#KENA: Grumpy

[dinitian]

gelungan emosi di tiga satu mei

ya Allah udah delapan bulan. dua semester. sebuah keputusan yang sebenarnya bukan tidak dipikirkan, namun lebih dilakukan karena untuk dicoba. tidak ada dalam rencana. diluar perkiraan bmkg, aslik. ternyata menjadi sisipan bagian hidup yang bermakna.

bulan mei ini terasa penuh sepenuh penuhnya. tidak hanya jadwal rangkaian kuliah saja, namun juga hal laain yang tidak bisa ditunda pula. liburan misalnya. karena memang tanggal merah bulan ini sungguh merona. banyak bet cuy, sayang kan kalau diskip aja.

diawali dengan studi wisata ke malang. pulang kampung ceritanya, gapapa. kasihan teman² se Indonesia di Jogja yang belum pernah ke malang. anggap aja nganterin mereka. seru. kalian rek yang bikin seru 🥹

lanjut penarikan PPL II di sekolah. bye bye. sedih tapi seneng tapi ya gitu. alhamdulillah selesai. lanjut kuliah offline cuman lima hari 😭. terus dadakan kek tahu bulat siap² take video untuk UKin a.k.a. ujian nasionalnya kami para mahasiswa PPG Prajab. tentu sangat tidak bisa dilupakan, aku giliran pertama dari kita berempatbelas untuk maju ke medan perang. lancar? i hope so 😭 bismillah insyaAllah aman. dipenghujung pekan aku diselamatkan oleh saudariku the one and only from Mojosari 🤣 kita healing ke Kaliurang atas dan bablas ke Solo. that was a really nice 24 hours escape! thank you so much.

huru hara UKin masih belum selesai dilanjutkan dengan tagihan LMS a.k.a. tugas/paper kami yang harus diselesaikan semuanya dan harus sudah beres maksimal tanggal dua delapan. tidak hanya admin jurusan yang menagih bak debt collector masih ditambah admin DPPK dan dosen pula.

tibalah pada long weekend bertabur tanggal merah. sebuah dilema yang pada akhirnya tidak kusesalkan karena maksa melakukan keduanya. aku sok ide datang ke teman kelompok ku untuk diskusi Gelar Karya. aku jujur pada mereka untuk absen saat persiapan pameran. tetapi banyak ide dan bahan seadanya yang kupunya, kuberikan dan kutitipkan. while having guilt for not being present to help them, i went to go on a long planned trip with my sister and the gank.

resikonya, di bandara ngerjain UAS. turun pesawat nunggu bagasi lanjut edit canva buat UAS. in between jalan-jalan edit words, isi tabel, koordinasi persiapan pameran. di bus (semua pada napping) kerjain UAS lagi sambil nahan mual. di taksi menuju bandara mau balik pulang, check list LMS mana aja yang belum terkumpul. hft, all done. my PPG life is near to an end.

well there was a lil drama on the way back to Jogja from Surabaya. maksud hati ngejar kereta pukul 20.00 di stasiun Gubeng. apa daya jam 18.40 baru keluar Juanda karena ketahan di imigrasi untuk isi form pernyataan blah blah blah ~ mau nanges tapi tetap yaqueen. lanjut naksi sampai pom bensin besar itu (lupa namanya) untuk gojek ke Gubeng. alhasil 19.34 masih sampai perempatan taman pelangi 😭 udah gabisa, kita naik bus aja. kena calo pula, aslinya cuman 125 kena 265 😭 gapapa istighfar, Allah negur karena kurang amal. astaghfirullah.

sampai kosan pukul 01.32 dini hari. bangun jam 06.00 karena sengaja, lagi ga sholat. terus diingatkan dan dibangunkan teman. GET UP! WASH UP! sambil masih jet lag berangkat ke kampus diiringi grumpy karena tampilan gelar karya kurang seperti yang dibayangkan. ternyata pengunjung sampai di angka 170-an orang! lumayan yah daripada lumanyun 🥹

tanggal dua sembilan seminar PPG. kami UAS mata kuliah itu dengan ditanyai oleh para dosen dan Guru Pamong. deg-deg an lumayan. alhamdulillah the show went well. tiga puluh kemarin lumayan bisa bernafas. tapi masih juga ditagih tugas. padahal nilai sudah terpampang nyata hadir di canvas (LMS). hari ini niat hati menyelesaikan tugas itu, namun terkendala motivasi yang tak kunjung kembali.

.............

gak tau mau mengawali nulis bagian ini dengan apa. teringat jelas pesan dan kesan yang kami luapkan di tanggal dua sembilan. kami berempat belas berasal dari belahan provinsi di pulau Jawa, Sulawesi dan Nusa Tenggara Barat. kami bertiga (perempuan semua) berada di tingkat paling atas untuk kategori usia. iya termasuk aku 😒 srikandi ini berasal dari Solo, Ponorogo dan Banyuwangi.

Mbak Octa adalah teman pertama yang kukunjungi rumahnya karena pada saat itu gabut dan belum punya teman juga 😅 she is very patience and a putri Solo alike. keibuan sekali. she also has a doraemon big backpack. mau minta apa, tissue? jelas ada. HDMI? gas! fr*shcare? sok silahkan. payung? monggo. wait. jajan atau kue atau permen? habiskan! 😅 mbak, thank you so much for everything. you always remind me to take this and that buat lengkapin semua tugas. you didnt mind to pick us up eaaarly in the morning and taking us back home laaaate night pas kita studi wisata kemarin. you have a wonderful heart. glad our path cross! 🫰

The next one is Mbak Sisca. She is quite fierce and i love her for that. Our personalities are not far enough so we could blend so well. Kecuali aku lebih vokal dan galak aja sih. Mbasis iya juga tapi kadarnya 0.1 kalau aku 100 😂 She is sometimes savage in some cases and brutally honest with every talk we were talking. And she is a very lovable mom. She has a handsome son. Oh wait, Mbak Octa also has three children. They are truly wonder mom. Appreciate you always, Moms! 🫶

terus ada Sam Ida. well i know you dont like this nick name but sorry, thats how we (arema) call a name to express our good friendship that we are close enough to call each other like that. Mas Adi itu ketua kelas kita. Stand up comedian ala ala yang dengan ikhlas dan sabar menampung segala aspirasi rempong dua belas ciwi-ciwi di kelas. He has a good good heart. Sabar pula. Aku punya teman lelaki yang sabar, tapi imo mas adi termasuk yang suabar. vielen herzlichen Dank, für alles!

lanjut ke teman lelaki kita satu lagi di kelas. Fauzi. ya Allah bocil satu ini emang masih bocil. jadi rerata usia teman di kelasku ini adalah gen Z kelahiran 2000/2001. yak betul. usia kami terpaut delapan tahun. mereka ini seusia muridku yang sekarang sudah lulus S1 di Jerman dan udah kerja 🫠 dunia ini memang kadang eh enggak. seringnya suka ngajakin bercanda, Zi. ketawain aja. meskipun dalam hati nangis-nangis 😅 thank you for the help. maap maap nih kamu sering kena omelanku. as so you know, i never have any intentions on hurting people. i just say what i have in mind with that little high note. sorry.

masih sembilan lagi. banyak yah kalian! wkwk. kita ke Makassar gank dulu aja.. these four girls indeed come from afar. mereka datang jauh, bela-belain ke Jawa untuk belajar lagi. wahda si paling ekstrovert diantara kami semua. kalau dia sudah bersabda semua kepala langsung menoleh padanya. karena sabdanya pakai nada sembilan oktaf. bahkan yang di luar kelas pun terdengar 😅 i love you, wahda. kamu hebat, you fight for whatever it is in front of you to get the very best thing. kamu baca dengan sabar dan telaten semua modul kuliah kita baru menjawab pertanyaan²nya. aku? tentu saja hanya mencari yang ditanya 😅 biar cepat bisa selesaikan yang lainnya. saat-saat kita nugas di kosmu sambil bergosip kala itu, akan selalu menjadi kenangan buatku 💃 kamu juga si paling dokumentasi. semua harus rapih ada foto. biar ada kenangannya, katamu. ah aku pasti rindu semua celetukan² ala Makassarmu. eh kodong e, mulai melow ini 🤧

Fira dan Ela. Ela dan Fira. kalian yah! masyaAllah sampai PPL pun sama². bahkan dari kuliah S1. fira looks a very shy girl for the very first time i saw her. ternyata emang iya! mana polos banget, ya Allah bocil! 😅 fir.. selain jadi bendahara yang amanah dan rapi dan sabar. kamu tuh full of bright ideas loh. ppt kamu juga kelihatan rapih dan pas aja gitu. ga too much tapi bagus. pas pokoknya. aku suka minta ajarin kamu beberapa tricks main canva. thanks for that. maaf yah aku suka kelepasan ga translate ke bahasa indonesia. emang kadang setelan mulutku susah switch dari jawa ke indo, fir. wkwk. tut mir leid.

