#IM SO SCARED RIGHT NOW WHAT
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GORL HELP I LOOKED UP JERMA FOR SOMETHING AND LOOK WHATS THE FIRST IMAGE

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genuinely is my brain erasing itself or is google/tumblr censoring that post about notre dame and old growth forests.
#i know we joke about tumblr's (lack of) search function#but at some point this is surely (less) passive (more) aggressive#(particularly against people with memory issues...is this. is this gaslighting.#am i. am i being GASLIGHTED. by a social media platform who isn't even my PARENT???)#that post is ingrained in my memory but google image is flirting and fwirling its fan 'haha! you're so cute! and Imagining Things. Dear :-)#i have Looked okay! i've looked! and i've looked for a SEVERAL DOZEN POSTS before this after talking To People...and behold!#...this last year or two i *genuinely* can't find posts 4 out of 5 times.#what the COOL GELITAN FUCK is going on#geletan#gel#GELTAIN#GELA--im so scared right now#so tired#GELITAN#what the chilled gelitan fuck is going on#update: i Am being gaslit just not about the spelling of gelly-thing#i'm both stupid AND being gaslit. these things! can! coexist! *sad clapping*
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The tac net crash chapter is one of my favorites so far~
Ah and. Guess what. I just discovered that including this post, I made 50 pieces of fanart for Mistakes on mistakes until.. I’m so sane and normal about this story can you tell👍

#maccadam#transformers#fic fanart#momu fanart#jazz#prowl#jazzprowl#considering the speed and the amount of fanart#….yeah I can see why tumblr thought I was a bot lmao#also#I mostly read during night and then drawing from memory during day so uhhhhh the accuracy is questionable haha#mainly I feel like half of the time I don’t know how tf Jazz looks. The guy switching between his looks so often jdjfjfj#IM. SO GLAD THEY RESOLVED THEIR DRAMA EHEHBJGJ#The scene in medbay was so damn cute#oh my goddddd#the scene of the tac net crash#muah#loved it~#you know the thing is - I'm a biiiig fan of mutual feelings and actions#the scene of the kiss was absolutely great but it was a bit one sided#Jazz cared about Prowl but Prowl was far more concerned about information safety and strategy and stuff#but this?? mmmm~ Them caring for each other#Prowl using his last moments of consciousness to ask Jazz if he is mad at him#Prowl actually deeply caring of what Jazz thinks about him now when he knows Prowl killed his friends#i don't know how to explain#kisses are great but this (points) this is my favorite five star meal right here#also there is something so funny about Prowl slowly discovering fow fucked up Jazz is and just accepting it#but being so scared when Jazz discover how fucked up he is. Only for Jazz to be like “boo I knew about your fuckedupness from the start”
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I want to scream and cry (istg who tf am i lying to, i am already crying)
To every non-ukrainian that reads my tumblr — if Ukraine is going to be given to russia, I will die. For being openly pro-Ukrainian or openly queer — one of those two, definitely. It is, like, a fact. And the possibility of that is way higher then the possibility of me dying right now from a missile or a drone (even though there's an air raid right now, yeah). Fucking crazy, but that's the reality.
Don't want to be spreading defeatism, but the things that happened in the White House today very clearly show that the US is siding with russia.
I believe in our military. They are doing absolutely unbelievable things. They are probably the only reason why I haven't given up on my life yet.
But oh my fucking god, it is so obvious that the US is trying to sell us to russia. Honestly, it is fucking unbelievable. After threatening to sanction the hell out of us in the 90s in order to make us give up our nukes and destroy missiles and military aircrafts, they failed to react when russia broke the Budapest memorandum and attacked us in 2014. They did fucking nothing. And now they are actively betraying Ukraine (sorry, I can't call it otherwise). I hate trump and every person that voted for him. I wish them to spend the next 11 years like ukrainians — actively suffering and with everyone telling them to shut up and die already.
I genuinely don't know what else to say. Support Ukraine, please. If you are not from the US — look up the info about pro-Ukraine rallies in your country. We need the support of other countries. At this point I am literally begging everyone who can read this — push your government to help us. It is crucial right now.
If you are from the US — honestly, i don't know what to tell you. Either hire a hitman who can do their job or riot and overthrow him. Yeah.
