#OC: Hessi | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tryskomys · 9 months

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MOONCHILD

Remus Lupin x OC reader

Chapter 4 - Expulso

Summary: September’s full moon is rising.

previous chapter

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notes: this is uh…6k. take your bucket of tea and biscuits and strap in, reader. any alikeness of full moon remus™ and johnny from n*ked is mostly unintended. i truly apologize for this amalgam of quasi-smutty something. don’t read with your parents. hope you’ll like it though <3

tw: bad words, blood. unsanitary behaviour. unnecessary rudeness, unnecessary hotness, unnecessary humiliation if you squint - it's a wolf thing. minors, this is truly not for you. i know that this warning will probably just make you more curious, but i mean it.

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Weeks passed surprisingly quickly at Hogwarts. When an owl arrived with the first invitation to Hogsmeade, it was unfortunately scheduled on the weekend of the full moon. Hessie tried to convince Remus to stop by for at least a few hours. He has been carefully taking Snape's Wolfsbane, after all.

"Come on, Moony. A little fresh air will clear your head. And a few Butterbeers will dull some of the pain." she told him on the Sunday forenoon.

He resolutely declined, his matted hair tangling as he shook his head, an annoyed expression twisting his distressed features.

"We're not students, we can stop by Hogsmeade any time we want. I can barely walk, Mimi."

"I know...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to patronize you, I'm just -"

"Well then don't!" he exclaimed, his voice trembling.

Here we go, she thought to herself. She bit her lip, trying to mask the way it wobbled.

"I'm just worried, Remus. I thought it could help you relax."

"My favourite relaxing technique is eating children, is it?" he hissed at her, piercing her with a dull stare. She blinked a few times and then averted her eyes to the floor.

A burning sting just appeared inside his knee, as if someone stabbed it with a hot iron stake. The pain spread through his entire leg and made his ears ring. Fueled by the sensation, he chuckled in disdain.

"You can't even look in my disgusting face and you want me to go out and enjoy a drink with you?"

His voice was frigid and hostile. She looked up at him and opened her mouth to respond with some bitter remark, but she decided it would be wiser to let him be.

She spun on her heel and walked up to the kitchen corner, pouring herself a cup of herbal tea.

She heard a heavy sigh behind her, then the armchair legs squeaking against the floor. Then heavy limps got closer until she felt the coldness of his body behind her.

He put his large hands on her shoulders. They were chilly as ice, almost like the blood in his body stopped circulating.

He gave her a little squeeze and then placed a quick kiss on the top of her head. A friendly gesture, but it made her heart giddy.

"I'm so sorry, Mimi. Didn't mean it." he softly apologized. She nodded, leaning her head on his hand for a moment before taking another teacup from the mahogany shelf in front of her.

"I know. It will all get better soon, don't rack your brain over it now. Did you take your potion at night?"

His hands became rigid on her shoulder. He accidentally pinched her skin, so she whipped her head around. The horror on his face was expertly exchanged for an amused raised eyebrow. The grip on her arms didn't ease, though.

Snape's cold voice echoed in his mind.

Twice a day, Lupin. Or there will be grave consequences.

Fuck.

"Of course, I did, do you doubt my sense of responsibility? I was a Prefect, you know." he tried to make his voice as playful as possible. It was exhausting. She seemed to believe him, though, giving him a toothy grin.

"Yeah, I do know. You were always looking away from all the mischief, so I had to become the unpopular Prefect parent. Kinda convenient on your part. By the way, you're hurting me." she raised her eyebrows at him. When the brain fog caused by his chaste kiss finally cleared up, she realized the bruising grip he held her in.

He quickly tore his hands away and chuckled, apologizing. He took the other teacup and sank back into his velvet armchair.

"They're delivering the Grindylow in about an hour. I'm so excited, I haven't seen one in ages," she mumbled, a thrilled twinkle sparkling in her wide eyes. Remus pursed his lips.

"Really? I see one right in front of me."

She gasped and grabbed her Witch Weekly magazine from the kitchen desk and threw it at him. It flew right into the fireplace, all he had to do was move his head a few inches. He snorted with laughter and the tea flew out of his nose.

● ● ● ● ● ●

The Grindylow in question was very agitated by its dire situation, constrained in an aquarium on one of the desks in their office. It was furiously scratching on the glass walls while hissing out spits of water.

Remus And Hessie looked at it in awe, passionately discussing its special colouring.

"The kids are going to love this." she dreamily whispered, making him smile widely. Even though his cheeks were growing more hollow and pale throughout the day, the dimples still didn't disappear.

Her ears caught two voices echoing in the hall outside. One of them was surely Filch and the other one was eerily similar to James. Remus seemed like he was thinking the same thing.

"Speaking of the devil..." he mumbled and stuck his head out of the office door. Harry was walking by alone, heading for the Owlery.

"Oh, Harry! What are you doing here? Where are Ron and Hermione?" he questioned curiously, scanning the boy with raised eyebrows.

Remus was wearing a stretched-out cardigan with big brown buttons over a comfortable-looking cotton shirt. His usual grey suit pants were slightly cuffed, flashing his Gryffindor-coloured socks. Harry just shrugged, sadness glittering in his eyes.

"At Hogsmeade," he mumbled, voice disappointed. Remus completely forgot that the field trip was today, he tried to push the thought of his earlier behaviour out of his head.

"Oh, that's right...well, would you like to stop by our office? They just delivered us a Grindylow for the next lesson." he excitedly tilted his head inside the office. Harry gave him a quizzical brow.

"They delivered you a what?" he blurted out, following Remus into the room. Hessie was still crouching in front of the aquarium, eyes wide in childlike wonder. She turned at Harry, giving him a heartwarming smile and a small wave, motioning him to join her.

Harry couldn't help but blush at the way the woman's eyes calmed him down. She was wearing worn-out jeans and a large shabby sweater, fuzzy like the cat he'd met on the train. Her hair was down for the first time he'd seen her, sticking out in all directions.

The professors seemed to have a day off. The scent of books, chocolate and fresh cotton laundry (presumably her perfume) filled the boy's nostrils, creating a comforting homely sensation in his stomach. He felt the same way when he stayed over at The Burrow. Remus's excited voice tore Harry out of his thoughts.