Ela, kamu ngajarin aku buat being present. ketika ada yang sedang berbicara denganmu, kamu dengan bahasa tubuhmu akan otomatis menghadap ke lawan bicara dan mendengarkan dengan penuh atensi yang tidak terbagi. ide-ide kamu juga suka membagongkan tau el. Makassar pride nih emang. kalian keren, rek!

srikandi terakhir dari Bone ini. ya Allah Nidar, semoga Allah memaafkan semua prank yang kubuat untukmu ya. asli niatku bukan untuk ngetawain, tapi biar kamu lebih aware dan ga mudah percaya sama orang lain. i learn a lot from you too loh. kenapa sabar banget sih jadi orang? wkwkwk jahat dikit boleh tau. sekali kali ya kan. asal jahatnya ga niat jahat beneran. tau kan maksud aku? 😂 apapun itu, semoga yang sudah kamu niatkan baik akan terkabul yah. soon or later. jangan lupakan aku! wkwk laf yu.

sekarang kita ke NTB. Mataram pride, Inas. ya Allah jiwa suroboyoku meronta setiap kali ngobrol sama kamu, Nas. meskipun seringnya kamu ya gak tau maksudku 😅 tapi I appreciate your will for trying to understand me. ncene arek UNESA ya. wkwk. Nas, i remember our conversations about we both know what. Apapun yang akan terjadi setelah ini, selamat kamu akan memulai yang kamu impikan. Kabarin jadinya jualan apa. Aku pingin beli! you are strong but you allow to not to be strong too. being vurnerable doesnt mean you are weak. justru kamu strong karena berani nunjukin sisi kamu yang itu. i learn that from you. belum tentu aku berani gitu juga. Go Inas Go Inas Go!

lanjut ke teman sebangku Inas, Yuly. nih bocil satu si paling ambis dan rajin nugas dan ngafé dan ibadah. masyaAllah tabarakallah. all and all kalau ngobrol apa aja sama kamu suka nyambung sih yuls. tua juga ternyata lo. wkwk. we both dont have any difficulities to adjust here and there just because we are the cablaks gank. yang selalu langsung konek kalau ngomongin LMS. langsung gas kalau diajakin jalan. si paling vlog juga. tanpa lo aku gaada video vlog ala ala di ig story sih yuls. lo dan Fira adalah vlogger kami. repost ig story: SIAP! ternyata dibalik sosok kuat bisa apa-apa semua sendiri, cengeng juga. wkwk. janjian jangan-jangan sama Inas? ayo ngaku! 😅 aku juga sih sebenernya cuman ga ditunjukin aja. malu 🫣 kalau ada apa-apa (nikah) kabarin. ntr aku naik kereta ke Bogor, dandan pakai kebaya syantik 🧕

yuks terus ke Pemalang kita. Teni Novianti. wkwk si paling muda diantara kita berempat belas. sesama jawa tapi suka roaming kalau ngobrol. istilahé bedha. hahah. i will miss our random chit chats and missunderstandings ten. kebaikan dan kehematanmu akan selalu menjadi yang dikenang. main lah ke rumahku. tak ajak ke Gunung Ijen. pasti kamu ga mau? 😅 thanks for telling me about C*tta that day so that i can make money tudey. soto ibu kantin dan donat depan fotokopi akan jadi kenangan khusus dari kamu. Prost untuk Teni Guru Bahasa Jerman Teladan se-Pemalang!

balqis. selain fira, balqis is the other quiet person on class. very, actually. tapi to be fair, you were the first person i sit with in our very first day Meeting at campus. terus aku main ke kosan teman pertama kali juga ke kosmu. gimana ga enaknya ketika kita harus PPL jauh dari kampus, sedangkan untuk pindah kos terdekat ga memungkinkan, masih keingat jelas di memoriku. pahit emang gabisa lepas dari hidup ya, qis. tapi insyaAllah manisnya kita akan dapat sebentar lagi. thank you for telling me that thru those memories. kayanya kamu juga pernah (atau sering? 🥹) kena omelanku. noch mal, we both jawa timur-ians right? you know i never meant to hurt you, dont you? 😅 wkwk sek mekso i lo. sukses qis! we'll keep in touch ya?

maula zahra. si kalem yang paling sering kena semprotan hama. ra, kamu ikhlas kan? aku lo ga maksud ngomeli. cumae yo ncene ngono. wkwk. ya Allah ra, koyo nemu adik ilang. meskipun agak butuh waktu untuk melakukan beberapa hal, kamu ngajari aku buat sabar dan teliti. yes you are right, you are the real observer. aku ga sesabar dan setelaten itu. dari belanja bareng, masak sampai aku ngungsi ke kamarmu pas kena gempa bumi lokal waktu itu. koyoe agak susah dilupakan 😅 jajan is lyfe. i love us for that. setiap rabu malam kajian Pak Faiz juga akan jadi tambahan memori tak terlupakan selama di Jogja. thank you for accepting while juggling everyday with my omelans. tut mir sehr leid, pasti ada gak sengaja menyungging perasaan. tak tunggu di Banyuwangi. kita ke Ijen, ojok lama-lama. balung tuwek rodok angel ra nek kesuwen 🤭 laf yu lil sis 🫶

Rek, makasih banyak sudah membersamai proses belajar both about life and the study itself. I cant thank you guys enough for everything. You dont know how deep it is for me to go thru this. Before meeting you my life was a nearly dissaster. But then Allah gave me a way to go to Jogja. To meet you all. Million herzlichen Dank. I know i will meet you again. Laf you. So much 🫶

[dailysandersidesaudoodles]

Hhh ......

Witcher au...............

[sukifans]

PET • RI • CHOR

[n] a pleasant smell that accompanies the first rain after a long period of warm, dry weather

ZUKO X OC SERIES

SUMMARY: a captured waterbender and the fire prince may sound like an unlikely pair, but kena never much cared about others’ expectations and zuko, well… he was just along for the ride

⏎ MASTERLIST // PART II « PART III » PT IV

Zuko was starting to enjoy his life in Ba Sing Se a lot more now that Kena was a part of it. She liked to visit him during his shifts to sit and do her coursework. Even though they didn’t get to talk much while they were both busy, he liked just knowing she was nearby. She radiated a calming energy from her table in the corner that seemed to make difficult customers and broken teacups a thousand times more bearable. In slower moments he found himself studying her — how her brow furrowed in concentration, the way she chewed her bottom lip, when she tapped her pen against the table as she read, and (his favorite) the small smile that her lips quirked into whenever she looked up and caught him staring at her. Uncle teased him mercilessly and almost always wore a knowing smirk, but it was okay because it made Kena laugh. Hearing her laugh after all these years was his favorite sound in the world and he tried to hear it as often as he could.

Kena liked to coax him out of the apartment when he wasn’t working. She claimed he still looked a little worse for wear after his travels and sulking inside certainly wouldn’t help with that. He complied easily, of course — she didn’t know it, but he thought he’d do pretty much anything for her. He was firmly wrapped around her little finger and, honestly, he didn’t mind all that much. That particular day they were both free and she had decided to take him up to the Middle Ring to visit one of the nicer parks. They sat in a large open field, leaning against a tree trunk in the shade of the foliage and relaying their stories from the years apart. She was trying to teach him how to weave a flower crown like she’d learned from a group of singing nomads but he was pretty miserable at it.

“Don’t laugh at me,” he muttered when he caught her grinning at his lopsided attempt that looked nothing like a crown, even by the loosest definition.

“You’re tying them together wrong. Look-“ she said. She leaned over and slowly showed him the proper knot. His brow furrowed as he watched her nimble fingers wrap and pull at the stems, resulting in a perfect two-piece chain amongst his many attempts.

“I don’t think this is salvageable, Kena.” He looked irritated, dropping it in his lap. She picked it up and pulled it over her head, setting it on her shoulders.

“Maybe not as a crown, but it makes a very lovely necklace, I think.” He smiled at her.

“That’s not saying much. You could make a rice sack look good.”

“Oh, uh... thanks, Zuko,” she responded, taken off guard by the compliment. She looked down at her hands as her cheeks warmed. They sat quietly for a bit, enjoying the gentle breeze on the warm day. She was surprised when Zuko shifted to lay down and set his head on her lap. When he noticed her wide eyes, he sat up again.

“Sorry, was that okay?”

She nodded. “Yeah, it just... surprised me, is all. Lay back down.” She put her hand on his shoulder and guided him back down. Grinning, she set the intricate crown of white and yellow flowers she’d made on top of his face. He squinted up at her. “A crown fit for a prince,” she declared. He rolled his eyes.

“I don’t think this is how crowns are meant to be worn,” he said.

“Forgive me, my liege.” She bowed her head dramatically. “Us common folk know not of such things.” She laughed when he groaned and closed his eyes, moving the flowers to sit on his chest instead. He sighed contentedly when she started playing with his hair, twisting the short strands between her fingers. Cautiously and delicately as one would handle a butterfly’s wing, she ghosted her fingertips over his scar, sending a not-unpleasant shiver down his spine. He cracked one eye open to be met with her questioning gaze.

“My father,” he said in response to her unasked question. He closed his eye again as she frowned and moved her hand back to his hair. “Uncle let me sit in on a war meeting and I spoke out of turn. I questioned one of the generals’ tactics and got challenged to an Agni Kai for my disrespect. I thought I’d be fighting the general, but since I had spoken out in the Fire Lord’s war room, it was my father. I refused to fight and begged for his mercy. He... did not forgive so easily, and- ow, Kena.” Zuko opened his eyes fully when she tugged too hard at his hair.

“Sorry,” she mumbled, dropping her hands. “I just- hmph.” She clenched her fists and sucked in a deep breath to calm herself. “I’m fine. Keep going. How did you end up in Ba Sing Se?”

“Well, I was banished after the Agni Kai. Uncle came with me — thank Agni, I think I would’ve been dead ages ago if he hadn’t — and we’ve been... traveling for the last three years. I think Uncle got sick of being on the move all the time, so now we’re here, I guess.” He carefully avoided mentioning his hunt for the Avatar. He didn’t want Kena to know that side of him because it might push her away. He desperately wanted to be the person she thought he was and he was terrified of losing her again. She was the best thing to happen to him in a very long time. Kena could sense wasn’t telling her something, but she knew better than to push him. He’d obviously been through a lot, and she wanted to be a positive force in his life. Positive forces don’t pry. He would tell her when he was ready.

“What about your mother?” She felt him tense up and she slowly began carding her fingers through his hair again, weaving small individual flowers into the inky black.

“What about her?”

“Did she try to stop the Agni Kai?”

He squeezed his eyes shut again and sighed heavily. “She left when I was eleven. I haven’t seen her in years. I don’t know why, or what happened, or even if she’s still alive, but I know she’s gone because of him.”

“And Azula?” She frowned at his scoff. “I know you two never got along, but she’s still your sister.”

“She only got worse as we got older. She was practically jumping for joy when I was banished because she could be Father’s little pet in peace without her failure of a brother around.” His voice was filled with bitterness as he spoke about his sister, mouth twisted into a deep frown.

