer. i do completely forget that though, until straight ppl mention they may read my book
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as a certified Aromantic Asexual (I should make myself a certificate) I genuinely don't Believe there is systemic oppression that specifically targets Aromantic or Asexual people.
I do however believe that people Cannot be normal about ppl who don't have sex or romantic relationships, and that can Really Impact Aromantic And Asexual People.
Also like. Aros n aces are still. Experiences Other forms of oppression that can interact with the aro and/or ace-ness
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i like that this book doesn't put specific labels on the characters' sexualities. i like that it lets attraction be messy and complicated and a little uncertain and possibly fluid over time. i like that these characters and their experiences feel so real.
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I think that it's really sad how lesbians really have no role models in Hollywood or in the music industry to look up to, it's even worse because like I said before every since the entire gay community was labeled as queer straight people have starting opting into our community. I think that the reason why everything is so fucked up is because straight women started calling themselves bi, and bi women realized this and started calling themselves lesbians to overcompensate for the attraction that straight women in their communities had erased. Which is why so many famous "lesbians" are actually bi (chapel ranch, renee rapp, kehlani) and it doesn't help that they're spreading this harmful rhetoric of being lesbian "now" as if they decided to dedicate the first half of their career to men they dated for years or get pregnant by a man and *then* decide to become a lesbian, and parading these facts about publically only further making it seem like lesbians have to fight our non-existant attraction to men or are only lesbians because we don't want to date men. Pretty much all the famous out gay women are bi. If you had told middle school me that so many women were publically talking about their attraction to other women, I would've been overjoyed, but as I said earlier, not only are most of them bi but they spread harm to lesbians. The last popular lesbian celebrity I know is Haley Kiyoko and people always made fun of her when at the time, and even now she's basically the only out lesbian in the industry. And it's clear that the only reason why she gets made fun of is because she is kind of a GNC lesbian.
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If I had a nickel for every time someone invalidated a part of my identity before coming out to me, I'd have two nickels etc etc
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On your blog you've talked about dealing with chronic as a result from the stress of masking your autism.
It's a bit of a different situation, but my little sister (who we've begun to suspect has adhd) has been experiencing chronic pain in her arms and legs. I may be totally off base, but I was wondering if a similar stess might potentially be a factor in her pain.
If you're willing, would you mind talking about how your pain affected before you found a way to manage it (I tried searching your tumblr, but not much came up, so sorry if I'm asking a question that's already been answered)?
Thanks either way, I love your books. Love is real!
sure buckaroo GOOD QUESTION. i have had chronic pain in some form or another for LONG TIME in a number of STRESS RELATED WAYS. in past it has been cracking teeth from clenching dang jaws while i sleep and things like that, but a few years ago it was FULL ON BODY PAIN AND TIGHTNESS like every muscle was clenching up. went to the doctor over and over all kinds of dang specialists and it was very difficult to figure out what was going on. eventually landed on a sort of nebulous trot of STRESS but i can get more specific.
there are several things about me that you would never know just from looking or even talking to me for long times. i am a bi buckaroo, i am a non-dysphoric trans buckaroo, i am an autistic buckaroo. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE THINGS IS EITHER HIDDEN AUTOMATICALLY OR I AM SUCH AN EXPERT AT HIDING THAT IT IS SECOND NATURE
autism presents its trot in many ways, so my words do not apply to all, but my version is EXTREME ORGANIZATION AND ENDLESS WORK ETHIC. in way of freud (which is a silly way but sometimes good for symbolism talk) i have what you would call an OVERDEVELOPED SUPER EGO which is a double edged sword. i can write 100s of books at an incredible pace, but also feel like my body is constantly collapsing in on itself
this is not really something i consciously think about much, but eventually these health problems started creeping up. it was all from carrying this mystery tension in my body, because while it feels EASY for me to mask i believe all that tension goes somewhere and it stores up and stores up and stores up.
so i think the HEALTHY way that i have found to deal with this (i think of it as releasing the steam valve a bit so the boiler does not break down) is ART. this space where i am allowed to be CHUCK TINGLE and write without obsessing over the spelling or punctuation, or to loudly express my queerness, or explore gender, and to let my neurotypical mask down DIRECTLY RELIEVES my chronic pain because it literally makes my muscles relax.