"It's a water demon. It shouldn't be much trouble for us. You've already gone through Kappas with your professor here, so you're all set. But don't be fooled by its size."

"These beauties have tremendous strength in their fingers, even though they seem tiny. They could crush your neck within seconds with those," she explained, biting her lip when Harry backed away with wide eyes.

Remus threw her a disapproving frown and she stifled a childish giggle. The beast blew a raspberry and then floated into the depths of algae in the corner of the aquarium.

"No worries, Harry. As Professor Lupin said, you'll deal with it just fine." she slapped her knees and got up, walking up to Remus's desk. She gathered a few papers that were scattered around and stacked them in a neat bundle, then she hopped up on the empty spot and crossed her legs.

"Want some tea, Harry? I was just about to boil the kettle." Remus asked and Harry nodded, watching in awe as the man wordlessly knocked on the kettle and watched it puff out steam. Hessie beckoned Harry to sit down on the chair in front of the desk, apologizing for only offering prefabricated teabags.

He was studying her face, not realizing that he wasn't blinking. She raised an eyebrow.

"Is something the matter, James?"

Her eyes widened and so did Harry's.

"Merlin's beard. I'm sorry, Harry. You're just…"

That was everything she managed to stutter out. The glint in her eyes was acting as a mirror to his surprised face, but none of her tears rolled out. He wanted to ask a thousand questions all at once, about his dad, if she knew him, how she knew him, who he was. To sit here for hours and listen to her stories.

Were they friends? Enemies? Lovers?

"How did you get these scars?" was all Harry blurted out, regretting his question immediately after it left his lips. He got even more red now, feeling like his ears might let out steam as well. His eyes were widened in horror, but she gave him a mischievous grin.

Remus was too occupied with preparing three cups to hear the conversation.

"What if I told you that I got them in a battle with a Werewolf?" she hissed, theatrically jerking her body forward to make him jump in his seat. She giggled at his reaction, her heart easing when he echoed her laughter.

He was glad she took his personal question with humour. Even the most powerful wizard could not survive a duel with a Werewolf, he'd learned that from Lockhart's fake stories.

"Did you win?" Harry asked with an amused grin. It was as if James was sitting right in front of her. Her smile turned slightly sad before she straightened her back, putting on a humorous self-important facade.

She looked like she was mocking Snape's usual demeanour, the boy thought.

"If I told you, I would have to kill you," Hessie whispered and he chuckled again, thanking Remus when he gave him his tea. The shabby man walked around Hessie and rested in the armchair behind his desk.

Harry sat in front of them, staring into his cup. Small oil stains were forming on the surface, catching onto the porcelain walls. He looked lost in thought.

Not only was he imagining what kind of adventures she and his father lived through, but now he felt like even more of a coward, considering she probably compared Harry's courage to him.

"Anything that's troubling you, Harry?" Remus asked when he noticed the boy's thoughtful gaze. His voice was full of parental concern, something Harry has never encountered before.

He wondered if the man knew his parents as well.

"No...I mean, yes." Harry mumbled. Hessie furrowed her brows and crossed her arms. The boy was worried that he might've aggravated her somehow, but her strange eyes were filled with the very same emotion as Remus's kind words.

"Do you remember the lesson on Boggarts?"

"Of course." Remus simply stated, curious. Hessie just nodded, biting the inside of her cheek. Harry took a breath as if he wanted to inhale some courage.

"Why didn't you let me face him?"

Silence filled the room for a few moments before Hessie spoke, her tone was as calm as ever.

"We thought that the reason was quite obvious," she answered. Harry seemed impatient.

"But why?"

Remus cleared his throat, narrowing his eyes.

"We expected it would take the form of Voldemort."

Harry was in awe. He'd never heard someone call the dark wizard by his true name, except for Dumbledore.

Neither of the professors seemed shaken in the slightest, though. Like it was a completely normal and common name.

"I'd thought of him at first, but then I remembered the night on the train..."

Remus and Hessie exchanged a silent nod, it seemed to Harry as if they were talking about the Boggart incident before.

"Hats off to you, Harry. You are very wise, then. That means the thing you fear the most is fear itself." Remus ended the sentence with a sweet smile.

He looked very similar to the way Harry saw him on the train, but the young boy could swear he looked somehow...worse, now.

Not so tired, but very on edge, like he was about to scream from the top of his lungs any second. His cheeks seemed to hollow through the conversation and the professor was blinking quicker and quicker.

But none of it affected the endless softness towards his friend's son. Harry didn't seem scared, it was intriguing more than anything.

"You were worried that we didn't let you because we thought you weren't skilled enough?" Hessie questioned, leaning on her knees. Harry just nodded and before he could say anything, a loud knock on the door interrupted him.

"Come in!" Remus called, his smile growing wider when Snape entered the room, carrying a big smoking goblet of dangerous-looking turquoise liquid. When the man in black robes noticed Harry, he scrunched his nose a little before turning his attention to Remus.

"Here's your potion, Lupin. I made you a whole cauldron if you need extra aid."

"Ah, Severus. Many thanks." the young professor answered, taking the goblet from Snape.

It seemed to hurt him to stand up as he stretched for the potion and sat back down with a huff, putting the potion on the table. Snape didn't move.

"You should drink it now."

"I will make sure of it, Severus. Thank you." Hessie gave the man a soft smile. She did mean it. There was a flash of something unidentifiable in his gaze before he spun on his heel and walked out of the office without a word.

She looked at her friend with raised eyebrows when he didn't immediately start drinking. He tilted his head as if to scold her for watching over him like he was a little child. A wave of irritation washed over him, similar to the one earlier that day.

Harry cleared his throat, a bit distraught.

The smoke that the potion emanated smelled rancid and the bubbles on the surface hissed each time they popped. He was cautiously staring at it, eyes darting between the goblet and Remus.

He realized the boy is still in the room and turned his attention to him.

"I don't feel too well from time to time, Harry. This potion is the only thing that helps me. I'm very lucky to have Professor Snape as my colleague, this brew is extremely difficult. He's a wonderful Potionsmaster. I barely got an 'Acceptable' in my O.W.L.s."

● ● ● ● ● ●

They were serving steaks at the dinner feast. How convenient, Hessie thought as she watched Remus devour the bloodiest steak he could find in the mountain of meat in front of him.