Ah, also, yeah, never fucking ever give up your nukes 🙂
#ukraine#ukraine russia war#war#at this point i have come back to my january 22 state when i was considering killing myself if the full-scaled war starts#rn my mental health has come to the point when every damn thing that comes out of trump's mouth makes me consider jumping out of the window#yeah i am really close to ending it all right now i am not joking#but yeah i believe in armed forces of ukraine#im tired angry and scared#honestly what the fuck i should be worried about finishing school rn not about how i will die if usa sells us to russia#this is so fucked up
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find another role, carry on the show
#EDIT IT DIDNT SAVE MY TAGS. hey so this post got a thousand notes huh. interesting. surely nothing will change#i'll leave all the old tags. for my thought process. and its kinda funny#take a bow stupid idiot (throws a tomato at them)#in stars and time#isat#siffrin#siffrin no middle names no last name ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧#... or is it. Smiles#i'd like to draw mira for her birthday but um (hasnt open artfight website in a few days) im scared.#also i have NICE ASKS TO ANSWER.... But im scared. give me a minute#Uawaaaaagh i drew this bc i was trying to animate a little bit but it just . Didnt look good. im not good ag 2d animation#tch. ill keep trying cause there ar e way too many songs that and now about isat because i have brain worms. i need amvs.#IM SCARED TO POST THINGS THAT ARE SPOILERY BECAUSE I WANT MY FRIENDS TO PLAY ISAT. BUT.#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#sasasap#sasasa:p#WHAT IS THE PROLOGUES TAG.#tshirt that says 'i <3 killing the image in the mirror and taking its place' on the fromt#and a list of megan thee stallions tour dates on the back. お金稼ぐ俺らはスター#Im kind of tempted to edit this to be the versiom with the eyes. or maybe twt can have that. or. well#all of my friends are on twt (trombone slide sfx) so maybe thats where i should worry about spoilers.#ill see if i want to slap an eyepatch on them in the morning#Im one of those people who was like idgaf about twohats (lets it simmer for a week) Oh my god. Oh my god. Ohmy god#EDIT. i swapped it out for the Eyes version it should be fine as long as its tagged formspoilers right...#ill post eyepatch vers on twt partly bc spoilers but also ppl over there can be .. annoying ..... ....#i fear i would get 800 You Forgot The Eyepatch replies. PLEASE JUST SEE MY VISION.#[BANGING MY HANDS ON THE GLASS] HIS HAND. LIKE IN THE PROLOGUE. WHEN THEYE. HANDS. HELD[EXPLOSION
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i'm ready to try
#This drawing is kind of personal to me#I recently graduated (CUM LAUDE WOOOO!!!!) and its like. not to get depressing#but when i was younger i was never sure whether i would make it to this point#When i was going through what i consider to still be like. the worst time of my entire life#This fictional character was there for me and she was something for me to latch onto and cope with#eGem helped me a lot with being able to process my emotions at the time but also helped me to reflect on myself#which i think is a big reason as to why I'm really happy with where i am with myself right now#I'm going off to uni next school year to study astronomy!!! which!!!#Im also doing because of eGem!!! She ignited this kind of childlike wonder for space for me#I love doing math and physics and whilst Im still a bit scared because. honestly i don't know whether this is what i want to do with my lif#I think i'll be okay either way#either way i wanted to draw egem again even if i haven't done so in a while because its like#i think i wouldnt be who i am without her. i think i'd be a lot worse off#so like. thank you empires smp thank you geminitay thank you egem This drawing is me expressing my gratitude#AND THANK YOU AUTISM!#empires smp#empires smp s1#empiresblr#esmp#geminitay#art#fanart#alice.art#mcyt#mcytblr#song is andromeda by weyes blood... obv.. you guys know me by now :oP
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chapter cards for thirteen: november - april






read on ao3
#I did want to post this bc it's been in my drafts for a while and I do like these#it's fun seeing them all together like this#like my metamorphosis covers master post that was so fun#it does feel a little bit like. I dont know.#meta or ironic or something#that I had to stick a hiatus right down the middle of the chapters#and right at the moment where [redacted] happened#it feels a little bit poetic for there to be a chasm there#watch me like get really inspired next week and write all of may and then none of this means anything lol#who knows#but anyway I like these#april in particular feels so fun and spooky#I love emilie agreste she scares me#autumn asukiess I know you now what im talking about#ml#miraculous ladybug#miraculous#my art#adrien agreste#emilie agreste#ml fic#thirteen