when i started out this ARTISTIC TROT as chuck i used a LOT of metaphor to keep my privacy, with different words or different versions of people for different things, and buckaroos found this very funny. as a way to express myself artistically i also liked this metaphor trot a lot, but i have also found that the LESS metaphor i paint over my life as chuck, the better it is for my health. if you have noticed, i talk less about some of the parts of my life that were metaphors, or maybe you have seen that my voice has relaxed a bit in interviews, or that i carry myself a little differently over time, this is partially why. (there is another artistic reason that was a planned trot from the beginning and it has to do with my feelings as a young autistic buckaroo of not fitting in on this timeline, but we can dive into that later).
anyway, as PRACTICAL ADVICE i would say that FINDING A SPACE TO EXPRESS YOURSELF WITHOUT FEAR OR MASKING has been the number one trot for me. that can be a pink bag over your head writing hundreds of erotic shorts, or that can be just laying on the ground howling your heart out, or doing whatever stim you need to do.
i will also say that ONCE I REALIZED IT WAS MUSCLE TENSION getting a physical therapist helped a lot. because there are two sides, you have to start releasing steam from the steam valve, but at the same time youve also gotta start HEALING THE DAMAGE. so i think stretching and techniques like that can be very helpful.
hope that helps buckaroo LOVE IS REAL
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thinking about how I've seen OCD get talked about now, but haven't really seen many posts that actually explain what it is. And like, obviously people shouldn't get all their info about mental conditions from posts, but u can't deny that internet communities and stuff play a major role in people recognizing and putting names to their own experiences.
But like since the general public has like absolutely no idea of what OCD actually is (no thanks to popular media), and a lot of things I see talking about intrusive thoughts don't mention OCD (either bc they originated in OCD circles or bc intrusive thoughts aren't Exclusive to OCD or for some other reason), there should prob be more explanation put out on what OCD actually consists of.
Which is kinda hard in some ways, bc there are so many ways OCD can present in terms of what "themes" a person experiences, so someone talking about what their themes are might not ring a bell with someone who experiences different ones. But like, the core thing with OCD isn't the presence of certain themes, it's a specific pattern of spiraling thoughts and reactions.
Like. OCD is a mental condition/illness where people experience stressful, unwanted, repetitive thoughts. These are intrusive thoughts are what make up the "obsessions" part of the disorder. In response to these intrusive thoughts, a lot of people will perform certain actions or think certain things in an attempt to neutralize or disprove the threat they represent. These are the "compulsions" part of the condition.
For a more "traditional" example, someone experiencing intrusive thoughts that they might catch a communicable disease may obsessively wash their hands or google their symptoms to try to lessen the anxiety. While someone who is worried they might hurt someone (even though they very much do not want to hurt someone) may avoid being near sharp objects or may avoid the people they're afraid of hurting.
One of the issues with OCD is that performing the compulsions provides short term relief, but in the long term it only strengthens the stress caused by the intrusive thoughts, thus furthering the thought spiral and actively making it worse, to the point where, depending on your themes, you may be (almost) convinced that your intrusive thoughts represent the truth or the inevitable or something permanent.
Intrusive thought themes cam be literally anything, but some of the common ones are stuff like
Questioning your sexuality, gender, etc (what if I'm actually straight/gay/bi/trans/cis/etc?)
Being worried about losing control and hurting yourself or others physically, sexually, emotionally, basically any way (what if I want to kill someone? What if I'm a pedophile? What if I'm an abuser? What if I want to stab myself? Etc)
Fear of becoming or being sick
Worrying something bad will happen to you or people you care about
Worrying about your spiritual beliefs or lack thereof (what if I'm actually Christian? What if I'm actually atheist? What if i don't believe in the faith i ascribe to? Etc)
Worrying about relationship status (what if I don't actually love them? What if they're not "the one"? What if they're cheating? What if *I'm* cheating? Etc)
What if I'm a bad person?
