#Like I've technically been there for three years and still I'm stuck in this position

[olimabelss]

Should I, or should I not, quit my job without having something else lined up?

[minhosimthings]

I dont know if you accept a req now but... fresh grad worker! (jake or hyunjin) × ojt student y/n. Y/n was assigned to (jake or hyunjin) to train her but yn like riding (jake or hyunjin) in his swivel chair. (Jake or Hyunjin)'s work desk cubicle is in kinda hidden in the corner. (cockwarming, cowgirl, softdom!(jake or hj))

Me quedo Mirandote || 18+

Pairings: Hyunjin × fem!reader

Warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI, 18+, thigh riding, degradation, 1% sir kink because I can, orgasm control eyy, cock riding, unprotected sex (zont zo it), mention of blood, fingering, praise, semi-public sex, role-play ish situation?, Use of petnames 'doll', overstimulation, dom!Hyunjin, sub!reader, swearing, reader wears a dress

A/N: This was such a hot thing to write omg I love your brain annonie. Also I am shit at writing riding things so FORGIVE ME IF ITS NOT SATISFACTORY. Also for my beloved @astraystayyh (who is probably still stuck with Hyune's ponytail)

Never in a million years would you ever have thought that you'd be fixing your frizzied hair and ruined lipstick in your soon-to-be office's bathroom, but here you were, your lipstick three shades lighter and your white dress all ruined.

And no one would ever question how Hwang Hyunjin's shirt had the exact same lipstick shade stains on it. Why would they? A playboy never loses his instincts, even if he's freshly graduated and teaching the only on- the-job student with full responsibility.

The fortunate student being you.

And it wasn't to say Hyunjin wasn't fortunate as well. You were compliant, perhaps even exactly like him. He wondered how you had ever managed to get through your classes so well during the day and get through him during the cool intoxicating nights.

Another thing Hyunjin was fortunate to have was his "private office". And by office, he meant his own comfortably small cubicle, which was far away from the prying eyes of his co-workers. It was weird for a fresh out of school student to have his own cubicle, but he guessed that his workplace valued privacy to an extreme level, so much so that his "office" hid discarded red laces, tainted white silks and on the job students perfectly.

"And that's how you write up a summary for the graphs of the month." Hyunjin clapped his hands together, trying not to sound overly positive, as you stared dead eyed into the computer screen. Hyunjin had been explaining the concept to you for an hour now, and although you'd been standing resting your chin on his head, you were mentally exhausted.

"Doll, you doing alright?" Hyunjin cocked a brow at you, standing up to your level, arms going to your waist as if it was his daily routine. Well, technically it was his daily routine.

"Do I look like I'm doing alright?" You scoffed, eyes flittering between Hyunjin's eyes and lips, "Don't I deserve a promotion for all the work I've done Sir?"

Hyunjin's lips morphed into a slow smirk at your widened lamb eyes and your 'good girl' pout. His hands gripped into your skin tighter, as he leaned in closer, pressing a kiss to your neck.

"You're just a student Y/N. I can't give you a promotion so quick." He smirked into the nape of your neck, knowing what was coming next. How couldn't he? With how many times, his favourite 'employee' had begged on her knees to get a 'promotion'.

"But sir haven't I been a good girl?" You whispered, staring at Hyunjin's plump lips, "I even wore the dress you bought me." You motioned towards your clearly visible cleavage in your summer dress, one of Hyunjin's most favourite painting topics.

Your hands went up to his luscious locks of hair, which were tied up into a ponytail with two flicks framing his face perfectly. God, his hair was as soft as cotton, you thought, a complete contrast to how he behaved once you were suffocating his length with your pussy.

Hyunjin's hands slid down to your ass and pulled your hips against his body, your hand pressing against his desk. It made the dress you were wearing ride up your thighs, exposing your panties. His hot lips moved away from yours and down to your neck, kissing and gently biting the delicate skin. You let out a little gasp and arched your neck, it felt divine.

“Doll, with the way you're gasping now, I wonder what you'd do once I actually start with the usual." Hyunjin chuckled darkly, pressing a rough, carnivorous kiss to your lips, "fuck—be a good girl for me now."

Hyunjin pulled away from the kiss and sat back on his chair, leaning as prosaic as he could against it, and rubbing his hand over his thigh, ever so cordially inviting you over to him. Why would you ever refuse? It was your favourite place to be at any chance you got. Some days, that's the only place you wanted to be, on a hot lazy day, when you wanted nothing more than Hyunjin to shut up about presentations and slides and spread out his leg for you.

You manoeuvred yourself so that your covered but damp core met with Hyunjin's thigh, the hem of your dress gracefully swooped over his thigh, as you parted your legs enough to let your clit brushing against the fabric. The contact caused your mouth to fall open in a silent sigh.

"Already?" Hyunjin clicked his tongue, "That's sort of pathetic don't you think doll?"

From this angle you looked pretty to Hyunjin with your head thrown back, pupils blown out with lust and a prominent blush on your face. It made the animalistic side in Hyunjin, ravenous for more.

Hyunjin adjusted his position on the chair, your loud mewl made him chuckle and press a kiss to your forehead. You hands went up to grip his soft, ebony hair, which was tied perfectly in a ponytail. Well, tied perfectly, until you ran your hands through the follicles, throwing the hair band off, and continuing to grip his open hair tightly. Your grip made Hyunjin silently moan.

"Feel that?" He lifted a cocky brow at your pleasured expression, "It's just for you, doll."

Slowly you began rocking your hips back and forth, letting your clit get maximum friction against the clothed barriers. Your hands gripped at his shirt now tightly, leaving tiny creases all along as you chased your release.

Somewhere along the way, Hyunijn had abandoned his work and had turned all of his attention on you, gripping your hips harshly, digging marks, guiding it along his thigh while pressing open mouthed kisses along your shoulder and neck. The chair was creaking worse than a wooden bed, but there wasn't a care in the world for that.

Hyunjin's hands move up your thighs towards your hips pushing you harder against his thigh gaining more melodic moans from your mouth.

You rut yourself faster against him, moaning louder and louder until you finally reach what you thought was your peak.

"Hyunjin," you whined, his kisses descend even further down your body, lips at the top of your chest, eyes peering up into your desperate and pleading eyes.

"Fuck," you sigh out, when Hyunjin grabs your breast, lavishing it an equal amount of attention, his hands moving your hips harder and faster against him, your orgasm building swiftly at his actions.

"Beg for it darling." Hyunjin's sadistic smile hit your face, "Be a good slut, and beg for your cum."

"Hyune-fuck!" You moaned out as his thigh gave a little flick upwards, "please Hyunjin—"

"So desperate," he mumbles, tone laced with dominance, hands gliding across the back of your thighs, teasing you. "So wet," he adds, doing as you asked and sliding his finger across your clothed core, a sinful groan escaping you, head lolling back against.

"Come for me," he husks out, letting you fall over the edge with a guttural moan, back arching, as your legs trembled, hips rocking at the pleasure that filled you. A pleasant buzz consumed your body as you rode out the aftershocks of your powerful release, your body practically going limp on his thigh at the exhaustion of coming so hard.

Your chest rose and fell with every unsteady breath, as you steadied yourself on Hyunjin's thigh, leaning your head towards his shoulder, from how dizzy you were. Being a cowgirl really took a lot of energy from you.

As you were getting ready to stand up, you felt Hyunjin's arm grip ours tightly.

"So soon, pretty?" He pulls you in for a rough kiss, biting your lip, he could taste salty blood on them, "I'm not even half done."

“Come here,” Hyunjin demanded as he pulled your arm. You move around from the back of the chair as he pushes it out a bit from the table.

“Oh baby. Aren’t you just deliciously naughty?” he says as his finger slips in between your folds to find you positively dripping. “Is this all for me?” he asks as he starts to rub your clit in slow circular movements. The stimulation was killing you, yet you obliged, dumbly nodding along to Hyunjin's words.

“So greedy,” he whispers. He slips his finger from your pussy, his hands come up to your shoulders, and he pushes the dress off of them.

“Come here and sit on my cock,” he says with that lopsided smirk you love so much.

Lifting yourself up a little, you line him up with your entrance, and then you sit back down and let him slide into your wet, needy pussy. Filling you so perfectly. Stretching you completely. You slowly sink down onto him, as he grips your waist harder, holding you down.

“You can take it.” He moans out. He slowly pushes himself in a little more, and you swear you hear him whimper. You cry out, laying down on his chest.

“Shit!” He goes inch by inch, and you groan louder and louder as he fills you out.

"Fuck,” Hyunjin groans. And then you start to move. Slowly, up and down. Your hands rest on his hair for leverage as you bounce yourself on his cock.

Your tight grip on his hair makes Hyunjin throw his head back slightly, his eyes almost rolling to the back with the sheer amount of pleasure he was recieving from your hands running through his locks.

"Fuck—baby keep doing that." He mumbles, not even sure if you've heard it, you probably did as was evident from your now tighter grip, your fingers dancing their pretty ballet through Hyunjin's velvety hair.

Hyunjin grabs a tight hold of your hips, and he lifts you up a little before he starts to thrust up into you. Harder and faster than you managed. Pounding into you over and over.

"Fuck—Hyunjin!" You gasp, a little louder than usual, "touch me—please." Your begs elated Hyunjin, how could he refuse? He shakes his hand from your hip and presses his fingers to your cunt.

His motions on your clit are as frantic as his thrusts into you. Pushing you closer and closer to the edge.

And with a final buck into you so deep that he nudged your cervix as his thumb pressed down on your clit, you both cum. Hard and fast.

Your hips gyrated harder, until the spurring had come close; hot liquid squirted on his cock. The orgasm rips through you at such intensity that your eyes roll into the back of your head, and you scream out his name. His cock twitches as his cum spurts inside you.

Hyunjin tilts his head to rest on your chest as he tries to catch his breath, and he moans out your name. You kiss him softly at the top of his head. Your fingers are raking through his hair as you try to calm your own breathing down to normal.

"You've made such a mess." Hyunjin chuckled, pressing his forehead to yours, "my messy girl."

"How about those graphs now, Mr Hwang?" You asked, a tint of cockishness smeared in your voice.

"Graphs?" Hyunjin laughed, gripping your hips again.

"We're not even a quarter done yet, doll."

[mangodestroyer]

Applying for remote internships, but regardless of whether or not I have a job lined up, I'm just going to have to leave my current position soon after the holidays are over. It's been two and a half years and I've BEEN sick of this retail job. And it's really not getting any better.