Even Flitwick was curiously studying him from the other end of the table, not used to his old student being this unruly.

She cleared her throat and softly elbowed him in the ribs. He whipped his head around, staring at her with furrowed brows as if he was berating her for interfering. The circles under his eyes were dark purple now, contrasting with his pale face.

"What?" he spat out, mouth full of broiled potatoes. She scowled.

"Could you try and be more civil with your raw steak? It's not going to run away, you know."

He shook his head and shrugged, gulping down his potatoes. He still had frustration written all over his face.

"Didn't know it was illegal to eat around you, now. Besides," he took a moment to chomp another piece of the meat on his plate.

"It's almost up there. I'm leaving for the Shack tonight so you can enjoy your me-time, have a wank or something."

"W- what!?" she yelped. McGonagall snapped her head at Hessie and pierced her with a strict glare.

"Sorry, Minerva. I just realized the green stuff on the potatoes is parsley -" she half whispered, leaning back on her chair and tilting closer to the older woman.

"- and I'm allergic." she ended with an uncomfortable giggle. McGonagall was pretty blunt about not believing her a word, raising a quizzical eyebrow.

"You should ask Severus for some calming brew, then. Preferably in silence so the students wouldn't turn their heads," she stated coldly and turned her attention back to her dinner.

Hessie's whole face turned the same shade of red as the pieces of Remus's steak. She wiggled her chair closer to the table again and leaned her elbows on it, slowly lowering her head into her palms.

She didn't look at Remus, glueing her stare on the drops of vinegar on her salad.

"What do you mean the Shack? If anyone sees you, you'll get yourself fired on the spot." she hissed, grabbing her fork while the other hand still supported her flaming forehead.

Remus just finished his steak and dug around his salad to pick out tomatoes, pushing them around to an unwanted bundle.

"Not my fault you're so nosy."

"We had agreed that we'll stay locked in our chambers. I know you're nervous if the Wolfsbane worked, but Dumbledore counts on you staying in the castle. There's no reason for the potion to be faulty." she ignored his bitter remark, vigorously stabbing a tomato with her fork out of spite and throwing it in her mouth.

He didn't react, he just continued to play with the last potato on his ornate plate.

Usually, he'd give her a disapproving look, but now he didn't take his eyes off the food in front of him.

A bloodcurdling shiver ran through her throat as she slowly swallowed her bite.

"There's no reason for the potion to be faulty, am I correct?" she asked, her voice coming out as a mere trembling squeak.

He shrugged, nonchalantly checking his watch. Six o'clock. It was already dark outside. She lowered her tone to the most hushed whisper she could manage.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me. If this is your idea of a joke, then you can shove it up your -"

"My alarm clock cracked in my suitcase on the way here."

She gasped, choking on the lone tomato seed that was stuck in her throat.

Professor Sprout who sat beside her turned away from her conversation with Madame Pomfrey and slapped Hessie's back a few times, probably leaving behind red marks of her small chubby fingers.

"Are you alright, my dear?" she questioned, worryingly scanning the young woman's ruddy face. She nodded and forced a tiny smile.

"Thank you, Pomona. Bloody tomatoes." she wheezed and Professor Sprout chuckled, turning her attention back to the Matron. They continued a boisterous conversation about Sprout's growing collection of Angel's Trumpets.

"Aren't you a fucking wizard?!" she soundlessly screeched again. He seemed to be extremely fed up with her cross-examination.

"If you're so interested in what I do at night, maybe you could've reminded me, smartass," he said matter-of-factly. She gripped her fork tighter.

"Do I look like your mother?"

"Am I interrupting a lovers' quarrel?"

Snape's greasy hair appeared in her peripheral as he sat down next to Remus and took a sip of his wine. Remus's fingers started trembling and he took a breath to shoot Snape down with some stabbing remark, but Hessie was faster.

"On the contrary, Severus. We were just discussing the wonders of potion-making," she stated, throwing Remus a glare.

Snape seemed to notice and his mouth twitched with something that vaguely resembled a smile.

"Interesting. I could've sworn I heard Lupin call you a smartass. Must have been just a misinterpretation." he raised an eyebrow. Remus whipped his head around and Snape was a bit taken aback by how ill he looked.

"Sounds to me like you were spying on us, Sniv-"

"The potatoes are excellent today, don't you think, Severus?" Hessie loudly interrupted him, trying to smile through embarrassment when Snape's eyes widened in anger. He quickly gained his steel composture back, though.

"I prefer meat. If Lupin has left me any, that is." he taunted, casually taking another sip of wine.

That was the last drop for Remus. He swiftly got up, pushing his chair away with a loud creak.

He grabbed his plate, with the last potato and cherry tomatoes still rolling around, and curtly bowed.

"Good evening." he simply said and walked out of the buzzing Great Hall in long, shaky strides. Madame Pomfrey was the one to speak to Hessie now.

"Is Remus not feeling well, darling?" she questioned, her eyebrows knitted in worry. Hessie forced a gulp of wine down her throat and answered with a thin-lipped smile.

"Just a bit shaken, Poppy. You know."

"Well, you better go check on him. And stop by my chambers as soon as he feels abnormally sick, alright?" the older woman said, waving Hessie off as if she was just a roaming student. Professor Sprout fiercely nodded.

"I was just about to leave. I will let you know if - yeah." she managed to stutter out and hopped up, leaving her plate on the table. As soon as she stepped away, it floated into the air and levitated out of the door, disappearing.

Hessie said her goodbyes and hurried out of the door, ignoring Snape's bitter wish of sweet dreams.

She rushed through the hallways to their office, up the short stairs and through the invisible membrane that hid their chambers behind a wall.

She stomped through the narrow corridor between their rooms and entered the small common chamber. The door was already open. The flames were alight in their fireplace and disrupted the tense silence with loud cracks.

Remus was standing in front of it, bluntly staring at her, chomping on a large Mars bar. He was clearly trying to finish it as quickly as possible and get out of her presence. She crossed her arms.

"Which way?"

"What's it to you?"

"I asked you a question." she spat back at him, frowning when he theatrically rolled his eyes. He seemed at least two inches taller than usual, which was frankly already too much.

