#Randy Cunningham: ninth grade ninja Julian

[amazingbananabread]

Lol, *Julian and Evil Julian/Ghoulians your catmen*

ALT VERS:

[who-do-i-know-this-man]

⚠️Vote for whomever YOU DO NOT KNOW⚠️‼️

[siren-darkocean]

Ninth Grade Samurai aka Samurai Series Incorrect Quotes

Of books:

Ninth Grade Samurai (Book 1)

Phoenix Song (Book 2)

Curtain Call (Book 3)

Nothing is accurate to canon y'all it's an AU!

Howard: This blood line ends with me!

Randy: That's the fanciest way I've heard someone say "I'm gay".

**

Heidi: (with finding herself in the middle of the Ninja and Samurai fights against the Sorcerer and McFist) I don’t go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me first.

**

Howard: What did you order this morning?

Rei: What do you mean?

Howard: I heard you answer the door, and I sensed food.

**

Rei: Comparing Howard and Randy is like comparing apples and oranges.

Howard: We’re both unique in our own ways?

Rei: Apples are superior in every way and all oranges should be eliminated.

Randy: Which one of us is the orange?

**

Randy: So oxygen went on a date with potassium, it went... OK.

Julian: I thought oxygen was dating magnesium, OMG.

Randy: Actually oxygen first asked nitrogen out, but nitrogen was all like NO.

Heidi: I thought oxygen had that double bond with the hydrogen twins.

Howard: Looks like someone's a HO.

Julian: NaBrO.

Rei: I'm done with all of you!

**

Rei: State your name, rank, and intention.

Randy: Randy, Randy, fun.

**

Heidi: Randy, you'll be working with Julian and Rei.

Randy: Alright! My fantasy threesome!

Everyone else: *blank stares*

Randy: ...Of people on a team.

**

Howard: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Randy: Milfs.

Rei: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

Heidi: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties.

Heidi: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.

Randy: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.

Rei: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

Rei: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

Heidi: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

Julian: What? No! It isn't!

Heidi: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

Howard: Heidi...

Heidi: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

Howardy: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

Heidi: HOWARD, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Howard: The word milf has been ruined for me.

Julian: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

Rei: Y'all are dumbasses.

**

Randy i and Howard: *making loud, shouty gorilla sounds at each other*

Julian:

Rei, exasperatedly: We have a guest.

**

Heidi: I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter “s”.

Rei: *looks over at Howard and Julian* Rei: Is it “sexual tension”?

**

Julian: Where’s my chair?

Rei: Randy broke it over Howard’s back while they were wrestling.

Howard: Correction, Randy was wrestling. I was eating soup.

**

Julian: Hah! 69! you know what that means?

Randy: What?

Rei: That you're a child.

Howard: HOW YOU GUESS MY IQ?!?

**

Heidi: What are you getting Howard for the holidays?

Julian: I don't know. It's kind of hard buying a gift for your partner when they already got everything they could've ever wanted when they married you. So I'm not sure yet.

Rei: I'm getting Howard a divorce lawyer.

**

Heidi: I told Howard to grab snacks for everyone.

Rei, looking through the options: Why did you grab fruit snacks? Are you five? Who even likes Fruit Snacks?

*Julian, Howard, and Randy raise their hands*

**

Rei: This food is too hot... I cant eat it.

Randy: You’re very hot, and I still eat you.

Everyone at the table: *silence*

Howard: YOU GUYS ARE DISGUSTING!

Julian: One dinner... I just want ONE DINNER!

**

Julian: *about Rei and Randy* They make a cute couple, huh?

Howard: They certainly are standing next to each other.

**

Heidi: I sleep with a gun under my pillow.

Julian: I sleep with a knife.

Randy: Both of you are pathetic.

Heidi: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?

Randy: Rei.

**

Rei: *does 99% of the work*

Randy: *has no idea what’s going on*

Julian: *says they’re gonna help but does not*

Howard: *disappears at the very beginning and doesn’t show up again until the very end*

**

Heidi: Why are your tongues purple?

Rei: We had slushies. I had a blue one.

Randy: I had a red one.

Heidi: oh.

Heidi:

Heidi: OH.

Howard:

Howard: You drank eachothers slushies?

**

Post curtain call ig

Julian: Why is Rei crying on the floor?

Heidi: She's drunk.

Julian: And?

Heidi: She saw a picture of Randy's spouse.