I just can't imagine having another in-person job. Let alone another public facing customer service job that's physical. I'm starting to see more health problems come up, I've dealt with harassment from both staff and customers at both of my retail jobs (the only jobs I've worked), and being off for six days straight kind of just reminded me that it's really just this job weighing me down right now. Seriously, I feel like I found part of my personality again having so many days off.

Thank God I'm a math major. Thank God higher level math is such a sought after skill. As well as coding. Literally, at this point, I will pick up as many skills as necessary to get myself a remote office job. I don't even mind learning these skills. I love them even more now that I've gotten a good taste of retail (seriously, being stuck doing tons of boring ass, mindless busy work, dealing with dull or rude individuals, and listening to shit music all day in a grey, poorly decorated environment for two and a half years will make you so open minded and excited about any positive stimulation).

I just can't imagine doing this for another year. It's not happening. Three years is plenty long enough for retail. I wouldn't wish this on most people. My advice is to just not bother with customer service if you can help it. Just do volunteer, network, build up a skill while you're still very young and go straight into something else. I knew people right out of hs who did just that and they're much better off. I also worry that customer service doesn't really do much to get you into a more technical job. I hear people say, "Employers will like that you worked while you were in school and stuck with a place for over two years." But I really doubt that tbh. If anything, it's only gotten me recommended more customer facing jobs (I got emailed about possibly becoming a math teacher, which probably would be good for a strong math background and customer service, but no, I'm too autistic and introverted and would rather clean toilets and not talk to anyone than deal with stupid ass Karens and their poorly disciplined kids, while getting underpaid).

People who do customer service their whole life deserve the fucking world. Except for shitty, abusive managers who try to make these jobs even more unbearable. They can eat shit.

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #152

boyfriend survey

What’s his first name? Donald Jr., but I've only ever known him as Girt.

Does his surname begin with the same letter as yours? No.

How old is he? 29 and thinks he's basically 60 lol dude you are still in the youth of your life

How long have you been together? A year and eight months.

Do you have a casual or serious relationship? Serious.

How often do you see each other? At least once a week, sometimes maybe one more day. In very rare cases it's gotten past a week, and then I'm just miserable lol

Do you live together? Not yet.

Do you have keys to each other’s places? I know I don't, and I don't think Girt does either, but maybe Mom's given him one at some point.

When was the last time you saw him? Uh it's been like... around five days?

What is the age gap between you? Is he older or younger than you? Two or three years, I can't math, like he's gonna be 30 before I turn 28, but right NOW he's two years older.

Have you met his parents? His mom, yes, his dad died before I ever met his family.

Has he met your parents? Yes.

How many siblings does he have? One sister.

Have you met his siblings? Yes, she's fantastic.

Has he met your siblings? Ashley and Nicole, definitely, and I feeeeel like he's actually met Katie once at Nicole's birthday party many many years ago? I know he hasn't met Bobby, and I'm quite sure not Misty either.

What’s his name in your phone? "Girt <3"

Have you talked about marriage? Yeah, it's not an uncomfortable topic for us, we're both very open about being in this for the long run, especially with just how long we've been friends, though being a couple is obviously different.

Does he have any kids? No.

Does he want kids? I don't think so, but since hearing him say he didn't early in our relationship, he's since said "every guy wants a daughter" when talking casually about kids and that he'd prefer one over a son, but I don't know exactly how he meant that, like how relevant it was to his own, actual life.

Do you see a future with him? Yeah.

Are you “Facebook official”? lol not technically, it's stuck on "pending" because he's never been one to pay attention to Facebook at all, dude barely even knows how things work on there, so he missed the notification to verify it at some point, but thankfully it doesn't bother me, he puts no effort into hiding we're together at all, and that's what matters.

How did you meet him? High school band.

Where did you go for your first date? It was actually bowling, the first time we tried dating, but during our current and much more "real" relationship, it was uhhhh... wow I'm not sure I remember.

Who was the first one to make a move? Originally, him; he asked me out the first time, but I asked him out this go, but I only had the guts to because I was pretty confident he felt the same still, lol.

Have you spoken to him today? On Discord, yes; we do that every day. I haven't verbally spoken to him.

What’s his favorite pizza topping? With our history I'm actually amazed I'm not positive on this haha, I wanna just say pepperoni though?

Does he cook? He knows how to cook two things and that's it, lol. Still better than me.

What sort of phone does he have? Some sort of good quality Android, idk the details.

What size is his bed? I literally still haven't seen his room lmfao, I'm not sure.

Does he like to be big spoon or little spoon when you cuddle? Big spoon, but there are definitely times in bed when he faces away I'm cuddling against him, he finds it hard to fall asleep facing/cuddling me.

Is he a good kisser? Yeah.

Does he make you happy? He absolutely does, more than anyone else is able to.

What’s his fashion style? Comfort haha, regular pants and t-shirts, particularly Saikou brand stuff.

Does he drive? If so, what sort of car? Yes, but I forget what it is. It's black.

Has he ever bought you an item of clothing? Haha he's wanted to before actually but I was too reluctant to share my shirt size, regardless of how stupid that is.

Does he have any piercings? No.

Is he more fun or serious? Fun.

What does he do for a living? He's worked at a big tire factory for like, nine years.

When is the next time you’ll see him? Probably within the next few days.

What’s his favorite thing to drink? Water, this man can destroy water.

Does he live alone, with roommates or with parents? Well it's technically her living with him, but his mom. Actually one of his best friends does too because of familial problems.

Does he have any pets? Yeah, he has a super sweet pit/shepherd mix named Charlie.

Is he your first boyfriend? No.

What was the last movie you watched with him? Wow I have no idea, we don't watch movies much, which is fine with me because I have a hard time getting through movies anyway.

Is he an active person? Well his job is physical and he has long shifts so kinda, but he doesn't do much outside of work.

What’s his favorite candy? Good question, he doesn't let himself have candy a lot at all. I do know he loves Sour Patch, though.

Have you ever met his best friend? Yes.

What’s your favorite physical quality of his? He has an adorable smile, and I like his arms/shoulders.

What color is his hair? Black but graying early and he haaates it.

Do you argue with him often? No, that's really rare for us.

Where was the last place you went with him? Red Robin for Mother's Day.

What color is his toothbrush? Don't know actually.

What kind of movies does he like to watch? Also a good question, but I can tell you he's not a horror fan.

Have you celebrated either of your birthdays together? Yeah.

Does he play any instruments? He was the guy who played tuba in band, and briefly the trombone before I started high school, but I'm doubtful he remembers anything by now.

Do you have any mutual friends? Yes.

How often do you talk to him on the phone? Basically never, I've learned that there have been times he's wanted to call me just to talk but doesn't just because he knows I hate talking on the phone haha, like dude you're an exception.

Does he have a beard or is he clean-shaven? He never has a full beard, genetically he doesn't get a lot of facial hair, but sometimes he has a little bit but generally stays shaved.

What was the last compliment he gave you? I'm not sure, even though he gives 'em quite a bit. We call each other cute a whole lot, so there's a good chance it was that, haha.

Does he dance? No, he's told me he can't and bitch same

Is he taller or shorter than you? He's quite a lot taller.

Has he ever bought you flowers? Twice now. :'D

Do you ever borrow his clothes? No, I doubt his shirts would even fit me; I weigh a lot more than him, although with how tall and broad he is, some shirts might but I kinda don't wanna try and find out they don't lol

Is he a clean or messy person? He knows he's messy and it's the reason I haven't seen his room yet lol, he doesn't believe me when I say I don't care.

What color are his eyes? Brown.

What does he wear to bed? Pj pants and a normal shirt or sometimes no shirt, he'll sometimes change into new work clothes the night before and just sleep in them so he can have more time asleep lol, extremely rarely nothing.

Does he keep his fingernails clean? Reasonably, but I mean he works in a tire factory with the tires so they're not like pristine.

Have you ever shared a shower with him? No, I don't want to share a shower with anyone.

How long after your first date did you see him again? I don't remember, but I'm sure it wasn't that long.

What’s his bedroom like? As mentioned earlier, I actually don't know.

Has he ever had braces? Uhhh I don't think so? I know he hasn't while I've known him.

When was the last time you kissed him? The last time he was here, a few nights ago.

Do you celebrate Valentine’s Day with him? Yes.

How long were you together before you said “I love you”? We never did the first time we tried dating years ago, which was around four months, and I can't quite remember how long it was until I said it and he said it back. It was definitely a few months, though.

What sort of shoes does he usually wear? Sneakers of some sort, I don't pay attention to exactly what they are.

Do you know any of his exes? No.

What’s his favourite cuisine? I'm not certain, but I know he likes Mexican quite a bit.

Was he born in the country he now lives in? Yes.

Have you ever been long-distance with him? No.

Does he ever wear any type of jewelry? No.

What was the first present you got for him? I'm not certain, it really might have been the Vitamin Me thing I got for our first anniversary, because I absolutely couldn't NOT get him something so I sucked it up and asked my mom, I'm still the one that made all the little notes, what really made up the gift.

What was the first present he got for you? ugh this is much harder, he's actually gotten a lot, apparently gifts are one of the stronger love languages from him. I want to say it was a Carbuncle from Final Fantasy plush, the first time we dated; I saw a picture of one and freaked out over how cute it was and then he fuckin showed up with it lmao, I still want to get him out of the bags with my other stuffed animals to keep out.

Does he smoke? No.

What TV shows is he watching at the moment? I don't think he's actively watching anything at home; it's usually us watching stuff together, and we've yet to start a new show since we just finished one.

Have you ever visited him at work? Yes, there was one day I brought him lunch.

Does he play video games? Oh yes, that's his "thing," he loves games.

What was the last thing you argued about? Well it wasn't really an argument since he agreed with me immediately, but he made a bad joke that just shouldn't have been made and it upset me.

Is he straight? Yes.

When is his birthday? I don't feel right sharing that on here.

Have you ever shared a bath with him? No.

Does he ride a motorcycle? No.

How long is his hair? Not very long, but it's not suuuuper short either. He has really thick hair like me and it's also curly, so while it doesn't actually like hang down his neck, there's a good deal of it.

Have you ever been overseas with him? No.

Does he have any tattoos? If so, which one is your favorite? Not yet, but he wants some. I know he'd like a big one on his back and he likes the idea of having a sleeve.

What is his favorite alcoholic beverage? He's never drunk and isn't interested.

Does he speak any languages other than English? He took quite a bit of Spanish in school and remembers some of it, but he's definitely not fluent.