His elegant fingers were clutching the chocolate bar as if his life depended on it. Her eyes darted between them and his annoyed expression.

"Gregory the Smarmy passage, into the woods, under the Willow. Are we done with 20 questions? I have to leave."

Her frown grew deeper and she shook her head in disbelief. He was always on edge on the full moon nights, but it seemed somehow worse now. She didn't detect the usual remorseful undertone in his insults.

And the last time he'd declined company, she got away with a deep slash on her face. But that was ages ago.

"You think I'll leave you alone?"

He raised his eyebrows, sarcastically nodding.

"I mean, I hope so."

"Tough luck, buddy. I'm going with you. We have to figure out how to sneak out, though. Quickly." she took a glance at the big cuckoo clock above the fireplace. Seven o'clock.

She crossed the room and buried her arm into her patchwork handbag, trying to find something in the depths of the enlargening spell. She knocked over a bottle of Butterbeer inside.

He wasn't sure what she was looking for, but he didn't care, either.

He just took a bite of his sweet snack and spun around, making his way to the door. She had to do a double-take between him and the bag to realize he was trying to sneak out.

"Are you five? Can you wait for a second? We still have an hour." she called over her shoulder and sighed with frustration, taking off her green robes. She fished out her wand and dropped the fabric on the floor. She pointed the tip of it inside the bag.

"Accio Map!" she muttered and three yellowing tubes of parchment flew out. She clumsily grabbed them in the air with both hands and rolled them all open, trying to find the one holding the map of Hogwarts.

"Godric, I could've specified that." she shook her head and mindlessly tucked her wand into the small loop on her pants.

She dropped the two other maps and stared into the correct document while walking to the door.

"It's not the Marauder's but it will have to do."

She didn't have time to react when he swung his wand to levitate a teacup, trying to throw her off balance. He smashed it against the floor right in front of her and the liquid exploded, splashing her boots.

A piece of porcelain chipped away and bizarrely flew into the air, leaving a small cut on her cheekbone before falling back on the carpet. Her eyes nearly popped out of her skull when she looked at him, primal fury burning in her eyes.

He felt a nauseating sensation of hunger when he noticed the tiny carmine drop dripping down her cheek.

This is bad.

She blinked a few times, threw the map aside and grabbed her wand, daintily twirling it in the air to suck water out of the pitcher on the window. She quickly transcribed a precise circle in the air, forming a large floating bubble.

When she was positive it gained enough corporeality, she violently swung her arm, throwing it in Remus's face.

The bubble smashed against his skin with a muffled pop. He didn't even manage to notice the stench of iron in his nose before she expertly spun her wand again, this time forming the bubble out of the lukewarm tea in their teapot. She fired it into his chest with similar vigour as before, sending him stumbling back a few inches.

She knocked the wind out of him, so he wheezed and punched his ribcage a few times before finally realizing his nose was intensively bleeding.

He was growing increasingly disturbed, fully aware that he was losing the grip on his sanity.

If he was oblivious to his state of mind, his life would be a lot easier.

He sliced through the air with his wand like he was trying to cut it open, sending the coat hanger to the ground. She stumbled over it and barely managed to find her balance when he forcefully sent another tea cup flying. This time he aimed at her head and she swiftly dodged it, watching it smash against the books behind her.

She hoped the soundproofing spell was working.

Staring at the blood on her face caused a momentary lapse in his attention, allowing her to gain some time.

"Will you stop throwing things at me?" she grunted. As a last resort, she put all her force to trying to block the door by moving a closet in front of it. A few worn-out shirts and Remus's coat fell out, but the construction hadn't moved at all.

She was getting overwhelmed by the adrenaline, it made even the easiest of spells incredibly taxing. This situation seemed to suck the energy out of her and transfer it to him.

He seemed to be perfectly fine, apart from his face growing more pale with every passing moment. And the dark blood that was dripping from his nose

Her bubble might've broken it, he wasn't sure, the pain was non-existent to him.

"I will if you stop following me."

He emphasized the last three words by smashing flower pots against the floor, now sending them to burst next to her. He hadn't tried basic intimidation yet, so he decided to give it a go.

She flinched at each crack, but it didn't stop her from stomping through the shards. She just fiercely flung her hand and a protective glowing shield appeared around her boots before becoming transparent.

He didn't have to say a word, she recognized the straight line movement he drew with his wand. And the miniature blue orb that shot out, twinkling through the air as it tried to hit her.

Expulso.

Hessie's feline senses didn't fail her this time. She barely managed to duck, the orb flew by her ear with a high-pitched shrill and hit the bookshelf behind her. It began to crumble and fall upon the impact, but she quickly flicked her wand.

All the pieces suddenly moved in slow motion, defying gravity and unnaturally floating down on the carpet like a weightless feather. She watched the books and chunks of wood glide their way to the floor, mouth open in disbelief.

When she whipped her head back at Remus, he attempted to swallow the horror down his dry throat, but that only made it worse. He succeeded in staying perfectly still and masked his anxiety with a strict glare.

Her eyes were flaming with fury as she slowly walked up to him, just like a lioness prowls to her prey.

Remus could swear he saw her pupils shrink into slits for a split second.

He was glued to the ground, listening to the last echoes of humanity in his mind. They were telling him to stay put and not move a muscle. Maybe he would seem invisible to the moon that way. When she spoke in a silent voice, a frigid shiver ran through his vertebrae.

"Did you just try…to curse me?"

"You disobeyed and didn't stay where I told you to stay. You're being a bad kitty," he growled back at her.

The blunt sarcasm that dripped from his words stabbed her right in the abdomen.

She was merely a few steps away from him and he involuntarily took a step back, breaking the concentration he so desperately clung to. She reacted with a joyless smirk, her eyes now clearly cat-like.

"Oh, am I? How about I claw your fucking eyes out? Right now I'd manage to do that and never transform an inch of my skin."

He let out a bleak chuckle, now certain that he was slowly being cornered. He raised his wand again and so did she.

"I don't want to hurt you, love." he simply stated, emphasizing the last word with extra venom. Besides the anger, a new emotion flashed in her eyes - fear. She always took him for the better duelist.

"I'm not made of porcelain, you couldn't hurt me if you tried." she hissed and he broke into a smug smirk, detecting the slight strain in her voice.