“You’re not a failure,” Kena said gently.

“Only you and Uncle seem to think so.”

“Well, that’s because we’re smart. I’m quite proud of you, actually.”

He looked at her suspiciously. “For what?”

“For not going back. It’s very brave of you. You grew up sheltered in the palace and then were thrust out into the world with nothing after losing everything you knew. It’s admirable, how you kept going.”

Zuko felt his stomach churn uneasily. She was too confident in him, too ready to believe that he was as good and strong as he pretended to be. He felt sick lying to her but he knew he would feel much worse if she left.

When he was silent, she continued. “It’s difficult to go through all that and still make an effort to be kind.”

“I don’t think that’s how many people would describe me.”

“You’re a bit grumpy and gloomy, sure,” she laughed at his offended look, “but I think you’re very sweet.”

He ignored the warmth flooding his face. “It’s easy to be nice to a person like you.”

She smiled. “Kindness, compassion, empathy — they are all choices you have to make. If they were easy, the world wouldn’t be in a century-long war.”

“I’ve done a lot of bad things in the past.”

“We all have. We are products of our circumstances. Your whole life you’ve suffered and yet you’re still a good person.”

“I don’t think I’m a good person.”

“Well, I do. Good people make bad choices, too. Being good doesn’t mean being perfect.”

He avoided her eyes, focusing on ripping up the blades of grass. “You sound like Uncle.”

“Like I said, we’re smart.” She used the pad of her finger to smooth the lines between his brow, rubbing away his anxious look. They were silent again for a few minutes while he mulled over her words. She could tell he was deep in thought, so she just continued her ministrations on his hair while she waited for him to speak again.

When he did, his voice was soft. “My father used to say that Azula was born lucky, and I was lucky to be born.”

“What an idiotic thing to say,” she said simply. His eyes snapped up to her. He’d forgotten just how blunt she could be.

“Excuse me?”

“I think you’re luckier being you than her.”

“She’s a prodigy. She’s always been his favorite.”

“Yes, and where has that gotten her? Azula is still a child and yet she’s been driven to the brink of insanity trying to be good enough for your father but she never will be.”

“She was loved.”

“She was used. You were loved, Zuko. What about Iroh? Your mother? Me?” When he didn’t answer, she shook her head. “What your father gives her, that’s not love. You have both suffered at his hands, but you have people who love you. Azula doesn’t have love, she has fear. I feel bad for her. I hope one day she finds peace within herself. I hope she learns to love and be loved.” She propped her elbows on her knees and held her head in her hands, leaning over his face as her hair fell around them and shielded them from the rest of the world.

“You loved me?” he asked quietly, staring up into her eyes in amazement. Her heart broke a little at the shock in his expression.

“Of course I did. I’ve always loved you.”

His pulse raced at her words and he leaned up on his elbows to get closer, examining her face for signs of deception. All he saw was the gentle smile that graced her pretty mouth, the raised white scar stark against her brown skin, her soft grey eyes that beckoned him in. He could stare at her until he went crosseyed, memorizing every detail. She’d been cute when they were kids, sure, but now... he thought she might be the most breathtaking person he’d ever seen. His gaze flicked down to her lips and he thought about kissing her.

Before he could move she was shifting to stand, grabbing his hands and pulling him up to his feet as well. She propped the crown she’d made him onto the tangled nest of black hair and tiny wildflowers on top of his head before dragging him out of the shade and into the bright afternoon sun. She sighed happily before flopping down in the grass again to lay on her back, stretching languidly like a cat in the warm rays.

“Come on, fire boy; you need some sun. You still look sickly.” She patted the ground next to her and bent her other arm behind her head.

“That’s just my skin... water girl,” he muttered, rolling his eyes as he laid anyways when Kena laughed at his weak retort. She slid her hand over his and laced their fingers together. His palm radiated warmth into hers. She smiled and closed her eyes, tilting her head into the sunshine. His eyes devoured her, admiring the way the light bounced off her high cheekbones and silhouetted the slope of her nose and the gentle curve of her lips. She felt his stare and opened one eye.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

Like you love me, she wanted to say. “Like a weirdo,” she joked instead, poking her tongue out at him playfully. His huff of annoyance was betrayed by the small smile he couldn’t fully hide. They laid there for a while, just staring at each other and basking in the other’s presence with their hands still clasped between them. She scanned his face unabashedly. Anger still bubbled in her core when she saw his scar, only to be assuaged by the way his honey-colored eyes seemed to glitter and glow in the sun. There were no words in any language sufficient to describe how they felt being together again, but they didn’t need words. All that mattered was that it was the best and most content either of them had felt in years. Her heart felt remarkably full when he kept her hand squeezed tightly in his as they made their way back to the Lower Ring in the orange glow of the setting sun.

“Oh, I almost forgot to tell you the news,” he said suddenly, stopping in his tracks. She looked back at him with raised eyebrows, signaling him to continue. “Some men came by the tea house yesterday afternoon and offered Uncle the chance to start his own shop in the Upper Ring.”

She frowned. “What’s the catch?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged, “but they offered him total creative control and a new apartment for us. He agreed.”

“Oh,” she said hollowly, “that’s nice.” She dropped his hand and turned to keep walking, looking troubled. Surprised at her reaction, Zuko jogged to fall back in step next to her. He hadn’t meant to upset her.

“What’s wrong? I thought you’d be happy to hear that. It’s just like we used to talk about as kids, remember?” She sighed.

“I am happy. It’s just... I won’t be able to see you in the Upper Ring.”

“What? Why not?”

“People down here need a passport and approval to get up there. I don’t have either.”

“Oh,” he echoed her from earlier.

“Yeah.” They stopped outside her apartment and Kena avoided meeting his eyes. “But I am happy for you and Iroh. You both deserve better than this.”

He shook his head. “I don’t want it unless you’re with me. I can’t lose you now. Not again.”

She ignored the way her pulse jumped. “I’ll be okay.”

“I know you will, but I won’t. I- I need you, Kena,” he admitted, voice soft. “Finding you here is the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“Zuko...”

“Come with us,” he said suddenly, standing in front of the entrance to her building and taking both her hands in his. She sent him a sad sort of smile.

“I can’t just up and leave, even though I want to stay with you.”

“Why?”

“What about Fera? She’s been with me since my mom died. I go to school, I have friends, a job... I’ve been here for years. I had to make a life for myself.” She felt bad when the excitement fell from his face, but she couldn’t just give up the little illusion of normalcy and stability she’d built here in the Lower Ring. It was what she’d craved after a life as a political prisoner and on the run with her mother, on her own, or with Fera.

“You’re right,” he finally said. “I’m sorry, that was selfish. I understand.” She stepped forwards and hugged him, burying her face into his neck and soaking in his warmth like she’d done in the sun earlier. Though he’d tensed at first, he slowly wrapped his arms around her in return and held her tight. He’d buried his craving for friendly, loving touch after his mother left and now that she was here again and offering it so freely, so genuinely, he felt the walls he’d built around himself crumbling. It scared — no, it terrified him to sense himself becoming more vulnerable again (something that had for so long felt all too much like weakness). If he had to be weak for someone, though, he was glad it was for Kena. She was one of only two people in his life who had never hurt him or lied to him or left him (she didn’t leave him, he’d rationalized long ago; she’d been taken away).

“You can still come see me down here,” she mumbled into his skin. “People of the Upper Ring can travel as they please.”

“Yeah, I’ll do that. I’ll come see you every day, even if it’s just for a little while.”

“Zuko, you don’t have to-“

“I know, but I want to. I don’t want to go another day without seeing you ever again.”

“So dramatic.” She rolled her eyes as she pulled back but beyond her teasing tone he could sense her gratitude.

“I’ve been told,” he chuckled.

“I’ll miss seeing you at Pao’s, though. You always looked so cute in your apron.”

His face went crimson. “I am not cute,” he muttered as she giggled.

“Are you hungry? You can come up for dinner, if you’d like.”

“I promised Uncle I’d help him make roast duck tonight to celebrate the new shop. Thanks, though. Another night,” he said as he stepped back from her. She smiled.

“Sure. I’ll see you tomorrow, then. I want to come by in the morning to see you and Iroh off before you move up the social ladder.”

He nodded in agreement and started to leave, but not before she grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him close again to kiss his cheek. She giggled when he flushed again, just as red as the day he gave her that fire lily. He opened his mouth, then closed it again, then mumbled something about seeing her tomorrow and hurried away as she laughed. She loved how easy it still was to get him flustered.

A sense of guilt gnawed away at his stomach as he walked back to his apartment. He felt bad about lying to her again, but he couldn’t exactly mention his plan to steal the sky bison as a means to capture the Avatar without admitting what he’d done over the last few years. He felt so conflicted as the two sides of him tore further apart — the side that wanted to be who Kena and Iroh thought him to be, and the side that still wanted to prove everyone wrong by bringing the Avatar back to the Fire Nation. Maybe he could make Kena understand; maybe she’d even go back with him. If he fulfilled his destiny, surely his father would let her stay.

When Kena made her way up to Zuko and Iroh’s apartment early the next morning, she found it already deserted. She frowned as she left, wandering into the street outside. Had she missed them already? Did they leave the night before for some reason? She couldn’t imagine why Zuko would lie to her about something so silly. All she wanted was to say goodbye, whether or not they were actually moving to the Upper Ring.

She walked to Pao’s and asked if he had seen them. At the mention of “Mushi,” the man went into a long-winded spiel about loyalty and betrayal that left her regretting her decision to ask. As politely as she could manage, she excused herself and left the premises. She desperately wished she could talk openly to someone about everything going on. At this point, she’d made up so many fake identities and backstories that it was sometimes hard to keep straight what was real and what was false, and who could know what about her various personas. At one point she’d considered writing it all down somewhere but that would be difficult to explain should anyone stumble across it. Only Fera knew what was happening, and even she was still in the dark about some things. Feeling a familiar sting of loneliness, Kena resigned herself to returning home to wait for Fera to get back from work so she could vent for a while.