Is he college/university educated? Mostly, yes, but he dropped out during his last semester because of his dad's death, it became way too much. He wants to go back eventually.

How long have you known him? Over a decade, I don't know the exact years by this point.

Does he text back quickly? If he's not at work, generally, yes, he messages back quickly. Off work though he will occasionally get distracted and forget to reply, he's one of those people that can read a message and then forget to message back by the time he can, but it doesn't happen a bothersome amount.

Have you ever celebrated Christmas with him? Not Christmas day, we spend it with our own immediate families.

Has he ever been in a physical fight? He's either been in one when younger or none at all, I can't remember which. I know he hit another guy once as a child because he wasn't leaving him alone, but I feel like he may have mentioned fighting with a guy once? I don't remember.

Did you go to the same high school as him? Yes, that's where we met.

[starryyyjoon]

I, you | Kim Namjoon One Shot

word count: 8.2k

pairing: idol!namjoon x fem reader

summary: namjoon meets you again and he can't help but want you to look at him the same way he has all these years.

disclaimer: it's sort of written from y/n pov. kind of smut included, not too much but still. other then that, i don't think there's anything. it was written a long time ago so i don't clearly remember, sorry!

Namjoon walked in, followed by a few staff members and they occupied the empty chairs on the conference table and I smiled at him and the others. He looked great like always, he was in a navy blue hoodie and a khaki colored trouser, with his hair pushed backwards exposing his forehead.

There was something and nothing between me and him and it was too tiring to play pretend. "You look good", he remarked and I smiled at him. He's always being too kind, I looked like absolute shit, I hadn't slept in three days and my clothes were whatever was in my reach that I'd put on after showering and I rushed here.

I had met him before this level of success but I was merely an assistant director myself and we'd talked about Monet and his work together, he'd similar interests to mine but both of us didn't really get anywhere because of our timing and I believed it was for the good. He'd always expressed how he liked my vision and wants to work with me on something and I didn't believe my vision because what even was my vision that he could see and not me and after being this big I didn't really thought he'll even remember me until he hit my phone one day and here I was, at the label's office to discuss the details of his mixtape's music video.

"So, do you've something in mind?", I asked him and he pressed his back on the chair letting out a yawn, he seemed tired.

"Not really! I want it simplistic and not too hard to understand. I haven't thought about it or anything so I don't know, I would await what you propose", he softly said.

"I haven't heard the track because of--", he intervened, "--ah you haven't? You should hear it first", he said and I nodded.

"I would need to hear it", I told him, thinking about the lengthy talks with the illustrator already.

The staff then pin pointed about the budget, the do nots and other details and two of my team members who were seated beside me talked thoroughly in detail about the technicalities. Namjoon looked bored with all the talk that didn't interest him. He wasn't much different from before slightly bigger.

All of us stood up coming to an agreement when Namjoon asked me to walk up to his studio to hear the track and I asked my team members to go ahead first. I walked through the dark corridor behind him while he talked to someone on the phone, all the way to his studio. I didn't really hear what he was talking because I was invested in staring around the place like I hadn't seen a building before.

The walls were all dark and a comforting shade since I didn't like the sun anyway. It seemed like a night mode in real life.

His studio was the corner most, he typed the passcode in and stood aside gesturing for me to walk in, followed by him. He hung up the phone call and put his phone aside, switching the AC on. He sat behind the monitor while he switched it on and I went through my inbox.

"So, how have you been?", his deep tone, made me look up and I fidgeted to put my eyes on something other then him while he turned his chair around to face me.

"I have been okay-ish, like the projects I'm doing I'm satisfied with them so I guess it's kinda okay", I said and regretted it immediately, I don't even talk like this and he knows it.

"Not the work c'mon, you, your boyfriend, family, other things?", a lose smile hung on his lips and I looked at him. How can someone look like that?

"No boyfriend because you know no one can put up with this profession. I haven't slept in three days so I'm fucking annoyed and the work is too much that I don't have time for other things", I shrugged and he chuckled. I didn't want to think about guys, I barely had time for myself. Filmmaking was a time bound profession.

"I relate, trust me I do", he turned his chair back around, his eyes on the computer screen and I looked at him. I could see why he could relate, I mean of course he didn't had time either. I knew idol schedules enough to know how these things go. "Why didn't you come that day?", he asked me and my insides twisted.

"I was hoping you don't bring it up", I said in a small voice.

"Why not? I waited for you", he said without looking at me and I threw my head back on the couch thinking of the time when he'd asked me out officially and I didn't make it. "At least I deserve to know what was more important that you didn't make it", he looked at me and I closed my eyes shut.

"I had a flight, I got an exclusive food show travel experience with discovery and it was too good for an opportunity to miss", I let it out and took a breath in. I knew I could never leave work for a guy, any guy, or anyone as a matter of fact and as much as I'd thought about it on the plane...it all seemed for the better. He wasn't the kind of guy I could've had my regular thing with and I was too young to be serious.

"It was a good show", he told me. I could feel his eyes on me and I didn't flinch. I didn't regret it but his words made me feel guilty. My head was on the headrest of the sofa I sat on and my eyes were closed. My subconscious could feel his curious gaze on me.

"Look away Namjoon", I said and I could feel his gaze was still on me.

"Why didn't you call me when you got back?", he asked me and I looked at him.

"I didn't because our cultures differ, everything is poles apart--what's the point of discussing it now?", I asked him, slightly annoyed. He and I separately needed to focus on our careers and he knew it too damn well.

"Okay", he turned around again as his monitor showed a circle indicating that the programme he'd launched was loading. "It does makes me feel better that my better position in life doesn't changes your opinion on me. Quiet comforting", he said, with a hint of sarcasm in his voice but I chose to ignore it. The last thing I'd be doing is fueling this feeling in him by discussing this useless thing which wouldn't make any difference whatsoever.

"Is this the reason you wanted me to do this project with you?", I asked him and he swiftly turned his chair around.

"No, I don't take all this for granted. I love the stuff you do. I'm pretty updated thanks to how active you're on your social media", he smiled and I couldn't shook the thought of seeing my psychotic episodes on my Instagram, Twitter...everywhere. I'm pretty weird out there.

"I love it, the stories", he flased his dimple smile before turning his chair around again and I felt his warmth, like he meant what he said.

For a second I was taken aback with how tall he was from me and how good he looked, he'd always looked good but he was more mature now and much more reserved. "I'll be calling you often because I won't send it for pre-production without your say on the concept", I told him.

"I'll look forward to a lot of calls", he said. "I'm sorry this is taking a while", he added quickly and for some reason I couldn't look away from him, whose back was visible to me.

"No, take your time", I said, crossing my arms against my chest. I really wished he was a regular guy just making music but then I didn't. I wouldn't want someone to wish that for me. He'd earned all of it and I knew it.

"Look away ___", he said slowly. I could feel his grin through his words and I looked away shaking my head right and left softly. "It's, yeah it's playing", he turned around as the music filled in the empty atmosphere.

It was a slow song with a really fast rap. It was how Namjoon was, he contradicted himself too much. I instantly knew it was his writing from the way the words went and the wordplay came into role. I couldn't help but analyze the song because I was supposed to shoot and sketch a music video for it and at times like this I didn't really get to enjoy the art for the art and I hated it.

"How was it?", he asked me, his eyes fixated on me as the music faded. I wanted it to last.

"The only problem with it is that it ends", I flashed a smlie at him and he shook his head throwing it back.

"That's too corny even for you", Namjoon rolled his eyes but I was being serious. "You know I appreciate heavy critics", he said.

"I didn't find anything to criticize, the writing is great, the composition fits and it has a catchy vibe to it. I think I would listen a song like that on a drive or something? In your case a bicycle but yeah! It's a good song", I summarized my opinion. "Do you like want a trendy video?", I asked him.

"Anything that you want to do with it", he said and I gently nodded. Since it was given to me, I couldn't stop thinking about what to do with it.

"Can you stop thinking about it while you're with me ___?", he chuckled and I looked at him taken aback for a second and then nodded with a soft smile pasted on my lips.

"Your fashion sense has improved", I remarked.

"You look casual", he teased me.

"I, I've no fashion sense. I just wear whatever is there", I told him.

"I don't think so, your Instagram says different", he said.

"It's for the show Namjoon", I said.

"You're really not the type to do that, please don't deceive me", he beamed before he turned his chair around again to minimize the current tabs on the computer.

"You're the last person I'd be deceiving--", my words were cut from an incoming call from one of the producers of one of the shows I was working on. "I need to take this", I told him and answered the call while he just gave me a gentle nod in response.

The producer had informed me about the issues related to casting and the final draft of the script and I knew I had to go.

"Guess I'll see you later, bye", Namjoon said warmly as he smiled at me. The thing was he just knew and that always stuck somewhere.

"Bye", I left.

________________

"I, for one, disagree. C'mon how do you even call it an end?", I threw my hands in the air as we discussed it for the millionth time. I liked Su-ho but his thoughts on GOT made me want to kill him. He is the only person I knew who was satisfied with how it ended.

"I think it was okay, c'mon, you have to consider that the novels didn't end and as compared to that I think it was pretty good", Su-ho claimed while he sat on the bean bag in front of me, pushing it comfortably.

"Don't even start with the novels--", my words were interrupted with the sound of the doorbell, "--they didn't even do a good job interpreting it and I am offended by that. Look there novels", I pointed at my bookshelf, showing him my GOT collection which he knew as I opened the door and my head bumped against Namjoon's chest as he took a step in.

He chuckled as he held the back of my head with one hand and pressed my forehead with the other and rubbed it gently to ease the pain.

"What's uh, what's that? Is it iron", I mocked, pointing at his chest while he let me go from his grip and took his shoes off.

"It can be", he said. "But why were you jumping around so enthusiastically?", he asked me as he seated on the couch in front of Su-ho, as he greeted him and Su-ho greeted him back.

"Game of Thrones heavy discussions", I sighed. "This is Su-ho who's illustrating the storyboard", I told Namjoon.

Su-ho was starstruck and it seemed like it'd take him a good minute to recover and Namjoon was obviously used to it. I didn't call him at the office because a lot of people would want to see him then and it could be exhausting plus he'd a time limit on his hands.

"You know him, ___?", Su-ho widened his eyes at me and I nodded, suppressing my laughter seeing his chaotic ass behave like this.

"A little", I said and I could feel Namjoon's gaze on me. "Maybe a lot", I rephrased. I could see by the way Su-ho looked at me that he needed answers. "Coffee?", I asked Namjoon.