He was fiercely battling the fact that it made him satisfied, thrilled, even.

You're a sick fuck, Lupin. A sick, sick brute.

That's the mantra he repeated in his brain over and over again. He was desperately trying to grasp it and shield himself from the Sword of Damocles that was hanging above his head. He could feel the carnal snap creeping in second by second.

It seemed to him like the moon sped up rising just to torment him.

She didn't seem to notice the growing madness in his eyes, only catching how his long fingers flexed around the handle of his wand. Thanks to his omnipotent senses, he caught her slip of concentration. He truly was in a foul mood now.

"If you stopped staring at my hands like a filthy slut, maybe your intimidation would be more convincing."

Words couldn't describe the whirlpool of emotions that rapidly shifted on her face when she snapped her sight back to his face. He still had a pompous sneer plastered all over it. A breath hitched in her throat as she narrowed her eyes, trying to build up the courage to continue cornering him.

"W- what did you just call me?"

The sentence came out as a mere whisper. He didn't move.

"I called you a sl- "

"I FUCKING HEARD YOU!"

Her scream resonated through the stone walls of their common room and she took the remaining steps to get as close as she could, digging the tip of her wand into the soft flesh under his chin.

He didn't even flinch at the sting of it. The sensation merely widened his smile and he let out a cold scoff.

"I wonder how well you'd hear me if I used one of Snape's little deafening charms. Or maybe a silencing one, so I don't have to listen to your constant nagging. Frankly, I should put that aggravating mouth of yours to better use."

The fading mankind in him couldn't believe his own words. Hessie responded with a strange inhuman noise that vaguely resembled a cat's snarl.

"You mean like letting me blast your brains out? You're tempting me."

"Likewise. Dear god, you see right through me. Always so insightful." he raised an eyebrow and proudly put his chin down to pierce her wand even deeper.

His wand was pointed at her heart and painfully poked into one of her breasts. Intentional or not, she wasn't sure. He continued.

"Although, you don't need your voice for that. You've always excelled in non-verbal magic, top of the class."

What the -

"That was a compliment. You're supposed to say 'Thank you, my dearest friend.' now."

It was like he could smell her thoughts. That wasn't a very comfortable feeling.

"Thank you for being a sarcastic prick? Endless gratitude. Want a golden star and your shoes polished for that?"

Remus snorted with laughter, tilting his chin as if he wanted to impale himself. He didn't appreciate being talked to this way at the moment. Her brows knitted, aware that he was winning the taunt war.

He loudly sighed and lowered his wand. He attempted to seem bored.

"Look, I'm getting kind of agitated and this could get pretty ugly real fast. So could you spare me this quasi-threatening hissing of yours and be on your merry way?"

"You have such a sunny disposition, has anyone ever told you?" she sneered and narrowed her eyes.

The smug smile started fading from his face, slowly turning into a frightening scowl. She hid her shudder by clearing her throat and impatiently bit the inside of her cheek.

"Be honest with yourself, do you actually want me to let you leave on your own?"

That slowed down his racing thoughts. Did he want that? Of course not. He hasn't been all by himself on a full moon for ages. It's not like he wasn't ready for the transformation, he was used to coping without Snape's potion.

But now, being back in Hogwarts seemed to change something in him. As if the castle's aura corrupted his mind. Maybe missing a dose of Wolfsbane made all of this worse.

Remus felt feral, his exhaustive senses were sending him over the edge. He felt like one big exposed nerve. And he couldn't risk being in her company, cat or human.

"Can't your almighty brain figure that out by itself?" he growled. He felt his remaining patience leak out of his ears.

The moon was nearly above The Great Lake and he could no longer trust himself around her. Even worse, he started to lose any care about that fact. Her frown just deepened.

"Why can't you just fucking say it? Why is it so difficult to admit that you need someone?" Hessie questioned, her voice loud in his ears. He flinched at the piercing sensation in his eardrums, his head pounding.

"If you don't let me go immediately, I will stop holding myself back. Trust me." he threatened, his voice hoarse and deeper than usual. His eyes seemed almost black now, eclipsed by their dilated pupils.

She attempted to gather some courage by straightening her back but failed.

"I'm not afraid of you, Lupin." she tried to sound as hostile as possible. Once again, she didn't succeed. He raised an eyebrow.

"You are not? You should be," he muttered, slowly bending closer to her. She finally lowered her wand and tried to back away. He grabbed both of her wrists in one hand and yanked her back, using his other hand to grab the collar of her sweater.

Remus bent down once again, but instead of choking her as she'd feared, he gently licked the carmine tear of fresh blood on her cheek and then ever so softly nuzzled his bleeding nose against her neck, taking in a trembling breath.

Her scent jolted through his senses like boiling lead, poisoning his mind with thoughts that made his sunken cheeks burn. His overwhelmed mind suddenly felt like a stretched balloon right before it bursts.

The facial hair on his chin scratched the soft skin of her clavicles, leaving behind red dots. Her heart was beating against her ribcage, delicious pain pulsing through her stomach.

She felt as if someone threw a bucket of simmering liquid on her face as her eyes fluttered closed, his warm exhale leaving goosebumps behind. She opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out.

"Your body deceives you," he grunted silently, his voice now almost unidentifiable. She felt his iron grip flex on her wrists when he breathed in her scent once more.

"Don't try to follow me. If you do, I won't be as charitable."

Then he let go of her with a jerk, avoiding her eyes like a plague. He backed away, stumbling over the clothes that fell out of the closet behind him. He barely gained stability again before storming out of the room and slamming the door behind him, not sparing her a single glance.

She hesitated for a few seconds before running to the door, her legs wobbling.

As soon as she reached the doorknob, though, it ominously clicked. She tried to pull it, wiggling it left and right, but it didn't budge.

"ARE YOU INSANE?!" she shrieked and flung her wand furiously, swinging the door open as the doorknob ripped out of its slot and fell on the floor with a dull thump. The hallway was empty.

Remus was long gone, leaving behind only the scent of blood and a crumpled wrap from his Mars bar.

She knew where he was rushing.

I hope you'll rot there.

And think of me.