Iroh sat by Zuko’s side for the entirety of the day, unable to sleep despite being awake through the night at Lake Logai. He watched his nephew twitch and sweat in his feverish dream state, pressing cloths soaked in cool water to his forehead through the hours. He could hardly even enjoy his tea as he waited for the prince to awaken. Every time his breathing changed, the older man would sit up at attention, watching with baited breath. It now neared sunset, and Zuko had still not opened his eyes.

Watching the sky change color through the window, he thought about rumors he had heard amongst the peoples of the Lower Ring about a benign spirit that visited at night. If one left a white candle burning in the window with a strip of blue cloth hung nearby, she was said to appear and heal the sick and injured. The people called her Tui’s Daughter. The stories reminded him vaguely of the legend of the Painted Lady from the Fire Nation. As he lit the candle, he hoped she would happen through the Upper Ring this night. Perhaps a visit from a spirit is exactly what the prince needed to help along his inner turmoil.

No matter what she did, Kena seemed entirely unable to fall asleep. She tossed and turned in her cot for what seemed like hours to no avail. Something still felt wrong about Zuko’s sudden disappearance, even after talking with Fera about how flaky and dishonest men could be. It was like an itch in the back of her skull that she couldn’t scratch and it her made her antsy and restless. She sighed in resolution and abandoned her attempts at sleep to dress in the bright moonlight pouring in through the window. She had to know he was alright, even if that meant he’d abandoned her.

As she came to the wall that closed off the Upper Ring, she kept to the shadows. The area was crawling with guards and surely Dai Li agents to keep the elite of Ba Sing Se secure and comfortable. She’d snuck into the Upper Ring only once before, and it was the closest she’d ever been to getting caught. She hoped the blind spot that opened during the shift rotation hadn’t been remedied yet, otherwise she’d have to take more drastic measures. Patiently, she waited for the opening.

The spirits must’ve been on her side that night because she was able to slip through into the Upper Ring with relative ease. That, or the Dai Li were occupied elsewhere. Whatever it was she was happy for it because now she was running through the pristine empty streets, searching for some sort of indication of where Zuko and Iroh may be. She didn’t know exactly what it was she was looking for, but her gut told her she’d know when she found it.

A flicker in her peripheral caught her eye and she whipped her head around. A few buildings away, a white candle burned in a window on one of the upper floors. She had to admit she was curious; The people of the Upper Ring rarely called on Tui’s Daughter because they could afford the best doctors Ba Sing Se had to offer. The spirit tended to stay in the poorer areas, especially in the refugee ghettos, because they needed her the most. Despite her desperation to find her friend, she moved towards the apartment with the candle.

Iroh immediately tensed when he heard a creak from the stairs leading up to their apartment. He hoped it was the spirit, but was ready to defend himself if need be. He hid himself from sight when the knob rattled and the front door slowly cracked open. Relief flooded his body when he saw the intruder donned a long, flowing white dress and a black smiling koi mask exactly as the rumors had described.

“Thank you for coming,” Iroh said as he emerged from his hiding spot. “My nephew is very ill, but I’m afraid it is not a natural sickness.”

The spirit had jumped into a defensive position when he spoke. Now that they stood facing each other in full view, she lowered her hands. As he looked on, the realization dawned that this was no spirit at all.

“Iroh?” the woman whispered and the old man hummed thoughtfully.

“I’ll admit I was doubtful about the rumors, but I can say I never expected you to be Tui’s Daughter.” Iroh moved closer and bowed his head in greeting. She ripped her mask off to reveal her face and Iroh smiled when he recognized her. “Hello, Kena.”

A/N: was originally going to end this at crossroads but this is long enough and also seems like a good stopping point for now. thank you all for the lovely response to the last part, yall made my heart uwu and i hope you liked this one just as much!

TAGS: @beifongsss @the-lva-way @lammello @llorom6nnic @idkdude776 @aangsupremacy @royahllty @mamooska8 @bucky-blogs @youneedmemanidonotneedyou @eridanuswave @rosetheshapeshifter @fantasticchaoticwho @bwndito @dancerslovelife @justab-eautifulmess @whalerus

[dailysandersidesaudoodles]

May I just-

To procrastinate on inktober-

Doodle out these scenes-

Real quick because.

BOI.

Grumpy Virgil, and grumpy characters in general are my life vein

I know we all love smiley Virgil, but grumpy Virgil is probably my favorite Virgil. Don’t ask me why because I don’t k n o w

[havermut]

Berkawan dengan Ketidakidealan

Kadang kita harus nikmatin aja apa yang ada. Rumah yang kurang rapi, gaya berpakaian yang itu-itu aja, ritme kerja yang lamban, atau keadaan apa pun yang menurut kita kurang ideal.

Karena hidup itu berputar, jadi pasti keadaan yang kurang ideal itu, nggak akan menetap selamanya. Mungkin kadang kita buru-buru ingin mengakhiri ketidakidealan itu. Segala cara ditempuh agar segera keluar dari keadaan demikian. Sampai pada akhirnya, kita berhasil mendapatkan hal ideal menurut kita.

Tapi pernah nggak sih berpikir, mungkin sesuatu hal yang menurut kita ideal itu, ternyata terlalu ambisius. Dan setelah meraih keidealan, yang kita definisikan sendiri, kita malah ingin berbalik ke keadaan sebelumnya.

Ini yang sedang saya alami.

Beberapa waktu belakangan, saya merasa stagnan di tempat kerja. Kok kayaknya nggak maju-maju. Sampai akhirnya, saya berpikir bahwa saya harus segera keluar. Ada dua pilihan yang waktu itu saya pikirkan.

Yang pertama, beristirahat dari dunia kerja dengan mengambil cuti satu bulan, atau mungkin lebih, untuk mendefinisikan kembali aspirasi karir saya. Dan ini mungkin-mungkin aja karena bos saya waktu itu orangnya terbuka, dan saya pun terbuka ke beliau.

Yang kedua, mungkin saya harus mencari tantangan lain di luar supaya merasakan kembali dinamika dunia kerja yang bergejolak. Asyik juga sepertinya mengulang dari nol, jadi karyawan baru di tempat lain.

Dan waktu itu, saya pilih yang kedua. Akhirnya saya memberanikan diri untuk melamar di suatu perusahaan unicorn yang lokasinya masih dekat dengan tempat tinggal. Sungguh suatu impian untuk bisa kerja di dekat rumah, waktu fleksibel, gaya kerja berjiwa muda, gaji besar, prestige tinggi. Hmmm. Menarik.

Setelah melamar, ternyata jalannya cukup mulus, saya dipanggil interview. Semenjak itu, saya sudah berangan-angan jauh, bagaimana hidup saya ke depannya. Di benak saya, nanti saya akan menjadi seorang istri yang serba sigap dengan pekerjaan rumah tangga, sekaligus analyst yang handal di perusahaan tersebut.

Untung lah ternyata saya diterima di perusahaan itu, jadi saya nggak perlu merasakan patah hati. Tapi ternyata setelah itu, saya yang membuat mereka patah hati...

LOH KOK?!

Iya, soalnya baru sebulan di sana, saya sudah mengajukan resign.

Pastinya mereka kaget, namun ternyata, itu bukan hal yang aneh di sana. Cukup banyak yang nggak melanjutkan masa probation. Yah walaupun probation itu tiga bulan sih, bukan sebulan.

Apakah saya lemah karena nggak tahan kerja di perusahaan itu? Mungkin. Mungkin akan banyak orang yang beranggapan saya menyia-nyiakan kesempatan itu. Tapi saya nggak peduli.

Saya lebih peduli pada kesehatan diri sendiri. Karena entah mengapa, saat masih bekerja di sana, kepala saya selalu sakit. Daaan, selalu grumpy saat pulang ke rumah. Kasihan kan suami saya, kena imbasnya.

Saya lebih peduli hal itu.

“Kalo gitu, kenapa waktu itu diambil tawarannya?”

Hmmm, jujur, sebenarnya dari tahap terakhir proses lamaran kerja di perusahaan itu, terbersit sedikit keraguan di diri saya. Tapi waktu itu, saya belum bisa mendefinisikannya. Dan berpikir, “Yaaa, mungkin jiper aja mau masuk ke lingkungan yang isinya orang pinter semua.”

Tapi masa nggak dilanjutin usahanya. Jadi yaaa, saya mencoba. Berusaha menjalani apa yang sudah saya pilih. Berusaha bertanggung jawab. Walaupun di tengah keberjalanannya, ternyata saya nggak kuat. Nggak kuat menyamakan ekspektasi mereka yang sangat tinggi kepada saya. Nggak kuat dengan tanggung jawab pada titel yang cukup menjanjikan, di saat sesungguhnya — ternyata — yang saya butuhkan adalah ketenangan. Kesederhanaan dalam hidup.

Memangnya dengan bekerja di sana, lantas saya nggak bisa hidup tenang dan sederhana? Entah lah, ada suatu hal intangible yang membuat saya merasa sangsi bahwa semuanya bisa berjalan selaras.

Maka dari itu, saya akhirnya memberanikan diri untuk mengundurkan diri. Pamit. Dan nggak akan peduli dengan pendapat orang lain.

Sampai saat ini, saya nggak menyesali keputusan saya. Malah yang saya sesali adalah ketergesa-gesaan untuk segera hengkang dari pekerjaan sebelumnya. Namun saya beruntung, penyesalan itu masih bisa diperbaiki.

Pada akhirnya, ternyata saya memilih pilihan yang pertama, yaitu beristirahat selama beberapa bulan untuk mendefinisikan kembali aspirasi karir yang saya butuhkan.

Dan dengan kejadian ini, saya belajar untuk lebih menikmati ketidakidealan yang ada di sekitar saya, mencoba berdamai dengan itu, dan tidak tergesa-gesa menganggap itu adalah suatu permasalahan yang butuh solusi cepat.