"Oh yeah", he replied and I stood up. "I've thought of two concepts, Su-ho please brief him on it and if you want anything differently Namjoon, you can tell him", I told him as I marched towards the kitchen.

Should I use the regular coffee mugs or should I use the better ones? I mean it doesn't matter anyway but still, it kind of does? I don't know. It just comes to me, the over thinking.

Ah.

I could hear him and Su-ho talking about the concepts faintly and I was low-key proud because I did work hard on them. I opened the cabinet to take out the better coffee mugs.

This is what happens when you stop drinking milk and stop growing up. I rested my hands on the kitchen pavement thinking about how many shoes with heels I'd because of my height.

I wasn't very short but I wasn't my desired height too. It was sad. I was the right person to sell the tonics concerning height because my insecurity would make me buy it. I exhaled heavily and turned around to find Namjoon behind me.

"Let me", my hips pressed against the marble pavement while his body gently pressed against my front, I could spot the mole on his neck while he calmly took the box of mugs out. "Okay?", he whispered softly and I looked on without responding.

"Thanks", I told him, hoping he'd get away from me because this had me feeling some type of way. I won't admit what type of way. That makes it worse.

"Anytime", he clicked his lips, taking a few steps back as I stirred the coffee and poured it in three cups. Should've used regular ones.

"I like the quotes on that wall", he said as I handed him his cup, taking the other two. A wall of my house was covered in post-it notes and other stuff. Some print outs of Van Gogh and Frida's works alongside other things.

"Yeah that? Thanks", I said, as I gave the cup to Su-ho. "Did you decide on something?", I asked, as I sat down and Namjoon just beside me.

"Yeah, the first one. It was kind of okay, he made some alterations so I would send it to you by...maximum tomorrow", Su-ho told me. "But why did you call him here for just this?", he asked me.

"You seem so concerned about his whereabouts", I glared Su-ho . "I told him I could just email him but he insisted on doing it in person", I looked at Namjoon who took a long sip from his coffee.

"Yeah I did, don't worry I was absolutely free", Namjoon smiled at Su-ho and I could see Su-ho fanboy-ing.

"You're so in line today", I pressed my words.

"Shut up", Su-ho eyed me. I wrapped my hands around the coffee mug feeling its warmth.

After I talked to Namjoon for a while about the shoot and he explained to me about their company procedure and how they usually did things. I didn't like doing music videos or commercials, there's a lot of time you're bound by what the music video demands and you've to stick with that so that was that. I usually preferred either cinema like movies or dramas, I hadn't done much but I had done a few and travel shows were my preference.

"I'll see you next time then", Su-ho politely remarked looking at Namjoon and he smiled and gently bowed his head. I walked with him up-to the door. "I didn't, what the hell, you could've given me a heads up?", Su-ho whispered slowly to me as I leaned against the door.

"I didn't knew you were a fan", I said and he playfully hit me on my arm.

"I still can't believe it, you've to answer my hot questions next time", he said and I nodded.

"Okay okay", I closed the door shut behind me, taking a seat on the far side of the sofa me and Namjoon were seated on. He was scanning my bookshelf and I was looking at him.

"Literally 70% of it is fiction", he said. I read a lot of fiction and he read a lot of nonfiction.

"You should read fiction", I said and he looked at me slightly pissed.

"I do read fiction just not thar much", he pointed at my bookshelf. "If you've to recommend one, shoot", he said.

"Recommend, uh, the secrets of happiness", I said randomly and his face sunk in annoyance. "It's not a book talking about literal secrets of happiness, it has a story", I told him.

"Ah okay...I will try reading that. Let me take your copy", he said.

"No", I said back in a split second.

"I won't lose it, c'mon, ___", he said. I couldn't believe his testimony on not losing it.

"Fine, but it's annotated. You'll owe me big time if you lose it", I said and he nodded vigorously.

"Your place is great", he said looking around the house and I couldn't see why, I mean yeah maybe but not that I find it great if I think from his point of view.

"I'm barely here anyway. I pay rent for no reason", I kept the empty mug in my hand on the glass table in front of us.

"That was your friend though, Su-ho?", Namjoon asked as he kept his cup, followed by me.

"Oh yeah! I met him for work but then it's been a while since I know him, it's been years actually and he's a friend now", I said thinking about Su-ho. I don't know why I bothered explaining. It's been a good five years since Namjoon and I hadn't been in touch and there was a little catching up to do.

"You've always had a lot of friends, don't you", he sighed as he sat cross legged on the sofa facing me. I do have plenty friends honestly.

"Kind of", I shrugged. His gaze on me made me sit back in a more cautious way as I fixed my posture. "Namjoon...", I called out his name when the doorbell rung and I was irritated. "Give me a second", I stood up and walked up-to the main door.

It was my neighbor who's mother had left their house keys with me and he was here to take it back. He thanked me for keeping it and walked up to his own flat which was in front of mine.

I closed the door shut and Namjoon was standing by the balcony seeing a cactus I had grown since I couldn't grow any other plant because I was never home to take care of them in case.

"It's cute", he said as he picked the potted plant and stared at it for a little while and I stood behind him and watched him see it.

"You know your pupils dilate when you see plants", I said and he smiled to himself. He kept the cactus back in its resting place and stared at me. "What?", I asked him.

"You were going to say something", he said, his voice sounded deeper then usual for a second and I licked my bottom lip in haste.

"Oh that, you know the alterations you made? I will directly mail it to the staff and maybe cc you because it won't need a second check anyway. I've to get this done a little early since I've--", he turned towards me and I took a step back but there was barely any space and my back was pressed against the wall, "--what is it?", I asked but it came out as a whisper.

"Here", he dragged his index finger across my bottom lip and there was something on my lip. I didn't really see what was on there because of his presence so close to me. My heartbeat had fastened and I could feel it. Something I didn't want to feel.

"Thanks, I guess", I said slowly and he flashed his dimple smile at me and in that moment he seemed the opposite of the dominant he was a few seconds ago.

"Do you know you look really good?", he said, as his fingers ran across my ear touching the piercings one by one. I regretted having three all of a sudden. "And I didn't intended to do this but ___ I uh", he bent over a little, his lips a few inches away from my ear and his breath was falling on my neck.

"Namjoon", I said, trying to not look at him. I knew damn well I couldn't be able to control myself.

"Hmm", his voice was so small and I could feel goosebumps all over my neck. His gaze on me was strong and I had jitters in my stomach.

"I, uh--let's not okay", I put my hands on his shoulder as he pulled me more closer with a jolt and I gasped.

"Do you really not want to?", he asked me. It was a while since I was in this close proximity of someone like this but my subconscious kept telling me not to. "I don't understand what you find so undesirable about me", he took a few steps back and looked away.

What?

"Do you think I find you undesirable?", I asked him, pressing my lips suppressing my smile. I couldn't get how could he change roles in a span of few seconds.

"Yeah, it's pretty evident really", he sighed, looking at the the far side of the sky at the horizon and I saw him sulking.

"It's not that, are you fucking dumb? It's just you know you shouldn't start things you can't take care of", I said. For some reason I've always felt a little hesitant with him. "But you're desirable enough", I added.

"Sudden validation from you, ah", he clicked his lips in mockery and I felt bad. The last thing I wanted was to look like I was playing hard to get. I didn't feel competent enough in my heart. "Let me kiss you", he said, taking a few steps closer breaking the chain of my thoughts and I hated being so much in control and feeling a little out of place.

I was back to where I was a few seconds ago, me cornered and he put his lips on mine and my body automatically responded. He took over me in a second. My hands rested on his back and clutched the fabric. His hands travelled below my hips as he pulled me upwards and my legs wrapped around his waist. He didn't stop kissing me for one second and I didn't want him to, as he pressed his mouth harder on mine and I bit back a moan. I could feel the heat in my body and every vein seemed to electrify. He walked me up-to my bedroom like he knew which suddenly felt foreign to me as he laid me on the bed, breaking the kiss and I was breathless, panting for air.

I didn't had any resort in me to stop. I didn't want him to stop. I couldn't care more about whatever that had me concerned for a while. He watched me look at him and his lips curved in a smirk. "Should I stop?", he teased me taking a seat on the edge of the bed and I looked away from him to the right side, scoffing.

I pushed myself up, my hands at the hem of the lose white t-shirt I'd on and for a second I hesitated at the fact that he must've seen better flesh than mine but I pulled it upwards exposing myself in front of him as his eyes went everywhere. "Do you want to stop?", I asked him, as I crawled over to him. He didn't object as I sat on his lap and took his face in my hands. I looked in his eyes. He looked beautiful. I traced the outline of his skull, his jaw as I pushed his hair locks that were on his forehead behind. "Do you want to stop Namjoon?", I asked him again as he held me tight, giving me my answer.

He tugged at my neck with his mouth leaving a trail of gentle kisses down and I could feel my nipples startlingly prominent beneath the black lightweight bra I had on. I clutched his hair as he bit my neck suddenly and I gasped.

He pushed me on to him, nearer but there was barely any space for me to come close and I could feel him all over. He messily kissed me before groping my bottom and I-I cut a breath in. He would take turns and be gentler a second and rough the another. "Namjoon", I called out gasping which fueled him even more. He looked at me and smiled proudly at how he had me without doing much.

He flicked the straps of my bra shoving it down exposing my breasts and I could feel my nipples harden to the point it was painful. I wanted him. I wanted him to touch me, more. The way my body responded to his touch was almost funny, how quick, how wet.

I patiently unbuttoned his shirt and stripped it off of him while he looked at me with a gaze I couldn't quite make anything of, he just looked at me while he let me work on him. My hands touched his chest and my eyes examined his torso, his skin was warm and his gaze on me gave me confidence like he wanted me back as much I wanted him.

I was forgetting my own desperation for his touch as my hand traveled behind his back, trailing down to his spine and he looked at me as he cut a sharp breath in and I felt good seeing him giving in to me. His arms surrounded mine unclasping my bra in a second and he threw it off on the floor.

I half expected him to grab me and grope my breast but he swept me in his arms as his vaguely pink mouth pressed against mine and instead of hastily grabbing me, his mouth simply rested against mine and it was worse, much more intoxicating. I, on instinct coiled my arms against his neck.

As my tongue demanded entrance and he smiled before letting me, and in a second, roles were reversed, the romantic was gone. He took control and pressed his mouth harder on me with his thumb and finger pressing my nipple and my nails dug deeper in his neck. "Joon...", I on instinct called out, as I gasped for breath but he didn't let me.

