#Like i can plan around my pain im winter bc i kinda know what to expect. in spring its just fibe pretty decent days in a row

[bitchfitch]

I've enjoyed the reprieve from the seasonal affective disorder but i think we need to just go ahead and abolish spring. this shit sucks so bad.

[boyfriem-moved]

pl ea se info dump about your ocs

oh boy ok you,,, don’t want this but u already asked and it’s too late to go back so im just gonna start talking

ok so i have like 2 separate oc worlds and 3 seperate groups of ocs within those (these are just the main ones, there’s ones i don’t think abt anymore and ones i’ve abandoned and fan characters and stuff but if i went over all of that i’d be here all day so i’ll just stick with these)

so the first world is just our world, modern day, but with magic. there’s this one town, barnsley, georgia, that’s cut off from the rest of the world. most ppl drive by without ever noticing it, and if someone tries to go in who’s not wanted the town will disappear or try to kill them or just do something to keep them out. it’s a vaguely sentient town. in barnsley there’s a big forest and no one’s ever gone in and come out the other side. there’s ambiguous danger in the forest, mostly faeries who will make you fall in love with them and then kill you and harvest your bones and stuff.

so there’s like 4-6 characters depending on where we’re looking at in terms of what storyline i’m following (this is the one that i did nanowrimo for three (3) times and have over 100,000 words of thrown out content for and obsess over constantly so it has the most solid plot and there’s a lot of it) so anyways i’ll just go over all 6 and try to make it as simple as possible without talking about converging storylines and alternate drafts and stuff

ok! so! vi larson-park is the daughter of one of barnsley’s 3 great magicians! her mom could do all sorts of crazy magic and i can’t get into the parents’ backstory here bc they have a whole OTHER story and that’s just. too much (maybe i’ll do that later? we’ll see) so yeah her mom did magic and also made some bad deals and stole some stuff from the woods and indirectly caused some ppls deaths but it’s like fine probably. so vi grew up with her mom, natalie, her mom’s witch girlfriend, erica, and erica’s twin brother, simon (who i’ll get into later and also who doesn’t exist in half the scrapped drafts) in this big empty DEFINITELY HAUNTED house on the edge of town where erica grew up and they were good and happy. then like a year ago natalie was killed by nick, who i’ll also get into later, and that’s kinda the end of her story, vi and erica are obviously devastated and they have a funeral and vi starts having the occasional odd dream here and there, but things go back to normal after awhile. vi has absolutely no aptitude for magic, and because of that she often feels alienated by erica and simon who are VERY magical and always talking about things she doesn’t understand. she’s fiercely loyal and protective and not really scared of anything. she’s always wanted to know what’s in the woods but knows better than to go looking

tyler is vi’s best friend and also 50% whole entire Not Human. he either came from the woods or was found outside a random gas station in like arizona or something depending on which draft i’m going by, but either way he was found around two years ago and has been clinging to vi ever since. his backstory is a big unknown to the human characters and no one really knows anything about him. he’s a faerie prince, the son of the erlking, who’s sort of the ambiguous villain of the story but i’ll get into him later. he has 3 brothers, sorrel, dain, and kell. sorrel is the oldest and known as the winter prince, then there’s kell for spring, dain for summer, and tyler himself for autumn. (btw his name isn’t actually tyler technically it’s robin but i'm not gonna get into that rn.) sorrel is cool and collected and stone cold bitch, and all he wants is to be king so he roped tyler into helping him try and kill their dad, which failed, so then he lost his position in the royal court and now he’s doing tons of morally gray stuff in an attempt to get back in his dad’s favor so he can kill him for real this time. dain and kell are sort of nothing at all and you don’t need to know anything except dain is really mean and violent and kell is an ally(?). after the whole failed killing debacle tyler ran away to barnsley in hopes that he could find something in common with the humans, since he’d been a faerie all his life and couldn’t stand it. he’s quiet and doesn’t like doing or saying things unless he absolutely has to, is generally unhelpful unless something benefits him, scared of being alone, hates being indoors, runs around barefoot and only eats food from the woods. he’s kinda like an outdoor cat.

nick and marcus jacobs are brothers and general hooligans. nick is the older one (he’s 19) and marcus is 15 and they grew up in barnsley for the first 14 years of marcus’ life until marcus accidentally killed their dad and they left town. which the dad killing subplot is really a lot to get into but basically their dad was the second magician, along with vi’s mom, except the effects of magic on a person can kinda drive a person insane and the others managed to keep it together but he slowly went crazy until he was paranoid and in pain all the time and ended up taking a lot of it out on his sons which ended in him threatening marcus and marcus in an act of self defense unleashing raw magic power he didn’t know he had and accidentally killing him and also taking out all the power in the entire town and causing a minor earthquake. it was a Big Deal. so yeah they buried their dad in the backyard and skipped town. after their dad died all his magic went down to nick so nick has newfound power (marcus btw has never been able to use magic since then and has no idea how he did it) but he also has voices in his head and weird dreams, and with all the voices yelling at him all the time he realizes that the only way to get rid of them is to get rid of the magicians. his dad did some magic bullshit that made him the vessel for the magic once he died but the other magicians didn’t so he doesn’t have to kill anyone besides them and it makes sense bc i say it does shut up. so for like a year they drive around aimlessly, meet with and kill vi’s mom, meet with and kill aidan’s dad (i’ll get to aidan once i’m done here), pick up a hitchhiker depending on which version of the story i’m telling, then go back home where they’re not really welcome anymore but that won’t stop them. nick is cold and mean and. y’know. a murderer, but he also loves marcus greatly and gets attached to people more easily than he would like to admit. he’s sort of closed himself off and resigned himself to killing “for the greater good”, but it’s hard for him, and there’s definitely people he wouldn’t kill. he fully planned to, once he got rid of the magicians, never kill again, and he keeps that promise. marcus is soft spoken and anxiety ridden and a bit of a crybaby and he hates death and doesn’t fully trust nick and doesn’t trust himself either. on the outside he appears bitter and angry constantly.