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Tag list: @wickedsingularity @messyr-moons @moon-witchs-world

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tryskomys · 9 months

Text

MOONCHILD

Remus Lupin x OC reader

Chapter 5 - Silencio

Summary: Hessie is in for a rude awakening. Remus crawls through the fallout of his irresponsibility.

previous chapter

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notes: well well well, if it isn’t the consequences of your actions! enjoy!

tw: blood and injuries (in the slashing realm), foul words, damp dreams - not wet, damp. mildly sexy. just a heads up to anyone that’s very uncomfortable with anything that could vaguely resemble forcefullness - this one could bother you. i once again ask minors to sit this one out.

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"Your body deceives you. Don't try to follow me. If you do, I won't be as charitable."

As he stumbled over the clothes, she took advantage of his hesitation, forced out an exhale and stomped up to him. She waved her wand and the lion-shaped doorknob clicked.

Remus looked up from the pile of clothing and pierced her with the most hostile glare she'd ever witnessed. From anyone. She didn't think through her next steps after locking the door, so she opened her mouth and staggered a few steps back.

"I didn't -"

He charged at her, grabbed her by the throat and dangled her in the air all the way to the door. After putting her back on the ground, he slammed her against the wooden surface.

"Are you deaf?" he growled. The question seemed to crawl out of his lungs as if he was in pain. She clawed at his hand, but he didn't budge.

"You're hurting me." she wheezed and kicked him in the shin. She only felt his fingers tremble. He wiped away another pearl of blood on her cheek with the pad of his thumb.

He didn't ease his grip, though.

"Considering that you are doing everything in your power to get hurt, I'm starting to think you're daring me to do it," he said and she felt his heart skip a beat when she pressed her palm against his heaving chest.

She stopped scratching him. Instead, she began caressing his veiny knuckles, touch as soft as a single feather.

"You will be okay," she whispered. He let out a malicious chuckle.

"Don't you feel stupid? Aren't you ashamed of being such a vile, filthy, lying little whore?" he spat out, suddenly letting go of her neck. He hooked his fingers on the collar of her sweater.

She took a few strained breaths and tried the blink away the stars behind her eyelids.

"You talk too much, my friend." she breathed out.

Sneering, he tugged and ripped the fabric down the middle with ease. A cold wave washed over her naked body when ran his fingers along her ribcage and up to her clavicles. He impatiently tapped his elegant forefinger on her throat.

"Silencio."

Her eyes widened and suddenly, she felt like her vocal cords snapped in half.

He took her cheeks in his freezing palms, nudging his forehead to hers so vigorously her head banged against the door.

She wanted to speak, to scream insults in his face, to whisper a moan in his ear. But no words came out, no matter how hard she tried. She attempted to wiggle closer, to touch him, to tilt her lips forward and finally end this suffering.

He was ruthless. He held her just out of reach, his mouth grazing against hers when he spoke.

"I can smell you, you know. Every inch of your body, every clench of your cunt, every bead of sweat. It hurts so bad I can't speak. It's choking me."

He ran one of his hands along her jawline and grabbed her neck again, squeezing the bruised bare skin once more.

Her brows furrowed and she gasped for air, frustrated tears involuntarily rolling down her flaming cheeks. They fell on his sinewy wrist and alloyed with his own.

His wet eyelashes clumped together as he closed his eyes, his sweaty forehead still pressed against hers.

"Now you know how it feels."

Hessie's cheek was pressed on the burgundy carpet when she woke up. She blinked a few times and realized she fell asleep on the floor in front of the fireplace.

A terrific warm shiver spasmed through her body like someone splashed a boiling kettle under her sweater.

Her throat felt dry and sore as if it was still locked in the phantom grip of the man's slender fingers.

The blood in her ears pounded and deafened her, making everything around her fuzzy. She pushed herself up. A grimace twisted her face as her vertebrae cracked, muscles tender and angry. She stretched with a grunt and looked around the room.

All of their teacups were smashed on the ground, as well as three flower pots that sat in scattered soil. The bookshelf - at least, what was left of it, was now a mountain of wood and books, all moist from tea. The closet next to the door was open and a few of its contents were fallen out.

No sign of Remus.

She loudly sighed and attempted to get up, but her legs failed her when a buzzing black fog overshadowed her vision. When it faded, she tried again and managed to stumble to the armchair and lean on it. Her head was drilled with pain.

She tried to cross her arms, but her limbs were full of dull pain.

She rolled up her sleeves and spotted the purple bruises on her wrists. A sickening wave of fury jolted through her, but it disappeared again when she realized her cheek was stinging.

She walked to the bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror.

The old scars were still there, and so were her unusual eyes. The eye bags under them were slightly more protruding than usual, but what caught her attention was the red smudge on her cheek.

Some blood hardened on the wound overnight, but the stain still seemed fresh to her. She knew that was just a feeling, but she couldn't shake it off.

Your body deceives you.

His voice resonated in her thoughts as she mindlessly waved her wand in different patterns, moving everything in the chamber back to its place.

The clump of clay joined into a chipped flower pot again, and the porcelain cups flew back into their shelves with loud ringing. The bookshelf was the hardest task to repair, but after a few minutes, it stood back at its original place, only missing a few splinters that imploded under Remus's curse.

The only evidence left of last night's full moon was her.

Upon a quick check of her cracked wristwatch, she realized Remus was supposed to have this Monday's class in five minutes. Maybe he was already there. It couldn't hurt to check.

She quickly changed from her sweater to a clean shirt, threw her tweed vest over it and got into her green robes, tucking her wand inside.

She made sure her sleeves were rolled down to hide her bruising.

Hessie wouldn't be surprised if he was alright and just didn't want to see her after last night. She didn't do anything wrong, though.

Did she?

She remembered his words in her dream and her cheeks filled up with a painful blush. She didn't notice that her cut reopened upon the pressure, letting out a fresh pearl of blood.

Did she hurt him?

She rushed through the empty halls, the sound of her stocky heels echoing off the stone floor. When she reached the classroom, she was already two minutes late.

The room was packed, all students had quills and books ready on their desks, whispering among each other.

When they heard her steps, they all looked around and greeted their professor. Hessie walked in, trying to mask her utter terror under a warm smile. He wasn't here.

"Good morning, everyone! Uh..."

She clasped her hands when she leaned against her desk and looked around again as if he was going to pop out of hiding and laugh in her face.

