#Leo finally made some hot friends I’m so proud

[well-its-not-human-anymore]

Touch starved/ hurt reader - hcs or scenarios the turtles? Reader super cool regarding friendship, like funny and open etc etc, but if someone tries to do anything that implies a bit more regarding romantic stuff they are kinda like oop- no. Reader is kinda jumpy and just freezes when someone’s they like does any kind of affection ( blushes a lot, try to run away and avoid those situations) people have taken them for granted which has make them a bit cold and defensive in that area- they want to be more affectionate ( which they know deep down it’s what they crave) but it’s kinda they are a scared / angry cat? Please, hope this makes sense, thank you

( also regarding looks and gender I think you can go with they/them so everyone can see a look but if themselfs in the scenario, and if you are going to any kind of skin ship, make the reader extremely defensive over their arms and tummy pls, I do love hugs but if anyone touches my hips I’ll try to get away so fast omg sbbtjfjdkdksn and I will just close off momentarily, I absolutely hate it, I’m more on the heavy side ( talk and chubby ) and if anyone’s touches the “giggly” parts I get extremely upset ( because of how ppl havemade fun of it over the years) and I think the boys would be very “??? What?” To that reaction cuz they didn’t think it was some thing bad to have? ( like a more soft and chunky/chubby body) because they haven’t been exposed long enough to society’s judgment or beauty standards ( I mean they know about! The ones who would have read more about it maybe it’s Leo and Donnie, but what I mean maybe they have never experienced something like this - themselfs irl) Eitherway this ask is already so long omg I’m sorry and thank you, if it’s too much you don’t have to do it, have a good night/ day!)

Okay first of all I love you and I would die for you. You are a perfect human being and there is literally no one else like you. Your body does a damn good job of keeping all of your organs in place and that's what matters. If anyone tells you different you rock their absolute shit.

And don't worry, I understood the request perfectly so no worries on that, I've got a similar body type except I'm really short. But I'm also super defensive over being touched or having those parts of my body perceived, so trust me when I say you're not alone. We be vibing with this together.

Now to the writing!

TMNT Headcanons

Boys reacting to a touch starved/defensive reader

Michaelangelo

Look man, our boy here is body positivity central, he thinks you look amazing and he wants everyone to know it

As far as you two go he's your best friend, your homie, your main man

So of course he's gonna wanna show you off, why wouldn't he?

He doesn't think you'd have a reason to not be okay with it, you've always been playful with him and his brothers

So obviously there's some widespread confusion once Casey gets tossed into the mix

All Mikey had done was reach behind him and snag you by the waist to pull you over

That was all

The words "and this is my best friend, y/n" never got the chance to leave his mouth

He was definitely not expecting you to squeak out in protest and scramble away from him as fast as humanly possible

Your face was burning red and you were clutching your sides, desperately trying not to bare your teeth in defence

Mikey couldn't help but feel heartbroken

Was there something wrong with him?

You sent Casey an unenthusiastic wave before turning on your heel and basically running out

Leaving a very confused orange turtle behind you

When he finally managed to catch up to you later you rushed to explain why you'd reacted the way you did

You couldn't stand his expression when you explained that no- you didn't think he was disgusting and no, he hadn't done anything wrong.

But he did seem baffled at you telling him that it was because you hated being touched there.

"Look Mikey, I've got no problem with the whole contact thing but you gotta give me a warning or something before you go around grabbing me. Okay?"

He was 100% fine with that

Anything to make you comfortable

But you both got to the point of being able to laugh at your reaction to the turtle trying to hold your hand

"Seriously Michaelangelo, I have a reputation to maintain. How am I supposed to do that when you're giving me feelings?"

Donatello

It completely baffled him

By all accounts it didn't make sense

You threw around compliments like you were playing hot potato and for whatever reason you'd always find someway to playfully flirt with him

But the second one of his brothers suggested something other than the innocent friendship the two of you had you would shut down completely

And coincidentally those types of comments were made at the most inconvenient times

Nothing screamed awkward more than you going stone cold and standoffish over a piece of pie

Bubbly and excited one moment, tossing around those positive affirmations to your favorite people

And staring murderously at an inanimate object the next

You were like an unsolvable rubix cube to him

But he was determined to figure you out

"Y/N?"

You didn't appear to be busy, just sitting on the haphazard bunk in your makeshift area with a book in your lap

The others had gone out on patrol and you weren't sure where Splinter was at that particular moment which left you and Donnie holding down the lair until they got back

The perfect time to approach the subject

"Hey y/n? Can I ask you something?"

His voice always got a little louder when you were alone, less afraid of being overheard. You looked up with a smile

"Fire away Dove."

His cheeks flushed in surprise

"uhhhhh... whydoyounotlikeme?"

You set your book down and leaned forward to stare at him

"Elaborate."

And he did, god he did, he did it at the speed of sound of course, but you caught every word

let me tell you, this boys heart broke for you when you told him that you did like him

you really really did

but the thought of being romantically involved with anyone made you shut down

Donnie assured you that it was fine

he'd wait for you as long as you needed

Raphael

Look, Raph knows a thing or two about being self conscious

out of all of his brothers he's the one who worries about his appearance the most

but you- holy shit he thinks you're the most amazing, perfect human in the world

so when he finds out that you hate being touched and that thinking about relationships makes your skin crawl he doesn't know whether to genuinely cry for you or punch someone in the mouth

both is okay

You'd always been very bold with your words and sometimes you'd even joke that you couldn't even tell when you were flirting with him

it just slipped out

and hearing that even though you could pull that off as easy as breathing and compliment all of them endlessly but you struggled to be comfortable in your own body?

that was a lot to unpack in one sitting

but the longer he sat with you and listened to you talk him through it the more he understood

sure, it was horrible

and he wouldn't likely stop thinking about hurting the people who'd done this to you (there'd be too many to count)

but you had a way of making him understand things

it was his favorite thing about you

"Uh- you know y/n, I uh- personally I think you look great. Like- all the time."

plz insert awkward finger guns here

there, your playful smirk was back and you were wiggling your eyebrows at him

"Awhhhh... is that Raph I see having feelings?"

Leonardo

he'd done enough listening and reading to know how society treated people who it thought was different

and he hated that you'd had to experience that for most of your life

when it came down to it and he saw that you had become particularly hard on yourself he took it upon himself to check in with you

that's how you'd started meditating with him

and you'd found it quite relaxing if you were completely honest

Leo told you that meditation was the best way to connect with your body and understand it

you hoped that in time you would understand what he meant by that

but the positive affirmations were doing something, so you'd take it

he'd always encourage you when you couldn't yourself

and always jump to your defense when the others got a little to out of bounds with their words

you still would noticeably flinch when touched without warning

they were all working with that

and he still found himself saddened that you'd recoil back into your protective walls if anyone mentioned anything inherently romantic

but you were coming around

and he was endlessly proud of you for that

Alright I hope I was able to get down what you were thinking. This one definitely took the most contemplating out of any of the requests I've gotten so I hope you like it!

[sylvain-writes]

Thanksgiving (Raphael x Casey)

Rated: T M/M, friends to lovers, love confessions, thanksgiving, Casey can cook, light angst and fluff, mutual pining

The couch groaned in protest as Raphael flopped himself upon it. "Ugh," he sighed, laying a hand over his stomach, "I don't think I can move."

"Seriously?" Casey followed him in from the kitchen, still holding a tea towel and raising his eyebrows in disbelief. "I spent all day in there cooking my ass off, but you- You, you don't think you can move? Unbelievable."

"Come sit down, will ya?"

"There's a mess in there. I cook, you clean, remember.? We had a deal, man."

"Yes, dear."

"Don't ‘yes dear’, ‘schmess dear’ me." Casey tossed the towel over his shoulder and sat down hard on Rapahel's extended legs. "You look like you're about to pass out."

"Leave the dishes, man. I'll get to them later. Right now I need a nap, seriously."

"That's fucked up, Raph."

"It ain't." 

Casey squirmed on Raph's knees and Raphael scooted down to adjust their fit on the couch. It put Casey in his lap and Raph tried not to enjoy the pressure of him on his thighs. He and Casey were friends, nothing more. The way Casey stayed close these days. The way his eyes lingered on Raphael when they worked out. Those were just things Raph was imagining. 

Raph had been acting strange around Casey and he knew it. Casey knew it. Hell, his brothers knew it, and he hadn't even brought Casey around them in weeks. 

Maybe that was the problem. He’d stopped bringing Casey around the Lair. They'd been spending time at the apartment, they'd gone out to patrol together, they'd trained a bit together, but Raph stopped bringing Casey down to the sewers. 

Part of the reason was because of his brothers' watchful eyes. They'd be able to see Raphael was being different with Casey now. But part of it was because Raph worried Casey didn't like it down there. 

Casey was always one to speak his mind, and he poked fun of Raph's cluttered bedroom. He asked why, in a sewer full of empty spaces, Raph still shared a room with Mikey. He asked why they kept furniture made of old pizza boxes instead of upgrading to hand-me-down dumpster dives or stuff from second-hand shops.

And Raphael didn't want to answer. He didn't want to tell Casey that the room was cluttered because Raph had a problem letting things go. He was afraid to admit that out loud, because things weren't the only thing Raph was afraid to lose. He was afraid to lose people, too. Especially after losing his father. And Casey was high up on the list of people he didn't want to lose. But if Casey knew that, Raphael worried it would somehow scare him off. 

Casey didn't like to be held down. Raphael could see that. Casey didn't keep much around. His apartment was sparse. His contact list was short. He was going to spend Thanksgiving alone because he didn't speak with his family anymore. How he could give up relationships with family, Raphael didn't understand. Casey didn't explain. And Raphael didn't ask. 

Raph didn't want to say the reason he held Mikey close was because his little brother somehow kept him safe from nightmares. It was strange, the first night they slept apart. Well, sleep isn't the right word for it. 

The first night they tried separate rooms, after puberty dictated they definitely needed some privacy, neither of the brothers got much sleep. Raphael tossed and turned, waking in cold sweats. When he started screaming in his dreams, it was Mikey who rushed to his bedside, and eased him awake with soft pets to his arm. They didn't bother trying to sleep apart after that. Mikey said he had trouble sleeping away from Raph as well, but Raphael always wondered if that was because Raphael had kept him awake or if Mikey really had been restless on his own.

And the reason their family kept old furniture they made themselves was because none of them could risk a trip to a second-hand store. Sure, it seemed like they made good for themselves. There was a pizza parlor that was friendly. They didn't ask questions about the big guys in strange trench coats and hats that ordered take out a few days a week. And there was the Chinese place that slipped them extra orange chicken whenever Mikey went to pick up their order. And the herbalist who definitely knew they were mutants, but kept their suspicions quiet, passed them satchels of tea along with the things they ordered. 

If Casey knew these things, he wouldn't want to spend time with them. He wouldn't want to waste his time with some hoarder who still needed his baby brother to help him through nightmares like he was some little kid afraid of the dark. Monsters under the bed and all that. No matter that Casey and the guys knew first hand that monsters were real. 

"What are you thinking about? Looks like it hurts."

Raphael didn't want to admit that it really did. His chest ached as he looked down at Casey in his lap. Casey who just wouldn't understand. Casey, the one person Raphael desperately wanted to be understood by. Instead of answering, Raphael turned and dumped Casey onto the floor. 

The man landed on his feet but made a grunt of indignance at the affront. "You really gonna leave the mess for me?"

"Nah, I told ya. I'll get to it later."

Casey looked over his shoulder toward the kitchen and made a deep sigh. The sour look on his face did things to Raphael's stomach. Casey looked disappointed and hurt. Two things Raphael never wanted to be the cause of.

Raphael swung his legs over the couch and pushed himself to stand. "Alright alright, I'm up. I'm up." There wasn't that much to clean, Raph thought. But when he reached the small table in the kitchen, Raphael let out a long whistle. But he didn't complain. 

Casey looked like he was gearing up for a fight, like he was waiting for Raphael to protest. 

But Raphael didn't dare, and a part of him twisted sharp at the thought that Casey thought so little of him, that he'd really leave the mess after Casey put together such an impressive spread. 

When it looked like Casey was going to help, when he reached for the ramekins of bread pudding, caked and crusty with the remnants of dessert, Raphael quickly grabbed them from the table.

"Said I'd do it," Raphael reminded him. But Casey didn't look convinced and that hurt. "Dude, come on."

Raphael carefully placed the ramekins in the sink, still impressed and surprised Casey had that kind of dishware in the apartment he could afford alone on a detective's salary. Raphael wondered if he should say something about the place. It was nice, if sparse. A modern ‘less is more’ kind of feel. 

Raphael wasn’t sure he had ever mentioned he was happy for Casey getting the promotion. That he was proud of him. But that was stupid right? You couldn’t be proud of someone for something you had no part of, right? 

Sensei was proud when the turtles succeeded because he trained them. Leo expressed pride when his brothers did well because he was the oldest and led them. 

But Casey's older. He's independent. He's his own man and fully capable of surviving and thriving without some guy hanging on his every word and telling him how great he is all the time. So Raph kept the words to himself.

Instead, he took Casey by the shoulders, sat him on a stool at the short breakfast bar, and turned to grab the can of coffee from the counter. 

Casey looked up at Raphael with a quirked eyebrow and a curled lip, and Raphael tried not to think of his confusion as something sweet. As something cute. He tried not to think about how much he’d like to kiss those lips and make them smile. 

Raphael turned away from Casey wondering if he had any right to think he could make Casey smile with a kiss. 

Maybe a sad one. A smile of pity and apology. A smile that said, Sorry, man. I like you and all. You’re a real pal. Just not like that.

Raphael peeled the lid off of the coffee tin and set a filter into the machine.

“Little early for a coffee break when ya haven’t even gotten started.”

Raphael could have made a joke, he could have scoffed, but he said, “It’s for you,” and his voice was so much softer than he had intended. 

The energy in the room shifted just a bit and Raphael’s heart rate quickened. There were butterflies in his chest - and weren’t they supposed to be in his stomach? But, no, there was definitely discomfort in his chest and he wondered if he was going to have a fucking heart attack having let three words slip with that voice. 

“Oh.” Casey said, and Raphael thought, no, it was Casey’s tone that was set to kill him. “Thanks.”

It was that little word that reminded Raphael it was the holiday for being grateful and he hadn’t told Casey how good everything was, how tasty and cozy and how thankful he was that he got some time away from his brothers. Thankful he had a hot meal with his best friend instead of cold pizza while his brothers argued over which remote they could play with - despite them having assigned controllers since they were kids. 

Raphael struggled to find words that didn’t sound too… too… he wasn’t sure. Too desperate maybe. Too flowery or stupid. 

He didn’t want Casey to think he was poking fun. Because today was impressive and clearly took hours to prepare. Forethought and recipes and care. Planning and trips to the grocery store with intent. Raph wanted to acknowledge that work, but if he did that, he worried Casey was gonna think he’s getting soft. 

They didn't do ‘soft’. They argued and threw punches when things got too much. They joked and called each other out on bullshit. They poked fun at each other. But they never touched an insecurity once it was revealed. And they never pushed when the other wanted to be left alone. 

And apparently they cooked now. Casey cooked. And Raph cleaned. Well, Raph was supposed to be cleaning.

Raph filled the reservoir with water and set the coffee to drip. He put out two mugs on the counter even though he couldn’t stand the taste of the dark roast Casey bought. And he finally turned to the table to grab dishes for scrubbing.

When he added the leftover sweet potato casserole to the half-empty dish of green beans, Raph let slip a small phrase of praise. “This stuff was real sweet.”

“Yeah, it uh, got marshmallow on top.”

“Oh.” Raphael said and too late realized that he shouldn’t have messed up the dish by nesting it inside the dirty dish of green beans. “You got those plastic box things?”

“Tupperware?”

“I guess.”

Casey slid off his stool and grabbed a set from the cabinet. It was neatly organized by shape and size. And Raphael knew that he and Casey would never fit like that. Raph was too messy. He had his own method of organization, but it had never been orderly like that. Even if he wanted to straighten up his room, he wouldn’t know where to start. 

Raph took the container with a hum and spooned the slop into it. Popped on the top and set it aside. “Bet Leo would like it.”

“It wasn’t too sweet?”

“Nah. He, uh, likes that stuff. Always puts extra honey in tea and syrup on pancakes.” 

“What about you? Did you like it?”

“It was alright.” Raph figured that probably wasn’t the best answer, but he didn’t want to lie. The sweet potatoes with marshmallow were too sweet for his taste. But the corn muffins were nice and fluffy, and they tasted enough like butter that he ate them all on their own. And the butternut squash soup Casey made for the first course left him wanting to lick the bowl. 

But how could he tell him that without sounding like he didn’t appreciate everything else. “Everything was good, Case. You, uh, really outdone yourself, y’know?”

Raphael didn’t look at him. Didn’t see the flush upon Casey’s cheeks as he turned to rest his elbows on the counter. He didn’t notice the way Casey twiddled his thumbs and picked at his cuticles. 

“Yeah?”

The dishes clattered in the sink and Raphael drizzled soap over the lot of them. The casseroles had to be hand washed in batches. The sink was too shallow and small to hold everything. And no dishwasher in the apartment. “Sure. Never had anything like that before.”

“The turkey was dry.”

Raphael shrugged his shoulders. He liked the turkey well enough. “It was fine.”

“The beans burned.”

The tops were a little crispy, but Raphael had actually enjoyed the combination of textures. “You watch a lot of cooking shows or something?”

“Huh?” Casey looked up from his hands and over his shoulder to where Raphael washed the dishes. Raph glanced at him with a question in his eyes. 

“You cook real good. Do you watch that cooking channel?”

“Oh. No. The, um, the… there was classes.”

“Ya took cooking classes?” Raphael bit his tongue after he asked, knowing the question came out all wrong. He was impressed, surprised, but the way he said it sounded judgmental and he didn’t mean it that way at all.

“Wasn’t gonna live off take out,” Casey countered. 

And Raph shrugged. That was fair. Casey knew that even Raphael couldn’t stand night after night of fast food. 

Ever since he started getting invited to Casey’s for dinner, Raph looked forward to their meals. Raph just didn’t realize how much work went into things like this. Casey always had everything cleaned up and ready to reheat by the time Raph showed up. Granted, Raph usually showed up around 3 AM with a ravenous appetite and ate all of Casey’s leftovers, but Casey didn’t seem to mind. Today was the first time Raph saw Casey ‘in action’. Slaving away over the burners and checking on the oven. Timing everything just right so nothing went cold while the rest cooked. It was amazing, now that Raph was really thinking about it.

“You think you could teach me sometime?” 

It wasn’t even about cooking down at the Lair. While that would be nice, Raph would probably be roped into making the same thing his brothers always ate. And that didn’t appeal to him. Not really. Not now that Raphael knew there were so many other flavors out there to be enjoyed. 

Truthfully, Raph would have liked to repay Casey with a meal himself. Maybe trade off nights one day. If he ever got good enough to make something edible.

“Teach you to cook? I dunno if you could handle it man. Takes patience and attention to detail.”

“You don’t think I got patience?” Raphael had to laugh, but it was a sad thing. 

He’d been waiting for Casey to notice him for months now. And as far as Raphael could see, Casey was just as clueless to Raphael’s feelings for him as he had ever been. So, Raph waited.

Maybe one day Casey would see him as more than a friend. Maybe not. But friendship was good. Friendship kept them close. Allowed Raph to keep Casey safe when he went out on some harebrained scheme or got it in his head to take on criminals by himself. Raphael could keep an eye on him. As long as they remained friends, Casey would never truly be alone. 

Casey didn’t answer the question, so Raphael didn’t say anything more. 

Raph cleaned the kitchen in quiet until the coffee maker gave one long annoying beep to announce it was done. Raphael rinsed his hands under the water and dried them on the towel tucked into the waistband of his slacks, before going over to pour Casey a cup.

When Raphael brought over the mug, filled to the top, no need to leave room for milk since Casey drinks it black, Raphael sees Casey watching him curiously. 

“I could teach ya a few things, I guess.”

Raphael shrugged and the coffee sloshed dangerously toward the lip of the mug. He carefully set it down on the counter before looking up to meet Casey’s gaze. “The soup. That was my favorite.”

“There’s more in the pot,” Casey offered, standing up, “I could heat some up.”

“Dude, I meant what I said about being full. Everything was good. But, if I had to choose one thing. The soup. And maybe the muffins. So, a’right, two things, I guess.”

“...you’re a muffin man,” Casey teased, easing himself back onto the stool.

Raphael sneered. “Shut the fuck up, Jones.”

With that, the tension in the room broke and Casey went on to poke fun at Raphael as he washed the dishes. “Put your back into it, sweetheart. I wanna see my reflection in that glass.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll make it shine. Maybe then you’ll see you’ve had creamed spinach dryin’ on ya forehead for the past hour.”

“You asshole. Why didn’t you tell me?” Casey rubbed at his forehead, missing the smear, and Raphael bit back his chuckle.

“Green looks good on you.”

Casey’s eyes narrowed at that, and Raphael swallowed hard wondering if he said something wrong. 

The intensity of Casey’s gaze made Raphael want to take a step back and a step forward, and he didn’t know upon which impulse to act. So instead he stood stock still.

When Casey took a step toward him, Raphael was grateful he didn't have to be the one to choose. 

Raph lifted his hand to wipe the smear from Casey’s face, but Casey told him, “Leave it.” Told him, “I like a little green on me.”

Raphael couldn’t hold his gaze at that. “Shit, Jones. Ya can’t say shit like that when ya-” Raphael’s train of thought disappeared into fog when Casey grabbed him by the neck, pulled him forward for a kiss. 

It was hard and fast, and over too soon. Casey pulled back, and Raphael held his eyes shut a little longer, wondering what he’d see when he opened them. Raph held his breath and Casey’s hand tightened around the back of his neck as they each waited for the other to make the next move. 

Raphael’s green eyes opened slowly. “That all ya got?”  And he took Casey’s face with both hands, dragging him into a searing kiss that knocked Casey off-balance in more ways than one. 