He was hard against me and I grinded next to him which seemed to please him while he left my mouth, burning with a wanting for more while my sex clenched as he took control of my body putting his arms around my back and they were free to go anywhere. I wouldn't dare stop him.

A second later, he laid me on the bed and hovered over me before taking my shorts off in a whirl and pushed my underwear off me that it didn't seem reusable. I anticipated his actions but he pushed a thumb into my bottom without no warning and I clutched the sheets, a yell escaping my mouth. My fingers curled meanwhile his other arm grabbed my breast cupping it and a second later his forefinger and middle finger slipped inside of me and my grip on the sheets tightened.

"Shh", he hissed in my ear and I hadn't realized a moan had escaped my mouth. My whole body rocked in less then a minute and I couldn't control my voice, I gasped for breath and I moaned even louder then before. "I didn't take you for a screamer ___", Namjoon seemed amused while embarrassment washed over me as I laid exposed in front of him.

"Let me go down on you", I told him and he looked taken aback as I pushed myself up.

"Do you really want to?", he asked and I shifted closer to him, placing a gentle kiss on his lips.

"I would love to", I told him. "Do you want me to?", I asked him.

"Yeah, I mean yeah", he said when his phone rang echoing in the room and his face flushed into irritation as he looked at me and I nodded gesturing him to take it. He took it out of his pocket and answered it. With every word he spoke, his irritation grew. He hung up the phone call. "Where's the wardrobe?", he asked me and my eyes pointed behind him.

Namjoon opened my wardrobe and took out a very lose t-shirt of his choice from my stack of comfortable clothes. He held my arms and slipped the t-shirt on me, pulling me close. He stroked my face and he smiled in my face which forced me to smile as well.

"Am I suppose to expect something from you or should I forget this?", I asked him as his fingers tucked the few strands of my hair behind my ear.

"You're supposed to expect everything, don't dare forget it", he whispered in my ear, nibbling on it and I couldn't help but giggle. "I want to talk to you but I've to go now and I hate it", he smiled at me.

"Okay, go", I told him and he chuckled before letting me off him and he wore his shirt back on.

After seeing him off and taking a shower, I laid back on the couch in the living room thinking about everything that had happened. I didn't regret it, I wasn't thinking much about it anyway.

The guys I'd sex with or made out with, I disliked them because of their narcissism. I appreciated my ability to find guys that were a-grade assholes. I've always had this feeling that I am lacking in some sense with other people. I look normal, like I should but I get this insecurity when taking my clothes off.

I didn't knew what Namjoon thought about it and asking him would be weird. No one who knows me like him would think I am this insecure or anxious about this stuff but then a major part of it has to do with my aura, I guess?

________________

I took a bite of the sandwich that I held in my hand as I walked around the second set just nearby to the first one. I stood afar, taking a good look, even though the storyboard fits the sights I still need to frame out a rough sketch work in my head.

I took another bite staring at the beach and the path to it and then back to the set that we'd build up by man power. It was pretty accurate in my eyes but I wanted to hear from my assistant director.

I took the walkie talkie out from the pocket of my denim and pressed the centre button, "Jae-chan, where are you?"

In a second he reverted, "Ah sunbae I am near the gripper".

"Come to the road that leads to the beach", I said, before shoving the walkie talkie down in my pocket.

The sea met the sky at the far point of the horizon and how the world is full of these illusions which are not real we know but we still believe. After all there's beauty in things that you don't get. Vastness maybe?

Sea and sky — the two melancholic blues.

"Sunbae?", Jae Chan broke the chain of my thoughts and I glanced at him before looking at the sea. His breath was heavy, I could tell he ran here.

"You could have walked, Chan-ah", I said, smiling. He was really young and passionate about filmmaking but also a little silly. He's cute.

"Ah it's okay. Did you need something?", he asked politely and I shook my head. I liked the input of many people on the same thing, it showed the number of opinions that could centre around one thing that you make in a different context which is then perceived in another.

"Do you think this is accurate in terms of the story board?", I asked him and he seemed lost in thought.

"I would say slightly better because the storyboard is still animation and this is real so I would say better. I'm pretty sure it'll be good sunbae", he told me and I could feel a smile flush on my lips. "You are nervous, aren't you?", he asked me.

"Yeah", I wrinkled my nose, turning around to walk off. I patted Jae Chan's back and he started walking with me.

"You don't have to be, and oh, he's here", he said assuring me and I knew who he meant by he.

My mind automatically went to the day in my apartment. Namjoon had messaged me after but he got busier with his work and I am not a text-er plus I'd a lot of things to do before I left Korea. It was, I didn't knew anything and I didn't want to think about it. I hoped he'd pretend nothing happened, please. But I knew he won't.

I sighed and as I entered the main set, around the vanity and food truck, the manager and Namjoon's staff members greeted me. After that, I mean impractically I wanted earth to open and swallow me. Living is hard anyway.

I'd a flight on the weekend, I'd to pack and I'd to get new boots but I'm just dumb because I'm trying to think of other things. I need a new nail paint, do I? I looked at my nails which were painted black. Maybe grey?

"Sunbae?", Jae Chan shook me and I looked at him. He gestured me to look up front and Namjoon was right there looking like Namjoon.

"Hi", I awkwardly waved at him.

"Hi", he flashed his dimple smile at me. His dimple smile hits me.

"You can get the makeup and hair done, I've a few things to recheck", I excused myself. This is awkward. This is so awkward. I hate it.

Δ

Even though I had that awkwardness lingering around but we were nearing to the end of the shoot which went really good because everyone worked so hard. It was mostly one-takes and the lighting supported the whole setting making it so easier for us to finish.

Moreover, it was a while since I had done a music video so it felt good being back on a set like this. Namjoon looked really good with the styling and although I knew the outfits pre-shoot, he still looked better then I'd imagined him to look which enhanced the whole vibe of the music video. He owned earthly tones.

That's why casting and styling is so important. Very much. Makes a gigantic difference.

"What's wrong with you?", I didn't notice he was standing next to me with a small fan in his hands while we prepped for the last shot.

"What's wrong with me?", I asked him, as I adjusted the frame in the main camera. I didn't want this conversation especially right now, especially here.

"I mean...you knowww?", I could feel his stare while I shifted the camera, something is wrong with this.

"I don't know", I said, without looking at him. I was unintentionally making him mad and nothing else.

"I was really scared that you'd say this and see, I mean, why can't you behave normal when I mention anything about us?", he hissed near me and I looked around. Luckily there was no one in our proximity to hear this conversation.

"I-I, Namjoon", I exclaimed, vaguely pointing at the setting hoping we could do this later and I could explain that I would love us but he needs to understand that I won't even be in Korea as much as he thinks I would be and that's why it won't work out.

"I don't care", he eyed me.

"I do. I care, okay? There's no us to begin with and I know I was stupid enough to ask you what I should expect out of, what would you call it, we made out. That's that", I tried being really slow and I could feel annoyance in his sight.

"Made out! Okay, okay fine. I can't believe I deal with you. You're the one who doesn't text or call or even respond to it and that's bare minimum ___", he pondered and I internally rolled my eyes.

I was leaving on the weekend. I was always leaving. That's it. "I don't have to and I have a life Namjoon. I've been working non stop all this time. I don't expect you to understand", I said, standing up from my seat while I called for the head DOP from the walkie talkie.

"You don't want to be understood ___", Namjoon said, grabbing me from my arm and stopping me. He wasn't wrong. A few eyes snapped and I forced a smile immediately. "I like you, I like you a lot. Deal with it", he walked past me.

Deal with it.

As if.

Very abruptly, the last shot rolled in and it was over. The music video was done in a day. It was originally a two day sketch but we had to narrow it down to one day because of Namjoon's schedule and it was worrisome because it did seem impossible but things went smoothly and it was successfully over.

I told Jae Chan to wrap the filming site, though most of it was done while I was present. I picked my bag from a table to leave, kept right ahead from the vanity. Namjoon had left, I guess. I wasn't sure because after the last shot he was angry. He had his jaw clenched all that time, he barely managed to keep it out on the music video.

He was like this, his anger was pretty evident and that hadn't changed.

I like you. I like you a lot.

I couldn't wrap my head around that thought. Did he like me all this time? It sounded pretty crazy to me. I had never thought about anything with Namjoon. He was a friend I could like but I didn't, I had never expected anything out of my acquaintance with him anyway.

"You ate?", his deep voice made me look at him who stood at the steps of the vanity. He hadn't left yet.

"No", I said. He had changed into his normal clothes, the makeup was gone but he still looked great. His natural complexion was shining as the set lights fell onto his face. It made me surer how Namjoon needed someone who could be there rather then somebody who's never there.

"Come eat something", he said calmly. He looked much composed then before.

"I am not hungry", I stated just when he darted towards me. He held me by my forearm, dragging me into the vanity which was empty except for us. A few dishes were laid out on the table in front of the small couch.

"Eat and leave", he said, taking a seat on one of the chairs in front of the mirrors fidgeting with his phone while I quietly sat on the couch. I just wanted it to be over but I'd no appetite so I kept staring at the couple of Italian dishes which were pasta, carbonara I guess, rissoto and also jjangmyeong. "Just eat anything ___", he said, without bothering to look at me.

"I don't really have an appetite", I said, throwing my head back and looking at the ceiling of the vanity.

"What you've is a habit of skipping meals", he eyed me.

I looked at him. "Do you remember everything? Like literally everything?", I asked him as curiosity brimmed in my eyes.

"You don't?", he asked me back. "Well, for me, yeah I do. I did remember every thing but I should probably forget now. I didn't really asked to work with you because I wanted something but I can't say I didn't hope", he locked his phone and kept it on the space in front him. "I mean, we did had something. We did have something a few days ago. You can't exactly call me a friend and I've never seen you as one. The moment you walked in trying to fix the mess on the set since then till now I can't say I didn't hope you'd look at me the same way", he said, bringing all the memories back alive, but it was true, I never looked at him the way he'd wanted me to, hell, I couldn't believe it one bit. "It's true", he said, as if he just read my mind.

It was, it didn't made sense to me. How could he? Why would he? I uh, I think shit's wrong with me because even now I can't seem to focus on someone who confessed their feelings and that someone being Namjoon from all people.

I remember when I was one of the assistant directors under the director for one of the most low-key and low budget project. They didn't had many resources and our firm wasn't doing well either. We always had to come up with hacks, unknown locations for shooting...it was always so hard. We didn't had any respect in the industry.

