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#I'm weak as fuck right now
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I know that suvi wears teal contacts for mostly normal vision correction reasons, but headcanon that her splash in the arith as a kid also damaged her vision and gave her visual snow that she magically corrects for
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shima-draws · 1 year
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My doctor: Hey yeah that's not normal I don't think it's an issue with your hip
Me: Oh?
My doctor: It's an issue with your spine
Me: OH
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#shedinja#now THIS is what i'm talkin' about! i love shedinja. i think it's a very unique pokémon and wonder guard is very *cool* if only it were ever#y'know. relevant. this thing is weak to way too many types for it to be relevant but like it's still cool in concept i think#you kinda can't tell what it is from this angle but that's why you have me here to tag it so you do know what it is#so. bit of a life update for you all. i accidentally deleted some semi-important files i needed for work. like two weeks ago#and i didn't realize i did‚ bc they were inside a folder that i deleted. but i didn't need the files at the time and i hadn't for months#i hadn't used those files since like last year. but now i need them again and i just realized that i deleted them two weeks ago#by accident? and now i need them again. to be able to do my work. so i'm actually queueing this guy and the next guy up#while i'm supposed to be working. as i've just sent an email to my boss being like Haha Hey. Do you Have a Backup of tHese Files……… PLease#and i'm hoping DESPERATELY that she does. if she doesn't i'll have to fucking reverse engineer them which i am not excited for#if it comes to fruition. so i'm just hoping she has a copy of them. feelin like shedinja against a fire-type rn fr i swear#i'll let you all know what she says when i get her response. if i get it before i'm done queuing up shedinja and whismur#spoilers. whismur is next but you could just look up the natdex numbers. and know that whismur is next#also don't tell me to look in the trash. on my computer. i know they're not there. for one i checked and for two they couldn't be there#because i rm -r'd the folder. i didn't just right-click delete that shit. i killed that shit. it's GONE#you might be asking me… why would you do that! and i would say? i did not know these files were in there#you didn't ask for all this information so i'm cutting it off here
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boxwinebaddie · 1 month
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Hi Uncle Neen! HYH! It sucks to see you struggling cuz you are a big inspiration of mine :( but you said you did your makeup the other day. Can we seeeeeeeeee maybe?
d'awwww ksahdlkdss, you are so sweet, nonnie! thank you so so soooo much, baby! xx i really needed this. i hope i heal ( i will...i have to, i am too much of an asshole to let god win, fuck him ) and i hope you heal from whatever harms you as well! you can do it! mWAH!~
-- also brb crying ;-; <3333 whenever y'all tell me i inspire you, it seriously makes me want to cry; you mean SO much to me, so to mean so much to you; it's Everything to me, my love. thank you for believing in me, know i believe infinitely in YOU and will keep fighting the good fight, living authentically and modelling pos behavior on this blog bc i take being a role model very seriously. :')
BUT ANYWAYS! sakhdlasd oh my god aaAaaAAAaa please!!! YOU ARE SO CUTE, THIS IS SO CUTE OF YOU, hELP AAAAA!!!!!! but yes, of course, of course. considering i am super bacteria nina right now and had to resign from my ( admittedly ) trash job and am no longer, at this moment, an education girlie ( besides on here, ofc, educating you on my two gay sons in love ), i can freely exist and post pictures of myself again! thank you for for giving me a safe place to do that. <3
i'll elaborate on what 'safe' means to me down below, but just for context i took this...sigh...last week, when i was told i would 'all better', just trying to feel like myself again after a month of being unmadeup and unfitted and ugly and troll-like and on death fucking row and fucking miserable as hell, i had my new hair appointment lined up, was about ready to take life by the balls again...and that shit BLUE BALLED ME SO HARD AND SAID *ravenstan vc* JK, BABY!
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okay, sorry i have some really bad scarring and wounding up there by my neck so i had to cover her up but...there she is! the she beast!
as for posting pictures of myself just...please...PLEASE BE KIND. and i wish i meant that as a joke, i mean it very, VERY seriously. i am at a point right now, where i look my very fucking worst, i am weaker than i have ever been in my life, there are abrasions all over my body, which per the results of my culture ( i was right...several fucking times and no one would listen to me ) my body is trying to kill me and right now...it is Winning. ( i'm not gonna lose tho, dw, i am a nasty bitch from hell and i refuse to die this ugly, i fucking won't; choke )
tldr; I AM VERY VERY VERY SENSITIVE ABOUT HOW I LOOK. I DO NOT FEEL PRETTY, I AM LIKE ONE BAD COMMENT AWAY FROM TEARING THE SKIN OFF MY FACE AND I AM TELLING YOU GUYS I CANNOT DO THAT, I CANT CREATE ANY TEARING ON MY BODY OR THE BACTERIA WILL TUNNEL AND ITS HARD ENOUGH AS A BITCH WITH DERMATILOMANIA.