aidan mulligan is a HOOLIGAN! a whole entire rowdy boy! he’s also the son of the third magician and marcus’ ex(?) boyfriend? more like boyfriend on standby. it’s complicated. there’s nothing special to him, he’s rowdy bc his parents never gave him enough attention so he runs around with people he doesn’t really like and is always getting into trouble. his favorite activities are skipping church and running the local cryptid watch am radio station, which no one listens to and which he used to run with marcus. he misses marcus dearly and keeps waiting for him to come back. he’s loud and talkative and his mood changes drastically but is always on the highest setting. he’s either screaming-and-throwing-things angry or unable to shut up and bouncing all over the place. not to pick favorites but he’s my favorite i really love him. his life moto is “fuck you dad” basically. oh yeah nick killed his dad and stuff and it’s hit him hard but he’s not as torn up by it as he probably should be, which he feels terrible about. his mom lives on the other side of the country and doesn’t currently know his dad is dead, which isn’t really something you’re supposed to keep secret generally but the mulligan family said fuck the rules. he has two brothers, connor and seamus (connor older, seamus younger) and loves both of them though he would never admit it.

simon diederich is the secret special bonus magician!! also i think i gotta talk abt parent backstory for him so,,,, here goes: basically, simon and vi’s mom and marcus and aidan’s dads all stole magic from the forest in a way that doesn’t super make sense but it’s my story i can do what i want. and in the process simon died and they had to leave him behind in the woods, but then since the magic in the forest was weak it couldn’t continue being formless or else it would turn into nothing since so much of it had been damaged by the humans or w/e. so it took simon’s body as a vessel and resurrected him with all his old memories but also 100% more magic power. so he took that power and went back home and has been just straight chillin, unaging, for 30-ish years. he got like. immense wisdom when he was resurrected and is also possessed by a sentient forest so he does what the forest wants which is protect the town and fistfight anyone he doesn’t like. he’s obnoxious and immature and thinks he’s hot shit and loves these trees more than he loves other people probably

bonus character: lila is the ghost who lives in vi’s attic. she’s like 7. i love her

THAT HURT MY FINGERS TO TYPE. I HAD TO MOVE TO GOOGLE DOCS TO DO THIS BC TUMBLR KEPT LAGGING AND MY WORD COUNT IS NEARING 2000 BUT W/E LETS KEEP GOING

next, still in the same universe, are the residents of greywell, washington. greywell is what’s on the other side of those woods no one can cross in barnsley. how does that work? magic obviously. greywell is a lot like barnsley but more sinister, it’s a lot newer so the characters aren’t as fleshed out (with one exception) and there’s really only 3 i actually care abt so this ones gonna be a lot shorter. i’ve thought abt plot but nothing solid so there’s some...stuff but mostly this one will be short

zoe hammond: amateur teen witch who’s also cursed. she has an eye on her left hand which is always watching her and she wants off desperately. u know how i said in some versions of the story nick and marcus pick up a hitchiker? that’s her, going to barnsley bc she knows its magic and hopes someone there will know how to fix her. she respects authority and stays in line for the most part, but she also takes shit from no one. she’ll talk to nearly anyone but doesn’t particularly like anyone in town, also she sells witch shit out of the trunk of her car in the school parking lot

wesley: short rowdy trans boy with absolutely no self control who’s stoned all the time and does crazy things for the adrenaline rush and doesn’t bind safely and falls in love with every boy he meets. he skateboards bc of course he does. he’s always ready to fight and punches ppl a lot but usually ends up losing fights bc he’s tiny. i love him

noa: ok this dude went into the woods one (1) time and now there’s this magic glove stuck on their hand? and a ghost in their phone?? and they’re literally so confused and they’ve never had any friends in their entire life but all of a sudden that weird lesbian witch and her crazy skateboarder friend are talking to them all the time and they died? except they woke back up like nothing had happened even though their head basically blew up? and there’s like faeries and stuff coming after them because they want the glove and they can’t get the stupid thing off their hand and they have no idea what’s going on noa is an absolute nervous wreck who’s really fun to draw and they have no idea what’s happening to them and tbh i don’t rly know what i’m doing either but i’m having a good time

ada: the phone ghost.

last set!! i have them all done already from this thing i did with @dogstoes so i’ll just paste them in but first background:

this is a completely separate world, it’s like this 1910s era fictional city with magic and shit. the magic system is kinda complicated but basically there’s elemental magicians who are heavily tied to religion, they’re believed to be sacred and god sent by p much every organized religion. they do elements, it’s pretty simple. then there’s blood magicians who can basically transmute but they have to use their own blood to do it. anyone can learn to be a blood magician but most ppl don’t want to bc. blood ow. blood magicians are an ABOMINATION AGAINST GOD and there’s a stigma against them in religious communities so they tend to populate big cities and less religious places. there’s also healers who are born like elementals and can’t be trained, they’re isolated from both schools of magic bc unlike elementals they’re not pure (well, depending on which religion you ask) and unlike blood magicians they’re not common. born magicians are born with pure black eyes (irises? the colored part. not just all black) that differentiate them from nonmagic ppl. there’s also super intense mary sue magicians who r rare and born with red eyes (i started this world when i was 13 don’t judge me bitch) and they can shapeshift kinda? but in cool ways, it’s not just shapeshifting they could also make their skin tough or nails pointy or w/e. one of them specifically likes to harden his own blood in weapons it’s kinda metal. anyways here’s the character profiles from the google doc pasted in word for word

Characters (bc i suddenly decided this is Sharin With Rivers material If You Shall Take It):

So basically there's these 2 gangs, run by this woman Lyra Frey and this dude Lucas Sweeney, and they Do Not Like Each Other At All. Neither of them are good bc yknow...gangs….but lyra’s is like...better anyways here's characters

Lyra's dudes:

Emil Finch: 21, any and all pronouns, ace, lyra’s right hand man/ veteran of a bloody civil war (TECHNICALLY a war criminal but yknow…it's whatever). Likes cats and Arya, dislikes cigarettes and being short. Their birth name is Emilee, which they  shortened to their liking when they moved to The Big City, and they used their father's name (Finn O'Malley) to join the war. They're a healer magician but ssshhh don't tell anyone. They used their powers to hurt people when they were in The War and now don't trust themselves, so they stick to traditional medicine thank you very much. (Also knives. They’re a big fan of knives.)