Fear of losing things
Fear of things not feeling right (this is often be related to other themes via magical thinking. ex: if I don't have my things organized Just Right then something bad will happen)
Fear of unreality
Compulsions vary by theme a lot obviously, but some common ones include
Hand washing
Organizing things until they Feel Right
Checking and double checking and triple checking to make sure you did something correctly
Obsessively reviewing your memories to disprove a thoughtor make sure you don't believe something
Arguing against the thoughts in an attempt to disprove them
Testing your mental reactions to a thought or to certain kinds of content, to show yourself you don't actually believe or feel something
Obsessively googling symptoms, testimonies, things related to your thoughts
Obsessive prayer
Repeating phrases, mantras, affirmations, etc in an attempt to make thoughts go away
Avoiding things and situations that set off your intrusive thoughts
Repeatedly asking for reassurance from others ("I'm not being xyz, right?")
But yeah this obviously isn't exhaustive but, just, if this kind of thing sounds familiar, you should probably do some research on OCD, bc while intrusive thoughts can occur with other conditions, the intrusive thought-compulsion spiral is the core of OCD and isn't really a subaspect of depression/anxiety/ptsd/etc. and the treatment and management of OCD can look different from other stuff, so its a good thing to look into.
(Also it's important to keep in mind, esp if you're someone that doesn't have it, that someone's intrusive thoughts Are Not "secret desires" or "repressed urges" or anything the person even remotely wants to act on. Someone having harm-related intrusive thoughts is not at risk of actually acting on them, no matter how worried they are of doing so.)
Anyway this was a long post and I don't have a neat way to wrap it up and also I accidentally added a poll and now can't get rid of it so here's free poll. I'm running on nyquil and a small amount of straight gin (which works very well at numbing a sore throat) rn gnite
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Propaganda
James Stewart (It's a Wonderful Life, The Philadelphia Story, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington)—the thing about Jimmy Stewart is that for a weird-enough looking guy, he is yet somehow SO hot and SO believable, ALWAYS. He always plays the same person—he's always, well, Jimmy Stewart—yet that person can be a murderer, a dark cynic, a naive idealist, the boy next door or an old man who knows better, and every one of those is hot. I would jump his bones in a heartbeat
Toshiro Mifune (Rashumon, Seven Samurai, Grand Prix, Stray Dog)—i love and respect my boi tab hunter (rest in peace you beautiful, beautiful man ❤️), but after i watched like 12 of his movies in a row on tcm last year, i ALSO love and respect toshiro mifune, son of a literal actual hatamoto’s (a high-ranking samurai) daughter, also very possibly related to the best judokan EVER, AND, he’s the guy who SHOULD have been obi-wan kenobi. the fact that he’s ALSO hot as hell just adds to his appeal.
This is round 4 of the bracket. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage man.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
James Stewart propaganda:
"Ough I saw him first in It's A Wonderful Life, where he is very charming as a suicidal family man being absolutely crushed by capitalism. But then. The Philadelphia Story, in my opinion, should get the same kind of press The Mummy does for being a bisexual dream. Now I'm not really bi (not into women) and it's honestly up for debate whether i'm attracted to men or not, but COME ON!! The movie stars James Stewart as well as Cary Grant and Katharine Hepburn (and Ruth Hussey). Stewart plays a common working man, a journalist, to contrast with Grant's character, who is mega-rich. He is scrappy and hates rich people. Hot! They have a whole scene together where he's super drunk and being really physical with his acting, which I love because he is kinda wet noodle shaped. Hot! He carries Hepburn in his arms while singing Somewhere Over The Rainbow. Hot! He gets punched in the face by Cary Grant. Hot!!! In The Man Who Shot Liberty Valence, we get to see him portray an alternative type of masculinity, opposite John Wayne doing John Wayne. He is even more wet noodle-y, to put emphasis on his incompatibility with the rugged masculinity of the cow-boy, he wears an apron for a lot of the film, again, to blur his masculinity, and he gets shot. Hot! Also he's older here, if that's your thing. Long story short: He's giving librarian chic and The Philadelphia Story made me want to be poly."
“Here he is next to Grant, in what I believe to be a promotional shot for The Philadelphia Story. Please don’t get distracted by Grant (or do, i’m submitting him next).”