Ya, ketidakidealan bukan lah musuh, melainkan kawan yang menghadirkan ruang untuk bertumbuh. Untuk memikirkan solusi yang bertahap, bukan dengan mengakhirinya secara langsung dan membuangnya dari kehidupan. Hingga dengan berjalannya waktu, kita mampu berkawan dengan ketidakidealan itu dan bersama-sama dengan keberadaannya, kita mampu menjadi sosok yang lebih dewasa, taktis, dan bijaksana.

[zachsgamejournal]

PLAYING: Kena: Bridge of Spirits

I'm still really enjoying the game. It's beautiful and smooth. The story, while well presented, lacks a sort of focus or clarity. Still--having a blast!

So gonna start with the story. Without much build up, you've been dropped in a forest with the unexplained goal of reaching a mountain temple--or something like that. Meet two children (that turn out to be spirits) looking for their brother, who is also a spirit. As a matter of fact, everyone I seem to meet is a spirit. There's a grumpy spirit that seems attached to the corruption of the forest, but he doesn't really want to chat all that much. So the early quests around about tracking the path of the Taro (big brother spirit).

The process of tracking down Taro is such a major chunk of the game, that I thought it was the whole game. That is, till I found Taro's spirit and put him to rest. A plague hit the village and he took his brothers into the forest. One day the mountain "cracked" and released a big explosion, sonic boom, like thing. Then he couldn't find his brothers and everyone died.

It's kinda weird...if the little brothers were also spirits why couldn't they go find their brother spirit? Instead of trying to reconnect, they just plopped around the forest chasing rots. I thought, maybe for a moment, that the game would be about putting several spirits to rest. While that seems to be kinda true--the fact that Taro and the twins takes up about 3/5 of the game--it's not really matching the pacing I expected.

The game is almost open world. They really keep you on series of maze like paths with natural barriers that wouldn't really stop anyone, but using Uncharted logic--ok sure, I can't go that way. I'm constantly reminded of Crash Bandicoot and Jak & Daxter as I play--which is a good thing for me. Anyways--if we thought of Kena like those classic 3D adventures (throwing in Mario 64), then having this open world would be great. And then you could have various spirits as quest givers. And they could send on you various tasks:

"I'm not ready to pass on without family crest" or something like that.

Then, as you helped spirits, you shattered spirit barriers giving you access to new areas. I think this would have allowed for many more stories, with a diversity of tone and sentiment--while giving you different perspectives on what happened to the village. I think that would have been better than spending SO MUCH time on a single storyline that didn't land very hard for me.

Why didn't it land? Cause everyone's dead. When the spirit twins first wanted me to find their brother, I expected their brother to still be alive, to still be looking. And then learning the fate of his brothers would have been sad, but also brought him closure. A bittersweet conclusion of yes they're dead, but they don't blame you and they're in a place with no pain or fear. Instead, everyone is dead and I don't know why they couldn't find each other.

I'm still not sure how the "antagonist" plays into this or if there's a real overarching story. It's like they wrote a halfway decent Disney movie, and combined it with a good action-adventure, but didn't find a way to meld-them.

The game is still fun and beautiful. It basically all takes place in a forest (which I love hiking in forests, so that's great). This means there's not a whole lot more than trees and rocks. BUT it doesn't look like they repeated assets and designs very much. Every area of the game looks uniquely designed and organic. It's not just prettily dressed corridors, but a conscious attempt to make each area look interesting and different.

The fighting is starting to feel a little tedious. It's not bad, but much of the game is just exploring (love it!), which doesn't leave me very prepared for the combat sections. Zelda spreads enemies through out, allowing the player to be in constant practice before taking on the more challenging fights. In Kena, by the time I get to a boss fight I've forgotten half my moves or what buttons to push.

This isn't really a complaint. I'm thankful for the combatless exploration--but sometimes the battles are so challenging that I feel like the pace suffers--as I'm not prepared for the battle. Plus, I hate the limited shield blocking and the parrying. Though I do appreciate how they've pulled a Zelda and made the weapons for battle double as puzzle solvers, like LocoRoco Cocorecho. What if they could stake on top of each other to be used as a rope: so the more you have, the higher you can reach. Or maybe use them to "fish" things out of holes and water. Stuff like that.

Finally, my favorite thing is the Rots. I love their cute hats and how they help about in different scenarios. I kinda wish more of the game was just based around collecting them and using them to solve puzzles. Kinda like

I've just unlocked a new area and met some new folks. I'm excited to see what comes next.

[ethresijournal]

Entry 29

...the audacity! What of the fact I was not feeling well enough? Well enough for -whom-? I had the right to go and try to save my friend - alas, that damned Vallarme though she knew better. Before I had a chance to express my protest, her syringe stuck in my throat. And then. Darkness. I think I've slept. Seeing the darkness outside the clinic, I assume at least quite a few hours have passed and the party has long left without me. Thus, I took my leave. It was the only thing I could do. Yet, I knew not where to go - and could not afford myself wasting any more time stumbling blindly in the darkness. I went for the Haven, hoping to find Vallarme there and demand a concrete answer from her - she knew where he was held! She did! She sent -them- away!And what a cruel twist of fate followed after. I barely managed to make my way inside, find the horrid woman and demand my answers - when I heard groans and screams from outside. The following hour was a blur. Screams. Deaths. So many deaths. So many undead. Tossing balls of fire, setting furniture aflame. Fire slowed them down. At least... to a degree. So many charred bodies. So many dead. I knew these faces. I spoke-... I-......it was chaos. Vallarme collected some of the wounded survivors. Asked me and a few others to hold our ground as she brings them to safety - and seeks help. I agreed - in my current state, I knew I had little chance of escaping the grasping claws and sharp teeth of the rambling beasts - and my decision soon had proven correct. No longer than a few minutes after, the regulars at Haven - some of which were very familiar, like sera Erenwe, Kalej and Rilyn-... I recognised the large man in Nordic armour (a hazy memory, that one-... he did appear in Haven sometime. And... I am rather convinced he tried to help me with the one named Til... or did he not? All appears to be a haze...). I noticed even a more recent face in the crowd - that of sera Inediah, the dark-haired and rather scary-looking woman that has recently made Haven her new venue. My heart leapt at the sigh of them joining the battle and cutting through the enemies so eagerly! Sera Erenwe with her two-handed sword, dancing together with sera Nord who swept enemies by the bulk! And what of sera Rilyn and ger frost magic? It was eye-catching! And sera Inediah who... ...I honestly do know not what she did. The magick she used was unknown to me, yet looked almost malicious in nature. But, yet - she was on our side, so how would I dare question a gift offered to me so eagerly? Sera Kalej was there as well, though she was keener on inspecting the divination pools, for reasons only she truly knows (I imagine) - though, part of me believes she researched how to weaken her enemy.Then, dear journal - I purposefully did not mention yet, in order to build the necessary expectations - but with them was none other than Sindarion, my dear friend, my kena. He looked the same I had seen him last time when we last parted - well, healthy and grumpy in his usual ways. Not as traumatised as I worried to see him. The battle raged on for a while - and only at the end, I could see sera Kalej's reckless but brave actions, which led to finally dispatching the final horror that the cursed woman decided to bestow upon us. The horror unlike any other was killed in just as spectacular fashion as it was born - dissolved into nothingness in what might be only an intricate illusion that brought a swarm of dragons to life. To be able to afford not only such powerful magick but an illusion to sustain it and make it even more impressive! Sera Kalej is truly a fierce and knowledgeable mage! A few hours after, following some cleaning and necessary maintenance of the Haven, Sindarion visited me once again. I was pleased to see him well and healthy - the battle left no scar nor wound upon him - and soon he appeared in good enough spirits, worried more about my own well-being than his own. I knew him to be a caring friend - but perhaps time and lack of a companion he actually trusts made him more affectionate and playful than I'd expected! The reunion felt like we met only after an hour of parting. It was good to feel his arms around me, the warmth of his body - and even feel his scent (thankfully unblemished by the stench of rot he sometimes came with after his nightly excursions). We joked, we talked about events each of us had missed... and all felt. Normal. Good. Once again. It was a long time since I felt that happy - perhaps, since the day we stood upon the shores of High Isle and I finally -felt- like I am away from Morrowind and free from my mother... ...free. I am still unused to that word.

[ikanbuntalsdiary]

Kmarin dpt paket yg ak tggu2 dan excited bgt, tp pas ak buka kok kcwa ya..B aja gitu..ihh knp sih. Bntuk dan warna sama g af malh, tp kok kcwa aj gt. Ky udh g mnarik samsek. Knp nih, lg bnyk angry nih..duhh bikin pusing. Capek tau g, grumpy mulu..ada aj y yg bkin sbel. Ky nulis post ini typo mulu pengen gw banting lama2.

Udh bgt nyoba sgla cara, sbr2..emg msh bnyk bljr sbr ni. Rasanya ky g brsyukur gt, kuranggg mulu rasanya, semuanya ky salahh aja, g ad yg bner.huffftt...

Kasian org2 trdkt gw ni jd kena imbas kekesalan. Tulisan ini sbg terapi jg spy ap yg ad di hati dan otak gw bs trsampaikn dan tersalurkan. Krn susahhh bgt bwt gw untuk menyampaikan isi hati scr lsg/lisan.

Harapannya sih, lbh lbih sbr dan syukur lg. Krn klo lg bener gw bnr2 ky org paling sbr sedunia. Ky g ad mslh. Pdhl dalemnya ya kan.moga aj gpp..it will pass, God is good all the time.

[sekisah]

Makrab KKN, Hectic Days, Hidup

Hai.

I am back. Maaf banget karena kemarin udah yakin bisa post tulisan 2 hari sekali, tapi nyatanya emang hidup nggak bisa diprediksi. Saking-sakingnya, kemarin cuman post tulisan lama biar Tumblr ada isinya. Maaf ya all.