[toffrox]

Nightmares

Read on Ao3

Will

"I still can't believe Lou Ellen told you that" Will shook his head at his boyfriend in disbelief.

"Why?" Nico folded his arms, indignant. "We are friends."

Will's head whipped around at that.

"Nico di Angelo, did you seriously just openly admit to having a friend?" He asked. He sounded stunned, though he was grinning.

Nico rolled his eyes and attempted to shrug away, but Will's arm was wrapped firmly around his shoulders. They were wedged in against one another on the floor of Cabin Thirteen, both leaning against the side of Nico's bunk.

The floor around them was littered with Mythomagic cards, junk food and extra blankets. When Nico failed to duck out of Will's grasp he let out a muttered "humph" and leant back against the pile of pillows between them and his bedpost.

"You're impossible" he grumbled.

"What! I am not!" Will laughed, "I'm just proud of you. Such a social butterfly." He pressed his nose against Nico's head and nuzzled teasingly, earning another eye roll from Nico.

"Gross" he muttered.

Will wasn't phased. He could see the way Nico's lips were twitching ever so slightly, giving away his true feelings. Will kept his nose in Nico's hair and brought his hand up to cup Nico's cheek. Nico adjusted slightly so that their eyes met, their foreheads pressed together. Will smiled.

Nico tilted his chin so that they could kiss and Will hummed with pleasure when their lips touched.

The mess of blankets, the flickering light in the cabin and the frantic beating of Will's heart all seemed to melt away as Nico's fingers threaded through Will's hair.

"Nico" Will whispered against Nico's lips. Nico made a soft whimpering sound in the back of his throat that sent shivers down Will's spine.

It was a soft kiss. Comforting and teasing at the same time. Will held Nico close, marvelling for the millionth time at how good it felt to be wrapped up in him. And yeah, maybe also feeling a little smug about how dating someone with a whole cabin to themselves was the best.

"You should stay the night." Nico whispered. Will felt his stomach jolt.

"Really?" He asked, breathless. Nico nodded shyly. "What about… my siblings will notice…" Will said nervously.

"So" Nico shrugged. "It's not like we're doing anything. Just sleeping."

And making out. Will felt his cheeks warm. They were still wrapped up in each other's arms.

"Yeah, Austin's really gonna believe that." Will muttered.

"So what?" Nico said easily. His arms tightened around Will's neck. "I like having you here."

Will gazed down at his boyfriend, marvelling at how comfortable he looked, how open and relaxed.

Will was aware that they hadn't really been friends for that long; just a couple of months. And they'd been dating for even less time. Nico had been through so much, and Will knew there was still a lot Nico hadn't opened up to him about. He always tried to give Nico space; he didn't want to become a crutch for Nico… and yet here he was, telling Will he didn't care what the other campers thought of him, being open about what he wanted… maybe Will didn't need to be quite so cautious all the time…

"You don't have to stay" Nico said softly, worry creeping into his dark eyes. "If you don't want to…"

Will shook his head then, letting himself smile and snuggle down into Nico's arms some more.

"I want to stay" He whispered.

They kissed again, eventually moving from the floor to Nico's bunk. Nico pulled them both under the covers and curled into Will. Their legs tangled together. Nico settled down with his head on Will's chest, both of them smiling.

Nico's eyes had fluttered shut and his breathing had slowed. Will felt himself begin to drift into sleep too, his nose full of the scent of Nico and his chest full of a bubbly kind of happiness that made him giddy.  

—

Will dreamed.

He was standing up on half blood hill, looking down at the camp, bathed in sunlight. There was a gentle breeze washing in from the sea. He could hear shouts of excitement drifting up from the volleyball courts. The sweet scent of the strawberry fields filled Will's nostrils and made him feel calm. He began to walk down the hill and noticed he was barefoot.

He wasn't sure exactly when the dream began to change.

As he approached the bottom of the hill, nearing the forest, he noticed the grass was no longer cool and smooth beneath his feet, but hot and prickly.

The shouts from the volleyball field seemed louder.

Will looked up and noticed that the sky was darkening. The sun had smoldered down into a deep red that stained the horizon.

Will frowned. He looked at his feet and yelped to see the ground was no longer grassy but jagged. He was walking on some kind of riverbed. Except instead of stones or sand his feet were falling onto broken, black glass.

With a horrible sinking feeling in his stomach Will started to realise that the shouts he was hearing weren't from the volleyball court. In fact, it was a single voice. Someone was screaming. Crying. Someone Will knew.

Nico.

—

Will woke up with a lurch.

For a second the dread that had formed in the pit of his stomach remained as Will blinked into the darkness, his brain struggling to locate his surroundings.

Then his senses caught up with him and Will registered the cool moonlight streaming in through high windows, the extinguished torches bracketed against the wall and, eventually, the weight of a familiar form curled up next to him. A form that was twisting and jerking against Will's arms in panic.

Will sat up and pulled back. Nico was still asleep, his face contorted in some kind of pain. As Will's focus shifted to him he had to fight not to reel back at the waves of darkness and fear that were rolling off him.

Will felt his chest tighten in panic. He hadn't witnessed Nico having a nightmare this bad since those first few days in the infirmary. As he fought against the dark aura that seemed to be emanating from Nico he realised that what Will had seen and heard in his own dream must have been a glimpse into Nico's nightmare.

"Nico" Will coaxed, nudging his boyfriend's shoulder as gently as possible. "Nico, you're dreaming."

Nico strained against the hand on his shoulder and Will let go instantly. Nico's face scrunched up and he twisted, moving so his face was lit by the silvery light from outside. Will realised with a painful jolt that there were tears on his cheeks.

"Nico" Will whispered desperately, attempting to swallow his own fear. "Please, wake up."

And then all of a sudden he did. Glassy, dark eyes snapped open and stared at Will for a few confused seconds. Then Nico sucked in a breath and pulled away, curling up in the corner of the bunk and burying his face in his hands.

"No," Nico moaned, his shoulders shuddering. He seemed to be talking to himself, not Will. Will hesitantly touched his fingers to Nico's knee but Nico wrenched himself away, curling in on himself even tighter.

"No, no, no." he mumbled, a bit quieter now, trying hopelessly to keep the tremble out of his voice.

Will stayed where he was, perched on the edge of Nico's bed, his breathing shallow but his heart racing. It took every drop of self-restraint not to reach out for Nico again, but he managed it. He knew Nico needed space.

Nico's shoulders were shaking unevenly. Like he was crying but attempting to hold it back.

"Nico?" Will said. He kept his voice as quiet as he possibly could. "Do you need me to go?" He asked, knowing that his presence was adding to Nico's panic but praying to all the gods that Nico wouldn't say yes. Will knew there was no way he'd be able to walk away from him like this.

Nico jerked his head oddly and Will couldn't be sure if it was a nod or a shake of the head.

"Um," Will began to hesitantly disentangle himself from the twisted blankets. Then Nico's arm shot out suddenly to grab his wrist. Will looked up.

Nico was staring at him, wide eyed. Terrified. Tears still on his cheeks.

"Please stay." He whispered.

Relief flooded into Will with such force that for a second he thought he might cry as well. Instead he finally let himself reach out and pulled Nico to him. Nico curled into his chest. His fingers clutched at Will's collar. Will heard him let out a single sob.

"I'm sorry" Nico said quietly. His voice was muffled from Will's shirt.

"Nico, baby, you have nothing to be sorry for." murmured Will. He wound his arms around Nico's back as tightly as he could, one hand reaching up to stroke his hair.

They stayed like that for several minutes, Nico taking long, shaky breaths until eventually his heartbeat slowed and the tension in his shoulders eased off.

Even then Will's chest ached. What on earth had happened to Nico to make him feel like this? To give him nightmares this terrifying?

Nico still hadn't properly talked to Will about his past, other than to talk about Octavian's death and the almost-loss of Leo.

Will knew bits and pieces of the story from Annabeth and Percy. He knew some parts too from Gleeson Hedge. And he knew that Nico would have to talk about it with him eventually, but he didn't want to push it. It was important to Will that Nico had space to share these things on his own terms. That he had time to look after himself without relying on Will to fix things.

Will hoped he'd made it clear to Nico that he was there to listen whenever Nico was ready. He always made an effort to remind Nico that he wasn't going anywhere; that he would still be here, no matter what Nico had to say.

But they had been dating almost a month now and Nico had never brought it up. And now Nico's past had crept up on them both and put Nico in a position out of his control. Will felt stupid for not having thought about this. Felt ashamed for letting his resolve slip and sleeping in Nico's cabin (so much for giving him space).

Mostly, he just felt worried. And scared at how frightened Nico had been in his dream. How desperately sad he had been when he woke up.

How often did this happen?

What did Nico do when he was sleeping alone?

What if Nico never opened up to him? What would Will do then?

What if he never opened up to anyone…?

—

Nico

Nico took a deep breath with his forehead against Will's chest and then drew back a little, peering up to meet Will's worried gaze.

"I'm ok now." He said quietly. His voice was finally steady.

"Are you sure?" Will frowned.

"Mmm." Nico nodded and released Will's t-shirt from his grasp, moving his hands instead to rest around Will's waist, his fingertips grazing the small of Will's back.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" asked Will. His voice was still soft, careful.

"Not really…" Nico said. He closed his eyes to avoid the way Will's eyes were searching his face. His stomach was still uneasy; he could feel leftover queasiness from the dream about Tartarus.

He knew that it wasn't fair of him to keep avoiding telling Will about this stuff; this wasn't what Will had signed up for when Nico asked him to stay the night… But he just couldn't face thinking about the dream again.

Will sighed."You do talk to someone about this stuff… right?" He prompted gently.

Nico opened his eyes to see Will chewing his lip nervously.

"Of course." Nico said. "I've been talking to that doctor in New Rome over iris message."

Will blinked in surprise.

"You have?" He said.

"Yeah, every week."

At the end of Nico's three day stay in the infirmary, Will had spoken to Nico about the doctor in New Rome (it seemed like years ago now, back when he and Will had barely spent any time together and Nico was still uncertain about whether or not he'd made the right decision to stay at camp). Will had told him that the healers from Camp Jupiter had recommended the doctor for campers who had been on difficult quests. 'It might help,' Will had told him.

"How has that been?" Will asked him now.

"It's good I guess…" Nico shrugged, his voice still quiet. "I don't want to leave camp anymore."

"But you're still having nightmares…" said Will.

"Yeah"

"How often?"

"Will" Nico pulled away slightly, frowning.

"Ok, I'm sorry. We don't have to talk about it." Will said hurriedly, tightening his grip around Nico and attempting (poorly) to cover the worry in his eyes. They stared at each other in silence for a moment.

"I'm just scared, Nico." Will whispered eventually.

Nico flinched. Of course he was scared…

"I'm sorry." Nico hung his head as he spoke, but Will was already shaking his head.

"No, not like that." Will brought one hand up to cup Nico's cheek. "I'm scared for you, Death Boy. I'm scared because you're hurting. And I'm scared that you think that you deserve it. That's all I'm scared of."

His voice was so gentle. Nico's chest ached. He closed his eyes again.

"You wouldn't say that if you knew all the worst things I've done." He said.

Will tightened his hold on Nico and pushed their foreheads together.

"There's nothing you could tell me that would scare me more than the thought that you might never tell me those things" he said.

"Why?" Nico frowned.

"Because I worry that you're hurting yourself by not telling anybody."

Will sounded almost as pained as Nico felt. Nico scrambled for something he could say to comfort him.

"Reyna knows." he said quietly.

"That's good." said Will, sounding equal parts relieved and concerned.

Nico opened his eyes and studied Will's expression carefully. Soon, he knew, he was going to have to share his past with Will. As much as he hated the idea of reliving it… and as much as he worried what Will would think of him afterwards… he knew that he couldn't hide this part of himself forever. He didn't want to.

"I'll tell you one day…" he assured.

"I'd like that." Will smiled.

And Nico thought of Ahklys and of Cupid. He thought of Bryce Lawrence and the looks of horror on Coach Hedge and Reyna's faces when they recounted what Nico had done to him…

He thought of those things as Will smiled.

No you won't.

[rosyredlipstick]

guess who watched high school musical 2 and got caught up in the ryan/chad of it all: a conchell AU

this is pure 100% cheese. thats ur warning. also unbeta-ed.

Spending the entire summer at their mother’s golf resort had sounded like a dream for exactly 3 seconds, until Mitchell remembered the…. Everything about his siblings. 

When he wasn’t pulling Sebastian away from flirting with all their guests and the entire staff, he was lecturing Scarlett and Drew about taking advantage of the concierge service, making sure Stefan and Valentina weren’t spending too much time in the sun and were definitely drinking virgin cocktails, reigning in Lacey and Sophia’s pranks, and making sure Sabrina was happy in her first summer enrolled in the youth program. Oh, and he was choreographing a major number for the end of summer talent show. So. Full plate. 

Still, it was nice he had convinced Will to come along for the summer. While he was one of Mitchell’s official guests, he had quickly befriended the entire young staff in the kitchens and by the poolside. More than often, when they were on their walks around the resort, Will would no doubt be called out to or greeted by grinning teens in red and white polos. 

Mitchell, used to his friend’s sunflower attraction toward attention, smiled knowingly and let it happen without a complaint. At least Will was enjoying himself--he’d been way too stressed about his pre-med program the last few months and, with Mitchell spending most of his time at the resort trying to rein in his power-drunk sibling, he was glad his friend wasn’t spending the summer alone at the poolside. 

Of course, with all his new acquaintances, that also meant that Will’s tendency to interfere with Mitchell’s personal relationships appeared. 

“I’m telling you, you need to hang out with friends more, you’ve been busy all summer!” Will was smiling brightly. “This is the perfect opportunity!” 

“Yes, the perfect opportunity to intrude on a social gathering!” Mitchell protested, “It’ll be weird if I go. You should just go and have fun, don’t worry about me.” Mitchell sighed, “I don’t want them to be uncomfortable! This is their down time, I don’t want to ruin it by being the boss’s kid.” 

Will rolled his eyes, “It’s a baseball game, Mitchell.” 

Mitchell shook his head, final. “Sorry. But I don’t think so. Text me afterward, okay? We can grab ice cream.” Will said nothing. He peeked a look back to the other boy, “Unless there’s something else?” 

Will sighed and looked off to the side as his cheeks colored. “Okay, listen, of course I really want you there because you’re my best friend and everything but also -” 

“There’s a guy.” Mitchell guessed, bored. Will found the love of his life at least once a week. “Who is he?”

Will didn’t even put up a fight. “I’m not sure if you know him. He works in the coffee shop? Pale, dark hair, sharpest cheekbones I’ve ever seen?”

Mitchell thought for a second, “Nico?” He guessed. Nico, for the past few months, has consistently served him the best caramel macchiato he’d ever had every morning. Mitchell dreamt about that drink, on especially good nights.  

Will melted into a dreamy mess. “Yeah. Nico.” 

Mitchell blew a puff of hair up into the hair around his face, “I mean…” He grimaced, “If you need a wingman or something -”

“Yes!” Will was already celebrating, “Thank the gods, thank you! I mean, I think you’ll enjoy yourself at the game and everyone’s really cool, but yes! Okay, if you could just like, set up a really good opportunity for me and Nico to be together like, alone, I’d so appreciate it -” 

Will continued to ramble about the perfect situation Mitchell could set up, including the ideal mood lighting, when Mitchell interrupted him.

"Is Percy okay?" Percy had just rushed by, looking upset, and hopped in his mother’s car without a word to either of them--odd, as he usually offered at least a hey guys! If not a full on conversation that left Mitchell feeling like a better person for having it. It was kind of his thing. 

"Oh, he's in turmoil because he feels like he has to choose between swimming or singing with Annabeth at the talent show and he doesn’t know which to choose." 

“Oh.” 

Will wrinkled his nose, “Yeah, he’s kinda got his own thing going on right now. I saw him dancing by himself in the golf course earlier, but I thought I’d just give him some space.”

“Smart,” Mitchell commented, growing a bit uneasy as they approached the field. There was a crowd already assembled there with a smaller circle throwing a baseball back and forth. As they approached, a few people called out to Will in excitement but it wasn’t until they were faced with a smaller inner group of people that Mitchell was addressed. 

A tall, smirking guy with wild curls was the first to greet him, lightly tossing a baseball into his own mit as he spoke. “Brought a friend, Will?” 

Will smiled brightly. “Yeah! This is Mitchell.”

“Trust me, I know who Mitchell is.” His humor-filled gaze flickered to Mitchell himself. “Nice to finally meet you.” 

Mitchell’s cheeks heated. “You know me?” 

Travis let out a small disbelieving laugh. “Yeah. Yeah, I do.” Travis elbowed the guy at his side, who shared similar curls and features. “And this is my brother, Connor.” 

“Hello, I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced.” Mitchell held out his hand with a smile. “I’m Mitchell. You’re on the staff, here?” 

Despite the incredibly stupid question Mitchell just asked considering Connor’s bright red LIFEGUARD tank top he still wore, Connor was kind enough to nod along with Mitchell’s obvious question, his eyes wide. Mitchell’s hand, still extended out to him, wobbled in the air. 

He was a second away from dropping his arm and shaking it off completely when Connor seemed to realize that he was waiting for a handshake in the first place and nearly dived for it. In his haste, he almost completely tripped over himself and onto Mitchell. 

“Oh, well,” Mitchell caught him before he could take them both down on the dirt field. “Are you okay? Is it too hot or something?” Connor’s face was strangely pale compared to his brother’s, despite the mid-afternoon summer sun. Mitchell resisted the urge to reach out and touch his skin for sun stroke. 

“So hot,” Connor whispered, in his arms. Mitchell stared down at him in concern.

A girl--Katie, maybe--came up beside him and physically took Connor out of his arms, a tight smile on her lips. “This is nothing, he’s just dehydrated.”

“More like thirsty.” A girl across from them muttered.

Katie continued on like no one said anything. “Let’s get some water in you, dude.” 

Will was smiling on like this interaction was completely normal. “So anyway I was wondering if Mitchell could join our game?” 

“Hmm, well this is an employee-only game.” Despite his words, the light tease in Travis’s voice kept Mitchell from getting nervous about the whole situation. “But it does raise the stakes.” 

That Mitchell could work with. His lips stretched out into a wide grin. “Yeah? What were you thinking?” 

Travis clicked his tongue, “How do you feel about being Captain? I take one team, you take the other.”

He thought it over then nodded. “That sounds fair. What’s the prize?” 

Travis shrugged, messing with the baseball in his mit as he spoke. “Any ideas?” 

Mitchell pretended to think, already knowing what he wanted. With a group this size, his choreo could really expand into something great. “If you lose, you guys have to join my dance group for the talent show.” 

“Hmm,” Travis looked to the girl at his side--Phoebe, he thought, another lifeguard. She once helped him with Sabrina’s floaties. “We’ll consider that. Guys?” The circle of employees gathered a bit closer to talk it over. Will shot him an excited look. 

Suddenly, in the midst of their talking it over, Connor burst from the huddle and pushed his way over to Mitchell. “I’ll give you fifty dollars if you let me on your dance team.” 

“Wait, no -” Travis grabbed his shoulders from behind to push him back, “Connor, we’re trying to negotiate with him!” 

“Oh,” Connor nodded seriously and turned back to where Mitchell was waiting, amused. “I’ll pay two hundred -” 

Katie slapped a hand over his mouth and dragged him back to the crowd, him protesting all the way. Travis looked back to Mitchell, tired. “Just ignore him, please.”

Mitchell watched him sink back into the crowd, something small curled at his lips. “I don’t think I can.”

“Anyway,” Katie was the one to speak now. “We talked it over, that sounds fine. If we lose, we’ll be in your show.” 

Mitchell had to resist punching the air in excitement. “Great.” 

Travis leaned back with his arms crossed, looking him over. “And what do we get if we win?” 

“Well, what do you want?” 

“Dinner and a movie,” Connor choked out, almost like he didn’t mean to.

Mitchell raised an eyebrow, “An catered employee afternoon in the movie theatre?” He thought it over, then shrugged. “I could probably arrange that.” 

Travis rubbed at his forehead, “I - sure. Yeah, that sounds fun.” 

“Alright,” Mitchell smiled with a small shrug of his shoulders. “I guess it’s game on, then.” 

...

Of course, against a batch of peers who had been playing baseball all summer, Mitchell was bound to lose. However, they didn’t lose as hard as he expected. 

After the match, when Mitchell was left aching from the game and loss but proud despite it, Will sunk down next to him at the picnic table. “Good game. I didn’t think you’d get so into it.” 

At the last moment, Mitchell had ended up diving for a ball, completely dirting up his outfit. He had caught it, and it had counted, but two players had already made it home in the meantime. Still, it was a close loss. 

Mitchell smiled slightly. “Me neither. But it was worth a shot at a full dance group.”

Will laughed softly, “Still. Great catch.” 

“It really was.” They both looked up at the new voice--Katie, from before. She’d been on Travis’s team with Connor, Jason, Leo, Annabeth and a few others. The rest of the group was mostly dispersed by now, most of them arranging rides home or plans to grab food. “We haven’t had a game that fun in a while.” 

At her arrival, Will stood and offered her his seat. Which was kind, but also definitely just a ploy to escape and run off wherever Nico was lurking. Mitchell waved him off with a roll of his eyes before returning back to the conversation. Katie took his place without a word. 

“Well, I’m happy to help. It was a good time, you guys work well together.” Mitchell shot her a knowing grin. “I’ll start working out the theatre rental. Any movie requests?” 

She shrugged, “We can take a vote on it. But we’ve also been talking.” Katie had an amused twinkle in her eye. “We’re in. We’ll still do your show, it sounds fun.” 

Mitchell sat up completely, a bolt of excitement hitting him. “Wait, really?” At her nod, he absolutely lit up. “Oh my god, it’s gonna be such a fun show, I promise!” He got to his feet in excitement and threw his arms around her shoulders in a hug, pulling away promptly. “Oh my god, wait, I’m covered in dirt I’m so sorry -” 

She waved it off but stood herself. She, too, was covered in dirt from the game so didn’t seem to care much at any additional. 