Nothing.

"As you can see, I'm late today. I wholeheartedly apologize, I'm sure you didn't mind having a longer break, though." she raised her eyebrows and earned a few chuckles around the room.

She paused, took a heavy breath and shrugged.

"Sadly, Professor Lupin isn't feeling well today, so you'll have to cope with my old self. I'm sure we'll manage somehow." she gave the confused class a thin-lipped smile and sighed.

"Professor?" Hermione's careful voice caught her attention. She looked up at her and gave the girl a kind nod.

"Are you alright? I mean, there's something on your cheek."

Hessie's eyes widened and her fingers shot up to the wound on her face. It was warm and wet. She forced a grin and grabbed a napkin that was neatly folded on her desk under an empty teacup.

She pat the cut as dry as she could and chuckled.

"Thank you, Hermione. I guess we have an invisible killer cat on the loose."

The students giggled, too tired to think deeper about the implications of their teacher getting a bleeding wound overnight.

"Anyway, his absence also means that tomorrow's duelling class is postponed to Friday. I know -"

She was stopped by sad and disappointed groans.

"I know we'd promised, but Professor Lupin would put Weedosoros in my pumpkin juice if I went through with it without him. We'll do it on Friday and until then, remember to find a partner!" she walked behind her desk and browsed through her textbook.

"Now, the last time when we talked about Kappas, we had to cut the class a bit short and didn't get to practice, is that correct?" she smiled and waved her wand, swiftly catching an apple that flew out of the wicker basket next to the window.

"Now, I'm certain that they're still lurking somewhere in your memory, so before you forget, I'd like to teach you a simple counterspell to scare them off. Wands out and if you need a more coherent commentary than mine, you can find it on the page -"

She scanned the chapter index with her stained fingers, accidentally leaving a small smudge of blood on the paper. She tilted her head in annoyance and quickly tried to wipe her hand on her pants.

The red seemed to be shimmering with some sort of silver glow.

"- page 240 in your books." she smiled and took a bite of the apple, trying to ignore the biting alien sensation in her cheek. She dipped her quill in ink and started scribbling the attendance.

Her ears perked up suddenly.

"Merlin's pants, this beast is almost as scaly as Lupin's robes. He's probably missing because Filch mistook him for rubble and threw him in a trash bin."

Malfoy's hushed voice carried through the classroom and Hessie's eye twitched. She quickly glanced over at him, swallowed and continued writing.

"20 points from Slytherin, Draco. Keep your dashing humour outside the door of my classroom, please." she calmly stated.

He frowned, both confused and insulted by the fact she was using his first name.

"How the fuck did she hear me?"

"25, same goes for swear words."

He just looked at her with a gaping mouth when she finally raised her head.

"You'll come to find that I have a very peculiar kind of hearing."

"But-"

"It's 30 now, Draco, and if I catch you talking without my permission again I'll make it 40. Do we have a deal?" she cut him off mercilessly and took another bite of the apple with a loud crunch as she watched him reluctantly nod, his face full of disgust.

"Splendid," she muttered through the chewed pulp and gave him a sarcastic smile. She swallowed before turning back to the whole class, catching Harry's twinkling green eyes. He admiringly took in her every move but exchanged a puzzled shrug with Ron.

As entertaining as it was, she was uncharacteristically cross today.

"So, are we all ready? Good." Hessie said and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. She quickly glanced at her wristwatch before continuing. She wondered where he is. He didn't come back to the office, that's certain.

She moved in front of her desk and hopped up on it, swinging her legs. Harry frowned.

Not only was she shrunk in an exhausted hunch, but he'd noticed the way her cut was twinkling in the first morning sunbeams.

Her tired eyes were relentlessly darting between the students' faces and the door as if she was anxiously waiting for them to burst open.

"This special charm might sound simple, but don't be fooled. It can go very, very wrong if you don't pay your full attention to the conjuring. When I was in school, my friend once -"

A loud knock on the door stopped her and she softly frowned, instinctively grabbing her wand to open them with the flick of her wrist.

A familiar head of greasy black hair popped in, moving like a floating phantom through the corridor between desks.

"Professor Snape! To what do we owe the pleasure?" she questioned, her tone both puzzled and amused. Her friendly face fell, though, when she realized his expression is even stricter than usual.

"I'm gutted to disturb your lesson, professor. Madame Pomfrey demands your presence in the hospital wing." he stoically stated, not taking his eyes off her.

She was a bit taken aback when he stopped only a few inches away from her and bent down to her ear, raising his wand to his neck to cast a muffling spell.

"Lupin is in a lot of pain today. He needs your special skills." he sneered as her face froze, eyes widened in fear for a second before she remembered to compose herself in front of the children.

They were smart enough to realize it has to do with Remus, she didn't need to worry them any more than necessary.

She quickly put down her apple and raised her wand too, digging the tip into her sore muscles so hard she flinched.

"The Wolfsbane hadn't worked this week?" Hessie asked in a hurry and Snape gave her a court nod to disagree.

"Impossible. I have no idea what he was doing last night, but it seems to have mutilated him more than usual. And the slash on your face seems awfully suspicious. I thought we had agreed that you will keep your sagacious eye on him."

"I was trying to st-"

"Must I remind you of the school's policies concerning professors and their sexual relations with nocturnal beasts?"

Her eyes widened as she cursed under her breath.

Is he really bringing this up now?

He must be exaggerating to rile her up, she deduced so from his sharp sarcastic grin. She lowered her wand and turned to her class with a cramped smile.

"I'm very sorry, friends, but it seems like I have urgent matters to attend to. You know that Madame Pomfrey does not take no for an answer." she let out a forced giggle that drowned in protests and groans.

"I'm certain that Professor Snape is more than capable of a substitute." she turned to Snape, silently explaining to him what topic they were supposed to discuss.

The annoyed whispers got louder and she caught Harry's eyes for a second, as if he was begging her to stay. She just gave him a sad nod and swished her wand to throw the unfinished apple into the bin in the back of the class.

"Now now, be nice, everyone. We'll see each other on Friday for the duels. And to the Quidditch players present…best of luck tomorrow!" she added and waved her wand again.

A bundle of red, golden, yellow and black confetti sprung out of the tip and disappeared just before it fell on the table.