It was two companies in one boat at the end of bankruptcy and we were so young and such good friends. I knew the rest of the members too but I kind of had a certain vibe with Namjoon. He could get me without having to speak.

I locked at him, his face was fixated on me and I could like him, in fact I did love him not romantically, I just did. I had a lot of love for him. He was caring for the people around him and I loved talking to him. He never once made anyone feel like he was a celebrity back then and a global celebrity now well yeah. He did deserve someone who could be here for him.

He stood up and walked towards me and my eyes followed him. He took a seat next to me and I could see he picked a bowl up but I didn't see which one because I couldn't stop looking at him. Namjoon took a significant amount and extended it to me and I looked at the noodles for a second and then at him. He just nodded and I ate it.

It was good.

"Thanks", I said, wiping the corners of my mouth with my fingers.

"Do you want me to feed you all the way or can you eat your own?", he asked me.

"I will eat", I told him and he gave me the bowl so I could eat on my own. "You ate?", I asked him and he instantly nodded.

"You're going somewhere, aren't you?", he asked me and I felt as if I've just been struck with something.

"Hmm", I said, my mouth almost filled. "And, I...I want to tell you something like adults and clear it. Namjoon you know my work and I am always not here, never. It's useless. Trust me on this, it's not like that but you know you'll need someone beside you and I can't be the one", I told him, calmly, before gulping water down.

"I know that but I'm okay with it. In fact, we would go hand in hand better because I can't take you out on exotic dates as well. This is what you get", he vaguely gestured at the vanity and I chuckled and he warmly smiled at me.

After a second, I spoke much seriously then before, "It will be hard and you know that. It'll be frustrating. You could hate me".

"If you've tired it with someone before, I am not exactly happy knowing this, but you shouldn't compare me with some random dude with a peculiar taste in leather clothing", he rolled his eyes, shifting his back comfortably.

"Hey! Don't be mean just because you see stuff on my Instagram", I scoffed and he maintained his long face.

"No really, what do you take me for? You think you won't have time for me? I won't have time for you", he went on.

"Namjoon", I dragged his name. His tendency to be sarcastic at odd moments is unmatched.

"Don't call my name like that", he stared at my eyes.

"Like what?", I asked him.

"Like you can love me", he said.

"I...you don't have to be like this", I said, keeping the empty bowl on the table.

"Give me a chance then, try it out. I would wait for you I promise", Namjoon took my hand in his and covered it with his warmth.

"Will I be able to...wait?", I looked away from him, thinking about it so hard.

"___ don't think too much. I promise, we'll be fine", he said, his hands travelling to my waist and before he could grab it. I screeched closer to him. I cupped his face and attached my lips to his, while his hands held on my body.

________________

My relationship with Namjoon was better then I imagined it. I tried my best to be there for him and he was surprisingly almost there for me but it wasn't exactly easy.

It was months and months of hardships and Namjoon was more needy then I thought him to be, he needed a lot of assurance. I don't understand the notion that he holds of everyone wanting me so he needs to be extra careful. I still don't get that his insecure ass doesn't trusts his own members, he won't let me meet them at all.

He was really different. He shifted from dominant to romantic in one second. I loved that. I kind of missed it so much.

He held my hand I could feel it by the way his skin felt against mine, he whirled me around and in a second his hand rested on my waist as he urged me to walk next to him. He was in a perfect disguise and I looked at him. I could tell he was smiling beneath his black mask.

"See, this is why I don't trust other guys! How could you let someone do this to you in the midst of the road in a foreign country?", he asked me.

"No stranger would confidently do this to anyone in a foreign country", I playfully hit him on his leg and he stopped, pretending to be gravely hurt. "I can't believe you", I looked at him as I went with his act. I supported him in standing completely. In a second, he intertwined his fingers with mine.

"I missed you", he softly whispered in my ear.

"I missed you too", I whispered back, softly. I pulled him in an empty alley and pulled his mask down. "I need you to do something", I told him, nibbling on his ear and I could feel my skin feel the heat that it yearned for since a couple of months before him going on tour.

"Right now?", he asked surprised.

"Yeah, right now", I said and I could feel him harden against my pelvis.

"You are...so, not right now. Let's go to your hotel room. I'm still famous", he pulled me closer and I chuckled. He turned me around, pulling his mask down, he kissed me hard. His mouth pressed against mine. I held him tightly and he gasped. "I love you", he softly said before pulling his mask up.

"I, you", I held his hand again.

[knockknockchicagopd]

❛ A FUTURE COP ❜

❚❙ REQUEST BY ANON: hi i hope ur having the greatest week on the planet , can i request where reader is younger than hank and she tells him shes pregnant and telling him with some fluff

❚❙ HANK VOIGHT MASTERLIST.

❚❙ WORDS: about 2k.

❚❙ A/N: this writing hasn’t been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I’m sorry about that. If you find a description about body or a word out of place, or something that it makes you feel uncomfortable / unrepresented, let me know by a private message and I will change it delighted.

❚❙ GIF credits: to my amazing @sonsofeorl.

❚❙ Tag list: @melblacc @rebelwrites @skyofficialxx @sesamepancakes @scarletsoldierrr @mondefantastique @that-chick212 @enbyamaro @inlovewith3 @ocetevasgirl @sophie-writes @destynelseclipsa @jadakiss13. If you want to be added to my tag list, send me a message.

You have lost the count of how many minutes you've been sitting in the locker room, in silence. Your head is loud enough right now. Hank has left the police station already, and you're waiting the time accorded before doing the same and driving your way to his house. Almost one year and you keep staying there ten minutes more than him, to not make anyone suspect about your relationship. But you aren't sure if you're ready to go.

The fear of losing Hank for what you have to tell him is consuming you, like a big fire reducing your bones to ashes. It's painful, for describing it somehow. The pressure within your chest is going to kill you, suddenly breaking into an anguish crying, resting your back against the wall and curling your legs to your torso. The two of you haven't talked about starting a family. The loss of Justin still being an open wound, bleeding a little bit every day. How are you supposed to tell him that you're pregnant?

“(Y/N)?”

Antonio's voice races your heart, peeking his head out through the lockers. He sounds worried. He looks worried, walking slowly towards you without profering any sharp move. Kneeling next to you, not sure about what he can do, the detective holds your hand to caress the back of them with his thumb; thinking that this gesture can help you to relax. But the sob continues stuck in your throat and the tears roam your cheek like a torrential and furious racing river.

Sitting down by your side, Antonio places an arm over your shoulders, urging you to rest your head on his. He doesn't know what to say. And even if he wanted to say something, his vocal cords fail when your phone dings with a notification and he sees the screen illuminating over the floor. Hank. “Voight?” He thinks raising up an eyebrow, in a mix of curiosity and confusion.

“Where are you? Something jumped off?”

Grabbing your phone and blocking it to keep it inside your pocket, you turn at the man. Your lips are trembling. You're not sure if you can talk, but you need to rip it off from your chest. You don't want to lose Hank, at this point, not even your work matters.

“Ant—Antonio… I am… pregnant”.

Shaking his head slightly, his eyes widened surprised. His forefinger points at the floor for a moment, to the position of your phone a second ago, asking without words if Hank is the father. You nod pressing your lips. He's in shock. You can see in his eyes, trying to find the correct sentence to say. Congratulations? Are you kidding me? Voight, seriously?

“We… started to date… a year and a half ago and… hm… made it official almost a ye—year ago”.

“Who knows it?”

“Only you. No one else. And I'm terrified, be—because… I was there when he lost Justin and… shit, we've always taken all the care, but… this happened”. Biting your bottom lip, as the tears keep filling up your eyes, you try to not cry anymore. “I don't know… how to tell him. I don't know if he wants this. I don't want to lose him, Antonio”.

“Hey, listen now. You're not gonna lose him, okay?” Turning his body at you and adopting your same position, he hits your shoulder briefly with his fist. “I've an idea. Write him and tell him that you're on your way and meet me in the hall”.

Nodding, he shows you a soft smile before standing up to leave the locker room. Cleaning your cheeks with the back of your hands, you do exactly what he has told you. After writing to your boyfriend and picking up your things, you walk out of the place to wait downstairs. Not a minute after, Antonio comes from behind the main desk saying his goodbye to Platt, before following you to the outside.

Offering you the bag he's carrying in his right hand, keeping the other in a pocket, you take it with curiosity.

“This department, his career, is his life. This is a good way to tell him”.

Grabbing the piece of clothing inside it, you read the emblem of Chicago P.D. before noticing the small size of the shirt.

“We usually give these shirts to the kids who come to see the station”.

Yes. That's the better idea. Your lips curve up in a tender grin of gratitude. You can't help but hug him, without caring who can be watching you.

“C'mon, go to his house and give it to him”.

“Thank you, Antonio… I don't… I don't know what to say”.

“You don't have to. Tell me tomorrow how it has goin'”.

In silence, you nod after placing a kiss on his cheek, keeping back the grey t-shirt inside the bag to go find your car in the private parking.

As always, the road is somewhat empty, reaching Hank's neighborhood in a sight. You can see the lights turned on inside, through the windows, and a free place to park your SUV behind his. Taking your time to leave your car there, you step out having a deep breath trying to calm yourself and your nerves. In your head dance a lot of possible ways about how he will react, and every one of them scares you like never.

Putting your eyes on the bag, you find the needed encouragement to come into his house. Leaving your backpack at the entrance, you lead your steps to the back garden, finding Hank sitting on a wooden chair, leaning forward and shaking his knees nervously. You haven't come this ‘late’ before. But as soon as you sit by his side, placing the bag over the dinner table, he feels less agitated.

Resting his back against his chair, tangling his hands over his abdomen, he can't help but feel curiosity about the content of it and the worrying installed on your face.

“What kind of hell are you into, hm?”

Rubbing the line of his jaw with his thumb, he intertwines his hands again waiting for a response. Maybe we need to talk aren't the words you want to choose, but they're the ones that escape from your throat. Watching how his face hardens, you gulp before licking your bottom lip.

“I don't know how it happened. It's not like… I planned it”.

“Don't beat around the bush and be clear with me”. Hank gesticulates with his forefinger, as he always does when he's losing his nerves. “That's why you have been acting distant, right? If you don't want to continue, just tell me”.

He hisses the last three words, hiding the misery in his tone of voice, leaning forward to you. And that really hurts you, to think that he believes you don't love him anymore. That he may think that his life is not compatible with yours. But that's bullshit. You would make them both fit at any cost, if you would have to.