He couldn’t help but babble on. “It’s going to be so much fun. You won’t regret it.”

She smiled at him, looking like she was indulging him. “I know. Anyway, just a moment,” She disappeared for a few moments only to return, dragging Connor by the wrist. She pushed him toward Mitchell, almost bumping them into each other. “Connor will be your contact point for organizing this. Trade numbers, will you? For planning.”

“Oh, sure!” Mitchell fumbled to get his phone out and hand it over. Connor’s phone appeared under his hand faster than he thought possible. 

Katie left them alone as he punched in his own phone and name, drifting back to where Travis and a few others were waiting. He handed back Connor’s phone, suddenly closer to the other boy than he had realized. He paused. 

“You have grass in your hair.” Connor breathed out. 

“Oh,” Mitchell dipped his head in embarrassment and rubbed at his head. “Oops.” 

“I -” Connor gestured to his own temple. “Other side?” 

He tried but Connor only stepped forward slightly into his space, reaching out slowly. “Let me -” Mitchell felt a slight pull on his hair, not painful. Connor pulled away with a blade of grass in between two fingers. 

“Got it,” Connor said weakly, staring down at him. 

“My hero,” Mitchell teased. Connor nodded gravely at that, like he was accepting a mission.

Connor licked his lips before he spoke. “That was a really good catch. You’re a good player.” 

“Baseball’s just a dance of its own.” Mitchell shrugged, joking. “What can I say? I’m just that much of a star athlete.” Connor nodded, looking like he completely agreed. 

Before either of them could say anything further, Will called out to him and ran their way, grinning, with another guy at his side. “I heard the news! They’re still doing the show, that’s great!” Will was glowing, “See, coming to this was a great idea!” 

Mitchell stuck out his tongue, “You just wanted to brag that you were right.” 

“No!” Will looked behind where he had ran from and lit up, “Actually, I wanted to introduce you to Nico!” 

Nico, who trailed after him a few steps, walked up beside Will with a sarcastic roll of his eyes. Mitchell liked him already. “Next time you’re going to run off mid-conversation, can you at least give me a warning first? I’ll die before I jog after you in jeans.” 

“You’re the one who wore jeans to a baseball game!” 

“And why not? You think I’m gonna participate in this?” 

“Well, you’re an employee at an employee baseball game. Perhaps I thought you were going to play.” 

“Where would you get that idea? Have you not seen the everything about me?” 

“Hi, I’m Mitchell.” He stuck out his hand with a grin. He could sit here all day, truly, but he did have things to do. “You’re Nico?” 

“That’s me.” He raised an eyebrow. “You look familiar.

“Mitchell is one of Aphrodite’s kids. He’s a good one, don’t worry.” Will explained, shooting Mitchell a wince like he didn’t know exactly how his siblings were. 

Mitchell snorted, “On behalf of Drew and Scarlett, I can’t apologize enough.” 

“That… helps.” Nico winced. “I messed up Drew’s chai latte my first day on the job.” 

Mitchell groaned, “Again, I’m so sorry. I’ve been trying to get them to act like, you know, normal people -” 

Nico cut him off. “We work at a golf club. I get more cranky boomers in an hour than an AARP meeting.” Nico shook his head, “They’re a lot, but definitely not the worst customers to have. At least they tip well.” 

He could have wilted in relief. Across from him, Will’s eyes were nearly hearts. God, he was already lovesick. 

Which reminded him --

“Actually, Connor and I were just leaving. We’ll leave you two be.” Mitchell lightly grabbed Connor’s elbow to start steering him away. “Will, can you get a ride home? I’m probably going to be staying late.” 

Next to him, Nico perked up. “Oh, I can give you a ride? If you want? I’ll have to pick up my older sister but, um, it’s not that out of the way -” 

“I would love to.” Will looked perfectly composed, despite the screaming excitement that must be running through his head. He even managed to grab onto Nico’s hand as he led them away toward the parking lot. 

“Young love,” Mitchell commented, shaking his head fondly as the other couple walked off. “Must be nice.” He stepped back and dropped his hand from Connor’s elbow. “Oh, sorry!” He laughed lightly. “Sorry, I was recruited as Will’s wingman and I wanted to give them some time alone. Cute, right?”

Connor’s throat bobbled. “So cute. Um,” Connor made a jerky movement, like he was gonna run his hand through his hair but decided not to. “So you’re, uh, staying late?” 

“Yeah,” He blew some air up into the hair hanging over his face. “If you guys are gonna join the number, I want to have the choreo adjusted for a group before we start rehearsals.” 

“Cool, cool.” Connor nodded slowly, “Cool.” 

Now that he was closer, Mitchell could almost recognize Connor from his many shifts poolside. His lifeguard chair was almost right across from where Valentina would occasionally drag him to tan in the afternoon sun. Didn’t he once help Mitchell apply sunscreen, when Valentina ran to get slushies right when he was reapplying? 

His hands were cold, Mitchell remembered, or maybe his own skin was just that hot. He shivered when Connor applied the first handful of cream on his back. Mitchell had to advise Connor to take some of the sunscreen himself, after his own skin started to stain red. 

He was kind, was the point. Or at least, that’s what Mitchell remembered. 

Mitchell gestured at his parked golf cart as they approached it. “You want a ride anywhere? I’m heading toward the main pavilion.” 

Something wobbled in Connor’s expression before he spoke. “I could, um, go with you?” He said it as a question, looking slightly nervous as he spoke. 

“Yeah, sure! The employee entrance? Did you forget something?” 

“No, no, like -” Connor made another awkward gesture toward nothing. “Like, if you need help with the number? I could come? I mean, it’s never too early to get started on learning the dance, right?” 

Mitchell smiled, “Oh, sure! Do you have experience with dance routines?” 

Connor nodded confidently. “Yes.” 

“Really?” Mitchell turned to him in excitement. “Have you been in any dance groups before?” 

“Um. No.” 

“Oh, so like private lessons or something? A club?”

“Uh. No again.” His confidence was fully wavering now. 

Mitchell raised his eyebrows, “So what experience do you have?” 

“I sometimes dance in my room?” Connor scratched at the back of his head. “I, um. I didn’t think you’d ask many questions, actually.” 

Despite his awkwardness, Mitchell was… charmed by Connor’s fumbling. 

“Um,” Mitchell bit his smiling lip, looking away then back. “Actually, I was supposed to get ice cream with Will after the game.”

Connor deflated before he could finish. “Oh. Okay, yeah.” 

“No!” Mitchell was quick to correct. “I meant like, with Will going off with Nico, I still want to get it. With you. If that’s okay?” 

Connor’s expression bloomed into something so joyful, Mitchell was almost taken back. “I would… adore that.” 

“Adore?” Mitchell couldn’t help but tease. “Why’s that?” 

“I just,” He turned to Mitchell, his eyes wide. “I just really, really like ice cream.”

Mitchell bit his lip, “Me too. I mean, I really like ice cream. Ice cream is… sweet.”

Connor huffed out a small laugh, “Yeah. I, uh, agree.” He made an awkward little motion with his arm at the golf cart. “Um, shall we go?” 

Mitchell stepped forward and looped his arm with Connor’s. “Actually, I thought we could walk?” 

“I will do literally anything you want.” 

Mitchell laughed, “I’ll hold you to that.” 

To Mitchell’s amusement, Connor’s face turned a dark, dark red. He looked away, his lips pressed together in a small excited smile. Perhaps the baseball game hasn’t been such a bad idea.

[athingthatwantsvirginia]

Nora Roberts Shit Like That

PART FORTY-THREE OF THE DO YOU SEE HER FACE? SERIES

Pairing: Jess Mariano x Original Character (Ella Stevens)

Warnings: mentions of depression symptoms, plentiful pop culture references

Word Count: 4.4K

Summary: Ella performs another exercise in spontaneity.

A/N: We've still got the epilogue left, but this is the final regular chapter. Sorry this took so long; endings give me writer’s block. Thank you so much for reading! I have absolutely loved writing this story. I hope you like this chapter! :)

By late May, summer was blooming early and warm and fragrant in Philadelphia. Ella pulled her hair back in a low bun as she padded out onto the terrace. The sun was finally going down, painting the sky a pinkish orange. In the small view of the city past the other apartment buildings, she could see the buildings beginning to light up, tiny and twinkly. Jess was already out there, with a copy of Sharp Objects in hand. He chewed on his eraser, his brows furrowed as he concentrated on the words. There were already chunks of Ella’s messy cursive decorating the pages, and she’d insisted he read it as soon as she finished it the week before. He was already three quarters of the way through.

“This book is fucking crazy, Stevens,” he said as she walked out, not looking up from the text.

“Yeah, cutie. That’s why I like it,” she told him, smiling widely and leaning against the railing next to him.

“So unpredictable,” he deadpanned.

“Whatever, James Dean,” she replied, rolling her eyes and snorting a laugh.

Smirking, he finally shut the book and tossed it back onto one of the mismatched armchairs. Following her gaze, he saw the flaming orangey sun descending behind the cityscape. With the evening light reflected against her freckled face, he could see the green flecks in her eyes when he turned to look at her.

At first, she had not wanted to go to the graduation ceremony at all. She certainly wasn’t walking across the stage in a gown. But, she decided to go for the undergrads she had been the teacher assistant for. They clapped in the auditorium, and went out with Chris, Leo, Matthew, and Mabel to try the new Italian restaurant, which ended up being decent. It wasn’t entirely unceremonious, but there wasn’t much fanfare. Jess didn’t expect Ella to want anything more. She’d ended up finishing her finals a week before the actual ceremony, anyway.

But, still, she was finally done. Chris had even ordered a cake for the table in celebration, despite Ella’s blushy protests. She doubted it would sink in for a while. She was a perpetual student, and was already beginning to feel anxious without steady classwork and homework. But she would start teaching her summer classes in a week or two, and she was planning to fill her time with art and helping out at Truncheon until then.

For the moment, though, she watched the sunset. She felt the night begin to cool down, breezes blowing past her. And Jess could practically feel her relax. Since deciding to take the job at Penn, she’d seemed calmer. He hadn’t realized just how heavily it had been weighing on her until after it was over. She was using vibrant color in her paintings again, which he hadn’t seen in what felt like years. She was coming around to Truncheon after her classes, spending nights with their friends up in the apartment. She was playing music with Leo and running lines with Mabel.

Of course, she still had days when she felt so hopeless about the state of her life, and honestly, the world, that she couldn’t even explain her sadness. But she was working on it. She was trying. It made Jess so proud he almost couldn’t handle it. Watching her, so comfortable in her own skin, made a tiny smirk form on his lips.

As though she could feel his gaze, she suddenly faced him again. “What?”

“Nothing,” he said lightly. “Just looking at you.”

“At me?” she mocked him with dramatic batting of her eyelashes and a breathy voice.

“What can I say? You’re irresistible,” he quipped with a shrug.

She rolled her eyes, trying to brush off the flush rising to her cheeks. “You have to stop saying Nora Roberts shit like that to me.”

“Never,” he shot back smugly.

“Jackass.”

“Nihilist,” he said, then pressed a kiss to her rosy cheek. “A nihilist with a master’s degree.”

“Yeah, it seems that way,” she said, her words a sigh.

“Hey, Stevens,” he began, tilting his head at her a little.

“Yes, Mariano?” she echoed, teasing.

“I’m really proud of you,” he said sincerely.

She bit at the inside of her cheek and smoothed her hands over her simple olive green dress, fidgety and blushing once more. “Thank you. I’m proud of me, too.”

Jess’s smile widened but he felt his heartbeat picking up, stomach churning with anxiety. He felt so wholly content standing next to her, so completely enveloped by love. Dimples and Bette Davis eyes and a loud laugh. So stubborn and passionate and understanding. She was the end and the beginning of everything for him, and he almost felt out of breath at the thought of what was going to happen next. He cleared his throat and ran a hand over his mouth anxiously.

“You okay?” she asked, noticing his uneasiness.

He nodded. “Yeah, Elle...yeah.”

Sighing, Jess decided to bite the bullet, rip off the bandaid. His hands were shaky with excitement. He went over to the suit jacket draped over the armchair behind him. Reaching into his inside pocket, he grabbed the small velvet box. Ella looked on in confusion, as he turned back around and landed on one knee.

A thick shadow of realization crossed her face and her mouth fell slightly agape. “No way.”

“Look, I know you don’t like the big romantic stuff. And please stop me if this all too much of a patriarchal mating ritual for you. But I love you and you love me and we love each other,” he began, looking up at her. He had told himself not to cry, but he was already starting to. With the sunset behind her, Ella looked ethereal and beautiful. “And we’re supposed to be together.”

She rolled her eyes though they were growing tearful, letting out a scoff as he repeated back his own words from years earlier. The night he had tried to get her to come with him to New York flashed across her mind, but her heart didn’t twist in pain at the memory. Instead, it fluttered pleasantly.

“You Hemingway motherfucker,” she whispered through a watery laugh, though she blinked away the tears.

He chuckled breathily, face hot with scarlet color. “I’ll take that one as a compliment. But...I think we should get married. What about you?”

A small giggle escaped her lips before she could help it and she just couldn’t wipe the smile off her face as she spoke. “Y’know, most of the time, I don’t really see the point in getting married.”

Jess’s face fell for only a second.

“But that’s most of the time,” she said. “Not when I’m with you, James Dean.”

After a moment of shock on his face, he scoffed and gave a dramatic groan. “Fuck off, Daria.”

Ella shrugged. “Just thought I should give you a taste of your own medicine,” she told him, smile turning to a smirk. “But, if you still wanna marry me after that one, then I’d love to.”

“Really?” he asked.

“Yes,” she replied. “Really.”

Rising quickly, he enveloped her in a tight hug and kissed her. His lips were gentle and sweet, and almost reminded her of their first kiss so many years ago. Then again, each time he kissed her was pretty much as good as, if not better than, the first time. And, to her surprise, she felt no fear. Something clicked inside her, and she was completely certain. When she pulled away to look at him, she wiped at the stray tears which had fallen on his cheeks.

“I can’t believe you got down on one knee and everything,” she said.

He shrugged humbly. “I try.”

“That you do.”

He looked away from her intense gaze shyly and took a step back, holding the open ring box out to her. “Do you want this ring, by the way?”

“Ah yes! I almost forgot!” she said emphatically. As he had spoken, knelt down, she hadn’t been able to tear her eyes away from his own. Brown and sparkling and kind.

Her breath hitched in her throat as she saw the tiny stone. A polished light purple amethyst shone in the center, and she took it out and slipped the thin gold band over her left ring finger, staring at it. It fit perfectly, and Jess almost couldn’t believe it. After having found it in a tray in the antique store, he’d thought at least some resizing would be necessary.

“I know it’s not huge or anything, but-”

“It’s perfect, Mariano. I mean, it’s fucking lavendar,” she said, flabbergasted.

Jess smirked a tiny smirk. “Yeah, well, lavender is for luck.”

.   .   .

Sat at the island with a paper open in front of him, Jess munched on his cereal. He couldn’t help the smile which was constantly tugging at the corners of his mouth. They were getting married. In all honesty, he hadn’t been entirely sure she would say yes, given her aversion to most things traditional and romantic. Then again, she had certainly seemed to come around to his idealist ways as of late, at least a little bit. And he’d wanted to do it the way it was usually done, on one knee with a ring box open in his hand. He didn’t know exactly what had possessed him to do so, but he was glad. She deserved something normal, something just the right amount of sweet.

Padding on bare feet, Ella waltzed towards the kitchen wearing nothing but one of Jess’s t-shirts, body and mind light from the night before. The early sunshine of the morning bathed the apartment in a sparkling golden glow, made more beautiful by their own joy, it seemed. On her finger, she wore the ring, still new and foreign. But she felt her heart speed up a bit every time she looked down at it. She, too, had been surprised at the way he’d proposed. But, somehow, it managed to feel perfect. It wasn’t over-the-top, but it felt like Jess. Earnest and charming.

He didn’t hear her, too engrossed in his reading, until she pressed a kiss to the top of his head on her way by. He winked at her when they made eye contact, and she rolled her eyes playfully in response as she put on some tea and coffee.

“Hey, Jess?” she asked, leaning over the counter across from him, mimicking their days at Luke’s Diner.

“Hm?” he said, looking up from the news with eyebrows raised.

“Do you wanna get married?” She bit at the inside of her cheek, slightly anxious.

“Well, considering I just proposed to you yesterday, I’d say yeah, I wanna get married,” he replied, teasing and slightly confused.

“No. I meant today,” she continued.

He chuckled a bit, but then saw she was serious. “Today?”

A smile blossomed on her face and she shrugged. “Yeah. Why not? Let’s just go down to the courthouse. We could call up Chris and everyone, to see if they wanna be our witnesses. ”

He gave a surprised scoff, raising his eyebrows. “Pretty spontaneous of you.”

She shrugged, a small smirk on her lips. “I learned from the best. I mean, do you really wanna spend all that money? I don’t really care about having a wedding. The whole tradition seems pretty antiquated to me, anyway.”

“Agreed,” Jess replied, nodding. “Except, what about Luke and Lorelai? And Lane?”

“I mean, we’ve all been to weddings. They’re pretty much the same every time. We can send them a card or something. I just wanna do it, Mariano,” she said, eyes wide and starry with excitement. “I don’t wanna wait. I mean, we’ve been together, more or less, for like, seven years.”

“Minus about four years in the middle there,” Jess pointed out, chuckling.

She rolled her eyes playfully. “Like you weren’t pining for me that whole time, loverboy.”

“Hypocrite,” he shot back. “You really wanna do this””

“Abso-fucking-lutely,” she said, with the most certainty possible. It made Jess so happy he almost wanted to start crying.

“You sure you don’t wanna plan it out and everything? I know how much you love planning,” Jess said. His heart was racing in his chest at her proposition. But, he was waiting for her to second-guess it, for her feet to turn cold. He didn’t want her to doubt her decision later, even if the idea of marrying her immediately made him beyond ecstatic.

“I love you more, though,” she said. “But I only want to do it if you want to also. What do you say, James Dean? Is today our wedding day?”

His smile grew, and he was practically beaming. “Yeah. It is.”

.   .   .

After a couple hours waiting on cold, hard wooden benches in the lobby of the courthouse, with Chris snapping as many pictures as possible on his fancy camera (which he bought inexplicably) and Mabel fussing over whether she had done Ella’s makeup well enough, the six of them stood in the air conditioning of the courthouse’s makeshift chapel. In her hands, Ella held a bouquet of thirteen yellow daffodils Jess had picked up from the supermarket on the way. Her stomach was doing flips, her smile was beginning to hurt her cheeks. Despite the spontaneity of the decision, she was beginning to feel like she had been waiting forever. The period after arriving at the courthouse when Leo had to sweet talk one of his friends from high school, who worked as an administrator at city hall, into giving them a marriage license without the customary 24-hour delay had been agony. But they had pulled it off.

They had all made an effort to look presentable, though Ella could hear her mother’s voice in the back of her mind calling them ragamuffins. Jess wore a simple white button-down with black pants, along with his only pair of real leather shoes and a belt to match. Over it, he wore the suit jacket Ella had been so shocked to see him in when she’d first come to Truncheon’s open house. No tie, of course. The only white dress Ella owned was covered in a pattern of black flowers, and she found the traditional sentiments about virginity behind white dresses to be troubling, to say the least. Instead, she opted for a plain navy blue dress with spaghetti straps, made from satin. It was the fanciest piece of clothing she owned, bought for a party at Truncheon two months earlier that had ultimately been cancelled due to a phantom March blizzard. If she had known at the time that it was to be her wedding dress, she would have laughed in disbelief.

On her feet were her old black ballet flats. She felt as though not wearing them would violate old time’s sake. Her hair was curled and pinned half-back. Her makeup was minimal, with small winged black eyeliner and muted pink lip gloss, a little less than she would have done on herself. But Mabel had practically squealed with delight when Ella asked her to put together the wedding look. Her heart swelled at the sight of Matthew and Chris standing behind Jess, and the thought of Leo and Mabel behind her. After so long feeling out of place, Ella thought she was exactly where she was supposed to be, with the exact right people. If she didn’t know any better, she would have called it destiny. But, at the idea, she wanted to roll her eyes at herself. It was Jess’s job to pull out the Hemingway bullshit.

Jess. As he stood across from her, she could see the ghost of the boy she’d met at the diner back when she was a frustrated high schooler. Back when he had been an angry kid. She thought of love at first sight, and how silly it was, and how whole-heartedly he believed in it. A jewel of fondness sat warmly in her core, and her eyes shone brightly with affection. Even back then, he had given her some sort of lively joy when her world was flat, filled with monotony, drudgery, grief. He had shown her how life could be, if she stopped holding onto her pain so tightly. And she liked to think she had shown him a thing or two, as well.

He looked so grown up. Still, it often struck her how much he had changed. The stubble on his jaw, the slight crinkles at the corners of his eyes when he smiled his slightly crooked smile, or, of course, smirked. His more respectable haircut and his more mature way of dressing. But there would always be a part of him that was exactly the same as it always had been. The foundation that sometimes cracked but never crumbled. The two of them against the world. She thought, not for the first time, of how wholly she trusted in him, more than she ever had before. He felt safe. She felt like she had known him for all eternity. And she felt so sure of marrying him that it was staggering. She swallowed thickly as the officiant gave his dull spiel about legal commitment, which he probably gave to some hopeful young couple every day. Blinking back the happy tears, willing them not to fall and ruin the makeup Mabel had worked so hard on, Ella did as the officiant said and passed her bouquet to Leo behind her. She and Jess joined hands. For some reason, the gesture seemed a bit cheesy, but she did it anyway, not without a sardonic smirk. He gave her fingers a squeeze of reassurance, winking at her, reading her expression expertly. She almost snorted a laugh, but bit the inside of her cheek to stop it. The officiant asked who would like to say their vows first, and Ella immediately spoke up.

“I will,” she said, looking over at the man and then back into Jess’s eyes. “You’re the writer here and I have no interest in following whatever you’re gonna say.”