PLEASE BE NICE TO ME.
i know we shoot the shit on here and are funny and clown eachother, you guys are my family; it's what families do, but my boundary is that you can say i am pretty and be objectively kind or Please do not send me anything At ALL about how i look; i CANNOT take it rn. i know were just joking, but please, please, PLEASE Do NOT compare me to any ugly creatures, make me feel weird about any part of my face, tell me i look blurry, say anything is too big or too small…
please don’t meme on me abt my appearance...Ever.
it’s a very sensitive spot for me and makes me v anxious.
all this to say, i love you; thank you for being my home.
HYH.
-uncle nina, single ravesey mother and human petri dish
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shadystranger · 2 months
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kills me michael escapes the boiler room and dean amidst his panic sees sam and goes i told you! and laments how could he let sam talk him out of it why would he let sam sway him (bc he's weak) and sam looks at him teary-eyed like he just didn't wanna lose dean ...
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morsobaby · 9 months
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(Says this really close to the mic)
Women's hands.
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catgirljaneway · 8 months
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everytime i see something about tuvix i am filled with inhumane rage ngl
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tenspontaneite · 1 year
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Bruh people aren't fucking lying about COVID fatigue goddamn
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talentforlying · 8 months
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constantine: ... y'know... you're scarier than him. he was just a mopey old goth havin' a mid-century crisis — but you...? you smile. nothin' more dangerous than a bloke who thinks he's bein' nice while he waves you off to die. what d'you say to that, eh?
DID I NOT SAY THERE WAS PUNK-GOTH RIVALRY WITH DREAM AT SOME POINT!!! I FEEL SO VINDICATED!!!!
also: "you smile" being the reason that john is more scared of daniel dream than he was of morpheus is a fucking knife to the gut when you remember tommy willowtree saying "john? he had your laugh" about the tulpa constantine that tortured him. man is still reeling from literally being his own worst enemy in so many ways.
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savage-rhi · 1 day
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Fuchsia 💀💙
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atoltia · 2 days
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been thinking about this since last night and just - i really dislike it when a competent female main character is levelled to incompetency to push the story forward. i hate it when she has to become a damsel in distress without so much as a good reason for it just so she could be saved by her love interest.
if she needs to be saved or aided by her male LI, there are so many other ways to do it that doesn't completely disregard the intelligence, the experience, and the skill the character has.
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stillfruit · 7 days
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i love not knowing if i'll ever be healthy again i love all of the time i've used to move my body become nothing i love spending my adulthood wasting away year after year for various reasons baby!
#i know i'm being dramatic and privileged etc etc right now but i hate living like this#i probably had covid in the beginning of august and since then my heart and lungs have just been fucked#so now i'm probably looking at at least 2 years of long covid and maybe permanent neurological damage#could i be lucky and get better in few more months? maybe. do i believe that will happen? no. optimistically maybe next summer id be better#my symptoms are not that bad considering what i know other people have suffered but at the same time that makes it feel not real#otherwise i'm pretty much fine except i feel like fainting alot after standing up or excerting myself and anything beyond walking#spikes my hr to 160 and right now even laying down my hr is around 80. this comes with the associated shortness of breath etc#what fucks me up about this is that my normal hr is low with my rhr being under 50bpm and i'm physically active#so basically i've went from regular running and half marathons being no issue to not being able to jog 1km at the slowest pace possible#without spiking my hr to zone 4#so now with the recovery time of this being however long if properly ever i'll have to basically start all over again with everything#i biked to the grocery store yesterday and that took me out for the rest of the day because my heart rate just didn't go down afterwards#outwards i look fine and i wouldn't be as affected if sports and moving wasn't a part of my life and relationships but it is#i've read studies about recovery times and a lot of them don't feel applicable because the test groups are either very different from me#based on the baseline health info such as activity levels or they're elite atheletes which i am not#some have given me hope that keeping my hr under like 130 by doing activities like walking until maybe someday things get better works#but who knows and even if it does this will be yet another thing that takes the littlest bits of muscle tissue i have on me away once again#because besides deconditioning muscle loss is yet another symptom. so i will be even weaker than i am right now#i don't know how much of what i'm experiencing in terms of mental effects is from anxiety over my physical health and how much is brainfog#but we'll see i'll just have to start walking a lot every day and keep up with simple and slow strenght training so i'll want to die less#i don't think my family will ever properly understand because almost all of them are athletes and the one who isn't never does any excercis#so either i just look like i'm weak but i was always weak so it's not a big deal or my experience isn't really that important#this is so so so pathetic both my reaction and the issue but it's difficult to not feel this way especially with the uncertainty#shit talking
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il-predestinato · 1 year