Julian: But she's Randy's spouse.

Heidi: I know.

**

Howard: I still don’t have a New Year’s resolution.

Rei: You could lose a few.

Heidi: You could be less lazy.

Randy: Don’t be such a bitch.

Howard: Okay DAMN, SHIT.

**

*The gang when they drop food on the floor*

Rei: Aw man. *Throws it away*

Howard: Five second rule!

Julian: Foolish germs, thinking they can stop me!? *Eats it off the floor*

Randy: *Sobs on the floor*

**

Randy: It’s Christmas! Are you all in a Christmas mood?!

Rei: Merry crisis.

Heidi: Jingle bells, jingle bells, single all the way.

Howard: Hoe hoe hoe.

Randy: Guys, please.

**

Howard: Ducks are better than rabbits.

Rei: What? Rabbits are adorable. Have you ever been in a fight with a duck? Ducks are jerks.

Julian: Duck is delicious! Rabbit is all gamey.

Rei: We’re not talking about flavour, Julian!

Julian: Flavour counts!

Rei: Who carries around a duck’s foot for good luck? Anyone?

Randy: You wrap yourself in a comforter stuffed with rabbit hair. I’ll wrap myself in a comforter stuffed with duck feathers! Who’s cozier?

Rei: Okay, but-

Randy: NO, NO, NO, NO. WHO’S COZIER?

Julian: Then why don’t we take a rabbit, a duck, stick ‘em in a cardboard box and let them fight it out!

Rei: BECAUSE IT’S ILLEGAL, JULIAN!

Julian: ONLY IF WE BET ON IT, REI!

Howard: I- Jesus-

[mdhwrites]

I Wish I'd Found the Randy Cunningham Ninth Grade Ninja Fandom

I LOVED that show when it was first coming out. I thought it was just a ton of fun and that characters like Viceroy and Mcfist were genuinely amazing takes on their archtypes. Admittedly, Randy and Howard are entirely classic to me since I grew up with stuff like Danny Phantom and Kim Possible but...

None of you probably know what I'm talking about.

Okay, so a bit over a decade ago now, Disney had a show called Randy Cunningham: Ninth Grade Ninja. The premise was actually kind of Sailor Moon S1 in with half of its villain group. The Ninja exists to oppose the Sorcerer, trapped below the town. The Sorcerer feeds on misery and can corrupt people who are vulnerable through items and the like that they hold dear, turning them into monsters who are usually beat either by destroying the object or convincing the person to give up their grievance.

The other half of the main villains (it had a lot of side villains too of course) were the duo of McFist and Viceroy. They employed a lot of robots, mutants, etc. because, well, McFist was so rich as to practicallly own the town and be beloved by all (Think Lex Luthor but bad at hiding it and really shouty) and Viceroy was literally his on staff MAD SCIENTIST! He even graduated second in his year from a mad science university. Or first. Can't remember despite it being a plot point for an episode when a skeleton that the science teacher is... Married to I think? Comes back to life and tries to finish his graduation project that would have made him Valedictorian: A Doomsday Device. After all, if you blow the world, you are indeed the greatest evil scientist apparently.

The show was pretty classic in how it was structured and played thing and when I say classic, I mean it. It had a moral of the episode format, usually taught through ancient ninja rhyme through the book that gave Randy, the main character, his powers: The Ninjanomicon which is a great name. It would also be what helped grant him various ninja tools to beat bad guys, though his main weapon was the ever changing length scarf he had and a sick ass sword.

The show also had a good sense of humor about what it was though. Like the first episode's lesson from the book is that the greatest weapon is within the suit. When Randy gets his ass kicked, he believes it must be trying to tell him to believe in himself, draw in deep and OPE NOPE! It means there's a sword in the suit! Time to get to slicing and dicing!

The downfall of the show for me was the same thing that makes me actually surprised it didn't stick around longer than it did (besides Disney being honestly pretty stingy with seasons for the past decade for its shows): It being formulaic. Eventually, I did get tired of seeing Randy making similar mistakes or do things that felt like he should have outgrown. Sure, his best friend Howard rarely if ever changed and that could pull him down but it still eventually stopped feeling right. The episode that snapped it for me was when Julian (I can't believe I remember his name), the wanna be magician of the school went full supervillain and got real magical powers. It was a neat turn... Predicated on Howard and Randy being complete assholes to someone they'd at least once or twice called friend.