“What? No, no, no! I'm not going to leave you, Hank. I don't want to”.

“Then, what is this about?”

You can't help but close your eyes and take a deep, deep, deep breath until you feel your lungs about to explode. Expelling the air through your nostrils, you decide to give him the bag instead of continuing screwing up the situation by using the wrong words. Frowning, he slides his hand inside it to take off the shirt of small size. Putting it between his fingers and in front of his hands, Hank raises an eyebrow without understanding what that shirt means.

“You stole it?”

“Technically… It wasn't me, but… Antonio”.

“Antonio stole a shirt and gave it to you, because he doesn't know how to return it?”

Moving your lips in silence, trying to say something, you can't believe he's really this fucking dumb. Shrugging he keeps it back inside the bag, pressing his lips.

“I will do it tomo—”.

“To be a detective, you're too stupid, Henry”. The laugh fills up the garden for a moment, starting to feel less scared than five minutes ago. “Hold the shirt again and put that brain of yours to work”.

He grunts tired of your games, doing what you just told him. Placing it stretched over the table, your boyfriend seems thoughtful rubbing his chin. Looking at you sideways, he shakes his head not getting what you want to tell him, turning towards you clapping his hands.

“I hate riddles. Spit it of a damn time, sweetheart”.

“I'm pregnant”.

Hank doesn't move a single inch of his body, as if he hadn't listened to you. His brown eyes are glued on yours. He doesn't even blink, looking at you as if he's studying your face to make sure himself that it's not a macabre joke. That you aren't kidding. That you're telling him the truth. When he kisses his lips, still remaining silence, you feel at the edge.

“Listen, I was scared of telling you. Not only because it means that people should know we are together, but because I don't know how you feel about it. But I swear for my badge, if you don't say anything in ten seconds, I'm gonna punch you in the face. And believe me, I have had a horrible day, Hank. Got too much rage accumulated in my hands”.

“I don't know what to say”. He whispers while you finish your threat.

Barely breathing, you nod, licking your incisors, putting your gaze away somewhere in the garden. It wasn't the response you wanted to hear, but it was the one you were waiting for. Being sure that he's going to end your relationship, but at least taking care of your baby, the tears fill up your eyes, reddening them again.

Cleaning a furtive one running down your left cheek, you get up from your seat about to leave the porch to come into the house, grab your things and go to your apartment. The only thing you were afraid of since you met him is now destroying you slowly. But Hank doesn't let you pass him away, gently gripping your forearm to make you take a step back and sit on his lap.

“I'm sorry…” You sob covering your face with both hands, not being able to look at him.

“Why?”

“I just… I don't wanna lose you. I've never felt happier in my… fucking life, before meeting you. I'm my best version since we're together. I lo—I love you with all my heart, I swear it…”

“Is this because of Justin?”

Your cry suddenly stops, using the sleeves of your jacket to clean your face, raising it towards him. It's been a long time since you talked about his son for the last time, keeping the mourning for himself.

“I saw you, Hank. You were devastated… Your wound is still bleeding and it's okay. It's normal, I understand it. I will never tell you to not cry for him. I didn't want you to… feel like I'm trying to cover this hole in your heart, just because the only thing I want is you to be happy. I didn't wa—”.

“Justin died, that's a fact. I miss him every day of my life. I should have been a better father for him. Maybe he would be alive now, maybe that night wouldn't have ever happened. But that doesn't mean I don't want this”. He points at the grey t-shirt, giving you some hope. “There's no one who cares more about me than you do. I've imagined my life with you thousands of times. How it would be to have a family together. Do the right thing, because it's never too late to change. And as you said so, you made me a better man too. I want it, (Y/N). I want this life with you. I want this kid. And I want you”.

You pout at him, feeling much better knowing that everything is clear. Placing a hand on the back of your neck, he pushes you closer to catch your lips with his to transmit you all the happiness and the tenderness he has inside his soul, after giving him this second chance in life.

“We will talk with Crowley and Platt tomorrow, okay with that?” You nod in response. “So… Antonio knows, uh?”

“Yeah, he… found me crying in the locker room and saw your message on my phone. It was his idea”.

“He had a good one”. Hank assures while chuckling, urging to rest your head against his chest. “I will give him a biscuit tomorrow, you know, for being a smart dog”.

“He wasn't in Narcotics for anything…”

[captainkippen]

SEND ME FIC PROMPTS

Cyrus and TJ's relationship can be described as ‘almost-something-not-quite-there-yet” and has been at that stage for a rather frustrating six months. He's not sure why it's taking them so long to do about it, but Cyrus is certain that TJ must have also acknowledged the tension between them because there have been a few near misses so far where he's thought 'this is iT, he's going to tell me how it feels’ only for TJ to break off what he was saying and turn it into some unrelated ramble. Thanks to this, it's becoming more and more common for him to feel like he's about to tear his hair out when the two of them spend time together. He doesn't want to push TJ to do or say anything he's not ready to do or say, but Cyrus figures it's time to take matters into his own hands or they might actually be stuck at this glacial pace of romance for the next fifty years. He doesn't think he can take fifty years of longing looks and heartfelt texts that lead to nothing. He'll go insane.

The opportunity to make a move arises when Bex and Bowie finally settle on the date of their wedding. At first there's a little hesitation, the engagement has been called off and called back on more than once now and they're all starting to wonder if they'll actually ever do it, but when it's only about a month away Cyrus figures they're finally safe from any drama and starts concocting a plan.

“I need to book dance lessons,” he says offhandedly when they're all lazing around Buffy's house one day. He's sprawled dramatically across one of the couches with his feet up on TJ's lap and a bowl of popcorn on his chest. It's a movie day but the horror flick they're watching is so terrible that nobody's been paying attention for the last forty five minutes. “For the wedding. There's going to be waltzing, right? I don't know how to waltz. Andi, do you know where Bowie's getting his?”

Andi eyes him suspiciously. She's well aware that Cyrus knows how to waltz. He had taught her to waltz when they were twelve. His mom had made him have lessons as a kid. Cyrus is fantastic at waltzing, even if he does say so himself. However, TJ doesn't know that. He gives her a look that says 'play along I'm begging you've and she sighs.

“At the dance studio on second street, I think,” she says. He's so blessed to have such good friends. “Bex knows one of the girls that runs it so she's giving him a discount.”

“You don't know how to waltz?” TJ asks curiously, perfectly on cue. “Don't you do dance for your P.E classes?”

Cyrus shrugs. “It's not ballroom.”

The thing is, he's concocted the perfect plan. TJ doesn't know Cyrus knows how to waltz, but Cyrus knows that TJ does. TJ had surprised them all with this knowledge a few weeks ago at a school dance. Jonah wanted to impress a girl he liked, TJ offered to show him how to dance and everyone got their happily ever after. Except Cyrus. TJ had not waltzed with Cyrus. He's still a little bitter about it.

“I could teach you,” he offers. “Save you the money.”

“Really?” Cyrus says, grinning. “Awesome. Yeah, that would be great thanks.”

Cyrus mentally marks phase one of mission ‘get TJ to admit his feelings’ a success.

*

TJ comes over on Saturday. Cyrus’ mom and stepdad have gone out to some barbeque with friends and won't be back until later so he's taking advantage of an empty house as much as he can. He makes sure to run to the store in the morning to grab some of TJ's favourite chips and soda (Baja blast Mountain Dew because what else do you expect from a teenage boy), and does a rush job at tidying up even though TJ has definitely seen the house in a much worse state than it is. He's been over during family events - he knows how wild they get. There's an odd nervous sensation thrumming in Cyrus’ veins. He has no reason to be on edge. It's just TJ. He tells himself this over and over, trying to calm down, but still jumps when he heard the front door opening and TJ yelling a greeting through the house. He's been letting himself in since they were fourteen now. It's a standard.

“I'm down here,” he yells back. They're going to be practicing in the basement so he's moved the ping-pong table out the way and set up the stereo so it's ready to go. TJ's socked feet thud down the stairs and he beams at him when he comes into view. He pulls Cyrus into a sideways hug and quickly releases him, making a beeline for the Mountain Dew. Cyrus rolls his eyes - typical.

“So how do you wanna do this?”

Cyrus shrugs. “You're the teacher.”

“You got music?”

He hands him to remote to the stereo. TJ fiddled with it for a moment before switching it on to a rhythmic rock beat with a grin. He puts it down, shrugs off his hoodie and walks towards Cyrus.

“You ready?” He pulls Cyrus towards him, positioning them both carefully.

“We're really just jumping into it, then?”

“Of course. I'm gonna lead and I'm gonna explain the steps as we go, okay? Try not to step on my feet.”

Cyrus does step on his feet, several times, quite deliberately. Each time it sets them both off in a bout of giggling and they have to pause for a moment. The afternoon continues in much the same vein, Cyrus pretending to be terrible and making TJ laugh and feeling like his whole world is complete everytime he catches TJ smiling softly at him. His heart thumps when their faces get close together and he hopes and prays that his palms aren't too sweaty where they're clasped in TJ's. It feels right, the two of them together like this.

There's a moment, when they're coming to the end of a song and slowing down where Cyrus thinks this might be it. TJ might say something. They're looking into one another's eyes, the world around them faded slightly, and he's holding his breath waiting for him to say anything. Then TJ coughs, ducks his head and pulls away, announcing they should take a break and get some lunch, and Cyrus kind of wants to scream in frustration. This plan is going to take longer than he expected.

*

As it turns out, the plans takes much longer than he expected. TJ gives him three more dance lessons before the wedding and nothing comes of them. It's the most irritated Cyrus has ever been with him, which he realises isn't technically fair because TJ isn't a mind reader and can't possibly know Cyrus is losing his grip on reality as a result of all these pent up emotions between them, but he can't help it.

The evening of the wedding is a beautiful one. It's being held in a large white tent in the park which is lit up with beautiful handmade lamps dotted around artfully, illuminating the flowers and chairs that have been set up for the ceremony. In the dark outside, fireflies flicker in and out of existence. The stars above them are almost unusually bright. It seems like there's a certain amount of magic in the air.

Cyrus may or may not cry during the vows. He and TJ sit together, knees pressed up against one another like always, the edges of their hands touching ever so gently stop them. He thinks he might have heard a sniffle or two from TJ as well, but he doesn't comment. TJ is sensitive about those kinds of things. Bex and Bowie are so obviously in love, they both nearly sob during their vows, and for a moment Cyrus envies them with everything he has. He wants that one day. To love somebody so much it consumes him, but it makes him happier and a better person in the process. He thinks about the boy sat next to him and how it feels like he's pretty close to that already.