That seemed to have added a bit of colour and joy to the student's faces. She quickly turned to Snape, making him twitch when she patted his bony shoulder with a worried expression.

That face apparated him back.

Back to the worst days of his life.

Because the unwavering kindness in Hessie's eyes reminded him of her.

He felt a slight tinge of empathy jolt through his body when she spoke before he got back to his steel hatred.

"Thank you, Severus."

And with a swish of her ragged green robes, Hessie walked through the classroom with a strained grin, muttering goodbyes as she passed by the disappointed students.

Only the ones that sat in the very back of the class caught a glimpse of her smile falling and turning into a very badly concealed grimace of worry and distress.

The muffled sound of closing window blinds accompanied her as she turned around the corner.

Poor children, he seemed to be irritated. Well, even more than usual. She skipped steps and stumbled over the edges multiple times before finally reaching the hospital wing.

She opened the large ornate door and turned right to the private chamber for teachers.

Madame Pomfrey hovered above a tall figure that was curled up in a fetal position, wrapped in a thin blanket. She was pressing a wet rag on his forehead, muttering something under her breath.

When she spotted Hessie's worried frown, she sprung up and hurried towards her, the blood-stained apron fluttering in the rhythm of her steps.

"Oh, dear. Thank Merlin you're here. What happened to your cheek, sweetheart?" she took the younger woman's hand and led her to the bed as if leading a small child.

"Poppy, what's wrong?" she whispered as she stumbled through the room, unceremoniously dragged by her bruised wrist.

"I can't seem to stop the bleeding, I don't know what on Earth he's been doing. The usual charms do not work, Dittany evaporated immediately and he got sick as soon as the Wiggenweld touched his lips."

Hessie's heart dropped when she saw him.

Remus was sobbing, whining as if he was still in his werewolf form, digging bruised fingers into his knees as he hugged his legs. His head was resting in a pool of blood, his fine light hair matted and tangled. He had a large open cut along his neck and another two across his face, from the hairline to the tip of his chin.

The wounds were heavily bleeding, almost unnaturally so. Identical to the way her cut leaked out red.

She cursed under her breath.

"Oh, Poppy. Why didn't you send me an owl in the morning? Shh, it's alright, now. You'll be okay, it won't hurt anymore." she slowly sank onto the bed, hands already stained with blood as she tried to softly brush away the hair that was sticking to his sweaty forehead.

He was burning.

He twitched at her touch, almost as if he thought someone was about to hit him. It's been long since she'd seen him in this kind of state.

Madame Pomfrey sighed.

"Oh, Hessie. He's out of it, his mind isn't with us. If it was up to me, I would've sent you an owl right when Hagrid brought him in. He said he'd found the boy in the woods, he'd carried him all the way here in his arms. Completely naked and bleeding all over, scorching hot to the touch. But I managed to decipher some of his babbling and he begged not to call you in. I thought I'll manage without your spell as usual, but he seems uncommonly distraught today…Severus told me you were teaching, that it would be unwise to disturb you, but then Albus came in and requested your presence."

She tutted and continued.

"Merlin, as if there are not enough teachers in this godforsaken castle, someone could've substituted for you," she muttered irritatedly and sat down on the chair next to the bed, a compassionate tear falling down her wrinkled cheek.

Hessie sighed and took his hand, trying to release it from the cramped grip on his knee.

"It's okay, Poppy. It's not your fault. I don't know…I don't know what could've gone wrong." she gave her a small smile, doing her best to push back the guilt.

She knew exactly what went wrong.

She took out her wand, carefully turning his head to the side where the biggest wound was.

"Hold my hand, Remus. It's going to hurt for a moment, okay? Just squeeze my hand." she whispered, but he whined in protest and tried to squirm away.

"Come on," she said strictly and he reluctantly obeyed this time, bracing his semi-present consciousness for the familiar pain.

Hessie raised her wand to his face and mimicked movements similar to sewing and after a few seconds, a twinkling silver string appeared out of thin air with a silent crack, wiggling into his open wound like a thread.

A groan rumbled in his throat and he dug his fingernails into her knuckles, making her squeeze her eyes in pain for a second before continuing her spell.

She mumbled an intelligible song-like incantation, she was never even sure what she was saying. She only knew that the words helped her concentrate.

The wounds were slowly closing, held together by the silver thread that seemed to soak in the blood until there was only a red angry slash, closed but still emanating a soft sparkling glow, just like yesterday's full moon glittered on the surface of The Great Lake.

"Oh, Hessie, this charm…it is so beautiful to behold….what a shame it has to be used for this." Madame Pomfrey sniffled and breathed out a sigh of relief when the last pearl of blood on his cheek wiggled into the thread.

She quickly rushed to her office to get Hessie some Dittany for her cut and a wet towel so she could wipe away the carmine drops from her hands.

Remus seemed to be a lot more lucid than before, slowly releasing the steel grip he had on her hand and opening his puffy eyes to look at her.

"Don't you dare lock me anywhere ever again. What in Godric's name have you been doing?" she hissed at him when Madame Pomfrey disappeared behind the door.

She quickly regretted her cross demeanour, though, when she saw his guilt-ridden expression.

"I've looked worse, you know that." he simply croaked, his voice hoarse and painful to hear. He must've hurt some of his vocal cords, but she knew that Madame Pomfrey will fix that with a few swishes of her wand.

Before she could say anything, the older woman was back with a spool of gauze, a bowl of water and a towel. Everything floated behind her as if on invisible strings.

"My sweet boy, you are so brave." her motherly voice cracked as she waved her wand to direct the bowl and towel to Hessie's lap and hurried to bring Remus a large goblet of bubbling liquid that emanated a magenta fog.

"I know you are hurting, but you need to drink your Wiggenweld, boy. Pomona saved you some butterscotch pie from the breakfast feast, but you will get it only if you drink this dose to the last drop."

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Tag list: @wickedsingularity @messyr-moons @moon-witchs-world

#remus lupin x oc #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin angst #harry potter fanfic #harry potter fanfiction #marauders fanfiction #marauders oc #golden trio era #potterhead #remus lupin fluff #remus lupin fanfic #the marauders #professor remus lupin #remus lupin x you #golden trio #remus lupin smut #the marauders fanfiction #remus lupin

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