Arya Frey: 21, she/her, Lyra’s adopted daughter and mechanic. She has METAL LEGS and has to walk with a cane so she doesn't go outside much, mostly makes machines and strategizes for her mom. Likes drawing, Emil, making things/taking them apart, dislikes cold weather (it makes her joints hurt), magic, Drunk Emil. She has two cats named vriska and karkat. Everyone is suspicious of these names even though it's like 1910 and an alternate universe and homestuck doesn't exist.

Jaz Anaheim: 18, he/him, big gay disaster, a pickpocket who came to the Big City with his brother when he was 16 to work and send money to his mom, stole from a kingpin, joined a gang, watched his brother die in front of him, and lied to his mom for 2 years about his job and his brothers aliveness while he sent her blood money. He's a humble farm boy, no magic, tall and uncoordinated, basically all he can do is steal and flirt badly and he's very aware. Also where he came from magicians were rare because they were all drafted for the war so when he sees magic he's way too impressed. Likes loud music, people being interested in him, his family (just his mom now :’)), his hometown, dislikes the city, feeling disliked, himself, swimming

Sweeney’s band of assholes:

Elliott Sweeney: 24, he/him, Sweeney’s son and certified dad hater. He's a blood magician which are common and not that impressive but he’s good at what he does bc he did nothing but practice for like 6 years. His dad basically controls him and makes him work for him because he's useful. He resents his dad with every ounce of his being but doesn't have the spine to do anything about it. After accidentally burning down part of their house and killing his mom his dad sent him away to the summer house in the country, where he lived for the past 6 years, obediently doing his dad’s bidding and learning how to control his magic until he got fed up and burned that house down (on purpose this time), making his dad move him back to the family house in the city so that he could keep an eye on him. he’s one of those badass mega magicians who does blood swords and stuff, he’s also spent so much time reading that he knows a lot about magic theory. Quiet, reserved, extremely petty, but shows a sense of humor around his sister. Never really knew Alise growing up so he’s more of a cool uncle than a brother. Likes his sister, learning things, astronomy, dislikes his dad, Emil, doing magic, fighting, feeling trapped

Alise Sweeney: 14, she/her, her dad named her Alise with an S because he's just that much of an asshole. She's a self trained blood magician and good at what she does. She hates her dad almost as much as Elliott does but she's also not a fucking baby about it. Is DEFINITELY planning on killing him at some point. Was raised to make jokes and do crime and her brother said if she does crime she's grounded. Has never been serious about anything ever, and probably has a screw loose. Has killed people. Is basically a tiny fighting machine. Her dad was rough on her growing up. Likes picking fights, Elliott and Atticus, pissing off her dad, causing trouble. Dislikes her dad, people stronger than her, tense situations, being alone

Atticus Grey: 16, he/him, not Sweeney’s son but hates him enough that he probably could be (in case you were noticing a theme here, sweeney is kinda unlikeable). His mom left soon after he was born and his dad ran up a huge debt and ended up working for Sweeney to pay it off, then died in a gang fight before he could get through it. Sweeney, the merciless motherfucker that he is, decided that Atticus would finish paying it off, and snatched him up as soon as he was 13. His dad used to hang out with Emil’s and so they ended up taking care of parentless Atticus (along with (extremely reluctant) Arya. Atticus is really close with Lyra’s entire crew because he's spent so much time around them. He's a fire magician who knows a bit of blood magic but barely uses it, and he's an angsty bitch. Likes Emil, being alone, dislikes everything else.

oh yeah then there’s those bitches in charge:

Lyra Frey is a [REDACTED] year old woman from [REDACTED] who moved to the city while fleeing from [REDACTED]. She was in the civil war briefly, fighting for the [REDACTED] side. Her real name is not Lyra, but is actually [REDACTED]. She loves Arya more than anything else probably. Sees Jaz as an unofficial son, is skeptical of Atticus, likes Emil but doesn’t trust them.

Lucas Sweeney is one of those rich bastards who also does crime on the side. He’s a politician but everyone and their mother knows he’s an absolute crime lord on the side. Has arguably more power than Lyra but has no idea how to use it, plus Alise has already recruited like half his employees into joining her uprising. He’s a selfish man and a terrible dad. No one likes him.

uh yeah that is. all!! this is over 3000 words jesus do asks have a word limit? i sure hope not

[hyungkyun]

(^:

HENLO!!! this is ur actual bday present, not that Gross thing i sent earlier lol. again, do whatever u want with it!! u dont have to post it or anything. it’s just easier to submit stuff like this than to, idk, send u an email like a señora lol.

ok so im doing this in bullet point format bc the last time I wrote a coherent, well-written paragraph was like 5 years ago or smth. anyway!! since u hated soooo much my beautiful, amazing, unique goths au im going with the loser couple au… which was also a college au of sorts?? dskjhksjdf this isn’t even an au, since y’all are already losers tbh (^: this also got out of hand…. this shit is eight pages long. idk enjoy bithc.

first of all, ck the kind of dude everyone’s lowkey scared of bc he’s silent and serious af. also he does seem kind of a weirdo, tbh?

youve seen him around, maybe you’re in the same dorms but u have absolutely no idea what he’s majoring in :o and u ask around but no one has any idea either!! oh wow a mystery~~

BUT he’s kinda cute hmmm (^: and u probably find the weirdo vibe interesting

however it’s so hard to get to talk to him. u always run into him when you’re out with friends or in a hurry to get to class so :///

but destiny works in mysterious ways~~~ and once u meet it’s rly. so unexpected.

actually, it’s awful since u get locked out of ur dorm sound familiar?? during winter break, rly late at night after a long study session at the library yes, the library, fight me. so u kinda just. sit down miserably outside ur room, since ur roommates are gone, cursing everything and everyone. u will eventually go looking for someone to help u out or smth but right now u need to Whine.

but oh my!! enter mister im changkyun!!! that weirdo who actually lives a couple of doors away from u (how come you never found out wtf???)