Gue baru aja kembali dari Tawangmangu setelah sejak Sabtu melaksanakan makrab bareng sama temen-temen KKN. Makrabnya sebenarnya kepikiran soalnya kita ngga pernah spending time together, terus juga sebenarnya pengen bonding bareng juga sih. Latihan juga, biar ada gambaran gimana kalau besok udah hidup barengan selama 45 hari pelaksanaan KKN.

Sialnya, paginya tuh ada pembekalan KKN dulu makanya baru bisa berangkat siang. Mana materinya banyak banget lagi, kelarnya jam 11 lebih. Kalau diitung mah rugi bandar, soalnya nyewanya kan buat dua hari tapi cuman dipake sehari doang itungannya. Huh hah.

Selepas pembekalan, kita caw makan dan ngumpul lagi jam 1an. Jam 2 udah fullteam, terus akhirnya berangkat deh ke Tawangmangu.

Ini villanya tuh bukan yang ke arah Tawangmangu sih sebenarnya, tapi lebih ke yang arah Candi Cetho. Habis itu nanti lewat kawasan Kemuning, lurus lagi, nanti sampai deh di villanya.

Pemandangannya beneran asri luar biasa. Karena villanya beneran di ujung atas pegunungan, jadi bisa liat kota dari atas. Selain itu bisa ngeliat juga orang yang pada lagi main paralayang. Pengen sih sebenarnya nyoba, cuman ya sekali naik 300ribuan hehe makasih banyak all. Itu uang makan seminggu.

Oh ya, dari momen inilah aku jadi sadar kalau ngga boleh sembarangan kalau ngomong. Kemarin pas pembekalan, gue iseng minta tanjakan yang hampir 90 derajat biar menantang pas naik motor. Guess what? Beneran dikasih pas perjalanan ke villa. Ya nggak segitunya sih 90 derajatnya, cuman ya itu tinggi banget woi motor gue hampir nggak kuat. Omongan kedua ialah masalah villa, karena kemarin gue iseng nunjuk bangunan putih 2 lantai dan bilang jangan-jangan itu villa kita. Guess what again? Kayaknya gue nunjuk villa kami beneran.

Acaranya chill doang, sih. Lebih banyak main-main barengnya. Sorenya kita gitaran, sholat, terus bakaran sama masak mie. Anak-anak dalem memutuskan buat main UNO, sedangkan gue lebih pengen nyanyi-nyanyi mengisi waktu di beranda luar sambil menikmati pemandangan yang ada. Alhamdulillah ada banyak orang yang bisa main gitar, setidaknya gue yang useless dan nggak bisa main alat apapun ini, bisa nyanyi tanpa harus acapella atau diiringi suara angin, wkw.

Gue beneran cuman bisa takjub sih sama karunia Allah. Jam 7an malam, kota beneran indah banget dari atas. Lampu gemerlap kayak bintang yang disebar di perbukitan. Ada beberapa rumah di puncak bukit yang memancarkan lampunya juga, and somehow gue merasa tenang ngeliat rumah-rumah yang sendirian itu?? Gue gatau deh apa yang salah sama gue.

Jam 8an, Tuhan menunjukkan kemampuan-Nya yang lebih amazing: kabut. Kabutnya setebal itu sampai kota yang awalnya gemerlap mendadak gelap. Awalnya aku kita mati listrik di bawah, cuman pas liat kabutnya, aku jadi sadar kalau emang tebel. Dingin, tapi justru itu yang gue suka.

Malam itu menjadi salah satu quality time bareng sama temen-temen KKN, sih. Yang awalnya gue masih canggung sama beberapa orang, akhirnya gue bisa bercanda bareng sama mereka dan mengurangi rasa sungkan yang ada. Kita nanyi sampai bingung mau lagu apaan, mau teriak juga nggak bisa soalnya warga lokal udah pada tidur jam segitu, takutnya mengganggu mereka.

Paginya, as always, gue kesiangan. Wkwk. Itu kalau nggak kedinginan atau dicipratin air sama Bapak (salah satu anak KKN) sih fix gue nggak bakalan bangun. Gue kemudian sholat, dan karena nggak ada space di dalem villa, akhirnya gue sholatnya di balkon.

Sholat. Di. Balkon. Subhanallah, sebuah bentuk sholat with a view. Pemandangannya nggak kalah indah. Gue bisa melihat beberapa spot yang kena sinar matahari, yang ketutupan, awan, atau yang simply masih gelap karena belum kena sinar matahari. Rerimbunan daun juga masih segar, menampakkan warna hijau alami yang menyejukkan mata. Angin pagi adalah bagian paling epic dari semuanya. Gue selalu suka gunung, dan harmoni keindahan ini semua yang menjadi salah satu alasan terkuatnya.

Salah satu kendala hidup di pegunungan, selain susahnya nyari pom bensin, ialah susahnya nyari makan. Berhubung masyarakat sekitar kebanyakan berkebun dan memasak, akhirnya jarang banget ada warung nasi yang buka sejak pagi. Gue sama temen aja mesti turun beberapa kilometer sebelum akhirnya bisa ketemu warung nasi. Itupun masih mending, soalnya awalnya sempet nanya sama warga sekitar dan diarahin buat beli makannya di pasar aja.

Oh my, pasarnya 10an kilo ada deh kayaknya dari villa gue berada. Ya kali buk makasih banyak???

Terus pas balik ke villa, setelah dengan baik hati membelikan makan buat 15 orang lainnya, setelah berjuang melawan ular yang mendadak muncul di warung makan, eh dengan baiknya teman-teman meninggalkan gue jalan-jalan dan take foto secara ceria di alam. Untung gue masih sabar, belum gue oplos makanan mereka semua dengan makanan basi.

Terus abis itu nggak ada kegiatan lagi. Beneran literally pindah tempat tidur doang ke villa, wkw. Nyanyi-nyanyi, mandi, packing, terus foto-foto dan balik.

Gue seneng sih sama makrabnya. Pertama kalinya mengikuti makrab yang nggak diburu rundown dan kewajiban untuk melaksanakan tanggungan. Sekalipun gue emang udah nggak pernah masuk struktural kepanitiaan sejak awal tahun ini, rasanya tuh tetep aja beda.

Terus gue jadi bisa lebih deket sama temen-temen yang cowok. Gue selalu lebih nyaman berkomunikasi sama temen-temen perempuan. Dengan makrab ini, gue bisa lebih santai ketika berkomunikasi sama temen-temen laki-laki.

Gue juga jadi lebih tahu kebiasaan satu sama lain. Si A yang grumpy, si B yang tiap ketemu bantal pasti langsung tidur, si C yang hobi benerin kerudung, si D yang sama introvertnya dengan gue dan bahkan kambuh di saat yang nggak terduga, si E yang ternyata cuman butuh temen buat ngobrol, si F yang juga ternyata bisa bantuin banyak, dan lainnya. Seneng.

Kendala pasti ada. Malam hari, pas kami bakaran itu, mendadak hujan turun. Si A nih si grumpy, udah main nyeletuk aja: makrabnya gagal. Wkwk, padahal malam aja baru turun 2 jam yang lalu, dia udah dilabelin gagal aja. Untung temen satu fakultasnya langsung nanggepin dia: nggak gagal, cuman dialihkan aja bakarannya ke tempat yang lebih teduh.

Si A, juga nyeletuk lagi beberapa jam kemudian, di balkon pas banyak anak main UNO di dalem: apaan sih nih katanya bonding kok malah diem-diem aja. Bonding samp-

Dia nggak sempet melanjutkan omongannya sih, soalnya gue udah liatin pake tatapan yang nggak bersahabat. Temen-temen yang lain juga kayaknya nggak menggubris apa yang dia omongkan, makanya yaudah semuanya berjalan seperti normal.

Kayaknya gue harus membiasakan diri sama bercandaannya si A, deh. Gue nggak tahu ya dia masalahnya sama siapa, tapi dia kalau personal sama gue sih manis banget. Suka minta maaf kalau merepotkan. Pernah juga kami diskusi bersama mengenai beberapa hal. Cuman kalau di grup KKN secara overall, kenapa dia salty banget ya wkwk :(

Akhirnya kami balik jam 1an siang. Di tengah perjalanan, Karanganyar hujan. Tapi hujannya beneran cuman rintik-rintik dan tetep ada sinar mataharinya. Celana gue aja tetep kering selama melewati wilayah yang hujan itu. Gue sama sekali nggak berminat pake mantol, hehe.

Toh ternyata nyampe Surakarta juga panasnya masih naudzubillah aja. Hujan baru aja turun jam 7an malam tadi, lumayan lah buat mendinginkan suasana.

Gue jadi pengen punya villa di Tawangmangu. Buat investasi dan lokasi hidup di hari tua, sih, pas udah pensiun. Kan menyenangkan kalau bisa berkebun di halaman, punya rumah di lokasi yang damai, makan beneran dari hari kebun dan kolam sendiri, menjauh dari hiruk pikuk kota yang seringnya melelahkan. Definitely bakalan masuk salah satu target hidup: punya villa di Tawangmangu. Hehe.

Huft. Minggu ini rasanya beneran penuh, nggak tahu kenapa. Masalah magang yang nggak kelar-kelar, terus target tulisan yang harus diselesaikan, urusan KKN yang ternyata juga capek kalau ditotal, dan problem pribadi yang masih harus diseriusi dan nggak boleh dianggap enteng. Kakak pergi ke Jogja kemarin, padahal waktu itu gue butuh dia. Yaudah lah, emang seharusnya gue bisa belajar dewasa dan menyelesaikan permasalahan gue sendiri. Kakak punya tanggung jawab untuk mengembangkan dirinya, so do I.

H-berapa hari demisioner di BEM. Gue beneran berusaha memanfaatkan sisa momen nge-BEM ini dengan baik. Lebih sering ke sekre, banyakin bercanda sama anak-anak, lebih tenang dalam menyikapi konflik yang mungkin muncul.