Jess laughed a little, along with the rest of them, and nodded. He took in a deep breath, still shocked at what was happening. For the life of him, he could not remember a time he had ever before felt so content. The small, nagging voice in his mind told him he didn’t deserve her. She was perfect, after all. But then, she wasn’t, was she? She was stubborn and pessimistic and sometimes stuck in her ways. He loved those things about her, too, even if he sometimes didn’t like them. He had loved her the moment he saw her, and still did, even after finding her flaws. And she loved him, even after finding his. The thought made the voice in his head go completely quiet, for the first time in a very long time. The broken pieces of the puzzles which made them up just happened to fit together exactly, and that was all that mattered, he decided. And he wasn’t scared. He wasn’t nervous about her falling out of love with him. He wasn’t worried about her realizing he wasn’t enough. Instead, he felt complete. He felt ready.

Ella cleared her throat, biting the inside of her cheek again. Then, after taking a moment to compose herself, she began: “So, here we are, Mariano. I’m really happy we decided to do this today, but that means we didn’t have time to plan what to say beforehand. And, like I said, you’re the writer here. So, I’m just gonna try my best...like we always do. We try for each other. I promise I’ll keep trying forever. Because there’s not been one second since I met you that I haven’t wanted to be with you. I miss you whenever you’re gone, even if you’re only gone for a minute. Even when I fucking hate you, I want you with me. Because you are the only person who’s ever made me feel like I’m home.”

Pausing for a moment, she blinked back her tears again. And she disentangled one of her hands from his, to wipe away the dampness on his cheeks with her thumb. His face reddened with embarrassment, but still, the small smile was ever-present on his lips. She clasped her hand in his once more, and continued.

“I love you, simple as that. I didn’t even believe in love when I met you. But then you came and fucked that mindset up royally. You gave me a bed when I was drunk, and you wrote notes in the margins of my books, and you showed me the Hudson River. And a million other things. I have never known a person who is more kind and intelligent and generous and thoughtful. And such a smartass,” she added, and everyone laughed.

She shrugged playfully, and squeezed his hands in return. “You’re the fucking best. You’re it, cutie. I know you know how I feel about that hopeless romantic bullshit you’re partial to. And I never thought I’d believe in soulmates. But, today, with you, I do. Because you’re mine, James Dean. And I’m yours. You once told me we belonged to each other, and I think that’s true. So, why not make it official in the eyes of the law?”

Again, they laughed. But Jess had to choke back more crying at her words. And he had to prepare himself for what he knew was coming. She had always been the better public speaker. He was so nervous he could barely contain himself, despite her beautiful vows. In fact, maybe even because of them. She wasn’t the writer, but she’d pretty much nailed it, he thought. For a fleeting moment, he felt sick from the anxiety. What if he fucked it up? But, again, she squeezed his hands.

And he felt more sure of himself as the officiant passed the torch to him. He cleared his throat, sniffed, and met her ardent hazel gaze. At once, he felt like it was just the two of them.

“I may be the writer, Stevens. But in just a minute everyone will see why I didn’t go into public speaking,” he began. She shook her head a little at him and giggled, urging him to go on. “When I came back to Stars Hollow for my mom’s wedding, all I could think about was you. You were everywhere in that town, even when you weren’t. I wanted to tell you how much I loved you, and I didn’t know how. Granted, the plan I came up with to tell you definitely wasn’t the best. But, while I was there, Luke gave me this book to help me...learn about open communication.”

She let out another laugh and her cheeks were mirthful roses.

“Hilarious, I know,” he deadpanned, and she kept giggling. The sound made his grin widen. “Anyway, I’ll spare you the details, even though you’ve been asking me for them for years. I always wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. Pretty much since the minute I saw you, honey. Even if you can’t relate to that Hemingway stuff, as you so eloquently put it. But there was one part in the book that made me decide to tell you. The narrator’s talking about the divorce of these two middle-aged tragedies named Philip and Judy. The narrator says Philip would have figured out how much he loved Judy if he had asked himself a few questions.”

Pausing, he averted her gaze for a moment. “I can’t believe Luke isn’t here to see me put this shit in my vows. I’m sorry, Eleanor.”

She chuckled through the happy tears welling in her eyes. “It’s okay, cutie. It’s perfect.”

He cleared his throat, nodding slightly. Taking his hands out of her grip, he reached into his jacket pocket to pull out an old, folded book page. He opened it, looking down, and began once more. “He should have asked himself the following questions: ‘Whose phone calls or visits are never unwanted or too long? Do you see her face? Who would you most like to have in your life to ward off moments of loneliness? Do you see her face? When you travel, who would make your travels more enjoyable? Do you see her face? When you’re in pain, who would you most like to comfort you? Do you see her face? When something wonderful happens in your life, with whom would you first want to share the news? Do you see her face? Whose face appears to you?’”

After the recitation, he folded the piece of paper back up and tucked it inside his jacket.

“Did you keep that this whole time?” she asked, blurting out the question before she could stop herself. She was overwhelmed with affection at the gesture, and for the moment, she could see no one else besides Jess as he stood across from her.

“Yeah, I ripped it out before I gave the book back to Luke,” he explained, lowering his voice, conspiratory.

She laughed. “Thief.”

He shrugged, unaffected. “Que será, será.”

Stifling another laugh, she nodded and composed herself. “Just checking. Go on.”

He retook her hands gently. His joking air disappeared and all at once, he was feeling the full weight of his emotion again. Clearing his throat, he hoped to ward off the shake in his voice. “I saw your face every time, Elle. Every single time. I wanted you to be that for me, and I wanted to be that for you. Because you’re beautiful, and you’re brilliant, and you’re the most unselfish person in the world. And I don’t want to spend one more second not married to you.” Then, after taking a deep breath, he finished: “Eleanor Stevens, I have been in love with you since I was seventeen.”

A smile so wide it hurt her spread across Ella’s face. She shook her head at herself as she began to cry just a little harder. Before she could think to say anything else, she pulled him in to place an affectionate kiss on his lips.

“Hey, we’ve still got a few paragraphs to get through, kids,” the officiant scolded them gruffly, though not unkindly.

Images of a flannel-clad diner owner back in Connecticut appeared in Ella’s mind. She caught Jess’s gaze, and he seemed to be thinking the same thing. She bit her lip, and then put her head to his shoulder, laughing loudly. His arm wrapped instinctively around her waist. Standing there, leaning on each other, they shook happily with messy giggles.

[ray-jaykub]

Dummy fucking copy and paste wtf. -your past self

Ok. First of all, me, yku are a major butt-head but thank you for the advice

@brightlotusmoon i wanna apologize for this taking forever. You didn' deserve that and you are just so sweet and kind and super duper patient with me and my heart melts. i wanna apologize that it's so corny and short :(

Life had been going great! You had six amazing friends, albeit four are turtles, and a well paying job. Your apartment was comfortable, the rooms able to hold reasonable furniture and you could dance in the kitchen without a problem. A beautiful rug you had saved up for the longest time laid on your living room floor. A myriad of flowers sewn in and wonderous burgundy. It was the one thing you were most proud of.

So you can imagine the horrible disappointment you felt when you came home to the place flooded. A main pipe had burst under the sink and the floor was completely unvarnished, the rug stripped of it's natural dye and now dull. It had taken so long to get your stuff cleaned up and the landlord had to tell you to leave till things were fixed. That's how you found yourself rubbing at your temples on the four terrapin's couch with the youngest comforting you.

"Come on dudette, it's gonna be fine." Michelangelo hate seeing you this sad, the irritated and stressed look on your face yanked at his heart strings.

"Mikey, my rug is ruined and my floor is trashed. How can it be fine?" You gave him a stern look but soften when you saw the sad look on his face. You felt bad for snapping at him.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have snapped at you. You're just trying to help." His bright smile came back fast. He jumped up and looked down at you. A sly smile on his handsome face.

"Maybe I can distract you." Mikey always had a playful charm. It made him fun to be around and he could always make you smile. You'd trust him with anything.

"I'm listening?" His smile grew wider.

---

Your cheeks hurt from being stretched and you could barely breathe. Tears were forming in yours eyes as mikey huffed with laughter. You couldn't keep it in anymore as you spit the water all over the floor, some coming up your nose.

"HAHA! Mikey:1, y/n:0" he did a silly victory dance as you were shaking with laughter.

"No fair, you're laugh's contagious!"

"Yeah I didn't even start and you were already about to burst." Your face felt like it was splitting from how hard you were smiling but you both fell silent as leo came into the kitchen

"Mikey, Dad says it's time for bed. Y/n sleeps with you tonight." You turned to look at Mikey

"Ok, night Lee." Leo wished you both sweet dreams and left you both. Mikey was already grabbing some rags to mop up the water you spit out.

"You wanna pick a movie to watch while I get the bed ready?" Your face felt hot at the idea of laying with Michelangelo. For the longest time you've liked him and never did you think the time would come for you to sleep in his room.

"Sure, you're ok with me sharing the bed?" He stopped to look up at you, his face a darker green.

"Yeah angelcakes, I'm sure you're really soft." He mumbled the last part more to himself. Praying you wouldn't be uncomfortable but you just nodded and went to his room.

Mikey stood in the doorway of his room admiring the sight before him. You sat in your cute pajama shorts and had stolen an old shirt of his to wear for the night. Your face in thought between the two movies and which to watch.

"We can watch both if you want." You jumped at the sound of him unexpected. A shy smile graced your features as you looked down at yourself.

"Sorry for taking your clothes."Mikey shook his head quickly and came to sit beside you.

"Nonono angelcakes, I think it looks a whole lot better on you then me." With that both your faces flushed. You handed him both movies as a way to ask him which he wanted.

"I like the sound of 'Treasure Island', don't you?"

Finally you both had settled into bed and the movie was dull for your tired brain. It felt like you had shut your eyes for a second but when you opened them, the tv was off save for a night light and you felt Mikey wrapped around you. His breath against your neck was a comfort as his hand laid splayed on the skin of your stomach, the shirt having rose up in the night. Your shuffling must've woken him up because he tightened his grip and had you turn to face him.

Mikey's eyes were heavy and he held a tired smile. He kept his arms around you and tucked his legs around you. Both your noses were a hair away from eachother.

"What are you doing still awake?" Mikey's voice was barely a whisper.

"I wanted to spend more time with you." You don't know why you said that. Maybe it was the sleep or maybe it's the way the nightlight shown over his face. Either way, he tsked at that and kissed the tip of your nose.

"Go back to sleep and we can confess in the morning." With that he tucked his head into your neck and left another kiss. Your heart raced but being pressed into his plastron with his strong arms wrapped around you helped with dozing off.

"Wait- confess?"

[cali-holland]

Learn To Be Lonely, Ch. 1: Chance Encounters

Tom Holland X Reader, Soulmate!AU

In a world where two souls are destined for each other, is it possible to find love when your other half has passed- or are you truly destined to have a lonely heart forever?

Word Count: 3400

Learn To Be Lonely Masterlist

Masterlist   Tom Holland Masterlist

*gif is not mine*

~~~

Kingston Upon Thames. It sounded so foreign to you, and yet it was now your new home. Three weeks ago, your whole life was in New York with your best friend, Kate, but then you lost your soulmate, the soul destined to be with you. It was then that you realized your life would never be complete if you simply kept waiting for the other vagabond soul searching for yours; no one could complete your life now, no one except for you.

Now, your life was in England- Kingston Upon Thames to be exact. Normally, you’d be scared out of your mind to move to an alien land, you’d never make such an impactful decision so quickly; but that was the old you, the lost girl still searching for her soulmate. You were living a new life now, a free life, because you weren’t just living for yourself anymore, you were living for your soulmate that wasn’t. Today was the big day of this new life, the day that you’d move into your new apartment, the day that you’d meet your new roommate, the day that your new soulmate-less life would begin. Though Kingston was an unfamiliar place to you, a strange land of tea and British accents, it already felt like home. Something about it drew you in, as if you were fated to be there- it also helped that your company was international and you were able to transfer to the London office. Sure, it’d be a commute, but nothing you weren’t used to.

“You sure about this?” Kate asked you. Standing on the sidewalk outside of the apartment complex, you both fiddled nervously with your luggage. You had packed up as much as could in your two suitcases and a few packages of some more of your things were currently getting shipped overseas to your new home. Your New York apartment was small anyway, so you didn’t have much stuff to bring over; and you were grateful that your new roommate, Daisy, had been so welcoming about you two sharing items in the apartment. You had never met her in person, but she seemed like a respectful roommate and a responsible person; you hoped she was those things in real life.

“Yep,” You nodded, letting out a small breath. You scratched your wrist lightly, the mark was still burning from weeks ago. Looking over at your best friend, you laughed, “I’ve already signed the lease.”

“True.” She shook her head. It was too late for you to back out now. You took a deep breath and opened the complex’s front door. Holding it open for Kate, she stepped in first and you followed after her. It wasn’t anything special, a simple small entryway, the same as any apartment back home would be- you stopped your thoughts, this was your home now, not New York.

You and Kate made your way over to the narrow staircase. Before you could process what had happened, someone came bounding down the stairs in a hurry, knocking into you harshly. In a flurry, his hands grabbed your waist to keep you from falling over completely.

“I’m so sorry, my bad.” The stranger said, steadying you. As you looked into his warm brown eyes, you forgot for a moment what was happening; you forgot all about your nerves over this move, about your other half being gone. Something about this stranger felt… like home…

“It’s alright.” You replied as he dropped his hands from your waist.

“You’re a long way from home, aren’t you?” He laughed a little, immediately picking up your American accent.

“Not anymore.” You nodded down to the suitcase in your hands.

“Welcome to Kingston then, darling.” He smiled, and you felt an urge to check your wrist, but you knew it was no use. Your mark was faded, there was no way this beautiful stranger could possibly be your soulmate- the universe had already decided your fate, and it was to be alone. “Well, I should get going. Good luck on the move.”

Without another word, he left the complex. Kate smiled softly at you; she knew how much you were hurting without a soulmate, how much you still would like to find that extraordinary love. Your fingers lightly traced over your faded mark. For the first time since your birthday, it wasn’t burning.

The two of you continued your way up the stairs and followed the blue and grey carpet down to the last apartment in the hallway. The navy door had a gold ‘16’ posted on it, and you reached into your jeans pocket, pulling out the little silver key. Kate smiled encouragingly at you as you unlocked the door. You pushed the heavy door open, stepping inside the apartment. There was a long hallway that served as an entryway, with a small shoe rack nestled in beside the door.

“Hello?” You called out into the abyss. You had told Daisy that you were on your way, and you had hoped you weren’t disrupting her. You walked further into the apartment with Kate following behind you. You stopped in the kitchen, taking in the perfectly spotless room, granite counters seemingly untouched and dark mahogany cabinets shining. With a single teapot sitting on the stove, nothing was out of place. A small wood table sat in the nook with four chairs around it, all of it matching the cabinets in the kitchen. The living room, fitted with a couch, coffee table, desk, and entertainment center, connected the kitchen to another hallway, which had four closed white doors down it.

“You’re here!” A voice came from the first closed door in the hallway, and it swung open to reveal Daisy. Her curly brunette hair framed her face perfectly as she came into the kitchen, an warm, inviting smile on her face. A tall blond followed her out of what you assumed was your bedroom; he offered you a much more timid, but still welcoming smile. “I’m so happy to finally meet you. I’m Daisy, but you already knew that.”

“Y/N, but you knew that too.” You smiled at her eagerness. You pointed over to Kate, “This is Kate, she’s here for moral support.”

“Nice to meet you.” Your friend held out a hand to Daisy, who took it happily.

“This is Harrison. You’ll see him around a lot.” Daisy laughed and he stepped forward to give you and Kate polite handshakes. As he shook your hand, you saw the full heart on his wrist, matching Daisy’s own wrist. 

“So, um, this is the kitchen, obviously. You’re welcome to use whatever you’d like. As long as you clean the dishes and don’t break anything, I’m pretty much fine with you using my dishes. I have more than enough anyway.” Daisy explained.

“Why don’t you show her her room before starting on the kitchen?” The boy asked with a laugh.

“My bad.” She laughed, “I’m excited. Come on, I’ll show you your room.” She led you and Kate through the living room and down the hallway. She explained how the first door on the right, the one she had emerged from was hers, the master bedroom with an en suite bathroom. The door right beside hers was just a small laundry room and glorified linen closet. The door on the left served as your bathroom, with blue and white tile lining the walls. She opened the door at the end of the hall- your room.

You smiled, stepping into what was now yours. A large queen size bed sat in the middle of the room; it didn’t have sheets, but the mattress looked welcoming enough. There was a small black nightstand beside the bed, accenting the black bed frame. It wasn’t much, but you knew you’d need to go furniture shopping anyway- there was no way you were paying to have your old New York furniture shipped to England. You found yourself looking out the window that gave you a beautiful view of the bustling street below you.

“A few of your packages showed up early, so I set them in here.” Daisy stated, pointing out the few boxes in the corner.

“Thank you.” You set your suitcases down beside your bed, already knowing you’d have to start with unloading your sheets if you wanted a decent place to sleep tonight. Kate had one more night at the hotel before her early flight tomorrow morning. You were thankful that she managed to fly out with you to help you adjust to your new life, but she couldn’t afford to miss much work.

“Well, I’ll let you get settled in then. Let me know if you need anything.” Your new roommate smiled at you and Kate one last time before she left your room. You began to unzip your suitcase, seeking out your bedding, as Kate opened the boxes in the corner.

“She seems nice.” Kate said, grateful for a good impression of your roommate. She lowered her voice so that Daisy and Harrison couldn’t hear, “Maybe Harrison’s got a hot solum friend.”

“Please,” You chuckled, shaking your head at her. You pulled out the pearl colored sheets from your suitcase and began to make your bed. “You know solums aren’t supposed to move on.”

“Y/N, you have nothing to move on from. Give yourself something to move on to.” She spoke softly. You knew your friend wasn’t trying to hurt you, but, between your wrist beginning to burn again and the truth in her words, you felt a twist of pain in your heart.

“I’m going to live my life for myself, not for anyone else. I don’t have a Leo like you do.” You stated, trying to convince yourself of your own words. No one was going to live your life for you; you had to live it for yourself now.

“Hey,” Kate came over to you and pulled you in for a tight hug, “I’m proud of you for all of this. You’re the strongest person I know, and I’m so lucky to have you as my best friend. You’re going to do amazing out here.”

“Thanks. I’m going to miss you so much.”

“I’ll miss you, too.”

You barely slept that night. Jetlag mixed with the new timezone, your body was already rejecting its new schedule. The new bed was comfortable, but the bare walls made the room feel cold and unwelcoming. With only the nightstand in your room, most of your clothes remained in your suitcases and boxes- with the exception of the clothes that you could hang up in the closet with the few hangers you had managed to ship over. It felt more like a sad hotel room than a new bedroom, but still it was home and it was a work in progress. You go up early, only having slept about an hour, to see Kate off at the airport. After tearful goodbyes and promises to call each other often, she left and you were alone in England.

By the time the cab had dropped you off at your apartment complex, your watch told you it was 7 AM, as in 2 AM New York time. You needed sleep, but you also needed to go out and shop for furniture today. Pulling out your phone, you searched for the nearest Starbucks because, while you now lived in Kingston, you were still searching for an American coffee, even if that meant settling for a Starbucks drink. Once you found one just a couple blocks away, you made your way over there. Stepping inside, you weren’t surprised to see the place practically empty, save for the few employees working and the two people waiting for their drinks. After going through the motions of giving the cashier your order and paying for the warm drink, you stepped aside to wait for your drink to be served.

“Hey, you’re the American.” A voice laughed lightly from beside you and you looked over to see the same stranger from the apartment complex just yesterday afternoon.

“That’s a nice nickname that applies to so many people.” You joked, smiling at his effort.

“So, how did the move go?” He asked.

“It went well. My new roommate’s a sweetheart, so I think we’ll get along well.” You replied. You weren’t sure why you were telling a stranger this, but something was drawing you to him. “I’m Y/N, by the way.”

“Tom.” He smiled, holding out his hand for you. When you touched hands, you felt an odd sensation surge from your wrist. It wasn’t burning in pain anymore; instead a dull vibration was sent up your arm to your heart. You didn’t physically react to it, but you wondered if Tom had felt that. Your eyes scanned your wrist quickly, just to lead you back to the faded half a heart mark. You glanced over at Tom’s wrist, wondering what his mark was like, but it was covered by a perfectly placed watch. Whatever his mark was, he sure didn’t want anyone to know.

Before either of you could say anything more, the barista called out his name and his order. He stepped forward and grabbed the warm, white cup.

“I’ve got to go, but maybe I’ll see you around, Y/N.” He smiled at you one last time, before he left the coffee shop. You stood there, trying to hold back the butterflies in your stomach, as you waited for your own drink. As your wrist began to burn again, it reminded you of just how useless it was to ponder on the beautiful brunette boy that you kept running into; you were fated to be alone and you had to learn to be lonely.

~~

When you returned to your apartment, you started to organize your room a bit more. You sat on your bed, the only place to sit in your room, and wrote out a list of things you knew you’d need: dresser, extra hangers, desk, desk chair, lamp, trash can, bookcase (you weren’t even sure about that one). It felt strange to be writing out such a mundane list of things you needed, things that you already had at your old apartment. It was going to be near impossible for you to complete your room on your own.

“Good morning.” Daisy greeted you with her warm smile as you came into the kitchen a few hours later. She was pouring herself a cup of tea from the silver teapot on the stove while Harrison ate a plate full of eggs at the kitchen table.

“Morning.” You replied, even though it had been morning for you for the past several hours. You paused, realizing you had forgotten where the cups were in the kitchen. Sheepishly, you asked, “Where are the cups again?”

“Here.” Your roommate opened the cabinet closest to the fridge. It was full of cups, mugs, wine glasses- she even had champagne glasses in there. You were surprised she had lived alone, or relatively alone, before you.

“Thank you.” You grabbed a glass and filled it up with water.

“How was your first night here?” She asked, blue eyes filled with tender excitement.

“Didn’t sleep well. I think it’s from the time change.” You answered, shrugging hopelessly, “It’s alright. I’ll get used to it.”

“Is New York five hours behind?” Harrison piped up after swallowing a large forkful of eggs. You could already tell that maybe you wouldn’t share groceries with Daisy because he’d most likely eat them all anyway.

“Yeah it is. So it’s 5 AM for me right now.” You laughed lightly as you eyed the large clock on the wall.

“Do you need any help getting settled in? Haz and I don’t have any plans today.” Daisy offered.

“Oh, no, it’s fine. I was just going to go find an Ikea or anywhere I could get furniture.” You didn’t want to make her feel like she needed to help you. She was already the sweetest, most hospitable roommate you had ever had.

“Let us help. Besides, Haz needs to go to Ikea for his own flat. And you don’t have a car. I can drive.” She insisted. You paused for a moment- you had completely forgotten that a car would be incredibly helpful with furniture shopping. You’d need to figure out the roads here before you could even think about buying a car.

“My flatmate owes me a new bookcase.” Harrison chuckled, “He’ll probably join us, too, if that’s okay.”

“You’re offering to help me settle in here, of course I don’t mind if he comes.” You replied.

Less than a hour later, Daisy parked her large SUV at Ikea and the three of you got out of the car. You thanked her for the ride as she casually slipped her hand in Harrison’s. You felt a small wave of pitiful envy come over you; you once yearned for something as simple as that, but that wasn’t a part of your life now.

“My friend will be here soon. He’s at an appointment right now.” Harrison said as the three of you walked into the large store. Daisy sent her boyfriend a sympathetic smile, making you wonder just what the “appointment” was to get such a reaction from her.

“You got your list?” Daisy asked you, her usual bright smile back on her face.

“Yeah, I feel like I’m going to need to buy a lot today.” You laughed, looking at the small piece of notebook paper you had brought with you, various black pen written over it for things you deemed essential, not-so-essential, would-be-nice-if-you-had-it, do-they-even-have-it-here, and ask-daisy-if-they-have-it.

Walking through the various showrooms, you tried to find the best items for your new home. You had drifted away from Daisy and Harrison a little bit, as they got caught up looking at bookshelves for his apartment. You walked into a relatively empty showroom and your eyes wandered the room for anything interesting. Your gaze stopped on a beautiful black dresser; its woodwork matched your bedroom almost perfectly.

“Y/N?” You pulled away from the enthralling dresser by someone calling out your name. You looked over to see Tom standing only a couple feet away from you in front of a tall, black bookcase that accompanied the dresser.

“Tom, three times in twenty-four hours. Are you stalking me?” You joked.

“Damn, so the bushes weren’t that good of a hiding spot then.” He teased, making you laugh. He came over to stand beside and he looked over the dresser before his chocolate eyes found yours. “Apartment didn’t come with a dresser?”

“Sadly, no. I’m living pathetically out of a suitcase.”

“I’ve got this same one at my place. It’s good and not that expensive, too.”

“How often are you shopping at Ikea?” You laughed, but taking a mental note that you’d most likely be getting this dresser- it was perfect for your room before Tom had even said anything.

“Not that often, actually.” He shook his head, chuckling at the thought. “I need a new bookcase, though.”

“I think my roommate’s boyfriend was looking for a new-” You were cut off, by Harrison and Daisy coming into the showroom.

“Tom! Where’ve you been?” Harrison smiled, clapping the brunette boy on the back. Tom stood there looking between you and Daisy with a broken expression on his face.

“So, Tom, you’ve met Y/N. She’s my, um, my new roommate.” Daisy said and you could feel the awkward tension in the air. She weakly smiled at you, trying to comfort you.

“I just- I need some air.” Tom quickly left the showroom, his right hand on his heart. Harrison rushed after him, and you turned to Daisy, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion and concern.

“What just happened?” You asked her quietly.

“It’s nothing. Tom is his roommate, and he gets a bit stressed around strangers.” Her eyes focused on the dresser in front of her. You were only more confused by her response. That had been the third time you’d encountered Tom since moving to England, and not one of those times did he seem stressed about you being a stranger. You knew there had to be more to it, maybe Tom knew her old roommate.

“I like this one.” You told her, nodding to the dresser and changing the topic off Tom. Your right hand subconsciously found your left wrist and gently rubbed over the mark that had started to burn yet again- it only ever stopped burning when Tom was around.