he sees u basking in ur misery and actually. finds u rly cute??? bc you’re pouting, cursing a little under ur breath, fumbling with ur phone. but u also look angry as fuck, ready to kill a man??? and yet you’re really fucking cute what the hell!!!!

so he comes up to u and asks u what’s wrong, to which u answer not so nicely without even looking up from ur phone, bc you’re rly so done with this situation ://

but then u look up and u See who it is fuck fuck fuck fuckfucbicvufkhkcfj

but since ck’s Nice and he understands that u must be having an awful time (and also bc he thinks youre cute) he offers to help u. you’re kind of skeptical since he’s just another student, what could he do???

until he tells u he knows how to pick locks lmaoaoaoaoa. that lil weirdo (‘:

anyway he saves ur night. but since he’s an annoying lil shit he’ll tease u abt it every time he runs into u for the rest of winter break.

since that day y'all basiclly become an old, bickering, married couple fnsdjdj

u never stop annoying each other…. you’re wearing a hoodie? he’ll probably pull the hood all the way down until it covers ur eyes, and u get him back by messing up his hair which, by the way,is so soft….. hmmmm

u call each other nerd and loser and dumbass all the time lmao. he’ll constantly bring up the way u met just to jokingly say that you’d be lost without him :/// he rly is a lil shit.

it’s funny bc everyone figures out u are falling for each other… except u two. and i rly do mean everyone. ur friends. his friends. ur roommates. ur cat. the janitor, too, probably. it’s so obvious it hurts.

one time someone implies u would be a cute couple and y'all literally go all ‘no???? haha me??? liking that loser??? pfft not in a million years’

it’s the biggest lie, of course (: and ever since that person suggested u would look good together, both of u kind of realize it’d be… nice. more than nice. actually, super nice.

but since both of u are dumb tsunderes,  as ive said before, u will literally be the embodiment of this scene… except it goes both ways. honestly u are so gone for each other it’s GROSS.

but we need some angst up in here so y'all dont get together for a reaaaaaaally long time :/ smh. the pining is Real. ppl come and go in ur lives, and each person u go out with sees that u already fell for someone else—and that’s why all potential relationships don’t last much–, but sdjkfhksjdhk!!! neither of u want to openly admit it.

it’s A Mess bc u are actually good friends and u tell each other abt ur dates and stuff—secretly hoping the other will do something—but y'all looove being dumb so u act like it’s all cool and be like ‘o rly!! good for u, i hope it works out’. right. :/

y’all keep dancing around each other for several months until one Merciful Soul gets tired of ur shit and forces u to sort things out. im talking abt locking u up in some room and not letting u out until u stop pretending u aren’t disgustingly in love with each other. or smthequally cheesy (: u know ilove cheese

((obviously everyone eavesdrops through the door bc cmon, theyve been waiting for this for sooooo long))

at first u two are just annoyed at the Merciful Soul betchait was minhyuk, and u spend ur time yelling and cursing them for doing this (all while claiming that this is pointless, since u have NO feelings for each other. none. nada!)

after a very long time, it’s ck the one that confesses first lmao. youve been whining and being grumpy the whole time youve been locked up together and it kinda reminded him of the way u met… damn. here come The Feelings.

he’s tired, and there’s nothing left to lose. so he tells u The Truth.

[suspenseful pause….. what’s going to happen next?? :OOOOO]……… tune in next year to find out, in the continuation of Cristina’s Cheesy Birthday Present!!!

jk, proceed to the next bullet point pls.

obviously u tell him u feel the same way [insert ppl crying in the background] and he’s actually shocked when u say u like him back…. and gosh, he does look cute when he’s surprised…

so yeah!!! it’s until then that u FINALLY go on a date during the weekend!!. hallelujah. thanks minhyuk,u beautiful soul.

so!!! ok!! first date!!! a rly cute fairground in the evening!!!

u try to be fake mean to each other like u used to but everything feels different~~~ (^:

so instead y’all act bashful as hell, and blush at everything jjdfghjfhd. hands brushing accidentally?? BLUSH. eyes meeting? BLUSH. BLUSH BLUSH BLUSH!!! u also laugh at everything bc both of u are so nervous oh gmhg fdknjjkdsfjoidf this is gross.

he’ll tell bad jokes to make u laugh and they’re rly so so so bad that he actually keeps u in stitches. if u look rly closely you’ll see his huge ass heart eyes bc !!!! he made u laugh!!!! and u look so pretty when u laugh omg!!!! dis-gos-tinnnnn

it’d be such a cute date tbh im crying just thinking abt it (‘’’’: obviously he’s a gentleman and he lets u choose what to eat, which ride to go to first, etc. u could literally tell him ‘hey let’s just sit down and do nothing’ and he’d say yes. he’s so gONe, ifmgfjdmf.

he’s kinda quiet and a lot shier than u wouldve expected but youre literally melting bc that’s a new side to him that you’d never thought you’d see.

u end up having so much fun (‘: u gross lil idiots, u.

oh and he’s def the type to ask if he can kiss u at the end of the night EYYYYYY

even if u find that incredibly endearing you’ll probably roll ur eyes with a huge ass smile on urlips lmaoaoaoao and call him a dummy for even asking when you’ve literally be in cloud nine since ur date started kjkhwjeqdkwjlk  

[hello, brief break to clarify that from this point i forgot this was actually a college au lmao, so the rest of the bullet points are literally just. random facts abt u two dating hhhhhh. We dont even know what ck’s major is odjfngnfdj]  

at first things are a lil awkward in ur relationship tbh

catch ck googling ‘how to relationship’ on a daily basis dnfndkfjdncn he is sort of clueless abt how to handle The Feelings. mostly bc this is Important and the last thing he wants is to mess it up )^:

that goes away eventually, tho!! he’ll start being his weird little self real fucking soon, so Get Ready

u still call each other nerd and all that stuff, but ur voices are dripping with fondness when u say it… literally everyone around u gets cavities from it, ew.