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#so i'm the first one to shit on ferrari usually#but i'm actually quite sick of this narrative that today's debacle from charles should be blamed on ferrari#yes they should develop a faster car and not an understeer garbage#yes they should develop a car that suits their number one driver#yes their strategy is incompetent 95% of the time#yes it's very *odd* how things only break on charles' side of the garage and not the bank's side#BUT come on#today's debacle is firmly on charles' shoulder for me#let's be real he has now shown on THREE DIFFERENT TRACKS on THREE DIFFERENT RACE WEEKENDS that in mixed wet/dry conditions...#he's just a fucking mess#yeah yeah yeah his particular setup is unfavourable and the car is too understeer and the front won't turn in the mixed conditions blah bla#but this is ON CHARLES#HE DID NOT ADAPT to these problems#he's fighting the car and has zero confidence and his driving is frankly abominable in these conditions#his DRIVING is the problem and so he needs to fix himself#and yes ferrari has a laundry list of things to fix but let's not pretend that charles hasn't shown a deficiency or weakness today#i am very disappointed in him because i KNOW he can be adaptable and i KNOW he is capable of much better#so ADAPT and figure it out#and don't fucking do the same overtaking attempt that doesn't work over and over again when you're fighting your own car#charles is absolutely right: HE is a large part of the problem today#at least he is honest about this and i know he has the talent to overcome this#elle.txt#austrian gp 2023#f1
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complicit-rot · 3 months
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i haven't been this social & talkative in Years someone drag me out back
#rambling to myself in the tags just go ahead n pass by 🫡#u've been warned#i can feel the burnout(?) creeping up on me & its been. two days.#at least my friend is reassured i'm still in their life every few months 👍#even if i end up hating being dragged out places i know a little relief feels like a lot to other ppl#but i also just. hate being involved at all. esp if its pity but also when they genuinely want to talk with me. which sucks!#i hate thinking like that. however it just feels like the most logical path sometimes yk? after (gestures vaguely) everything?#i'm childishly obsessed with the aspect of destruction. me or them carrying it out it doesn't matter#any sort of socializing feels like grinding stone together whether or not their intentions seem as pure as possible#it feels like my socializing button is broken and my battery is locked at 2% 24/7#its not that i actively try to keep myself locked in self serving cycles to stay pitiful lord knows i hate being pathetic#i despise being miserable. it may not be Everything i know. it may be comfortable or familiar or whatever edgy shit#but it takes so much energy to have any emotion. i feel like i wrung myself dry in elementary school#ultimately i know i'm capable of Having Emotions. they're just all buried beneath 78 layers of static that don't seem to be there for other#i try to be social. even when i know Deep down i like them i end up hating every interaction. no matter how smooth or funny or whatever#i seem to have this blanket that makes everything heavier on me. i don't like being weighed down but sometimes i have to comply else#i know i'll just fucking crash out for the next however many years & end up being more hurt than i began with#<- metaphor doesn't make sense bc i ditched it half way thru but you get the point#be social to the complete detriment to my health & appease others or hurt other ppl (something i don't like doing bc i know how it feels) &#end up ''''saving'''' myself (trapping myself further. lose/lose). i wish i was completely exempt to people paying attention to me#i Hate wallowing in this fucking pity. this whole woe is me evvybody huwt me so now i feel nudding :( schtick makes me feel so weak#i like feeling strong by socializing. sometimes i get this litttlee inkling of maybe i should try & put myself out there More but it always#comes with the same results. one of these days surely it'll change (<- bearer of the curse) (<- but still has hope despite denying it)#yes i'm in therapy yes i'm working on my social capacity slowly instead of getting my boundaries ran over at top notch speed by my abusers#sometimes i need to say the self pitying shit out loud to knock me to my senses & be like 'if a friend said this i'd criticize them'#'if anybody else thought that you'd cringe so hard and be filled with That Specific Misery you feel & hate so much' ohhh right. my bad
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vilevampire · 4 months
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I loaf technology
#context: I've been learning japanese for the past. um#*checks date* 2 months or so.. well. there was also one time I started studying then gave up in 1-2 months but I'm not counting that#and it's been coming along but by far my biggest weakness is my lack of vocabulary#I don't find the grammar super difficult but since I only know 800-900 words#(for comparison the average native speaker knows about 20k words)#most of the time that I read/listen to something and don't understand shit it's bc there's too many words that I don't know#I learn 20 new words a day thru flashcards + occasionally pick up some words here and there subconsciously just from watching stuff in jp#(that's also how/why I started watching inazuma eleven recently. and now I know too many fucking soccer terms in japanese)#but still I'm an impatient boy so I was like ok. what if I try to read stuff to pick up more vocabulary#usually this would be near impossible (or rather incredibly tedious) because I don't know enough words to really read anything#and I'd spend forever just looking up every single word that I don't know right#well thanks to the power of technology and a good pop-up dictionary extension I don't have to worry about that#and today I managed to install the extension on my phone too (I didn't know it was possible or else I would've done it sooner)#so now I can read. japanese inazuma eleven fanfic from my phone. lol#it'll still be pretty annoying of course since I'll have to look up MOST words anyway#but at least the process will have been simplified by a lot#anyway. that's why I loaf technology#lucasings
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running-in-the-dark · 9 months
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