~~~

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[leavetwn]

* AMANDA CAMPANA, NOBINARY + SHE/HER/THEY/THEM  | you know RAMONA GALLO, right? they’re TWENTY-THREE, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, TWENTY-THREE YEARS? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to CRYING ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR BY MUNA like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole COLD PIZZA AS A HANGOVER CURE, TALKING SHIT ABOUT CUSTOMERS IN THE BREAKROOM, LONGING FOR WHAT COULD'VE BEEN,  thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is AUGUST 17TH, so they’re a LEO, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( claire, 22, est, she/her )

HEY , BESTIES ! happy new year (the way it’s 11:55pm here so barely) !! my name’s claire and i’m 22. i’m livin in the est timezone, and my pronouns are she/her. i’m bringing y’all a mess of a muse 😈 because well  ,,, it’s what i’m best at. if you’re feelin ramona & wanna plot, just go ahead and like this & i’ll hit you up. i usually plot on discord, but if you prefer the tumblr ims, that’s no problem at all. anyway, lemme stop waistin time and get to introducing you to ramona. * tw: mentions of cheating & alcohol. 

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬 .

full name: ramona gallo.  nickname(s): anything your muse wants to call her tbh. age: twenty-three. date of birth: august 17th. zodiac sign: leo. gender/pronouns: non-binary, she/her/they/them. sexual orientation: bisexual. romantic orientation: biromantic. hometown: irving, north carolina. current residence: irving, north carolina. occupation: employee at zoinkies currently,  a lifeguard during the summer. eye color: brown. hair color/style: had long hair up until her breakup then had one of those breakdowns and cut her own hair into a bob and then her own bangs. i bet it was a mess lol so she probably called her friends or went to a salon the very next day to get it fixed. also highlighted the ends red but her natural color is brown. height : 5′5″. clothing style: simple and comfortable. t-shirts, croptops, turtlenecks, all usually paired with either jean shorts or jeans in general. she prefers to feel cozy rather than cute. tattoos: yes. a small one on her wrist. wants more eventually. piercings: both ears peirced & a navel piercing that she did herself against better judgement lol.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐡𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 .

you were born on a scorching hot day in irving , your father says so, anyway. you’re convinced he’s being dramatic. your birth went smoothly; after two previous children, your parents had become disillusioned by childbirth. just another one to add to the bunch, and one that was meant to save a dying marriage. still, they loved you nonetheless. your father, to this day. your mother, until you were ten, and then she up and left without a warning. 

your father keeps food on the table by fixing cars. you spend your days in the hot sun watching him replace parts and continuously try to crank vehicles until they run. he fist pumps every time one does. ‘ how lame, ’ you think, but it’s inspiring how hard he works to take care of three kids. and he does a good job. 

therefore , you spend much of your early life trying to make him proud. you’re smart as a whip, and all your teachers have good things to say about you when it comes to academics. you’re a bit of a troublemaker, though. your father doesn’t mind that too much; he was the same at your age. and he’s proud  —  proud to see you work so hard. 

you spend your teenage years doing much of the same. though , you begin to come home a bit later than usual, and your excuse is that you’ve been at ashley’s or samantha’s, but really all three of you were out partying. you don’t think your father would care (your grades are fine & he wants you to live like a normal teenager) ,  but you still lie about it. why ? well, who knows, maybe you like the adrenaline rush it gives you. like most things, you do them for the thrill. 

you join the swim team. you’re kind of bad , but that’s okay. just like always , you work hard, and you realize that you’re kind of a natural. your father cheers louder than anyone else in the stands. it pushes you to do better. with your good grades and athletics , your guidance counselor tells you you’re a shoo in for a scholarship from whatever university you want. you apply to several. if it’s one thing you hate, its this town. you can’t wait to make it out, and you figure, this might be your only way. 

you’re eighteen, and you’re in love. it’s crazy how love can make you see things differently. suddenly , this town doesn’t seem half bad. all your friends find it cute , and you tell them everything. the things he tells you or the way he makes you feel. it’s a crazy feeling; you never want it to end. 

you throw your cap in the air. finally , high school is over. college is looming. you’ve been accepted to several & received scholarships from at least a few. you lie in bed thinking about it. now, you suddenly don’t want to leave so bad. don’t want to leave him behind. how could someone leave another they love so easily? it makes you hate your mother more.

for the first time, you disappoint your father. you don’t go to college. you don’t give a damn. you want to stay where love is. you’re addicted to the feeling. this lasts for three years. now, you’re twenty-one; you’ve gotten a job at zoinkies, and that keeps you away for most of the day. you randomly decide to visit your boyfriend during a lunch break one day. you find him in bed with someone else. suddenly , you realize love isn’t as addicting as you once thought. what once made the world beautiful now made it hideous. what once made you feel so high had somehow made you feel so low. it was horrible, and you’d realized your mistakes. 

you threw away your future for love. something as rotten and twisted as love. something you swore you’d never let yourself feel again. something that you put away in a locked box with no key. irving was the same place you’d always known it to be. boring, drab, familiar. at least you had your family. that was barely enough to keep you sane, though, and it was hard to feel normal.

you turned to the thing that help. alcohol, partying, any escape at all. you lacked coping skills   —  that much was clear, but you didn’t care. you blamed it on something else entirely. just as your teachers had said, you’re a bit of a troublemaker. you do anything to make yourself feel alive, to make yourself feel free of the hurt. 

it’s two years later now. you’re still not over it in some ways, as regret turns to anger and resentment. you’re bitter. who wouldn’t be? but you feel like you’ve had time to mourn. maybe it’s because you never acknowledged it in the way you should’ve ( it’s still locked away in that box. ) you still have your bad habits. you still work at your stupid job that you hate. you’re lost, but you’ll figure it out. you always do. so, you continue to float , seemingly stuck in the town that you never let go of, and you wonder what comes next. only time will tell.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬 .

still swims but doesn’t have as much time for it. probably not as good, but since she spends the summer lifeguarding, she uses that time to practice & try to get back to where she was. also kinda jaded asf so even if she says she wants to get back into it, she probably won’t lmaoo.

is a horrible driver. how did she get a license ?? not even she knows. def the type to like have a leg up on the dash board, hand out the window, and only one hand on the wheel while speedin idk how she makes it out alive

can take a car apart and put it back together again thanks to her dad. also changes her own tires so let her change your tires. im just sayin 

stays up way too late & would sleep until 2 pm everyday if she didn’t have to work. should probably work on being an adult and going to bed at a normal time but just half the time doesn’t give a fuck so she’s probably sleep deprived a lot. therefore also has a 

character parallels: alice ayres/jane jones (closer, 2004) , clementine (eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, 2004) , fiona gallagher (shameless, 2011-present) , more to be added.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 .

ok but plots really do be making my world go ‘round. 😳 i love em, so literally hmu with anything you’re feeling, and i’ll be down. just wanna plot & write with everyone 💕 but here’s a couple of wanted connections for y’all. i’ll prolly have a most wanted tag sooner or later & i’ma be make a plot page soon.  

* the unholy trinity  — these two are the friends she cherishes most. i’m assuming they’ve been friends since at least early high school , maybe earlier. they went through a lot together. these two were with her through all her relationship troubles. true ride or dies. she’s do absolutely anything for them, and she trusts that they feel the same way. they’re rowdy & wild, do whatever they want, and have a damn good time doin it. also have a gc where they just talk shit and send tiktoks idk just gimme this plsss 🥺

* friends with benefits / one night stands  —  this would probably be the extent of ramona. clearly not over what happened to her the last time 😭, so she’d have plenty of these tbh. she probably wouldn’t think too much about it, but it could be awkward for you muse maybe, etc. 

* unrequited love / crush  —  here’s a toast to the ones who crush on ramona. it would be an absolute tragedy lmaoo. she’s not really mean about it, but she is 100% certain she’s not looking for any type of relationship. could be really dramatic and messy and those are tha best kind. literally this

* former friends / enemies  —  she’s lived here her whole life, so she’s at least got one. these two just don’t get along/no longer get along for whatever reason that can be plotted out. 

* coworkers   — she works zoinkies throughout the year and picks up shifts as a lifeguard during the summer so your muses could know her from that. could delve into a close friend territory too lmao. they probably just sit in break rooms and talk about rude customers or bossy managers lmaooo.

* literally anything your heart desires — a lot could work. we could even just start from nowhere & have them meet for the first time if they’re newer/just to town. 

[thelostandforgottenangel]

Fire Cold As Ice (*Lemon* Leo)

@nikitaboeve @bloody-dark-shells03 @fyreball66 @lonelyheart-clubband @betelgeusessonajblog @blossom-skies @serperiorkb and all my Leonardo ladies! Hope this pleases 

For how cold his blue eyes could be the heat from his gaze could melts a glacier in less then a minute, and right then it was melting her into a puddle just knowing he was looking at her

She didn’t have to turn around to know the turtle was watching from his meditation spot she could feel the way his bright blue orbs were trailing over her body

They seared her skin sending shivers and the slightest heat flushing her skin making the woman’s core ache already wet just thinking of what he might do as that growl left him

He could smell it and she didn’t bother to hide the excitement from the alpha

When she had gotten to the lair with everything they had asked her to pick up from the store she was greeted by the smiling faces of her friends, all except one.

Leonardo had been in his meditation pose eyes closed and focused on his goal of not losing his mind as she joked with the younger three of his brothers getting a soft kiss on her cheek from Mikey making her giggle at how sweet they were being even noting Raphael seemed a lot nicer today

She never looked over putting up the groceries and cleaning off the table that seemed to still be messy from that morning’s breakfast as a tremble ran up her spine

He had to have known what he was doing and just what his eyes could do to her, to tease she bent over her legs spread the slightest bit giving him a good view of her wet center already soaking her jeans

She knew; she had already been warned coming down today might not have been the best idea due to it was the start of his Mating Season and she just happened to be ovulating, it hadn’t stopped her from walking past him just out of reach so he got the scent of her heat. This wasn’t the first year of knowing he had a darker side when his season hit but it was the year she was going to drag it out of him

Once she was done the woman picked up her bag turning to say goodbye to the guys her mischievous eyes barely settling on him is she unbuttoned her top the slightest bit “I’m going home guys!” a small wink shot in his direction and she was out the door not even giving them a proper goodbye

She walked through the tunnels on her way to the manhole that would lead towards her apartment when the softest sound floated past her ear, footsteps not to far back and she knew exactly who they belong to continuing on her way not paying him any mind

Twenty minutes later she entered her home placing her bag on the table going straight to her room where she knew not only was the curtains open but she had left it unlocked when she left

Her hands floated over her body undressing slowly never looking towards the window until a soft tap caught her attention looking up to see Leonardo standing just outside her eyes holding his she unbuttoned her blouse letting it slip off her shoulders and flutter to the ground showing off the dark blue undergarment once she slowly pushed her pants down acting as if she didn’t know she was waving the red flag at the bull

Her hands squeezed her breast making her head tilt back as the sweetest sounding moan left her not hearing the window opening but instantly she was in his arms and against the wall her mouth being crushed under his as his belt was undone he hands quickly helping him with his pants lost in their kiss as she released him

His deep growl was like lightning rumbling through her spine moving his hips against hers in a heat she had never seen “Naughty kitten teasing me~ I think that calls for punishment don’t you?” she smiled as his hard member pressed against her belly one hand giving him a slow stroke that nearly undid him right there his strong arms lifting the smaller body as the woman opened her legs rubbing back against him making sure he could feel how wet she was for him

How ready she was for him to take what was rightfully his

The normally collected turtle groaned loudly at the feeling of her wet heat on his aching cock before he was pulling the underwear to the side churring as his tip slipped between her soft lower lips, looking down with a animalist grin as she arched before his mouth was leaving hot trails of kisses and bites down her neck until his face was between the twin mounds groaning as the silky flesh against his own rough skin

“Leo~ Please my Alpha” he smirked at the breathlessness before latching onto one hard nipple sucking at her finding she was growing even wetter against him as he attended to the sensitive peaks, her soft gasp that turned into his full name spoken so softly and sweetly almost pleading for more “Senshi don’t stop” he grunted as she moved her hips teasing the both of them needing friction so close to her finish before they had even started making his decision easy deciding he knew the best punishment for his naughty girl pushing inside her without another thought

Leonardo was far too needy to wait or be patient and it showed as he took his love fast moving his hips roughly just as he opened her body to him the leaders hard member sliding deep from how aroused his mate was giving into the feral state as her pleasured sounds filled her room wanting to move to the bed but taking her against the wall was just too tempting she looked so sexy pinned against the flower wall paper begging for his cock looking down as her soft breast bounced with every thrust growling under his breath before he was on them again marking her chest and sucking her peaks musing internally at a thought he wanted more then ever

He had waited six years to have her right here in the start of his mating season and that single wishful thought made the turtle in blue growl before he slammed her down on him forcing his tip so deep he felt himself breach her womb thrusting in hard knowing he might be hurting her but hearing her encouraging him to keep going before she gasped happily as he pumped his first load deep inside her making sure he didn’t pull too far back keeping it all in her fertile womb was too good to be true purring upon feeling her pulling him closer once he had to catch himself on the wall breathing into her neck as he shifted his legs moving on their own to her soft nest laying her down coming over her limp form “I’m going to fill you so many times my love and I won’t stop until your round with my seed” he lifted her hips and started moving again unable to satisfy his insatiable needs until his mate was with his child and just that image of her pregnant sent him over the edge “Tonight I will make sure your carrying; before this is over I will make you a mother~”

Her body seemed to be calling to him wanting to be attended to, wanting his cum and he could feel himself throbbing as she tightened around his member yet again at the promise crying out for her turtle to give it to her before he was devouring her lips his hunger uncontrollable as he gave in growling his wish in her ear over and over able to feel what it was doing to her and nearly letting out a relived sigh when she hummed wrapping around him forcing his hips flush against hers “My alpha… please give me a baby, Leo~” she smiled as his cheeks grew dark when she adjusted against him kissing his lips softly

That was all he needed before he was back to his lust filled haze his love let out a sharp cry when he filled her again the throbbing deep within her tight walls making her purr in ecstasy; his cock moving in a way that left her full of pleasure yet so perfectly numb “You’re so beautiful, son or daughter please my geisha let me have the honor of making you mine” his lips found her neck both hands worshiping her soft body until she was calling for her leader her head thrown back in pure lust giving him free reign to mate her; to take what was rightfully his and breed her until she could fulfill this wonderful turtles dream.

They went all night both being loud enough the neighbors would no doubt know his name until she was sure her body couldn’t take much more him never moving too far away watching her face as he brought her body to the edge with his loving how stunning his woman was in the throws of his love his aggressive behavior slowly ending until he was making pure love to her slow and passionate whispering in her ear just how gorgeous she would be carrying his little one, how she would glow and be perfect in his eyes as if she wasn’t already. The final few rounds as the sky started to lighten were more him then anything her tummy already bulged from his loads still trapped within her before both fell into a boneless heap together him smiling so happily as she praised him tiredly, he looked down at her when she fell silent chuckling before he was cuddled close once more seeing her out cold yet still smiling as he stayed inside her wanting to insure success

He held her watching her sweet face until the sun peeked through the curtains kissing her neck and flushed cheeks before settling into her warm blankets breathing in her scent one hand over her belly so proud of his mate for surviving the night and praying when she woke up after he spoiled her rotten with a relaxing bath and some pampering to help her recover hopefully she was ready for the next rounds to come

He meant what he said she was going to be pregnant before this Mating Season ended

[carbootsoul]

i was tagged by @katarahairloopies!!! thank u :mwah:

name: leo! @/zeitgeistofnow on ao3, @lazypigeon & @timetohope on here, altho i’m considering uh switching back to not having an art blog :/ i have to think abt it.

fandom(s): ace attorney is my main one rn bc i’m replaying the games with a friend of mine and it’s reminding me how invested i am in the characters!! a lot of my recent fic is atla stuff, altho i’ve been distancing myself from the fandom bc i’ve kinda exhausted my interest in it. finally i’ve been reading a lot of mp100 fic but i don’t think i’ll ever write for it. i just love how dumb all the characters r (with the dubious exception of ritsu)

where you post: ao3!! tbh i always get suprised when people say they write/read fic on any other platform like i haven’t messed around w wattpad or ff.net since middle school... catch up........

most popular oneshot: going just by “one chapter” as the definition of a oneshot, the firestarters, bc it’s fluffy and modern au :) i wouldn’t necessarily call it a oneshot tho bc to me a oneshot shows like, one scene? so like by my definition and your sweet sweet sun makes me crazy (i wanna lay you down and see how you amaze me is my most popular!! (also @ kit u thought UR fic titles were unnecessarily long??? i’ve hit the ao3 LIMIT for characters in titles. it’s about the aesthetic

most popular multichapter fic: sdkjflakjlkj it’s two crowned kings; and one that stood alone, which is a w359 fic i wrote back in late 2017. it’s literally the last fic i haven’t orphaned from when i actually wrote podcast fic (i have 4 other podcast fics but they were all borne out of nostalgia and written after i stopped participating in the fandom). i rewrote all but the last chapter? the last two? about a year ago and i fucked up halfway through so like chapter 6 and 7 are repeated and there’s something missing but i’m too lazy to fix it. no one’s going to read it now anyway :) it WAS the top minlace fic for a little while tho which i take great pride in.

favorite story you’ve written so far: oh that’s a hard question akfsldkfj i honestly like most of them!! and i write a LOT so there’s a lot to choose from. tonight, we are young is def one of my favorites- it was fun to write and i got to explore the ways zuko and yue r similar, which i LOVE to do outside of a zukka/yukka view. you can lean on my arm as you break my heart  is one that i’m really proud of? the whole “cooking as an expression of bato’s love” is definitely some of my favorites. a lot of my ace attorney fics would be categoried as my favorites if i hadn’t improved, too, if that makes sense. like they’re no long my favorites because i can see where my writing is shitty and it bothers me, but if i had written them a month ago they’d be my favorite.