he’s not that big on planning dates but from time to time he’ll take u to rly cool, unexpected, interesting places :o  and eventually he’ll show u his favorite secret spots ((’:

study dates are a thing. i bet he’s that type of person that enjoys reading in weird ass positions… his legs are like, halfway off the couch and his arm is bent in a way that looks almost painful… what the hell….?? but it’s fine (: it goes so well with ur study methods, those that are Too Weird for the library, yeah?? (:

he will also stare at u a lot bc u look cute when you’re rly focused on smth that is, when u stop  whining abtstudying…

every time u catch him doing that you’ll go all ‘stop staring at me!!! wtf are u looking at u weirdo’ and he’ll answer ‘you’re so pretty~~~ ♥️♥️♥️’. you’ll blush like a lil idiot, naturally (^: hmmmm

and yea, yea. nap dates are a thing too :/// with sleepy forehead kisses and raspy voices and tangled limbs. all that sappy stuff. he’s a lil shit tho, so he’ll sometimes poke ur ribs to tickle u lmao.

buuuut he’ll also take a lot of pics of u sleeping bc he thinks youre cute )))): his faves always end up being his wallpaper for months.

he’ll get strange gifts for u, like rly bizarre plushies and rare books on topics he thinks u will like,  tacky anime memorabilia, etc. he’ll always give them to u at random times bc he just saw them and reminded him of u ♥️  

he makes a lot of playlists for u too!!! pls listen closely, he puts a lot more thought into them than he lets on.

u like his selfies??? well he’ll send u a lot of those. unfortunately, bc he’s a lil shit, he’ll mostly send double chins and weird ass faces from equally weird angles  

from time to time he’ll send u a Nice One tho ((((^: and u know, tongue selfies since youreSO fond of his(and I quote) “5ft tongue”. and oh gosh! is that a tongue piercing…??? eyyyyyy

if u want to take couple selfies then you’re gonna have a real hard time bc he’ll always be making weird faces and poses just to be annoying. eventually u will make dumb faces too tho (’: what a couple of losers

expect weird random texts: he loves telling u abt whatever is on his mind—probably aliens. he thinks a lot abt aliens and the universe. throw some conspiracy theories in there, too—. he’ll also send obscure memes. and a lot of russian cats!!

he’ll love ur cosplay hobbie. he thinks it’s super cool. he’ll call u a nerd but don’t be fooled! he totally brags abt it with his friends (^:

oh! and this is unrelated but at some point y'all will look like an emo goth couple. u won’t even realize that you’re both wearing black and looking Edgy, it’ll just happen spontaneously. tragic 😔

there are a lot of comfortable silences when u hang out, but late night deep convos are also fundamental :o!!! bc y'all are Smort.

he’ll act like f*cboi from time to time tbh?? he’ll tell lots of dirty jokes LMAO. u roll ur eyes at him a lot bc they’re rly. so bad.

if he winks or does Eyebrow Things then u can’t rly roll ur eyes and act like you’re annoyed bc (: u like it (: and u think it suits him (: and he knows it (: (: (:

u get back at him by telling him he’s cute tho, and he’ll get all shy and he’ll stutter and saying “noooooo” while also fighting back a smile

he will also howl or bark at u to annoy u jdfhkjdf. damn f*rry ://

on that note, he loves to embarrass u in front of ur friends bc he’s a lil shit :DD

But he’s also the sweetest??? whenever he sees you’re feeling down he’ll start doing weird shit to make u laugh. if that doesn’t work then he’ll hug u real tight without saying anything else, bc that’s Enough, u know?? (’:

ok time to get Domestic lads!!!

Idk who the hell is going to cook bc y'all are a damn mess in the kitchen. u two try to cook Nice Meals sometimes. seven times out of ten u end up ordering takeout lmao.

be prepared: he sings in the shower, and he does so terribly. (he might do it a little louder and a little more off-key sometimes bc he knows it makes u laugh)

random kisses are a thing!!! he kisses ur cheek or ur shoulder or ur nape or literally. any body part he can get his lips on when u two are just hanging out, watching movies or smth. it’s so soft and cute )^: wtf im crying

but also stolen kisses!! he’ll kiss u at the most unexpected of times and it alwaysleaves u breathless

he’ll constantly put his head on ur shoulder and make this face at u (^:  

can’t sleep??? don’t worry!!! he’ll sing to u with that pretty, soothing voice of his

anyway. what I meant is that y’all would be such cute little idiots together this was long af. wow. im so sorry. happy birthday??? lmao

I HAD TO PUT THIS UNDER A READ MORE BC ITS SO FUCKING LONG NAT U DUMBASS ICB U DID THIS KFJSKFJSLKDJFLKJ THIS IS SO CHEESY AND GROSS and it also made me realize that u know too much shit abt me. what was that t*ngue part. im not talking to u ever again. aNYWAY U RLY ARE AN IDIOT I WAS SMILING SO BIG THRU THIS WHOLE THING MAYBE I SCREAMED A LITTLE?????????? FUCK U!!!!!!!! WHATS WITH ‘The Feelings’ PART I HATE THAT I ALMOST DIED FUCK OFF IM NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!! I DONT HAVE FEELINGS!!!!!! U CANT DO THIS TO ME SKJFHSKJDHFKSLDJFH 

icb u rly did the fairground first date i rly fucking hate u why did i even tell u these things i knew it was gonna fire back im fjjgjkknknnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn ur ‘tragic 😔’ when we become a goth couple :/ u dont understand goth love

why the fuck did u make him howl. i wanna fucking die rn. what the fuck. he fucking would. fuck off.

i dont wanna talk abt all that domestic shit how did u even write all of that without dying i literally wanna rip all my limbs off i wont make any comment. i didnt need to know what that would be like but u looooove ruining my life so :)

i rly hate u ksdjfhskdjhfksjh icb u did this thank u i wanna die??????????? wtf nat !!!!! no but rly thank u :( u took the time to write this long ass college au (is it????? whats cks major tho rly :/ ) and just skdfjsjk u remembered all the weird shit i told u thats cute and also Really Bad what else do u know that i forgot i told u skdfksjh im literally always screaming at u abt this shit how did u !!! remember all of this!!!!! dldskfjshljhlakjsh this is so cute and horrible nat wtf how could u :( now im gonna cry :(

[8147]

reading hamlet for the first time (act 5: the finale)

masterlist

none of you told me it was going to be this painful . none of you.

a5s1

“Ophelia’s dead.” “Enter CLOWNS!”