Salah satu menteri gue juga udah yakin bakalan cuti untuk maju nyapres. Gue nggak bisa bantu apapun, sih, selain goodluck aja. Gue harap nasibnya dia bisa lebih baik dibandingkan gue.

Life must go on. Ah, life will go on, anyway. Masalahnya, gue udah siap apa belum untuk menuju stage berikutnya?

[brigdh]

Book Blogging

A Tyranny of Queens by Foz Meadows. The sequel to the portal fantasy I read last month. Most of the plot here is fallout from the climax of that book: Saffron has returned back to Earth from the fantasy world of Kena, but can she re-adjust to a 'normal' life? And if not, what choices will she make? Yena's adopted sister died in the final battle, but can Yena reclaim religious rights for her sister's funeral and learn more about her mysterious heritage? The evil king has been overthrown, but escaped – where is he and what caused his actions? What's up with the mysterious magic artifact he left behind in the castle? Sadly, I didn't like this book nearly as much as its predecessor. The biggest problem is simply a shift in the use of characters; whereas the first book divided its pages fairly evenly among a vast cast, A Tyranny of Queens is hugely dominated by Saffron and Yena. And I'm sorry to say it, but they're the most boring characters in this series. Both are an example of the 'normal teen girl dealing with events outside her experience' archetype, which is a fine enough archetype as far as it goes, but not one that's particularly exciting unless you give her some sort of distinctive personality trait, anything other than 'determined', 'hard-working', 'smart'. Buffy wanted to date boys and wear cute clothes; Katniss wanted to be left alone and was unexpectedly ruthless; Saffron wants... ? The characters who did grab my attention in An Accident of Stars are pushed mostly off-screen here. Yasha, the grumpy, staff-wielding elderly matriarch who was revealed late in the first book to be an exiled queen, gets something like ten lines of dialogue in this entire book. Viya, the young, spoiled but trying hard to improve noblewoman who is named co-ruler of Kena at the end of the first book, and thus should be navigating the delicate balance of maintaining equality of power while still learning to handle so much responsibility, gets literally two scenes out of three hundred pages. And so on through a whole list of really cool characters. Instead we get multiple chapters of Saffron arguing with her guidance counselor, then her parents, then her social worker over whether she should apologize to one of her high school teachers over a minor incident caused by a bully. Exciting fantasy! My second problem with the book, unfortunately, is much more fundamental. The plot revolves around discovering that the evil king wasn't really evil after all, but was brainwashed. I'm sure this is an attempt to do an interesting redemption arc, or to look at how even the worst-seeming villains have their reasons, but it didn't work for me at all. It felt like a cop-out to remove blame from the king by passing it on to a historic figure from centuries ago (who never gets an explanation for his evil actions, so Meadows hasn't really complicated the role of villains so much as pushed the question a few steps outside the main narrative). None of the many people who died in the wars he started or were tortured in his pursuit of knowledge get a voice in this second book, so I kept feeling as though the suffering he caused was conveniently being swept under the rug to get readers to feel sorry for him. In addition, for a book that tries so hard to be progressive, ending with 'it's not the king's fault! He was manipulated by a foreign woman who made him fall in love with her!' is, uh... not a great look. All in all, a disappointing book. But there was enough good about the series that I'll give the author another chance. The Written World: How Literature Shaped Civilization by Martin Puchner. A nonfiction book that makes its way through human history via the medium of literature. Each of sixteen chapters focuses on a particular classic and shows how it both influenced and was influenced by contemporary events, from Homer's Odyssey giving Alexander the Great a hero to model himself after to The Communist Manifesto inspiring revolutions across the world. A subthread is the development of the technologies of literature itself – the inventions of the alphabet, paper, the printing press, ebooks, etc. It's a pretty neat idea for a book! Unfortunately the execution is terrible. I started off being annoyed that Puchner never seems quite clear on what he means by the term 'literature'. He implies it only includes written works (in the Introduction he says, "It was only when storytelling intersected with writing that literature was born."), and yet many of the pieces he choses to focus on were primarily composed orally (The Odyssey and the Iliad, The Epic of Sunjata, the Popul Vuh, probably the Epic of Gilgamesh, certainly at least parts of One Thousand and One Nights). And yet there's never any discussion of what it means to go from an oral mode to a written one, a topic I was eagerly awaiting to see analyzed. It's just... never addressed beyond a passing mention here and there. Okay, fine, I thought to myself, Puchner means 'literature' as in 'stories'. But that doesn't work either, since once again many of his choices don't tell any sort of narrative (Saint Paul's letters, Martin Luther's theses, Benjamin Franklin's 'Poor Richard's Almanac', Confucius's Analects, Mao's 'Little Red Book'). So what does Puchner mean by literature, the central organizing principle of his whole book? God alone knows. My irritation with the book deepened when I got to Chapter Four, where Puchner claims credit for inventing the concept of the Axial Age: "It was only in the course of trying to understand the story of literature that I noticed a striking pattern in the teaching of the Buddha, Confucius, Socrates, and Jesus. Living within a span of a few hundred years but without knowing of one another, these teachers revolutionized the world of ideas. Many of today’s philosophical and religious schools—Indian philosophy, Chinese philosophy, Western philosophy, and Christianity—were shaped by these charismatic teachers. It was almost as if in the five centuries before the Common Era, the world was waiting to be instructed, eager to learn new ways of thinking and being. But why? And what explained the emergence of these teachers?" Sure, dude, sure. You came up with this vastly original idea all on your own. (To be fair, if one choses to read through the endnotes, Puchner does cite Karl Jaspers, though he still insists his own version is ~so different~.) He then proceeds to get basic information about the Buddha completely wrong. For example: Some form of writing may have existed in India during the Buddha’s time (the so-called Indus Valley script may not have been a full writing system and remains undeciphered). This sentence. I can't even. I almost stopped reading the book right here, it's so incredibly incorrect. It's like saying, "Thomas Jefferson may have been literate, but since we find no Latin engravings in his house, we can't be sure." Let me lay out the problems. The Buddha lived around 500BCE; the last known well-accepted use of the Indus script was in 1900BCE. That's a gap of nearly two millennia. The Indus script was used on the western edge of South Asia, in Pakistan and the Indian states of Gujarat and Haryana; the Buddha lived on the eastern edge, in Nepal. At minimum, they're 500 miles apart. There is no chance in hell the Indus script was remotely relevant to writing about the Buddha. And in fact, we don't need to guess at the script of the Buddha's time and place. It's called Brahmi and it's quite well attested – though Puchner doesn't once mention it. He does include a photo of an Indus seal, because why not waste more space on utterly irrelevant information. Let's quickly go through the problems on the rest of this single page: What mattered above all were the age-old hymns and stories of the Vedas, which were transmitted orally by specially appointed Brahmans for whom remembering the Vedas was an obligation and a privilege. Though the Vedas do have an important oral history, they were certainly written down by the time of the Buddha, and possibly as early as 1000BCE. The oldest Indian epic, the Ramayana, was also orally composed and only later written down, much like Homeric epics. The Mahabharata is generally considered to be the older of the two epics. Despite my disillusionment at this point, I continued on with the book. And to be fair, I noticed many fewer mistakes! Though possibly because I know much less about Renaissance Germany or Soviet Russia than I do about Indian history. I did hit several problems again in the chapter on the Popul Vuh, the Mayan epic. To begin with, the chapter opens with a long dramatic scene recreating the Spanish conquistadores' capture of Atahualpa, the Incan emperor. Incan. Who lived in Peru, in South America. The Classic Mayan culture was based in Mexico, Guatemala, and Belize – North America and a bit of Central America. This time Puchner is literally on the wrong continent. Once he finally makes his way up to the Mayan homeland, he focuses his narration on Diego de Landa, a Spanish priest who did indeed write an important ethnography of the Mayans of the 1500s. The Classic Mayan Era was over by 950CE, introducing a discrepancy Puchner does not deign to acknowledge. Even aside from that small problem, Puchner describes Landa's writings multiple times as "an account [...] that has remained the primary source of information on Maya culture." This entirely ignores not only the Popul Vuh itself; but the multiple other Mayan codices that survived Spanish colonialism; the many Mayan writings carved on their pyramids, palaces, and stele, and painted on their pottery; their murals of war, sport, and history; the enormous archaeological record of their cities, technology, and diet; and, oh yeah, the fact that Mayan people are still around today. Oh, my bad – Puchner does remember the Mayans still exist. Here's what he has to say about them: "My journey began in the Lacandon jungle. A bus dropped me at the border of the Maya territory, where a beat-up truck picked me up at the side of the road. The village of several dozen huts was located in a clearing in the jungle. Everyone but me was dressed in what looked like long white nightgowns. Men and women both wore their black hair shoulder length (I thought of the shipwrecked sailor who had gone native), and most of them walked around barefoot, sometimes donning rubber boots." That's it. That's literally the only mention of the modern Mayan people. (Puchner's in the area to learn about the Zapatista uprising, to which he devotes the rest of the chapter.) I'm so glad he spent ages detailing that and de Landa's biography instead of devoting any space at all to the contemporary persistence of Mayan beliefs, language, or rituals. When I first read its blurb, I looked forward to the rest of The Written World. Unfortunately it's the closest I've come to hurling a book at the wall in a long, long time. I read this as an ARC via NetGalley.