fic you were nervous to post: figures 1-5: killing gods def!! it’s a lot more purple-prose-y than most of my fics and it was also written before i’d kinda like emersed myself in the atla fandom so i didn’t have as good a grasp on the general understanding of zuko’s character as i do now. tbh it’s one i’m rly happy w tho!! i have a few people leave really nice comments on it and rereading them makes me really happy. also it was the start of me hating the position of fire lord and being at least passively anti-it in my fics.

how you choose your titles: they’re almost all song lyrics!! only 14 of my 50 words AREN’T song lyrics and about half of those are from before i started writing ace attorney fic lol. sometimes i go into a fic with a song in mind for the vibes and then i usually go with lyrics from that (like in ‘cuz we’re the greatest /they’ll hang us in the louvre), but otherwise i usually pick an artist i’ve been listening to and go through their songs until i find a lyric that fits. sometimes the lyric doesn’t even really fit the fic and i just chose it at random or because i searching up the word “fly” in my spotify library or whatever. honestly i like coming up with titles? i know a lot of fic writers hate it but being able to just use song lyrics is v soothing for me and while i know that most people won’t search out a song just bc it’s a fic title like.. seeing that the title of a fic is a hozier lyric does affect how i read it and i kinda like that.

do you outline? i outline my long form/multichaptered fics with varying strictness. usually anything over ~8k will have some kind of outline. sometimes i go into it with every single scene planned out, sometimes it’s just notes on the side of the google doc that say “it's about MORE family. about how it's not betraying your existing family to find more” and “scenes i want to include: [...]” and “vampires... ngl kinda hot.” i’m trying to outline super strictly less bc i’ve found it’s less fun? but i do try to keep a plot arc in mind. since most of my fics are more character-driven than plot-driven, that usually just means keeping track of what character development i want to happen or what is motiviating the characters. 

complete: um everything posted on ao3 i guess. also the MULTITUDE of orphaned fics out there asksfjldkj i always click ‘leave my pseud on’ so if u look up my username you see all of my fics and then a. lot of other ones.

in progress: - a fic titled ‘dad phoenix’ that is actually just a no DL-6 au with defense attorney miles edgeworth and single dad bartender phoenix where neither of them want to date for A While but phoenix gets wrapped up in one of miles’s cases. it’s about family. it’s about writing teenagers. it’s about the background franmaya which is ALWAYS what i’m here for in wrightworth fics - a franmaya werewolf/vampire au because i’m ~gay~ and love rivals to lovers and also franziska and maya both being angry their older brothers r dating each other. - my secret santa fic!! which i can’t talk about much but it does feature toph and zuko and also piandao and jeong jeong???? idk where they came from but they are Part Of The Fic Now also i forgot iroh existed for half the fic and wrote piandao as zuko’s father figure and now i’m in too deep. - a 5+1 bakoda fic (maybe a bato/hakoda/kay fic??? i need to decide. that’s part of why this fic is still incomplete bc i can’t decide which relationship dynamic i prefer) that’s 5 times bato said he loves hakoda and one time hakoda said it back. possibly i have already written him saying i love u back and i need to change the title a little. - retail au klapollo where klavier works at an overpriced boutique and apollo comes in to buy earrings for nahyuta’s birthday. klavier gives him a punch card (one that the store doesn’t actually offer anymore as a bid to get apollo to come back) and all of apollo’s family come in to use the punch card and also give klavier variations on the shovel talk/find out if he’s actually into apollo. - a LOT of atla fics that i don’t think i’ll ever finish :(

coming soon/not yet started:  - i want to write some blackmadhi bc they’re.. cute..... and it’s a good excuse to also write athena and i love her - my stuff for yueki week!!! i have NOT prepped enough but hopefully i’ll remember in time! i wrote the prompts in a way that kinda set up stuff i’ve already wanted to write (don’t look at me lol) so hopefully i’ll get at least two or three fics finished in time. - i want to rewrite the wrightworth fic i have about them not getting married bc it was interesting and i like what i wrote about but i think i could have written it better and made it more interesting. rewriting fics is hard tho bc i’m never sure if it makes sense to just edit in the new work or to repost it? and then if u repost it do u delete the old one? conflicting so i might just not

do you accept prompts? totally!!! a disclaimer tho i’m not super into writing atla stuff anymore (most of the atla stuff i’m still writing is  something i made a commitment to finish) so if your prompt is an atla one i probably won’t do it :/ basically anything else is fair game tho!! podcasts/aa/sa/uh i don’t remember anything else but like if you search a fandom on my blog and come up with more than two posts about it chances r i’d be happy to write fic for it!

upcoming work that you’re most excited about: oh huh i mean probably the no dl-6 au!!! it’s the longest ace attorney fic i’ve written already and since it’s wrightworth it’ll get more attention than any franmaya fic i write. my standards r so high now tho after getting to much feedback from atla fans... love u all... obviously i have no choice but to pressure my atla mutuals into playing ace attorney. pls ask abt it bc i WIll Give You A Sales Pitch about why you’d like it in relation to atla

tagging: i’m not rly tagging anyone!!! @deadflora if you still consider urself a fic writer also consider urself tagged! also any of my other mutuals who write fic i just can’t think of anyone rn

[ewoodx]

ETHAN WOOD SEASON 3 !! [GREGG SULKIN , MALE , HE/HIS ] do you hear [PHENOMENAL BY EMINEM ] coming from the beach ? oh, that has to be [ ETHAN WOOD] . they are a [ TWENTY THREE ] year old [PROFESSIONAL SOCCER PLAYER ] from the outer banks, and they’ve been living there for [TWENTY TWO YEARS ] . they were chosen to be on the show because they are a [ KOOK] , but really , I heard it’s because they can be [ ILL TEMPERED  & DEMANDING ] . if you get to know them though , they’re pretty [PROTECTIVE & ENERGETIC] . they might become a quick audience favorite due to their [ SIGNATURE SMIRK, PRETTY BOY CHARM & RIPPLING PECTORALS]

Hello hello hello !! I’m Ally & this is the updated bio for Ethan Wood, your favorite arrogant, footballer with a hot temper && a secret heart of gold..I promise ;) Shoot me a message if you’re interested in plotting.

BASICS:

Full name;  Ethan Alexander Wood

Nicknames; E, Wood

Age; 22

School; UNC

Birthday; August 19th

Height; 5’11 but he’ll tell you he’s 6ft

Parents; Oliver and Heidi Wood

Siblings; two brothers: Julian (older) & Damian (younger)

Occupation; Striker for Inter Miami FC 

Birth place; the eight, OBX 

Current location; Miami 

Sign; Leo

(+) ; protective & energetic.

(-) ; ill-tempered & demanding

Sexuality; heterosexual

Pogue or Kook; Kook

Character Inspiration;  zach siler (she’s all that) chuck bass (gossip girl), mickey milkovich (shameless), damon salvatore (vampire diaries) tim riggins (friday night lights) asher adams (all american) billy hope (southpaw) joe kingman (the game plan), ares (greek mythology) 

EARLY YEARS;

Ethan Wood was born and raised to do one thing and one thing only: play soccer. Being the middle child of legendary University of North Carolina starting forward Olivier Wood and renowned athleisure wear designer Daphne Wood, there was only one path for this budding young soccer prodigy. And it was to follow in daddy’s footsteps donning the prestigious Carolina blue and white of his father’s alma mater. 

His childhood was pleasant, raised on his family’s estate in the coveted Eight and filled with family getaways and father/son trips to UNC/Wake Forest rivalry matches. Matches that he hoped to one day play in. Young Ethan was a natural talent and he picked up the game rather quickly, spending every free moment practicing in the yard or scribbling down strategies. He wanted nothing more than to make his father proud and carry on his legacy. 

HIGH SCHOOL;

Ethan was sent to one of the finest private schools on the island that money could buy. Of course, he wasn’t there for his grades and what he lacked in brains, his skills on the field made up for. He made varsity soccer his freshman year and then went on to become captain during his senior year, reveling in all the perks that came with being a star athlete: parties, hookups, popularity. As Ethan’s athletic abilities along with his ego continued to grow, so did his competitive edge, arrogance, and hot temper which is known for getting him into trouble on and off the pitch. He’s no stranger to an alcohol induced bawl and struggles to keep his temper under control. 

COLLEGE;

It’s no secret that in the OBX money talks and Mr. Wood had deep pockets. A library donation and a legacy later, Ethan finally realized his dream and secured a spot on his beloved UNC soccer team. His temper being the reason for the trouble in the first place. It didn’t take long for him to become the frat star worthy of his reputation. Sure, he had to overcome those pesky freshman years, team hazing, and locker room banter, even spending the half a season on the bench for his hot headed temper. Nonetheless, he managed to make a name for himself even if slightly tarnished.

SEASON 1; 

Fresh off his college graduation, Ethan returned to the Outer Banks with his sights set on playing professional soccer in the upcoming season. Before entering the real world in the fall, he joined the show for one last hurrah and boy did he get what he signed up for. The summer was filled with all sorts of shenanigans, parties, booze, and hook-ups. 

Ethan rounded out the first season of OBX rather unscathed, save for a secret hook-up and an unlikely friendship that he formed with a pogue. He gained some notoriety from the show and it was a perfect launch for his new life in the public eye.  

SEASON 2; 

Ethan started footy training in the fall after the reality show ended, and he played for Inter Miami FC, a team owned by David Beckham himself. He took up residence in Miami for the soccer season and traveled the country with his team becoming the soccer star he always wanted to be. His rookie season was one for the books, and if you thought his ego couldn’t get any bigger, check again. 

In his off time, Ethan maintained his growing popularity by making appearances at all the Miami hot spots and keeping up a rather impressive social media presence, constantly posting his fitness routines and workouts in addition to his nights out. This earned him a reputation off the pitch, and his name managed to find its way into the local papers and magazines. He did his best to keep in touch with his friends from the show despite his busy schedule, and even visited the OBX whenever he could. 

With his first professional soccer season in the books, Ethan returned to the reality show for another summer, much to his PR team’s dismay who was working to clean up with reputation, not add to it. It was another summer filled with partying, booze, and messing around. A well deserved celebration after a triumphant soccer season. Ethan grew closer with his housemates and even started forming stronger connections with some of them as family, friends, or more. 

POST SEASON 2;

High off another successful season of Outer Banks, Ethan went back to Miami with a newfound air of confidence about him and an extra pep in his step. He worked and trained twice as hard, determined to play even better than last year. He managed to  keep up his scoring average and earned ‘man of the match’ in several games. Ethan spent less time in the OBX, but instead invited his buddies to come matches and come visit whenever he got the chance. He loved to preform and there was something about having the cast around that made him play even better. 

With only a handful of games left, Ethan suffered an injury that cut his season short. He tore his MCL and spent the months leading up to the summer recovering and going to physical therapy in Miami. His PR team advised him against returning to the show to focus on getting in shape for the upcoming season, but Ethan couldn’t pass up the opportunity to spend the summer in Australia with his crew. 

POGUES VS KOOKS;

Ethan got into his fair share of Pogues vs Kooks scuffles back in high school. Nights filled with stupid boyish banter, booze, and blows. He likes to think he’s above all the rivalry now— playing pro ball and all—  but sometimes he still struggles to truly let go of the past and be the bigger person. He’s an athlete though and though, and rivalries are all just a part of the game.

HEADCANONS;

Despite the ever present confident air about him, Ethan is super generous especially when it comes to nights out and tipping. He is always happy to pick up the tab and doll out rounds of shots for him and his buddies at no charge. As selfish as he can be sometimes, he loves it when his friends are having a good time and is a firm believer in the more the merrier.

To help him keep his tempter on and off the pitch under control, Ethan got into boxing/mma and incorporates it into his workouts whenever he can. He can be found either going to a gym to practice his upper cuts or on beach working on them on his own. He does it mostly for fun, but every now and again finds himself having to throw down. 

For the most part, Ethan can’t really cook, but on the off chance he’s not sneaking out after a one night stand, he makes a killer breakfast, usually in his boxers.

He has secret love for astronomy and mythology particularly hero myths and the stories behind the constellations. Growing up, he always found them fascinating and was the only one of his brothers who would actually sit and listen to his grandfather babble on about them. Those were some of his most cherished memories, and he often celebrates his goals by blowing a kiss to the heavens to dedicate them the ol’ man. 

Moana is his absolute favorite Disney movie, and he will never say no to watching it. He also thinks Maui is the shit and knows all of the words to “You’re Welcome” by heart. Beware, he will actually belt it out if asked.

WANTED CONNECTIONS;

let’s make ‘em jealous; There’s no denying that Ethan and this person have chemistry. They are super flirty and all over each other, but in reality it’s all a rouse. They aren’t really into one another and are merely using each other to stir up some drama, cause a scene, and make the ones that really do catch their eyes jealous.  [OPEN]

the role model; Ethan didn’t really have many positive role models to look up to growing up, mainly just his father and his toxic masculinity. This person helps Ethan balance all that out and helps him deal with all those pesky emotions he was taught to keep suppressed inside in order to “be a man.” This person also keeps him in check and isn’t afraid to give him a much needed smack to the upside of the head when necessary. [OPEN]

the rival; To say Ethan is competitive is the understatement of the century, and he and this person have a rivalry for the ages. The two don’t like each other and this person never fails to get under Ethan’s skin. It could have even started back in school and carried over to now. Perhaps the reason Ethan had some trouble getting into UNC for soccer? Bonus points if they have to put all their differences aside and work together at some point for a common goal. [OPEN]

the hook-ups; Ethan really isn’t the type to stick around after a hook-up and is usually out before the sun comes up, never wanting to get attached. If anyone wants to give him a much deserved slap upside the head or just wants to keep things casual and flirty, let me know! [OPEN]

the real bros; for those looking for a second muse, Ethan has two brothers xD. Julian and Damian (names can totally change! I just headcannon them all ending in -an) He has one older brother who rejected the athlete/UNC/kook life leaving Ethan with the pressure to fill daddy’s soccer boots. They had a fall out and their relationship is shaky at best. Ethan also has a baby bro who he is definitely closer with. They get on rather typically through harmless banter and school boy shenanigans. He also has an innate protectiveness over him because he is older. [OPEN]

Totally open to anything and everything, so feel free to shoot me a message!! Also if you read all that WOW. You are the real MVP.

[pythosart]

A big ol 2019 end of the year update

I felt somewhat compelled to write my end of the year/decade thoughts, but a warning before you read: This one’s going to be heavy, intensely personal, and long. If you don’t feel up to reading that, it may be best to skip it. I promise I’ll go back to shutting up and posting art afterwards. I’m profoundly incapable of being concise, ever, so apologies for the length of this.

2019 was a nightmare.

Some background: In mid 2016, my mother was diagnosed with a rare form of liver cancer. She was given a few months to live. She was given weeks or months to live multiple times, for almost three years. In that time my mom was in and out of the hospital, but spent all her good days living life to the fullest, starting and finishing dream projects, and keeping all of us going despite her own situation. Even when she was bedridden, hooked up to tubes and bags and god knows what, she found time to prop up her loved ones and pursue her hobbies. She even managed to develop new hobbies and interests while otherwise imprisoned by her physical state, something I struggle to do at the best of times even in my young and relatively healthy form. If there’s anything I can make of this experience, it’s that I hope to grow into even half the woman my mother was.

I ended 2018 with my final quarter at SCAD. I spent the entire quarter terrified my mom was going to die while I was away from home. It was horrific, I barely scraped by my last few classes (bless my professors’ endless patience), and immediately left Savannah for home as soon as the quarter was up. I never had room to celebrate finishing college. Any other year it would be a huge milestone, but I barely even care.

This past May, my mother passed away, after three years of petrifying suspense. It happened in the dead middle of the night, while my best friend was visiting for a con, and it still feels like a bad dream. It’s also one of the only vivid memories I even have of this year. 

I wish I had more to say on that, but I genuinely think the drawn out suffering and fracturing of my whole world left me unable to fully unpack everything that’s happened. It’s hard to even think about for long, and at times I even half-forget she’s gone. I think of things I want to show her, or tell her, or cook with her. Just the other day I kept thinking I’d tell her how much I liked endive after she showed me how to make it. I found a historical Italian cooking channel that, every time I see it, I just think of how much she’d love it. I knew she’d love Hot Fuzz but never got to show her. Little, stupid things that shouldn’t matter, but they do. They just do.

My mother and I were close, much closer than I am with my dad. Especially towards the end of her life, we had gotten closer, and I felt like I was only just really getting to know her as an equal. I still want to share my life with her, but that chance is gone.

This holiday season has been especially rough in her absence, because not only was my mom the motivational and creative force behind a lot of holiday activities here, it’s the first everything without her. We had Thanksgiving with friends and a catered dinner, instead of spending several days cooking and polishing family silver and setting the table. I won’t be making handmade tortellini with her for Christmas like we did every year. It’s the little things like that.

We’re a tiny family, with over half of us in Italy and lacking much communication due to the language barrier. Family holidays were always small, but there’s just a huge hole how, much greater than the cold numeric value of “one fewer participant.” My mom was always a driving force and a keystone in our support networks, not to mention the main line of contact with the Italian-speaking side of the family, so now the family feels so much more scattered and isolated than ever.

My girlfriend was close to my mother too, and as she’s been living with me for years now and is practically part of the family, I think she took it just as hard as anyone. Cel saw everything I did, and dealt with many of the same uncertainties and traumatic experiences I did.

A month after I lost my mother, I lost my cat too. Galileo was twelve years old, a spry old man who yelled instead of meowed, and just a wonderful cat. I got him when I was in 7th grade, after begging my parents for years to get me a cat. It was my mom who eventually overrode my dad’s hesitations, and from then on Leo was part of the family. He went through a very sudden decline over the course of a week or two, and we learned it was cancer. Feline lymphoma, I think. I had to make the call to put him to sleep, and it ripped what was left of my heart out.

Not that it needs stating, but fuck cancer.

A few too-short months later, I cut ties with a “friend,” which despite how fucking much it hurt, was really for the best. At a certain point one simply can no longer afford to waste energy on a certain kind of person. Unfortunately I’m a persistently optimistic idiot, and it took me too long to cut my losses before deep damage was done. Done to me, my close friends, and even barely involved acquaintances this “friend” dumped on relentlessly and tried to harass into spying on me. Really, if any part of this is unforgivable, it’s that.

All this was, however, a valuable reminder that it’s no good to have any tolerance for habitually dishonest people, even if they think they’re doing it to look “nice.” Chronic liars will gaslight you whether they know it or not, and trying to navigate that in an already damaged mental state is inadvisable. It was an important lesson in picking one’s battles, albeit one learned too late. I’m still holding out hope I can find it in my heart to forgive this person, if only for my own selfish sake so I can move on. I have a lot of experience living on spite, and I don’t want to make a further habit of it.

Naturally all of the above did little to curb my already inflamed pessimism about the state of my country and the world at large, but I need not expand on that, I imagine.

I suppose it would be unfair of me to leave it all at that and only mention the negative, though admittedly positivity is hard to muster these days. A few bright spots of note:

Graduated from SCAD with my BFA in Sequential Art (technically last year, but I did the ceremonial bit this year)

Tabled at Animazement with Woods. We barely broke even, but it was a great time and I plan on doing it again in the new year.

Spent literally an entire month hanging out with my two best friends, which was amazing and exactly the kind of healing experience I needed around that time of year.

Properly did Halloween for the first time in years. I made a costume I’m proud of and we went out on the town… for like an hour, because it promptly started pouring. But fun nevertheless

Started therapy. As of writing this, I’ve only had an introductory session, but it’s a start. Should have started six months ago, but didn’t for reasons to be addressed...in therapy

Started volunteering at the local natural history museum, where I spent like half my childhood. I’ll be doing data entry in collections, but that’s still cool as hell

Got a start on figuring out what I want to do with my life. It’ll involve going back to school for science within the next five-ish years, but it’s nice to have a goal. More of a goal than I’ve ever had, in fact.

Played some extremely good video games (shout out to The Blackout Club and Control)

Made a shitload of unnecessary yet endlessly fun and good AUs with my friends and my one (1) OC

Got an iPad Pro and started learning Procreate, which has gotten me drawing more

Learned a bit of needle felting

2019 was a year of getting much closer to my two best friends, and I genuinely owe them my life at this point. I don’t know where I’d be without them. Nowhere good, certainly.

Woods and Dross kept me talking to people, kept me creating, told me when I was being unreasonable or needed to cool it, heard me out when I needed it but always kept me honest. They helped me keep some creative juices flowing when otherwise I’d have been at a frustrated loss and might have given up for good. If it seems like I’ve kept up my usual art output at all, and if you’ve enjoyed the Lou content (or not, whoops... apologies to everyone who followed me for monster content) you have both of them to thank.

Even moreso, I owe my girlfriend a great deal for being there for me through all of this while she herself was suffering similarly. She and I have had our ups and downs, and been through a lot in the five-ish years we’ve been together. We aren’t the most outspoken couple, but I think our mutual understanding and pain mitigated a lot of the damage this year has done. I don’t think I could have handled it alone.

Furthermore, I really need to thank a lot of other friends and acquaintances I’m not quite as close with, but still talk to. These people especially were willing to call me on my bullshit when necessary, or just talk to me at all, about anything. Even if these acquaintances didn’t know it at the time, there’s a good chance they were dragging me out of one of my frequent existential despair spirals.

I also, weirdly, owe a lot to helping my hen Julia recover from her dog attack. That was around the time that my mom’s health was in its final decline, when I felt the most helpless and despairing. I think having even some tiny something I could do to help was like, the only feeling of control I had in life for a bit there. Julia’s fine, by the way. Still queen of the yard, top chicken boss bitch, etc. Julia was always a kind of kindred spirit with my mom, in a way. Little but not to be underestimated, gray, big personality and commanding presence… Not to mention, she was one of the first in our flock and was always my mom’s favorite. 