And that is what the real shame of the show for me was. There was a lot you could actually read into and say about the eb and flow of relationships and sometimes even the show had great fun with it. One episode in particular that I loved was when Howard accidentally gets the ninja powers and people like how he showboats while doing it so Randy questions being the ninja. The two guys are cut from the same cloth, best friends for a reason, but the show REALLY highlighted that eventually, a conflict between Howard and Randy was going to come to the head. Why?

Well... Because Randy is just a dumb teenager who wants to be popular. Howard is an asshole. It's not even the first episode that highlights it but every time it gets highlighted, it's a BIG problem for Randy. In this one, Howard is so cruel to a robot, takes his time to mock it so thoroughly that eventually the robot gets corrupted by the sorcerer and all its weaknesses are now strengths and it's damn near unstoppable. I forget how Randy beats it (besides just being better with the powers) but it always stuck out to me as a reminder that Randy WAS a hero, despite his flaws, and that the ninja before him had made the right call choosing him (not sure if we ever got an answer as to WHY Randy got it, though that was by no means necessary.)

It's just the sort of show that I had enjoyed enough that I wish I'd had more people to share in it while I was enjoying it. I could admittedly try going back now and seeing how it is but well... It's a decade old and had protags all about trying to be cool. Danny Phantom used regular, classic tropes for this while Randy actually tried to embrace the fact that stuff like influencers were starting to exist and become more popular so you can probably imagine its sense of humor by that. I wouldn't call it bad but the last time I tried rewatching the first episode, I remember not finding it nearly as charming as I had the first time, let alone as charming as my brain thought it was.

But on that note, I will say possibly one of the least controversial thing I ever have, just to let fellow fans squeal with me: Holy shit was Randy and Baton girl my absolute OTP of the show and I still get all sorts of happy anytime I'm reminded of the two.

And if you're going "Wait, was she a background charact-" NOPE! THEY LITERALLY CALLED HER BATON GIRL! If she ever got an actual name, I don't know it! And god are elements like that why I've never forgotten that show, for good and for ill. Edit: She was named Theresa in S2. Thank you to the commenter who reminded me!

[nostimroads]

Xr-X-X   X-X-X   X-X-X

"We're all doomed! Finally, DOOMED!"

[shoobjuice]

This ones for all u Julian fans out there

[vellichorom]

I mean, HE’S no sinjin knightfire but -----------

[zozo-333]

I have a lot of headcanon of Julian’s family, and one of that is he have a little sister name Judy. And she very, very love her big brother.

[cockyroaches]

Have some OTP doodles! Didn't ship Stevens with anyone at that point so his ship isn't here XD I don't think I've ever posted anything Debbie/Howard or Bash/Buttermaker related? Now you have my full batch of pairings, all of them are garbage~~~

[connerskids]

character’s name (full name, if given): Accordion Dave/David Hernandez

apparent age: 16

gender: DMAB enby (he/they pronouns)

source material(and why it’s bad, this part is optional): Randy Cunningham Ninth Grade Ninja, had racist portrayals of POC, an abusive "friendship" treated as normal, and treated their LGBT coded character like shit

pictures of character:

TERRIBLE edit by me

–this part is all up to you!–

birthday: 7/09/2002

sexuality: Homosexual

personality: Dave is a quiet, soft spoken boy with special interests for possums, accordion and anime. He has had a TERRIBLE life (will touch more on that later) and, due to extensive trauma as a child, suffers from CPTSD, DID, HPD, insomnia, depression and anxiety. He also struggles with alcoholism and hypersexuality.

likes: Possums, accordion, anime, Pokemon, pastels and cottagecore

dislikes: Bright colors, flashing lights, DeviantArt (he has bad memories of that site), Black Butler, and baths

fears or triggers: Hoooooooo boy. CSA, brothers, priests, churches, cults, branding, religion, broken bones, the nickname "Davey" and self harm are the major ones, but I'll expand more on his lesser ones later.

relationship status: Dating Haruto Kacchan, a foreign exchange student from Japan!

friends: Julian, Theresa, Debbie, Randy and Juggo!

moodboard:

@luigiskids @asherschildren

[who-do-i-know-this-man]

⚠️Vote for whomever YOU DO NOT KNOW⚠️‼️

[who-do-i-know-this-man]

⚠️Vote for whomever YOU DO NOT KNOW⚠️‼️