Like im sure this has a different meaning in EMA but im gonna make fun of it because it’s fucking hilarious. (future (present? (now past once more (?))) antares coming back to say i did look at nfs and yeah theyre gravediggers)

“First Clown: What is he that builds stronger than either the mason, the shipwright, or the carpenter? Second Clown: The gallows-maker; for that frame outlives a thousand tenants.” damn not even just this one quote but these are some depressing clowns

hamlet and horatio!

okay there’s something about all of hamlet’s skull talk that makes me uneasy. like, not even the topic, just something in the words and how earnestly and (pardon my pun) gravely hamlet’s speaking about this. and it’s almost a mournful tune, too. it’s a huge difference from his “we’ll all be eaten by the same worms” speech to the point that it’s almost haunting.

“HAMLET: I will speak to this fellow.” C O N F R O N T

“HAMLET: I think it be thine, indeed; for thou liest in't.” (incomprehensible scribbling)

HAMLET, NOT IN ENGLAND: oh yeah lol he was sent to england huh u know why lmao

wait. did the. did the pirate situation get resolved. before act V.

I mean i think hamlet mentioned something about three years but the pirates are so fucking glossed over like what the fuck

“First Clown: 'Twill, a not be seen in him there; there the men are as mad as he.” HOLY SHIT ROAST THEM JFC

“HAMLET: Let me see. (Takes the skull)” THIS IS THE SKULL SCENE! I fucking KNEW it was bullshit that holding the skull was in the to be/not to be speech. I saw it being presented as such like once or twice while reading and I KNEW IT

hm okay so hamlet picks up this guys skull, of someone he used to know, and sure maybe i could ignore the “those lips i have kissed” but then he goes on to mention alexander the great and i mean come on

but jesus like i feel like im not doing justice to the stuff hamlet’s saying. just, the gravity of it all. Its kinda hitting home a bit hard bc like ive had a crippling fear of what happens after death and being forgotten etc since i was like in fourth grade and this is @ing that phobia

like, with that julius ceasar thing. “O that that earth which kept the world in awe / should patch a wall to expel the winter flaw,” it’s so strange. like, every fucking human who has lived, whether they be emperors, murderers, inventors, peasants, or philanthropists- as long as they weren’t blind, they’ve all looked at the same sky. like. It doesnt matter what the fuck you did or didn’t. It’s wild.

“First Priest: No more be done: We should profane the service of the dead To sing a requiem and such rest to her As to peace-parted souls.” hey i get that there are cultural taboos around suicide but like this guy’s a dick it isnt even clear if it was suicide, like, she was so fucking crazy she might not have even known she was, y’know, in a lake or w/e

laertes, dude, my guy. maybe jumping into a grave is cosmic foreshadowing for something you don’t want to happen to you. js.

“HAMLET: [Advancing] What is he whose grief Bears such an emphasis? whose phrase of sorrow Conjures the wandering stars, and makes them stand Like wonder-wounded hearers? This is I, Hamlet the Dane. (Leaps into the grave)” hamlet is NOT one to be out-extra’d (posting-antares here to say, wait, ‘whose phrase of sorrow conjures the stars? is this my aesthetic-speeches-summon-ghosts theory? probably not, but i havent mentioned it for a while)

“LAERTES: The devil take thy soul! (Grappling with him)” IN A FUCKING GRAVE. THEY ARE FIGHTING. IN A GRAVE.

all because hamlet doesn’t want to be out-extra’d. my god.

“QUEEN GERTRUDE: This is mere madness: And thus awhile the fit will work on him; Anon, as patient as the female dove, When that her golden couplets are disclosed, His silence will sit drooping.” Ah yes gertie just talk about the distraught and angry madman as if he isn’t there. that’ll diffuse the situation.

You know what? We still haven’t discussed the pirates.

a5s2

“HAMLET: So much for this, sir: now shall you see the other; You do remember all the circumstance?” If this isn’t gonna be about the pirates im gonna. scream.

“HAMLET: My fears forgetting manners, to unseal Their grand commission; where I found, Horatio,-- O royal knavery!--an exact command, Larded with many several sorts of reasons Importing Denmark's health and England's too, With, ho! such bugs and goblins in my life, That, on the supervise, no leisure bated, No, not to stay the grinding of the axe, My head should be struck off.” god, though. imagine that. being exiled to another country by the person who killed your father, only to find out that they were going to have you killed, anyways. that’s fucking terrifying. jesus christ.

Damn this idea that pretty handwriting is ~beneath~ nobles confuses me so fucking much. I got called haughty once just because my main handwriting is cursive. I mean, they were right, but their evidence was circumstantial at best.

“HAMLET: That, on the view and knowing of these contents, Without debatement further, more or less, He should the bearers put to sudden death, Not shriving-time allow'd.” Hamlet’s Revenge. 

but also, what the fuck, dude. two wrongs dont make a right.

damn i kinda lost myself while reading but it really doesn’t sound like hamlet’s insane anymore. Like he’s… tempered himself. he doesn’t feel insane, just solemn.

“OSRIC: Your lordship is right welcome back to Denmark. HAMLET: I humbly thank you, sir. Dost know this water-fly?” goddamn ROAST HIM HAMLET (also what a fucking mood)

Osric put on your fucking ha--

The wind is

The wind is northerly

“HAMLET: No, believe me, 'tis very cold; the wind is northerly.” I remember someone saying that this is important

Okay here: “HAMLET: I am but mad north-north-west: when the wind is southerly I know a hawk from a handsaw.”

oh no

Osric just wear ur fucking hat u doof

“OSRIC: Exceedingly, my lord; it is very sultry,--as 'twere,--I cannot tell how. But, my lord, his majesty bade me signify to you that he has laid a great wager on your head: sir, this is the matter,-- HAMLET: I beseech you, remember-- (HAMLET moves him to put on his hat)” excuse me a WAGER

but alas all hamlet cares about is osric’s fucking hat

“HAMLET: What's his weapon? OSRIC: Rapier and dagger. HAMLET: That's two of his weapons: but, well.” hamlet u sarcastic little shit i love you

I mean so is horatio. I love him too.