[DW link for ease of commenting]

[kvanessas]

miss him. my babeh yang sukanya ngomel2, posesif, ga bisa banget kalo telfon ga diangkat. temen berantemku. kayanya kita gak pernah ga berantem kalo ketemu hahahaha aku satu2 nya orang yang bisa marahin papa kayanya. yang lain pada ga berani. galak banget soalnya :( jarang banget komen kalo aku curhat padahal mulut udah berbusa cerita. tapi sekalinya ngasih nasehat..... kena banget. pernah waktu itu lagi cerita panjang lebar terus lsg di cut sama babeh. "udah cukup ceritanya. dari situ aja kamu harusnya sadar kalo ga baik. buat apa lagi?" deg. gila sih itu langsung diem aku dibuatmu beh. trus pernah juga waktu itu ijin mau jalan sama seseorang. "beh besok aku mau jalan yaa sama ..." lalu hening. ga dijawab apapun. 1-2 menit kemudian babeh tiba2 bersuara "ness gapapa bertemen deket, tapi jangan dulu berkomitmen ya. perjalanan kamu masih panjang" .......... diem dulu ini ceritanya berapa detik. "jangan nyakitin orang, jgn kasih harapan kalau belom yakin. pertimbangkan baik2 sebelum berkomitmen. kalau tiba2 kamu sama orang lain atau dia yg sama org lain gmn? nanti hubungan baik kamu malah jadi rusak" jadi intinya babeh nyuruh aku untuk ga berkomitmen sebelum yakin nemu orang yg tepat u/ dijadikan teman hidup. babeh mengajakku untuk berpikir panjang sebelum mengambil keputusan. endes sih babeh. setuju kok aku beh. huuu kangen ndusel2 babeh bayik besarku, my mr. grumpy ❤️ he may has many flaws but still he is the best. he loves me & i do love him too. semoga Tuhan selalu menjaga mu papa, seperti Dia menjagaku disini. amin.

[belahalim-blog]

Welcome first years love 🖤

Hey readers, mau ngenalin satu orang yang suka sok ide, suka nya marah marah, suka nya ngomel, suka nya emosi, bawel nya ngalahin perempuan, kalo lagi kesel melebihi ibu ibu yg lagi pms, judes, jutek, si suara cempreng, gabisaa nenangin orang kalo lagi nangis atau kesel, si ceking yang mirip jamur, tapi sayang banget sama dia 😘😘😘

It's not my first time masukin muka dia di blog gw yaa... Sebelumnya sempet cerita sedikit tentang dia di part my birthday, he is my grumpy boy, Devid Sutanto... Time flies too fast, quotes yg paling mainstream kayanyaaa.. 1 tahun sudah terlewati masa2 seneng, bahagia, happy, unyu, sweet, sampe emosi, kesel, teriak2an, sedih, nangis bombay, nangis guling2 sama dia.. Cepet? Well, sometimes feel like that BUT sometimes i dont think so... Banyak2 hal2 dan moment2 yg uda kita lewatin bareng2...

Bukan hal yg mudah setahun ini gw jalanin... why?? Almost 10 tahun kenal sama sosok jamur ini.. berawal dari temen nya koko sepupu, temen, temen maen, calon mantan cici sepupu 😒😒, jadi strangers, temenan lagi, eh jadi kaya orang asing, baikan jadi temen, and then become my one and only BOYFRIEND.. hopefully my future 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 Uda kenal secara luar seperti apa sih dia & dia juga kenal luar dalem keluarga gw kaya apaaa.. secara diaa temen baik nya bapak2 di keluarga gw yaa... So... setelah kelepek2 kena "susuk" nya dia, berujunglahh hubungan ku yg penuh lika liku itu dengan dia menjadi "in relationship" eaaaaa hahahahhahaha..

Mau throwback dikit ke awal2 di tembak di tol guys di tol... gak ada so sweet nya kan.. jadi cerita nyaa tuh, dia mengabulkan permintaan gw untuk pergi ke taman safari, ada feeling2 cantik sih bakal ditembak disituuuu tapi gamau berharap tinggi2 takutnyaa sakit sissss bro sekaliann.. well setelah almost seharian di taman safari, ada tanda2 nih dia ngajak naek gondola but... jengjengjeng selesai maen gondola pun gak ada tuh perkataan2 menyentuh hati 😥😥😥 Untung gak berharap lebih yeee wkwkkwkwkwkw...

Tapi di perjalanan pulang dari puncak to bogor finally dia menembak ku 😍😍😍😍😍seneng sihh si "cinta monyet" kaya jadi jodoh.. Bukan hal yg gampang loh gaess nerima bocah ini, eh bukan bocah umurnya tua an dia 4 tahun tapi muka nya muda an dia kok ya? Banyak pertimbangan yg harussss dipikirkan, karena takut menyakiti pihak2 lain kan yaaaa....

Tapi in the end, gw menerina diaaa.. bukan karena dia cinta monyet gw yaaa, but memang uda gak mau lepasin dia kayanyaaaa.. Balik lagi, alasan kenapa gak gampang.. setelah tau sifat "luar" nya seorang devid dari dulu sampe sebelum jadian, but setelah berjalannya waktu tau tuh sifat2 yg orang lain gatauu, hal2 perintilan tentang devid, jeelek2 nya dia kaya apaaa... but sampe sekarang masih belajar bareng2 berdua buat nyatuin segala perbedaan satu sama lain, lagi jadi dewasa satu sama lain, dan jadi orang yg jauh lebih baik dari sebelumnya...

So, bener banget tuh kata orang2 kalo suatu hubungan tuh lurus2 ajaa, manis2 ajaaaa, tapi tuh pasti ada gejlokan, lobang, belokan dan lain2 nyaaa... Jadi waktu ngiri liat hubungan pasangan lain jauh lebih enak, lebih so sweet, lebih baik dari kita.. gw sih selalu inget yaaa, "apa yg orang lain kasih liat diluar ke publik, hubungan the best menurut kita, pasti ada masalah2 yg kita gatau ajaaaa, gak mungkin suatu hubungan lurus2 ajaaa", hey jalan tol ajaaaa lurus tapi masih berbelok2 kokkk hahahahahahhaga Sepanjang setahun kemaren, biarlah menjadi pelajaran buat gw untuk mengenal, mengasihi dia lebih dan lebih...

Merubah seseorang itu hampir impossible kalo menurut gw, yaaa kalo memang diri dia uda bawaan lahirnya begitu, mau sesayang secinta nya apa dia ke kita, sangat susah, but itu belom tentu berlaku untuk kalian yaaa.. merubah seseorang memang susah menurut gw, tapi gak ada salahnyaa menerima apa yg ada sama diaaaa dan perubahan dalam diri seseorang itu masih tetep bisa kokkk cuman ya butuh waktu dan proses pelan2.. Jadi kalo belom ada perubahan, ya terima apa ada nya aja dia.. karena pada akhirnya dia akan sadar kokk dengan sendirinya, pasti deh hahahahahhahaha

Okay, segitu aja ceritaaa ku tentang setahun ku bersama my grumpy... Oiyaaa, foto2 diatas itu diambil dalam rangka anniversary kita gitu, tadinya gw ajak dia lagi ke taman safari tapi dia bilang makan ajaaa, jadi kita pergi dinner cantik di L'avenue The Hermitage.. Cerita lagi sedikit, dinner nya itu memang lewat dari tanggal jadian kita, karena tgl 3 agt 2017 itu jatohnya di hari kamis, dan si bapak itu sibuk mencari icisss, dan akhirnya memilih tanggal 5, tapii ternyataaa tante aku meninggal, so acaranya pun diundur ke tgl 12 hehehehhe gpp deh yg penting jadi...

Yauda deh segitu dulu cerita nyaaa, tar pada eneg baca nyaaa... gw bukan expert di bidang cintaaa atau ahli percintaan.. tapi disini pengen sharing aja kehidupan ku... Once again, Happy anniversary sayang... I know you are not a romantic guy but from your action i know you love me so much, right? I love you baby 🖤🖤🖤

Since 3 Agt 2016

With love,

Isabela

[ciklisawangi-blog]

. Bila grumpy sebab stuck dalam jem beria ia, rasa nak meroyan sorang sorang pun ada! . . Bahahaha... nasib lah korang kena hadapi Cik Lisa mengarut sebab serabut tak gerak gerak sampai sejam tak pasal pasal! 😂. . . Yessss! Hari ni belanja korang muka sememeh Cik Lisa dan eyebag yang mengada ngada! . . Semoga terhibur dan salam perkenalan untuk semua! Eh! 🙊.. . . . #HariNiTajukDiaCikLisaSemataMata👻 #JadinyaAcaner😱 #PleaseTakmoKecamSaya😂

[alyyani]

Its a routine every weekend.. aku akan drop EO dalam bath tub untuk anak bujang aku berendam. Depends on his current condition. . Kalau tgh selsema batuk - lemon Kalau tgh grumpy / tantrum - lavender + peace & calming . Kalau korang masih pakai baby bath tub ni try lah drop EO kat dalam ni. 1-2 drops will do. Moga mendapat manfaat. Anak lebih tenang, kalau tgh tak sihat membantu juga menurunkan suhu contoh nya, melonggarkan lungs area. . Tu tgh berendam dgn peace and calming. Somehow aku rasa it relate lah kot handling emotions with EO ni works. Sendiri mungkin tak notice tapi orang lain perasan. . Contoh last monday they were asking me camne korang 1 family boleh pegi sogo and settle within 2 hrs beli baju raya. How u guys handle the kids. Come to think of it, kitorg mmg the whole family using EO. Yes aku guna banyak EO untuk stress relief, untuk anak2 yg kena sentiasa dalam keadaan bertenang. Penyapuan sekali dua tak nampak apa2 kesan. Ia kena sapu secara berterusan. . Aku suka - peace and calming - lavender - gentle baby - stress away - joy - release - ylang ylang - valor - frankincense . Kalau korang ada issue untuk handle korang nye emotion, berdoa sudah, korang seriously perlu kan EO. ✌️ . #oilrangers #kakakoilers #younglivingessentialoils #younglivingmalaysia . Alyyani 012-696 4801

[riisume]

I try to change the formality and everything about it People killing people for a reason You make mistakes you don't regret So make a conclusion

I listened to Change of Formality by Infected Mushroom for the first time yesterday on the train ride to NYC.. The edgy AMVs in my head were going crazy and I saw this in my head with my girls so I had to draw them all...

MINORS DNI

[riisume]

More KENA doodles from today!! The first is KENA being cute with her Happy side active...! The second one is KENA and the ENA's height differences as chibis!

MINORS DNI

KENA's Grumpy side under the cut, just the dialogue's really mean so I'm hiding it there lol!