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i was born today
#genuinely idk what to think right now#its just a number and im not sad im getting old#im sad that i feel like i wasted my 20s being too sad and too scared doing anything and im still scared and sad#and i thought i would be dead sooner lmao#so uh... yea#if u wanna give me a gift uhh buy from my etsy! or donate on my kofi or buy off my itchio idk#money is kind of the best gift for me right now#but never feel obligated to do so#a simple happy birthday is enough for me :)
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the qiong ding peak disciples 100% have petty beef with lbh for stealing their favourite didi lmao
they're not gonna Actually beat him up (without Reason) but they're very emphatic about how thoroughly they WILL if lbh messes with sy. it's like a shovel talk that never ends
sy isn't actually completely oblivious to whats going on but he doesn't get why they're like this and he thinks theyre being fucking stupid (and he trusts them to not actually bully binghe) so he's elected to ignore their antics entirely
#arts#mottau#next chapter almost done so im letting these loose now#hou jingxing is standing on the Box of Dramatic Height Effect in the first image. she is actually shorter than lbh#bai yunqi does not get in on their antics but he is Watching lbh to make sure he's not Problem#lbh is not scared of these bitches he WILL fight for the right to hang out with sy if he has to#most of this (particularly for hou jingxing + li yanying) is just childish jealousy over how much sy obviously likes spending time with lbh#part of it is that having an interested alpha who they don't know hovering around the omega of their group#does clock as a Potential Threat on a purely instinctual level#but there is also a Not Insignificant portion of this (esp for bai yunqi)#which is that they met sy when he couldnt talk or walk on his own and clung to yqy like his life depended on it#its sort of left an impression on them! esp bc nowadays its very clear he wasn't like that because thats normal for him/his preference/etc#the younger two especially probably wouldnt even be able to put into words that its something that worries them but it does all the same#lbh on the other hand only met sy after he was already growing MUCH more independent#he's never known sy as anything other than how he is now. what he DOES know is that sy was the first person who ever REALLY helped him here#so he's never thought of sy as someone who needs to be sheltered or protected even though sy is a few years younger than him#and that's a HUGE part of why sy spends so much time with him
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im way too scared to say this on main but icl i love lloyrumi n' i love ur lloyrumi art ... can u draw them more for me ... maybe dr harumi meeting sora and jordana like 'damn lloyd they js like us fr fr ???'
i love when the relationship dynamic is "kiss marry kill? all of the above"
#llorumi#wolfcat shipping#raspberryshipping#ninjago#:3#parcaeive#ty for the ask!!! :3#ok im too lazy to tag the individual characters right now maybe later#also anon never be afraid to be a llorumi shipper...never be afraid to be real af#thwres Six actie llorumi shippers here and they would fight for u fr...#also sorry for taking about Checks time NINE THOUSAND YEARS to respond#WAIT im not forcing u to go to main Just so we r on the samr page but i think you should Not be scared#But fr dont be afraid to be a llorumi shipper we are one in the same... two peas in a pod..#like yeah ig majority of the fandom hates it so what#i like it and u like it and we're grooving so we should just have fun!!!!#also dont mind the ugly ass jordana idk how to draw her hair yet#shes my next kai#ninjago spoilers#<- only implied but wtv
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[NINJAGO LEAKS DR S3P2, talking about jay/rogue]
jay rogue walker is better than me because if i lost my entire identity and memory and didnt even know if my name was actually real and got for years manipulated and lied to and the people who got me kicked out and kept switching back and forth from being seemingly nice to hating me for every little thing then commissioned me a job, then wanted me to risk my literal soul which is fucked up already from the other guy to save people we werent there for just to not save anyone but the targets anyway, and then go do that again??? and then they get mad at me for not wanting to risk my life for something i never wanted to be a part of?????? yeah id murder them all honestly