It would be too much to say I have high hopes or plans of any kind for the upcoming year, but I do have a list of things I want to try and do. Some of which will involve art, and the posting thereof.

Big if on this one, but I’ve also recently started therapy (only took me half a year to work up to making a phone call after the first failed attempt took all the wind out of my sails) and I have…maybe not high hopes, but hopes, for that doing something to help. I should have started therapy two years ago, but the second best time is now, etc etc.

I have a lot of New Year’s resolutions, beyond the usual “get in shape, drink less coffee, blah blah” that I’ll try and write up a little list of separately. Most of them are art-related, so you all will be there to watch me swing and miss I PROMISED I’D TRY TO BE LESS NEGATIVE. New Year’s resolution #1: Maybe don’t make so many self-deprecating jokes.

Anyway, I don’t know how to end any wall of text, be it an OC worldbuilding screed or something serious like this, so... I guess, love yourself, cherish your friends, know when to put your own needs first and when to put your friends’ needs firster. One of the things my mom taught me in this past year or so is that relationships are what you make of them, and that it’s okay to be selfish sometimes. Be generous, be genuine, don’t be a doormat and don’t lie to people you care about, even if it seems kinder in the moment. Savor the time you have with those close to you, and spend time doing things you love. Cliché, maybe, but cliché can still be true. Happy new year, everyone. I sincerely hope it will treat us all better. 2020 may just be an imaginary change of numbers, but I like to think it really does wipe the slate in a way, and make room for all of us to do what we can to be better. Speaking of which, vote. For the love of all that is good, vote.

--

A little bullet list of New Year’s resolutions, because it’s nicer to look at

Try to get back in shape (of course) - That 30 days of strength thing was good while it lasted, despite my joints hating me

Learn some new recipes, preferably with fewer carbs, you Italian ass

Keep a physical calendar and stick with it for at least a few months

Learn at least one new skill by the middle of the year, whether it’s art-related or something else

Start writing more. Don’t have to share it, but try. Write down ideas somewhere other than Discord where they’re easy to lose

Either reopen Patreon or figure out how ko-fi works. Even if it’s for no money, just to have structure and goals.

Do Animazement again and try out some new product types

Go to SCAD career fair with a decent portfolio

Get better about spending, by whatever method works

Attend some art classes at the local collectives, doesn’t matter what

Play more video games. I swear I only played like three new things this year 

Read more classic literature and nonfiction, at least one book per month. I’ve been really enjoying Agatha Christie’s works and am about to start Guns, Germs, and Steel

Read more comics. Basically just consume more media

Do Halloween again, better this time

See friends in person more

Practice accepting whatever shitty thoughts show up and then letting them go, rather than dwelling on them

[shiro-0197]

God no I'm sorry 😭😭😭 the way Tumblr eats all my drafts, and now your replies. (Someday I'm gonna eat Tumblr grrrr) that must've been so frustrating tho, I'm sorry love.

someday we could go to a country with Highlands together. It'll be super cold and nice. And the views would be really really pretty too!! WE COULD EVEN BE AMONGST THE CLOUDS >//< aww yes I hope you'll be able to try them soon in the future!! I died and had to stay in bed for an hour, (because my spice tolerance is nonexistent <3) but yeah I'm better now! Name is: "대박 ghost pepper noodles" the Korean word 대박 literally translates to "awesome" but— 😭😭

oh I see!! I hope school goes well, it's good that you're excused for a part of the day :D and aww I understand. Replying can be lengthy sometimes, so please please only do it when you're free and comfortable >:(( we're in no rush, after all :D

I was studying earlier too. and I texted my principal about the exams ( because apparently none of my teachers know anything about it, and I was so frustrated with everyone being so clueless ) she just replied with a : "hi Ariana, will let you know on Friday" like excuse me, ma'am. GRRRRR >:( STOP BEING CLUELESS.

awww that's okay!! I'm sure those prep slides were really pretty too :D aww that's sweet of you. some of my online friends sometimes sit in on my Leo events (if it's open to everyone) and it's pretty fun when they do (once, one of them had to talk for like, an activity and my club mates were like "SHE HAS AN ACCENT??". It was hilarious hehe) zoom is great for that reason, and only that. they're just ready-made slides tbh, I use canva :D

Shiro, love, you won't disappoint anyone, I promise you that. I'm sure your mom is more proud than you know, and from the way you talk about her, I can tell that she truly adores you. tho I also understand your worries. If you want to rant or anything, you know I'm here. And I'll just continuously reassure you of how amazing you are :)

that's my boy 🥺🥺 grr, you're so feisty, please imagine me holding a "you go, Shiro" sign everytime you tell someone to fuck themselves :D Laurent is indeed amazing. He's my favourite character for that exact reason >//< there's another character, from a book I read, just like that. His name was uhh, Kieran. And he knew so many different languages, and was just in general; super smart. I remember being so in love with him when I first read it (The title of the book is "genius")

HAHA. ikr. They're all hot, and most importantly; smart. nevermind, when I meet you someday we can cry over them together 😭🤚 pffft no offense, but being evil is hot sometimes 😾 (I mean, Kieran was evil. So's Moriarty :] and I am: a simp for them all)

aww bae that's okay 🥺🥺 your feelings are valid, and it's not wrong to express them whenever you feel like it. Grrr if I ever see your dad, he might be missing a limb >:( sorry, that was violent, but I get especially mad if anyone upsets someone i love )

exactly?? It's been a year?? Where's that blink meme where someone blinks and it's suddenly 2021. Oooh that sounds really nice!! Adding it on my list of things to try in March >.< Honey is really delicious. especially all those desserts which have a lot of them.

glad I made you laugh >////< grr my sense of humour is just so weird tho, so I'm glad you aren't freaked out by it.

KAJDKSJSKS SIR WAIT. There was an explanation for that u but I guess it got cut off in my notes 😾😾 IT WAS MEANT TO BE A Ü (smiley) but I was using my computer and I couldn't add the two dots above, so I typed "imagine the eyes" (but apparently that part got cut off and now it just looks like a random alphabet SKJSKSK IM SORRY 😭😭😭

I understand, the lack of opportunities can really get on one's nerves. But oh yes, Japan and Norway are beautiful countries. Apart from Japan, I've been really into Korea and Switzerland. The Alps 😻

grrr y'all have tough exteriors. But it's so rewarding when you finally get them down, tho I think, you guys have tons of other layers to yourselves. I guess that's just the charm, I find it endearing, because it just means there's a lot more than meets the eye :)

MY FRIEND MAKES FUN OF ME FOR LIKING PINK. HE TEASES ME MERCILESSLY SKSJSKSK (so I published a poem line in the school magazine to get back at him for it, because I'm petty like that)

that's so funny >.< There are two girls, and a girl and a guy, who share the exact same names in my class, and it's so funny because they're opposites of each other xD

he really is precious. The best leader, I would literally die for him, he's wonderful. yeah the book actually started out different, with them just being best friends. Best plot twist 😭😭 AWW

NOOO I'm sure it's cute, in it own way? :P tho that meme tho. LDJCJSBSKS. Don't worry, hehe, the character may be .... Unpleasant to look at?? , but you're not the least bit at all :)

how was your day btw? My day sucked ass and was literally the worst day in the history of uh, days. Yeah. sad. tomorrow will be better.

God, you're so adorable wtf. Marry me rn. AKDJSKSJS I didn't find it lame at all, (tho were you flustered? Because that was cute as hell xD) I love you too 🥺🥺

—☃️

It's okay, it's not your fault. We could storm the Tumblr building together or something..:3

Oh I really hope we can!!! I love cold weather. You can wear sweaters and hoodies and all that💞 and you have an excuse to cancel everything and cuddle up with a blanket or someone else😝

Im so glad you're better now!! Spice sickness or whatever is the worst😔 WBHDJWKX that's hilarious I hope I come across those soon! Let's see who wins😼

Yeah, about that, they started making us do after-class activities, which now leaves less time for the stuff I have to do .... which sucks . But I'm managing, I think, so it's cool xD yeah, I've always been kind of cautious about the timing, it's nice to have a little freedom now, thank you so much <3

Wow😭😭 our teachers usually have the dates set two weeks before the exams, we always recieve a message. Though I've been there, where the teacher have no clue, it's so annoying😭😭

Ohh, that's so cool! I hope I will be able to visit one someday. Though I dont think itll be too soon, but I'm looking forward to when I can😝 also that's funny, whenever I speak people go "he doesnt have an accent???" Even though I so obviously do. They just have no idea 😭

Okay..... that's the best words of encouragement I've ever received, I'm so touched- thank you🥺💘

Bwahah, that's gonna make my day every time 😭 Yeah, hes my favorite too!! He seems like a simple himbo at first, but the more we see of him the better he gets. (That sounds cool!!! I'm gonna check it out when I can!)

Thank you🥺 also, dont worry, I wouldn't mind that. I'd love that, actually, wanna go rip off guys arms together?

MZJXKGJJAKXKAKX IT'S ALRIGHT HAHAH, ITS REALLY FUNNY SO DONT WORRY😭😭

JSNFNMWMDMS IM GONNA MAKE FUN OF HIM FOR MAKING FUN OF YOU how could he . I will eat his eyeballs. Also I 100% agree with the poem and I'm glad you posted it. I hope some people thought about it.

Wow😭😭 its honestly so funny, because they're all so different and yet their names fit them so well either way.

Also, wow I feel so bad it's been almost a week since I responded😐 I'm really sorry. I've been writing snips of this message any time I could and yet it still took me days xD I'm getting free, though, so I'll try to respond faster now. I missed talking to you so much😭 thank you for your patience🤍🤍🤍

How've you been? I'm pretty good, tired but feeling good because I can finally respond😩 I hope your day went well. Love you!♡

[trollcafe]

Not everyone celebrates the same. Old, young, and anything in-between, everyone handles their succession through life differently.

Somewhere under the waves, in an old hive, a fuchsia stands looking out of the glass wall at his lusus. His arms are folded behind his back as he stands with a proper posture. One of the few good habits he learned from the fleet. He didn’t learn much that was helpful when he served, but he owed them a few things. 

His palmhusk goes off from the other side of the room. He leaves his lusus to pick it up, finding the message from his hatchmate. 

“Hey Leo, I found this old picture of us when we were wrigglers. Your hair used t’ be to da^^n long.” 

The image attached was a bittersweet one. Two near identical fuchsia wrigglers in wetsuits, each holding a little trident. Their lusus had made them take formal pictures in case they died young, so their memory wouldn’t be erased. Leonra studied the image closely, zooming in on what used to be his round and chubby cheeks. Bruuno was right, his hair used to be long. Itw as a disaster back then. Leo closed the image and replied, “It’s vveird seeing you vvith tvvo ar^^s.” 

--

In an old bar miles away, a seadweller with stained-glass fins leans over a desk to get a better look at the computer screen. Another seadweller leans back, letting them get a better look. The maroon woman finally speaks, prodding the anon’s arm with a finger. Her voice is scratchy and has a wobble. “Do you see the problem, Mae?” “Not yet, Zel. Be patient.” Maesun replies, moving the mouse up to X out of a tab. 

“....Mae. It’s that one holiday you used t’ like as a wriggler.” Zellie’s ears twitch slightly. 

“I know. We’ve had many of them at this point. And your computer’s still busted. We can get drinks and be nostalgic later.” 

“There’s nothin’ to be nostalgic over.” She snickered softly, “Things’re better now.” 

---

While cleaning off the shelves in her lab, the tall blueblood found an old bone. She carefully examined it, holding it close to her face. 

“Whatcha got, Thersa?” The cerulean boy watching her asked curiously. 

“I think it’s my first bone! If I recall, I found it outside while walking hive from class one day. I still don’t know what it is, possibly a squirrel femur. Do squirrels have femurs?” She giggled as she passed the small bone to Zoltan. 

“I ‘unno, my dude. Looks cool as shit though. Maybe we can take this ‘n a few other lil bones and do a cool photoshoot with ‘em.” He looked up, meeting her blue eyes with a smile. 

“We can! I have some girlfriends I’m meeting for dinner tonight, but maybe tomorrow after work?” She tilted her head slightly as she brought up the question. 

“Sure. Who ya meetin’? What’s the occasion? Can I come?” Zoltan was eager to hang around her more, and any friends of Thersa’s were friends of his! 

“Hm…” Thersa pondered for a moment, “I suppose you can. Zi, Jahspr and I are going out to celebrate my tenth sweep post transition. You can come! We can make it a double occasion! Celebrate your first sweep on T and my tenth sweep having transitioned.” 

Zoltan’s face lit up excitedly, “I’d love that! I’ll dress real nice. Meet you here at 8?” 

“8 sounds good, Zu, see you then.” 

---

In an alley, an anon wearing an orange sweatshirt throws a match into a dumpster. The dumpster lights up the damp alley in a bright blaze. Kiurii sets his hands on his hips with a proud grin. His moirail pats him on the back. 

“You good now? Got it all outta yer system?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m good now. Let’s go find Major ‘n Aldier, ‘n get some ramen. I’m starvin’.” Kiurii looks up at Vonmar, then turns sharply and heads out of the alley. Vonmar pulls out his palmhusk to ring up their mysterious hitman friend.

While the pair make their way down the deserted streets, a familiar face pokes around the corner. White hair with a fancy sheer shirt, Major meets up with the mismatched duo. Major doesn’t smile, but quietly hands Kiurii a small pin. “I was at Troll Hot Topic today. They had a nonbinary pin. Made me think of you.” Major had even stolen it for the little anon, knowing how much it meant to Kiurii to not pay big companies. The cerulean finally cracked a little smile, and they felt a spark of happiness as Kiruii’s eyes went wide. 

Kiurii was quick to put the pin on his jacket, accidentally stabbing himself a few times. Once completed, he turned to his moirail, “How’s it look Vonnie??” 

“Looks sharp. Lil crooked, but it fits ya.” 

---

A violetblood struggles to climb through the window of a seemingly normal hive in a lowblood neighborhood. He flops onto the floor once inside, and shakes the shock off. His fins are the last to wiggle. 

“Aye! Chow! Chow-ow-ow-ow!” Thunder jumps to his feet quickly, darting out of the room to tackle the short blueblood. Chow, adorned in pajamas and holding a mug of tea, nearly spills said tea as he is tackled. He shoves the violet away with a huff. 

“Dude chill out, I could’ve spilt my tea…” “I could’ve dropped my croissant!” Thunder’s laugh echoed through the empty hive. The massive barkbeast lusus lazily lifts his head. Chow sighs. 

“Yeah, yeah, troll Vine is dead, whatever. Did you need something? It’s been like...a month.” Chow was a bit hurt that the violet never came around anymore. Thunder was always busy with new friends and causing problems. 

Thunder’s eyes softened, and his fins dropped slightly. “Well, it’s T-D-O-V. Remember? I thought I set a reminder on your palmhusk. You’re visible today! I see you!” 

“I see you too, idiot. I’m drinking tea, though. And about to like, sleep or whatever. Come on, let’s go lay down.” Chow grabbed Thunder’s arm with his free hand and gently tugged him into his sleeping block. 

Thunder laid on his back, staring up at the ceiling while Chow sipped at his tea. 

“Chow?” 

“Crosse.” 

“It’s been a long time. We’re so old now.” “I know, it’s weird.” “Chow…?”

“Crosse?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too. Happy Visibility day.”

[pug-bitch]

That’s not why I’m staying (4)

Messes, and a small fire

Book: The Royal Romance, Book 2

Pairing: Drake Walker x Amara Suarez

Rating: some foul language, some extremely suggestive, and a VERY steamy scene, right at the beginning (I guess I now start every chapter with some people getting it on :D). This is absolutely NOT appropriate for people under 18.

Word count: about 3,700 (Sorry for the absence of a Keep Reading option - I’m on mobile!)

Notes: This picks up where we left off, during Liv and Rashad’s date (pre-boeuf bourguignon), starting with Olivia’s POV. This chapter is slightly shorter than my usual ones, but I needed to have a shorter one to get myself back in the spirit of writing for pleasure. I’m sorry I’ve been MIA for a couple of weeks, my job is taking over, and writing is a big part of it, so opening a Word doc has been quite the scary experience. But I’m doing my best, and I intend to keep writing this series, because it makes me happy :) Thank you for sticking with me!!!

*****

Olivia’s lips find Rashad’s and capture them seamlessly. She feels him lean into her kiss, as he closes his eyes and lets out a quiet moan. Fuck, he’s sexy, she thinks. How had she never noticed before? Now she can’t get enough of him.

‘Fuck, Nevrakis,’ he sighs. ‘You’re so hot.’

She smirks and kisses him again, all the while unbuttoning his shirt. Rashad’s hands run down her spine, giving her chills as they do. They grab her ass firmly, and press her further against him. She can very clearly feel his hard cock under his pants. The mere thought of it makes her wet.

She can’t wait anymore. They had multiple makeout sessions, endless flirting, and a lukewarm sex session. She needs the real him, now, or else…

She grinds him more and more intensely, until they both can’t take it any longer. His right hand leaves her ass to find the spot under her dress, between her thighs, and he gently pulls her already wet panties onto the side. Breathlessly, she follows suit and unzips his pants, and quickly pulls down his boxers, finally freeing his big cock. He moans harder onto her kiss.

She can’t wait anymore. He teases her entrance with the tip of his cock, but she wants more, now.

Once he’s completely inside her, they both let out a low groan.

Finally, she thinks. That’s what she’s talking about.

*****

Liam can’t stop his eyelid from twitching. The collar of his white shirt is hurting his neck, suffocating him. He wishes he could just run away and never look back.

His encounter with Drake this afternoon did him a world of good. Finally someone listened to him, not in a fake way like Madeleine used to, when she was trying to seduce him with her pretend compassion.

He has his best friend back. They can count on each other again.

Madeleine is wearing a pre-bridal outfit — white everything. She looks so angelic, Liam himself has trouble believing that she really is a schemer, just from looking at her. But when he thinks back of their awkward, forced interactions… He shudders. No more thinking.

Leo pats him on the back. The two brothers smile at each other. They had a heart-to-heart earlier, and Leo perfectly understood that Liam can’t ask him to be best man, with the history that he and Madeleine share. It felt good to be supported, even by just two people.

Madeleine holds out her hand for Liam to take. Together, they walk onto the platform, surrounded by reporters and various representatives of the Cordonian press. King Constantine is already on the platform, and Liam can’t help but think that he hasn’t really seen his father in motion for a very, very long time. Can he even walk anymore? In any case, he’s good at concealing. If that’s what being a King means, well, Liam won’t be any good. He can feel the beads of sweat dangling over his brow.

His father gives him a curt nod. It’s time.

He clears his throat. ‘People of Cordonia. It is with great pleasure that I officially announce my engagement to Countess Madeleine of Fydelia.’ He turns to Madeleine and they offer each other their fakest smile. ‘We couldn’t be happier about the news, and we look forward to the upcoming festivities. In four days, this Friday, we will depart for our engagement tour, which will stop in Rome, then Paris, then London, finally culminating in a trip to New York City. With us, we will have the pleasure to welcome our wedding parties. Please, Lady Madeleine,’ he says as he turns to her.

She smiles and says, ‘My maid of honor will be Lady Kiara of Castelsarreillan. In my wedding party, I will be delighted to count my fellow former contestants Lady Penelope of Portavira, Duchess Olivia Nevrakis of Lythikos, Lady Hana Lee, and—‘ she pauses and Liam could swear she let a slight smirk show. ‘Lady Amara Suarez.’

The crowd lets out a slight gasp. Liam hurries with his list. ‘And my best man will be my longtime friend Drake Walker. In my wedding party, I am welcoming my brother, former Prince Leo, Duke Bertrand Beaumont of Ramsford, Lord Maxwell Beaumont of Ramsford, and Lord Rashad Domvallier.’ He takes a long breath. ‘Thank you, dear people of Cordonia, for your well wishes. We both wish you all the happiness we are experiencing ourselves, and to all a good night.’

*****

‘Well, I guess it’s official,’ Drake says as he turns off the TV. ‘We gotta do this thing.’

Hana nods as she takes a sip of her wine. ‘Yep. Just the thought of pretending to be helpful to that bitch is giving me hives.’

Drake has to chuckle at Hana’s swearing - he might never get used to it. ‘And I have to be Liam’s freaking best man. Which, like… it’s fine, of course I want to be there for him, but—‘ He trails off. Amara meets his eye.

‘You’re nervous about being in the spotlight,’ she finishes his sentence. He nods. She continues, rubbing Drake’s hand in support. ‘I know, me too, babe. But think about it. It’s for the best. We’ll be on the frontline, ready to pounce if Madeleine shows her hand in the slightest.’

Maxwell nods. ‘Exactly. We’ll be there for each other, too. Oh and, after these drinks, let’s all write our acknowledgements to Liam and Madeleine. That way, tomorrow, we can go to the cabin without a care in the world.’

Drake smiles earnestly. ‘I can’t wait. We all need it. You’ll see, Mike, it’s as calm as what we’ve seen of the coast today, but even more remote.’

Michael smiles excitedly. ‘I’m excited! I’ll take loads of pictures for Callie, she’s been asking about where we are. She’ll love that.’

Drake looks to Amara, who is smiling quietly, a sneaky tear in her eye. Without saying a word, Drake takes her hand again, and squeezes it. He knows how much she’s missed her niece. How badly she wants to be a part of her life again. Drake can’t help but imagine Amara’s family visiting Cordonia, coming to the cabin, having long dinners on the patio, overlooking nature… He may not have much of a family —it’s broken, it spans over two continents and three countries, it’s riddled with lies and unspoken things— but Amara makes him want to fix things. With her folks, with his… He wants their ducks to be in a row.

‘Guys,’ Maxwell whispers dramatically, ‘has anyone heard from Liv?’

This takes Amara out of her daydream, and she replies, ‘Oh, not at all. Let’s hope she’s too busy to text.’ She performs a theatrical wiggling of her eyebrows.

Hana joins in, ‘Maybe she’s just too tied up at the moment.’

