Sometimes I feel like "lonely" isn't enough to describe how I feel. It's an ache that echos in everything I do. I don't personally know anyone else like me. I've never met another butch irl. I've never met a femme irl. (And I mean Femme btw. Not just a feminine queer person). I don't personally know any other lesbians. Dating is hard. I have so many queer friends that I love so much but somehow I still feel alone. Even though there's a lot of experiences we share and feelings about gender and presentation or whatever. I just feel alone. The few Sapphics I see on dating apps either don't want someone like me (i.e. butch) or stop replying after a few days. Sometimes I just stare at the ceiling and hurt. Maybe I need to go back to therapy (probably do tbh) but like. At the risk of sounding like a melodramatic dork... I feel like no one understands.
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14 year old me who hated the concept of marriage and relationships and vowed to be single forever would be so mad if she could see me now at 17 all cozy in bed with my cat smiling and blushing thinking about my gf while waiting for her to get out of the shower so we can call and watch the owl house together
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Suddenly remembered how my ex would get so mad if I ever said “anyways” would literally cut me off to correct me and rant about how dumb it is that people say anyways instead of anyway.
Anyways, I love my current girlfriend and she only cuts me off to tell me how much she loves me.
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Funny how I haven't really had any heart palpitations or anxiety attacks since breaking up with my ex
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"oh, what are you going to do to me, detective~💋"
you know these two like to play it risky👀
(I revamped this artwork for a secret project, so that's why you're seeing it again lol)
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About Noé's latest neurodivergent adventures (chapter 61.5 and 62)
(things I found relatable)
1. PUTTING UR HAND UP BC U CANT FIGURE OUT WHEN TO SPEAK. EVERYONE THINKS UR WEIRD FOR IT BUT ITS POLITE AND LIFE IS FUCKING HARD
2. Struggling to follow conversation, and seeing clearer ways of communication that no one else can and getting frustrated that the neurotypicals are so obviously communicating poorly
3. Vanitas designated translator
4. Being quite blind to politics (when it comes to discrimination against himself as a vampire [and his PRIVILEGES as a vampire] and in this case against others like dhams) bc he works individual by individual instead of by social categories
5. Last of all it hurts to see the other characters calling him ignorant and an idiot all the time bc Ive been there. He's booksmart, he's intelligent, just not socially, but here is everyone writing him off as dumb just bc he's different.
Its not like he's ignorant on purpose. Of course it's important to know this shit he's learning now, and it can be done, but it's a lot harder when ur autistic and, as Vanitas said, when u grow up so isolated. Learning is a neverending process and Noé is very clearly learning and just bc he works differently like putting his hand up to speak or interpreting the world differently doesn't mean he's stupid
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