“He’s a nice guy and a good guy and deserves all the happiness and joy ever! Classic boy next door/class president kid that everyone loves for real. Stand-up for the Little Guy vibes. With a charming fun side!!”
Toshiro Mifune propaganda:
"In addition, he spoke fluent mandarin and every time he was casted in foreign films, he said his lines in the language of the movie (although they ended up dubbing him. He wasn’t happy about it though).”
Submitted: this gifset
Also submitted: this video (yes, that one)
"Crucial Toshiro Mifune propaganda: THOSE LEGS."
"That is hella muscle. Go watch The Hidden Fortress, aka Star Wars A New Hope. His thighs deserve an award."
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NO OKAY I HAVENT TALKED ABOUT THIS IN A WHILE ANYWHERE but
it honestly bothers me SO FUCKING BAD that the MOMENT i drop he/him pronouns, or stop calling myself a man, people will automatically assume i'm a woman of some form, or, god forbid, a transfem.
like, i am not a man! i am comfortable with irl spaces perceiving me as one because at least theyre not perceiving me as woman but i am a xenogender nonbinary weirdo who presents androgynous (in the sense of classically masculine and simultaneously my personal version of femininity)
and i am NOT a transfem either and i think it's really weird how both cis people AND OTHER NONBINARY PEOPLE will shove me in /w them which is extremely weird and projecting invasiveness onto me ??
NONBINARY ISN'T A THIRD SINGULAR GENDER, THE GENDER SPECTRUM ISN'T A TRINARY, AND NONBINARY ISN'T WOMAN-LITE
i am so sick and goddamn tired of being considered as a woman of woman adjacent because of my aesthetics, favorite color, or even cutesy neopronouns. i don't like saying shit about my agab, i don't even like outright labeling what my fucking gender is, i am fine /w people only knowing my name and pronouns in that regard because IT DOESNT FUCKING MATTER
but it matters again as soon as i stop calling myself he, or a man. because if i don't use he/him pronouns online, if i don't outright label myself as a man, suddenly i MUST be the 'opposite' gender
you are enforcing a binary onto me that i do not fucking subscribe to and the fact that fellow nonbinaries have done this to me as well pisses me off so bad that whenever it happens i see red
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Can you do Smoke and Reptile, sfw, them burying their face in readers boobs, using them as a pillow and how they’d react to reader to reader doing it back to them? You could do somthing suggestive.
I'm curious also, besides Kenshi and Kuai Liang who else are you a fan of?
imma be honest anon, this is such a fire idea. when i was at this a7x concert me and my friend saw a guy with double ds. like. BODACIOUS bro. that was the first thing our eyes went to. he looked like jesus christ brother. he spoke like he had a message from the gods.
anyways. to answer your question. sentimentally i'm very attached to Kitana and Scorpion in general, i played Kitana when mk9 came out (i was 7, my dad let me play mk when i was SEVEN) and my dad played Scorpion and i always got my ass handed to me. but he worked a lot and playing mk9 was the only time we really got together when i was a kid. with mk1, we've been able to play a lot more together and it reminds me of those times, it's really fun. now i win about half the matches we play, but i just don't play Kitana anymore. i really do prefer Kenshi.
I am actually married to Johnny Cage and Kenshi, soooo
Also, to be honest, the first characters to draw me into Mk1 were Smoke & Sub-Zero. Hadn't really been a big Sub-Zero fan beforehand, not of Bi-Han or Kuai Liang. So it was fun having that revelation. And Tomas is just super cute, I actually love that he's Czech. We're not the same, but hey, we're atleast both slavic. I dont know why, I just love finding Slavic characters cause more often then not I end up relating to them.
Sorry for the monologue, anon. Here's your boob request :P
cw: gn reader cause everyone can have boobs brother, bonus character!, proofread
"ɴɪᴄᴇ ᴘɪʟʟᴏᴡꜱ" || ᴛᴏᴍᴀꜱ & ꜱʏᴢᴏᴛʜ
-Tomas Vrbada
Tomas loves nothing more at the end of the day than getting to bury his face in your chest. As long as you two are in private, he'll wiggle his way into you somehow.