#ninjago leaks#ninjago spoilers#ninjago dr s3p2#WHY ARE THE NINJA ACTING LIKE HIS SOUL BEING SHATTERED AND THE MEMORY LOSS ARE AN INCONVENIENCE TO THEM AND LIKE JAY ISNT A LITERAL STRANGER#TO THEM NOW#jay had every fucking right to walk away especially after everyone treated him like shit#is he mean and slightly cruel and very inept at social interaction? yeah in his words#he still did for arin in maybe a week what the entire team couldn't do for literal years#like theyre pissing me off so badly theyre giving him no fucking grace#its the exact conflict i predicted that the ninja are doing the exact same thing admin and ras did to him And Jay Calls It Out#like dont get me wrong i love it as a writing choice but im gonna be fucking pissed if the writers make jay to be in the wrong#THEYRE FALLING FOR THE FACADE JAYS FUCKING UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THE PEOPLE AND THE TOUCHING AND FUCKING SCARED OF DYING#HES NOT THE JAY THAT SURVIVED DAYS SLASH WEEKS OF TORTURE LOST EVERYONE TWICE AND SINGLEHANDEDLY SAVED THE WORLD TWICE#and what pisses me off is that its literally the season/part focused on taking accountability for shit like that but naur lets all treat jay#like shit because he magically didnt turn his memory button back on the moment he laid eyes on them#AFTER LITERAL YEARS OF TRYING TO LIVE HIS LIFE#i need episodes 19 and 20 NOE#NOW#*#so much empathy and grace has been given to Literally Every Character this season except for jay BY THE CHARACTERS
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i have this recurring nightmare where i am transported back to my body pre-transition and for a brief moment i'm like oh cool boobs and then the horror sets in as i realize everything feels wrong and bad and i don't look like myself and it's going to take me years to transition to looking like myself again (myself as in the way i look now in real life) and i have a complete mental breakdown. and then i wake up and all i feel is relief. so i'm pretty sure transitioning was the best mental health decision i ever made 👍🏼
#ive been on t for like 8 years now and got top surgery 8 years ago too#sometimes i think huh what if and then i have this nightmare and im reminded that i definitely made the right choice#its fun that my brain likes to scare me by reminding me what debilitating dysphoria feels like via nightmares every once in a while#as though my brain is like hey remember how truly horrifying and terrible that felt? well you dont feel that way anymore so be grateful
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i suddenly wanted to draw that one oc story with the spider guy again so here is him and his itty bitty ant roommate he does develop a one-sided beef with his roommate (its gets insane) and its the funniest thing ever because he's just beefing with a little critter
#fun fact i dont know what ants look like#and i dont want to look them up#because im scared#so i looked up 'cute ant'#and then i went based on those#so i apologize if the design is not very Ant-Like#i cannot look at bugs waah waaaaaah#oc#oc art#undecided what gender the ant is right now#still thinking about it
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WHAT AM I MEANT TO SAY WHEN PEOPLE ASK ABOUT MY HOBBIES LIKE OH. IM VERY OBSESSED WITH AN IMPROV GROUP FROM LONDON. YEAH WHEN I THINK ABOUT THEM I SMILE LIKE A MANIAC AND I’VE CRIED BECAUSE THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME MULTIPLE TIMES. WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?
#like what am I meant to say when people ask me what I’ve been up to!??!! 😭😭😭 “been making lots of gay fan edits of aubergine farmers”#help#/lh#shoot from the hip#all caps#I love fandom being what I do for fun don’t get me wrong I love it SO MUCH#but like#People I know irl can be very judgemental and I’m not used to sharing it with people yk#But it’s like my only obsession right now and people I know irl are confused as to why I seemingly don’t have an obsession rn 😭😭#Because I’m scared lol#Like there’s nothing weird about it really#but idk#Anyway we stay silly :3#I’ve shared it with people who don’t think it’s weird/already knew im weird#BUT IM TALKING ABOUT IT MORE AND ITS GOOD#anyway sorry for rambling in the tags#This is a silly /lh post lol (/gen)
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yeah that's uhh that's definitely something




#'david jenkins is a neil gaiman fan' U SHUT UP!!! IM SO FUCKING SCARED RIGHT NOW U SHUT UP?!!!#the difference in crowley's and ed's expression tho. one is in complete panic and agony and the other is just numb#says a lot if u ask me#something something the demon (or demon coded) character shots at the angel (coded) character who has complete trust in them#something something i dont even know what this means#good omens#good omens s2#azicrow#crowley#aziraphale#ofmd#our flags mean death#gentlebeard#stede bonnet#edward teach
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I made a thing 😬
I am. Not scared/lie
Also ik some of this shit might be confusing ppl can like ask for clarification if they need it
#content smp#yall im so scared#what if i just die#also yes i know its premiering right now#and has been for like 15 minutes#i dont have time to watch it rn
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