In typical Mack fashion, they throw a stellar party for the reception. There's a live swing band and a lot of loud laughter. Champagne flows freely and a disco ball that he suspects was Andi's idea glitters above the makeshift dance floor. Cyrus watches in amusement as the guests get drinker, the dancing gets worse and the jokes get dirtier. Everyone's having such a good time. When the first waltz comes on, he catches TJ's eyes across the room.

It seems like time stops as he walks towards him. TJ meets him in the middle with a wide smile and pulls them both on to the dance floor, taking Cyrus’ hand and placing his own on his waist. Cyrus forgets all about pretending to be terrible but TJ doesn't seem surprised in the slightest.

“I knew you were faking,” he laughs.

“I don't know what you're talking about,” Cyrus says, but he can't hold back his own smile. “... How'd you figure it out?”

He rolls his eyes. “I know you better than anyone, Cy. You're my best friend. You think I don't know you can dance? Your mom's shown me the pictures of your ballroom classes before. I'm not totally stupid.”

Cyrus prevents himself from saying 'that's debatable’ but it's a close call. TJ seems to read his mind and laughs anyway.

“I don't get why you needed to pretend, though,” he says. “You don't need to come up with excuses to hang out with me. You could tell me we're going to go sit in a field in silence for four hours and I'd still come because you'd be there.”

Cyrus sighs. “I know… it's just. I don't know. It's stupid, never mind.”

“No, what is it? Tell me.”

“I think…” he takes a deep breath. “You say you're my best friend, and that's true, but I also think you're more than that. And you have been for a really long time.”

TJ just keeps looking at him, saying nothing. Cyrus continues.

“Maybe it's just me that feels that way… but I don't think it is. I was hoping maybe if we got some one on one time doing something romantic maybe… maybe you'd say something?”.

“You pretended you couldn't dance because you wanted me to admit I have feelings for you?”

“Yes.”

“Well, obviously I do. Even Jonah knows that. Why didn't you just ask?”

Cyrus gapes at him. He can't believe it was that easy. TJ hadn't even hesitated to admit it. “... I didn't think of that.”

“You know, for the smartest guy I've ever met, you're kind of dumb,” TJ says with a fond look. “You could've told me how you felt too.”

“Oh… hush,” Cyrus says. “Stop smirking it's not funny.”

“It's pretty funny,” TJ grins. Cyrus pushes himself up on to his tiptoes to reach him, and just to wipe the amused smile from his face he presses a gentle kiss to his lips.

TJ makes him want to tear his hair out sometimes, but it's in the best way possible.

[ecotone99]

[SF] Interdimensional

Pre-Prologue

Somewhere in the late 1890's portals have been opening up on Earth. And so, humans discovered the mysterious creatures from another dimension, The Lurk. Well, in reality, they discovered us. See, in the eyes of Thullians, the sentient life forms residing in the Lurk, our universe was a barren dimension, lacking life. Every ship they sent here found no sign of creatures. Suddenly all our alien based fantasies have dropped for something way more exciting.

Prologue

Insee opened his eyes. He was on duty today, on Earth, guarding the portals. He wasn't very happy with his job, really. In his childhood he was held high as the smartest student. But as the years went by, he praised less and less, and eventually became a mediocre learner. He ended up with, well, not the worst job. He was one of the first Thullians to arrive on Earth. These humans, they're very... Aggressive. Even in the threat of a highly advanced species discovering them that are quite capable of hurting- No! Destroying all they've worked for, they still have high demands! "Close those portals! They're dangerous!". Out of mere pity have we done anything to help them... and maybe curiosity. This whole dimension was thought to be lifeless. Of course, how else would you believe a desolate void full of chunks of gas and rock and ice with holes sprinkled about ready to suck in everything and let it all disperse. Even so, this little rock in the middle of nowhere. It had everything we looked for! Water, atmosphere, preferable distance from its star! Yet we still, almost hopelessly check, as if ready to find nothing, just as we did countless times before! And yet here he was. Guarding these stupid portals that we can't even close. Or hell, who knows, we probably can, but those idiotic researchers want tests and experiments and whatnot. Ugh! Of course, that's just speculation he'd heard from his co-workers. Maxermegk certainly said so, and he believes it oh, so much! As for Insee? He's kind of... neutral. All his mind can concentrate upon was his frustration over his failure in life and... and... Well... Suddenly his train of thought collapses as a swarm of Centikillers burst out of the portal. As he was trained, he whips out his weapon, firing at two of them and ready to shoot the third, only to be interrupted by it lunging at him. Of course, it was meaningless! He was protected, he had armor! Insee grasps the long body of the creature and slams it onto the surface of the Earth, leaping into the air. From up above, he aims his weapon and fires at the creature's head, killing it. Landing, he still hears a deafening screech. One of the monsters he'd shot still had its head intact, which meant it continued to live, even with it's split in half body. Crawling up to Insee he begins mindlessly firing at the ground. None of the shots hit it, at least not lethally, and it begins crawling up his leg. He starts shaking his leg around, attempting to get the creature off him. Eventually, he comes to his senses and grabs onto the creature's head, crushing it with his bare hand. He then steps into the portal, where his fate remains unknown to this day.

Chapter 1: August 4th, 1903, 01:18 PM

"After entering the portal, the Thullian guard never returns. The position for portal guard remains open in said area." Anne closes the newspaper to look at her brother. He seemed... uninterested. "Well?! Do you not wanna check out what happened there?" Says Anne, almost frustrated. He remains silent. "You're really acting strange today, Clyde. I'm worried. Are you alright?" He lifts his head up to look at his older sister. "I'm fine, I'm... I'm fine. Look, I'm just... I'm just kinda tired." "It's 1 PM, Clyde. It's not like you've done anything big today!" "I... I didn't really sleep last night and uhm..." Said Clyde, almost breaking into tears. "I... Are you...?" "There was this..." He sniffed. "...this creature... In my room..."

August 3rd, 1903, 11:48 PM

Clyde was covering himself under his blanket. He just had a horrible nightmare. He was outside looking at the sky when beams of light broke through the buildings of the city, and he could only watch helplessly. For some reason, he was very terrified of that. Something else he was terrified of, something more usual for a twelve-year-old boy, was the dark, which is why he hated that nightmare even more. He had been woken up in the middle of the night, and now all he could think about was whatever could be sitting in the shadows of his room. Of course, nothing ever was there, but tonight was different. Clyde felt the crippling fear of being watched and all he could do is hope his blanket could protect him from the dangers of the unknown. Eventually, his tiredness clouds his dark thoughts and he is slowly put to near sleep. When suddenly, a noise abruptly awakens him. He had done the worst mistake he could do: alert the monster of his presence. He pushes himself backward with his legs, covering his entire body with the blanket he held so tightly. He glanced towards whatever made the noise. A figure of a man obscured by shadows stood before Clyde. As it stepped more towards light Clyde realized whatever that was, it definitely wasn't human. A bulbous head layered with large scales resembling those of an isopod. Of course, Clyde didn't know this and presumed this was an alien. He covers his mouth not to scream before the creature somehow backs up into the shadows and seemingly disappears. He reluctantly gets up to turn on the light, noticing the creature indeed had vanished.

August 4th, 1903, 01:36 PM

Anne looks worryingly at her younger brother. The description of his experience was terrifying. "W...Well, umm..." Clyde eyed his sister down with a gloomy stare. Thundered by the weight of responsibility she quickly answers: "I... I've got a plan! We'll...." Clyde's face brightened up hearing his sister's words. "Ok, look, so we will..."

August 4th, 1903, 10:12 PM

Anne sat near the closed door to her brother's room. This wasn't the greatest plan but it might work. She just had to wait for that creature to appear again in Clyde's room, he will yell out to her, and she will come! Easy enough. Now she just had to sit there and not fall asleep. Not as easy as it sounds. But she had to do it! For Clyde, her baby brother.

August 5th, 1903, 12:54 AM

It has been almost three hours. On the verge of closing her eyes and succumbing to the grasp of deep sleep, Anne got up and entered her brother's room. Clyde was sleeping, and no monster was there at all. She returned to her room, grabbed her pillow and blanket, went back near Clyde's room, set herself up, and went to bed.

August 5th, 1903 10:48 PM

The next day came and went after the "failed" attempt last night. Technically they achieved their goal, Clyde slept peacefully. Only Clyde slept peacefully. Anne slept a full 2-hour nap before waking up at 3 in the morning not being able to go to sleep anymore. She didn't drink coffee, she never had. She heard of girls her age drinking coffee but she just didn't want to. Tonight she was about to get the sleep that she didn't last night. She went to sleep early and she was now waiting to fall asleep...

August 5th, 1903 11:52 PM

Anne awoke in a cold sweat. Eyeing every corner of her room, she layed back into her bed. It was as if she just had a nightmare, yet she didn't remember anything. And it didn't feel like she just wasn't remembering her dream, she just really didn't have one. Something else woke her up. Someone. Someone was in her room and she could feel it. She sprung back up to see it and indeed it was there. The silhouette of the same creature Clyde described was in her room, it's back covered by the light protruding through the open door. She took her blanket off and got down from her bed. She felt it looking at her, following her movement despite not seeing its face. She reached for her ax that she laid next to her nightstand before going to sleep. She grasped the handle tightly and reached for the creature. It quickly stepped out of her way, near a darker corner of the room. Was it gone? Anne couldn't tell. She turned on the light, and the creature was still there. Its bulbous disgusting head was illuminated by the lightbulb. It had the body of a human and the head of an Isopod. As she reached closer she came to a creepy realization. It wasn't the head of an Isopod, it was an Isopod wrapped around the head of a human. It was facing the wall, shivering almost. "Hello?" Muttered Anne. The creature ducked down and held itself, ready to be stuck by Anne's ax. She eyed the creature down, still holding tight onto her weapon. It turned it's gross head to look at the hesitant girl. It was clear she saw the creature's fear in its movement, and she was mercilessly looking at the poor being. Crouching now, it turned it's whole body to face Anne. They reached into their pocket to hand the girl something. It was a coin, not one that she could recognize. She grabbed it and inspected it in her hand, and as she put it down to look at the creature again, it had vanished. Confused, the girl looked at the coin again. It was from Earth, surely, but not from where she is from.

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