Half the time you two have together, he's face down in your chest, it is a regular occurrence and will stay a regular occurrence.
Does he do anything other than that? No. He's planking. He's in love, man, you can't blame him.
So, when you find him laying on the bed that one fateful night, defenseless, you give him the same treatment. You climb onto the bed, and slink your way into his arms.
He reaches out for you absent-mindedly, running his hands through your hair. Then you strike. You plank right into HIS boobs. He hasn't even registered yet. But you understand why he does it to you. Even if you can't breathe, it's somehow euphoric.
Tomas pauses, looks down at you. And his face flushes. You can feel his body temperature rise. He doesn't know how to react, he's been caught in just an inconvenient situaton.
He doesn't complain, though. He's just flustered. Real flustered. He holds you close after he can find his composure, still unsure but grateful of your touch.
-Syzoth
Syzoth almost always makes a dive for your chest when you two are cuddling. He'll be tangled up with you- quite literally, the man really enjoys being as close as possible- and still find a way to bury his head into your chest.
Doesn't matter how much you dodge out of it, he's going to wrap himself around you and find your chest somehow, someway.
But, he thinks he's free of this torment. He gets to lay his head in your chest, and run off freely. He does it when you two nap, when you cuddle, wherever, whenever.
You find him one night, after a long day and seize your chance. And your boyfriends boobies. Without a second chance you throw yourself at Syzoth, aiming directly for his chest.
You can see him realize in that moment what's happening. And you can see the exact look of 'awh fuck', almost as if in slow motion. And when you finally get to lay your head onto his sweet, sweet, pillows, he gives up right then and there.
Syzoth accepts the love, completely. He might act all pouty because you robbed him of his favorite thing to do, but secretly he loves it. You can almost hear him purr.
-Bonus Points! Bi-Han
Bi-Han doesn't really find himself buried in your chest too often. Mainly because he feels like he's controlled for that. He's thought about it, but refuses to do it.
But let's be honest, how can you not shove your face in his tits? They're massive, H cups AT LEAST. So you stalk your boyfriend, until you can find a private moment between you two.
He doesn't know your game, but he does know you've been following him. He's not annoyed, he's simply confused as to why you won't directly approach him.
So, when you ambush him, he's only slightly prepared. You go straight for his boobs. And you land directly in between them. Silence washes over you two.
Bi-Han doesn't understand. Part of him doesn't want to. So he simply wraps his arms gently around your waist and pulls you closer. He kind of thinks you're in need of comfort.
© freyito, 2023 | masterlist | queue | kofi
DO NOT REPOST AS YOUR OWN OR USE FOR AI/AI CHATBOTS
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This is probably super random and weird but I'm ace and after years of lowkey forcing myself to have sex the realisation hit me that I just don't want to have sex. Like ever. Of any kind. I think of never having sex again in mylife and I feel weightless and so relieved I start crying. But I feel so fucking lonely. Everyone is thinking about it all the time my friends talk about it the music I love is about it and I can't relate and I feel so alienated that I'm even doubting my belonging in queer spaces (I'm bi I guess), I feel so blasmphemous to forgo sex in such a radical way right now. I live in a place where ace spaces are non existent. I know this is dramatic phrasing but how can I feel human when I'm not interested in the thing that condenses so much of the shared narrative of what it means to be human? Of what makes life enjoyable, fun? I feel so alone and angry that queer spaces centre sex so fucking much I don't know what to do
listen dog. a lot of people who talk up sex are just bullshitting. sex is cool sex is important sex is fun but more than all that sex is just neutral..its just a thing ppl do sometimes or not. sex negativity has forced the opposing outgrowth of sex positivity but the true state of affairs is sex neutrality. its not that special. its not that evil or that good. its not so charged. its just mundane. take it or leave it. a lot of ppl even allos are only all that sexual a few short years of their life. most couples go months without sex if its long term. sex is cool and all but its not all that. its just a metaphor for power and what is animal in people. people say they care about it but really what they care about is connection or power or sadism/masochism or passion or feeling uninhibited. sex is one way to access that kinda stuff. and theres plenty that is larger than that.
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