This stuff with the competition is. not gonna end well. not at well.

“HAMLET: I do not think so: since he went into France, I have been in continual practise: I shall win at the odds. But thou wouldst not think how ill all's here about my heart: but it is no matter.”

hamlet no. listen to your heart or whatever. jesus christ don’t do it.

“HORATIO: Nay, good my lord,--” HAMLET LISTEN TO HORATIO

Ohhh hamlet

okay reading what laertes said, you know what? i’m giving laertes one last chance. please do not prove me a fool, laertes. 

everything is giving me mad anxiety. e v e r y t h i n g.

claud’s speech is insanely sketchy

“KING CLAUDIUS: [Aside] It is the poison'd cup: it is too late.” One, so that’s why it was sketchy. Two, the POISONED CUP?

IT’S TOO LATE?

Gertie’s. Dead.

Shit, shit, shit

“LAERTES: [Aside] And yet 'tis almost 'gainst my conscience.” YES! SO PLEASE! STOP FIGHTING!

“LAERTES wounds HAMLET; then in scuffling, they change rapiers, and HAMLET wounds LAERTES.” Oh no oh no oh jeez eheu they’re hurting each other, shit, fuck,

“LAERTES: ...woodcock…”

“KING CLAUDIUS: She swounds to see them bleed. QUEEN GERTRUDE: No, no, the drink, the drink,--O my dear Hamlet,-- The drink, the drink! I am poison'd. (Dies)” one, i love how claud is desperatley trying to stick to the plan, its almost adorable in a childish sort of way. two, oh god. ohhh god. gertie. 

Oh no. 

this is the bloodbath. THIS IS THE BLOODBATH.

BODY COUNT: 1

“HAMLET: The point!--envenom'd too! Then, venom, to thy work. (Stabs KING CLAUDIUS)” ...

BODY COUNT: 2

wait and hamlet’s on death row, as with laertes. Oh no.

“LAERTES: He is justly served; It is a poison temper'd by himself. Exchange forgiveness with me, noble Hamlet: Mine and my father's death come not upon thee, Nor thine on me. (Dies)’ oh my god already??? I haven’t even really accepted king claud’s death?? jesus christ??

My friend just sorta nudged me and asked if i was alright and i. I’m not. i’m in shock. goddamn. what?

BODY COUNT: 3

goodness thats three in like less than thirty seconds JESUS CHRIST

“HAMLET: Heaven make thee free of it! I follow thee.I am dead, Horatio.” that’s chilling. just, the poignancy. that’s so fucking spectral. i’m not okay.

“HORATIO: Never believe it: I am more an antique Roman than a Dane: Here's yet some liquor left.” No no no on no nononon NO NO oh my god are you going to-

“HAMLET: As thou'rt a man, Give me the cup: let go; by heaven, I'll have't. … If thou didst ever hold me in thy heart Absent thee from felicity awhile, And in this harsh world draw thy breath in pain, To tell my story.” hey i’m crying in study hall. i’m actually crying. what the fuck. I don’t cry unless i’m thinking about that one pair of 18th century shoes with the really good photo quality (transcribing-antares here. I fucking love those shoes. I’m looking at them right now and they’re so fucking beautiful. they look how velvet feels, which is odd, bc they're apparently silk. I don’t care they’re just so fucking lovely)

F O R T I N B R A S?

“HAMLET: O, I die, Horatio; The potent poison quite o'er-crows my spirit.” I’ve identified my emotion. Dread. pure, unadulterated Dread.

for all of you that’ve listened to the penumbra podcast: do you remember the concierge, right before final resting place, saying “you do realize you can just like, leave, and everything will be hunky dory and you won’t have to deal with the emotional consequences this episode will bring you” because i’m seriously considering doing that right now.

“HAMLET: The rest is silence. (Dies)” shit. (posting-antares here to say that i forgot to do the body count but honestly im crying while formating because of this goddamn fucking 400 year old play)

“HORATIO: Now cracks a noble heart. Good night sweet prince…” oh god. horatio.

“Good night sweet prince…”

(yet again tis transcribing-antares here to say that im fucking sobbing right now, the shoes are no match for this, and ‘goodnight sweet prince’ is actually never going to leave my head.) (editing-antares here to say im fucking crying again god fucking damn it) (posting-antares back again saying that this fucking line. this line. my god.)

“HORATIO: What is it ye would see? If aught of woe or wonder, cease your search.” oh, horatio. god. that isn’t something said without tears staining your skin and a bitter tone hard-won, not that its possession is a victory.

oh my god. this can’t. no. this can’t end like this. What. no. people must have rioted. No. no!!

i typically hate it but i would GLADLY accept a deus ex machina right about now!!

okay my friend just took my phone away from me and shut it off because i kept on trying to scroll past the end

jesus christ

okay so i’m not going to be okay for like, several eternities, so im going to play the sims until i. until i die, probably. my god.

masterlist

[babegroot]

1-200 :-) :-)