Michael nods, a cheeky smile on his face, ‘Maybe she needs to remain on top of things.’

Maxwell, a proud look on his face, chimes in: ‘Maybe she can’t talk because her mouth is full.’

Everyone looks on in horror, until a collective roaring laughter takes over the silence.

‘Holy shit Max,’ Amara says, crying with laughter, ‘too far, honey!’

Michael wipes off a tear, ‘Jeez Maxwell, we were trying to be subtle over here!’

Maxwell shrugs. ‘I just wanted to be a part of it, guys.’

*****

‘Please Michael, go to bed,’ Maxwell waves him off. ‘You don’t need to do all this.’

Michael continues to carry plates from the living room to the sink. ‘No, I want to help! Drake cooked, Amara made the after-dinner drinks, I want to do my part.’ He pauses and makes a charming face at Maxwell. ‘Please.’

Max sighs. Why must they always meet like this, in the kitchen? All Maxwell has ever done in here is messes, and a small fire once —Bertrand still won’t let him use the oven—, but these days, he finds himself drawn to this space. This is where he puts plates together for his friends. Even though he can’t cook, he loves to entertain, and while he happily leaves the roasting and chopping to Drake, Maxwell loves preparing snacks and apéritif trays.

Not to mention the late-night cleanups. Which Michael always joins in on.

He chuckles and busies himself with the dishes. He told everyone else to go to bed, that he’s got it. Truth is, he was kinda hoping this would happen. People going upstairs to pack for tomorrow’s trip, and, if we’re being realistic, Drake and Amara probably going upstairs to get it on. Bertrand went to bed a while ago, as soon as he came home, and that leaves him here, now.

Dammit, he thinks. Why did the girls have to put these ideas in his head?

Well, once again, if we’re being honest, the ideas were already in there, but Maxwell was simply burying them under piles and piles of insecurity, laced with unwavering friendliness.

Maxwell had never been the one in charge before —no one trusts him with anything usually, see the kitchen fire anecdote—, but ever since Michael turned up, it had been Max’s pleasure to show him around, make sure he’s okay, and, most importantly, help him and Amara fix their relationship.

He knows Amara trusts him, and considers him like a brother, which is of course reciprocal. From the moment he told her about Savannah, and instead of judging him for keeping that secret from Drake, she helped him come clean, he’s known that she is a true friend.

So, if she herself is telling him that she sees something between him and Michael, could there be some truth to it?

‘Hey Max,’ Michael says softly, interrupting his incessant internal questions. ‘Is your brother ok?’

Maxwell smiles. ‘Yeah, Bertrand’s fine. He’s just stressed out. He found out that he’s part of the wedding party and needs to come on the Tour, and he’s like Drake in a way. He doesn’t like the spotlight.’

Michael nods. ‘I see. It’s crazy how different you guys are.’ He pauses. ‘I don’t mean that you love the spotlight or anything, but you’re just more...comfortable. In any situation. It’s really admirable, actually.’

Maxwell chuckles and turns back to his dishwashing so Michael can’t see that he’s blushing. ‘Oh, thanks, but it’s nothing, really.’ He bites his lip, annoyed at himself for not finding the right words. It used to be so effortless between them, why did the girls have to fill his head with stupid fantasies?

But Michael doesn’t seem to mind. He sits at the kitchen island and starts putting cookies back in their tins, slowly, one by one, as if he wanted to drag this moment for longer. ‘I’m serious,’ he adds. ‘It takes a lot of guts, and a lot of adaptability, to be able to navigate any social situation without too much anxiety.’

Maxwell turns around to grab another dirty dish. He meets Michael’s eye. ‘Well thank you, but I don’t think I navigate that well. Plus, I was born into it, I guess, so I have no merit. Amara, on the other hand…’

Michael laughs. ‘Yeah, Amara has always been good with people. She’s analytic, too, you know. She figures people out really quickly.’ He pauses and absentmindedly plays with a cookie. ‘Like with Drake. You said he was basically the broody type, right?’

Max smiles. ‘Yeah. Not much of a social butterfly, our Drake.’

Michael chuckles. ‘Right. But I don’t know, around her, he seems to light up. Around us too, actually, when I went on the tour with him this afternoon, he was all friendly and talkative.’

Max puts down the last dish and put the kettle on, without even thinking about it. ‘Yeah. He and I have known each other forever. His sister is one of my closest friends. But before Amara showed up, I don’t know, he didn’t really open up. His dad died ten years ago and he really closed off afterwards.’ Maxwell stops himself. Shit, he thinks. That was a really sensitive topic to tackle, why did he have to talk about death right now?

Michael gets up and sets up two teacups on the island. Maxwell joins him while the kettle does its thing. ‘Well, Amara had closed off, too, as you know,’ Michael responds. ‘Just punished herself. Became a different person. Look, it’s really simple, I hadn’t seen my Amara for two years. But the minute I came here and saw her with you guys, with Drake, I knew. She’s back.’

Maxwell smiles brightly. ‘That’s really beautiful. I like that idea —they found each other and allowed each other to be open again.’

‘Right. But not just the two of them. Amara loves you, and Hana, and Olivia, and Bertrand, too. This isn’t just about Drake and Amara’s love, although that’s the obvious part. It’s more than that, it’s a group effort. You all support each other in ways I didn’t know were possible for people who’ve only been friends for a few months. It’s quite beautiful.’

Maxwell lets the silence wrap them both up, until the aggressive sound of the kettle draws them from their rêverie.

*****

‘Guys, let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!’ Drake yells out from the front door. He’s been ready to go for a while, but Amara is carefully reviewing her bags to make sure she didn’t forget anything. They woke up very early and had a nice breakfast all together—Hana made a frittata—, and now Drake is loading up his Jeep.

‘One second babe,’ Amara responds, ‘Maxwell and Hana are still upstairs.’

Bertrand comes out of his study, and unsnaps his reading glasses. ‘Well, Amara, I wish you a pleasant stay, and I shall see you on Thursday.’

Amara wonders how someone who is under 35 years old has reading glasses that snap in the front. And are tied by a string that goes around his neck. Even her dad wouldn’t wear that. ‘Bertrand,’ she says as she pats his shoulder, ‘are you sure you don’t want to come? We can take two cars, we’d love to have you come with us.’

He blushes. ‘No no, thank you very much for the invitation, Drake insisted too, but I shall get my affairs in order before the tour commences on Thursday. I didn’t expect to be a part of it, you see.’

Amara smiles. ‘If you’re sure. But please, if you change your mind, call us and join us, ok?’

He nods. ‘Will do. Enjoy yourself, please.’

She squeezes his shoulder and heads outside. ‘Drake, relax,’ she says as she rolls her eyes, ‘they’ll be right out.’ She smiles upon seeing Michael outside, already loading his duffle bag into Drake’s Jeep. ‘Well someone else is eager,’ she teases.

Michael smiles, his blue eyes sparkling. ‘I gotta say, this is super exciting. Living in the city doesn’t give you too many opportunities like this one.’ He hops into the backseat.

Amara throws her luggage in the back and settles into the front seat. ‘You know,’ she says to Michael, looking at him in the rearview mirror, ‘you don’t HAVE to live in the city. From what Dad tells me, you have plenty of offers in Philly, you could comfortably live in the suburbs.’

Michael’s smile falters a bit as he nods along. ‘Yeah. I know Callie would love to get closer to Grampie and Grammie. But--’ he interrupts himself and shakes his head. ‘I can’t bring myself to sell the apartment before I find a place that I can really feel at home in. That’s the only home Callie has ever known. I can’t uproot her unless I’m sure.’

Amara nods and stretches her hand towards the backseat, reaching Michael’s knee. ‘You’re right. Sorry. You know best, it’s not my place.’

He grabs her hand. ‘It’s ok. I know it sounds silly, but nothing has clicked yet. Jorge and I visited this beautiful townhouse in Bryn Mawr, which is perfect on paper. I don’t know, it just didn’t work for me, for some reason.’

‘Listen to yourself. To your gut,’ she says. ‘It’ll happen.’

‘Wooooo here we come!’ Maxwell yells out from the front door. ‘Hana, give me your bag!’

He throws both bags in the back and opens the door for Hana, who makes quick eye contact with Amara before saying ‘Oh Max, would you mind getting in the middle? If I’m not near a window I’m gonna get nauseous.’

Amara has to fight the urge to roll her eyes and giggle. Maxwell isn’t wrong --acting must be the one thing Hana sucks at.

‘Sure thing babe,’ Max responds. He gets in right next to Michael, who smiles at him softly.

‘Alright guys,’ Drake says excitedly. ‘Let’s gooooooo!’

*****

‘Father, is everything alright?’ Liam asks, his fingers still rattling the door to ask for permission to enter.

He is met with a faint sound, emanating from his father, who is lying down on his bed, eyes half closed.

He gets closer, his hands shaky. He’s never seen him like this. He knew he had gotten worse, he knew his cancer was terminal, but he didn’t know just how bad it was.

‘Father?’ he asks hesitantly.

‘Li--Liam, you shouldn’t be here, I asked for no one to disturb me today.’ He swallows, but it’s obvious that he’s in pain. ‘Please go.’

Liam gets closer to his father. He feels like crying, but he can’t. Firstly, because it would make his father feel badly. Secondly, because Constantine has never been one to encourage displays of emotion.

‘Father,’ he whispers without making eye contact. ‘Bastien sent for me. He said you told your nurse to leave, and that you refused to take your medicine. Leo and I are concerned. Tell me what happened.’

Constantine rolls his eyes and sits up with tremendous effort. ‘Liam, this is none of your business. If you must know, this medicine is not helping, my pain is unmanageable. Please keep this to yourself, we’re not here for a pity party. The monarchy is strong, don’t let anyone think otherwise.’ He looks his son up and down. ‘How are things with your betrothed?’

Liam feels a pang in his heart. That’s the only thing his father cares about, visibly, and he’s not about to make the situation worse by opening up. ‘Things are fine. I’m hesitant to go on the tour, though, and to leave you alone here.’

Constantine lets a rare smile show on his face. ‘Don’t stay here on my behalf. Go, do your duty. You will come back here after London and attend the Engagement Ball. I’ll be here.’ He nods decisively.

Liam lets out a long sigh. ‘Alright, Father, as you wish.’

*****

‘Welcome, everyone!’ Drake yells out with a smile, as he opens the front door.

Michael takes in the gorgeousness of the scenery, before grabbing his bag from the Jeep. He shouldn’t feel so relaxed and happy without his daughter around, right? But something feels right around here. No stress, obviously, since he has zero responsibilities, and loving, supportive people surrounding him.

A pang of guilt goes through his chest. He should call Callie. Ever since Sergio passed, it’s been the two of them, always together, getting each other through life. Of course, his parents and in-laws are awesome and always around, but at the end of the day, it’s the two of them, the Hansen-Suarezes.

Drake distributes the rooms. Amara stays with him in his original bedroom, Max and Hana share Drake’s younger sister’s, and Michael is allotted the master bedroom.

‘Make yourself at home, Mike,’ Drake says to him softly. ‘I’ll let you get situated, if you need anything, let me know.’

‘Thank you so much,’ Michael replies gratefully. ‘This is amazing. I’ll be down soon, I wanna check in with my daughter really quickly.’

Drake nods. ‘Of course. Amara and I will be downstairs preparing drinks and snacks.’

Michael puts his bag down and opens it. Most of the clothes inside are too formal, too lawyery, but he notices that Maxwell snuck a couple of outfits in there for him. A note is pinned to a pair of jeans.

They suit you better than they suit me. All yours! :)

Michael smiles warmly. Maxwell never ceases to be thoughtful. He’d have to remember to buy him something as a thank you. Drake could help him sneak out and pick something.

He picks up his phone and dials Jorge’s number. His father-in-law’s warm voice picks up.

‘Hi sweetheart. Is everything ok?’

‘Hi Jorge, I’m doing great, how are you?’

‘Great,’ he says, ‘we’re in the countryside at Drake’s cabin for a couple of days.’

‘Wonderful, dear, is Amara ok too?’

Michael smiles. ‘Doing great, Jorge. You can rest assured, she is very happy here.’

Jorge’s voice lights up. ‘That’s so good to hear.’ He pauses. ‘Callie, sweetie, it’s your daddy. Come chat with him for a bit.’

Michael feels himself regenerate as he talks to his daughter. The conversation is short, it basically revolves around how much she loved going to Dilworth Park with Grampie and Grammy, and how fun it was playing in the fountain. Michael hangs up with a light heart.

He was silly to feel like a bad dad, just because he felt relaxed without her. Ever since Callie was born, he has been a reliable and loving father, who managed to maintain as stable a life for Callie as he could, after Sergio’s death. He juggled all the grueling paperwork, the grief, and the parenting duties, making sure she had enough love, hugs, support, tenderness in her life.

If anyone was good at being a widower, it was Michael. It fucking ruined his life, but he handled it like a champ. Stable in the face of adversity. Always even, only letting his feelings overflow when it came to his sister-in-law, whose grief he could not handle too well.

He had been stable. But not happy.

Of course, Callie makes him happy. She’s the light of his life, and always will be.

But he’d been on autopilot.

Seeing Amara actually thrive as her life got ridiculous and out of control had been eye opening. Maybe he needed that, too. Just for a while.

*****

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Thank you for your encouragements, everyone! Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist :)

[blue-tongue]

Examining the Group Dynamic of the Seven

      I feel like I see a lot of posts complaining about the lack of friendship between the various seven members. Since I have an ungodly about of time on my hands, I’ve taken it upon myself to take a deep dive into all of the friendships between them. 

       Before anything, I should note- there are seven main characters in this series- Percy, Annabeth, Jason, Piper, Leo, Frank, and Hazel. That means you have twenty one relationships you have to develop (each of the seven times each of their viewpoint on the other six divided by two to make the relationship go both ways). 

I’m going to breakdown how their relationships develop book by book-

1) The Lost Hero (TLH)- POVs: Jason, Piper, Leo

Percy and Annabeth- well developed from the previous series.

Jason and Piper- complicated as frick. Since Hera just happened to plant fake memories of their relationship in Piper’s head, there’s this awkward one-sided relationship going on while they have crushes on each other. Percabeth started on a clean slate and had four years to slowly come together. Jiper is condensed into one book/quest, meaning that their relationship has less time to develop.

Jason and Leo- Best friends. Similar Percy/Grover in the sense that Jason is supposed to be the HeroTM and Leo doesn’t fit the archetype as much.

Piper and Leo- Sibling-esque friendship.

Piper and Annabeth- Beginning a best friend relationship

Jason and Annabeth/ Leo and Annabeth- Acquaintances I guess? They have to work together? They might call each other friends but only in the vaguest sense of the word? They’re work colleagues?

2) Son of Neptune (SoN)- POVs: Percy, Hazel, Frank

Percy and Hazel- Big brother/ protective friendship. Hazel literally thought Percy was a god when they first met. It should be noted that Percy sees the chemistry between Hazel and Frank and starts ashipping like there’s no frigging tomorrow.

Percy and Frank- Friends. Percy sees Frank’s potential besides his deep insecurities. Percy serves as the older, more experienced (although he can’t remember his experiences) one. Again, Percy is a huge Frazel shipper. 

Hazel and Frank- Everything that is good and pure in this world.

3) Mark of Athena (MoA)- POVs: Annabeth, Percy, Piper, Leo

The group is finally together! Yeehaw!

Things that happened in the time jump between TLH and MoA:

Piper and Annabeth- Best friends

Piper and Jason- Have a stabler relationship. Congrats on that.

Things that happened in the book:

Percy and Annabeth- !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I can’t describe it better than this)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Percy and Jason- BROS. Little bit competitive because they’re both alphas, but BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOS

Leo and Hazel- Long sigh. Leo is a carbon copy of Hazel’s ex (from seventy years ago) and Leo’s like oh. Hazel’s kinda pretty. I mean she has a boyfriend sure I respect that but still. Pretty. (Turns out she’s his great grandpa’s girlfriend. wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.)

Leo and Frank- They start of great. Frank is paralyzed with fear that Leo’s going to steal his girlfriend and then murder him with fire. Leo spends the entire book teasing Frank without realizing this. Yey.

Annabeth and Frank- The have one scene together where Annabeth’s like “Aw look at this adorable manchild” and that’s pretty much it. 

Leo and Percy- Leo’s kinda disappointed that Percy’s so basic. Percy’s big brother instinct kicks in and he’s like “Listen here lil’ punk *jabs finger into Leo’s chest* if you lay one hand on Hazel and break up this pure relationship I SWEAR TO THE GODS-”

Piper and Percy- Piper’s kinda disappointed that Percy’s so basic. Percy’s like okay. Her. My girlfriend’s friend. We’re work colleagues. She’s okay I guess. 

Also as a side note:

Annabeth thinks Nico has a crush on her 

4) House of Hades (HoH)- POVs: Hazel, Annabeth, Leo, Percy, Frank, Jason (literally everyone except Piper WOW)

Percy and Annabeth- Surviving through Tartarus. There’s So Much Development To Their Relationship. Downside being Dark! Percy. Which isn’t really acknowledged as much as it should be. Like do they ever really talk heart to heart about it? No?

Leo and Hazel- Leo gets a girlfriend so he stops his weird soft pining @ Hazel. 

Leo and Frank- Frank’s not scared of Leo stealing his girlfriend and then murdering him with fire because he now has a ^girlfriend^ and Leo gave him a fire-proof pouch thing for his stick. 

Hazel and Frank- Frank’s hot now so... yeah!

Leo and Percy- .....So we’ve both on Calypso’s Island, huh? 

Piper and Hazel- They... apparently practice sword fighting? I mean, it’s not much but it’s something? Points for that?

Jason and Frank- They bond over being praetor/ roman although WE DON’T GET TO SEE THEM ACTUALLY HAVE THAT CONVERSATION DO WE RICK? 

Bonus relationships:

It should be noted that although I love Nico, he really isn’t one of the seven. I think Rick originally intended him to be a secondary character like he was in the first series, but then he became a main character. This wouldn’t be a problem except Rick is having enough trouble juggling the seven on their own.

Nico and Percy- SO SOMEONE HAS A CRUSH (although honestly wow doesn’t have a crush on Percy at this point). Their relationship is still strained from the last series.

Jason and Nico- Jason is basically Nico’s supportive Straight AllyTM/ Life Coach/ Mom who wants to grab Nico by the Ramones t-shirt, shake him a bit, tell him that there there are millions of queer kids in the world finding love everyday, that he’s his own worst enemy, he needs to get away from the underworld, go outside, make some friends, stop hating Percy, get some hobbies and then who knows maybe he’ll develop a disposition that others find more approachable (yes this is Contrapoints reference thank you for noticing)

5) Blood of Olympus (BoO)- POVs: Jason, Reyna, Leo, Nico, Piper (Note that Percy, Annabeth, Frank, and Hazel are not included >:((((()

Jason and Piper- Their relationship is developed a little bit. They work together the most out of all of the seven to defeat Gaia. They say I love you to each other at the end of the book (*represses all my knowledge of Trials of Apollo for the sake of this post*) Except for Leo’s “death”, everything’s great! 

Percy and Annabeth- Everything’s fine. Percy’s fine. Percy doesn’t have a dark side. Nope. “If I can’t drown neither can my pancakes!” Haha. Ha. Funny. 

Piper and Annabeth-  Let me cup your face, pull you forward until our foreheads are touching, and feel your rapid pulse as I whisper softly, “Fear can’t be reasoned with. Neither can hate. They’re like love. Stop thinking about it. Just feel. Let it scare you. Trust that it’ll be okay anyway”~

Leo and Percy- They address the Calypso thing (in the middle of a battle). So. You know. They’re on okay terms I guess?

Piper and Frank- Frank goes and “Brings the family full circle” offscreen and he’s like ‘yeah they didn’t like me because I’m not white’ and Piper’s like ‘well white people do suck sometimes’

Leo and Hazel/Frank- Oh hi I know we just resolved the awkwardness between us a few seconds ago but can collude with me on this top secret plan in which I’ll die and then maybe (if we play are cards right) come back to life? 

Bonus relationships:

Hazel and Nico: They’re cute siblings and I love them

Reyna and Nico: They’re cute adoptive siblings that have shared trauma and I love them.

Nico and Percy: Nico comes out. Percy’s confused because he doesn’t understand how internalized homophobia works (Wait... but you hated me... but then... you liked me this whole time??? What?????)

Nico and Annabeth: Oh I guess you didn’t have a crush on me then. Well. Good for you anyway *high five*

Nico and Will: SOLANGELO!!!!!  *rainbow flags*

Nico and Jason: Aw Jason’s so proud of him. 

Reyna and Piper: Reyna! Doesn’t! Need! A! Man! To! Be! Happy! She Has Friends! And Two Camps! They can get some sleep now! Wheeeeee!

In Conclusion, the Underdeveloped Relationships Are:

Percy, Piper, & Leo BROTP

Annabeth and Hazel

Piper and Hazel

Annabeth and Jason

Annabeth and Leo

Jason and Frank

Jason and Hazel

Piper and Frank

       All in all of the underdeveloped dynamics, you’re really left to believe that they’re just acquaintances fighting in the same war together. And I honestly believe that Rick just gave himself too many characters to work with. That, and tacking on two major characters in the end of the second to last book made a lot of the developments of Blood of Olympus feel rushed and weak. We call them the Seven, but honestly, it’s really the Nine. Part of what I really enjoy about this fandom is that people fill in the gaps and try to make all the interconnected friendships within the nine main characters really strong.

  In PJO, there was only one POV- Percy’s- and each book consisted of a core group of three or four characters going on one major quest together. The simplicity of both the narrative and group dynamic made developing character relationships more straight forward. Although the alternating POVs in HoO allows for more complex characterization and group dynamics, it’s a hard ship (pun intended) to handle.  The structure of a core group of three characters going on one major quest continues in TLH and SoN, but dissolves when all the characters come together in MoA. The sheer number of main characters mean that characters and character relationships get starved of development. Riordan has himself said that although he loved all his characters, having he regretted having so many.