okay 200 QUESTIONS UNDER THE CUT!! you’re so sweet i don’t deserve your love

200: My crush’s name is: lmao I don't have a crush rn ;(199: I was born in: a hospital :)198: I am really: odd197: My cellphone company is: Virgin196: My eye color is: really light brown195: My shoe size is: 5 UK194: My ring size is: god knows??193: My height is: 5'4192: I am allergic to: n/a191: My 1st car was: I DONT HAVE A CAR190: My 1st job was: nor do I have a job 189: Last book you read: 'astrology' by yasmin boland188: My bed is: big187: My pet: a cat 186: My best friend: i have more than one? sos but rn I've been best friends with Tory for almost seven years now BESIDES MY MUM BC SHES THE REAL G 185: My favorite shampoo is: a turkish one I bought ages ago 184: Xbox or ps3: ugh neither 183: Piggy banks are: useful 182: In my pockets: you can find a vaseline 181: On my calendar: you can always see 12091282 different things to do 180: Marriage is: something that i am not sure about179: Spongebob can: make me laugh 178: My mom: is my best friend 177: The last three songs I bought were? now or never, why'd you only call me when you're high and do i wanna know?176: Last YouTube video watched: what's up - 4 non blondes175: How many cousins do you have? 25174: Do you have any siblings? in total 5 (only 3 by blood, rest is only step)173: Are your parents divorced? yes 172: Are you taller than your mom? no 171: Do you play an instrument? no 170: What did you do yesterday? slept a lot [ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: no 168: Luck: yes 167: Fate: yes 166: Yourself: lmao not really 165: Aliens: yes 164: Heaven: yes? but not the way religious put it 163: Hell: read the answer to the above 162: God: not really 161: Horoscopes: YES160: Soul mates: yes 159: Ghosts: yes158: Gay Marriage: yesssssss157: War: sometimes it is necessary ngl 156: Orbs: ??????155: Magic: yes [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: hugs 153: Drunk or High: lmao i like both but high is less messy so 152: Phone or Online: depends a lot ugh 151: Red heads or Black haired: red heads? brunette? both amazing 150: Blondes or Brunettes: LOVE BOTH 149: Hot or cold: in the middle 148: Summer or winter: summer in brazil, winter in london 147: Autumn or Spring: spring 146: Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla145: Night or Day: night144: Oranges or Apples: oranges143: Curly or Straight hair: depends a lot 142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonald's141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: white 140: Mac or PC: pc139: Flip flops or high heals: LMAOOOOOOO SO FLIP FLOPS but high heels are so pretty? I HATE CHOOSING UGH 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: ugly and rich? our society is fucked so im sorry137: Coke or Pepsi:  coke 136: Hillary or Obama: obama 135: Burried or cremated: cremated134: Singing or Dancing: both 133: Coach or Chanel: idk 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: idk mannn 131: Small town or Big city: big city 130: Wal-Mart or Target: i dont have these around here 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: adam sandler 128: Manicure or Pedicure: manicure 127: East Coast or West Coast: ??126: Your Birthday or Christmas: christmas 125: Chocolate or Flowers: flowers124: Disney or Six Flags: disney123: Yankees or Red Sox: ??[ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: not always necessary 121: George Bush: idk about him 120: Gay Marriage: should be respected119: The presidential election: NOT AMERICAN118: Abortion: a woman knows what's best for her and for her child and being born is not always the best option 117: MySpace: never had it 116: Reality TV: ugh dramatic 115: Parents: important for our development 114: Back stabbers: die bitch113: Ebay: so useful 112: Facebook: an easy way to connect with family 111: Work: gotta pay the bills110: My Neighbors: smoke a lot but are pretty quiet 109: Gas Prices: who knows108: Designer Clothes: not always that cute 107: College: where you find yourself 106: Sports: i wish i could actually do it 105: My family: my everything 104: The future: scary [ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: last week 102: Last time you ate: 2 hours ago 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: uhhhhh i dont remember 100: Cried in front of someone: I don't remember 99: Went to a movie theater: SO LONG AGO 98: Took a vacation: vacation rn 97: Swam in a pool: i cant remember rah 96: Changed a diaper: last year 95: Got my nails done: ages ago 94: Went to a wedding: ??93: Broke a bone: never92: Got a peircing: august last year91: Broke the law: a couple of weeks ago for a birthday 90: Texted: hour ago [ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: my stepdad88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: i've left home and i miss my mum's cofffee87: The last movie I saw: why him?86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: going back to brazil this year85: The thing im not looking forward to: completing my exams84: People call me: difficult/the astrology girl 83: The most difficult thing to do is: actually revising 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never81: My zodiac sign is: libra80: The first person i talked to today was: katie79: First time you had a crush: when i was 10 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: my mum 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: blair almost every single night76: Right now I am talking to: blair 75: What are you going to do when you grow up:  i have no clue

74: I have/will get a job: this summer73: Tomorrow: i'm revising with my friends72: Today: i'm staying in and feeling sad about not revising 71: Next Summer: i'll be in brazil70: Next Weekend: i'll be in ipswich 69: I have these pets: a cat, called pumpkin 68: The worst sound in the world: scratching a plastic surface 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: felipe 66: People that make you happy: my mum, sister and my brother 65: Last time I cried: last week 64: My friends are: SO MANY god i am not naming people here 63: My computer is: old 62: My School: is boring and got a long name 61: My Car: n/a60: I lose all respect for people who: lie and cheat 59: The movie I cried at was: "now is good"58: Your hair color is: dark brown57: TV shows you watch: brooklyn nine nine, from dusk till dawn,  riverdale and sons of anarchy56: Favorite web site: tumblr55: Your dream vacation: going around europe 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: idk 53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium52: My room is: quite big and bright51: My favorite celebrity is: eiza gonzalez? 50: Where would you like to be: in brazil, with my mum 49: Do you want children: yes 48: Ever been in love: yes 47: Who’s your best friend: my mum 46: More guy friends or girl friends: guy friends45: One thing that makes you feel great is: talking to my mum44: One person that you wish you could see right now: my brother43: Do you have a 5 year plan: kinda42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: not really 41: Have you pre-named your children: LMAO lowkey 40: Last person I got mad at: anees39: I would like to move to: brazil 38: I wish I was a professional: psychologist [ My Favorites ]37: Candy: n/a36: Vehicle: n/a35: President: n/a34: State visited: n/a33: Cellphone provider: n/a32: Athlete: n/a31: Actor: zane holtz30: Actress: eiza gonzalez29: Singer: maluma28: Band: the script 27: Clothing store: ?????idk 26: Grocery store: tescos25: TV show: brooklyn nine nine 24: Movie: the last song 23: Website: tumblr22: Animal: koalas21: Theme park: Thrope Park20: Holiday: summer19: Sport to watch: football18: Sport to play: none17: Magazine: none16: Book: milk and honey15: Day of the week: friday14: Beach: ??13: Concert attended: the 197512: Thing to cook: steak11: Food: bbq10: Restaurant: a restaurant in italy near my dad's friend's house9: Radio station: Capital FM8: Yankee candle scent: n/a7: Perfume: some cheap one from boots6: Flower: roses5: Color: white4: Talk show host: jimmy3: Comedian: idk 2: Dog breed: n/a1: Did you answer all these truthfully? yes thats why i look so confused